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Author Topic: Should I lie about my status to get a job I want?  (Read 9586 times)

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Offline PozJeepGuy

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Re: Should I lie about my status to get a job I want?
« Reply #50 on: June 12, 2011, 12:08:32 PM »
Jake

I wonder if you are slightly shoehorning your own experience of wanting to be open into what may not be right for others.

The only reason I would tell at work, would be if it was helpful to me.  Feeling liberated and breaking down prejudice does not cut it with me.  I don't mind anybody knowing I'm gay, but would draw the line at them knowing my penchant for raw cock.

Not shoehorning. I personally have seen nothing but kindness and understanding from all I've told when it comes to  the professional side of my life. When I started meds they kinda messed with me and employer knowing that gave me some slack. It was and still is greatly appreciated. I believe with them knowing it has helped with scheduling my doctor appt.s and for me I was promoted two days after I received the news so I have to admit for the first month it was hard to concentrate. With my employer knowing all this it really has made life simpler.

I don't know why this thread is so important to me other than to say we have enough to deal with mentally , physically, and emotionally. 

Sorry if my grammar isn't perfect. Half the time I post I'm on break from work and using my iPhone to post.
Jacob Perry

I refuse to wear my HIV as a badge of shame any longer.

Offline buginme2

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Re: Should I lie about my status to get a job I want?
« Reply #51 on: June 12, 2011, 12:38:07 PM »
It is great you had such a positive experience (pun intended).  I wish everyone the same.  We all know that is not likely. 

Sometimes its OK to lie.  I just would hope you understand everyone may not receive the same reaction and some people may not be ready to disclose yet.

Offline PozJeepGuy

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Re: Should I lie about my status to get a job I want?
« Reply #52 on: June 12, 2011, 12:44:22 PM »
Bug you really need to back Of on riding my ass.
Jacob Perry

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Offline PozJeepGuy

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Re: Should I lie about my status to get a job I want?
« Reply #53 on: June 12, 2011, 12:44:57 PM »
Oh sorry that is off my ass
Jacob Perry

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Offline buginme2

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Re: Should I lie about my status to get a job I want?
« Reply #54 on: June 12, 2011, 12:49:33 PM »
What the hell are u talking about

Offline PozJeepGuy

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Re: Should I lie about my status to get a job I want?
« Reply #55 on: June 12, 2011, 12:54:21 PM »
Ann has warned you and now I am.  You know what
Jacob Perry

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Offline buginme2

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Re: Should I lie about my status to get a job I want?
« Reply #56 on: June 12, 2011, 12:58:24 PM »
Warned me about what? What the hell are u talking about? Bit of a loose cannon today are we?

Offline PozJeepGuy

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Re: Should I lie about my status to get a job I want?
« Reply #57 on: June 12, 2011, 01:01:22 PM »
You are hijacking this thread. Easy to be a big man when it comes to typing. Try living it.  Oh wait it's ok to lie your way threw life   
Jacob Perry

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Offline buginme2

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Re: Should I lie about my status to get a job I want?
« Reply #58 on: June 12, 2011, 01:04:51 PM »
 ???

Offline Joe K

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Re: Should I lie about my status to get a job I want?
« Reply #59 on: June 12, 2011, 01:10:41 PM »
If you really want this job, then I suggest you do some research on what your options really are.  Having experienced HIV discrimination first hand, I know how difficult it can be to be judged by your disease.  However, with that being said, I think that, as your boss, I would have a real issue with your lying to me, as opposed to telling me at some point in time.  What I would try to do, is to avoid the question entirely if possible, but once you got the new job, I would find a way to inform my superiors of my health status.

For me, securing a new job is not the time to worry about advocating for the rights of pozzies.  Yes it is wrong to be questioned about health issues and there are laws that are meant to protect, but this goes far beyond any law.  The main focus to me, is for you to develop a great working relationship with your boss and that can only come from being an honest employee.  Therefore, I suggest you do whatever possible to avoid any reference to your health, during the hiring process and see what happens.  If you get the new job, then I suggest you speak with HR and officially advise them of your status, if you feel it is necessary.

It all comes down to acting like a mature adult and being honest about your reality.  It does not mean you do not try and protect yourself, rather it means that if your employer thinks so much of you, to offer this opportunity, then you have a duty to be honest with that employer.

Offline buginme2

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Re: Should I lie about my status to get a job I want?
« Reply #60 on: June 12, 2011, 01:28:32 PM »
In addition to not having to be an advocate for a disease simply because you have that disease, there is also a degree of privacy that people should be afforded.  In the US, FMLA laws allow you to take time off work for chronic illness without disclosing what the illness is to your employer.   An employer doesn't have the "right" to know and you are not obligated to share.  I don't see how that is at all not being honest.   

Offline Rev. Moon

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Re: Should I lie about my status to get a job I want?
« Reply #61 on: June 12, 2011, 01:49:04 PM »
Typical Bugger. Comes in criticizing others while simultaneously doing the exact same thing he's whining about. Then cries like a little bitch when he gets smacked for it. People in glass houses and all that......

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Offline GSOgymrat

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Re: Should I lie about my status to get a job I want?
« Reply #62 on: June 12, 2011, 01:51:34 PM »
.My other concern is that I would need (assuming I get offered the job) a clean bill of health from my doctor.

Since you don't actually know if you will be offered the job and you don't know whether they even require an evaluation from your doctor then of course you should apply for the position. If you are offered the position and they do require a "clean bill of health" from your GP then, before signing a consent for release of information for your GP, I would discuss the situation with your GP. I would make a case with the GP that my health is good by every measure, that HIV would not affect my ability to do this job and that I would like him to sign off that I have no medical conditions that prevent me from working. That is the truth. If he has any reservations I want a rational explanation.

Offline Joe K

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Re: Should I lie about my status to get a job I want?
« Reply #63 on: June 12, 2011, 02:00:51 PM »
In addition to not having to be an advocate for a disease simply because you have that disease, there is also a degree of privacy that people should be afforded.  In the US, FMLA laws allow you to take time off work for chronic illness without disclosing what the illness is to your employer.   An employer doesn't have the "right" to know and you are not obligated to share.  I don't see how that is at all not being honest.   

I made my suggestions because of the unique nature of the job that the OP has described.  It involves working in other countries which may have restrictions on pozzies and if so, his boss has a right to know his status.  This is not an issue of being honest, as being smart.  If something were to happen to the OP, while working oversees, the last thing he needs is his boss to be told that he is sick because he is poz and the boss never knew.

But more important, at least to me, is having a boss who will accept me for my abilities, regardless of any medical concerns.  IMHO this job would require telling someone, within my company about my status, for my protection as well as that of the company. 

Offline Solo_LTSurvivor

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Re: Should I lie about my status to get a job I want?
« Reply #64 on: June 12, 2011, 02:26:03 PM »
Every person is different and every circumstance/situation is different. What works for others may not work for you because they are not YOU. Not everyone wants to be the poster boy for gay rights and/or HIV stigma reduction.

Only you know what works best for you.

I had to second this notion. All my life because of the fact that I have been thin, I have been the brunt of manorexic and crack addict jokes.

About a decade ago I worked for a major corporation in finance closely with the top Managing Director of a certain division that paved the foundation for what happened in 2008 when the bottom fell out.  Anyway, there was this one woman who always made it a point to direct inappropriate "you sure are skinny" and "you need to eat more" remarks my way any chance she got, especially whenever the higher ups were around, as my boss had other managers under him so I was always around them during my work day.  

So one day while she was waiting for me to set up something that she needed my boss' approval for, she really went there by commenting on how I was so thin and asked if I was sick and I looked her straight in the face and asked if she were jealous over the fact that I could eat anything I wanted and not gain an ounce while she didn't have the same luxury.  Needless to say, she never approached me again in that manner.

And based upon what spacebar said, I could only imagine what would've been said about me if that entire division knew my status, despite the fact that I am sure they were aware of my sexual orientation; as there were a handful of other gay men and lesbians who worked in the department and it was no big deal, albeit none of us openly came out of the closet and flaunted it.  But for someone to be gay and poz, I'm not so sure how that would've played out.

So basically, I agree - a person has to do whatever they feel is right for themselves, no matter what it is pertaining to their life. Unless you walk in someone else's shoes, you can only empathize with what they go thorough as an individual.
« Last Edit: June 12, 2011, 02:28:16 PM by Solo_LTSurvivor »
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Offline Miss Philicia

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Re: Should I lie about my status to get a job I want?
« Reply #65 on: June 12, 2011, 02:31:43 PM »
Eat, Papa, eat! Nobody likes a skinny Santa!
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Offline lost_boy

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Re: Should I lie about my status to get a job I want?
« Reply #66 on: June 12, 2011, 02:32:29 PM »
If you really want this job, then I suggest you do some research on what your options really are.  Having experienced HIV discrimination first hand, I know how difficult it can be to be judged by your disease.  However, with that being said, I think that, as your boss, I would have a real issue with your lying to me, as opposed to telling me at some point in time.  What I would try to do, is to avoid the question entirely if possible, but once you got the new job, I would find a way to inform my superiors of my health status.

That's the issue. I suspect my immediate bosses would be supportive if I had a quiet word. But corporately, it would be a fight.

I also should have declared my HIV status immediately when I found out... but I did not (number of reasons, as I was steal dealing with the news in my own head). It's kind of too late now as well ("you were diagnosed 18 months ago and you only tell us now?!"). But, I'm still functioning, doing the same job, and doing it better at it than many of my co-workers!  ::) meh!

lost boy sorry if I came across preachy.  I just wanted to share that its not always bad to disclose.  When I first came here everyone told me the same about not disclosing.  I just wanted to share a experience where some one has disclosed and it actually has made things easier.  Its not always a bad thing.  

Hey Jeepguy, no worries. It bothers me that I have to hide something about myself and that really, I am just reinforcing the stigma that pressurises us all and being "part of the problem". I mean, I wouldn't have to hide it if I had cancer, or diabetes, or any number of things... In fact you'd get treated with the utmost sympathy and understanding. It just sucks that HIV does produce does not produce this kind of response, for all kinds of complex reasons. It's the same with mental illness, really.

I'm just a realist about these things. If it helps peoples to understand my situation, I work in a military environment. I'm gay, and I'm open about it, but it took me a while to reach that stage as I just had to make sure it wouldn't become an issue. And it hasn't. But I think it would be a step too far to disclose I have HIV and yes, I am aware I am running a risk of losing my job, but no, I don't think this gamble outweighs the possible benefits of disclosure.

I'm also not certain that the disability and equaliities act protects me in this instance - my employer does have a genuine need to know things that could affect my work in theatre. However, I'm not "front line" by any means. The fact remains that the corporate understanding isn't there - I could argue til I'm blue in the face about how I can and do live a normal life with HIV, bar popping a pill every 24 hours, but that would require a lot of fighting that I'm not sure I can win, and attention I do not want being drawn to me.

I would discuss the situation with your GP. I would make a case with the GP that my health is good by every measure, that HIV would not affect my ability to do this job and that I would like him to sign off that I have no medical conditions that prevent me from working. That is the truth. If he has any reservations I want a rational explanation.

That's basically what I'm going to do as the next step this week! Let's see how it goes... At the end of the day, if I can't persuade a doctor to give me a go-ahead and a "fit to work" statement, it won't matter anyway.

Or... I might just make a hash of the interview and not get it for more mundane reasons, and all this discussion will just be thereotical!!  :P

Offline lost_boy

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Re: Should I lie about my status to get a job I want?
« Reply #67 on: June 12, 2011, 02:37:59 PM »

Solo_LT, as a fellow sting bean, I feel your pain!

And based upon what spacebar said, I could only imagine what would've been said about me if that entire division knew my status, despite the fact that I am sure they were aware of my sexual orientation; as there were a handful of other gay men and lesbians who worked in the department and it was no big deal, albeit none of us openly came out of the closet and flaunted it.  But for someone to be gay and poz, I'm not so sure how that would've played out.
That's basically it. Gay - not a problem (unless I was really mincing it up, but then even then I suspect some people would find that hilarious...). Gay and poz - I'm not sure how people would react to that.

As an aside, as I'm thinking about this - a colleague of mine has recently recovered from an operation to remove a tumour from her neck. She had a very dark sense of humour, and will crack jokes about her cancer ruining her holiday, and so on. It's how she deals with it, and is comfortable enough to laugh about it. I think that's the healthiest approach to these things, but when she does it publicly, I can see some people laugh and others look awkward, stare at feet, not know what to say... and that's people's reactions when discussing cancer, which has affected almost everyone or somebody you know and is widely understood. Imagine the awkwardness and lack of understanding to openly discuss HIV, let alone cancer, in a workplace environment.
« Last Edit: June 12, 2011, 02:42:46 PM by lost_boy »

Offline lost_boy

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Re: Should I lie about my status to get a job I want?
« Reply #68 on: June 12, 2011, 02:41:39 PM »
deleted, double post!

Offline denb45

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Re: Should I lie about my status to get a job I want?
« Reply #69 on: June 12, 2011, 03:00:32 PM »
WHEW! I just read this entire thread, and wanted to have my say here, I tested POZ on the job, so, they found out about my POZ-status, after that, I only lasted  5 yrs. in that job, and went on to another job, I didn't tell of my POZ-status until a few yrs later when I started getting sick & missing work, they were very supportive, and didn't dang-me for not disclosing status when i was hired-on...

 i did good work, and they like my work, i had more experience and training then most of them, so, i was in-charge of what they weren't doing correctly on-the-street, i lasted almost 10 yrs. on that job and retired-out and went on SSDI disability w/ a Teamsters Pension for the rest of my life, it's ok, if you don't wanna disclose, and it's ok, if you do, it's really up to you and nobody else, that's my 2 cents here  ;)
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Offline wolfter

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Re: Should I lie about my status to get a job I want?
« Reply #70 on: June 12, 2011, 04:59:44 PM »
, it's ok, if you don't wanna disclose, and it's ok, if you do, it's really up to you and nobody else, that's my 2 cents here  ;)

Well said!  Short and to the point.
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Offline Ann

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Re: Should I lie about my status to get a job I want?
« Reply #71 on: June 13, 2011, 07:57:31 AM »
Lost, one thing that you would need to consider with this new job is travel insurance. Your company probably has a policy that covers their employees, but with most travel insurance, any pre-existing health conditions have to be disclosed. If something health-wise happens while abroad and you haven't disclosed a pre-existing condition, the policy is usually rendered null-and-void.

I only know of one firm in the UK that will cover hiv as a pre-existing condition. They do not increase the premiums for someone on treatment and stable, or someone not on treatment with good numbers. They also do corporate accounts. I've used them while travelling and so has my poz bf - they are a good company.  http://www.freedominsure.co.uk/

It may well be that the pre-existing health conditions aspect of travel insurance is why your company are being so interested in the job candidates' health. Something to think about.
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Offline Assurbanipal

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Re: Should I lie about my status to get a job I want?
« Reply #72 on: June 13, 2011, 08:28:18 AM »
Lostguy

It seems there are a few issues here:

1) Whether you want to disclose to co-workers.  If you do want to disclose, doing it third-hand via a form is not likely to produce the best results.  The personal touch helps...

2) Whether your employer feels that, due to the nature of your work you need to disclose.  Typically a large organization will have an HR department that can help you if you have a question on this.  That would enable you to find out whether you are a long term fit.  Ann has posted some general info on UK law, but you are not sure that would protect you, so again I'd encourage you to reach out to a UK ASO and see if they know of other people in similar employment and how the law worked.  If the law does indeed protect at least your interactions with HR, then you could have a discussion with them to find out whether the health info you provide will be shared with a team of your co-workers.  If the info is protected, that info may wind up being redacted before the form is shared (or your conversation may remind HR that they need to have it redacted). 

If the company really believes it important that your co-workers in theater know your status, and you are unwilling to disclose it, that's one thing.  But maybe you should find out.
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Offline Hellraiser

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Re: Should I lie about my status to get a job I want?
« Reply #73 on: June 13, 2011, 02:05:52 PM »
A couple of moving parts to this discussion.

Is it reasonable to think that they will not require you to not only disclose but eventually test you for hiv?  If they're just going to test you anyway lying won't help you.

Will your HIV+ status interfere with the work?  Due to the different countries you may be traveling to and the length of time you may be staying will you be able to discreetly obtain meds all the while keeping said countries unaware of your status?

If you think you can pull this off then I would say go for it, but there are a lot of hurdles to your goal it seems like.

Offline emeraldize

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Re: Should I lie about my status to get a job I want?
« Reply #74 on: June 13, 2011, 04:34:46 PM »
Hi --

I wanted to clarify something. When I first replied to your thread, I thought you were a US citizen. I've had a couple of situations in which an ID doc has offered to write "around" the dx.  That is why I wrote.

With Ann and others in the UK advising you, you're getting great input for sure. I still believe your ID doc or one of his colleagues might have insight about this type of situation -- they've had several decades to help people navigate employment and other legal issues.

Of course, we're all awaiting your next post and direction on this.

Em

Offline buca45

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Re: Should I lie about my status to get a job I want?
« Reply #75 on: June 13, 2011, 09:12:41 PM »
Jake,


You've stepped out and worn your poz status the like badge of honour it is.

We salute you.






MtD
Really? 'badge of honour'? Really?
While I am not AS embarrassed about it as I used to be, it sure as hell is not something I am proud of having nor do I let it define who I am as a person. It is MY thing and not everyone I come in contact with needs to know my personal business.
I think it is ridiculous to expect Lost to 'hold his head high' and become a stigma eliminating role model for all of us to follow. Being an advocate for all HIV Positive people vs landing my dream job? I'd take the dream job!
If it does not 'feel' right for you to disclose, don't do it. I am more of a 'cross that bridge when you come to it' kind of man, so I would not disclose at this crucial time. Should it come out at a later date, then deal with it then. As long as you are able to perform the duties of this new position to benefit yourself and the company, then who needs to know about it?
I am with others in saying 'keep us informed' about the outcome.
Good Luck with your decision.
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Offline Ann

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Re: Should I lie about my status to get a job I want?
« Reply #76 on: June 14, 2011, 09:43:18 AM »
Well, like I said in reply #71, I have a feeling Lost's company is so interested in the health status of any candidate for this job is because of the travel insurance issue. Any pre-existing health conditions that are not disclosed can cause a whole lot of trouble down the line if the employee is unfortunate enough to become sick or injured - or even die - while abroad.

There is a way around this - but it involves disclosing. It is possible in the UK to obtain travel insurance while having a pre-existing health problem and it's not just limited to hiv; cancer and diabetes, for example, can both be covered. Lost's company may not even be aware that there is an insurance company who will cover such people and who also do corporate accounts. It could possibly be a case of Lost helping out his company.
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Offline leese43

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Re: Should I lie about my status to get a job I want?
« Reply #77 on: June 14, 2011, 02:43:23 PM »

 colleagues who are friends would see it as part of the assessment process (it's meant to be confidential within the team I'm applying for, but I think we all know how these things work in real life).



Sounds to me like the HR department are treading on very thin ice in allowing colleagues to assess on whether you are capable of doing a job or not partly based on your medical history. Are they qualified in the medical field to do this?

You absolutely do not have to disclose to work colleagues. if you feel that you should disclose to the company then I'd suggest that you make an appointment to meet with an HR officer or higher. Explain to them first that you wish to speak to them confidentially and that you do not expect the information you give to them to be divulged without your permission.

Explain that you will be applying for the position and are aware that they'd like information on your medical history and that, although you know that it should not make any difference to your application, you wanted to explain the situation to them in person because you were not going to write it on the form for all of the team to see.

I'd also go armed with Ann's info on travel insurance and give it to them saying that you're sure that would be their only concern.

I did it this way and it worked in my favour. I know that doesn't necessarily mean it will work in yours but they really wouldn't have a leg if you could prove they passed you by because of your status and I'm quite sure your HR people would know this too.

Leese
« Last Edit: June 14, 2011, 02:53:10 PM by leese43 »
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Offline Ann

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Re: Should I lie about my status to get a job I want?
« Reply #78 on: June 14, 2011, 08:11:49 PM »
Really? 'badge of honour'? Really?


Really. It's a badge of honour when you refuse to let other people make you feel ashamed. The more we hide, the more we have to hide.

I'm poz and I refuse to hide it from anyone. I'd rather go hungry and jobless than to deny who and what I am. If any employer had a problem with my being poz, I would refuse to work for them - and I have.
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"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline ARMANDO

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Re: Should I lie about my status to get a job I want?
« Reply #79 on: June 15, 2011, 07:51:03 AM »
when i first became positive i did not disclose to my company basically because i didn't feel that i would ever get sick,so it was never their business!!This company is one of the largest employers in the state.Anyway during the first year i developed shingles on the right side of my face and head ,the most painful thing i ever experienced!!!After several weeks of being out sick i decided to inform my company of my status.The following few days i was called into a meeting where all of my fellow employees were seated along with my supervisor and his manager.The meeting was being held to determine if any of my fellow employees had ANY PROBLEMS in working with me because of my status.One by one each one stood up and declared if they had a problem or if they just were not sure.I was mortified,scared,angry and i ended up leaving the meeting in a daze.Well  after this episode i decided to take things into my own hands and started to find out about disability and requirements for social security.I have been on disabilty and social security for almost 18 yrs.I KNOW that this happened to me over 18 yrs ago but have things really changed as far as the rights of a person being hiv +.I PRAY THAT THEY HAVE !!!

Offline mecch

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Re: Should I lie about my status to get a job I want?
« Reply #80 on: June 15, 2011, 10:57:01 AM »
The following few days i was called into a meeting where all of my fellow employees were seated along with my supervisor and his manager.The meeting was being held to determine if any of my fellow employees had ANY PROBLEMS in working with me because of my status.One by one each one stood up and declared if they had a problem or if they just were not sure.I was mortified,scared,angry and i ended up leaving the meeting in a daze.

18years ago, ok, but still, UNfuckingBELIEVABLY cruel and offensive.
ďFrom each, according to his ability; to each, according to his needĒ 1875 K Marx

Offline ARMANDO

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Re: Should I lie about my status to get a job I want?
« Reply #81 on: June 15, 2011, 11:32:17 AM »
i do remember that after that meeting ,my boss called me into his office and sat me down and advised me that i should consider JUST QUITTING!!HE SAID THAT I SHOULD JUST TAKE WHAT I HAD IN MY PENSION(ABOUT 35,000) AND QUIT.I'M telling this story because i  totally belive that a person should seriousily think about disclosing his status to his employer,if the situation had been different for me at the time ,i would have NEVER disclosed!!!

Offline lost_boy

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Re: Should I lie about my status to get a job I want?
« Reply #82 on: June 15, 2011, 06:58:40 PM »
Hey all,

Thanks very much for your input. It is all food for thought... the stuff about travel insurance, visas for countries that don't allow in people with HIV, all give me pause. But, I'm gambling that nothing bad happens while I am away. (if it does - I'll have to cross that bridge later!).

So, I've spoken to a few people.

- I had a discreet word with a close friend of mine who is currently doing the role I'm applying for. I mentioned, in a roundabout way, health concerns, though I did not spell out exactly what, and he was sympathetic enough not to ask. He spelled it out for me: if I want the job, don't mention it. Don't mention anything. Don't even say you get bad migraines. Health issues = no job.

Strangely this reassures me (hey, it's not just HIV that would knock me out the running, it could be as simple as a bad back!). And I'm pretty sure it's the company being overcautious, but that's the nature of the beast. An individual with no health issues will get the job over a candidate with a health issue. So it's that simple.

- I spoke as well to my HIV doctor. She advised that I should go to my GP (regular doctor) in the first instance, and explain the situation. If it's a letter saying I'm "fit to work", he should hopefully be able to provide me with that. If it's a case where they send an actual questionnaire, he's duty bound to fill it in correctly (and then I am rumbled and up shit creek). IF that's the case, they can help me out, but she pointed out it may raise questions why I'm getting a specialist rather than my local doctor to sign the form. She continued though that I'm not the only person in a similar predicament (she used an example of airline cabin crew who have HIV, so therefore have to travel lots etc) and there's ways to get through it.

She also assured me they'd be happy to give me a couple of extra months medication in case of emergency/so I have a backup if travel is delayed or for whatever reason. This is also good news, think it's because they know I'm not about to disappear to outer Mongolia or sell the drugs on the black market or something equally ridiculous... I've been a good citizen with them!

So all in all, this could work. I'm also going to have a word with an HR person to check my position (as Leese43 rightly advises). Although my medical file should stay under lock and key with HR, I do think they get disseminated in particular instances such as this where "appropriate". Ultimately I'm just not clear where the information ultimately ends up, and who with, so until I know it's the cautious approach for me. (I also don't have much faith in my HR team, most of my dealings with them have been fraught when it comes to even the most minor issues like missing pay slips!).

Armando - what a horrible story :( I'm really sorry you were treated that way. Regardless of when it took place, it's truly despicable.

Offline David_CA

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Re: Should I lie about my status to get a job I want?
« Reply #83 on: June 15, 2011, 10:25:38 PM »


- I had a discreet word with a close friend of mine who is currently doing the role I'm applying for. I mentioned, in a roundabout way, health concerns, though I did not spell out exactly what, and he was sympathetic enough not to ask. He spelled it out for me: if I want the job, don't mention it. Don't mention anything. Don't even say you get bad migraines. Health issues = no job.

Those were my feelings all along.  Employers simply don't want sick employees or employees with health issues.  In an employers mind, people with health issues tend to miss more work than those without.  This doesn't mean that those of us who are HIV+ miss more work than anybody else; I think I've missed about 3 days due to shingles and a cold since diagnosis over 5 years ago (not including when I was hospitalized with PCP).  Overall, I have a better attendance record than the HIV- people at work, which is probably the rest of the department. 
Black Friday 03-03-2006
03-23-06 CD4 359 @27.4% VL 75,938
06-01-06 CD4 462 @24.3% VL > 100,000
08-15-06 CD4 388 @22.8% VL >  "
10-21-06 CD4 285 @21.9% VL >  "
  Atripla started 12-01-2006
01-08-07 CD4 429 @26.8% VL 1872!
05-08-07 CD4 478 @28.1% VL 740
08-03-07 CD4 509 @31.8% VL 370
11-06-07 CD4 570 @30.0% VL 140
02-21-08 CD4 648 @32.4% VL 600
05-19-08 CD4 695 @33.1% VL < 48 undetectable!
08-21-08 CD4 725 @34.5%
11-11-08 CD4 672 @39.5%
02-11-09 CD4 773 @36.8%
05-11-09 CD4 615 @36.2%
08-19-09 CD4 770 @38.5%
11-19-09 CD4 944 @33.7%
02-17-10 CD4 678 @39.9%  
06-03-10 CD4 768 @34.9%
09-21-10 CD4 685 @40.3%
01-10-11 CD4 908 @36.3%
05-23-11 CD4 846 @36.8% VL 80
02-13-12 CD4 911 @41.4% VL<20
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Offline Ann

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Re: Should I lie about my status to get a job I want?
« Reply #84 on: June 16, 2011, 10:15:49 AM »
Lost, if you do not disclose your status and get the job, then if I were you, I'd take out a travel insurance policy with Freedom. As I said earlier, any pre-existing, undisclosed medical issue will make a policy null-and-void if and when you need it.

Your company probably has an insurance company that covers their travelling employees, but if you had your own personal policy, you could get around being left high-and-dry should something of a medical nature happen while you're abroad. You never know, you could be in a traffic accident and even though being poz would have little or no bearing on your medical treatment, if it is discovered that you are poz the policy would be rendered null-and-void and you would have to pay out-of-pocket for your care.

The company I linked you to earlier has policies which can run for a year and cover multiple trips. Their prices are reasonable, particularly when you consider that most companies will not issue policies for someone with a pre-existing condition like diabetes, heart disease, cancer or hiv. When I went travelling with my neg bf, our premiums were exactly the same as I had a low VL and CD4s in a normal range. He had no other pre-existing conditions. Their premiums are only higher when someone is not particularly well with whatever pre-existing condition they have.
Condoms are a girl's best friend

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"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

 


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