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Author Topic: Have you read " I am HIV Positive and I Don't Blame Anybody--Including Myself?  (Read 1475 times)

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Offline leatherman

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thank u 4 that link, Em. (you do tend to usually post interesting articles and links ;) ) I enjoyed the article and the comments. interesting food 4 thought to use talking prevention/education when out-n-about working in the general public.
leatherman (aka mIkIE)

All the stars are flashing high above the sea
and the party is on fire around you and me
We're gonna burn this disco down before the morning comes
- Pet Shop Boys

chart from 1992-2015

Offline richie

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It's a well-written, well-thought out article, and thanks for posting the link.  But I think it has some glaring gaps I wish he would have covered.  One issue briefly touched on is precisely the reason we tend to remain silent about our status to friends and family:

"The communication problems that help drive these trends don’t stop with finding monsters to blame. People I love and talk to about my status do not always have the language or tools to express their grief and worry. They ask things like, “How could you be so irresponsible?” Or, “How could you fuck up like this?”

This language hurts, but more importantly it shifts the discussion from meaningful conversation about risk and vulnerability to simplistic directives: if only people used condoms, transmission would cease. But this idea relies on a complicated array of misconceptions and idealistic assumptions of equality, equal access to information, and how to use that information to stay HIV negative. "

It would have been very useful for Kirk to dig a bit deeper and talk about HOW to deal with these issues of blame, rather than just acknowledge that they exist.


Offline Jody

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Thanks em for your (always) productive posts and the fine responses thus far.  It brings to mind though the almost daily rituals or just the stuff of life we all do and how being HIV+ has affected those we love.  Their sadness, acceptance, anger, resignation, hurt, gratitude and of course love are the myriad of emotions that our being poz creates and is all too relevant to many of us all the time.

I wonder what others such as Andy Velez might add.

"Wake up to find out that you are the eyes of the world".
 "Try to discover that you are the song that the morning brings."

Grateful Dead

Offline Andy Velez

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The choice of words is very important. Reading this article immediately makes me think of how often when someone reveals they are gay, it is written of or spoken of in the media as that person having "admitted" they are gay.

Which to me immediately sounds pejorative as if they are confessing something they have done wrong rather than just having stated a fact, a truth about their life.

When was the last time it was news that someone "admitted" to being a heterosexual? They just are.  Whatever we are, we just are.

The stigma still associated with HIV is enduring and insidious. I do think an article like this is good because I see it as being about the reality and the challenge of living with the virus rather than looking for anyone to blame for having it.

We will do better in halting the epidemic when we stop demonizing people. Then we can work more committedly on resolving the other resistances to universal availability of needed healthcare as well as making safer sex practices and clean needles an everyday reality.      
« Last Edit: January 27, 2011, 08:49:30 AM by Andy Velez »
Andy Velez


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