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Author Topic: A positive, positive thread  (Read 17330 times)

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Offline Hellraiser

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Re: A positive, positive thread
« Reply #50 on: February 19, 2011, 02:01:30 AM »
Its all in the way you want to see it I suppose . I see JK post as a sensitive and insightful one .  

I agree for the most part, except that he called the people who agreed with him grown ups, which implies that those who disagree with him are juvenile.

Offline jkinatl2

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Re: A positive, positive thread
« Reply #51 on: February 19, 2011, 02:03:01 AM »

Point made over and over again. Not everyone is in agreement.


No, it makes them fucking dangerous. It makes people spread this virus. It makes people ignore it. It makes people (sorry to be mean here) like yourself remain totally ignorant of it until you have it, and even then make the already steep learning curve more difficult than it has to be because you seem convinced that you know it all, until the very next speed bump. And from your posts, they seem to be coming up at a pace fast enough to question your efforts to understand the thing inside you, the thing that will indeed kill you if it gets the upper hand.

Whatever, you guys hold hands and sing prevention efforts into oblivion. HIV is nothing. Its a pill, given for free, and no one needs to fear it or prevent it or protect against it. If I seem mean and bitter, it is because people like you guys are indirectly responsible for the spread of this thing.

Because a difference that makes no difference IS no difference, right?

We have forums on this site for spirituality, for alternative meds, and an active off-topic section for those who want to talk about other things. This ONE forum, aside from the restricted Positive Women's and LTS forums, is where we discuss HIV.

Report my posts if they seem disruptive. Get me canned if they seem destructive. I certainly find these rose-colored viewpoints destructive IN THIS FORUM, TO this forum.

Also, I don't know it all. I only know what I know. And even that, I leave open to new information.

Sad, because we could have been friends. At any rate, I hope you do not ignore the voices that could save your halth and your life.


"Many people, especially in the gay community, turn to oral sex as a safer alternative in the age of AIDS. And with HIV rates rising, people need to remember that oral sex is safer sex. It's a reasonable alternative."

-Kimberly Page-Shafer, PhD, MPH

Welcome Thread

Offline drewm

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Re: A positive, positive thread
« Reply #52 on: February 19, 2011, 02:03:41 AM »
@jkinatl2 What I am reading here tonight does not, exactly, make me feel all warm and fuzzy about you. It just doesn't. Different people have tried, in earnest, to explain themselves all day and have been derided, name called, baited and God only knows what else. I can feel your negativity in your posts, your preaching your point of view refusing to listen to anyone else's or give it any merit.

Have a heart man! Yeah, we are all adults (or at least I think so) but not everyone has experienced life as you have NOR SHOULD THEY. If you can listen to what others are saying about THEIR OWN PERSONAL experiences and how they see THEIR OWN LIFE without correcting and admonishing them for their own personal views and feelings you will gain a lot of ground.

As I told you before, I came here to offer up my own experiences. Granted, they are not as lengthy as some of you fine folks on here BUT THEY ARE JUST AS VALID because I own this F***ING VIRUS just as much as you do. I wish I didn't but the hand of fate has brought me here. I am also asking questions and learning from some folks. I don't have all the answers, hell, I don't even have the questions yet that I think I should but your viscous attempts to call people down like grade schoolers is hardly encouraging to anyone.
Diagnosed in  May of 2010 with teh AIDS.

PCP Pneumonia . CD4 8 . VL 500,000

ATRIPLA - VALTREX -  FLUOXETINE - FENOFIBRATE


Numbers consistent since 12/2010 - VL has remained undetectable and CD4 is anywhere from 275-325

Online Jeff G

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Re: A positive, positive thread
« Reply #53 on: February 19, 2011, 02:16:08 AM »
I agree for the most part, except that he called the people who agreed with him grown ups, which implies that those who disagree with him are juvenile.

Jk is one of the most informative and sincere people we have on the boards here , he hasnt done a thing but state his opinion just like the rest of you so get off the cross guys .

Offline jkinatl2

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Re: A positive, positive thread
« Reply #54 on: February 19, 2011, 02:16:47 AM »
If my posts are vicious, then I need to leave.
"Many people, especially in the gay community, turn to oral sex as a safer alternative in the age of AIDS. And with HIV rates rising, people need to remember that oral sex is safer sex. It's a reasonable alternative."

-Kimberly Page-Shafer, PhD, MPH

Welcome Thread

Offline Matty the Damned

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Re: A positive, positive thread
« Reply #55 on: February 19, 2011, 02:16:55 AM »
@jkinatl2 I am still reading and re-reading what you have said and no matter how many times I decipher it, it always comes across the same. Your post is mean and bitter and you come across as all-knowing. Maybe you are but your presentation is likely welcomed by those afraid to take you on but derided by those of us who aren't living in life's gutter.

Instead of coming across as an LTS know it all (which is how you sound) why don't you listen.

You said, "you have shown no evidence that the organic manifestation of HIV does any more to bring positivity into someone's life than any other tragedy." Who, exactly, said it did? Where did you read this?

And then you said, "you have come across a forum of grownups. Life is hard. Life is also joyous. We make the joy worth the pain each day, until it no longer does. HIV has not dictated ONE SINGLE POSITIVE THING in my life.

Point made over and over again. Not everyone is in agreement. That doesn't make them wrong and you, being human, hardly have all the answers. Your tone is apparent, no clarification needed.


Well Drew, you're hardly lacking with the i-know-more-than-god tone yourself. Difference between you and Jonathan is that he has the life experience to carry such a tone and you, to be blunt, do not.

You seem like a nice guy, but in your haste to have your say you're missing the point, I think.

MtD

Offline Hellraiser

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Re: A positive, positive thread
« Reply #56 on: February 19, 2011, 02:23:19 AM »
Alright last post to this thread.  The difference is, Drew and Kelly aren't saying you're wrong only that they disagree.  The rest of ya are saying "No no it can't be the way you say it is, you are completely and totally wrong" and refusing to see the reason of their arguments.  Take that for what it's worth.  I'm out.

Online Jeff G

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Re: A positive, positive thread
« Reply #57 on: February 19, 2011, 02:26:21 AM »
Alright last post to this thread.  The difference is, Drew and Kelly aren't saying you're wrong only that they disagree.  The rest of ya are saying "No no it can't be the way you say it is, you are completely and totally wrong" and refusing to see the reason of their arguments.  Take that for what it's worth.  I'm out.

Goodnight   :-\

Offline Matty the Damned

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Re: A positive, positive thread
« Reply #58 on: February 19, 2011, 02:28:34 AM »
Alright last post to this thread.  The difference is, Drew and Kelly aren't saying you're wrong only that they disagree.  The rest of ya are saying "No no it can't be the way you say it is, you are completely and totally wrong" and refusing to see the reason of their arguments.  Take that for what it's worth.  I'm out.

Again that isn't what we're saying, but you know that.

JK quite astutely puts to various tests the assertion that "HIV can be a positive force in one's life". Others of us suggest that the irrepressibly cheerful Tony Robbins fuelled "you can make your own success!" undertones to some of this stuff is in fact Not A Wise Approach regarding HIV.

Whether people agree with this or not is obviously a matter for them.

The fact that it upsets some people is not a reason to bite one's tongue.

MtD

Offline jkinatl2

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Re: A positive, positive thread
« Reply #59 on: February 19, 2011, 02:30:02 AM »
Congrats Drewm. You managed to really wound me tonight. I wrote from my heart, which is apparently mean and bitter. I told stories of my friend who is at real risk of ruin from this virus. I wrote of my own painful experiences. I wrote of my own growth and my own pain.

And you called it preachy and mean and bitter.

So there ya go. The Positive Positive thread in a forum marked "Living With HIV." I hope it made you feel better.

"Many people, especially in the gay community, turn to oral sex as a safer alternative in the age of AIDS. And with HIV rates rising, people need to remember that oral sex is safer sex. It's a reasonable alternative."

-Kimberly Page-Shafer, PhD, MPH

Welcome Thread

Offline drewm

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Re: A positive, positive thread
« Reply #60 on: February 19, 2011, 02:30:48 AM »
No, it makes them fucking dangerous. It makes people spread this virus. It makes people ignore it. It makes people (sorry to be mean here) like yourself remain totally ignorant of it until you have it, and even then make the already steep learning curve more difficult than it has to be because you seem convinced that you know it all, until the very next speed bump. And from your posts, they seem to be coming up at a pace fast enough to question your efforts to understand the thing inside you, the thing that will indeed kill you if it gets the upper hand.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Herein lies the problem. You are the know it all. I don't have the answers or even all the questions but your assumptions about me are way off mark. Not surprising though, you haven't LISTENED yet. Yeah, my posts do come fast because I am firm in what I believe and you are simply repeating, ad-nauseaum, the same things over and over.

You think I don't know this virus will kill me? Really? That's your take because I refuse to crawl down into your hole and wallow in your misery? I am currently on one hell of a rebound thanks to Atripla and an aggressive TEAM of doctors who grabbed this bitch by the throat and helped to reverse some horrid numbers. But since I don't walk around with a skull and cross-bones tatooed on my forehead preaching gloom and doom, I am the enemy? You are delusional.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Whatever, you guys hold hands and sing prevention efforts into oblivion. HIV is nothing. Its a pill, given for free, and no one needs to fear it or prevent it or protect against it. If I seem mean and bitter, it is because people like you guys are indirectly responsible for the spread of this thing.

You really believe that? And you base this on positive life experiences, being hopeful, taking advantage of what life we have? Really??????

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Report my posts if they seem disruptive. Get me canned if they seem destructive. I certainly find these rose-colored viewpoints destructive IN THIS FORUM, TO this forum.


No doubt about that. You find life destructive unless it fits in your end of the world mantra.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Also, I don't know it all. I only know what I know. And even that, I leave open to new information. Sad, because we could have been friends. At any rate, I hope you do not ignore the voices that could save your halth and your life.

Just a couple of thoughts. You come across as a know it all. What you know could probably be beneficial No, it couldn't because you cannot listen to another opinion without horrendous accusations, blame and nonsense and belittling others. Your assumptions about me are proof that you think you have a grasp on me. YOU DON'T...AT ALL. You're observations are not even close but rather than listen and make your points in a less accusatory, blame leveling, way you come across as a jerk. FYI the voices that can save my life were a team of doctors and my current ID doc that can talk to me about the upsides and downsides without coming across as a jerk.
Diagnosed in  May of 2010 with teh AIDS.

PCP Pneumonia . CD4 8 . VL 500,000

ATRIPLA - VALTREX -  FLUOXETINE - FENOFIBRATE


Numbers consistent since 12/2010 - VL has remained undetectable and CD4 is anywhere from 275-325

Offline Matty the Damned

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Re: A positive, positive thread
« Reply #61 on: February 19, 2011, 02:34:22 AM »
No, it makes them fucking dangerous. It makes people spread this virus. It makes people ignore it. It makes people (sorry to be mean here) like yourself remain totally ignorant of it until you have it, and even then make the already steep learning curve more difficult than it has to be because you seem convinced that you know it all, until the very next speed bump. And from your posts, they seem to be coming up at a pace fast enough to question your efforts to understand the thing inside you, the thing that will indeed kill you if it gets the upper hand.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Herein lies the problem. You are the know it all. I don't have the answers or even all the questions but your assumptions about me are way off mark. Not surprising though, you haven't LISTENED yet. Yeah, my posts do come fast because I am firm in what I believe and you are simply repeating, ad-nauseaum, the same things over and over.

You think I don't know this virus will kill me? Really? That's your take because I refuse to crawl down into your hole and wallow in your misery? I am currently on one hell of a rebound thanks to Atripla and an aggressive TEAM of doctors who grabbed this bitch by the throat and helped to reverse some horrid numbers. But since I don't walk around with a skull and cross-bones tatooed on my forehead preaching gloom and doom, I am the enemy? You are delusional.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Whatever, you guys hold hands and sing prevention efforts into oblivion. HIV is nothing. Its a pill, given for free, and no one needs to fear it or prevent it or protect against it. If I seem mean and bitter, it is because people like you guys are indirectly responsible for the spread of this thing.

You really believe that? And you base this on positive life experiences, being hopeful, taking advantage of what life we have? Really??????

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Report my posts if they seem disruptive. Get me canned if they seem destructive. I certainly find these rose-colored viewpoints destructive IN THIS FORUM, TO this forum.


No doubt about that. You find life destructive unless it fits in your end of the world mantra.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Also, I don't know it all. I only know what I know. And even that, I leave open to new information. Sad, because we could have been friends. At any rate, I hope you do not ignore the voices that could save your halth and your life.

Just a couple of thoughts. You come across as a know it all. What you know could probably be beneficial No, it couldn't because you cannot listen to another opinion without horrendous accusations, blame and nonsense and belittling others. Your assumptions about me are proof that you think you have a grasp on me. YOU DON'T...AT ALL. You're observations are not even close but rather than listen and make your points in a less accusatory, blame leveling, way you come across as a jerk. FYI the voices that can save my life were a team of doctors and my current ID doc that can talk to me about the upsides and downsides without coming across as a jerk.

Seriously Drew, yer way off the mark with this crap you're tipping on JK. Dial it back before you regret it.

MtD

Online Jeff G

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  • How am I doing Beren ?
Re: A positive, positive thread
« Reply #62 on: February 19, 2011, 02:39:03 AM »
No, it makes them fucking dangerous. It makes people spread this virus. It makes people ignore it. It makes people (sorry to be mean here) like yourself remain totally ignorant of it until you have it, and even then make the already steep learning curve more difficult than it has to be because you seem convinced that you know it all, until the very next speed bump. And from your posts, they seem to be coming up at a pace fast enough to question your efforts to understand the thing inside you, the thing that will indeed kill you if it gets the upper hand.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Herein lies the problem. You are the know it all. I don't have the answers or even all the questions but your assumptions about me are way off mark. Not surprising though, you haven't LISTENED yet. Yeah, my posts do come fast because I am firm in what I believe and you are simply repeating, ad-nauseaum, the same things over and over.

You think I don't know this virus will kill me? Really? That's your take because I refuse to crawl down into your hole and wallow in your misery? I am currently on one hell of a rebound thanks to Atripla and an aggressive TEAM of doctors who grabbed this bitch by the throat and helped to reverse some horrid numbers. But since I don't walk around with a skull and cross-bones tatooed on my forehead preaching gloom and doom, I am the enemy? You are delusional.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Whatever, you guys hold hands and sing prevention efforts into oblivion. HIV is nothing. Its a pill, given for free, and no one needs to fear it or prevent it or protect against it. If I seem mean and bitter, it is because people like you guys are indirectly responsible for the spread of this thing.

You really believe that? And you base this on positive life experiences, being hopeful, taking advantage of what life we have? Really??????

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Report my posts if they seem disruptive. Get me canned if they seem destructive. I certainly find these rose-colored viewpoints destructive IN THIS FORUM, TO this forum.


No doubt about that. You find life destructive unless it fits in your end of the world mantra.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Also, I don't know it all. I only know what I know. And even that, I leave open to new information. Sad, because we could have been friends. At any rate, I hope you do not ignore the voices that could save your halth and your life.

Just a couple of thoughts. You come across as a know it all. What you know could probably be beneficial No, it couldn't because you cannot listen to another opinion without horrendous accusations, blame and nonsense and belittling others. Your assumptions about me are proof that you think you have a grasp on me. YOU DON'T...AT ALL. You're observations are not even close but rather than listen and make your points in a less accusatory, blame leveling, way you come across as a jerk. FYI the voices that can save my life were a team of doctors and my current ID doc that can talk to me about the upsides and downsides without coming across as a jerk.

Hey drew ... please just let it go tonight ... you are way off and out of bounds with this .

Offline jkinatl2

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Re: A positive, positive thread
« Reply #63 on: February 19, 2011, 02:47:38 AM »
this has certainly done nothing to convince me that those espousing positivity at the reliquishing of reality are some of the meanest, angriest people in the world.

Damn, Drewm. You try to hurt and you succeed. Good job. Well done.

"Many people, especially in the gay community, turn to oral sex as a safer alternative in the age of AIDS. And with HIV rates rising, people need to remember that oral sex is safer sex. It's a reasonable alternative."

-Kimberly Page-Shafer, PhD, MPH

Welcome Thread

Offline komnaes

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Re: A positive, positive thread
« Reply #64 on: February 19, 2011, 03:00:46 AM »
It's interesting to me that talking to the "positive" positive folks here and in my support group is almost like talking to some Christians' "God makes me a better person" argument while you're trying to engage them on a conversation whether believing in yahweh is delusional.

The point is - why does it take believing in an nonexistent bearded vindictive being in order for someone to be that better person that s/he claims s/he is because of his/her religion? Can't you just be that better person without this belief?

Applying to HIV, I hear some of us saying "oh, now I live everyday fully", "now I take care of myself better", "I have a closer relationship with my parents", etc... that's fine, but then my question is, why does it have to take catching a deadly virus that needs toxic pills to keep the bugs from killing you for you to do all those "positive" things and attain that "positive" attitude on life? Why can't you do it or couldn't you have done it WITHOUT it?

And even if you can't see yourself doing all those "positive" things now if it isn't for the fact that you're diagnosed, can you rule out somewhere down the line of your life you could still be able to do them without being HIV+?

Not sure about you.. I would much rather still be HIV- and to hold this "positive" thought that I could still be a "better" person without this pet virus that I am hosting...
Aug 07 Diagnosed
Oct 07 CD4=446(19%) Feb 08 CD4=421(19%)
Jun 08 CD4=325(22%) Jul 08 CD4=301(18%)
Sep 08 CD4=257/VL=75,000 Oct 08 CD4=347(16%)
Dec 08 CD4=270(16%)
Jan 09 CD4=246(13%)/VL=10,000
Feb 09 CD4=233(15%)/VL=13,000
Started meds Sustiva/Epzicom
May 09 CD4=333(24%)/VL=650
Aug 09 CD4=346(24%)/VL=UD
Nov 09 CD4=437(26%)/VL=UD
Feb 10 CD4=471(31%)/VL=UD
June 10 CD4=517 (28%)/VL=UD
Sept 10 CD4=687 (31%)/VL=UD
Jan 11 CD4=557 (30%)/VL=UD
April 11 CD4=569 (32%)/VL=UD
Switched to Epizcom, Reyataz and Norvir
(Interrupted for 2 months with only Epizcom & Reyataz)
July 11 CD=520 (28%)/VL=UD
Oct 11 CD=771 (31%)/VL=UD(<30)
April 12 CD=609 (28%)/VL=UD(<20)
Aug 12 CD=657 (29%)/VL=UD(<20)
Dec 12 CD=532 (31%)/VL=UD(<20)
May 13 CD=567 (31%)/VL=UD(<20)
Jan 14 CD=521 (21%)/VL=UD(<50)

Offline skeebo1969

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Re: A positive, positive thread
« Reply #65 on: February 19, 2011, 03:12:08 AM »
Why can't you do it or couldn't you have done it WITHOUT it?

Well, we will never be able to do it without it so we preach about doing it with it..  Perhaps for some it was the driving force to do it now rather than later.  What's so hard to understand?   ::)

I'm still mystified about the topic of arguement here... So, if you're happy and you know it shut the fuck up??  Am I reading it right?
I despise the song Love is in the Air, you should too.

Offline komnaes

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Re: A positive, positive thread
« Reply #66 on: February 19, 2011, 03:31:30 AM »
Well, we will never be able to do it without it so we preach about doing it with it..  Perhaps for some it was the driving force to do it now rather than later.  What's so hard to understand?   ::)

It is hard to understand, or it isn't. That's point really. If you're among the unlucky few that struggle with your health and side effects despite all the new treatment options, isn't that too high a price to pay for all those supposed beliefs that you have become a better person because of HIV? If it's indeed as easy as taking a pill a night for you now, good for you and nothing's wrong with that, but why coming here and telling those that have suffered horribly in many cases for years to be cheering for you..

I'm still mystified about the topic of arguement here... So, if you're happy and you know it shut the fuck up??  Am I reading it right?

Don't you think it's the other way round? Look at the OP - "everyone to just tell us of something positive", the operative word being "just", now you tell me who's telling who to shut the fuck up?
Aug 07 Diagnosed
Oct 07 CD4=446(19%) Feb 08 CD4=421(19%)
Jun 08 CD4=325(22%) Jul 08 CD4=301(18%)
Sep 08 CD4=257/VL=75,000 Oct 08 CD4=347(16%)
Dec 08 CD4=270(16%)
Jan 09 CD4=246(13%)/VL=10,000
Feb 09 CD4=233(15%)/VL=13,000
Started meds Sustiva/Epzicom
May 09 CD4=333(24%)/VL=650
Aug 09 CD4=346(24%)/VL=UD
Nov 09 CD4=437(26%)/VL=UD
Feb 10 CD4=471(31%)/VL=UD
June 10 CD4=517 (28%)/VL=UD
Sept 10 CD4=687 (31%)/VL=UD
Jan 11 CD4=557 (30%)/VL=UD
April 11 CD4=569 (32%)/VL=UD
Switched to Epizcom, Reyataz and Norvir
(Interrupted for 2 months with only Epizcom & Reyataz)
July 11 CD=520 (28%)/VL=UD
Oct 11 CD=771 (31%)/VL=UD(<30)
April 12 CD=609 (28%)/VL=UD(<20)
Aug 12 CD=657 (29%)/VL=UD(<20)
Dec 12 CD=532 (31%)/VL=UD(<20)
May 13 CD=567 (31%)/VL=UD(<20)
Jan 14 CD=521 (21%)/VL=UD(<50)

Offline anniebc

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Re: A positive, positive thread
« Reply #67 on: February 19, 2011, 05:10:02 AM »
Quoted from drewm:

Quote
you are simply repeating, ad-nauseaum, the same things over and over.


Really!!...and why do you think that is?..well let me tell you why, it's because he cares and continues to care about the idiots who won't listen to him..he is constantly hopeful that one day they will listen, and learn from his experience..and then you turn up and talk to him like that..how fucking dare you, you would never have survive what JK and all the other LTS went through because you lack the strength and courage they have.

And this little gem:

Quote
I refuse to crawl down into your hole and wallow in your misery?

I'm lost for words, what a bloody horrible thing to say, you really are a piece of work..you have managed to alienate some of the best members on this forum, and all this after only two months membership and 96 posts
« Last Edit: February 19, 2011, 05:13:24 AM by anniebc »
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
Never knock on deaths door..ring the bell and run..he really hates that.

Offline BT65

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Re: A positive, positive thread
« Reply #68 on: February 19, 2011, 06:42:39 AM »
I am managing HIV/AIDS, it is NOT managing me

I am HAPPY AND HEALTHY AND AT THE MOMENT, IT'S NO BIG DEAL!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Ah, well, HIV does sort of manage me.  When I was young, I always cringed when I heard my mom and her friends discussing their health problems....until I got older.  Then I understood.  Especially after being diagnosed 21 years ago, and talking with people back then about every little thing going wrong with our bodies...weight loss, anemia, numbness, severe pain, and hey, am I going crazy, is that why I believe I have bugs living in my body?  And why doesn't anybody get those bugs out?  The list is endless, the mental anguish still comes and goes.  And HIV dictates that I have to take some god-awful symptom causing pills, which cause me to take about 22 more meds to manage side effects of the pills, and disease itself.  HIV managed to cause me deep grief I never thought was possible.  HIV derailed my personal life to the point of giving up a previous career, and making a will at the age of 24. 

But, I've made it this long, for unknown reasons.  Am I happy about it?  Happy I lived, most of the time.  But not at all happy about having Aids.  I could have grown emotionally and intellectually without being diagnosed.  The only good thing about having this disease is meeting the people I have met.  But I suppose I could have met other people who would have meant as much, couldn't I.  I don't regret meeting the people, some of the ones here I've grown close to, but it would be better if we were all without this virus, even if that would mean not knowing each other.  This was a horrible horrible twist in life that I would have been much better off without.  Bitter?  Damn right.  Downer?  No, just honest. 

JK is one of the most respected members on these boards, and to dismiss what he says is, well, dangerous.  Closing one's mind to other points of view is, well, sort of prejudice.  If people want to be continuously optimistic and joyful, fine.  But give those of us who have gone through the worst of this, validity.  What we feel matters as much as those who are dancing on air.  If you don't like what some of us have to say, tough.  Get over yourselves.
I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

Offline wolfter

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Re: A positive, positive thread
« Reply #69 on: February 19, 2011, 06:43:31 AM »
I purposely have avoided posting because I couldn't contribute anything constructive without derailing the post.  If this sort of post brings positivity and mental strength, then we LTS need to allow that communication to exist.
I've already said what my feelings and thoughts are and refuse to beat another person with them.  

What I find quite distressing are the personal attacks that produce nothing positive but instead, drives a wedge.  I imagine that being from several different generations, we are going to view most topics differently.  Maybe there is a valid point to the thread and I will therefore just sit back and absorb and possibly learn something.  This "old dog" is willing to do learn new tricks (got kinda excited typing that).  I don't suddenly expect a paradigm shift, but I'll at least listen.
Complacency is the enemy.  ;)  Challenge yourself daily for maximum  return on investment.

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: A positive, positive thread
« Reply #70 on: February 19, 2011, 07:52:29 AM »
It's more than a little ironic that was began as "a positive positive thread" has degenerated into brawling.

Cut it out right now or there are going to be some positive Time Outs handed out to any and all who are throwing punches here.

Nuf said.

Andy Velez

Offline Miss Philicia

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Re: A positive, positive thread
« Reply #71 on: February 19, 2011, 08:13:36 AM »
"In with anger, out with love." ::)
"I’ve slept with enough men to know that I’m not gay"

Offline komnaes

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Re: A positive, positive thread
« Reply #72 on: February 19, 2011, 09:06:35 AM »
"In with anger, out with love." ::)

.. and a mandatory group hug .. that's what we do in our support group.. :D
Aug 07 Diagnosed
Oct 07 CD4=446(19%) Feb 08 CD4=421(19%)
Jun 08 CD4=325(22%) Jul 08 CD4=301(18%)
Sep 08 CD4=257/VL=75,000 Oct 08 CD4=347(16%)
Dec 08 CD4=270(16%)
Jan 09 CD4=246(13%)/VL=10,000
Feb 09 CD4=233(15%)/VL=13,000
Started meds Sustiva/Epzicom
May 09 CD4=333(24%)/VL=650
Aug 09 CD4=346(24%)/VL=UD
Nov 09 CD4=437(26%)/VL=UD
Feb 10 CD4=471(31%)/VL=UD
June 10 CD4=517 (28%)/VL=UD
Sept 10 CD4=687 (31%)/VL=UD
Jan 11 CD4=557 (30%)/VL=UD
April 11 CD4=569 (32%)/VL=UD
Switched to Epizcom, Reyataz and Norvir
(Interrupted for 2 months with only Epizcom & Reyataz)
July 11 CD=520 (28%)/VL=UD
Oct 11 CD=771 (31%)/VL=UD(<30)
April 12 CD=609 (28%)/VL=UD(<20)
Aug 12 CD=657 (29%)/VL=UD(<20)
Dec 12 CD=532 (31%)/VL=UD(<20)
May 13 CD=567 (31%)/VL=UD(<20)
Jan 14 CD=521 (21%)/VL=UD(<50)

Offline littleprince

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Re: A positive, positive thread
« Reply #73 on: February 19, 2011, 09:20:00 AM »
I purposely have avoided posting because I couldn't contribute anything constructive without derailing the post.  If this sort of post brings positivity and mental strength, then we LTS need to allow that communication to exist.

Thank you for that comment. I certainly wasn't trying to dismiss the LTS or denigrate them in any way.

I see a lot of good things happening to people. Like falling in love, having babies. I thought some people (including me) would gain by having a glimpse into the lives of others and see that the future still holds promise. That positive things will still happen to them. I thank those who shared a little of this.

BTW, I think some have miss read the OP. I didn't ask for positives that have been caused by HIV. I asked for positives that have happened after HIV. I also used the term 'related to HIV' which again does not mean 'caused by HIV'.

Offline NycJoe

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Re: A positive, positive thread
« Reply #74 on: February 19, 2011, 09:38:38 AM »
HIV absolutely sucks.  I hate it.  Would not wish it on anyone.  Been positive for about 8 years now fighting the good fight.  HIV in itself causes NO good.  Now on that note, any major life event can cause a life reevaluation.  Well my major life event happened to be being diagnosed with HIV.  Now because of that event, I reevaluated my life and decided to go in a new direction.  I went back to college at the age of 40 and just finished graduating with a Bachelor of Science in Radiologic Science with honors.  Something I NEVER thought I would do.  I have become much closer to my family, taking much better care of my body,  and have become a much more dependable and responsible person.  I don't drink, smoke, nor do drugs of any kind any more.   I honestly doubt I would have done any of this without some major shake up.  Am I thanking HIV for this?  No.  What I am saying is that because of that life changing moment, these things came to pass for ME.  So these are all positive things that happened for me because of this life changing moment.  I do not wear rose colored glasses.  But I am thankful for the better choices I have made since.  I think that is what people are trying to say. 

Science, education, and life stories are all very important.  It is also important to hear some good things from people here and there.  We always hear the negative things which after a while can really drag someone down and they are important to hear.  But at the same time I don't want the people having good stories, positive stories to not be heard.  They are just as important.  Disagreements are fine.  I think disagreement can happen without putting people down or judgement.  So bring on both the good and the bad.  That is life. 

Joe

Offline drewm

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Re: A positive, positive thread
« Reply #75 on: February 19, 2011, 01:06:29 PM »
Thanks for the PM's. Sorry if I came across as brash and uncaring. If I didn't care, perhaps I would have gone to bed long before 2:30 in the morning.

1.) I HATE THIS VIRUS

2.) I AM TAKING SOMETHING POSITIVE FROM HAVING IT FOR MY OWN, PERSONAL, MENTAL HEALTH.

3.) I RESPECT WHAT ANYONE WHO IS LIVING WITH THIS BUG HAS TO SAY BECAUSE WE ALL OWN IT, UNFORTUNATELY.

4.) I RESPECT DIFFERENT OPINIONS AND COMMENTS BECAUSE I DON'T KNOW IT ALL, I WISH I DID, I WISH I HAD A CURE THEN NONE OF US, NOT ONE, WOULD HAVE TO BE HERE UNDER THESE CIRCUMSTANCES.

5.) I AM NOT AFRAID TO DISAGREE AND WILL TRY NOT TO BE DISAGREEABLE. I DID TAKE SOME BODY BLOWS YESTERDAY BUT NOTHING COMPARED TO WHAT THIS NASTY BITCH LIVING INSIDE ME HAS DONE.

6.) I AM NOT SURE THE BITCH FIGHT ACCOMPLISHED ANYTHING, IT CERTAINLY DID NOT HELP ME ALTHOUGH IT DID OPEN MY EYES AS TO SPECIFIC ALLIANCES AND IT CERTAINLY QUANTIFIED SOME OF WHAT I HAVE BEEN TOLD ABOUT POSITIONING ON DIFFERENT ISSUES.

At least, we are all alive and healthy enough to discuss, passionately how and why we feel the way we do.

***The all CAPS is not yelling, it's just emphasizing because my eyesight is a little rough this morning err, uhm, afternoon.***
Diagnosed in  May of 2010 with teh AIDS.

PCP Pneumonia . CD4 8 . VL 500,000

ATRIPLA - VALTREX -  FLUOXETINE - FENOFIBRATE


Numbers consistent since 12/2010 - VL has remained undetectable and CD4 is anywhere from 275-325

Offline Joe K

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Re: A positive, positive thread
« Reply #76 on: February 19, 2011, 01:43:46 PM »
6.) I AM NOT SURE THE BITCH FIGHT ACCOMPLISHED ANYTHING, IT CERTAINLY DID NOT HELP ME ALTHOUGH IT DID OPEN MY EYES AS TO SPECIFIC ALLIANCES AND IT CERTAINLY QUANTIFIED SOME OF WHAT I HAVE BEEN TOLD ABOUT POSITIONING ON DIFFERENT ISSUES.

I was going to say, that in a thread, that contains some truly heart-rendering comments, as well as some vicious attacks, that there was some consensus on the OP. That we all essentially are saying the same thing, even if we use different words. As I read the later comments, I know that most of you get what is being said. The idea that we are subject to HIV, but we refuse it give it more than it absolutely demands. That we all possess the potential for personal growth and we can and will, live meaningful productive lives, HIV be damned. I felt hopeful, that maybe this "divide" between the newly infected and LTS was not real and then I read the above.

Drewn, I am at a loss for words. You have no idea how hurtful your words are. If you honestly believe that the posts from LTS, are based on some alliance, I do not know what to say. If, by alliance, you mean that some members share a certain history with HIV and that we insist on everyone sharing the views, shaped by that history, you are very wrong. We share our experiences, because life with HIV has shown us that they work. We have this conversation regularly in the forums and some of us, always respond, because we know that what matters in living with HIV is belief in yourself, not some virus.

Most hurtful however, is your last comment suggesting that you have been told, that certain topics have a predefined position and I have absolutely no reply for that thought. The implications of what you are saying are very disheartening and have confirmed my worst fears, regarding some members of this forum. I will now be very careful about replying to certain posts, because I realize that for some members, my thoughts have already been discounted, without my saying a word.

A final thought. Some of the posters here, need to step back and see how mean and hurtful your comments were. Some of you owe apologies to other posters, who were only trying to help.

Offline drewm

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Re: A positive, positive thread
« Reply #77 on: February 19, 2011, 02:00:24 PM »
@killfoile - "A final thought. Some of the posters here, need to step back and see how mean and hurtful your comments were. Some of you owe apologies to other posters, who were only trying to help."

I'll do one better. I'm out of here. This is not what I came her for. If I wanted to engage in a bitch fight I would go into Montrose and seek out some GaGa queens or go face down Fred Phelps. If I have questions about my health, I will ask my doctor and if I have mental health issues, I will call my shrink.

All this has done is made me jaded and I am not a jaded person normally.

Ciao
Diagnosed in  May of 2010 with teh AIDS.

PCP Pneumonia . CD4 8 . VL 500,000

ATRIPLA - VALTREX -  FLUOXETINE - FENOFIBRATE


Numbers consistent since 12/2010 - VL has remained undetectable and CD4 is anywhere from 275-325

Offline Matty the Damned

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Re: A positive, positive thread
« Reply #78 on: February 19, 2011, 02:10:45 PM »
@killfoile - "A final thought. Some of the posters here, need to step back and see how mean and hurtful your comments were. Some of you owe apologies to other posters, who were only trying to help."

I'll do one better. I'm out of here. This is not what I came her for. If I wanted to engage in a bitch fight I would go into Montrose and seek out some GaGa queens or go face down Fred Phelps. If I have questions about my health, I will ask my doctor and if I have mental health issues, I will call my shrink.

All this has done is made me jaded and I am not a jaded person normally.

Ciao

Exit stage left on your 99th post?

Surely you've got one left in you so you can round out to your century?

MtD

Offline bmancanfly

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Re: A positive, positive thread
« Reply #79 on: February 19, 2011, 02:16:05 PM »
I don't think Drew owes anyone an apology.  He's just as entitled to voice his views as anyone else.

And if you don't like it, tough fucking shit.

MtD
"The trouble with the world is that the stupid are cocksure and the intelligent are full of doubt."

 Bertrand Russell

Offline Joe K

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Re: A positive, positive thread
« Reply #80 on: February 19, 2011, 02:22:47 PM »
I'll do one better. I'm out of here. This is not what I came her for. If I wanted to engage in a bitch fight I would go into Montrose and seek out some GaGa queens or go face down Fred Phelps. If I have questions about my health, I will ask my doctor and if I have mental health issues, I will call my shrink.

Now I see your point. Any rational comments, that goes against what you "know" are a bitch fight. Honey, you have no idea what a real bitch fight is like and nothing like that went on in this thread. Yes there were strong sentiments expressed and that is part of why this forum is so special. For myself, I was only trying to help and I expressed my views, without attacking or insulting anyone else. Can you say the same? And spare me blaming the forum for becoming jaded. Given some of your posts... pot, kettle, black.

Offline skeebo1969

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Re: A positive, positive thread
« Reply #81 on: February 19, 2011, 02:24:27 PM »
I don't think Drew owes anyone an apology.  He's just as entitled to voice his views as anyone else.

I totally agree.

I was going to say, that in a thread, that contains some truly heart-rendering comments, as well as some vicious attacks, that there was some consensus on the OP. That we all essentially are saying the same thing, even if we use different words. As I read the later comments, I know that most of you get what is being said. The idea that we are subject to HIV, but we refuse it give it more than it absolutely demands. That we all possess the potential for personal growth and we can and will, live meaningful productive lives, HIV be damned. I felt hopeful, that maybe this "divide" between the newly infected and LTS was not real and then I read the above.

Drewn, I am at a loss for words. You have no idea how hurtful your words are. If you honestly believe that the posts from LTS, are based on some alliance, I do not know what to say. If, by alliance, you mean that some members share a certain history with HIV and that we insist on everyone sharing the views, shaped by that history, you are very wrong. We share our experiences, because life with HIV has shown us that they work. We have this conversation regularly in the forums and some of us, always respond, because we know that what matters in living with HIV is belief in yourself, not some virus.

Most hurtful however, is your last comment suggesting that you have been told, that certain topics have a predefined position and I have absolutely no reply for that thought. The implications of what you are saying are very disheartening and have confirmed my worst fears, regarding some members of this forum. I will now be very careful about replying to certain posts, because I realize that for some members, my thoughts have already been discounted, without my saying a word.

A final thought. Some of the posters here, need to step back and see how mean and hurtful your comments were. Some of you owe apologies to other posters, who were only trying to help.

A final thought. Some of the posters here, need to step back and see how mean and hurtful your comments were. Some of you owe apologies to other posters, who were only trying to help.

You need to include Jonathan when you say this for he is far from innocent.  I've reread his post a few times and for the life of me cannot see it the way you guys want us to.  


I cannot for the life of me understand how it is empowering to manufacture positive thoughts about a virus whose costs and stigma continue to stagger the mind. I really don't.

This is as insulting as asking if there was an upside to my Dad's death. I got through it, if not exactly past, but Christ. Is there an upside to a miscarriage? Is there an upside to poverty? Rape?

And Hellraiser, the humor you see from folks on this thread, unless I am mistaken, is because they have the same reaction as I did. We get through by our dark humor, but the serious reaction - and the understandable one - is to simply be aghast at the notion that having HIV can in any way be construed as being a good thing.

And for the folks who talk about it making them seize the day, better themselves, treat their bodies and spirits and friends better, I raise an eyebrow. You mean all that was impossible without HIV? You mean that without this virus actively aging your mitochondrial DNA you would have never grown, personally?

Seriously?

Either that is bullshit or everything you have become post-infection is predicated on a terrible lie.

Like Drew the above does not make me all warm and fuzzy.   And I don't want to hear about wanting to be pacified with gentle words, because it's not necessary.  Let's face it, everyone reacts to being diagnosed and living with this disease differently and in doing this, it doesn't mean we take it lightly or less seriously than YOU.

We are not ignoring the past nor do we go without fear of what the future brings.  We are not a danger to fellow possies as has been suggested.  That's complete bullshit.

The victim role played by Jonathan now and the backing of his words without any admittance to his wrong is strange to say the least.  
I despise the song Love is in the Air, you should too.

Offline Joe K

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Re: A positive, positive thread
« Reply #82 on: February 19, 2011, 02:30:59 PM »
To clarify, I said that some posters owed apologies, based on their posts and I stand by that comment. I purposely did not single out any one poster, intentionally, so please stop putting words into my mouth.

If this thread has devolved so badly, that nobody can reflect on their words, then so be it. Over and out.

Offline David_CA

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Re: A positive, positive thread
« Reply #83 on: February 19, 2011, 02:58:18 PM »
I don't think I've ever read a thread where so many long-term members have shown their asses as badly as they have here. 

From the OP:
Recently there have been 2 threads that started trying to be positive but ended up moving into a lot more complex history of HIV. I'd like everyone to just tell us of something positive that has happened in their life since dx, particularly if related to HIV.

I don't think the question was 'why is your life better now that you have HIV / AIDS'.  The OP didn't imply that his was.  There have been positive things in my life that happened that are related to my diagnosis.  This does not mean that they could not or would not have happened without HIV.  As an example, hubby and I went to Montreal for an AMG.  After reading Ric's posts about his and Thom's wedding plans, hubby and I decided to follow their lead and get married too.  Sure, we could have gotten married without HIV, but we didn't.  We hadn't.  We had no plans to. 

I read a lot of posts that are opinion oriented in terms of what they are asking.  If I haven't shared the OP's experience, I generally won't comment on it other than to offer support or helpful advice; I seldom attack.  My experiences with HIV / AIDS have very little in common with most LTS's.  I honestly can't imagine receiving an HIV diagnosis when there was no hope.  Similarly, though it's sort of repeating that last sentence, most LTS can't imagine a diagnosis where there were any number of meds to choose from... many with no or very few side effects. 

Basically, our experiences are different, but that doesn't mean that my experiences and opinions of my experiences are wrong.  It also does not mean that a LTS's experiences are wrong or that their opinions of their experiences are wrong.  They are just different.  Neither 'side' will likely really understand the experiences of the other 'side'; thread after thread have pretty much shown that.  What we all can and should do is to be respectful of others experiences and try to learn from them.  If you can't add something constructive to a thread or have relevant comments, it'd be a good time to hit the 'back' button in your browser and move on; that thread likely doesn't pertain to you.
Black Friday 03-03-2006
03-23-06 CD4 359 @27.4% VL 75,938
06-01-06 CD4 462 @24.3% VL > 100,000
08-15-06 CD4 388 @22.8% VL >  "
10-21-06 CD4 285 @21.9% VL >  "
  Atripla started 12-01-2006
01-08-07 CD4 429 @26.8% VL 1872!
05-08-07 CD4 478 @28.1% VL 740
08-03-07 CD4 509 @31.8% VL 370
11-06-07 CD4 570 @30.0% VL 140
02-21-08 CD4 648 @32.4% VL 600
05-19-08 CD4 695 @33.1% VL < 48 undetectable!
08-21-08 CD4 725 @34.5%
11-11-08 CD4 672 @39.5%
02-11-09 CD4 773 @36.8%
05-11-09 CD4 615 @36.2%
08-19-09 CD4 770 @38.5%
11-19-09 CD4 944 @33.7%
02-17-10 CD4 678 @39.9%  
06-03-10 CD4 768 @34.9%
09-21-10 CD4 685 @40.3%
01-10-11 CD4 908 @36.3%
05-23-11 CD4 846 @36.8% VL 80
02-13-12 CD4 911 @41.4% VL<20
You must be the change you want to see in the world.  Mahatma Gandhi

Offline mecch

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Re: A positive, positive thread
« Reply #84 on: February 19, 2011, 03:37:43 PM »
Gee the OP and some others, newly diagnosed or newly infected, simply asked for some positive spin.  Positive spin precisely in contrast to the route the other thread took.

Look at this thread from a distance and take a moment to consider if it worked out well. What's the point of colonizing every thread with this kind of "reality sucks" or "hard truths" discourse?

Newbies, and everyone else for that matter, have their own construction of meaning.  

Calling it a paradigm shift seems quite constructive. Or calling it a wake-up call.  

Its just arguing words, to debate if positive life experiences can result from HIV (which is a given in this crowd) or a universally possible human spirit of betterment.  Its the same fucking thing.  Just people making lemonade out of aids.  Martha Stewart would say that's "a good thing" and she wouldn't be wrong.

How about some more recul and generosity and indulgence from the "survivors".  What's it gonna hurt you, personally, to play nice.
“From each, according to his ability; to each, according to his need” 1875 K Marx

Offline Miss Philicia

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Re: A positive, positive thread
« Reply #85 on: February 19, 2011, 03:49:30 PM »
The best part of this thread is still the heart-shaped sugar cookies with pink 7-minute frosting.  Oh yeah, and I just ate three of them.  Dipped in Basil Hayden for some extra kick.
"I’ve slept with enough men to know that I’m not gay"

Offline StrongGuy

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Re: A positive, positive thread
« Reply #86 on: February 19, 2011, 03:53:54 PM »
Always amazed at others who try to control the dialogue. If you don't like the topic, move on or share your view respectfully. But trying to shut down discussion is really poor form. Anyway, that's as far as I'm wading into the muck. The trajectory of the comments speak for themselves.

Definitely good and bad things since being diagnosed, but overall I am definitely a happier person and in better straights than prior. I have better relationships, better respect for myself and the way I take care of myself, and value others a lot more. I guess my overall perspective has changed for the better.

Good topic (where on track)...
"Get your medical advice from Doctors or medical professionals who you trust and know your history."

"Beware of the fortune teller doom and gloomers who seek to bring you down and are only looking for company, purpose and validation - not your best physical/mental interests."

"You know you all are saying that this is incurable. When the real thing you should be saying is it's not curable at the present time' because as we know, the great strides we've made in medicine." - Elizabeth Edwards

Offline mecch

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Re: A positive, positive thread
« Reply #87 on: February 19, 2011, 03:54:03 PM »
Yeah everything about those cookies sounds just right!
“From each, according to his ability; to each, according to his need” 1875 K Marx

Offline Joe K

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Re: A positive, positive thread
« Reply #88 on: February 19, 2011, 04:07:57 PM »
I don't think I've ever read a thread where so many long-term members have shown their asses as badly as they have here. 

How truly sad, for many reasons.

Offline Matty the Damned

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Re: A positive, positive thread
« Reply #89 on: February 19, 2011, 04:13:40 PM »

MtD

Offline David_CA

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Re: A positive, positive thread
« Reply #90 on: February 19, 2011, 04:17:52 PM »
How truly sad, for many reasons.

I agree.
Black Friday 03-03-2006
03-23-06 CD4 359 @27.4% VL 75,938
06-01-06 CD4 462 @24.3% VL > 100,000
08-15-06 CD4 388 @22.8% VL >  "
10-21-06 CD4 285 @21.9% VL >  "
  Atripla started 12-01-2006
01-08-07 CD4 429 @26.8% VL 1872!
05-08-07 CD4 478 @28.1% VL 740
08-03-07 CD4 509 @31.8% VL 370
11-06-07 CD4 570 @30.0% VL 140
02-21-08 CD4 648 @32.4% VL 600
05-19-08 CD4 695 @33.1% VL < 48 undetectable!
08-21-08 CD4 725 @34.5%
11-11-08 CD4 672 @39.5%
02-11-09 CD4 773 @36.8%
05-11-09 CD4 615 @36.2%
08-19-09 CD4 770 @38.5%
11-19-09 CD4 944 @33.7%
02-17-10 CD4 678 @39.9%  
06-03-10 CD4 768 @34.9%
09-21-10 CD4 685 @40.3%
01-10-11 CD4 908 @36.3%
05-23-11 CD4 846 @36.8% VL 80
02-13-12 CD4 911 @41.4% VL<20
You must be the change you want to see in the world.  Mahatma Gandhi

Offline Miss Philicia

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Re: A positive, positive thread
« Reply #91 on: February 19, 2011, 04:42:02 PM »
I wish I could bake a cake filled with rainbows and smiles and everyone would eat and be happy.
"I’ve slept with enough men to know that I’m not gay"

Offline littleprince

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Re: A positive, positive thread
« Reply #92 on: February 19, 2011, 04:44:40 PM »
You're making us some pot brownies? Sweet.

Offline Dachshund

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Re: A positive, positive thread
« Reply #93 on: February 19, 2011, 04:57:32 PM »
I don't think I've ever read a thread where so many long-term members have shown their asses as badly as they have here. 

If you can't add something constructive to a thread or have relevant comments, it'd be a good time to hit the 'back' button in your browser and move on; that thread likely doesn't pertain to you.

This is what chaps my ass. Look how you started your post and then look how you finish.

Offline David_CA

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Re: A positive, positive thread
« Reply #94 on: February 19, 2011, 05:00:10 PM »
This is what chaps my ass. Look how you started your post and then look how you finish.

Yeah, Hal, I was adding something relevant and possibly constructive. 
Black Friday 03-03-2006
03-23-06 CD4 359 @27.4% VL 75,938
06-01-06 CD4 462 @24.3% VL > 100,000
08-15-06 CD4 388 @22.8% VL >  "
10-21-06 CD4 285 @21.9% VL >  "
  Atripla started 12-01-2006
01-08-07 CD4 429 @26.8% VL 1872!
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02-21-08 CD4 648 @32.4% VL 600
05-19-08 CD4 695 @33.1% VL < 48 undetectable!
08-21-08 CD4 725 @34.5%
11-11-08 CD4 672 @39.5%
02-11-09 CD4 773 @36.8%
05-11-09 CD4 615 @36.2%
08-19-09 CD4 770 @38.5%
11-19-09 CD4 944 @33.7%
02-17-10 CD4 678 @39.9%  
06-03-10 CD4 768 @34.9%
09-21-10 CD4 685 @40.3%
01-10-11 CD4 908 @36.3%
05-23-11 CD4 846 @36.8% VL 80
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You must be the change you want to see in the world.  Mahatma Gandhi

Offline GSOgymrat

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Re: A positive, positive thread
« Reply #95 on: February 19, 2011, 05:14:23 PM »
As I understand it the crux of what the OPs are asking for in “Blessing in Disguise” and “A Positive, Postive Thread” is reassurance that life will be good after a HIV diagnosis and to discuss ways that HIV has helped people make positive changes in their lives. The reason this seemingly reasonable request didn't fly well with me is because I feel I am be asked to take a traumatic experience, frame it as a good thing, wrap it with a big red ribbon and then present it to strangers solely to make them feel better. HIV has apparently given some people wonderful insights into their lives and that is truly remarkable. I don't criticize anyone for that. However when I tell my experience-- that there is nothing good about HIV, that HIV didn't give me any special insights, that my life is not split into before and after HIV— I run the risk of being labeled as negative.

For the people who want reassurance from me what you should know is that after 18 years I am very happy-- and HIV had nothing to do with it. I have good health, a fulfilling job and wonderful relationships with my partner, family, and friends. I have more material possessions than I need. I don’t think about HIV except for reading this forum (and when I have to pay for my prescriptions). The reason I even bother with AIDSmeds is because I like the people, I try to stay informed and I find “Off Topic” one of the most enjoyable sites on the web. Lots of other people on here are equally happy but don’t go on about it because it is insensitive to those who are struggling.

Everyone goes through their phases of dealing with HIV. For those who are newly infected I sincerely believe most of you will be fine as long as you have access to proper medical treatment. This is the most reassurance I can give you.

Online bocker3

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Re: A positive, positive thread
« Reply #96 on: February 19, 2011, 06:10:25 PM »
However when I tell my experience-- that there is nothing good about HIV, that HIV didn't give me any special insights, that my life is not split into before and after HIV— I run the risk of being labeled as negative.

Ford,

I don't think this is true -- sharing your experience is the best thing you can do.  Where problems start and where this thread started to go to shit is when people don't simply share their experience or their opinion, but start pointing out how someone else's experience is wrong (or hurtful, or negative, or whatever it might be called).  At the end of the day someone's experience is simply what it is -- there are no right or wrong experiences -- and it is pretty rude anyone to try and insinuate that someone's actual life experiences are "incorrect".  
Everything we have gone through to date has made us the person we are today.  If any of those experiences didn't exist then we would probably be "different" then we are today.

Again -- it is completely counter-productive to demean someone else life experience.

Mike

edited to add: 
Ford -- I am in no way implying that you have done anything like what I've said here -- I just thought that your quote was a great place for me to start my thoughts here, because one shouldn't be labeled "negative" by relaying what has happened in their life.
« Last Edit: February 19, 2011, 06:12:05 PM by bocker3 »
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Offline NycJoe

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Re: A positive, positive thread
« Reply #97 on: February 19, 2011, 06:44:48 PM »
I'm happy see that this thread is getting back on track.  I agree with some of the above posters.  Everyone has their own experience.  No one, whether positive or negative thoughts or feelings, should be discounted in any way.  Everyone brings something to the table.  No one story or outlook is anymore important than anyone elses.  We all all important.  I hope that everyone keeps sharing.  I learn new things all the time.  I learned much from my Grandparents and to this day I learn much from my young nieces and nephews.  In the same way I learn things from the newly infected and ones who have dealt with this virus for decades.

Joe

Offline Joe K

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Re: A positive, positive thread
« Reply #98 on: February 19, 2011, 07:00:06 PM »
Again -- it is completely counter-productive to demean someone else life experience.

Is this what you think I did? It was never my intention to demean anyone and I do not believe I did so. However, some of the blanket statements here, cast a shadow on every post in this thread. I am not sure if this is worth the grief, trying to honestly help and then getting lampooned for doing so.

Offline drewm

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Re: A positive, positive thread
« Reply #99 on: February 19, 2011, 07:20:47 PM »
" I am not sure if this is worth the grief, trying to honestly help and then getting lampooned for doing so."

Funny, I feel the same way.
Diagnosed in  May of 2010 with teh AIDS.

PCP Pneumonia . CD4 8 . VL 500,000

ATRIPLA - VALTREX -  FLUOXETINE - FENOFIBRATE


Numbers consistent since 12/2010 - VL has remained undetectable and CD4 is anywhere from 275-325

 


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