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Author Topic: I don't know what to think  (Read 3056 times)

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Offline WhydidIdoIt

  • Member
  • Posts: 11
I don't know what to think
« on: November 17, 2010, 09:56:43 PM »
Ok so here is what happened to me and a little about myself. I am straight black male. I went to Vegas with a couple of my boys for 4th of July weekend a few months back and made a very stupid decision. I called this number on the back of a card I was given and had a female CSW sent to my hotel room at about 2 am in the early morning hour of July 5th. Here's exactly what happened. We talked a little about what I wanted then what she wanted and then got down to business. I layed back on bed and she performed unprotected oral sex on me for about 2 minutes. She then stopped and told me to put on condom so we can have sex. I placed condom on and had sex with her for no more than 7 minutes. I ejaculated, pulled out and checked condom, (it had semen in it and wasn't broken) and then went to bathroom and took it off and flushed it. She then left. As I was laying in bed around 7 am it suddenly hit me that what if I caught HIV from getting the blowjob. So I returned home all paranoid and freaking out a few days later. So I am looking in mirror on July 10th and examining my neck when I see something that really shocks me. It's a somewhat large knot in my right neck just below the angle of my jaw. SO I go to ER and doctor says its an enlarged lymph node. So I immediately freak out as this is one of the symptoms of primary infection I think. So the doctor asks me to look at my throat and she says it looks perfectly normal and asks me if I have a sore throat. I tell her my throat feels perfect. So doc says she has no idea why the lymph node swelled like that.  Swollen lymph node popped up on July 10th and today is November 17 and I can stand about 5 feet away from mirror and turn my head and still see it slightly stickin out of my neck although it has gotten much smaller. It is now hard as a rock though and won't move. It also feels like I have 2 swollen lymph nodes in the front lower part of my neck but I haven't had them examined. Okay here are my tests:
08/23/2010 - HIV 1/0/2 ABS/Negative
09/28/2010 - HIV 1/2 EIA AB SCREEN/Negative
10/26/2010 - HIV 1/0/2 ABS/Negative
11/6/2010   - Clearview HIV 1/2 SINGLE ASSAY (Rapid Test)/Negative
I've been reading on here and many other sites about saliva not being infectious but "containing" HIV in it and it really freaks me out. Because that basically means that if the sex worker was positive that her saliva entered my body through my urethra. Oh and my other tests that I took on 11/6 : Gonorrhea- Negative; Chlamydia- Negative; Syphilis- Negative. 5 weeks after encounter I awaken to night sweating. Next night same thing but when the night sweating wakes me up at 3 am sore throat develops immediately. No more night sweating but sore throat lasts 7 days. Then it Sept I develop white tongue. I take my credit card and scrape it off and rub it off on my finger and it's some type of white gunk. Brush my tongue and it will go away but just come back. Back of tongue has white material on it as I am typing this message. So now my questions.
1. Do the symptoms mean I am not done seroconverting?
2. Is it true that some people on here tested negative at 4 months then positive at 6?
3. What are my chances that I am truly negative?
Sorry for the long post but I have been reading on this site and I see that a lot of people don't go into detail and don't say EXACTLY what they did so I just wanted to make my exposure more detailed. Any comments would be helpful to me. Thanks

Offline anniebc

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Re: I don't know what to think
« Reply #1 on: November 17, 2010, 10:13:38 PM »
First of all I need to tell you to read the Lessons here on how HIV is and is not transmitted.

I can also tell you that in the entire history of this epidemic there has never been one confirmed HIV diagnosis through getting a BJ, and as we tell the many that have come here before you with the same story, you are not going to be the first.

Only a small group of people seroconvert after the 13 week window period, this group includes those who are receiving immuno-suppressive therapy after transplant procedures, cancer patients who are receiving chemotherapy and long term injecting drug users.

Jan
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
Never knock on deaths door..ring the bell and run..he really hates that.

Offline WhydidIdoIt

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Re: I don't know what to think
« Reply #2 on: November 17, 2010, 10:20:19 PM »
Jan, thank you for your kind words. I went home after this happened and talked to my Uncle about it and told him exactly what happened. He stood up and grabbed me and slammed me against the wall and said "How could you be so stupid, you can catch it from those b****** sucking your d***." My heart sunk as I am uneducated in the field of HIV. I know condom didn't break as I would have really freaked out if something like that happened. I always check my condoms when done having sex. I have even had women to get mad when they saw me checking condom.

Offline anniebc

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Re: I don't know what to think
« Reply #3 on: November 17, 2010, 10:35:47 PM »
What you have to remember is sex worker's are pretty good at looking after their health, after all this is their living, they will take all the precautions they need to, to keep themselves safe, because they are probably thinking the same things you are, and most of them are well educated in the STD transmissions.

Another thing you need to remember is saliver is not infectious, it does carry a minute amount of HIV but not near enough to infect...it contains over a dozen different proteins and enzymes that damage hiv thus rendering it unable to infect...your uncle is wrong,

This is why kissing is also a NO RISK activity.

Jan
« Last Edit: November 17, 2010, 10:37:21 PM by anniebc »
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
Never knock on deaths door..ring the bell and run..he really hates that.

Offline WhydidIdoIt

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Re: I don't know what to think
« Reply #4 on: November 18, 2010, 08:47:02 AM »
Yes I understand that saliva is not infectious. Also I did all my tests at different locations just to make sure I wasn't getting a false negative in case of lab error. I remember the CSW asking me was I clean before she put my penis in her mouth. Maybe that should make me feel better that she was concerned about my cleanliness but in reality it only made me realize that she sucks all he customers' penis without condoms. Now that scares me. I would be really shocked if I test positive after a 2 minute blowjob. I didn't notice any blood what so ever so it should be safe right?

Offline Ann

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Re: I don't know what to think
« Reply #5 on: November 18, 2010, 08:54:28 AM »
Why,

It's insulting to use the term "clean" when describing the state of a person's sexual health. I'm hiv positive and I'm clean, thank you very much. Please don't use that terminology here.

As Jan has told you, getting a blowjob is absolutely NOT a risk for hiv infection. It's no surprise you tested hiv negative - you didn't have a risk.

As for the whole "blood in the mouth" idea, forget about it. Unless you're in the habit of repeatedly punching a person in the mouth before they blow you, there could not possibly be enough blood present to worry about.

You say that you are uneducated when it comes to hiv - and so is your uncle. Who are you going to believe - hiv positive persons who have learned how to keep our loved ones safe or your uncle? I was in a relationship with a negative man for over eight years and he is hiv negative to this day. And yes, we engaged in oral. The ONLY thing you need to do is to keep using condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse and you'll stay negative too.

You need to be using condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, every time, no exceptions until such time as you are in a securely monogamous relationship where you have both tested for ALL sexually transmitted infections together.

To agree to have unprotected intercourse is to consent to the possibility of being infected with an STI. Sex without a condom lasts only a matter of minutes, but hiv is forever.

Have a look through the condom and lube links in my signature line so you can use condoms with confidence.

ALTHOUGH YOU DO NOT NEED FURTHER TESTING AT THIS TIME, anyone who is sexually active should be having a full sexual health care check-up, including but not limited to hiv testing, at least once a year and more often if unprotected intercourse occurs.

If you aren't already having regular, routine check-ups, now is the time to start. As long as you make sure condoms are being used for intercourse, you can fully expect your routine hiv tests to return with negative results.

Don't forget to always get checked for all the other sexually transmitted infections as well, because they are MUCH easier to transmit than hiv.

Use condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, correctly and consistently, and you will avoid hiv infection. It really is that simple!

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline WhydidIdoIt

  • Member
  • Posts: 11
Re: I don't know what to think
« Reply #6 on: November 18, 2010, 10:05:49 AM »
I am deeply sorry Ann. I was only repeating the word/question that the CSW asked me. By her asking me that question I felt as if she was asking if I had any std's. Once again I am sorry and I won't use that word again. I need your advice on something. I have tested negative at 17 weeks but I still am not feeling myself. Do you recommend that I do the PCR test? Because some people say a person might not show positive until six month mark. I have been healthy my whole life with no known health issues. Never done drugs.

Offline Ann

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Re: I don't know what to think
« Reply #7 on: November 18, 2010, 10:20:30 AM »
Why,

Despite out-dated information you may get off the internet or even from health care professional who should know better, the window period for hiv testing has been three months for YEARS now. You are conclusively hiv negative.

Not only are you conclusively hiv negative, but but you never even had a risk in the first place. How could you have hiv when you did not engage in any risk activities?

You certainly do not need PCR testing. You also do not need further antibody testing over this NO RISK incident. You do NOT have hiv!

If you feel unwell, see a doctor. Whatever is going on has nothing to do with hiv - but that doesn't mean it can't be something else. You have ruled hiv out of the picture so you need to find out what, if anything, is actually going on.

You did not have a risk for hiv infection and you are conclusively hiv negative. It's time to get on with your life.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline WhydidIdoIt

  • Member
  • Posts: 11
Re: I don't know what to think
« Reply #8 on: November 18, 2010, 10:48:28 AM »
Ok. Thank you for your time and advice. I think this is a very wonderful website. Call me crazy but I still feel like I am positive although my tests out to 4 months have been negative. I will try to get to the bottom of what's going on with me. Doc did a white blood cell count on me also called WBC differential I think. WBC count was 4.8. Now that freaked me out because that's kind of borderline low/normal right? He said all other values of the differential were normal.

Offline Ann

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  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: I don't know what to think
« Reply #9 on: November 18, 2010, 11:14:17 AM »
Why,

You can never, ever tell a person's hiv status going by their WBC or CBC. The ONLY way to know your status is by antibody testing.

YOU TESTED ANTIBODY NEGATIVE.  You do not have hiv. If you cannot accept your negative hiv status, perhaps it's time to find a therapist who can help you understand why you need to feel punished for having sex.


Quote

Anyone who continues to post excessively, questioning a conclusive negative result or no-risk situation, will be subject to a four week Time Out (a temporary ban from the Forums). If you continue to post excessively after one Time Out, you may be given a second Time Out which will last eight weeks. There is no third Time Out - it is a permanent ban. The purpose of a Time Out is to encourage you to seek the face-to-face help we cannot provide on this forum.


Please consider yourself warned!

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline WhydidIdoIt

  • Member
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Re: I don't know what to think
« Reply #10 on: November 18, 2010, 11:20:53 AM »
Thank you very much Ann.

Offline WhydidIdoIt

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HIV Testing Counselor
« Reply #11 on: November 22, 2010, 07:38:19 PM »
WoW, So I decided to call this place and take the next step in testing which I should have done in the beginning. And a counselor answers the phone and tells me a little about testing and reasons why people should test. He then asks me if I have had unprotected sex within the last 90 days. I tell him I haven't but I did receive unprotected oral on July 4th. He then tells me that the tests are 99.9% accurate after three months (which everybody on here has told me) and that I don't need to retest. Ok so I start to feel a little better. I then tell him that I want to take PCR test but he strongly recommends that I not take the test because I am outside window period. But I insisted because I am still feeling this illness which I've never felt in my entire life and I have 3 swollen lymph nodes in my neck. So I then proceed to tell him how CDC states that saliva is not infectious and he abruptly cuts me off and says "I'm sorry Sir but you CAN catch HIV from oral sex and you really shouldn't believe everything you read on the internet. WOW

Offline debsd222

  • Member
  • Posts: 69
Re: I don't know what to think
« Reply #12 on: November 22, 2010, 08:12:46 PM »
You know, the worrying and the stress you've got yourself under may have something to do with how you're feeling. I am very suggestible when I think something is wrong and swear I have symptoms of this or that. Seems pretty clear you're negative. Be happy.
April 08 3 month bout w/ shingles, ongoing nerve pain
Dec 08 pos  cd4 200 %8  VL 18,000
Feb 09 started sustiva, truvada -allergic to sustiva, hospital 4 days.
March 09 started truvada, reyataz and norvir
March 09  cd4 279  % 12 VL 10,000
April 09 cd4 327  %12  VL 300
Aug 09 cd4 392  %16  Vl undetectable
Dec 09 hospital pneumonia 6 days
Dec 09 cd4 462  %20  VL undetectable
Mar 10 cd4 629 27% VL undetectable
July 9, 2010 cd4 505  21% VL undetectable
Oct 2010 cd4 689  22%  VL 64
Nov 2010  cd4689  22%  VL  UD
May 2013 cd4 759. 29%. VL. UD

Offline WhydidIdoIt

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  • Posts: 11
Re: I don't know what to think
« Reply #13 on: November 22, 2010, 08:24:59 PM »
You know, the worrying and the stress you've got yourself under may have something to do with how you're feeling. I am very suggestible when I think something is wrong and swear I have symptoms of this or that. Seems pretty clear you're negative. Be happy.

Yea I know. Thats what my mom keeps saying too. But no matter what I do I just can't shake this "sick" feeling. I try going to the gym and working out. I just gave up alcohol because it just drives me crazy with thoughts when I get intoxicated now. Lot's of women always call me wanting to hang out and have sex but I can't do that either because I'm scared of intimate contact now. I'm just gonna take Elisa and PCR on December 6th and get it over with. That will be 5 month mark. Thanks for your comment/support!

Offline RapidRod

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Re: I don't know what to think
« Reply #14 on: November 22, 2010, 08:44:19 PM »
You know, the worrying and the stress you've got yourself under may have something to do with how you're feeling. I am very suggestible when I think something is wrong and swear I have symptoms of this or that. Seems pretty clear you're negative. Be happy.

 Only those Moderators and members who are authorized to answer questions in the Am I Infected? forum are permitted do so. Unauthorized responses may be deleted without permission of the poster. Repeatedly posting replies of this nature may result in a Time Out or permanent ban, at the discretion of the Moderator Team.

Offline Ann

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    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: I don't know what to think
« Reply #15 on: November 23, 2010, 08:22:33 AM »
Why,

I'm sorry you had the misfortune of speaking to someone who didn't know what they were talking about when it comes to getting a blowjob. What he told you is absolutely UNTRUE.

If you insist on having an expensive and totally unnecessary PCR test, just make sure it is an RNA PCR and not a DNA PCR. Only the RNA test is approved for diagnostic purposes and then only when there has been a clear risk such as being the receptive partner of unprotected anal or vaginal intercourse where the insertive partner is known to be hiv positive. The DNA tests have a high rate of false positive results and this is why it is not approved for diagnostics.

You don't even need another antibody test. You have already tested reliably hiv negative over a NO RISK blowjob.

I'm giving you that time out you have been warned about. Do not attempt to create a new account to get around your time out because if you do, you will be permanently banned.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline WhydidIdoIt

  • Member
  • Posts: 11
Re: I don't know what to think
« Reply #16 on: February 02, 2011, 09:05:37 PM »
Well, here I am again.... I was going to wait until Jan 6th to test again at the 6 month mark instead of testing on Dec 6th at the 5 month mark but I just couldn't help myself. So I took the test on Dec 7th which was 5 month past my exposure and it was once again negative. But I am still feeling very ill. I asked the Nurse Practitioner if she could look at my tongue and she agreed to. I then said I had something to show her. I pulled out a credit card from my wallet and scraped the back of my tongue with it and off came this creamy white stuff. My tongue didn't bleed after scraping it. She said that was very strange given my negative test result. Ok so on to the swollen lymph nodes I mentioned in my earlier posts..... One swolllen lymph node verified by the nurse along with 2 swollen lymph nodes in the front lower portion of my neck. So the nurse said she didn't have any idea whats causing the lymph node swelling and that she couldn't run any other tests or than std's because my insurance wouldn't cover it ( I am in military and I'm only covered if seen by military doctors) because I was being seen off base. She asked how long they had been swollen and I told her since July 10th which was 6 days after my exposure. Ok Dec 14 I developed sudden fever of 104.4, coughing up brown and yellow sputum, and woke up drenched. Doc gave me tylenol. Fever went away next day and no more night sweating. I thought ARS occured 2-4 weeks after exposure...... But it's been 5 months... I don't know what to think. Just want some more advice from some experienced individuals such as yourselves. I mean I am trying to think positive and figure out what other than HIV could be causing these symptoms. I mean I have tested negative out to 5 months. I haven't worked up the courage to get tested again as it is now Feb and I know the results would surely be definitive now! Can someone help me?

Offline Matty the Damned

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Re: I don't know what to think
« Reply #17 on: February 02, 2011, 09:24:37 PM »
Well, here I am again.... I was going to wait until Jan 6th to test again at the 6 month mark instead of testing on Dec 6th at the 5 month mark but I just couldn't help myself. So I took the test on Dec 7th which was 5 month past my exposure and it was once again negative. But I am still feeling very ill. I asked the Nurse Practitioner if she could look at my tongue and she agreed to. I then said I had something to show her. I pulled out a credit card from my wallet and scraped the back of my tongue with it and off came this creamy white stuff. My tongue didn't bleed after scraping it. She said that was very strange given my negative test result. Ok so on to the swollen lymph nodes I mentioned in my earlier posts..... One swolllen lymph node verified by the nurse along with 2 swollen lymph nodes in the front lower portion of my neck. So the nurse said she didn't have any idea whats causing the lymph node swelling and that she couldn't run any other tests or than std's because my insurance wouldn't cover it ( I am in military and I'm only covered if seen by military doctors) because I was being seen off base. She asked how long they had been swollen and I told her since July 10th which was 6 days after my exposure. Ok Dec 14 I developed sudden fever of 104.4, coughing up brown and yellow sputum, and woke up drenched. Doc gave me tylenol. Fever went away next day and no more night sweating. I thought ARS occured 2-4 weeks after exposure...... But it's been 5 months... I don't know what to think. Just want some more advice from some experienced individuals such as yourselves. I mean I am trying to think positive and figure out what other than HIV could be causing these symptoms. I mean I have tested negative out to 5 months. I haven't worked up the courage to get tested again as it is now Feb and I know the results would surely be definitive now! Can someone help me?

You just don't get it, do you?

YOU WERE NOT AT RISK. YOU DO NOT HAVE HIV. YOU DO NOT NEED TO BE TESTED.

Please stop telling us about your revolting tongue. It has nothing to do with HIV.

Be aware that your next time out will be for 56 days. After that you'll be shitcanned for eternity.

MtD

Offline WhydidIdoIt

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Re: I don't know what to think
« Reply #18 on: February 02, 2011, 09:28:17 PM »
You just don't get it, do you?

YOU WERE NOT AT RISK. YOU DO NOT HAVE HIV. YOU DO NOT NEED TO BE TESTED.

Please stop telling us about your revolting tongue. It has nothing to do with HIV.

Be aware that your next time out will be for 56 days. After that you'll be shitcanned for eternity.

MtD

Thank you very much for your comment Matty...SMH...... I come here for advice and this is what I get

Offline Matty the Damned

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Re: I don't know what to think
« Reply #19 on: February 02, 2011, 09:31:06 PM »
Thank you very much for your comment Matty...SMH...... I come here for advice and this is what I get

Cut the attitude, buster. You come here to fuel your fears. You pay no attention to the advice we give you because it's not what you want to hear.

We cannot help you and I fail to see why we should waste any further time on you.

It's about time you read our Welcome Thread and familiarise yourself with the posting guidelines.

MtD

Offline WhydidIdoIt

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Re: I don't know what to think
« Reply #20 on: February 02, 2011, 10:40:25 PM »
Cut the attitude, buster. You come here to fuel your fears. You pay no attention to the advice we give you because it's not what you want to hear.

We cannot help you and I fail to see why we should waste any further time on you.

It's about time you read our Welcome Thread and familiarise yourself with the posting guidelines.

MtD
Matty, you call my tongue "revolting" then you tell me I'm gonna get "shitcanned for eternity" and you're saying I have an attitude? COme on man grow up. But thank you once again for your comment.

Offline jkinatl2

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Re: I don't know what to think
« Reply #21 on: February 02, 2011, 11:34:31 PM »
You were not at risk. Your latest posts have been reported. Your answers like beyond the scope of this forum.
"Many people, especially in the gay community, turn to oral sex as a safer alternative in the age of AIDS. And with HIV rates rising, people need to remember that oral sex is safer sex. It's a reasonable alternative."

-Kimberly Page-Shafer, PhD, MPH

Welcome Thread

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: I don't know what to think
« Reply #22 on: February 03, 2011, 08:28:49 AM »
If you continue to return here when you did not have a risk and are HIV negative, you are going to find yourself getting a Time Out from the site and risk being permanently banned. Consider yourself warned.

You can take all the tests you like for as long as you like. Doing that is totally a waste of resources.

HIV is not your problem. If you have symptoms that are troubling you, discuss them with your doctor(s). They have absolutely nothing to do with HIV. Period.

Andy Velez

 


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