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Author Topic: Gay 25m, terrified to get tested  (Read 2572 times)

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Offline terrified25

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Gay 25m, terrified to get tested
« on: December 15, 2010, 04:29:29 PM »
I will start by saying I'm a 25yo gay male. I have not had an HIV test in years. I have had unprotected sex before. I found out after the fact that one of my partners tested HIV positive a week after we had sex, and I have found out two other guys I had sex with became HIV positive, but it was a long time after I had slept with them.

Basically I am really terrified to get tested because I'm worried I will test positive. I have never had the ARS symptoms, and I very rarely get sick. A week ago, I started experiencing anxiety over this. Today I was looking at my body in the mirror and I noticed a few brownish blotchy spots on my lower torso. They are brownish and flat. To be honest I'm not sure if they are birthmarks or if they have been there before, but after looking and noticing them I'm freaking out that it could be Kaposi's Sarcoma. I attached a picture of them, I'm not sure if that's what KS spots look like. I'm freaking out.

Anyway I have just been reading everything I can find since I've been so worried. I don't know if I am ready yet to cope with getting tested or the possibility of a positive result. I'm incredibly scared since I know that I have been exposed in the past. I guess I'm not really sure why I'm posting other than to try and talk through it. Do you guys think there's still a chance I could be negative? Or is my situation pretty much hopeless :(

I guess any input would be appreciated. I've been worrying like crazy.

« Last Edit: December 15, 2010, 05:17:13 PM by Ann »

Offline Matty the Damned

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Re: Gay 25m, terrified to get tested
« Reply #1 on: December 15, 2010, 04:43:14 PM »
Those lesions are not Kaposi's Sarcoma.

If you have had unprotected and or vaginal sex you should get tested for HIV (and other STDs) 13 weeks from the date of the most recent sexual ecounter. Note I'm saying "should" not "must". It's up to you.

If you decide not to be tested then that is your lookout but we will not be able to help you any further. HIV is a very serious condition but for many people it is quite manageable these days. The consequences of having undiagnosed HIV infection are, on the other hand, fatal.

MtD

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: Gay 25m, terrified to get tested
« Reply #2 on: December 15, 2010, 04:51:14 PM »
You need to stop self-diagnosing yourself. Doing that is bad for your health.

And no, the spots you are concerned about do not even remotely resemble KS.

You do need to get tested. You should do it at 13 weeks past the most recent unprotected incident. We're not in the guessing business here. Only an HIV test taken at the right time can give you the answer you want.

And it's time for you to stop risking your life by having unprotected intercourse. You can have anal intercourse with anyone you like and regardless of whether they are HIV+ or not. But you need to do it the safer way which means the insertive partner must always be wearing a condom. No exceptions no matter what you think you know about his history or how great he looks or any other irrelevant factors. A condom everytime is what you need to imprint on your mind.

So cut the drama and the "freaking out" stuff and behave like a grownup. If you're old enough to be having sex you are also old enough to be taking responsibility for protecting your health. Get tested and find out where you're at.

Everyone worries when they are going to get tested. It's just the way it is. That's not a reason to not get tested and instead just live in a state of anxiety about the issue. Keep us posted on your test result and good luck.

« Last Edit: December 15, 2010, 04:53:50 PM by Andy Velez »
Andy Velez

Offline terrified25

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Re: Gay 25m, terrified to get tested
« Reply #3 on: December 15, 2010, 04:53:51 PM »
Ok thank you both. I am going to get tested as soon as I can get the courage. I was just absolutely going crazy at the thought that those 4 spots could be a sign of KS. If I am negative I promised myself I would never have unprotected sex again unless I'm in a long term relationship and both tested together.

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: Gay 25m, terrified to get tested
« Reply #4 on: December 15, 2010, 04:55:15 PM »
Don't wait for "the courage." Go in with your knees quaking if you have to.
Andy Velez

Offline terrified25

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Re: Gay 25m, terrified to get tested
« Reply #5 on: December 15, 2010, 05:13:55 PM »
Don't wait for "the courage." Go in with your knees quaking if you have to.

Ok. Do you think there is any chance that I am negative, or would my encounters pretty much guarantee that I would be HIV+ at this point?

Offline Matty the Damned

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Re: Gay 25m, terrified to get tested
« Reply #6 on: December 15, 2010, 05:19:54 PM »
Ok. Do you think there is any chance that I am negative, or would my encounters pretty much guarantee that I would be HIV+ at this point?

Speculating about such things is not helpful. The only way you can know your HIV status is to be tested at the appropriate time.

MtD

Offline Ann

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  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: Gay 25m, terrified to get tested
« Reply #7 on: December 15, 2010, 05:21:16 PM »
terrified,

I removed the photo from your post - I don't want anyone to have the mistaken impression that we can diagnose anything by looking at it on the internet. While we can't tell you what those spots are, we CAN tell you that they look nothing like KS.

Sure, there's a chance that you're still negative, but the ONLY way to find out is to test.

If by chance you are positive, not taking the test to find out won't make one bit of difference to the virus. It will be happily trundling along, damaging your immune system until you go from feeling OK one day to being in the hospital with PCP or worse and fighting for your life the next.

It's up to you mate. You could be worrying for no good reason, but again, the only way to find out where you stand in relation to hiv is to test.

In the meantime while you're waiting to grow a set, I hope you start using condoms. If you are still negative you want to stay that way and if you're poz, you need to keep your virus to yourself and not infect others.

Wise up man!

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline Ann

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  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: Gay 25m, terrified to get tested
« Reply #8 on: December 20, 2010, 09:35:02 AM »
EVERYONE:

We are having a problem with this thread in that unauthorised members keep posting in it. I have so far deleted three such posts. One member, who goes by the name of "thezak", has been given a ban as he has posted TWICE in this thread and no where else on this forum.

So please understand that anyone who refuses to abide by the posting rules set out in this forum's Welcome Thread risks being banned.

YOU HAVE ALL BEEN WARNED!!!

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline terrified25

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  • Posts: 4
Re: Gay 25m, terrified to get tested
« Reply #9 on: January 10, 2011, 03:20:23 PM »
oh my god, i just came back from getting tested and the result was negative. I can't even believe it. I'm still in shock, although in a good way. Thank you all for your advice and support.

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: Gay 25m, terrified to get tested
« Reply #10 on: January 10, 2011, 03:44:49 PM »
You're welcome. Now just be sure to always  use condoms for vaginal/anal intercourse and you won't have anything worry about in relation to the sexual transmission of HIV. It really is that simple as Ann says.
Andy Velez

Offline AD731

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Re: Gay 25m, terrified to get tested
« Reply #11 on: January 10, 2011, 04:34:54 PM »
Please get tested.   Understandably sitting around worrying about it is NOT going to conjure up the answers.

Get tested and hopefully you'll be negative . . .

Then from there, please intelligently the choices you make.

AD

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: Gay 25m, terrified to get tested
« Reply #12 on: January 10, 2011, 05:20:21 PM »
AD, it is a rule of this site that only those who are authorized to do so are allowed to respond to members in this forum. Although I am sure your intention is a good one, please follow our rule in the future.

Thanks for your cooperation.
Andy Velez

 


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