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Author Topic: I messed up  (Read 2754 times)

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Offline 2late2turnback

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I messed up
« on: June 27, 2011, 12:29:55 AM »
Hi everyone,
I am currently posting in the "Am I Infected", but soon to be "I just tested Poz".  I don't have any questions, just needed to vent.  I had a risky encounter with someone I had been dating for roughly 3 months, we NEVER had unprotected sex until one night I was too intoxicated to remember.  We didn't talk for a while after that, no texting or calling...I asked what was going on with him and was advised "he just had some things going on that he needed to sort out".  Guess I now know what it was, "jokes on me".  I didn't start putting two and two together until I got a cold sore on my lip.  I have never had one up until that point.  Of course it made me go straight for the computer and start looking up information...  Still, I didn't quite get it until I was researching herpes and it lead me to HIV.  Well, I gotta say...everything played back in my head, and although I didn't want to think about it, I know I will soon have to come to terms with it.  I guess I shouldn't complain too much, my symptoms probably have been mild in comparison to some others... About a week after the cold sore, my skin started to itch, I went to the restroom, and saw about what looked like 7 bite marks, but they went down after about 3 days.  Within about the same time, my bottom lip started hurting, and I washed my face, then wiped it with alcohol, soooo about 3 days after that, I get a bunch of these little itchy bumps all on my chin and alongside my nose, which based on what I've seen falls right into place with eosinophilic folliculitis.  My face is still somewhat itchy, but I've gone to the store and bought some allergy medication and some cortisone, which seems to help keep it at bay.  My skin in general is itchy in comparison to how it used to be, and i keep breaking out.  I haven't quite figured out why my toes and fingers get numb, but I'll find out more as I begin this process.  Well, now I have some bumps on the inside of my cheek, one on each side, and the back of my tongue has some type of indentation on the side that is sore. I also have an extremely dry mouth, and a not so great taste to top it off, so I drink water all day to no avail.  I called and explained to him what I already know to be true, but he's playing the "I don't know what you are talking about" game.  He's even agreed to go get tested Tuesday, but I will bet that won't happen.  I think once this has been confirmed I am going to work on moving out of state, I really just don't want to be here anymore.  It's funny how life is, right in the middle of things finally turning around for me, I get stuck by a thorn while walking through my field of roses.  I feel like I want to cry, and sometimes like I can't breathe, so I can only imagine the type of anxiety I will have once they call and confirm.  Guess it's good I have some vacation days, because I plan on taking a few to just lay in bed and sleep this empty feeling away.  Sorry to have rambled on and on, but, I don't have anyone else to talk to about this...Well, I hope everyone has a nice night, and I'll be back soon so I can be moved to my new location.

Offline RapidRod

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Re: I messed up
« Reply #1 on: June 27, 2011, 04:50:00 AM »
Yes you are rambling and getting the cart before the horse. Your symptons are not HIV specific and the only way to know your status is by testing.

Offline Ann

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    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: I messed up
« Reply #2 on: June 27, 2011, 07:24:21 AM »
2late,

Were you too intoxicated to remember to use a condom or is it that you cannot remember if one was used or not?

If you think you had unprotected intercourse, then you need to test. The earliest you should test is at six weeks. The vast majority of people who have actually been infected will seroconvert and test positive by six weeks, with the average time to seroconversion being only 22 days. A six week negative must be confirmed at the three month point, but is highly unlikely to change.

Nothing you describe symptom-wise points to hiv. However, we do not discuss symptoms here. Neither the presence nor absence will ever tell you a single thing about your hiv status - ONLY testing at the appropriate time will. Ad a sexually active adult, you should be testing on a regular basis anyway.

Here's what you need to know in order to avoid hiv infection:

You need to be using condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, every time, no exceptions until such time as you are in a securely monogamous relationship where you have both tested for ALL sexually transmitted infections together.

To agree to have unprotected intercourse is to consent to the possibility of being infected with an STI. Sex without a condom lasts only a matter of minutes, but hiv is forever.

Have a look through the condom and lube links in my signature line so you can use condoms with confidence.

Anyone who is sexually active should be having a full sexual health care check-up, including but not limited to hiv testing, at least once a year and more often if unprotected intercourse occurs.

If you aren't already having regular, routine check-ups, now is the time to start. As long as you make sure condoms are being used for intercourse, you can fully expect your routine hiv tests to return with negative results.

Don't forget to always get checked for all the other sexually transmitted infections as well, because they are MUCH easier to transmit than hiv.

Use condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, correctly and consistently, and you will avoid hiv infection. It really is that simple!

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline 2late2turnback

  • Member
  • Posts: 7
Re: I messed up
« Reply #3 on: June 27, 2011, 09:56:23 AM »
@ Rapid, I really wish that's all it was, but I feel that I didn't dodge that bullet.

@ Ann, we met one of my friends out @ a club.  He (my friend, not the guy I was dating) was located in an area that was really devastated by a natural disaster, but he fortunately only had roof damage.  Long story short, we went out to celebrate that he was still ok in the midst of so much gone wrong, I had wayyy too much to drink and don't really remember much past being in the club.... I don't even remember leaving.  The next thing I remember is waking up in one room, the guy I was dating was in the other room, and I asked him what happened.  I figured we had sex, but couldn't remember.  I didn't know for sure we had unprotected sex until he confirmed it weeks later.  I'm not making excuses, nobody put a gun to may head and made me drink, I just don't understand why he thought then was a good time to do that, well I do now, but we under no circumstances prior to that time had we had unprotected sex.

I understand the importance of testing, and I'm scheduled to go today, just not looking forward to the inevitable.

Offline Ann

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  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: I messed up
« Reply #4 on: June 27, 2011, 10:54:52 AM »
2late,

It's not "inevitable". As you have been told, none of your symptoms point to seroconversion illness.

I hope it's been at least six weeks since this incident occurred, otherwise you're wasting your time testing too soon.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline 2late2turnback

  • Member
  • Posts: 7
Re: I messed up
« Reply #5 on: June 27, 2011, 05:27:24 PM »
Ann,
It has been... I just got down getting the bloodwork done not too long ago, results in by the end of this week... Will keep you posted, hopefully I will be able to eat between now and then, lately I've been too worried to eat. 

On another note, I really wish there was a way to get this site out to more people, I think after reading a few stories, especially in the "I just tested Poz" forum, it really brings the reality of this epidemic home.  There are a lot of us dummies still playing roulette, or standing too close to the table and eventually getting pulled in.  I think what you guys are doing is great, but just think more people need to know about this prior to "messing up". 

Offline Ann

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  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: I messed up
« Reply #6 on: June 27, 2011, 10:20:33 PM »
2late,

After all that blathering on about your meaningless symptoms (meaningless in terms of diagnosing hiv), you never said what the time frame is that you're dealing with. When was your last incident of unprotected intercourse and where in the window period did you test?

As for getting people to know about the site, well, if you tell two friends, and they tell two friends and those four people also tell two friends etc, word will get out, at least in your area.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline 2late2turnback

  • Member
  • Posts: 7
Re: I messed up
« Reply #7 on: June 28, 2011, 07:00:08 AM »
The last incident was the end of April, on the 30th... Got tested yesterday.  I have already started telling people about the site, and explained to people that it is way more informative and real than picking up a newspaper reading stats or just googling information.  I most definitely plan on trying to get more people to visit this site.  You all provide tough love, but you also provide support.

Offline Ann

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  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: I messed up
« Reply #8 on: June 28, 2011, 09:18:24 AM »
2Late,

That means you tested at just over eight weeks. If it really is "2late" for you to protect your negative hiv status, then you will more likely than not get a positive result.

If all the symptoms you list had anything to do with hiv seroconversion, you will have created enough antibodies by now. Seroconversion illness is not a reaction to the virus itself, it's a reaction to the process the body goes through while creating antibodies.

If your result is negative, then I do not expect it to change when you confirm at three months.

And here's your dose of "tough love" - I hope you test negative and I hope you damn well learn a lesson from all this. If you do get a negative result, I'll kick your ass if you turn up here again! USE CONDOMS - NO EXCEPTIONS!

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline 2late2turnback

  • Member
  • Posts: 7
Re: I messed up
« Reply #9 on: June 28, 2011, 12:16:00 PM »
Thanks Ann! That really means a lot, and I have most definitely! Learned my lesson.  That got me off that "drinking wagon" also.  There is no way I need to have so much to drink that I'm unaware of what's going on, absolutely no excuse for that.... But all in all, either way I have learned a most valueable lesson, it really made me think about other things in my life, and give a different perspective.  It also brought me here, and I'm glad to have met you. :)

Offline 2late2turnback

  • Member
  • Posts: 7
Re: I messed up
« Reply #10 on: June 30, 2011, 05:52:04 PM »
Results back in, BIG FAT NEGATIVO!!!! I am sooooooooooo happy!!! Ann, thank you for taking the time to respond, and no worries, no future ass kicking will be required! :)

Offline Andy Velez

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  • Posts: 24,703
Re: I messed up
« Reply #11 on: June 30, 2011, 06:06:03 PM »
That's great news. You do need to re-test at 13 weeks for a conclusive result, but with that negative it is very likely you will continue to test negative.

Whew!
Andy Velez

Offline 2late2turnback

  • Member
  • Posts: 7
Re: I messed up
« Reply #12 on: July 01, 2011, 10:33:34 PM »
Thanks Andy! And most definitely Whew! Wiping my brow... I did want to tell you all I now understand why you all are adamant about stating symptoms mean nothing... I had more blood work drawn today cause I have still been feeling really crappy, even landed me in the ER... Well it was confirmed that I have  Mycoplasma pneumonia... And check out the list of symptoms...

Chest pain
Chills
Cough, usually dry and not bloody
Excessive sweating
Fever (may be high)
Headache
Sore throat
Less common symptoms include:

Ear pain
Eye pain or soreness
Muscle aches and joint stiffness
Neck lump
Rapid breathing
Skin lesions or rash

Who knew?! You guys did! Lol...  Thanks for all that you do, it is more important than some people realize.

Offline Ann

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  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: I messed up
« Reply #13 on: July 02, 2011, 07:46:56 AM »
2late,

I'm glad to hear you investigated your symptoms further and found the real cause. All too many times people refuse to think outside the hiv box and that could lead to serious problems down the line with other illnesses being ignored or discounted.

I fully expect your three month hiv test to also be negative.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

 


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