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Author Topic: I should have known better..  (Read 2972 times)

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Offline bosko71

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I should have known better..
« on: January 18, 2011, 05:00:57 PM »
16 Days ago.... I had unprotected anal sex with my estranged wife. I did not know at the time she was having sex with multiple other partners. 15 days ago she developed classic HSV-2 symptoms and subsequently tested positive for HSV-2. I understand that I obviously put myself at risk and now am awaiting results from a full battery of STD tests.  My doctor also ordered either a DNA or RNA HIV test (not sure which one), I didn't even ask for it he just suggested it. I can expect the results on Friday.

As I try to hold back the anxiety I guess my questions are as follows; should I prepare myself for a potential false positive commonly associated with these test? Also the fact that she acquired HSV-2 does that increase the probability that she may contracted HIV?

Thank you.

Offline Matty the Damned

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Re: I should have known better..
« Reply #1 on: January 18, 2011, 05:04:09 PM »
This is a risk situation for HIV infection and you need to be tested. I question the diagnostic usefulness of the HIV PCR tests your doctor has ordered. The PCR-DNA test has a high rate of false positives, so let's hope it's the RNA variety.

In any event you will need to have an antibody test 3 months from the date of this encounter, PCR testing or not.

MtD

Offline bosko71

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Re: I should have known better..
« Reply #2 on: January 18, 2011, 05:19:18 PM »
So it would not be definitive after 6-8 weeks? Is it because, it was a high risk event? Does the fact that she contracted HSV make it a higher risk?

Offline Matty the Damned

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Re: I should have known better..
« Reply #3 on: January 18, 2011, 06:15:55 PM »
The only definitive HIV diagnostic test is the antibody test. Now, the window period for that test is 13 weeks but most people who test antibody positive, do so within 4-6 weeks of exposure. A negative antibody test can only be considered conclusive at 13 weeks, but a negative at 6-8 weeks is an excellent indicator that the 13 week result will be negative as well.

No matter what a PCR test says (positive or negative), you will still have to have an antibody test.

That your ex-wife is now HSV-2 positive really doesn't increase the risk to you in terms of HIV. You may now have HSV infection but then you could have had that for years. It's a very common virus in humans. It causes cold sores. When you get cold sores on your privates we call it genital herpes.

MtD

Offline RapidRod

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Re: I should have known better..
« Reply #4 on: January 18, 2011, 07:53:11 PM »
Let me correct Matty's overview. HSV1 is what causes cold sores.

Offline Matty the Damned

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Re: I should have known better..
« Reply #5 on: January 18, 2011, 08:06:34 PM »
Let me correct Matty's overview. HSV1 is what causes cold sores.

In fact you are incorrect.

Both HSV1 and HSV2 cause both cold sores and genital herpes. The viruses are essentially interchangeable.

Which causes which varies from place to place.

MtD


Offline RapidRod

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Re: I should have known better..
« Reply #6 on: January 18, 2011, 08:12:52 PM »
Both do cause cold sores but the primary cause is HSV1.

Offline Matty the Damned

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Re: I should have known better..
« Reply #7 on: January 18, 2011, 08:19:55 PM »
Both do cause cold sores but the primary cause is HSV1.

Again you are incorrect.

In some areas HSV1 is considered the primary cause of genital herpes and HSV2 of cold sores, in other areas the reverse applies. It varies from place to place.

Both can cause either condition. In the sexual health trade, genital herpes is often referred to as "cold sores of the cunt".

It is often easier to refer to "HSV", rather than drawing a distinction between "HSV1" and "HSV2" for this very reason.

In any event, this discussion of HSV has gone on long enough. It is really irrelevant to the HIV concerns of the OP.

MtD

Offline RapidRod

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Offline Ann

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Re: I should have known better..
« Reply #9 on: January 19, 2011, 07:58:03 AM »
http://www.herpes-coldsores.com/cold_sores.htm#Are_Cold_Sores_really_Herpes

I disagree with the statement in your link that the type of herpes that causes cold sores rarely causes genital herpes. My genital herpes is documented as HSV1.

Ann
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Offline RapidRod

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Re: I should have known better..
« Reply #10 on: January 19, 2011, 08:59:17 AM »
I disagree with the statement in your link that the type of herpes that causes cold sores rarely causes genital herpes. My genital herpes is documented as HSV1.

Ann
It did say rarely.

Offline bosko71

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Oral and frottage
« Reply #11 on: March 28, 2011, 08:39:52 PM »
Ugh, sorry but no matter how many times one reads similar posts, it just doesn't compare to receiving a direct response;

I recently participated in mutual fellecio with another man I met online (received and gave.. although perhaps gave a total of 5 min and no ejaculation) beyond that we did some naked frottage and he ultimately came on the back side of my thighs. There was never any penetration... So the proverbial question; Was there any risk associated with this incident?

Thanks for your time! 

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: I should have known better..
« Reply #12 on: March 28, 2011, 09:03:11 PM »
Bosko, I have merged your threads. In the future please follow our rule and keep all of your entries in this same thread. Thanks.

Now, your latest question. Your saliva has over a dozen elements and proteins which very effectively prevent the transmission of viable HIV. As far as receiving oral which is one of the most common of sexual activities, in the entire history of the epidemic there has never been a single confirmed case of transmission in that manner. You aren't going to make history by becoming the first.

Always make sure condoms are being used for intercourse and you will be well protected against the sexual transmission of HIV. Period.
Andy Velez

Offline bosko71

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Re: I should have known better..
« Reply #13 on: March 28, 2011, 09:09:00 PM »
Thanks Andy, I'm not going to harp on a non-risk incident but just one more question; Would having receding gums or having early periodontal disease increase the risk in giving oral?

Thanks again 

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: I should have known better..
« Reply #14 on: March 29, 2011, 08:23:54 AM »
It would take having EXTREMELY poor oral care to have a greater risk. Visually it would be a pretty gruesome situation. And it would still be essentially theoretical. Claims of transmission via giving oral never seem to hold up under careful scrutiny.

If you are going to worry about the situation you can always get tested at 13 weeks just for your peace of mind. It's a waste of resources and a  negative result is inevitable, but you will have to decide about that for yourself. I don't see this as a risk situation.
Andy Velez

Offline bosko71

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Re: I should have known better..
« Reply #15 on: March 31, 2011, 10:09:12 PM »
Ok... I am trying really hard to keep those ugly anxiety ridden demons at bay! But I keep reading individual's accounts on how they are certain they were infected either by giving a blowjob or rubbing one part on another without penetration and it plays with one's mind. Sorry, I don't really have another question and I didn't want to waste anyone's time with a panic confused question..  But I am trying to reassure myself one more time that the latest incident I described above was a minuscule risk..? Can I use that word?

Gracias.

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: I should have known better..
« Reply #16 on: April 01, 2011, 08:22:30 AM »
No, I wouldn't call it a "miniscule" risk. I would call the risk "theoretical." In the real world of HIV anything other than sex with your own hand is theoretically a risk. But that same real world we know that the only confirmed risks for the sexual transmission of HIV are unprotected vaginal and anal intercourse.

You can do yourself a big favor and stop surfing the net where you will only find fuel for your worst fears and all to no good purpose.

You did not have a real risk. But if you going to continue to bother yourself about this incident, get tested at 13 weeks and collect the inevitable negative result. It's unnecessary to do but some just aren't satisfied until they have that negative result in hand.
Andy Velez

Offline bosko71

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Re: I should have known better..
« Reply #17 on: April 01, 2011, 08:29:49 AM »
Thanks Andy, I think I'm just more frustrated that I thought I was practicing safe sexual practices by only doing certain things. Now however, I'm just confused.

As a bi-sexual male I want to take my sexual health seriously and be knowledgeable in all future risks involved... so for my understanding; it is less risky to give oral sex to a HIV+ male rather than to have a one time unprotected vaginal sex with a female with an unknown status?

Thanks and I hope you understand that I am just looking to make healthier choices.  

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: I should have known better..
« Reply #18 on: April 01, 2011, 08:35:18 AM »
Keep it simple, Bosko. Your mind is working way overtime here unnecessarily.

Yes, I would say giving oral to an HIV+ guy is less of a risk than unprotected vaginal intercourse. The risk of giving oral is strictly theoretical. The risk of unprotected intercourse is real and not just theoretical.

Andy Velez

 


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