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Author Topic: New Poz  (Read 2934 times)

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Offline klouny

  • Member
  • Posts: 142
  • ~ can you see me now~
New Poz
« on: March 30, 2011, 12:40:06 AM »
just recently found out I was positive (no lie, found out this month)
so far. .
I am dealing fairly well with the news of my seroconversion. I have a GREAT, AMAZING group of friends who are supporting me at the moment, and helping me get through this. I did pass a couple of days with fear, depression. but for the most part I have come to terms with it ( or at least I think I have)
I have yet to start meds, I need to talk to a doctor ( I see my doc next week),  they just seem to LOVE taking out blood though :(
most of my questions about HIV have been answered, in a clinical manner. I know the "book" definition about the disease and what I can expect. Ive heard from TONS of people that it's not a "death sentence", and those are things I already knew. most of the things I have questions about are the things to expects from everyday life, but I guess I can answer those myself through my own experiences. just taking this a day at a time.
one of the case workers at the health department and a friend told me about this site, so I thought I'd check it out. and saw that everyone on here ( through their posts) has experienced what I have in the early stages and first few months of finding out. and I also see all the people who have lived with this for years, and I am not too scared about it.
I think that life puts a lot of challanges in our path in order to see how well we will fare with those challanges and how we will overcome them. I dont see this diagnosis as a "game over", but rather as a new start for myself. I am young, and though this is not something I had necessarily wanted or planned. I think this might help me grow more into a better person somehow.
~Strange ideas are Superfluous and unoriginal~

Offline SunnyFlorida

  • Member
  • Posts: 176
Re: New Poz
« Reply #1 on: March 30, 2011, 12:52:52 AM »
Hey... Welcome! Finally dragged you here. ;) Of course, I wish it was under better circumstances but from what I've seen, you're in good company here! Hope this forum helps you as much as it's helped me to help you, man. From the time we've spent together over the past couple months, I can tell that you're much stronger than you give yourself credit for!

Nicely put in the last paragraph, that is an excellent attitude to have. As I told you weeks ago, life is what you make of it and I'm glad that you're not allowing HIV to define who you are!

Offline OzJock28

  • Member
  • Posts: 12
Re: New Poz
« Reply #2 on: March 30, 2011, 01:05:04 AM »
Welcome to the forums, I only wish it was under better circumstances.

We share a very similar experience with both the diagnosis and acceptance with ourselves and others
acceptance of us.

I wish you all the best on your new journey and from your post I can see your in control of where your going.

Offline klouny

  • Member
  • Posts: 142
  • ~ can you see me now~
Re: New Poz
« Reply #3 on: March 30, 2011, 01:12:38 AM »
Welcome to the forums, I only wish it was under better circumstances.

We share a very similar experience with both the diagnosis and acceptance with ourselves and others
acceptance of us.

I wish you all the best on your new journey and from your post I can see your in control of where your going.

Thank you, yes I am trying to take as much control of it as I can at the moment.
like I said, taking it one day at a time. and not trying to rush things.
I'm glad to hear you've had a somewhat good experience with this as well, both in accepting yourself and getting acceptance from others. I know that is making a world of difference to me right now
~Strange ideas are Superfluous and unoriginal~

Offline spacebarsux

  • Member
  • Posts: 1,350
  • Survival of the Fittest
Re: New Poz
« Reply #4 on: March 30, 2011, 02:16:15 AM »
Welcome to the forums Klouny!

I was diagnosed 2months ago and haven't revealed my status to anyone (other than my partner yet). So you see, you are already a few steps ahead of me in forming your support group of friends so quickly. I am sure you'll handle it just fine.

And I agree with you 100%  about the diagnosis being a challenge or obstacle and not "game over".
Infected-  2005 or early 2006; Diagnosed- Jan 28th, 2011; Feb '11- CD4 754 @34%, VL- 39K; July '11- CD4 907@26%,  VL-81K; Feb '12- CD4 713 @31%, VL- 41K, Nov '12- CD4- 827@31%

Offline DanMo

  • Member
  • Posts: 235
  • Finally undetectable! ;D
Re: New Poz
« Reply #5 on: March 30, 2011, 11:13:39 AM »
Hey Klouny!

Welcome to the forums, but so sorry you even have to be here! I found out this month too (March 14). I've gone through the whole roller-coaster of emotions as well.

Taking it one day at a time is a good step. If you start to over analyze things and over worry, you'll fill your head with a bunch of crap that probably won't even happen.

Just remember that when you're looking over the internet, that people always complain about problems that they are having. You rarely see people online talking about the good stuff in their lives. It's the same with HIV... you'll always find the horror stories online and not necessarily hear about how well people are doing.

What I've noticed with this forum is that people tend to post about how good their health is going so that balances stuff out!

Dan
“I tried to drown my sorrows, but the bastards learned how to swim, and now I am overwhelmed by this decent and good feeling.” —Frida Kahlo

11 Feb 2011 - Preliminary positive
07 Mar 11 - Inconclusive WB
14 Mar 11 - Diagnosed positive
05 Apr 11 - 355 (21%) / VL: 186,054
27 Apr 11 - 390 (20%) / VL: 285,095
06 Jun 11 - 298 (19%) / VL:  78,380
01 Aug 11 - > STARTED ATRIPLA <
30 Aug 11 - 699 (31%) / VL: 1,938
03 Nov 11 -                / VL: 645
27 Dec 11 - 559 (35%) / VL: 1,189
11 Jan 12 -                 / VL: <20
09 Apr 12 - 686 (40%) / VL: UD
11 Jul 12 - 793 (37%) / VL: 25

Offline klouny

  • Member
  • Posts: 142
  • ~ can you see me now~
Re: New Poz
« Reply #6 on: March 30, 2011, 12:51:22 PM »
Welcome to the forums Klouny!

I was diagnosed 2months ago and haven't revealed my status to anyone (other than my partner yet). So you see, you are already a few steps ahead of me in forming your support group of friends so quickly. I am sure you'll handle it just fine.

And I agree with you 100%  about the diagnosis being a challenge or obstacle and not "game over".

thanks for reading my post :), like I said I have a wonderful support group that has helped me get through it so far. I sort of felt the need to let some close friends know about my status; I've gotten a myriad of responses. but for the most part they've been very supportive .
and nope, this isn't a game over, I've just begun to play the game.
~Strange ideas are Superfluous and unoriginal~

Offline klouny

  • Member
  • Posts: 142
  • ~ can you see me now~
Re: New Poz
« Reply #7 on: March 30, 2011, 12:56:26 PM »
Hey Klouny!

Welcome to the forums, but so sorry you even have to be here! I found out this month too (March 14). I've gone through the whole roller-coaster of emotions as well.

Dan

hey Dan, so it seems we got on the same boat at the same time. sorry you're here as well, but what can you do. live and learn, right?
taking it a day at the time, that's always how I take things in life.
and yes; I am not believing everything I see online. there are some things on here just for shock value, others are real things. but I am not overthinking things too much, that will get me nowhere other than in bed  with a headache
~Strange ideas are Superfluous and unoriginal~

Offline Joe K

  • Global Moderator
  • Member
  • Posts: 3,661
  • 31 Years Poz
Re: New Poz
« Reply #8 on: March 31, 2011, 06:01:27 PM »
I think that life puts a lot of challanges in our path in order to see how well we will fare with those challanges and how we will overcome them. I dont see this diagnosis as a "game over", but rather as a new start for myself. I am young, and though this is not something I had necessarily wanted or planned. I think this might help me grow more into a better person somehow.

HIV will not help you grow into a better person, only you can do that and given what you have said, you will have no problem adjusting to your new status.  You appear to have a good grasp on what being poz will mean for you and that is half the battle.  Perspective and attitude will serve you well in life, but ultimately it always comes down to who you are, what you believe and how badly you want something.  You have an excellent start on the rest of your life, so sit back, take it slow and enjoy.

Offline klouny

  • Member
  • Posts: 142
  • ~ can you see me now~
Re: New Poz
« Reply #9 on: April 02, 2011, 07:37:46 PM »
Killfoile

so far I haven't had too many problems adjusting to my status ( I have GREAT friends helping me with the transition), there is not much I can do about it anyways so might as well try to take the smart road.

I guess I miscommunicated what I was trying to say; being positive won't make me a better person, but learning from this lesson hopefully will make me a wiser person in the future. it was a harsh lesson, but a lesson I must learn from nonetheless.

I agree with your comment as well; it does all come down to who you are, your beliefs, and how badly you want it. I want to be there when the vaccine is found, heck I want to help with a vaccine study.

I am not rushing it, taking it one day at a time. but enjoying those wonderful 24 hours the best way I can
~Strange ideas are Superfluous and unoriginal~

 


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