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Author Topic: Tested Today - Extremely Stressed  (Read 1388 times)

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Offline BobbyCV

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Tested Today - Extremely Stressed
« on: December 23, 2011, 01:22:56 AM »
I built up the courage today to get HIV tested for the first time.  This is way past due considering my behavior.  I've been a nervous wreck for the past two days after stumbling across a random article describing life with HIV.  I was looking forward to the holiday weekend, but I think I'm going to spend it obsessing over a potential positive result.

I did not become sexually active until three years ago, but I've slept with 50-60 girls in that time span.  Most were one night stands.  I did not use a condom with nearly half of the girls.  I'm not sure why I was so irresponsible.  When I started having sex, I was careful and used a condom 100% of the time.  Over time, I became more negligent.  Girls never seemed to care about condom use.  They would often pull me towards them or get on top despite the lack of a condom.  If I pulled away and went to get a condom, they were offended.  While this should have thrown up a red flag, I often ended up using no protection despite the effect that it could have on my life.

I've been studying statistics all day to try to calm my anxiety.  Some reports show a very low risk for a circumcised male having heterosexual sex in the US.  But, I know that one encounter is all that is necessary.  I have no clue if any of the females who I had sex with were HIV positive.  I have had sex with black females, but I always wore a condom during these encounters since I knew HIV was prevalent within this group.  I haven't been sick with anything in years, but I know that the acute HIV infection is not always noticeable or immediate.

I'm not sure how I'll be able to live with the diagnosis.  I've worked years to build muscle and I can't imagine watching it slowly waste away.  I don't know if I'll even be motivated to excel in my career or life in general.

Please provide any input possible.  I appreciate this forum as it seems to be a great resource.

Online Andy Velez

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Re: Tested Today - Extremely Stressed
« Reply #1 on: December 23, 2011, 08:39:40 AM »
Well first of all, you need to stop having unprotected intercourse. From now on everytime you have either vaginal or anal intercourse you need to be wearing a condom. No exceptions for any reason.

While it is true that it is more difficult to transmit HIV from female to male than the other way around, it is still risky. And you have had repeated risks. We are not in the guessing game here. For a conclusive and hopefully negative result you have to test at 3 months past the most recent unprotected intercourse. You can test initially at 6 weeks past the risk. If you test negative at that point then it is a good sign that you will continue to test negative at 3 months.

Good luck with your testing. 
Andy Velez

Offline BobbyCV

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Re: Tested Today - Extremely Stressed
« Reply #2 on: December 27, 2011, 06:28:47 PM »
Thank you for the response.  The results came back negative.  I did have unprotected vaginal sex recently that this test would not capture, so I may need to get retested in a few months.  I will definitely be using a condom for every sexual encounter from now on.

Online Andy Velez

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Re: Tested Today - Extremely Stressed
« Reply #3 on: December 27, 2011, 07:48:37 PM »
That's happy news about the negative result.

And also that you are committed to consistently using condoms in the future. Way to go!

Good luck on your next test.
Andy Velez


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