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Author Topic: Risk - Need Advice  (Read 2218 times)

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Offline tca2010

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Risk - Need Advice
« on: August 10, 2010, 10:04:23 PM »
I am a 37 year old married woman.  My husband and I were having problems last winter and one night while out at a local bar, I met someone and had sex with them.  It started out protected and then I noticed he took the condom off.  When I realized this I made him put another one on and he did.  We had been drinking and he never ejaculated that I'm aware of but I cannot guarantee this.  Now I realize this was a really stupid thing to do and believe me lesson learned on making poor decisions like the one I made that night.  Anyhow, exactly 3 weeks later I came down with something.  I had a sore throat for a month, fatigue, no high fever but I do think my temp was elevated, some lymph swelling and a sore in my mouth.  Well, unlike people who get symptoms because of the worry, I actually wasn't very worried until I got the symptoms.  I tested via Home Access at 5.5, 8, 14, 18, 23 and 31.5 weeks - all negative.  I must also mention that I have a chronic low WBC due  and a suspected autoimmune disease - suspected Lupus or Sjogrens.  I have a positive Anti-Nuclear Anitbody test and SSA antibodies.  Does the fact that I'm able to make the antibodies against my own body (as in autoimmune) mean that I should be able to make antibodies to HIV?  I am feeling really horrible and regretful about what I have done.  I haven't told my husband because I know it was a one time thing and with the negative tests I figured I was ok but I keep having doubts because my symptoms were spot on for ARS.  Any advice is welcome - Thank you!

Online RapidRod

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Re: Risk - Need Advice
« Reply #1 on: August 10, 2010, 10:07:42 PM »
You way over tested. You don't have HIV.

Offline Ann

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  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: Risk - Need Advice
« Reply #2 on: August 10, 2010, 10:22:35 PM »
tca,

Autoimmune diseases make one more prone to false positive results on hiv antibody testing rather than the other way around. You are without doubt hiv negative.

Don't let your feelings of guilt make you feel otherwise. You do not have hiv and that's conclusive.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline tca2010

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Re: Risk - Need Advice
« Reply #3 on: August 10, 2010, 10:37:25 PM »
Thank you both - I appreciate your answers. 

Offline tca2010

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  • Posts: 9
Re: Risk - Need Advice
« Reply #4 on: August 11, 2010, 12:28:04 PM »
Sorry but I just want to ask this last question - so it doesn't matter what my symptoms were, I am definitely negative?

Offline tca2010

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Re: Risk - Need Advice
« Reply #5 on: August 11, 2010, 12:52:25 PM »
Anyone?

Online RapidRod

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Re: Risk - Need Advice
« Reply #6 on: August 11, 2010, 01:09:46 PM »
No it doesn't matter.  If you are concerned about your symptoms see your doctor they have nothing to do with HIV.

Offline tca2010

  • Member
  • Posts: 9
Re: Risk - Need Advice
« Reply #7 on: August 24, 2010, 09:59:40 PM »
Not sure if I needed to start a new thread for this question or not.  My question is I see that Ann has stated numerous times that ARS symptoms (if they occur) are the result of antibody production and not just the virus itself.  I see conflicting information about this as WebMD says antibodies have nothing to do with ARS.  I am not doubting the correctness of the information Ann is giving but just wondering if there was specific research done on this or where this information came from.  Thank you.

Offline Ann

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  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: Risk - Need Advice
« Reply #8 on: August 25, 2010, 06:18:00 AM »
tca,

The information I give about antibody production and ARS comes from my doctor, who is a highly respected and much published hiv pharmacologist, researcher, and clinician. I've also read it, but I cannot remember where.

The bottom line in your case is that we KNOW that the vast majority of people who have actually been infected will seroconvert and test positive by six WEEKS. You tested out to nearly eight MONTHS.

You do not have hiv. You CONCLUSIVELY  do not have hiv. If you feel unwell, see your doctor. Whatever is going on has absolutely nothing to do with hiv, as you do not HAVE hiv.

If you read the Welcome Thread before posting like you're supposed to, you will have read the following posting guideline:

Quote

Anyone who continues to post excessively, questioning a conclusive negative result or no-risk situation, will be subject to a four week Time Out (a temporary ban from the Forums). If you continue to post excessively after one Time Out, you may be given a second Time Out which will last eight weeks. There is no third Time Out - it is a permanent ban. The purpose of a Time Out is to encourage you to seek the face-to-face help we cannot provide on this forum.


Please consider yourself warned!

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline tca2010

  • Member
  • Posts: 9
Re: Risk - Need Advice
« Reply #9 on: August 25, 2010, 09:04:59 AM »
Thank you Ann for your help.  I will trust my result.

Offline tca2010

  • Member
  • Posts: 9
Re: Risk - Need Advice
« Reply #10 on: September 11, 2010, 08:19:13 PM »
I have an update on my situation.  I ended up testing again 38 weeks post exposure and it was negative (Home Access).  However, the Sunday before I tested I work up with a very sore swollen glands on the back of my neck to the point where it was uncomfortable to turn my head, a fever and severe congestion.  So, my test was 5 days after the start of these symptoms.  Is there any way this could be ARS?  I was very happy to get my negative 9 month result and was content to let it go but these symptoms are downright scary.  I took an antibiotic because I thought this could be a sinus infection and although my symptoms have improved some, I still have some swelling of the glands (under my arms a little as well) and a little congestion.  Can ARS occur this late?

Offline Ann

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  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: Risk - Need Advice
« Reply #11 on: September 12, 2010, 08:47:51 AM »
tca,

Instead of assuming every little twinge you get is hiv, and instead of taking antibiotics without a doctor's prescription, why don't you just go and see a doctor?

You don't have hiv. I don't care what symptoms you're getting, you just don't have hiv. Go to a doctor and find out what is really wrong with you.

I'm giving you that time out you've been warned about. Do not attempt to create a new account to get around your time out because if you do, you will be permanently banned.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline tca2010

  • Member
  • Posts: 9
Re: Risk - Need Advice
« Reply #12 on: April 15, 2011, 05:32:49 PM »
I have recently had another exposure on 2/18/11.  This is my first possible exposure since Dec 2009.
I performed oral sex on a bisexual man and swallowed.  This was a one time incident and there was no other intercourse.  About 8-9 days later I came down with muscle aches and a slight fever.  This lasted a few days and then a couple weeks after this I had swollen glands on one side of
my neck and under both my arms.  The glands under my arms are still sore and swollen, although not as much.  I haven't tested yet and wondering if I need to. 

I know that oral sex ranges from no risk to low risk but i worry because of my symptoms and the fact I swallowed.

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: Risk - Need Advice
« Reply #13 on: April 15, 2011, 05:39:16 PM »
Although from time to time people claim to have been infected through giving oral, those claims never seem to hold up under careful examnation.

There is much more solid evidence that giving oral is not a risk. Very longterm studies of sero-discordant couples who had lots of mutual oral and only protected vaginal/anal intercourse have resulted in not a single sero-negative partner having become infected. Your own saliva contains over a dozen elements and proteins which very effective prevent the transmission of viable HIV.

So I don't consider your giving oral to be a genuine risk. But if you are going to go into another of your prolonged worries about it, then just get tested at 13 weeks and collect the inevtiable negative result.

 
Andy Velez

Offline tca2010

  • Member
  • Posts: 9
Re: Risk - Need Advice
« Reply #14 on: April 16, 2011, 04:39:07 PM »
Thanks Andy.  If I keep stressing then I will
take a test at 12 weeks.   Problem is I'm really nervous about testing.  I know it's no excuse not to test but how do deal with the fear.  It's weird that I didn't feel as nervous about testing after the exposure in '09.  Maybe getting tested at a clinic rather than using Home Access would help?

Offline Andy Velez

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  • Member
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Re: Risk - Need Advice
« Reply #15 on: April 16, 2011, 07:20:29 PM »
The only reason for you to get tested is for your peace of mind and not because you had a real risk, because you didn't.


As far as being afraid to test, wouldn't that be better than having your fears gnawing away at you? Just seems obvious to me but you have to decide.
Andy Velez

 


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