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Author Topic: blessing in disguise?  (Read 22324 times)

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Offline bocker3

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Re: blessing in disguise?
« Reply #50 on: February 06, 2011, 05:03:14 PM »
Please someone lock this thread now -- it is going to go downhill at an amazing clip.  Nothing good will come of this recent turn -- it never does whenever this sort of thing comes up.  Why can't people just let it be -- each side is set on their view.

PLEASE LET THIS ONE GO NOW.

Mike

Atripla - Started 12/05
Reyataz/Norvir - Added 6/06
Labs - Pre-Meds
Sep05 T=350/25% VL98,559
Nov05 288/18%  47,564
Current Labs
May2013 691/31% <20

Offline woodshere

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Re: blessing in disguise?
« Reply #51 on: February 06, 2011, 05:53:40 PM »
 Why can't people just let it be -- each side is set on their view.


I couldn't disagree more!  I thought one of the purposes of this site was to discuss different issues and ideas.  If we lock everythread when people have a disagreement then what is the purpose.  Sure this old vs new has been discussed too many times to count and probably will be discussed many more times and will often take a turn for the worse.  However sometimes through it all minds will be changed or respect for a differing opinion will happen.  These days it seems many people only want validation of what they think and anyone who disagrees is placed on ignore.  How closed minded.
"Let us give pubicity to HV/AIDS and not hide it..." "One of the things destroying people with AIDS is the stigma we attach to it."   Nelson Mandela

Offline lipoenvy

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Re: blessing in disguise?
« Reply #52 on: February 06, 2011, 08:26:17 PM »
If it's a blessing, it's wearing a really good disguise.

"...someone who carried himself as if terrible things were giving him wonderful gifts -- compassion from grief, courage from fear, patience and serenity from sorrow."
-- Peter Cashorali, "The Ugly Duckling," from Fairy Tales

Offline bocker3

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Re: blessing in disguise?
« Reply #53 on: February 06, 2011, 10:28:05 PM »
I couldn't disagree more!  I thought one of the purposes of this site was to discuss different issues and ideas.  If we lock everythread when people have a disagreement then what is the purpose.  Sure this old vs new has been discussed too many times to count and probably will be discussed many more times and will often take a turn for the worse.  However sometimes through it all minds will be changed or respect for a differing opinion will happen.  These days it seems many people only want validation of what they think and anyone who disagrees is placed on ignore.  How closed minded.

No -- not closed minded at all.  I am not taking a side here -- I agree with you that folks with opposing views should listen to each other and learn, even if their mind isn't changed.  However, I am simply that stating that history shows this topic is one that rarely ends without hurt feelings -- in fact they have already been shown in this one.  People don't try and "change minds" they simply reiterate how their side is "right" and the other side "doesn't get it".   Sure some minds may be changed, but these new vs. old almost always get into a pissing match by those who's minds will not change. 
You may enjoy sitting back and watching members rip each other apart -- I do not.  So save your condescending crap and stop projecting motives on me that I don't have.

Mike
Atripla - Started 12/05
Reyataz/Norvir - Added 6/06
Labs - Pre-Meds
Sep05 T=350/25% VL98,559
Nov05 288/18%  47,564
Current Labs
May2013 691/31% <20

Offline woodshere

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Re: blessing in disguise?
« Reply #54 on: February 06, 2011, 10:37:43 PM »
You may enjoy sitting back and watching members rip each other apart -- I do not.  So save your condescending crap and stop projecting motives on me that I don't have.


I guess I left off the part in my original post that another tactic to use when someone disagrees with you is this shit you just wrote and go into the attack mode.  I did not say anything in the least that was condescending or projected motives on you.  I simply disagreed with the idea of locking a thread when a few members disagree.
"Let us give pubicity to HV/AIDS and not hide it..." "One of the things destroying people with AIDS is the stigma we attach to it."   Nelson Mandela

Offline BT65

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Re: blessing in disguise?
« Reply #55 on: February 07, 2011, 04:34:08 AM »
The idea that HIV prevention information was plentiful in the mid-80s is wrong, as witnessed by an uncaring President Reagan and a disinterested public. There was barely enough HIV service funding to meet even the basic needs of our community and printing prevention information was not always a top priority. Trying to keep people alive was.

This is very true.  The ASO we have here today started off in two little offices in a church administration building.  There were the founder, the co-founder, and volunteers.  There was no funding for prevention-we simply went around to different venues telling our stories, and urging people to get tested.  We held on to whatever we thought would make life a little more bearable.  And we sat beside each other when the time came to end the race.  The government showed no sign of wanting to educate the public about HIV/AIDS, nor wanting to give money towards those lives which were fading away, to make things a bit more tolerable for them.   There were only two doctors in the area who had the faintest clue about how to treat the virus.  And we were constantly scrambling to try to find something, anything, that would offer hope, however small it was.

HIV is not a blessing to me.  Oh, I've met some wonderful people I may not have met otherwise.  And I'm thankful for that; but a lot of those people are no longer here, and I hate that.  I live every day with things wrong in my body thanks to HIV, having to take handfuls of meds, and trying to tolerate side effects from those meds.  HIV came in, disrupted my life totally, and stole a lot of people, and dreams away.  It made me give up my career I had at the time.  I sat by far too many people's bedsides, and tearfully said good bye, than I would have had it not been for this damn virus.  I have permanent damage done to my health and body thanks to this.  I'm only 45, but my body says otherwise, more like 65.  I had to watch the heartbreak of those in my family who stood by me, when my health teetered on the edge more than once.  I had to explain to my young child that she would have to go stay with relatives, when my weight got to 80 lbs, because I was not capable of taking care of her, only capable of laying on the sofa with adult-sized diapers on, shitting myself, and depending on the kindness of Hospice nurses, and others who would change me, wash me off, and talk to me.  And I've been to far, far too many memorial services.  And it rips my heart out every time, whether it was then, or now.

Blessing?  Hell no.  It's been a nightmare.
I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

Offline bocker3

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Re: blessing in disguise?
« Reply #56 on: February 07, 2011, 07:36:43 AM »
I guess I left off the part in my original post that another tactic to use when someone disagrees with you is this shit you just wrote and go into the attack mode.  I did not say anything in the least that was condescending or projected motives on you.  I simply disagreed with the idea of locking a thread when a few members disagree.

No, you didn't -- you lectured me on how a discussion should be held AND called me closed minded.  Now you will probably say that you weren't saying all this about me -- yet you quoted me.  I didn't suggest the thread be locked because of disagreement -- I suggested it because the topic was already heading down it's normal, ugly, path.

So, let me say one last thing -- perhaps you will take your own advice and listen to what I am say and not what you think I am saying, then perhaps you will learn, I was not trying to stop a discussion, I was trying to stop an argument that almost always goes no where on these boards.  You see, I did agree with your general comment that one can learn from a good discussion -- however, this particular topic rarely results in a good discussion.  If you are having trouble seeing the distinction, I'll happily disucss it with you -- but perhaps you aren't looking to discuss -- but to state that you are right and I am wrong.

Mike
Atripla - Started 12/05
Reyataz/Norvir - Added 6/06
Labs - Pre-Meds
Sep05 T=350/25% VL98,559
Nov05 288/18%  47,564
Current Labs
May2013 691/31% <20

Offline Dachshund

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Re: blessing in disguise?
« Reply #57 on: February 07, 2011, 07:58:43 AM »
 
You may enjoy sitting back and watching members rip each other apart -- I do not.  So save your condescending crap and stop projecting motives on me that I don't have.

Mike

If you don't like to watch then don't watch. To call others condescending is well, condescending.

Offline drewm

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Re: blessing in disguise?
« Reply #58 on: February 07, 2011, 11:48:56 AM »
I have not been here as long as many of you so my experiences are relative to my being dxd last Spring. I find this experience to be incredibly personal on the deepest levels of my soul. I came here to offer up my own experiences and to learn from those of you who have been fighting this virus much longer than I have.

Assigning blame for HIV/AIDS is akin to assigning blame for cancer. My Dad died of lung cancer despite the warnings on cigarette packages that smoking kills. He smoked non stop even after being diagnosed. You can make all the judgement calls you want, God knows I have but at the end of the day, that disease was his much in the same way this one is ours.

The bottom line (no pun intended) is that we HAVE IT. There is not turning back the hands of time only hope for a cure and even better treatment. I am thankful for those who have paved the way for the progress that has been made and hope that all of us take something from this that is bigger and better than ourselves. A blessing? No. Adapting to life changing illness? ABSOLUTELY. I hope you all stay strong and healthy and hope I get some of that back.

All the best...
Diagnosed in  May of 2010 with teh AIDS.

PCP Pneumonia . CD4 8 . VL 500,000

ATRIPLA - VALTREX -  FLUOXETINE - FENOFIBRATE


Numbers consistent since 12/2010 - VL has remained undetectable and CD4 is anywhere from 275-325

Offline Joe K

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Re: blessing in disguise?
« Reply #59 on: February 07, 2011, 01:18:03 PM »
Please someone lock this thread now -- it is going to go downhill at an amazing clip.  Nothing good will come of this recent turn -- it never does whenever this sort of thing comes up.  Why can't people just let it be -- each side is set on their view.

PLEASE LET THIS ONE GO NOW.

Mike

Hey Mike, I also disagree with your above suggestion, because while being sensitive to certain subjects is desirable, predicting that any discussion on a "tough" topic will only result in failure, seems counter productive to me. How are we to ever bridge this so-called "old vs. new" division, when not only is discussion not encouraged, it is assumed that any such discussion will serve no good purpose?

Offline Jeff G

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Re: blessing in disguise?
« Reply #60 on: February 07, 2011, 01:21:48 PM »
Hey Mike, I also disagree with your above suggestion, because while being sensitive to certain subjects is desirable, predicting that any discussion on a "tough" topic will only result in failure, seems counter productive to me. How are we to ever bridge this so-called "old vs. new" division, when not only is discussion not encouraged, it is assumed that any such discussion will serve no good purpose?



I agree completely . This thread has been a very civil one for the most part .   

Offline wolfter

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Re: blessing in disguise?
« Reply #61 on: February 07, 2011, 03:06:24 PM »
This thread has been more sensitive than many I've witnessed.  As I stated early on, none of us LTS have any idea if we'd have done anything different if the information was as readily available as it is today.  I"m sure some of us would (I would love to think I'd be in this group) take precuations and many of us wouldn't have.  I'll admit I get upset about all the new cases being diagnosed.  I also get upset with all the unwanted teen pregnancies, recreational drug overdoses, deaths from smoking and so many other things that can be prevented.  Perhaps this can marked up to our ages, as much as our HIV status.  The younger people don't always see eye-to-eye in other aspects of life as we middle agers, and this is just another topic of viewed differences.

Now, lets all have a glass of wine and dance to the oldies.
Complacency is the enemy.  ;)  Challenge yourself daily for maximum  return on investment.

Offline bocker3

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Re: blessing in disguise?
« Reply #62 on: February 07, 2011, 07:31:05 PM »
Alright -- I can admit when I'm wrong -- and I was wrong here.

This thread did not go the route I thought it would, I was way to hasty and presumptious.

I do want to make one thing clear, in case anyone has misconstrued my intent.  I do encourage dialogue and discussion -- even on (especially on) "tough" topics.  What I do find disheartening is when folks are only interested in giving their view and not trying to see and understand the other side (not agree with it, but at least understand it).  We can all fall into that trap -- myself included.

So -- apologies to Woodshere, as I got a little testy.  I am happy that I was wrong -- I like seeing good discussion -- lord knows I've learned a lot on here and I hope I've helped others learn too, over time.

Hugs,
Mike
Atripla - Started 12/05
Reyataz/Norvir - Added 6/06
Labs - Pre-Meds
Sep05 T=350/25% VL98,559
Nov05 288/18%  47,564
Current Labs
May2013 691/31% <20

Offline woodshere

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Re: blessing in disguise?
« Reply #63 on: February 07, 2011, 09:10:09 PM »
No problem Mike, it happens to all of us.  One of the joys of internet communicating.
"Let us give pubicity to HV/AIDS and not hide it..." "One of the things destroying people with AIDS is the stigma we attach to it."   Nelson Mandela

Offline kellybryana

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Re: blessing in disguise?
« Reply #64 on: February 08, 2011, 12:28:59 AM »
ALRIGHT! Alright already. HIV sucks. I know it. You know it. We all know it. I'm just trying to make the best of a bad situation, and was looking for some positive feedback and encouragement.

Every time I come on here, I am inundated with horrible negative thoughts, and my innocent question turned into a barrage of attacking responses (or thats how it felt for the most part). Then after a while, it turned into an argument between users. I've seen this happen in a multitude of threads too. Its like the negativity here feeds on itself. Like a virus.

MORE POSITIVITY!!! PLEASE!!!

Offline Hellraiser

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Re: blessing in disguise?
« Reply #65 on: February 08, 2011, 12:34:31 AM »
MORE POSITIVITY!!! PLEASE!!!

We have more than our fair share of that.

Offline Jeff G

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Re: blessing in disguise?
« Reply #66 on: February 08, 2011, 12:37:44 AM »
ALRIGHT! Alright already. HIV sucks. I know it. You know it. We all know it. I'm just trying to make the best of a bad situation, and was looking for some positive feedback and encouragement.

Every time I come on here, I am inundated with horrible negative thoughts, and my innocent question turned into a barrage of attacking responses (or thats how it felt for the most part). Then after a while, it turned into an argument between users. I've seen this happen in a multitude of threads too. Its like the negativity here feeds on itself. Like a virus.

MORE POSITIVITY!!! PLEASE!!!

There is one positive thing in my life since Aids ... no one in my family ask me for a bite of my hamburger anymore .

Seriously ... we were on our best behavior in your thread , you should see us on a bad day  ;)

Offline Matty the Damned

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Re: blessing in disguise?
« Reply #67 on: February 08, 2011, 01:07:45 AM »
ALRIGHT! Alright already. HIV sucks. I know it. You know it. We all know it. I'm just trying to make the best of a bad situation, and was looking for some positive feedback and encouragement.

Every time I come on here, I am inundated with horrible negative thoughts, and my innocent question turned into a barrage of attacking responses (or thats how it felt for the most part). Then after a while, it turned into an argument between users. I've seen this happen in a multitude of threads too. Its like the negativity here feeds on itself. Like a virus.

MORE POSITIVITY!!! PLEASE!!!

Barrage of attacks? Fark! This thread has been like a meeting of the Methodist Ladies' Auxilliary. By our standards this thread is nearly sickening in the depths of it's civility and courtesy.

That can be remedied, of course. :)

MtD

Offline komnaes

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Re: blessing in disguise?
« Reply #68 on: February 08, 2011, 02:07:19 AM »
What I hope I have learned since my own diagnosis (and to a lesser extent the diagnoses of loved ones before my own) is to create and maintain my own positive outlook without having to constantly ask others to give it to me. And if I let a few online comments on an open forum left by strangers to change my mode I seriously don't know how I can survive this virus.

What I do care though are those that are obviously malicious, but I can assure the OP that they are rare (yes, some can get "naughty", but hey, what'd the fun of a forum without them?) and if they do appear you can always count on our wonderful moderators to stamp them out.

And to the OP, I don't think we can find a more supportive and informative online community than this one. But when you post an open question like is HIV a blessing in disguise you cannot expect others who have suffered horribly (both in terms of health, side-effects of meds, mental, losing loved ones, just to name the obvious) to give you only positive feedback.

Just my two cents..
Aug 07 Diagnosed
Oct 07 CD4=446(19%) Feb 08 CD4=421(19%)
Jun 08 CD4=325(22%) Jul 08 CD4=301(18%)
Sep 08 CD4=257/VL=75,000 Oct 08 CD4=347(16%)
Dec 08 CD4=270(16%)
Jan 09 CD4=246(13%)/VL=10,000
Feb 09 CD4=233(15%)/VL=13,000
Started meds Sustiva/Epzicom
May 09 CD4=333(24%)/VL=650
Aug 09 CD4=346(24%)/VL=UD
Nov 09 CD4=437(26%)/VL=UD
Feb 10 CD4=471(31%)/VL=UD
June 10 CD4=517 (28%)/VL=UD
Sept 10 CD4=687 (31%)/VL=UD
Jan 11 CD4=557 (30%)/VL=UD
April 11 CD4=569 (32%)/VL=UD
Switched to Epizcom, Reyataz and Norvir
(Interrupted for 2 months with only Epizcom & Reyataz)
July 11 CD=520 (28%)/VL=UD
Oct 11 CD=771 (31%)/VL=UD(<30)
April 12 CD=609 (28%)/VL=UD(<20)
Aug 12 CD=657 (29%)/VL=UD(<20)
Dec 12 CD=532 (31%)/VL=UD(<20)
May 13 CD=567 (31%)/VL=UD(<20)
Jan 14 CD=521 (21%)/VL=UD(<50)

Offline kellybryana

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Re: blessing in disguise?
« Reply #69 on: February 08, 2011, 02:17:22 AM »
touche sirs

Offline edfu

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Re: blessing in disguise?
« Reply #70 on: February 08, 2011, 02:22:09 AM »
MORE POSITIVITY!!! PLEASE!!!

If you want to be positive, go right ahead.  You have every right to do so.  Just don't expect it from everybody else and, indeed, get upset because they don't agree with you.   They have the same right to have a different opinion. 
"No one will ever be free so long as there are pestilences."--Albert Camus, "The Plague"

"Mankind can never be free until the last brick in the last church falls on the head of the last priest."--Voltaire

Offline kenbar37

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Re: blessing in disguise?
« Reply #71 on: February 10, 2011, 04:05:05 PM »
I have to say during the first few years it was somewhat difficult to deal with, but that was 1990. Now, I do think of it as a blessing! I for the past 20 years have developed a passion that passion, has been helping others. Those who are infected,like myself, and those who are not positive to help to remain negative, and those newly diagnosed to give them hope! I feel that is my responsibility for being positive. And I must say it has been an amazing journey and has allowed me so much in my life that I would not have otherwise had, it has allowed me to work with so many amazing people, that I might have otherwise not met, mush less gain so much knowledge and strength from. Hang in there, and never close yourself off from the gifts that life has to offer!   

Offline skeebo1969

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Re: blessing in disguise?
« Reply #72 on: February 10, 2011, 04:30:59 PM »


   KellyB,

       First let me say-- sister, I like your attitude!

       Blessings are hard to recognize with something like HIV; people's own experience with it's dreadful history helps this. 

       I don't like saying I met my wife because I am positive.  It just doesn't sound right.  But, you know what? It's the truth.   And because of HIV I have a baby.... wait, actually it was because I had unprotected sex again.  You know what I mean though....lol

       I guess other blessings exist, kinda of hard to put my finger on them sometimes though.  Taking life less seriously.... finally being ok with death....  ability to accept others without judgement..... Might these be blessings?  I suppose, for once, I am at peace.... willing to accept whatever happens beyond my control.

      So yeah miss KellyB, I guess there's some silver lining to that dark cloud after all...
I despise the song Love is in the Air, you should too.

Offline kellybryana

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Re: blessing in disguise?
« Reply #73 on: February 10, 2011, 07:09:38 PM »

   KellyB,

       First let me say-- sister, I like your attitude!

       Blessings are hard to recognize with something like HIV; people's own experience with it's dreadful history helps this. 

       I don't like saying I met my wife because I am positive.  It just doesn't sound right.  But, you know what? It's the truth.   And because of HIV I have a baby.... wait, actually it was because I had unprotected sex again.  You know what I mean though....lol

       I guess other blessings exist, kinda of hard to put my finger on them sometimes though.  Taking life less seriously.... finally being ok with death....  ability to accept others without judgement..... Might these be blessings?  I suppose, for once, I am at peace.... willing to accept whatever happens beyond my control.

      So yeah miss KellyB, I guess there's some silver lining to that dark cloud after all...

I have to say during the first few years it was somewhat difficult to deal with, but that was 1990. Now, I do think of it as a blessing! I for the past 20 years have developed a passion that passion, has been helping others. Those who are infected,like myself, and those who are not positive to help to remain negative, and those newly diagnosed to give them hope! I feel that is my responsibility for being positive. And I must say it has been an amazing journey and has allowed me so much in my life that I would not have otherwise had, it has allowed me to work with so many amazing people, that I might have otherwise not met, mush less gain so much knowledge and strength from. Hang in there, and never close yourself off from the gifts that life has to offer!   

Now THATS what I'm talking about!!! Thanks guys, you rock.


Offline Rev. Moon

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Re: blessing in disguise?
« Reply #74 on: February 10, 2011, 07:26:29 PM »
KeelyB, maintain your upbeat way of thinking.  We may be a rowdy bunch, but we are like an extended dysfunctional family.  You'll come to see that, even with our disagreements here and there (whether it is about the way we see HIV or any of the off topic discussions that we frequently have), there are many good people in this place.

Cheers.
"I have tried hard--but life is difficult, and I am a very useless person. I can hardly be said to have an independent existence. I was just a screw or a cog in the great machine I called life, and when I dropped out of it I found I was of no use anywhere else."

Offline Jeff G

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Re: blessing in disguise?
« Reply #75 on: February 10, 2011, 07:29:19 PM »
KeelyB, maintain your upbeat way of thinking.  We may be a rowdy bunch, but we are like an extended dysfunctional family.  You'll come to see that, even with our disagreements here and there (whether it is about the way we see HIV or any of the off topic discussions that we frequently have), there are many good people in this place.

Cheers.

This is true ... and I think threads like this are useful so thanks for starting it . 

Offline Miss Philicia

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Re: blessing in disguise?
« Reply #76 on: February 10, 2011, 07:36:03 PM »
I like AIDS.
"Iíve slept with enough men to know that Iím not gay"

Offline Rev. Moon

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Re: blessing in disguise?
« Reply #77 on: February 10, 2011, 07:44:00 PM »
I like AIDS.

Are you talking again about those delicious classic aids sump toms that we discussed earlier today?
"I have tried hard--but life is difficult, and I am a very useless person. I can hardly be said to have an independent existence. I was just a screw or a cog in the great machine I called life, and when I dropped out of it I found I was of no use anywhere else."

Offline Miss Philicia

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Re: blessing in disguise?
« Reply #78 on: February 10, 2011, 07:45:37 PM »
Are you talking again about those delicious classic aids sump toms that we discussed earlier today?

Yes, I think that's a spicy Szechuan dish, a cousin if you will of won tons.
"Iíve slept with enough men to know that Iím not gay"

Offline kellybryana

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Re: blessing in disguise?
« Reply #79 on: February 10, 2011, 08:03:05 PM »
I like this place...I'm sure I'll get along here just fine.

I'm not just sure, I'm HIV positive!

Offline surf18

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Re: blessing in disguise?
« Reply #80 on: February 10, 2011, 08:13:02 PM »
Kelly you do have a great attitude
Your posts do put me in a good mood
Are you always positive Polly in your life?

Offline Sweet_C

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Re: blessing in disguise?
« Reply #81 on: February 10, 2011, 09:43:40 PM »
Yeah, I definitely can't in any way think of HIV as a "blessing", but I can say that you can still have a great life with it and you don't have to give up any of your dreams.  I've been positive for almost 2.5 years now and my life now is better than it was before.  After I was diagnosed, I got married and I'm expecting my first child.  My job is going well and I really can't complain about anything right now.  

There are many terrible things that can happen to a person, but IMO, HIV is one of the most manageable tragedies.  There are many days where I forget that I have it.  It's such a small part of my daily life now that I'm over the initial shock.  I have my down days every now and then, but mostly I'm living life.  Everything I did before I can do now.  I often compare my disease with my mother, who was diagnosed with stage 4 lung cancer and died 9 months afterward.  It's terrible when you go to the doctor and they tell you that there's nothing they can do for you.  Her treatments were horrid and painful and didn't do anything to help her condition. Dealing with her death made it much easier for me to deal with my new status, because there is just no comparison at all between what she went through and what I'm going through.  So I feel incredibly unlucky and lucky at the same time.  I hate to compare and contrast my lives with others to make myself feel better than my own circumstances....but I can think of a lot of things that I think I would have a harder time dealing with than HIV.  My outlook may have a lot to do with the fact that I found out and was treated early and didn't have to deal with any bad health issues.

I think that in time you won't focus so much on your status and you will go on with your life, but with you will appreciate the good things in life more than you would have otherwise.  I know that I do. You are young and pretty and have your whole life ahead of you.  You have a great attitude, and I know that in time your status may be the thing that motivates you to make the most out of your life.  With HIV, you definitely learn that you are the author of your own life.  Your life can be a tragedy if you want it to be, or an inspirational story of triumph.  It's your choice.  
Tested positive on September 11, 2008

Offline kellybryana

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Re: blessing in disguise?
« Reply #82 on: February 11, 2011, 02:32:21 AM »
Hey surf, I try to be as positive as possible at all times, yes. I have my down times, of course, and I haven't always been like this. I was actually very negative at one point and I loved to play the victim.

I started to make changes after I watched "the Secret" like 3 years ago. It change my life FOREVER. Since then, I've been doing a lot of work in personal growth. By that, I mean, I've been reading a lot of Tony Robbins, Napoleon Hill, John C. Maxwell, Dale Carnegie, Jim Rohn, and Jeff Olsen books.  I also listen to books on tape a lot. My favorite is "The slight edge" by Jeff Olsen. Its not called "self help" for no reason. HELP YOURSELF!!! By having a positive mental attitude, you can change everything in your life.  ;D

Offline edfu

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Re: blessing in disguise?
« Reply #83 on: February 11, 2011, 02:51:37 AM »
Quod erat demonstrandum.
"No one will ever be free so long as there are pestilences."--Albert Camus, "The Plague"

"Mankind can never be free until the last brick in the last church falls on the head of the last priest."--Voltaire

Offline Matty the Damned

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Re: blessing in disguise?
« Reply #84 on: February 11, 2011, 04:30:35 AM »
Hey surf, I try to be as positive as possible at all times, yes. I have my down times, of course, and I haven't always been like this. I was actually very negative at one point and I loved to play the victim.

I started to make changes after I watched "the Secret" like 3 years ago. It change my life FOREVER. Since then, I've been doing a lot of work in personal growth. By that, I mean, I've been reading a lot of Tony Robbins, Napoleon Hill, John C. Maxwell, Dale Carnegie, Jim Rohn, and Jeff Olsen books.  I also listen to books on tape a lot. My favorite is "The slight edge" by Jeff Olsen. Its not called "self help" for no reason. HELP YOURSELF!!! By having a positive mental attitude, you can change everything in your life.  ;D

Yairs. Not everyone derives great comfort from all that stuff.

Barbara Ehrenreich certainly didn't.

When author Barbara Ehrenreich was diagnosed with breast cancer she found the emphasis on positive thinking a burden rather than a support.

She describes positive thinking as an ideological force in American culture that is denying reality and promoting individual rather than social solutions to problems. She advocates a return to realism and critical thinking.


(Download Audio)

MtD

Offline skeebo1969

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Re: blessing in disguise?
« Reply #85 on: February 11, 2011, 07:53:55 AM »

   I had a dream once that Tony Robbins offered me a million dollars to sleep with my wife and didn't pay up after..  Personally for me, I like watching old Chuck Norris movies for my motivation and positive attitude.  How's it working?
I despise the song Love is in the Air, you should too.

Offline surf18

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Re: blessing in disguise?
« Reply #86 on: February 11, 2011, 08:11:51 AM »
thats funny you mention the secret kelly. i had read that four years ago and got really into the law of attraction. then it sorted of faded from my life. so when i was dx'd this summer. i told my mom , "mom get me that book the secret right now,i cant find mine" and i focused on the lady that beat breast cancer without treatment , and i went on vacation right after dx and i spend a week doing the law of attract thing. to be honest i believe it saved my life after dx. i was in bad shape and needed some sort of hope and the law of attract helped me through it. every night after i read this board i then read the powerful intentions law of attraction board before bed. puts my mind in a good place before bed.

Offline leatherman

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Re: blessing in disguise?
« Reply #87 on: February 11, 2011, 04:18:30 PM »
There are many terrible things that can happen to a person, but IMO, HIV is one of the most manageable tragedies.  There are many days where I forget that I have it.  It's such a small part of my daily life now that I'm over the initial shock.  I have my down days every now and then, but mostly I'm living life.
Thankfully there can be a great difference in the lives and situations of someone diagnosed and starting treatment nowadays than compared to someone who has had to deal with HIV or AIDS for many years.

However, not pointing these following comments at anyone in particular but just to the members thinking that somehow having a terminal disease has a good side or that it's a manageable situation, I would like to point out a fallacy of thinking this is a manageable.

Currently there are 6001 Americans who qualify financially and who need antiretrovirals based upon lab results and CDC guidelines who are on waiting lists. Although many are temporarily finding medications through other means, many who should be taking meds to fight HIV and stay alive have no access to meds.

As the weeks go by more and more states are failing or are unable to provide the proper support, and people who have been receiving support for their meds find that support taken away. Within the next few weeks, over 6500 people in Florida will be dropped from their bankrupt ADAP system. Thankfully a one-time stop-gap action (headed by the small non-profit org of Welvista in SC) will be taken to keep these people on meds but when this problem happens again in FY2012 there will probably be no help next time. Contrary to what some say, although the meds will be distributed through the ADAP system - FL ADAP will be bankrupt and will NOT be providing any medications.

Wednesday at the State House in Columbia SC, I was part of a rally demanding that our state legislators restore funding to ADAP after they slashed it so drastically this past year. There are currently 389 in SC alone who are on the waiting list. I and others from my ASO, none of whom is actually using ADAP or on the waiting list, spoke directly with 4 of our state legislators trying to get them to vote to provide adequate funding for ADAP, so that our fellow citizens could have the medications that would keep them from dying. And that's not just hyperbole. When this similar situation happened back in 2006, four people in South Carolina died from HIV while waiting for meds. Already one person on the wait list this time has lost her life.

With the 3085 already on the FL waiting list and another 6500 dropped that's 9585 people in Florida alone in jeopardy of having no meds. South Carolina only has 4% of that total and has held 3 rallies in the last year. I have yet to hear of any rallies in Florida where the people there are fighting to keep the drugs that will sustain their lives, but I hope they do. Nearly 10,0000 pozzies matching into Tallahassee would be quite a sight.

That's just so hard for me to understand. While some want to see blessings from being positive and others want to see it as something manageable, there are other Americans growing sicker without meds, and others losing access to meds this month. (Virginia is considering dropping it's entire ADAP membership in the hopes that Medicaid or the pharmaceutical companies will come in and save everyone's lives!)

Might I suggest that for those that are lucky enough to have access to meds, to be lucky to have found the right regimen and are lucky enough to experience little bad from being HIV positive, that you take advantage of your health and become an activist fighting to get and keep access to medications for others who aren't as fortunate or who are much sicker and unable to fight to save their own lives. You may find yourself in this boat one day and may wish the government was there to offer access to life-sustaining antiretrovirals.
leatherman (aka mIkIE)


chart from 1992-2013; updated 2/09/13  Reyataz/Norvir/Truvada

Offline newt

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Re: blessing in disguise?
« Reply #88 on: February 11, 2011, 04:27:25 PM »
Quote
Currently there are 6001 Americans who qualify financially and who need antiretrovirals based upon lab results and CDC guidelines who are on waiting lists.

Yet the Federal Govmt can find the money to beat the shit out a few opium poppy growers.

Terrible.

Us "socialist" Europeans (have you been here recently?) don't have this problem. It makes me angry. The 2012 International AIDS Conference is gonna be a humdinger if this ain't sorted out.

Soz, not very helpful, just indignant

- matt
"The object is to be a well patient, not a good patient"

Offline bmancanfly

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Re: blessing in disguise?
« Reply #89 on: February 11, 2011, 06:07:06 PM »
It doesn't seem likely that ,  in this political and economic environment,  that things will improve on that front.   I think it is going to be a long time before we see resources available increasing again.

Maybe the solution is to find a more efficient and equitable benefit delivery system - thereby enabling more people to be covered.

"The trouble with the world is that the stupid are cocksure and the intelligent are full of doubt."

 Bertrand Russell

Offline Joe K

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Re: blessing in disguise?
« Reply #90 on: February 11, 2011, 09:45:26 PM »
Maybe the solution is to find a more efficient and equitable benefit delivery system - thereby enabling more people to be covered.

It's called Universal Health Care and for what we spend on our medical system, we could still have a first rate system at a much lower cost. Nothing will change until you take the "profit" out of health care. Drug companies and health corporations are making record profits, as they continue to suck every dollar they can, out of our system. Drop the drug patents, go generic and don't believe them when they tell you they spend all their profits on research, because they do not. They spend it on marketing their drugs, so they can make more money.

Someday, Americans will finally demand universal health care, but until then, the sad fact remains, that in America, some live are indeed worth less than others.

Offline sharkdiver

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Re: blessing in disguise?
« Reply #91 on: February 11, 2011, 09:48:29 PM »
How come I didn't get AIDS-lite ?

Offline Matty the Damned

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Re: blessing in disguise?
« Reply #92 on: February 11, 2011, 09:55:48 PM »
How come I didn't get AIDS-lite ?

We were all out of Diet HIV that day.

MtD

Offline eric48

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Re: blessing in disguise?
« Reply #93 on: February 11, 2011, 11:25:01 PM »
Someday, Americans will finally demand universal health care...

mentioning universal health care makes a lot of tense in this discussion because it certainly makes a big difference in the perspective and relationship that a newly infected/diagnosed has with regards to the condition.

The cost in universal health care is a real burden for us (the European 'Socialists') in the global economic competition and has a direct impact on our unemployment rates (chronically higher), but I must admit we get PREMIUM attention/monitoring/choice of combos, etc.

HIV is a lot of worries and it is a blessing when you do not have to worry about the cost associated.

UHC  IS a BLESSING and it shows!

Cheers!

Eric
« Last Edit: February 11, 2011, 11:35:18 PM by eric48 »
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Offline Ann

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Re: blessing in disguise?
« Reply #94 on: February 12, 2011, 03:18:53 AM »

The cost in universal health care is a real burden for us (the European 'Socialists') in the global economic competition and has a direct impact on our unemployment rates (chronically higher), but I must admit we get PREMIUM attention/monitoring/choice of combos, etc.


Got some links to back that up? I'm not saying you're wrong, I just want to know how you came to that conclusion.
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"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline kellybryana

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Re: blessing in disguise?
« Reply #95 on: February 12, 2011, 03:39:51 AM »
So how do we in America go about getting some of this UHC?

I'm all for socialism. I think the world would be a better place if it were run in a socialist manner. I'm really distraught about Florida losing ADAP funding. I really want to do something about this! What can I do?

Offline Hellraiser

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Re: blessing in disguise?
« Reply #96 on: February 12, 2011, 03:53:15 AM »
So how do we in America go about getting some of this UHC?

I'm all for socialism. I think the world would be a better place if it were run in a socialist manner. I'm really distraught about Florida losing ADAP funding. I really want to do something about this! What can I do?

Healthcare in America is all kinds of jacked up.

Offline Ann

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Re: blessing in disguise?
« Reply #97 on: February 12, 2011, 03:59:47 AM »
So how do we in America go about getting some of this UHC?


Move to the UK? I did! :)
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"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline Hellraiser

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Re: blessing in disguise?
« Reply #98 on: February 12, 2011, 04:05:42 AM »
Move to the UK? I did! :)

Sure, marry me and let's enter into a loveless marriage for the healthcare.  Out of curiosity does that even work for a citizen who moved there and acquired citizenship?

Offline Ann

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Re: blessing in disguise?
« Reply #99 on: February 12, 2011, 04:43:07 AM »
Sure, marry me and let's enter into a loveless marriage for the healthcare.  Out of curiosity does that even work for a citizen who moved there and acquired citizenship?

Sorry mate, I'm never going to marry again and if by some fit of insanity I did, it wouldn't be you. Just the way it goes! You'll have to find some other fool someone else.

I married a Brit in NYC in '84, but we didn't move over here until '91. I had to produce a stack of info - basically my whole life's story - for the UK consulate in NYC and get it all arranged before I came over. Once we got here, we were all (daughter included) covered under the NHS. Don't ask me the detail, it was 20 years ago. I'm lucky if I remember what I had for breakfast yesterday.

But marrying me wouldn't work anyway - I do not hold a British passport. Yet. Haven't gotten around to it.
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"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

 


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