Quantcast

Subscribe to:
POZ magazine
Newsletters
Join POZ: Facebook MySpace Twitter Pinterest
Tumblr Google+ Flickr Instagram
POZ Personals
Sign In / Join
Username:
Password:
Welcome, Guest. Please login or register.
October 22, 2014, 06:47:01 PM

Login with username, password and session length


Members
Stats
  • Total Posts: 643113
  • Total Topics: 48933
  • Online Today: 228
  • Online Ever: 585
  • (January 07, 2014, 02:31:47 PM)
Users Online

Welcome


Welcome to the POZ/AIDSmeds Community Forums, a round-the-clock discussion area for people with HIV/AIDS, their friends/family/caregivers, and others concerned about HIV/AIDS.  Click on the links below to browse our various forums; scroll down for a glance at the most recent posts; or join in the conversation yourself by registering on the left side of this page.

Privacy Warning:  Please realize that these forums are open to all, and are fully searchable via Google and other search engines. If you are HIV positive and disclose this in our forums, then it is almost the same thing as telling the whole world (or at least the World Wide Web). If this concerns you, then do not use a username or avatar that are self-identifying in any way. We do not allow the deletion of anything you post in these forums, so think before you post.

  • The information shared in these forums, by moderators and members, is designed to complement, not replace, the relationship between an individual and his/her own physician.

  • All members of these forums are, by default, not considered to be licensed medical providers. If otherwise, users must clearly define themselves as such.

  • Forums members must behave at all times with respect and honesty. Posting guidelines, including time-out and banning policies, have been established by the moderators of these forums. Click here for “Am I Infected?” posting guidelines. Click here for posting guidelines pertaining to all other POZ/AIDSmeds community forums.

  • We ask all forums members to provide references for health/medical/scientific information they provide, when it is not a personal experience being discussed. Please provide hyperlinks with full URLs or full citations of published works not available via the Internet. Additionally, all forums members must post information which are true and correct to their knowledge.

  • Product advertisement—including links; banners; editorial content; and clinical trial, study or survey participation—is strictly prohibited by forums members unless permission has been secured from POZ.

To change forums navigation language settings, click here (members only), Register now

Para cambiar sus preferencias de los foros en español, haz clic aquí (sólo miembros), Regístrate ahora

Finished Reading This? You can collapse this or any other box on this page by clicking the symbol in each box.

Welcome to Am I Infected

IMPORTANT UPDATE
Posted Tuesday, August 28, 2012

Welcome to the "Am I Infected?" POZ forum.

New members -- those who have posted three or fewer messages -- are permitted to post questions and responses, free of charge (make them count!). Ongoing participation in the "Am I Infected?" forum -- posting more than three questions or responses -- requires a paid subscription.

A seven-day subscription is $9.99, a 30-day subscription is $14.99 and a 90-day subscription is $24.99.

Anyone who needs to post more than three messages in the "Am I Infected?" forum -- including past, present and future POZ Forums members -- will need to subscribe, with secure payments made via PayPal.

There will be no charge to continue reading threads in the "Am I Infected?" forum, nor will there be a charge for participating in any of the Main Forums; Meds, Mind, Body & Benefits; and Off Topic Forums. Similarly, all POZ and AIDSmeds pages, including our "How is HIV Transmitted?" and "Am I Infected? (A Guide to Testing for HIV)" lessons, will remain accessible to all. 

NOTE: HIV testing questions will still need to be posted in the "Am I Infected?" forum; attempts to post HIV symptoms or testing questions in any other forums will be considered violations of our rules of membership and subject to time-outs and permanent bans.

To learn how to upgrade your Forums account to participate beyond three posts in the "Am I Infected?" Forum, please click here.

Thank you for your understanding and future support of the best online support service for people living with, affected by and at risk for HIV.

Author Topic: Risk of oral sex with chapped lips?  (Read 11992 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Offline Person9991

  • Member
  • Posts: 20
Risk of oral sex with chapped lips?
« on: January 25, 2011, 06:35:49 PM »
At the end of November, I had sex with both a man and a female escort.  I had unprotected oral sex with both, with no ejaculation involved.  We had mutual masturbation as well.  I also had protected intercourse with both.  I know oral sex is not very risky, but I snorted so much amphetamines and drank so  much on that night that my throat was completly raw.

Three days later I developped swollen lymph nodes and horrible joint pain.  Then came diarrhea and stomach cramps.  Afterwards I had a sore throat for 10 days and painful lymph nodes.  Went to the doctor and was tested for mono, strep and gonorrhea. 

Both the mono test and strep came back positive.   I took antibiotics for the strep throat but the pain in the throat never went away. 

A month later, I was diagnosed with pneumonia.  Took antibiotics again.  Monospot came back positive again (they are not very specific test btw...HIV can produce false positive monospot tests)

And now, almost two months later, I still have random joint pain, a VERY annoying sore throat, painful lymph nodes and general fatigue. 

It feels like the beginning of a cold every single day.  It's like groundhog day.  Never better, never worse. 

I am getting tested next week.  I am terrified this might be the early symptoms of primary HIV infection.  I am depressed and anxious and at times suicidal.  Please tell me what are my risks here  :'(

Offline RapidRod

  • Member
  • Posts: 15,288
Re: Oral sex risky with irritated throat?
« Reply #1 on: January 25, 2011, 07:01:47 PM »
You don't have an HIV concern. You never had an exposure.

Offline Person9991

  • Member
  • Posts: 20
Re: Oral sex risky with irritated throat?
« Reply #2 on: January 25, 2011, 08:11:18 PM »
I would've expected a 'fatter' reply.   ???

Offline RapidRod

  • Member
  • Posts: 15,288
Re: Oral sex risky with irritated throat?
« Reply #3 on: January 25, 2011, 08:19:32 PM »
What would you like for me to add?You didn't have a risk so I don't think you can be given a clearer answer than that.

Offline Matty the Damned

  • Member
  • Posts: 12,228
  • Ninja Please
Re: Oral sex risky with irritated throat?
« Reply #4 on: January 25, 2011, 08:20:12 PM »
I would've expected a 'fatter' reply.   ???

Well that's the problem with expectations, they are so often not met.

I agree with Rodney. You were not at risk of contracting HIV from this sexual encounter. HIV is transmitted via unprotected anal and vaginal sex, from sharing contaminated needles and syringes and in some cases from HIV positive mother to her unborn or breast feeding infant.

Regarding oral sex there is a theoretical risk involved to a person who performs unprotected oral sex on an HIV positive man that involves ejaculation. To date there are no documented cases of HIV being transmitted in this way.

If you wish to be tested for HIV, you can do so 13 weeks from the date of this encounter. Your expectation in that regard should be of a negative result.

Is that reponse "fat" enough for you?

MtD

Offline Person9991

  • Member
  • Posts: 20
Re: Oral sex risky with irritated throat?
« Reply #5 on: January 25, 2011, 08:24:52 PM »
Well that's the problem with expectations, they are so often not met.

I agree with Rodney. You were not at risk of contracting HIV from this sexual encounter. HIV is transmitted via unprotected anal and vaginal sex, from sharing contaminated needles and syringes and in some cases from HIV positive mother to her unborn or breast feeding infant.

Regarding oral sex there is a theoretical risk involved to a person who performs unprotected oral sex on an HIV positive man that involves ejaculation. To date there are no documented cases of HIV being transmitted in this way.

If you wish to be tested for HIV, you can do so 13 weeks from the date of this encounter. Your expectation in that regard should be of a negative result.

Is that reponse "fat" enough for you?

MtD

Thank you.  It's reassuring that's for sure.  I've been so sick  :-\

Offline Person9991

  • Member
  • Posts: 20
Re: Oral sex risky with irritated throat?
« Reply #6 on: January 25, 2011, 09:57:58 PM »
I know 3 months is conclusive, but is testing at the 9th week a good indicator or is it completly unreliable?

Offline jkinatl2

  • Member
  • Posts: 6,007
  • Doo. Dah. Dipp-ity.
Re: Oral sex risky with irritated throat?
« Reply #7 on: January 25, 2011, 10:05:56 PM »
I know 3 months is conclusive, but is testing at the 9th week a good indicator or is it completly unreliable?

You have had no risk for HIV, so a test at any time would be considered reliable.

"Many people, especially in the gay community, turn to oral sex as a safer alternative in the age of AIDS. And with HIV rates rising, people need to remember that oral sex is safer sex. It's a reasonable alternative."

-Kimberly Page-Shafer, PhD, MPH

Welcome Thread

Offline Person9991

  • Member
  • Posts: 20
Re: Oral sex risky with irritated throat?
« Reply #8 on: January 26, 2011, 11:15:06 AM »
You guys ever heard of someone getting infected with HIV orally?  One of my best friend is a gay porn star.  He never does bareback sex but they still require him to test every 3 months.  And I hear a lot of conflicting opinions on oral sex when speaking to medical personel.  Your average nurse says it's risky, nurses specialized in STDs say it's low risk, some doctors told me not to worry (or even test), others tell me it's necessary to get tested..  Information on the web is just as contradictory.  

I am not trying to furthermore feed my anxiety here, but I think if people can't get over HIV anxiety is that there doesn't seem to be one single reliable source of information.

I wonder how people come up with numbers like that you have 1 chances out of 200 to get infected if you have unprotected anal sex with a positive person when people can't even agree on oral sex.

There should be some type of official online hub about HIV that has definitive answers to these questions so that people like myself don't have to go around the web, finding conflicting data that makes you go crazy.

Offline RapidRod

  • Member
  • Posts: 15,288
Re: Oral sex risky with irritated throat?
« Reply #9 on: January 26, 2011, 11:39:01 AM »
■Anyone who continues to post excessively, questioning a conclusive negative result or no-risk situation, will be subject to a four week Time Out (a temporary ban from the Forums). If you continue to post excessively after one Time Out, you may be given a second Time Out which will last eight weeks. There is no third Time Out - it is a permanent ban. The purpose of a Time Out is to encourage you to seek the face-to-face help we cannot provide on this forum.

Offline Person9991

  • Member
  • Posts: 20
Re: Oral sex risky with irritated throat?
« Reply #10 on: January 26, 2011, 11:57:37 AM »
I didn't question anything here.  

I'm not talking about my 'no-risk situation'.  

I am discussing the presence of conflicting data, which creates confusion for people.  I am saying it's unfortunate people can't go somewhere for definitive answers on HIV.  I'm saying something should be done about that.

If you don't want to join the conversation, fine, but keep your rules to yourself because I haven't broke any.   I have the right to chat it up.   People do it all the time on these forums.  

I know who you are.  I've seen you on medhelp.org.  You bully people who are trying to make sense of all the confusion information they have.  

People are allowed to talk without you acting as moderator (your profile says 'member' and so does mine btw).  

If you don't want to answer people, you shouldn't say anything.   Take your anger to politics forums.  Trying to intimidate people who have health concerns is irresponsible.

Edit: Btw, I know for a fact that you do not even read threads.  You simply copy&paste rules to anyone who replies after you.  And you do this on multiple forums, 24/7.  Quite the hobby you have.  I guess that explains why so many members ignore you.
« Last Edit: January 26, 2011, 12:03:58 PM by Person9991 »

Offline RapidRod

  • Member
  • Posts: 15,288
Re: Oral sex risky with irritated throat?
« Reply #11 on: January 26, 2011, 12:03:06 PM »
People get banned all the time from this forum too. This forum is for assessments and you were given yours and you didn't have a risk and no this is not a chat forum.

Offline David Evans

  • member
  • Member
  • Posts: 97
Re: Oral sex risky with irritated throat?
« Reply #12 on: January 26, 2011, 12:07:45 PM »
Person,

I received your complaint, but Rapid Rod is spot on. This is a restricted forum so that people can assess their own person risk with the help of trained staff and volunteers, and review their options. This is not a chat room, there are other places for that, and there is plenty of written information online...including--and especially--the information on the AIDSmeds website.

You've had your personal risk assessed and you don't have any. Our rules explicitly state that continuing to post after the authorized staff answer your question is a grounds for being banned. If you wish to remain a member of the forums, then read and honor the rules.

David
Moderator


Offline Person9991

  • Member
  • Posts: 20
Re: Oral sex risky with irritated throat?
« Reply #13 on: January 26, 2011, 12:17:52 PM »
Person,

I received your complaint, but Rapid Rod is spot on. This is a restricted forum so that people can assess their own person risk with the help of trained staff and volunteers, and review their options. This is not a chat room, there are other places for that, and there is plenty of written information online...including--and especially--the information on the AIDSmeds website.

You've had your personal risk assessed and you don't have any. Our rules explicitly state that continuing to post after the authorized staff answer your question is a grounds for being banned. If you wish to remain a member of the forums, then read and honor the rules.

David
Moderator



Weird, because I've read a lot of threads in the different forums (with actual HIV+ people) of this website and there is A LOT of small talk going on.  The truth is that this Rapid Rod fella isn't interested in sharing information.  He simply enjoys shutting down people who are concerned about their status.  Their anxiety probably amuse him.  His spamming of threats on multiple forums is quite spectacular.

Offline Andy Velez

  • Global Moderator
  • Member
  • Posts: 24,894
Re: Oral sex risky with irritated throat?
« Reply #14 on: January 26, 2011, 12:19:02 PM »
It's also worth repeating that despite the reports from time to time of someone insisting they became infected through oral sex, the claims never seem to hold up under careful examination. People either have inaccurate memories or are embarassed about what they actually did or leave out important details.

Oral sex is one of the most common of sexual activities. If it was a genuine risk such as unprotected anal or vaginal intercourse, we would have known that long before today.

While I appreciate your concern over the various opinions that are offered on the web and elsewhere, our position is that it remains only a theoretical rather than a confirmed risk.

With that in mind we're not interested in having repetitous back and forths about what you have been told or read elsewhere. You don't have to accept our position but that's it so let's move on.

Your comments about Rod are duly noted. You're entitled to have your opinion about Rod but let's not go down any further down a negative road about that. He is a longtime member and has helped any number of people with their questions. If you don't like what he says just put him on Ignore.
« Last Edit: January 26, 2011, 12:21:23 PM by Andy Velez »
Andy Velez

Offline Person9991

  • Member
  • Posts: 20
Re: Oral sex risky with irritated throat?
« Reply #15 on: January 26, 2011, 12:34:31 PM »
It's also worth repeating that despite the reports from time to time of someone insisting they became infected through oral sex, the claims never seem to hold up under careful examination. People either have inaccurate memories or are embarassed about what they actually did or leave out important details.

Oral sex is one of the most common of sexual activities. If it was a genuine risk such as unprotected anal or vaginal intercourse, we would have known that long before today.

While I appreciate your concern over the various opinions that are offered on the web and elsewhere, our position is that it remains only a theoretical rather than a confirmed risk.

With that in mind we're not interested in having repetitous back and forths about what you have been told or read elsewhere. You don't have to accept our position but that's it so let's move on.

Your comments about Rod are duly noted. You're entitled to have your opinion about Rod but let's not go down any further down a negative road about that. He is a longtime member and has helped any number of people with their questions. If you don't like what he says just put him on Ignore.

I wasn't even questionning your position that it's only a theoritical risk.  I was wondering why people can't settle on these matters when on the other hand, they can give relatively accurate estimates about other routes of transmission.  Doesn't make sense to me.   And I was wondering if there's a reliable authority on HIV because there seems to be a lot of misconception. 

Even my last doctor was mixed up about it.  She said: "HIV will take at least 3  to 6 months to incubate so you're symptoms have to be mono".  I was not impressed.

The nurse I called told me I didn't even have to test. 

I once talked to a doctor after an unprotected oral sex exposure a few years ago who absolutely insisted that I get tested because he said it was high risk.  It was in a clinic specialized in STDs in the middle of our local gay village.  You'd think he would know a thing or two about HIV.  Or maybe he was incompetent?

All I'm saying is...why so many myths?


Offline Ann

  • Administrator
  • Member
  • Posts: 28,140
  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: Oral sex risky with irritated throat?
« Reply #16 on: January 26, 2011, 01:14:57 PM »
Person,

There are many myths and misconceptions surrounding hiv because it has to do with sexual activity and many people are squeamish or even downright judgemental when it comes to sexual behaviours.

Many people have claimed to have been infected via oral sex over the years, but none of the cases ever stand up to scientific, medical scrutiny. Patient report is very unreliable when it comes to modes of hiv transmission for many reasons. Some are too embarrassed to admit to something like unprotected (or even protected) anal intercourse. Some people don't remember what they got up to when they were under the influence of drink and/or drugs.

However, there have been three long-term studies of couples where one is positive and one is negative. In the couples who used condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, but no barrier for oral activities, not one of the negative partners became infected with hiv. Not one. These studies are much more reliable than patient report.

It's a shame that so many medical practitioners don't have a clue about hiv. Hiv doesn't "incubate" for three to six months. The vast majority of people who have actually been infected will seroconvert and test positive by six weeks, with the average time to seroconversion being only 22 days. A negative six week result is highly unlikely to change, but must be confirmed at the three month point.

As you have been told, you did not have a risk for hiv infection, therefore you are not in a window period for hiv testing.

You HAVE tested positive for mono. It can take months to recover from mono. Keep working with your doctor to alleviate your mono symptoms.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline Person9991

  • Member
  • Posts: 20
Re: Oral sex risky with irritated throat?
« Reply #17 on: January 26, 2011, 02:32:35 PM »
Person,

There are many myths and misconceptions surrounding hiv because it has to do with sexual activity and many people are squeamish or even downright judgemental when it comes to sexual behaviours.

Many people have claimed to have been infected via oral sex over the years, but none of the cases ever stand up to scientific, medical scrutiny. Patient report is very unreliable when it comes to modes of hiv transmission for many reasons. Some are too embarrassed to admit to something like unprotected (or even protected) anal intercourse. Some people don't remember what they got up to when they were under the influence of drink and/or drugs.

However, there have been three long-term studies of couples where one is positive and one is negative. In the couples who used condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, but no barrier for oral activities, not one of the negative partners became infected with hiv. Not one. These studies are much more reliable than patient report.

It's a shame that so many medical practitioners don't have a clue about hiv. Hiv doesn't "incubate" for three to six months. The vast majority of people who have actually been infected will seroconvert and test positive by six weeks, with the average time to seroconversion being only 22 days. A negative six week result is highly unlikely to change, but must be confirmed at the three month point.

As you have been told, you did not have a risk for hiv infection, therefore you are not in a window period for hiv testing.

You HAVE tested positive for mono. It can take months to recover from mono. Keep working with your doctor to alleviate your mono symptoms.

Ann

Thank you.  It's reassuring to know studies were made on serodiscordant people.  It's too bad these studies are not put forward more.  I've never stumbled on them.   :-\

Yes, I have tested for mono twice but the monospot is not a very reliable test.  It can be faulted by a lot of diseases, especially acute HIV, which is why I didn't trust it.  Not only that. my GF doesn't have it and the fact that my symptoms started after this little adventure (i don't believe in coincidence) is what made me panick about HIV. 

On the other hand, the never ending recovery seems to go along with mono, whereas I'm told HIV primary symptoms do not last that long.  And I'm a lot less anxious after having been convinced that oral sex risks are so low that they are not worth worrying about.  Which is why I wish there was a real place for concerned people to go instead of having to gather wrong information by ourselves.  I had some pretty intense panic attacks after having read bad information.  I started taking steps to kill myself at one point.

I'm still looking forward for my test results though.  I'm sure I will get a little boost when I see the actual results on paper and I could definitly need a little energy lately.   

Offline Matty the Damned

  • Member
  • Posts: 12,228
  • Ninja Please
Re: Oral sex risky with irritated throat?
« Reply #18 on: January 26, 2011, 02:38:54 PM »
Thank you.  It's reassuring to know studies were made on serodiscordant people.  It's too bad these studies are not put forward more.  I've never stumbled on them.   :-\

Yes, I have tested for mono twice but the monospot is not a very reliable test.  It can be faulted by a lot of diseases, especially acute HIV, which is why I didn't trust it.  Not only that. my GF doesn't have it and the fact that my symptoms started after this little adventure (i don't believe in coincidence) is what made me panick about HIV. 

On the other hand, the never ending recovery seems to go along with mono, whereas I'm told HIV primary symptoms do not last that long.  And I'm a lot less anxious after having been convinced that oral sex risks are so low that they are not worth worrying about.  Which is why I wish there was a real place for concerned people to go instead of having to gather wrong information by ourselves.  I had some pretty intense panic attacks after having read bad information.  I started taking steps to kill myself at one point.

I'm still looking forward for my test results though.  I'm sure I will get a little boost when I see the actual results on paper and I could definitly need a little energy lately.   

If you've been considering suicide you should seek some professional  face--to-face mental health support. Please be aware that we are not able to provide that sort of support here.

MtD

Offline jkinatl2

  • Member
  • Posts: 6,007
  • Doo. Dah. Dipp-ity.
Re: Oral sex risky with irritated throat?
« Reply #19 on: January 26, 2011, 02:46:04 PM »
Some of the studies in question:

No incident HIV infections among MSM who practice exclusively oral sex.
Int Conf AIDS 2004 Jul 11-16; 15:(abstract no. WePpC2072)??Balls JE, Evans JL, Dilley J, Osmond D, Shiboski S, Shiboski C, Klausner J, McFarland W, Greenspan D, Page-Shafer K?University of California, San Francisco, San Francisco, United States

Oral transmission of HIV, reality or fiction? An update
J Campo1, MA Perea1, J del Romero2, J Cano1, V Hernando2, A Bascones1
Oral Diseases (2006) 12, 219–228

AIDS:  Volume 16(17)  22 November 2002  pp 2350-2352
Risk of HIV infection attributable to oral sex among men who have sex with men and in the population of men who have sex with men

Page-Shafer, Kimberlya,b; Shiboski, Caroline Hb; Osmond, Dennis Hc; Dilley, Jamesd; McFarland, Willie; Shiboski, Steve Cc; Klausner, Jeffrey De; Balls, Joycea; Greenspan, Deborahb; Greenspan

Page-Shafer K, Veugelers PJ, Moss AR, Strathdee S, Kaldor JM, van Griensven GJ. Sexual risk behavior and risk factors for HIV-1 seroconversion in homosexual men participating in the Tricontinental Seroconverter Study, 1982-1994 [published erratum appears in Am J Epidemiol 1997 15 Dec; 146(12):1076]. Am J Epidemiol 1997, 146:531-542.

Studies which show the fallacy of relying on anecdotal evidence as opposed to carefully controlled study insofar as HIV transmission risk is concerned:

Jenicek M. "Clinical Case Reporting" in Evidence-Based Medicine. Oxford: Butterworth–Heinemann; 1999:117

Saltzman SP, Stoddard AM, McCusker J, Moon MW, Mayer KH. Reliability of self-reported sexual behavior risk factors for HIV infection in homosexual men. Public Health Rep. 1987 102(6):692–697.Nov–Dec;

Catania JA, Gibson DR, Chitwood DD, Coates TJ. Methodological problems in AIDS behavioral research: influences on measurement error and participation bias in studies of sexual behavior. Psychol Bull. 1990 Nov;108(3):339–362.
"Many people, especially in the gay community, turn to oral sex as a safer alternative in the age of AIDS. And with HIV rates rising, people need to remember that oral sex is safer sex. It's a reasonable alternative."

-Kimberly Page-Shafer, PhD, MPH

Welcome Thread

Offline Person9991

  • Member
  • Posts: 20
Re: Oral sex risky with irritated throat?
« Reply #20 on: January 31, 2011, 09:35:47 AM »
Thanks for those studies. 

One more question for my personal understanding.

I read everywhere that ARS causes mononuclesosis-like symptoms.  But ARS lasts, apparently only 1-3 weeks while mono seems to last forever. 

Why don't they just say that it causes flu-like symptoms or can ARS linger on for months like mono?

I'm not quite getting it.  I read a lot of HIV+ people who say they never got rid of the swollen lymph nodes for example. 

 ???

Offline Ann

  • Administrator
  • Member
  • Posts: 28,140
  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: Oral sex risky with irritated throat?
« Reply #21 on: January 31, 2011, 10:11:25 AM »
Person,

ARS normally lasts only a week or so. Many positive people experience generalised swollen lymph nodes but this does not indicate a continuation of ARS. It's just part of the illness. 

If you cannot bring yourself to believe us when we tell you that you have not had a risk for hiv infection, then test at the appropriate time and collect your negative result. It's that simple.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline Person9991

  • Member
  • Posts: 20
Re: Oral sex risky with irritated throat?
« Reply #22 on: February 15, 2011, 05:36:55 PM »
I have tested at the 8th week mark and I feel confident that the negative result I got will remain negative when I test again at the 13th week.

In fact, when I was sitting in front of the nurse, getting my blood sample drawns, I really felt like I was wasting my time.  That testing was useless.

Looking back, I also wasted a tremendous amount of time and energy worrying.  It ruined my once in a lifetime vacations with my girlfriend.

If anyone is going through this, I have one advice: don't have sex with random peope if you are prone to anxiety.  No amount of rational advice will calm you down.

Get tested for your peace of mind and try to find activities that you can handle.

Offline Andy Velez

  • Global Moderator
  • Member
  • Posts: 24,894
Re: Oral sex risky with irritated throat?
« Reply #23 on: February 15, 2011, 06:08:01 PM »
That's good but not surprising news about your negative result. And in your case I agree that any further testing is unnecessary.

Enjoy your result and get on with your life.
Andy Velez

Offline Person9991

  • Member
  • Posts: 20
I recently had a huge HIV scare 4 months ago after unrpotected oral sex.  I tested negative at 9 weeks and I'm due to test again next month.  I'm confident I'll be OK.

Recently, I had anal sex (receptive) with another man.  This time I was extra careful.  I made sure he showered toroughly before sex.  Then I asked him that I be the one who puts the condom on him so that the hand he uses to masturbate doesn't come in contact with its surface.  I made sure to use plenty of lubricant.  I even made sure the man wasn't too well endowed to damage my rectum.   :D I know, that's weird, but I prefer having a piece of mind.

Anyway, I was very careful and after the sex was over and he ejaculated (inside the condom inside me), the condom seemed perfectly intact. 

However, I did forget to check the expiration date of his condom and if his lubricant was water based.  It was clear and looked pretty generic but who knows, right? 

My question is this: will condoms look intact but become porous if you use oil based lubricant or will they simply fail and break? 

Also, I'm getting a routine test next month...4 weeks after this recent exposure.  While I'm aware 3 months is the guideline, can I be confident that combined with my safety measure and a 4 week test that my result will be reliable?

Offline Matty the Damned

  • Member
  • Posts: 12,228
  • Ninja Please
You must keep all your thoughts questions and comments in your original thread. This helps us follow your story and allows us to give you the most accurate advice.

If you cannot find your original thread, please click the red link I have posted above. Alternatively you can use the "Show own posts" link which appears in the uppermost left hand column on any forum page.

Your questions will not be answered unless you return to your original thread

Please take the time to read our Welcome Thread and familiarise yourself with the posting guidelines.

MtD

Offline Andy Velez

  • Global Moderator
  • Member
  • Posts: 24,894
Re: Oral sex risky with irritated throat?
« Reply #26 on: April 07, 2011, 06:48:21 PM »
I've merged your threads together. In the future please follow the rule of the site and keep all of your entries in this same thread.

As to your latest concern, if the condom had failed it would have been very clear what had happened. Condom failure is not about itsy bitsy little holes as people often fear. No, when it happens the result is the whole thing looks like a hoop with fringe on your penis.

So you are worrying needlessly.  And way too cautious. For instance, HIV is not transmitted by hand from someone having his semen or pre-cum on his hand touching a condom. The only confirmed risks for the sexual transmission are unprotected vaginal and anal intercourse. HIV is not transmitted from the surface of a condom or via touch or a doorknob or a barber's razor or any of that stuff.

Use condoms everytime for intercourse and you will be well protected. It's really that simple.
Andy Velez

Offline Person9991

  • Member
  • Posts: 20
Re: Oral sex risky with irritated throat?
« Reply #27 on: April 07, 2011, 06:54:43 PM »
I'm sorry, I didn't mean to break a rule.  I thought I was doing the right thing by starting a new thread instead of reviving an old thread.  I guess I should read the rules a bit more :)

I know I sound overly worried but I read how people get infected in the "Just tested poz" section or others and it's not reassuring.  I just read one guy who got infected with a condom and the other only had some frottage.

I'd like to believe this 1 in 100 chances of getting infected without protection, but it looks more like 1 in a 100 chances of infection with a condom on.

Offline Andy Velez

  • Global Moderator
  • Member
  • Posts: 24,894
Re: Oral sex risky with irritated throat?
« Reply #28 on: April 07, 2011, 07:04:45 PM »
I'm sorry, I didn't mean to break a rule.  I thought I was doing the right thing by starting a new thread instead of reviving an old thread.  I guess I should read the rules a bit more :)

I know I sound overly worried but I read how people get infected in the "Just tested poz" section or others and it's not reassuring.  I just read one guy who got infected with a condom and the other only had some frottage.

I'd like to believe this 1 in 100 chances of getting infected without protection, but it looks more like 1 in a 100 chances of infection with a condom on.

The kind of report you are referring to under careful examination turns out not to be solidly documented. You ought to stop reading all that stuff. It only continues to feed your fears and all to no good purpose. And as for talking about getting infected with a condom on, well frankly that is ridiculous.  Nothing you have reported would lead me to expect anything other than a negative result from your routine test. In fact, nothing you have reported suggests that HIV testing is even necessary. But that's up to you to decide in terms of what you need for your peace of mind.
Andy Velez

Offline Ann

  • Administrator
  • Member
  • Posts: 28,140
  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: Oral sex risky with irritated throat?
« Reply #29 on: April 08, 2011, 10:05:39 AM »
Person,

There have been long-term studies of couples where one is positive and one is negative. In the couples who used condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, but no barrier for oral activities, not one of the negative partners became infected with hiv. Not one. These studies involved hundreds of couples and went on for years. One of the studies went on for ten years.

As Andy has told you, you cannot go by what is referred to as "patient report". Sometimes people forget what they really did while under the influence of drink and/or drugs, and sometimes people are too ashamed or embarrassed to admit to not using condoms. We do not challenge such reports in the other sections of these forums because those forums are for support, not for accusing people of lying. Sometimes people just cannot come to terms with their own part in their infection and that is something they need to take up with a trained therapist - not random people on the internet.

The only reason to make your sexual partner shower before having sex is to make them smell nice. Their showering won't protect you from any STIs.

You did not have a risk and you can fully expect your routine hiv test to return with a negative result.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline Person9991

  • Member
  • Posts: 20
Re: Oral sex risky with irritated throat?
« Reply #30 on: April 08, 2011, 10:07:52 AM »
Andy,

I do not wish to drag this out, but still, when you read posts like these:

http://forums.poz.com/index.php?topic=37263.0
http://forums.poz.com/index.php?topic=36877.0

...it's hard not to worry.  Are these people being honest?  Why wouldn't they be?  I know it's not healthy to feed my fears, but on the other hand, I wonder if the common knowledge about HIV is accurate...espeically in regards to oral sex.  It sounds like any sex is not safe.

Offline Person9991

  • Member
  • Posts: 20
Re: Oral sex risky with irritated throat?
« Reply #31 on: April 08, 2011, 10:16:20 AM »
Ann,

Thank you for your comment.

In regards to the showering, I know it doesn't provide a protection, like a condom.  I just want to make sure that my partner doesn't have old infected fluids on his skin and hands.  And yes, smell nice.

I know that sounds over the top, but even though I am young in good shape, I have an extremely fragile health.  I tend to catch every single cold, flu or infection there is.  Just this winter I had two colds, mono, strep throat and a pneumonia all at once.  I thought I was dying.

I'm afraid if someone has HIV, I'll be the one in million guy who gets it in an unconventional way.

Offline Ann

  • Administrator
  • Member
  • Posts: 28,140
  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: Oral sex risky with irritated throat?
« Reply #32 on: April 08, 2011, 10:21:02 AM »
Person,

I already explained to you about your concerns in reply #30. See my reply in #29. We will not discuss this further with you.

You are not going to be that special guy who gets hiv in some weird and wonderful way. Use condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse and you will avoid hiv infection. IT REALLY IS THAT SIMPLE!!!

If you read the Welcome Thread before posting like you're supposed to, you will have read the following posting guideline:

Quote

Anyone who continues to post excessively, questioning a conclusive negative result or no-risk situation, will be subject to a four week Time Out (a temporary ban from the Forums). If you continue to post excessively after one Time Out, you may be given a second Time Out which will last eight weeks. There is no third Time Out - it is a permanent ban. The purpose of a Time Out is to encourage you to seek the face-to-face help we cannot provide on this forum.


Please consider yourself warned!

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline Person9991

  • Member
  • Posts: 20
Re: Oral sex risky with irritated throat?
« Reply #33 on: April 08, 2011, 10:27:51 AM »
Ann,

I didn't mean to spam.  I was typing my reply to andy (#30) when you posted yours (#29).   I simply answered no to the question that says "Do you want to view the reply before you post?". 

There's no need to warn me.  I'm not purposefully  breaking rules.  It's friday and everything's cool :)

Offline Ann

  • Administrator
  • Member
  • Posts: 28,140
  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: Oral sex risky with irritated throat?
« Reply #34 on: April 08, 2011, 10:32:53 AM »
TGIF! :)
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline Ann

  • Administrator
  • Member
  • Posts: 28,140
  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: Oral sex risky with irritated throat?
« Reply #35 on: April 08, 2011, 10:45:12 AM »
Person,

I deleted the post you made in someone else's thread. If you read the Welcome Thread before posting like you're supposed to, you will have read the following posting guideline:

Quote


Only those Moderators and members who are authorized to answer questions in the Am I Infected? forum are permitted do so. Unauthorized responses may be deleted without permission of the poster. Repeatedly posting replies of this nature may result in a Time Out or permanent ban, at the discretion of the Moderator Team.


Please consider yourself warned! Yes, sorry to have to warn you again, but we have strict rules governing this forum and we ask that you abide by them. Thank you for your cooperation.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline Person9991

  • Member
  • Posts: 20
Re: Oral sex risky with irritated throat?
« Reply #36 on: May 10, 2011, 02:44:44 PM »
Hi, 

Me again. 

I had another sexual encounter one and half week ago.

All I did is masturbate and ejaculate in the man's rectum at his request.  No penetration was involved.

I did touch his penis a bit with the same hand I masturbated with and the tip of my own did graze a bit of his hair when I came up close to 'finish up'.

With that I left and assumed that for once, I didn't take any risks.

But today, both my GF (with who I have unprotected sex with) and I both woke up with fever and CRAZY joint pain.  We couldn't even get out of bed to take care of our baby who had been crying for like 10 minutes and we never let him cry.  We also have diarrhea and nausea.  I haven't eat in a while.

I managed to make it to work but now I'm wondering if that encounter puts me at risk or HIV, or other STD's which could include these symptoms.

Joint pain really comes with the flu yet my throat is fine.  All I have is abdominal cramps and intense migrating joint pain.

Do I have any risk? 

I know this sounds low risk, but I always get symptoms in the window of acute HIV infection so all these coincidences are making me paranoid.

If I have sex with a man, I swear I'll do it in a Bio Suit, at a distance.   :(

Offline RapidRod

  • Member
  • Posts: 15,288
Re: Oral sex risky with irritated throat?
« Reply #37 on: May 10, 2011, 03:08:51 PM »
HIV is transmitted by;
Unprotected penetrative anal or vaginall sex
Sharing works with other IV drug abusers
Mother to child.


Offline Andy Velez

  • Global Moderator
  • Member
  • Posts: 24,894
Re: Oral sex risky with irritated throat?
« Reply #38 on: May 10, 2011, 03:12:55 PM »
I assume by "in his rectum" you mean outside of his anus.

Assuming that I am correct about that then you did not have a risk. Rod has listed the only confirmed risks for the sexual transmission of HIV.

There is nothing HIV-specific about your symptoms. If they persist you should discuss them with your doctor.

Andy Velez

Offline Ann

  • Administrator
  • Member
  • Posts: 28,140
  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: Oral sex risky with irritated throat?
« Reply #39 on: May 10, 2011, 03:18:03 PM »
Person,

I rejected the new account you tried to create. We do not allow more than one account per person here and that is a rule we take very seriously. If you try to create a new account again, you will be permanently banned, no questions asked. Please consider yourself warned.

You did not have a risk for hiv infection.

Use condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, correctly and consistently, and you will avoid hiv infection. It really is that simple!

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline Person9991

  • Member
  • Posts: 20
Risk of oral sex with chapped lips?
« Reply #40 on: October 10, 2011, 05:05:24 AM »
Hi there,

I performed oral on a man two weeks ago and had protected anal  sex with him.

10 days later, I woke up with a sore throat, painful lymph nodes, constant headache and fever.  A  producing cough also accompanied these for  a  couple of days.  I figured it  was just a cold but I haven't  got out of  the house for quite some time and no one around me is sick so where does  it come from?  

I'm confident I didn't get  it anally since I put the condom  on him myself, used proper lube  and that he even didn't  ejaculate  in it (he masturbated  afterwards), I'm confident I was safe

But before  I had sex, I took a bunch of stimulants in  a  party so I kept grindiing my teeth all night and doing  all kinds of stuff  with my lips.  They weren't bleeding or anything, but they  were definitly reddened and a bit  cracked, so  I wonder if this could be a potential point of  entry for HIV.  It lasted a few minutes and he didn't ejaculate  in my mouth either, not even precum.  I don't  know if that changes anything.

At least it didn't  last very long...there was no ejaculation involved  in my mouth, not even precum.

« Last Edit: October 10, 2011, 05:07:56 AM by Person9991 »

Offline Andy Velez

  • Global Moderator
  • Member
  • Posts: 24,894
Re: Risk of oral sex with chapped lips?
« Reply #41 on: October 10, 2011, 08:59:40 AM »
You are worrying needlessly. Your saliva has over a dozen elements and proteins which very effectively prevent the transmission of viable HIV.

The condom would have protected you very effectively even if he had ejaculated in it. Make sure you use one everytime you have anal intercourse. No exceptions.

As for your symptoms, there is absolutely nothing HIV specific about any of them, which is not surprising since you didn't do anything risky. For future reference, should you ever have a genuine risk like unprotected anal, neither the presence nor the absence of symptoms will ever tell you anything accurately about your HIV status. Only an HIV test at 13 weeks can give you a conclusive negative result.

If your symptoms persist you should discuss them with your doctor to find out what the real cause is.

This is not an HIV situation and there is no need for testing.

We do advise anyone who is sexually active that other STDs are much easier to acquire than HIV. So a full STD panel should be done annually to check for everything.
Andy Velez

Offline Person9991

  • Member
  • Posts: 20
Re: Risk of oral sex with chapped lips?
« Reply #42 on: October 12, 2011, 03:15:40 AM »
Thank you,

I'm still gonna get tested for peace of mind though. 

I'd like to  know something though...

Today I went  to the doctor for my bad  throat and tomorrow  I'll get a  bunch of tests, including mono, hepatitis and bunch of other stuff.   I asked her  to throw HIV  in there but she didn't ask  why.

Is 18 days way too  early  for an HIV  test?   I do not know  what  generation of test  they use.

I already had a test scheduled with another clinic  next week.   Should I wait for  that appointment or take both?

Offline RapidRod

  • Member
  • Posts: 15,288
Re: Risk of oral sex with chapped lips?
« Reply #43 on: October 12, 2011, 05:42:52 AM »
■Please do not start a new thread every time you have another question or thought - regardless if you think your questions are related to each other or not. It helps us to help you when you keep all your thoughts or questions in one thread and it helps other readers to follow the discussion. Additional threads will be merged.


■If you cannot find your thread, click on the "Show own posts" link in the left-hand column of any forum page, under your name.


Offline Andy Velez

  • Global Moderator
  • Member
  • Posts: 24,894
Re: Risk of oral sex with chapped lips?
« Reply #44 on: October 12, 2011, 08:00:23 AM »
Whether you accept it or not, you did not have a risk for HIV transmission. So when you get tested is irrelevant since a test is unnecessary.

The average time to seroconversion is 22 days. If you had a genuine risk sexually such as unprotected vaginal or anal intercourse then you can test initially at 6 weeks. A negative result at that point would indicate the likelihood of continuing to test negative for a conclusive result at 13 weeks.

You can decide what you want to do. HIV is not your problem at this point.
Andy Velez

Offline Ann

  • Administrator
  • Member
  • Posts: 28,140
  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: Risk of oral sex with chapped lips?
« Reply #45 on: October 13, 2011, 07:15:26 AM »
Person,

Yet again, I've merged your threads. When are you going to read our Welcome thread and start abiding by our rules? It better be NOW, or you'll find yourself banned from this site.

Re-read your entire thread until what we've told you repeatedly about hiv transmission and the forum rules sinks into your head.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline Person9991

  • Member
  • Posts: 20
Condom breakage
« Reply #46 on: March 19, 2012, 03:17:26 PM »
I had a sex with a prostitute and the condom broke during intercourse.  I noticed it right away and pulled out immediatly.

I'm gonna get tested at the appropriate time, I already have my apointment.  In the mean time, I'd like to know what kind of odds (high or low) there are in that infection might occur, assuming of course that she is positive.

Offline Andy Velez

  • Global Moderator
  • Member
  • Posts: 24,894
Re: Risk of oral sex with chapped lips?
« Reply #47 on: March 19, 2012, 03:33:52 PM »
First of all, I have merged your latest thread with your previous one. As you have been told before, the rule of the site is to keep all entries in one single thread. This is the only thread you should be using.


We always evaluate any incident with the presumption that the other person is HIV positive.

Your risk in this latest incident during which your condom broke was a low level one. Getting tested is a good idea just to confirm your negative status. You were protected until the condom broke. It was a single incident. And HIV is significantly more difficult to transmit from female to male as contrasted with the other way around. Taking all of that into consideration I do expect you to test negative.

Andy Velez

 


Terms of Membership for these forums
 

© 2014 Smart + Strong. All Rights Reserved.   terms of use and your privacy
Smart + Strong® is a registered trademark of CDM Publishing, LLC.