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Author Topic: So scared.... Penis getting sucked by a HIV man  (Read 25430 times)

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Offline ktuni

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So scared.... Penis getting sucked by a HIV man
« on: September 02, 2010, 11:59:21 PM »
I am really so scared... I just cannot focus on what I am doing.... my mind is full of this whole aids thing...

7 weeks ago, I had an unprotected insertive oral sex with a guy i don't know (me being sucked), no other sex even kissing
the process was normal and nothing special happened (e.g. I didn't see any visible blood in his mouth nor my penis),
however, after I had sex with that guy, i started to worry..... (although this is not my first time being sucked...but i really don't know why i was such worry!)

after a few days, i contacted that guy expressing my concern, he just told me i was worrying needlessly...
after a few more days, i contacted him again.... this time he seemed so annoyed by my concern
and he said something like I offend him of thinking him so dirty and said something like "oh u are so clean...I have AIDS, u worry now?? hahahah!"

at that time.. i was nearly scared to death....
in the past 6 weeks i was like living in hell....

Here is the thing:
- I got tested (a rapid test) at the 6 weeks and it came backs negative

- I searched extensively from the website, everyone just keep saying that "Receiving Oral Sex is NO RISK"....
people just keeping saying that "research shown".... but never say the reason why.... coz I want to hear a more convincing reason instead of something like "You aren't going to make history by becoming the first"
- how reliable is my 6 weeks test? .. do I need another one on 8 weeks or 10 weeks? (coz i can't forget this torture......)
- or should I just move on my life?... (forget this whole thing happened... but what if I am really the 1/20,000 guy?)..

Thank you!! I hope you guys will reply me soon as I am really so scared in this moment......

Offline Ann

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Re: So scared.... Penis getting sucked by a HIV man
« Reply #1 on: September 03, 2010, 07:14:39 AM »
ktuni,

Using the terms clean and dirty when describing someone's hiv status is extremely rude and will not be tolerated in these forums. I have hiv and I'm not dirty, thank you very much.

Getting sucked is not a risk for hiv infection. Not one person has ever been infected this way and you won't be the first.

You don't need further testing. You are conclusively hiv negative.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline ktuni

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Re: So scared.... Penis getting sucked by a HIV man
« Reply #2 on: September 03, 2010, 11:06:18 PM »
First of all, thank you for your reply

I didn't mean to be rude and I apologize for it. I just directly quoted what they guy said to me...

My test is only 6 weeks, it is conclusive enough?
I want to know why getting sucked is not a risk? Not one person has even been infected this way means sufficiently and scientifically that it is not a risk?

I am looking forward to your reply.
Thank you!

Offline Ann

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Re: So scared.... Penis getting sucked by a HIV man
« Reply #3 on: September 04, 2010, 06:25:56 AM »
Ktuni,

Getting a blowjob is absolutely NOT a risk for hiv infection. Not only is saliva not infectious, but it also contains over a dozen different proteins and enzymes that damage hiv and render it unable to infect.

Your test is conclusive where this blowjob is concerned because you did not have a risk. As long as it was done at least three months past your last incident of unprotected anal or vaginal intercourse, it is completely conclusive. You do not need further testing.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline ktuni

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Re: So scared.... Penis getting sucked by a HIV man
« Reply #4 on: September 04, 2010, 07:32:18 PM »
Ann, Thank you for your reply.

It is such a relief to here that I am not at risk from you.

But i think I want to clarify is that,
is it MY saliva or HIS saliva that damage the HIV virus?..
I mean i am the person being sucked....
so if his Saliva damages the HIV virus, then why would he still carry the virus?
isn't it quite contradicting?

I don't mean to be challenging...
but I just want to clarify this so that I can further move on my life.

Thank you!!

Looking forward to your reply!

ktuni

Offline jkinatl2

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Re: So scared.... Penis getting sucked by a HIV man
« Reply #5 on: September 05, 2010, 01:47:10 AM »
I am HIV Positive. AIDs, actually, for fifteen years. And my saliva poses ZERO risk to anyone. Not my HIV negative boyfriend, not the mother who shares my drinks or food (I told you not to order the shrimp, Mom) and not to the neighbor who shakes my hand.

HIV in infectious through VERY SPECIFIC MEANS. My saliva is not infectious. Neither is yours.

Never. Ever.

"Many people, especially in the gay community, turn to oral sex as a safer alternative in the age of AIDS. And with HIV rates rising, people need to remember that oral sex is safer sex. It's a reasonable alternative."

-Kimberly Page-Shafer, PhD, MPH

Welcome Thread

Offline Ann

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Re: So scared.... Penis getting sucked by a HIV man
« Reply #6 on: September 05, 2010, 07:25:01 AM »

It is such a relief to here that I am not at risk from you.

Of course you're not at risk from me. You cannot be infected over the internet.

Nothing I said was contradictory. Anyone's saliva will damage hiv, including an hiv positive person. Saliva isn't going to completely eradicate hiv from a person's body, because saliva is only found in the mouth, not in the blood.

The bottom line here is that you are not going to become infected while getting your dick sucked. End of story. Get over it.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline ktuni

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Re: So scared.... Penis getting sucked by a HIV man
« Reply #7 on: September 05, 2010, 07:50:48 AM »
Ann,

Thank you for your clarify.. .I apologize for my poor use of words coz I am not a native English speaker.

Based on your opinion,
it means that I do not NEED ANY FUTHER HIV TESTING right?
but what if I am really so unfortunately to be the 1/20000 person..... (or the first one in history...)

I really want to get rid of this and move on my life.... I am trying very hard to move on.

You have been such a great support for me Ann, really thank you so much!

ktuni

Offline ktuni

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Re: So scared.... Penis getting sucked by a HIV man
« Reply #8 on: September 05, 2010, 08:14:02 AM »
and I forgot to mention that I am uncut (i mean my penis)......
so does it make any difference???...

ktuni

Offline Ann

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Re: So scared.... Penis getting sucked by a HIV man
« Reply #9 on: September 05, 2010, 08:26:15 AM »
ktuni,

You don't need to be tested just because you got your dick sucked and no, it doesn't matter in the least that you're uncut. Getting your dick sucked isn't a risk for hiv infection no matter how you slice it or what details you can come up with.

If you read the Welcome Thread before posting like you're supposed to, you will have read the following posting guideline:

Quote

Anyone who continues to post excessively, questioning a conclusive negative result or no-risk situation, will be subject to a four week Time Out (a temporary ban from the Forums). If you continue to post excessively after one Time Out, you may be given a second Time Out which will last eight weeks. There is no third Time Out - it is a permanent ban. The purpose of a Time Out is to encourage you to seek the face-to-face help we cannot provide on this forum.


Please consider yourself warned!

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline ktuni

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  • Posts: 12
Re: So scared.... Penis getting sucked by a HIV man
« Reply #10 on: September 22, 2010, 03:22:00 AM »
Hello,
It's me again..

Yesterday I had another HIV rapid test at 9.5 weeks and it came back negative.

I know I have been told that NO RISK for my situation.... but I just want some reassurance.....
I didn't know how to solve my anxiety so I went to test again yesterday...

Some last questions I wanna ask:
1. I know receiving oral is NOT a risk... but what if there is some blood in the giver's mouth...? (as I know SALIVA is not infectious but BLOOD is)
2. I have my 9.5 weeks test negative, should I really move on?
3. I do not need any further testing right?... (the person at the testing site advised me to come back again at 13 weeks)
4. If I want to have a conclusive test, is 12 weeks same as 13 weeks?

Thank you again!
I promise this will be my last question!

Your words really relief my anxiety a lot...

Thank you very much!!

ktuni

Offline ktuni

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Re: So scared.... Penis getting sucked by a HIV man
« Reply #11 on: September 22, 2010, 06:30:45 AM »
1 thing I forgot to add:

My tests at 6 and 9.5 weeks were Rapid Tests (antibody tests)
they pricked my finger to collect blood (very small amount) and waited for like 10 minutes

And the test were done on a government-sponsored and recognized NGO on HIV (I live in Asia).

So is the Rapid Test (finger-pricked blood test) as good as another kinds of test?

Thanks!

ktnui

Offline jkinatl2

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Re: So scared.... Penis getting sucked by a HIV man
« Reply #12 on: September 22, 2010, 06:47:56 AM »
How many times do you need to read the same message? Saliva is not infectious. You simply DO NOT get HIV from getting your penis sucked.

"Many people, especially in the gay community, turn to oral sex as a safer alternative in the age of AIDS. And with HIV rates rising, people need to remember that oral sex is safer sex. It's a reasonable alternative."

-Kimberly Page-Shafer, PhD, MPH

Welcome Thread

Offline ktuni

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Re: So scared.... Penis getting sucked by a HIV man
« Reply #13 on: September 22, 2010, 10:30:58 PM »
How many times do you need to read the same message? Saliva is not infectious. You simply DO NOT get HIV from getting your penis sucked.



I know that SALIVA is not infectious, as I've mentioned in my previous post.

What my biggest concern is that if there is BLOOD in the giver's mouth (and a little open wound in my penis, although I don't think I had any), then will the story change? (actually this has been my greatest concern in these 2 months)

Thank you!

ktuni

Offline jkinatl2

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Re: So scared.... Penis getting sucked by a HIV man
« Reply #14 on: September 22, 2010, 11:21:05 PM »
Blood in the giver's mouth would be rendered inactive by the saliva.

It has never, ever been documented. Through several studies specifically looking for that stuff.

Your story is the same story we hear  on this site ALL the time. Seriously, you cannot produce a unique blowjob scenario to us that will somehow render you beyond the scopr of almost thirty years of scientific study.

You do not get HIV from receiving oral sex. No matter what.

You will not be allowed to continue to use this site as a way to justify your fear. It simply does not fall within the realm of either laboratory scoence or the thousands of hours of patient study in serodiscordant couples. If you get HIV form receiving oral sex, you will be an anomaly.

Likely studied for the rest of your life, which of course will mean free health care. Though to be fair, you would be donating a lot of blood to discern why your physiology differs from every other recorded human.

Seriously.

"Many people, especially in the gay community, turn to oral sex as a safer alternative in the age of AIDS. And with HIV rates rising, people need to remember that oral sex is safer sex. It's a reasonable alternative."

-Kimberly Page-Shafer, PhD, MPH

Welcome Thread

Offline ktuni

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  • Posts: 12
Re: So scared.... Penis getting sucked by a HIV man
« Reply #15 on: September 23, 2010, 11:30:44 PM »
Blood in the giver's mouth would be rendered inactive by the saliva.

It has never, ever been documented. Through several studies specifically looking for that stuff.

Your story is the same story we hear  on this site ALL the time. Seriously, you cannot produce a unique blowjob scenario to us that will somehow render you beyond the scopr of almost thirty years of scientific study.

You do not get HIV from receiving oral sex. No matter what.

You will not be allowed to continue to use this site as a way to justify your fear. It simply does not fall within the realm of either laboratory scoence or the thousands of hours of patient study in serodiscordant couples. If you get HIV form receiving oral sex, you will be an anomaly.

Likely studied for the rest of your life, which of course will mean free health care. Though to be fair, you would be donating a lot of blood to discern why your physiology differs from every other recorded human.

Seriously.



Thank you very much for your explanation.
Now I can believe that I was not infected.

However, in order to COMPLETELY forget this event (the blowjob),
I really need a final test to help me. (I know I didn't have a risk and the test will be negative, but........... i really need this to help me)

I know the conclusive test is 12/13 weeks.
If I test at 11 weeks, will it still be conclusive enough? (assume i had a risk)

Offline ktuni

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Re: So scared.... Penis getting sucked by a HIV man
« Reply #16 on: September 24, 2010, 08:09:40 AM »
and i would like to ask about the "False Positive" case of rapid test.

I am so afraid I will get a false positive results after 2 weeks
is there anything I can do to prevent it?

thank you!

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: So scared.... Penis getting sucked by a HIV man
« Reply #17 on: September 24, 2010, 08:23:56 AM »
No, there is nothing you can do to prevent a false positive. They happen sometimes. But any positive is always checked by having a western blot done. That's a more sensitive and specific test. A negative western blot result always trumps any previous positive Elisa or other test.

And now you're worrying about something that hasn't even happened yet. Is this the best you can do with your time and energy? And alll this over a very common sexual act for which in the entire history of the epidemic there has never been a single confirmed case of transmission.

Given the persistence of your fears about this issue of infection, I suggest you wait until 13 weeks to get tested. Why? Not because I expect anything other than a negative result. Because I've seen this before when someone is super anxious over a non-risk situation and tests negative before 13 weeks and then comes back saying maybe I tested too early. And the circus of fears and doubts continues. Wait the extra couple of weeks, get your negative result and then move on is my suggestion.
« Last Edit: September 24, 2010, 08:27:50 AM by Andy Velez »
Andy Velez

Offline ktuni

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Re: So scared.... Penis getting sucked by a HIV man
« Reply #18 on: September 27, 2010, 12:45:45 AM »
just one more question

which of the following test is more prone to a false positive result?
1. Rapid test (using oral fluid)
2. Rapid test (using blood from a finger-pciked)
3. Normal ELISA which need to wait 2 hours

All the test that i previously have were no.2
i heard that using blood from a finger-pricked test only RARELY give false positive right?
and it is due to factors like multiples pregnancies, vaccines or other (unknown) factors.

so I would like to ask if i have had 3 test which did not produce false positive, and if i have not acquire any recent illness such as flu or cold, the chance for my coming tests to produce a false positive is RARE?

thank for your help.

Offline RapidRod

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Re: So scared.... Penis getting sucked by a HIV man
« Reply #19 on: September 27, 2010, 04:43:04 AM »
   Anyone who continues to post excessively, questioning a conclusive negative result or no-risk situation, will be subject to a four week Time Out (a temporary ban from the Forums). If you continue to post excessively after one Time Out, you may be given a second Time Out which will last eight weeks. There is no third Time Out - it is a permanent ban. The purpose of a Time Out is to encourage you to seek the face-to-face help we cannot provide on this forum.

Offline ktuni

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Re: So scared.... Penis getting sucked by a HIV man
« Reply #20 on: September 27, 2010, 07:11:19 AM »
   Anyone who continues to post excessively, questioning a conclusive negative result or no-risk situation, will be subject to a four week Time Out (a temporary ban from the Forums). If you continue to post excessively after one Time Out, you may be given a second Time Out which will last eight weeks. There is no third Time Out - it is a permanent ban. The purpose of a Time Out is to encourage you to seek the face-to-face help we cannot provide on this forum.

I am not questioning a no risk incident.

I was just asking another questions of false positive

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: So scared.... Penis getting sucked by a HIV man
« Reply #21 on: September 27, 2010, 09:42:36 AM »
We're not going to get into considering the minutae of tests for/with you.

Those are all approved tests. If you take a test and have a specific question then ask it. Otherwise cut out the obsessive drama and get on with your life. Period.
Andy Velez

 


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