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Author Topic: URGENT ingrown hair!  (Read 9322 times)

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Offline Miss Philicia

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URGENT ingrown hair!
« on: October 14, 2010, 04:13:18 PM »
Fellow travelers,

I regret to inform you that I have the most vile, painful, incredibly large boil on the left side of my lower penile shaft due to the regrettable habit I have from time to time of over indulging in manscaping.  I wouldn't be posting about this, but it's really bad, so bad in fact that I've not been able to masturbate now for three days.  Any advice would be greatly appreciated.

Best regards,

Miss P
"Iíve slept with enough men to know that Iím not gay"

Offline Matty the Damned

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Re: URGENT ingrown hair!
« Reply #1 on: October 14, 2010, 04:16:39 PM »
Get your cute neighbour over to suck the venom out.

Stat!

MtD

Offline Realist

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Re: URGENT ingrown hair!
« Reply #2 on: October 14, 2010, 04:17:50 PM »
Define: incredibly large boil. Give us a reference size
23/02/10 Tests confirmed
25/02/10 13100 220 24%
12/03/10 19800 372 19%
26/03/10 Atripla
30/04/10 58 286 23%
28/05/10 45 222 21%
25/06/10 UD 301 23%
24/09/10 UD 283 22%
01/12/10 UD 319 23%
11/03/11 UD 293 28%
10/06/11 UD 423 24%
23/08/11 UD 389 26%
28/02/11 UD 315 34%

I blogged it all http://notdownnotout.blogspot.com

Offline Miss Philicia

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Re: URGENT ingrown hair!
« Reply #3 on: October 14, 2010, 04:21:36 PM »
Oh, it's the width of a pencil I suppose -- not too big, but just really painful and seems to be growing by the hour.  If I become erect while looking at enticing imagery on teh intratubz it becomes more painful, so I've resorted to watching Ann Coulter videos.
"Iíve slept with enough men to know that Iím not gay"

Offline Joe K

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Re: URGENT ingrown hair!
« Reply #4 on: October 14, 2010, 04:23:27 PM »
Oh, it's the width of a pencil I suppose -- not too big, but just really painful and seems to be growing by the hour.  If I become erect while looking at enticing imagery on teh intratubz it becomes more painful, so I've resorted to watching Ann Coulter videos.

Sorry Miss P., if you are reduced to watching Ann Coulter, you might as well just end it all.

Have you tried a numbing cream? Oragel works great on body parts.
« Last Edit: October 14, 2010, 04:26:08 PM by killfoile »

Offline Miss Philicia

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Re: URGENT ingrown hair!
« Reply #5 on: October 14, 2010, 04:25:27 PM »

Have you tried a numbing cream?

Would Anal-ease Relax spray work?
"Iíve slept with enough men to know that Iím not gay"

Offline Ann

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Re: URGENT ingrown hair!
« Reply #6 on: October 14, 2010, 04:25:43 PM »
AMPUTATE!!!
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline Matty the Damned

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Re: URGENT ingrown hair!
« Reply #7 on: October 14, 2010, 04:25:55 PM »
PICTARS OR IT DIDN'T HAPPEN OMGLOLWUTHEUGXBOX!

Seriously Miss P, give us some footage of your infected pensu. Otherwise Matty the Damned might have to fill in the blanks.

And none of us want that. :)

MtD

Offline Miss Philicia

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Re: URGENT ingrown hair!
« Reply #8 on: October 14, 2010, 04:27:27 PM »
I'm not photographing my penile MRSA no way no how.
"Iíve slept with enough men to know that Iím not gay"

Offline Joe K

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Re: URGENT ingrown hair!
« Reply #9 on: October 14, 2010, 04:27:40 PM »
AMPUTATE!!!

Sorry Luv, but only a woman would ever suggest this remedy.

Offline Matty the Damned

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Re: URGENT ingrown hair!
« Reply #10 on: October 14, 2010, 04:28:23 PM »
I'm not photographing my penile MRSA no way no how.

Weaksauce. Ur a wimp.

MtD

Offline Realist

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Re: URGENT ingrown hair!
« Reply #11 on: October 14, 2010, 04:29:24 PM »
Ok, here goes - I get these fuckers in all sorts of places, but never had one on my dick.

If it's that big, I would suggest (in my amateur opinion) the following:

- Place a hot towel or cloth on it (as hot as you can stand for a few minutes)
- Pinch the skin lightly either side as close to it as you can to lift the skin off you shaft (skin only - not your meat)
- Get some CLEAN tweezers and slip them either side of it where your fingers are
- Apply significant pressure (your eyes will water) - POP

You will need to breathe at this point.

If the hair doesn't come out with the pop, gently take it out with the tweezers.

Remember to clean up thoroughly to prevent further infection and do not use anything alcohol based which will only irritate the skin.

Or stick with Ann Coulter.
23/02/10 Tests confirmed
25/02/10 13100 220 24%
12/03/10 19800 372 19%
26/03/10 Atripla
30/04/10 58 286 23%
28/05/10 45 222 21%
25/06/10 UD 301 23%
24/09/10 UD 283 22%
01/12/10 UD 319 23%
11/03/11 UD 293 28%
10/06/11 UD 423 24%
23/08/11 UD 389 26%
28/02/11 UD 315 34%

I blogged it all http://notdownnotout.blogspot.com

Offline Joe K

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Re: URGENT ingrown hair!
« Reply #12 on: October 14, 2010, 04:30:45 PM »
Weaksauce. Ur a wimp.

MtD

Now you have that blank space, so fill away!

Offline Miss Philicia

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Re: URGENT ingrown hair!
« Reply #13 on: October 14, 2010, 04:31:37 PM »
ugh, that sounds horribly scary Realist
"Iíve slept with enough men to know that Iím not gay"

Offline Matty the Damned

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Re: URGENT ingrown hair!
« Reply #14 on: October 14, 2010, 04:31:59 PM »
Ok, here goes - I get these fuckers in all sorts of places, but never had one on my dick.

If it's that big, I would suggest (in my amatuer opinion) the following:

- Place a hot towel or cloth on it (as hot as you can stand for a few minutes)
- Pinch the skin lightly either side as close to it as you can to lift the skin off you shaft (skin only - not your meat)
- Get some CLEAN tweezers and slip them either side of it where your fingers are
- Apply significant pressure (your eyes will water) - POP

You will need to breathe at this point.

If the hair doesn't come out with the pop, gently take it out with the tweezers.

Remeber to clean up throughly to prevent further infection and do not use anything alcohol based which will only irritate the skin.

Or stick with Ann Coulter.

^^ Don't listen to this crap. Dip your wang in 85 proof rum. Post pictars.


Now you have that blank space, so fill away!

Don't tempt me Joseph. It might provoke the Rapture.

MtD

Offline GSOgymrat

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Re: URGENT ingrown hair!
« Reply #15 on: October 14, 2010, 04:34:56 PM »
Boils huh?

I suggest you determine which deity you have blasphemed and start doing penance. A little self-flagellation may be in order... or maybe an animal sacrifice... Based on the location and size of the boil I'd start with a bird and work my way up.

Offline Realist

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Re: URGENT ingrown hair!
« Reply #16 on: October 14, 2010, 04:35:32 PM »
ugh, that sounds horribly scary Realist

Satisfying though.
23/02/10 Tests confirmed
25/02/10 13100 220 24%
12/03/10 19800 372 19%
26/03/10 Atripla
30/04/10 58 286 23%
28/05/10 45 222 21%
25/06/10 UD 301 23%
24/09/10 UD 283 22%
01/12/10 UD 319 23%
11/03/11 UD 293 28%
10/06/11 UD 423 24%
23/08/11 UD 389 26%
28/02/11 UD 315 34%

I blogged it all http://notdownnotout.blogspot.com

Offline Joe K

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Re: URGENT ingrown hair!
« Reply #17 on: October 14, 2010, 04:38:52 PM »
Boils huh?

I suggest you determine which deity you have blasphemed and start doing penance. A little self-flagellation may be in order... or maybe an animal sacrifice... Based on the location and size of the boil I'd start with a bird and work my way up.

But that's his problem, he wants to "do" penance, but his stick is broken.

Offline Miss Philicia

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Re: URGENT ingrown hair!
« Reply #18 on: October 14, 2010, 04:39:58 PM »
So far Matty's suggestion to recruit my bear-cub Portuguese homo neighbor in Apt. 3R is winning.
"Iíve slept with enough men to know that Iím not gay"

Offline Assurbanipal

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Re: URGENT ingrown hair!
« Reply #19 on: October 14, 2010, 04:41:39 PM »
... my lower penile shaft ...

You an elf or something?  How many of these do you have?
5/06 VL 1M+, CD4 22, 5% , pneumonia, thrush -- O2 support 2 months, 6/06 +Kaletra/Truvada
9/06 VL 3959 CD4 297 13.5% 12/06 VL <400 CD4 350 15.2% +Pravachol
2007 VL<400, 70, 50 CD4 408-729 16.0% -19.7%
2008 VL UD CD4 468 - 538 16.7% - 24.6% Osteoporosis 11/08 doubled Pravachol, +Calcium/D
02/09 VL 100 CD4 616 23.7% 03/09 VL 130 5/09 VL 100 CD4 540 28.4% +Actonel (osteoporosis) 7/09 VL 130
8/09  new regimen Isentress/Epzicom 9/09 VL UD CD4 621 32.7% 11/09 VL UD CD4 607 26.4% swap Isentress for Prezista/Norvir 12/09 (liver and muscle issues) VL 50
2010 VL UD CD4 573-680 26.1% - 30.9% 12/10 VL 20
2011 VL UD-20 CD4 568-673 24.7%-30.6%
2012 VL UD swap Prezista/Norvir for Reyataz drop statin CD4 768-828 26.7%-30.7%

Offline Realist

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Re: URGENT ingrown hair!
« Reply #20 on: October 14, 2010, 04:42:47 PM »
So far Matty's suggestion to recruit my bear-cub Portuguese homo neighbor in Apt. 3R is winning.

We look forward to meeting him in "Am I" tomorrow.

Can't get enough of those oral/open sore Qs
23/02/10 Tests confirmed
25/02/10 13100 220 24%
12/03/10 19800 372 19%
26/03/10 Atripla
30/04/10 58 286 23%
28/05/10 45 222 21%
25/06/10 UD 301 23%
24/09/10 UD 283 22%
01/12/10 UD 319 23%
11/03/11 UD 293 28%
10/06/11 UD 423 24%
23/08/11 UD 389 26%
28/02/11 UD 315 34%

I blogged it all http://notdownnotout.blogspot.com

Offline GSOgymrat

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Re: URGENT ingrown hair!
« Reply #21 on: October 14, 2010, 04:43:00 PM »
So far Matty's suggestion to recruit my bear-cub Portuguese homo neighbor in Apt. 3R is winning.

Sacrificing a bear cub? That'll work.  Beating it with a magic stick should do it.

Offline Matty the Damned

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Re: URGENT ingrown hair!
« Reply #22 on: October 14, 2010, 04:44:51 PM »
So far Matty's suggestion to recruit my bear-cub Portuguese homo neighbor in Apt. 3R is winning.

No pictars? This won't do. A thread like this requires pictars. Herewith some offerings from the NastyWiki:

Kangaroo! :)

What will probably happen if you don't get medical attention. :( (Severely NSFW - Plz to be not clicking kthnx!)

I have more but these should do.

For now.

MtD

Offline skeebo1969

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Re: URGENT ingrown hair!
« Reply #23 on: October 14, 2010, 04:45:12 PM »


    

   Get some of the above stuff, it worked for me on a few occassions.  Make sure to get the one that's marked boil ease drawing salve because they also have one strictly for pain relief.
I despise the song Love is in the Air, you should too.

Offline Joe K

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Re: URGENT ingrown hair!
« Reply #24 on: October 14, 2010, 05:10:52 PM »
No pictars? This won't do. A thread like this requires pictars. Herewith some offerings from the NastyWiki:

What will probably happen if you don't get medical attention. :( (Severely NSFW - Plz to be not clicking kthnx!)

I have more but these should do.

For now.

MtD

Not only did I throw up a little into my mouth, but what used to be an outy is now an inny. One look and poof, like the head of a turtle... gone.

Offline Matty the Damned

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Re: URGENT ingrown hair!
« Reply #25 on: October 14, 2010, 05:12:26 PM »
Not only did I throw up a little into my mouth, but what used to be an outy is now an inny. One look and poof, like the head of a turtle... gone.

Well you were warned babe.

MtD

Offline john33

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Re: URGENT ingrown hair!
« Reply #26 on: October 14, 2010, 05:14:13 PM »
Well you were warned babe.

MtD
this is true, but i have to ask where do you find this stuff???

Offline anniebc

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Re: URGENT ingrown hair!
« Reply #27 on: October 14, 2010, 05:15:36 PM »
Suger and soap poltice, you can't go wrong with this...it really does work.

Shave of some pieces of soap place in a pot with 1/2 spoon of sugar and heat until melted, put the mixture on some gauze place it on the affected area and wrap a bandage around it...simple

It will also increase the size of your willy during treatment, especially if you are wearing a nice tight pair of shorts... ;D

Hugs
Jan :-*
(who knows better than to click on Matty's links)
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
Never knock on deaths door..ring the bell and run..he really hates that.

Offline john33

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Re: URGENT ingrown hair!
« Reply #28 on: October 14, 2010, 05:18:13 PM »
Jan
 i suspect miss P has gone off to sacrifice the bear cub,

Mind you your remedy may be next on the list, definitely better than Anne's ;D

Offline Miss Philicia

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Re: URGENT ingrown hair!
« Reply #29 on: October 14, 2010, 05:21:49 PM »
Soap and sugar -- what are you drinking tonight, Jan?  How about a bourbon glaze and some Neutragena?
"Iíve slept with enough men to know that Iím not gay"

Offline Joe K

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Re: URGENT ingrown hair!
« Reply #30 on: October 14, 2010, 05:25:06 PM »
this is true, but i have to ask where do you find this stuff???

Baby pictures?

Offline john33

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Re: URGENT ingrown hair!
« Reply #31 on: October 14, 2010, 05:26:09 PM »
give it a try Miss P.

Some of these traditional remedies really work!!

Oh and next time try not to overdose on V

Offline anniebc

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Re: URGENT ingrown hair!
« Reply #32 on: October 14, 2010, 05:28:30 PM »
Soap and sugar -- what are you drinking tonight, Jan?  How about a bourbon glaze and some Neutragena?

It's 10.24am..I'm drinking coffee...and trust me the soap and sugar works, keep drinking that sweet bourbon but just remember, when you sober up the boil is still gonna be there...your choice Miss P.

Hugs
Jan :-*
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
Never knock on deaths door..ring the bell and run..he really hates that.

Offline Joe K

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Re: URGENT ingrown hair!
« Reply #33 on: October 14, 2010, 05:29:31 PM »
I've had boils and hot compresses are very effective at drawing the liquid to the surface. It may be the least painful way to treat it, because if it does not start going down, you may have to have it...... lanced and drained. There goes that inny again.

Offline Miss Philicia

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Re: URGENT ingrown hair!
« Reply #34 on: October 14, 2010, 05:31:34 PM »
I don't have any gauze or tape to make the bandage and we're getting hit by a nor'easter storm presently so I will have to do that tomorrow if it's still bad.
"Iíve slept with enough men to know that Iím not gay"

Offline john33

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Re: URGENT ingrown hair!
« Reply #35 on: October 14, 2010, 05:33:22 PM »
ah well iin the mean time i suggest alcohol (as in drinking). Always works wonders for me ;D

Offline Joe K

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Re: URGENT ingrown hair!
« Reply #36 on: October 14, 2010, 05:41:27 PM »
I assume you own a washcloth, use it as a warm compress to help reduce the swelling. Trust me on this, you do not want to leave it untreated for another 12 hours.

Offline skeebo1969

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Re: URGENT ingrown hair!
« Reply #37 on: October 14, 2010, 05:45:41 PM »
I don't have any gauze or tape to make the bandage and we're getting hit by a nor'easter storm presently so I will have to do that tomorrow if it's still bad.

How dare you ask for our help then blow off said advice till tomorrow... shame on you!  Should have told you to tie a string around the base of your dick and tie the other end to a 5 lbs weight.  What floor did you say you lived on again?
I despise the song Love is in the Air, you should too.

Offline Jeff G

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Re: URGENT ingrown hair!
« Reply #38 on: October 14, 2010, 05:57:23 PM »
I had one on my groin that just would not go away once . I tried all kind of over the counter and home remedy's but no luck . My dermatologist sliced and diced it out for me .

You could find somebody with braces to blow ya maybe if ya wanna do it on the cheap .   

Offline Miss Philicia

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Re: URGENT ingrown hair!
« Reply #39 on: October 14, 2010, 05:59:04 PM »
OK, I doing the hot water/washcloth as soon as the hot water arrives on the fourth floor.  I'm also still recuperating from Dr. Sia attacking my gums this afternoon at the dentist office.
"Iíve slept with enough men to know that Iím not gay"

Offline Miss Philicia

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Re: URGENT ingrown hair!
« Reply #40 on: October 14, 2010, 06:16:06 PM »
Oh yeah, that baby just popped  :o
"Iíve slept with enough men to know that Iím not gay"

Offline Matty the Damned

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Re: URGENT ingrown hair!
« Reply #41 on: October 14, 2010, 06:18:56 PM »
Oh yeah, that baby just popped  :o

Odour, colour and consistency?

MtD

/edit: 10k! Wasted on Philicia's pensu! FTW!/

Offline Miss Philicia

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Re: URGENT ingrown hair!
« Reply #42 on: October 14, 2010, 06:23:13 PM »
Odor?  There's no odor, minimal blood really, no puss at all so it's not infected -- not as painful a process as I was dreading.

ps: that crazy Rabbi is on my television, and boy is he some kinda crazy.  I'm gonna have to locate a video clip of this.
"Iíve slept with enough men to know that Iím not gay"

Offline phildinftlaudy

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Re: URGENT ingrown hair!
« Reply #43 on: October 14, 2010, 06:25:34 PM »
If it comes back at all - try a warm tea bag (an actual tea bag - not the kind of tea bag some are thinking about).

Last boil I had was on my ass cheek -- really put a crimp in my sex life (a bottom's worse fear) -- I went to the Urgent Care and they lanced it --- that shit inside it almost exploded up to the ceiling -- hurt when they cut it and squeezed it, but after that -- oh, what a relief....
September 13, 2008 - diagnosed +
Labs:
Date    CD4    %   VL     Date  CD4  %   VL
10/08  636    35  510   9/09 473  38 2900  12/4/09 Atripla
12/09  540    30    60   
12/10  740    41  <48   
8/11    667    36  <20  
03/12  1,041  42  <20
05/12  1,241  47  <20
08/12   780    37  <20
11/12   549    35  <20
02/12  1,102  42  <20
11/12   549    35  <20

Offline jkinatl2

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Re: URGENT ingrown hair!
« Reply #44 on: October 14, 2010, 06:29:59 PM »
I feel as though I have shared a real moment with you. Thank you for letting this online forum do what it does best; refresh our screens in a mixture of horror and lulz while something is born, grows, and is killed.

"Many people, especially in the gay community, turn to oral sex as a safer alternative in the age of AIDS. And with HIV rates rising, people need to remember that oral sex is safer sex. It's a reasonable alternative."

-Kimberly Page-Shafer, PhD, MPH

Welcome Thread

Offline Miss Philicia

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Re: URGENT ingrown hair!
« Reply #45 on: October 14, 2010, 06:48:35 PM »
Unfortunately I now think the trauma of popping it caused it to double in size.  I may be moving onto the sugar-soap.
"Iíve slept with enough men to know that Iím not gay"

Offline Miss Philicia

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Re: URGENT ingrown hair!
« Reply #46 on: October 14, 2010, 06:52:04 PM »
ugh, that didn't work -- 45 seconds in the microwave and the soap blew up to foul smelling chunks like marshmallows.
"Iíve slept with enough men to know that Iím not gay"

Offline Matty the Damned

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Re: URGENT ingrown hair!
« Reply #47 on: October 14, 2010, 06:52:15 PM »
Double headed eh?

The tiny mind boggles! (Click? Think first!)

MtD

Offline phildinftlaudy

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  • Posts: 2,975
  • sweet Ann what you think babe...
Re: URGENT ingrown hair!
« Reply #48 on: October 14, 2010, 06:54:46 PM »
Unfortunately I now think the trauma of popping it caused it to double in size.  I may be moving onto the sugar-soap.
Try the warm teabag - just hold it on it -- do a couple of them over the next couple of hours - that should siphon out the toxins -- just make sure you throw the teabag out after you use it  ;D
September 13, 2008 - diagnosed +
Labs:
Date    CD4    %   VL     Date  CD4  %   VL
10/08  636    35  510   9/09 473  38 2900  12/4/09 Atripla
12/09  540    30    60   
12/10  740    41  <48   
8/11    667    36  <20  
03/12  1,041  42  <20
05/12  1,241  47  <20
08/12   780    37  <20
11/12   549    35  <20
02/12  1,102  42  <20
11/12   549    35  <20

Offline Miss Philicia

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Re: URGENT ingrown hair!
« Reply #49 on: October 14, 2010, 07:02:53 PM »
toxins?  wtf

LINK PLEASE!

ps: I only use loose tea, no bags in this house
« Last Edit: October 14, 2010, 07:05:31 PM by Miss Philicia »
"Iíve slept with enough men to know that Iím not gay"

 


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