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Author Topic: Re: Help in regards to unprotected oral sex and mass of confusion  (Read 7465 times)

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Offline johndoeuk

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Hi there,

I'm somewhat in need some help / advice please

I shaved my penis and surrounding area about 1 to 2 before having protected vaginal sex and un protected oral sex I was receiving with a csw 2 days ago today, please bare with me as I'm giving a small recount so that I don't forget anything that could be relevant.

I was receiving un protected oral sex from her and came in her mouth 4 times over an hour, each one lasted about 5 minutes, on the 4th occasion I started to receive un protected oral then she put a condom on and we had protected vaginal sex she, was in the cowgirl position for I guess no more than a few minutes 5 minutes at most, I din't cum she then stopped and then went back to performing un protected oral on on me which is the 4t time I did cum.

We then finished I got up and cleaned myself up with some body wipes, then while I was still semi errect I noticed that I had a couple of cuts / slices near the base of my penis about 1/2" to 1" at most from the base (I hate multibladed razors) then as I recalled back the condom didn't cover those cuts, while the cuts / slices looked red they were not bledding I also had some mild razor burn just above my penis / below the stomach not sure what the area is called, her vigina would of been going below where the condon finished and on to the cuts.

I sent her a text the following day asking was she fine health wise etc. I got a reply saying "of course I get checked" and "I'm perfectly fine, I have a boyfriend so I need to get checked" I'm not going to say she's a liar but I can't count on that fact and obviously when was she last checked? she didn't say anything could of happened between then and now.

What is my hiv risk from A, the oral un protected sex now knowing I had some cuts /slices on my penis and B, protected vaginal sex albeit protected but the condom didn't cover the base what are the chances of vaginal fluids getting into the slices etc. as she would of been touching those cuts

I'm aware that I might have caught other sti/std's from the un protected oral so will wait 10 to 14 days if no symptoms araise I will go get checked or if anything does show I'll obviously go sooner.


Your advice would be most welcomed indeed.

Thanks for your time.

« Last Edit: February 11, 2011, 05:04:26 AM by johndoeuk »

Offline Andy Velez

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You are worrying needlessly. I thought I'd get to that bottom line quickly since you're clearly very anxious about this recent experience.

You used a condom for insertive vaginal which is exactly what you are supposed to do. As long as you had a condom on those nicks don't mean a thing. And although you couldn't tell by looking with a bare eye, those nicks were already closing up.

As for unprotected oral, which is one of the most common of sexual acts, it is not a risk for HIV transmission, including with nicks on your penis. In the entire history of the epidemic there has never been a confirmed case of transmission to a guy through his receiving oral. Even with whatever varying details you throw into the mix, it is safe to say you aren't going to make history by becoming the first to become infected in that manner.

The only confirmed risks for the sexual transmission of HIV are unprotected vaginal and anal intercourse. Use a condom everytime for those acts and you will be effectively protected.

Lastly, you used the term "clean" in referring to your partner's HIV status. That is considered to be offensive here because it implies that anyone who is HIV+ is dirty or unclean. HIV is a virus. Someone is either positive or negative and those are the terms you should use to refer to someone's status.

There's no need for testing nor for further concern about HIV in relation to your recent experience.
Andy Velez

Offline johndoeuk

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Thank you for the reply much appreciated and I'm sorry for the "term" I used I didn't mean to offend and if I have I wish to apologise to anyone that I caused offence to, it was not my intention just quoting what she replied with and yes I should of done some thinking / self editing.


I will still test for hiv just for total ease of mind plus it has been a year since my last test which was negative, but it sounds like I should not worry on this occasion as the result I should be expecting to hear then is negative.

I will still get tested for all the other sti/std's as they could of been passed on to me via unprotected oral.

Again thank you for your reply it has helped to put my mind at ease.

Offline Ann

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John,

I totally agree with Andy that you were not at risk. However, getting a complete sexual health check up at least once a year is always the right, responsible thing to do.

Here's what you need to know in order to remain hiv negative:

You need to be using condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, every time, no exceptions until such time as you are in a securely monogamous relationship where you have both tested for ALL sexually transmitted infections together.

To agree to have unprotected intercourse is to consent to the possibility of being infected with an STI. Sex without a condom lasts only a matter of minutes, but hiv is forever.

Have a look through the condom and lube links in my signature line so you can use condoms with confidence.

Anyone who is sexually active should be having a full sexual health care check-up, including but not limited to hiv testing, at least once a year and more often if unprotected intercourse occurs.

If you aren't already having regular, routine check-ups, now is the time to start. As long as you make sure condoms are being used for intercourse, you can fully expect your routine hiv tests to return with negative results.

Don't forget to always get checked for all the other sexually transmitted infections as well, because they are MUCH easier to transmit than hiv.

Use condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, correctly and consistently, and you will avoid hiv infection. It really is that simple!

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline johndoeuk

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Sorry me again just a final question in relation to healing nicks etc.

in relation to the cuts on the penis couldn't they open up again during vaginal sex i.e. by the motions of sex etc as they were fresh cuts? or is it because the cuts were that small? they were about a 1mm by 3, thinking back she would of been all the way down to the base where the cuts were etc. which is well below where the condom didn't cover.


Offline Andy Velez

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Hey,

I've never known of a single confirmed case in the manner about which you are worried. HIV is a fragile virus and needs the kind of receptive setting provided during intercourse. The risk for the guy is strictly through the pee hole or the underside of the foreskin if he is not circumcised.

Whatever your doubts and details, you are worrying needlessly. You did not have a risk and there is no basis in HIV science for you to be concerned nor any need for testing. Period.
Andy Velez

Offline johndoeuk

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Thank you for the reply

Offline Andy Velez

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You're welcome.
Andy Velez

Offline johndoeuk

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Re: Help in regards to unprotected oral sex and mass of confusion
« Reply #8 on: February 22, 2012, 09:50:29 AM »
Hi there I performed oral sex and received oral sex with a female csw, in my stupidity with out and forms of protection, I'm not to sure if I had any cuts in my gums or lips I know I wasn't bleeding visually but what are the risks of HIV via oral sex?

Looking through on many sites that are recognized sites in regards to HIV / Aids such as the CDC etc. the risk is stated yes possible and possibly has been cases of HIV infection via this practice, yet other sites state its considered safe with out use of protection so needless to say its all very confusing indeed in regards to HIV transmission and I'm in need of advice, I know other stds can be caught this way but yeah I'm just left confused with the whole HIV thing and oral sex.

Many thanks.

Offline RapidRod

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Re: Help in regards to unprotected oral sex and mass of confusion
« Reply #9 on: February 22, 2012, 09:52:34 AM »
You never had a risk from oral sex.

Please do not start a new thread every time you have another question or thought - regardless if you think your questions are related to each other or not. It helps us to help you when you keep all your thoughts or questions in one thread and it helps other readers to follow the discussion. Additional threads will be merged.

If you cannot find your thread, click on the "Show own posts" link in the left-hand column of any forum page, under your name.
« Last Edit: February 22, 2012, 09:54:07 AM by RapidRod »

Offline johndoeuk

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Re: Help in regards to unprotected oral sex and mass of confusion
« Reply #10 on: February 22, 2012, 09:57:48 AM »
thank you for the speedy reply helps put my mind at risk, question though why doesn't such sites as the CDC being a government site have the correct info available? as it would help many put many peoples minds at ease or do they have it there just like a disclaimer sort of thing?

thank you once again!

Offline Ann

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    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: Re: Help in regards to unprotected oral sex and mass of confusion
« Reply #11 on: February 22, 2012, 01:04:06 PM »
John,

I've merged your new thread into your original thread - where you should post all your additional thoughts or questions. It helps us to help you when you keep everything in one thread. It doesn't matter how long it has been since you last posted in your thread or if the subject matter is different.

If you need help finding your thread when you come here, click on the "Show own posts" link under your name in the left-hand column of any forum page.

Please also read through the Welcome Thread so you can familiarize yourself with our Forum Posting Guidelines. Thank you for your cooperation.

Please re-read your entire thread. It contains general advice you need to remember.



Neither getting a blowjob nor going down on a woman are risks for hiv infection. Not only is saliva not infectious, but it also contains over a dozen different proteins and enzymes that damage hiv and render it unable to infect.


There have been three long-term studies of couples where one is positive and one is negative. In the couples who used condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, but no barrier for oral activities, not one of the negative partners became infected with hiv. Not one.

You didn't have a risk.

If you wish to know why some site continue to publish outdated or misleading and/or incorrect information, you'll have to write to them and ask. BTW, if you find out, let me know because it's a mystery to me - a very frustrating one.

Ann

Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline johndoeuk

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  • Posts: 7
Re: Help in regards to unprotected oral sex and mass of confusion
« Reply #12 on: August 02, 2012, 08:06:20 AM »
Sorry forgot you had merged all my posts, have posted the following as a new topic but now have edited that one to please delete ;)

Hi there about 3 months ago I had un protected oral sex and protected vaginal sex with a female csw, I did my business shall we say with cim after she removed the condom and then a again a bit later with hand relief and sucking with out a condom.

Recently I've felt some discomfort not painful in the head of my penis, its almost like it's the feeling that I need to go pee but I don't like a very very mild burning if that, sorry I find things hard to explain, I do NOT have any discharge nor does it hurt to pass urine, nor any itching, no discomfort in the testicles either which I have read that maybe be a cause of Chlamydia and Gonorrhea, but could this be a sign of chlamydia, gonorrhea or could it be an NGU? never heard of an NGU before, is NGU only sexually transmitted or can it be created on its own with in a body with out any form of sexual activity then passed on, and also any HIV risk at all?

I've just gone for a STD check yesterday and was prescribed Zithromax 250mg x4 to be taken all at once for a 1g dose I guess for my symptom, my problem is I can't swallow capsules and they don't offer a suspension is it? / liquid form can I open the capsules and mix with fluid that way? as I suffer from swallowing problems.

Now needless to say I'm very scared, I'm married and worried if the any of the above that I may have passed it on to my wife as we did have un protected intercourse a few weeks backs, I know I haven't got it from her as I know she's highly faithful and I'm the one at fault, now I feel my world my life is about to crumble down around me big time, so maybe in some way for all you other guys out there reading this and doing similar activities as I do and have a wife or girlfriend treat this as your warning and stop or go fully protected.

I did call the place that the csw worked for, she has since left but the lady said she would call her and ask when she last had a full sti/hiv check up, so got back to me said the lady was checked two weeks for hiv/sti and all was clear, as I say my possible risk was about 3 months ago so should I expect my own tests to come back all clear? or could I have any risk? I've heard sti's via unprotected oral is low but there still remains a risk.

Sorry for the long read and any advice or opinions are greatly accepted, now begins the 14 day approx count down of dread for the text of all clear, or a text or call with in 7 to 10 days of please come see us as something has been found.

This is my wake up call never will I do anything like this again
« Last Edit: August 02, 2012, 08:13:00 AM by johndoeuk »

Offline Ann

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  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: Re: Help in regards to unprotected oral sex and mass of confusion
« Reply #13 on: August 02, 2012, 08:23:42 AM »
John,

As you were previously told, you did NOT have a risk for hiv infection with the sex worker.

As for whatever is going on with your penis, we cannot possibly speculate but we CAN tell you that it has nothing to do with hiv. The only way you're going to know what's going on is through your test results - and if they come back positive for chlamydia or gonorrhea or whatever, your wife will have to be checked out.

Regarding your antibiotics, you need to contact your doctor or pharmacist with your question. We cannot give you the answer.

Please keep in mind that this is an hiv-specific forum, we're not an STI forum.

Ann


Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

 


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