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Author Topic: ars? worried sick  (Read 4856 times)

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Offline kank

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ars? worried sick
« on: April 29, 2011, 06:23:13 PM »
i am a very stupid women who has just embarked on a 5 week affair with an ex from 6 years ago.  i had both protected and unprotected sex with him and actually started PEP although did have a few unprotected occasions during this time.  when on holiday 3 weeks into pep i started with night sweaths although it was hot i would wake with a sweaty chest and had a cough and was smoking about 15 fags a day dont normally smoke.  the day after finishing PEP i got a rash between my breasts which itched when appearing then stopped itching i asked my GUM doc and he said was nottypical HIV rash but tested anyway which came back neg.  later that day i had a mouth ulcer which i cant remember if i had been biting my lip wit nerves.  this ulcer dissappear within a day and have been paranoid about checking temp with ear thermom which ranges from 98.5 to 101 although when checking husband who has no possible hiv infection his is always hgher.  i have now started with panic attacks and anxiety and cant stop crying.  every night i wake with a sweaty chest not enough to drench clothes but i wipe and gone.  yesterday i had a mild sore throat and aching right leg.  it will be 4 weeks past pep and 3 from last sex.  i had a test done at gum and awaiting results.  i keep checking temp which changes each time and today my face feels really hot.  i have tole hubby of affair and he is supporting me but still have this under lying fear i have caught something.  when asked ex he has given blood in dec and last unprotected encounter was 2 years ago approx.  i have always trusted him but can not stop myself panicking think it is the guilt!!!. i spoke to an hiv support group yesterday who said if i was having symtoms i would definately know about it it would either be like glandualr fever or full blown flu i would not just be having mild on off symptoms and they would have all been at once... i am so scared and just dont know what to believe as reading so much conflicting evidence on internet.  can anyone please help with these symtoms are they anxiety or would they manifest at different times??
many thanks

Online Andy Velez

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Re: ars? worried sick
« Reply #1 on: April 29, 2011, 08:00:23 PM »
OK, let's calm things down here a bit.

You need to stop having unprotected intercourse. Until if and when you are in a securely monogamous relationship in which both parties have tested negative together at a reliable point, until then the guy has to wear a condom everytime. No exceptions.

There is nothing in anyway suggestive of HIV in your symptoms. But then neither the presence nor the absence of symptoms is ever the basis for reliably knowing your HIV status. Only an HIV test taken at 13 weeks after the most recent unprotected intercourse can give you that answer.

Since you've taken PEP, in order to test reliably you need to do it 13 weeks after the completion of PEP. And it should be an HIV specific test.

As for all of the emtional turmoil you are experiencing, we can't help you with that in this setting. See a therapist or other professional to get some support with sorting things out.

Good luck with your HIV test.
Andy Velez

Offline kank

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Re: ars? worried sick
« Reply #2 on: May 01, 2011, 06:43:53 AM »
i know that anxiety and stress can cause all these problems.  i have ben smoking recently and sore throat only appears when had a cig.  i spent all noght last night prodding poking looking in mirror and taking temp.  i feel like i am going crazy hubby thinks im having a nervous breakdown!! thank you for your support everyone. the test i had done yest was 4 weeks post pep and 2 weeks past last exposure would this still give a good indication if having true ars symptoms? when checking lymph nodescan barely feel ones inder jaw, cannot feel any in arm pits although this morning keep getting mild shooting pain in right arm pit and not sure if can feel any in groin found  tenderspot but not much swelling.  i am so going crazy!!  ??? ???

Offline Ann

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Re: ars? worried sick
« Reply #3 on: May 01, 2011, 07:47:54 AM »
Kank,

If you keep poking and prodding where your lymph nodes are, you going to make them swell. Leave them alone!

Symptoms or the lack of symptoms will never tell you a single thing about your hiv status. Only testing at the appropriate time will.

You need to test at three months post PEP for a conclusive result. Don't worry about the possible exposure while on PEP - the meds would have protected you.

As Andy said, you really need to wise up and start insisting on condoms. I'm amazed you continued having unprotected intercourse while on PEP. Please learn your lesson before it's too late!

Here's what you need to know in order to remain hiv negative:

You need to be using condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, every time, no exceptions until such time as you are in a securely monogamous relationship where you have both tested for ALL sexually transmitted infections together.

To agree to have unprotected intercourse is to consent to the possibility of being infected with an STI. Sex without a condom lasts only a matter of minutes, but hiv is forever.

Have a look through the condom and lube links in my signature line so you can use condoms with confidence.

Anyone who is sexually active should be having a full sexual health care check-up, including but not limited to hiv testing, at least once a year and more often if unprotected intercourse occurs.

If you aren't already having regular, routine check-ups, now is the time to start. As long as you make sure condoms are being used for intercourse, you can fully expect your routine hiv tests to return with negative results.

Don't forget to always get checked for all the other sexually transmitted infections as well, because they are MUCH easier to transmit than hiv.

Use condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, correctly and consistently, and you will avoid hiv infection. It really is that simple!

I removed the thread you started in the I Just Tested Poz forum. If you read the Welcome Thread before posting like you're supposed to, you will have read the following posting guideline:

Quote


With the exception of the “Am I Infected?” and “Off Topic” Forums, the AIDSmeds.com Forums are intended for people who have been diagnosed with HIV (or their loved ones/caregivers).  If you are questioning or unaware of your HIV status, please refrain from posting messages or questions in the Forums intended for HIV-positive people.


Please consider yourself warned!

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

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"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline kank

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Re: ars? worried sick
« Reply #4 on: May 05, 2011, 04:18:04 PM »
sorry i hadnt read the welcome thread hope i didn't cause any offence!!
well sorethroat now very mild but there only at night time very weird!! still waiting for results from last test getting very nervous

Offline kank

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Re: ars? worried sick
« Reply #5 on: May 15, 2011, 06:34:46 AM »
well the tests came back negative which gave me2 days of relief now i am strating worrying all over again!! i have stoped my pill on tues for my 7 day break and have had the mildest brown bleed for 1 day then nothing but spotting (TMI) and 1 bout of diarreah!! the worry starts again now and can feel the anxiety comming back.  i have 8 weeks to wait now but feel i can wait that long!! if i have a duo test at 6 weeks would this show hiv at this point/ give me an indication??

Offline Ann

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Re: ars? worried sick
« Reply #6 on: May 15, 2011, 08:52:49 AM »
Kank,

Having an odd period has no bearing on your hiv status. Periods like you describe are actually common when on the Pill - and the longer you're on the Pill, the more likely they are to happen like that. Stress can also cause changes in your period.

Stress can also cause diarrhea. Where do you think the phrase "shitting myself", when frightened or upset, came from?

If your GUM clinic will allow it, you can test at six weeks (or more) post PEP. As the vast majority of people who have actually been infected will seroconvert and test positive by this time, it will be a very good indication of your hiv status. A six week negative must be confirmed at the three month point, but is highly unlikely to change. You do not need to test over the unprotected intercourse you had while on PEP - the meds would have protected you.

Don't be surprised if your GUM clinic does not allow you to test again until the three month point. As I'm sure you're aware, the NHS is facing budgeting cuts and the GUM clinics in many areas have suffered due to this.

With that four week post PEP negative result, I fully expect you to continue to test negative. Keep yourself busy with other things - including having some fun (just not of the unprotected intercourse variety!) - and the time will go much more quickly than you might imagine.

Ann


edited for clarity
« Last Edit: May 15, 2011, 08:57:24 AM by Ann »
Condoms are a girl's best friend

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"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline kank

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Re: ars? worried sick
« Reply #7 on: May 15, 2011, 11:21:26 AM »
thanks ann for your response
i am going through up and downs at the mo one minute i am ok and happy the next totally shitting myself!!  ;)
i am starting to think stress i s the main thing here as as i start to stress my body gets very hot and face burns.  theblood was taken 3 weeks past last exposure but didn't get tested until nearly 4 weeks due to lab.  does the virus still replicate once blood taken?
thank you so much for your time and answers it is a real god send!!
xx

Offline Ann

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Re: ars? worried sick
« Reply #8 on: May 15, 2011, 11:37:54 AM »
Kank,

I'm not quite sure what you mean by "does the virus still replicate once blood taken?" but I'll have a stab at it.

If you are infected, the virus will continue to replicate no matter if blood tests are taken or not.

The blood tests used for hiv testing look for antibodies, not the virus itself. It generally takes two to four weeks for antibodies to be formed. When enough antibodies are formed (your body produces the antibodies in response to the presence of hiv) to trigger a positive - aka reactive - result, you are said to have seroconverted from hiv negative to hiv positive. Seroconversion means your blood (serum, or in this case, sero) has converted from hiv negative (no antibodies present) to hiv positive (antibodies present). The average time to seroconversion is only 22 days.

You still seem to be thinking you need to test for the unprotected intercourse you had while on PEP. YOU DO NOT. The meds you were taking would have protected you against infection, if you weren't already infected.

Here is an explanation of how PEP works...

PEP works the same as any other antiretroviral - it stops the virus from replicating, therefore suppressing it. If the medication succeeds in suppressing the virus before it gets into certain "reservoirs" where it can hide from the meds, then the virus can be successfully eradicated from the body. This is why there is a time limit on initiating PEP and why the sooner PEP is initiated, the better.

If the virus manages to get into and hide in the reservoirs, that may be enough to stimulate antibody production, but I'm not sure on that point. I don't think most experts are either, and this is why the generally accepted testing window following PEP is three months post PEP. When PEP is stopped where the virus has successfully hidden out in the reservoirs, the virus will begin to come back into the bloodstream and replicate, thereby stimulating a delayed antibody production. This seems to be the accepted theory.

I really do expect you to continue to test negative. You need to learn from this experience - please promise me you will do your utmost to make sure your partner is wearing a condom before he penetrates you. Keep your own supply of condoms with you at all times (carry some in your bag or coat pocket) so he doesn't have the excuse of not having one. If he refuses to wear one, tell him to get lost as he clearly only cares for his own pleasure and does not care about your well-being.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline kank

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Re: ars? worried sick
« Reply #9 on: May 15, 2011, 12:46:44 PM »
sorry ann i dont think i was clear on my post.  the blood taken was at 3 weeks but they didn' manage to test in the lab until the week after.  so in the test tube/ lab would the blood still replicate think what im trying to get at is if t is sat in the lab for a week would the antibodie still be forming outside of my body?
thanks for your reply

Offline Ann

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Re: ars? worried sick
« Reply #10 on: May 15, 2011, 01:06:51 PM »
Kank,

The blood in the test tube would not change while it was awaiting testing. It would still be a snapshot of what was going on on the day it was drawn.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline kank

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Re: ars? worried sick
« Reply #11 on: May 15, 2011, 01:10:58 PM »
ann
thanks for your response i will try and get a 6 week (in 2 weeks) to try and put my mind at ease... i cant believe what i have put myself through for a fling!! find myself trying to get more info out of ex by dropping odd questions i.e when you last gave blood etc.  all answers point to everything being ok just got myself into a state again!!! :-[
and temp rising as i type this must be anxiety!!!!!!
can i just say your replies have really helped me and many others im sure!!
will try and calm down we are going on holiday thursday for a week so thats one down where i will not be thinking blood tests and symptoms.
many thanks again

Offline Ann

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Re: ars? worried sick
« Reply #12 on: May 15, 2011, 01:22:52 PM »
Kank,

You're welcome.

And yes, stress can cause you to feel flushed or as though your temperature has gone up. Get busy with other things - and have fun on holiday - and the time will fly by.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline kank

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Re: ars? worried sick
« Reply #13 on: May 15, 2011, 01:30:55 PM »
ann  my temp is rising cos i have a new addiction of sticking the themometre in my ear.. although think i am sticking it too far in as ear sore now ha ha!!
when this is all over and opefully i get the negative i am dreaming of i am going to take myself into a room and slap myself silly for being so stupid! i will also have a more educated knowlede of the virus and will always look at it in a different light and have the up most respect for the people living their everyday lives fully whilst having to deal with the stereotypes etc that comes with it!! make me feel like a stupid nuerotic idiot that i am so hung up on myself and symptoms that may and are likely to lead to nothing!!!
thanks again will surely post again but will try to stay calm!!
xx

Offline kank

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Re: ars? worried sick
« Reply #14 on: June 04, 2011, 03:14:30 AM »
well 6 weeks 7 days now was nice and relaxed up to the other day.  i have been checking lymph nodes under jaw and think they are swollen i can feel them hardish when press lightly but not seen obviously.  the front of myneck aches and i have been having very soft (not diarreah as such) i am freaking again now too scared to get tested for a 7 week reassurance.  arms legs and shoulders mildly ache.  would seroconversion still happen at this time? have asked the ex to test but says pointlss as he give blood 4 monthly and last one in feb.  is he lying is he telling the truth i dont know but he is still in contact.  after last exposure a day later he had a virus of some kind aching legs visiting toilet alot and very tired which lasted 5 days.  thats all i keep thinking about was he seroconverting then? did he seroconvert in dec when had flu .... yep im going back into paranoid mode!! :((

Online Andy Velez

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Re: ars? worried sick
« Reply #15 on: June 04, 2011, 08:24:55 AM »
All of your so-called symptoms are totallly irrelevant in terms of your HIV concerns. None of them are in anyway HIV specific. And ARS would not go on for the extended period you are reporting.

You'll be testing shortly and nothing you are reporting leads me to expect a positive result.
Andy Velez

Offline kank

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Re: ars? worried sick
« Reply #16 on: June 05, 2011, 12:04:56 PM »
andy
thanks for the reply i am getting myself all worked up and hopefully for no reason. 
will try and calm down and ride out the next 5 weeks til my 12 wk test.  does it matter a few days earlier or does it have to be 12 weeks exactly or over?? the hospital do same day testing which is on a thursday and was trying to establish whether i could have this 11 wk 4 days or should wait til week after
many thanks

Online Andy Velez

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Re: ars? worried sick
« Reply #17 on: June 05, 2011, 01:45:16 PM »
I suggest you do this as close to the 12 week mark as you can. That way when you test negative you won't have any reason to doubt the accuracy of the result. You are a worrier and I can easily imagine you wondering maybe you should have waited a few more days.
Andy Velez

Offline kank

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Re: ars? worried sick
« Reply #18 on: June 06, 2011, 02:57:43 AM »
it must be more obvious than i think yes i am a terrible worrier have been poking all night on my neck and now regret it cos the node are getting sore.  i do this about everything alsways look at the worst possible scenario....
i will book my 12 week at 12 wk 1 day and not before think i will stay away from testing until then because although i will have a few days of ease up will start thinking what if topo early and start again!!! (that is if i can stay away from tests!!!)
just a quick question about the nodes would they all swell or be localised???
many thanks

Online Andy Velez

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Re: ars? worried sick
« Reply #19 on: June 06, 2011, 08:51:36 AM »
Leave your lymph nodes alone! Really! If they are swollen you should discuss them with your doctor. We can't diagnose anything in this setting and we don't get into guessing about causes of symptoms.

Good luck with your test.
Andy Velez

Offline kank

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Re: ars? worried sick
« Reply #20 on: June 07, 2011, 03:03:19 PM »
thank you
i am unsure what to do whether to have test earlier just to ease mind or have 5 weeks of notknowing.  today my leags at groin ache and get sharpe pains shooting.  i have now a crawling/ pins and needles sensation over body especially hand and back. can this be related to hiv?

Offline Ann

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Re: ars? worried sick
« Reply #21 on: June 08, 2011, 06:54:26 AM »
Kank,

You should know by now that we do not discuss symptoms here, as they are meaningless when it comes to diagnosing hiv. If you're worried about anything going on with your body, go see a doctor.

Any test at or past six weeks would be a very good indication of your hiv status. The vast majority of people who have actually been infected will seroconvert and test positive by the six week point. A six week (or more) negative is highly unlikely to change, but must be confirmed at the three month point.

It is unclear whether or not you ever went for the six week test you said you were going for. If you did and it was negative, there is no point in testing again until the three months are up, as a six week negative is highly unlikely to change.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline kank

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Re: ars? worried sick
« Reply #22 on: June 08, 2011, 02:33:47 PM »
ann
i know just got myself into a state and am silly for keep asking the same questions knowing that they cant be answered.
well i went for finger prick test today 7 weeks 3 days and it was negative!!!!!!! i am so relieved i can actually start to believe there is a light at the end of this long black tunnel i have put myself in!!!
i have a question regarding condoms.  i had protected sex last night with condom when pulled out it was very wet checked and no breakage is this normal and will i/ him still be protected.. you can tell i dont use them often!!!!
also oral was performed but without condom this is a no risk situation isn't it?
many thanks

Online Andy Velez

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Re: ars? worried sick
« Reply #23 on: June 08, 2011, 05:48:12 PM »
You used a condom. That's exactly what you are supposed to do. They are very effective for protecting you against HIV.

And receiving is absolutely not a risk for HIV transmission. Period.
Andy Velez

Offline kank

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Re: ars? worried sick
« Reply #24 on: June 09, 2011, 02:28:04 AM »
thanks everyone for your advise and patience with me i will await the 12 week test and fingers crossed will be negative!! any little ache or pain/  ulcer or sore throat i get from now on i will not try and diagnose as hiv!!
thanks again for your help

Offline Ann

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Re: ars? worried sick
« Reply #25 on: June 09, 2011, 08:47:13 AM »
Kank,

A condom being wet is absolutely normal and you were both protected. In fact, when it comes to condoms, the wetter, the better. Condoms can break when there isn't enough lubrication. Make sure you read through the condom and lube links in my signature line so you can use them with confidence.

I really do not expect your seven week, three day negative to change when you confirm it at the three month point.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline kank

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Re: ars? worried sick
« Reply #26 on: June 13, 2011, 10:45:45 AM »
thanks ann for all your advise now going to stay away from threads, internet searches etc and await my 12 week final test.  again many thanks you have all been a great help and very very patient with me!!! ::)

 


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