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Author Topic: For Bobbi (AKA Maggie)  (Read 8093 times)

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Offline LincolnStreet

  • Member
  • Posts: 4
For Bobbi (AKA Maggie)
« on: July 10, 2010, 11:06:20 PM »
Hello All,

My mother went by the name Maggie on this board.  Her real name was Bobbi.
She's been positive for approximately 17 years. 
She passed away this morning by committing suicide.
I wanted to let her online friends know. 
My mom enjoyed this board.  So, thank  you all for being her friends.

--Traci

Offline newby05

  • Member
  • Posts: 41
Re: My Mom-- Maggie Passed Away
« Reply #1 on: July 10, 2010, 11:11:29 PM »
Very, very sorry to hear about your loss. My thoughts are with you.

Offline Ann

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  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: My Mom-- Maggie Passed Away
« Reply #2 on: July 10, 2010, 11:18:35 PM »
Traci, I'm terribly upset to hear this news. I knew she was having a difficult time, but had no idea things had gotten this bad. I guess I thought it was a case of "no news is good news". How wrong I obviously was.

Bobbi and I used to chat for hours online. She was a lovely woman, and she'll live on in my heart.

Traci, take care of yourself. Your mother loved you very much, please remember that. She wouldn't have wanted to cause you any pain, she only wanted to end her own pain.

You're in my thoughts.

Thank you for letting us know this sad news.

Hugs and condolences,
Ann
xxx
« Last Edit: July 10, 2010, 11:20:35 PM by Ann »
Condoms are a girl's best friend

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"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline hotpuppy

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  • Posts: 555
Re: My Mom-- Maggie Passed Away
« Reply #3 on: July 10, 2010, 11:21:49 PM »
Traci,
   I'm so very sorry to hear about your Mom.  Thank you for sharing with us and thinking of us in your time of need.  If we can help you with any questions please don't hesitate to ask.   I don't know the details but I would hope that she didn't suffer.  I can't seem to come up with words that would express the right sentiment and show respect for you and her.  Please accept my condolences.

-Brian
Don't obsess over the wrong things.  Life isn't about your numbers, it isn't about this forum, it isn't about someone's opinion.  It's about getting out there and enjoying it.   I am a person with HIV - not the other way around.

Offline LincolnStreet

  • Member
  • Posts: 4
Re: My Mom-- Maggie Passed Away
« Reply #4 on: July 10, 2010, 11:31:17 PM »
Thank you all for your kind words.
Ann, I was hoping to find you on here.  I remember my mom talking about your chats.
Per her wishes, there will be no services.
We did everything we could for her.  Her depression had really reached the bottom these last few months.   She would hardly leave her bedroom or eat. Despite our insisting, she wouldn't go to the doctor or take her meds the way she was supposed to. 

Offline Ann

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  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: My Mom-- Maggie Passed Away
« Reply #5 on: July 10, 2010, 11:43:05 PM »
Depression is a terrible thing. Your poor mom. It's heartbreaking.

How is Ed doing? You don't have to answer that if you don't want to. I'm just concerned about all of you.

While she didn't want services, I'm sure she'll be remembered at this years AIDSmeds Gathering to be held in Las Vegas later this summer. They always hold a memorial ceremony for those who have passed.

You may wish to post a thread in the In Memoriam forum. It's indexed, so people who knew her can find it easily and post.

Hugs,
Ann
xxx
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline skeebo1969

  • Member
  • Posts: 5,707
Re: My Mom-- Maggie Passed Away
« Reply #6 on: July 10, 2010, 11:59:11 PM »


 Traci,

  I am saddened by the news of your mother's passing.  You have my sincerest condolences.

  RIP Maggie/

  Thomas
I despise the song Love is in the Air, you should too.

Offline GSOgymrat

  • Member
  • Posts: 5,052
  • HIV+ since 1993. INTJ
Re: My Mom-- Maggie Passed Away
« Reply #7 on: July 11, 2010, 12:30:53 AM »
I'm so sorry your mom has passed. Such sad news.

Ford

Offline runnergal

  • Member
  • Posts: 28
Re: My Mom-- Maggie Passed Away
« Reply #8 on: July 11, 2010, 12:32:01 AM »
I am so sorry,  may she rest in peace.

Offline tednlou2

  • Member
  • Posts: 5,081
Re: My Mom-- Maggie Passed Away
« Reply #9 on: July 11, 2010, 12:50:55 AM »
I'm sorry for your loss.  Depression is an awful thing.  I've mentioned to my HIV clinic that the docs need to inquire more about their patients mental health.  I know no one asked me about depression at my clinic.  I had to bring it up.   

Wishing you all the best getting through this difficult time.

Offline anniebc

  • Member
  • Posts: 5,956
  • AM member since 2003
Re: My Mom-- Maggie Passed Away
« Reply #10 on: July 11, 2010, 01:00:06 AM »
Dear God this is sad news, I'm so sorry for your loss Traci, Maggie and I used to chat quite a bit in the early days, I remember sending her one of my painting, for one of her grandchildren I think.

Like Ann I thought "no news is good news" depression is a terrible illness, please know you and your family are in my thoughts.

R.I.P. Bobbi (Maggie)
In sadness
Jan :'(
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
Never knock on deaths door..ring the bell and run..he really hates that.

Offline LincolnStreet

  • Member
  • Posts: 4
Re: My Mom-- Maggie Passed Away
« Reply #11 on: July 11, 2010, 01:17:33 AM »
Ann--and everyone,
Ed is doing as well as could be expected at this point I suppose. 
He is, of course, second guessing every thing he's ever said or done. I'm even finding myself rewinding the events of the last few months in my mind now.  I don't know what else could have been done. 
 
My mom left the house before Ed was up this morning, drove to a railroad crossing, and layed down on the tracks until a train came.  He didn't hear her leave the house.  When he woke up he thought she went out to buy cigarettes.  A passerby found her vehicle at the crossing and called the police, who later found her body.  According to police, the train had a video and it shows her leaving her vehicle and laying down on the tracks.  I'm just in shock and cannot even believe that this has happened....or that I am even on here typing this. 

Jan-- I do remember something about a painting.  I think maybe that was for my niece.  Thank you.

--Traci 

Offline Inchlingblue

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Re: My Mom-- Maggie Passed Away
« Reply #12 on: July 11, 2010, 02:20:10 AM »
Bobbi's depression and desperation seemed to be directly connected to not being able to access affordable health care.

I just wanted to point that out because I think it's important. I hope America wakes up.

Traci, thank you for letting us know what happened. It was obvious from interacting with Maggie on these forums that she was a kind and lovely person.
« Last Edit: July 11, 2010, 10:47:52 AM by Inchlingblue »

Offline J.R.E.

  • Member
  • Posts: 7,277
  • Joined Dec-2003 Living positive, since 1985.
Re: My Mom-- Maggie Passed Away
« Reply #13 on: July 11, 2010, 03:01:35 AM »
Dear Traci,

I am so very sorry to hear about your mom.  My heart, and my thoughts got out to all of you.


In sadness-----Ray
Current Meds ; Viramune, Epzicom, 40mg of simvastatin, 25 mg of Hydrochlorothiazide.
Metoprolol tartrate 25mg



http://forums.poz.com/index.php?topic=40802.0

http://forums.poz.com/index.php?topic=45159.0

http://forums.poz.com/index.php?topic=39722.msg495621;topicseen#msg495621

http://forums.poz.com/index.php?topic=46806.0

http://forums.poz.com/index.php?topic=39414.msg491701#msg491701


Diagnosed positive in 1985,.. In October of 2003, My t-cell count was 16, Viral load was over 500,000, Percentage at that time was 5%. I started on  HAART on October 24th, 2003.

 As of 8/25/14,  t-cells are at 402, Viral load <40

 Current % is at 11%

  
 63 years young.

Offline anniebc

  • Member
  • Posts: 5,956
  • AM member since 2003
For Bobbi (AKA Maggie)
« Reply #14 on: July 11, 2010, 07:52:59 PM »


Sometimes to stop hurting we have to stop breathing.

Bobbi I'm sorry you were hurting so much..if we knew could we have stopped you? somehow I don't think so, your pain was too deep.

R.I.P Bobbi

In sadness
Jan :'(
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
Never knock on deaths door..ring the bell and run..he really hates that.

Offline Matty the Damned

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  • Ninja Please
Re: My Mom-- Maggie Passed Away
« Reply #15 on: July 12, 2010, 03:17:06 AM »
Traci,

My condolences to you and your family regarding the death of your mother,

Vale Maggie. :(

MtD

Offline BT65

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  • Member
  • Posts: 10,088
Re: My Mom-- Maggie Passed Away
« Reply #16 on: July 12, 2010, 05:27:36 PM »
Oh Traci, I am so, so sorry.  May she rest in peace. :'(
I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

Offline Joe K

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  • Member
  • Posts: 3,877
  • 31 Years Poz
Re: My Mom-- Maggie Passed Away
« Reply #17 on: July 12, 2010, 07:48:38 PM »
Dear Traci,

My deepest condolences on the loss of your mother. I also suffer from depression and I have experienced the utter hopelessness and despair that depression brings. If there is anything I can do to help, please feel free to PM me.

Offline Jody

  • Member
  • Posts: 1,843
Re: My Mom-- Maggie Passed Away
« Reply #18 on: July 12, 2010, 09:20:25 PM »
Dear Traci...Maggie has been a contributor here on this website for many years now and her experiences helped others in the same or similar situation.  I am deeply saddened that the end was so awful for Maggie and she felt as awful as she did.  Often I believe folks want to spare others the stress of perhaps caring for them or other factors but do know that your mom was a fine person that we all got to know some and I know she rests in peace now and I hope your family and ours here can heal.

Jody  :'(
"Wake up to find out that you are the eyes of the world".
 "Try to discover that you are the song that the morning brings."

Grateful Dead

Offline David_CA

  • Member
  • Posts: 3,246
  • Joined: March 2006
Re: My Mom-- Maggie Passed Away
« Reply #19 on: July 13, 2010, 08:15:48 AM »
Traci,

I'm sorry for your loss and the situation leading to it.  You're in my thoughts.
Black Friday 03-03-2006
03-23-06 CD4 359 @27.4% VL 75,938
06-01-06 CD4 462 @24.3% VL > 100,000
08-15-06 CD4 388 @22.8% VL >  "
10-21-06 CD4 285 @21.9% VL >  "
  Atripla started 12-01-2006
01-08-07 CD4 429 @26.8% VL 1872!
05-08-07 CD4 478 @28.1% VL 740
08-03-07 CD4 509 @31.8% VL 370
11-06-07 CD4 570 @30.0% VL 140
02-21-08 CD4 648 @32.4% VL 600
05-19-08 CD4 695 @33.1% VL < 48 undetectable!
08-21-08 CD4 725 @34.5%
11-11-08 CD4 672 @39.5%
02-11-09 CD4 773 @36.8%
05-11-09 CD4 615 @36.2%
08-19-09 CD4 770 @38.5%
11-19-09 CD4 944 @33.7%
02-17-10 CD4 678 @39.9%  
06-03-10 CD4 768 @34.9%
09-21-10 CD4 685 @40.3%
01-10-11 CD4 908 @36.3%
05-23-11 CD4 846 @36.8% VL 80
02-13-12 CD4 911 @41.4% VL<20
You must be the change you want to see in the world.  Mahatma Gandhi

Offline metekrop

  • Member
  • Posts: 364
Re: My Mom-- Maggie Passed Away
« Reply #20 on: July 13, 2010, 08:26:51 AM »
This is very sad.
Diag on Dec 8, 2000, CD 440 VL 44K, No Meds
Dec/08 - Feb/09 CD< 50 & VL >500k hosp'z.
St. Atripla - July/09 CD 179, VL 197k
Oct/09 CD 300 VL UD Chol 267
Mar/10 CD 468 UD, Ch 220
Aug/10 CD 460 UD, Ch 195
Dec/10 CD 492 UD, Ch 172
Mar/11 CD 636 UD, Ch 201
Aug/11 CD 530 UD, Ch 98
Jan/12 cd 616 UD, ch 189
Jul/12 CD 640 UD, Ch ?
Dec/12 CD 669 Ud, Ch 125
May/7 CD711 Ud, Ch?
Nov/ 22 663 UD, Ch,
April 17 CD 797,
Oct, 14 CD 810 UD

Offline siongi

  • Member
  • Posts: 42
Re: My Mom-- Maggie Passed Away
« Reply #21 on: July 13, 2010, 09:21:01 AM »
Dear Traci,

Very sad to learn of your mom's demise. I wish you and rest of your family God's strength.

Siongi

Offline LincolnStreet

  • Member
  • Posts: 4
Re: My Mom-- Maggie Passed Away
« Reply #22 on: July 17, 2010, 05:56:23 PM »
Thank you to everyone for your kind thoughts and messages. 
My mom loved this online community, and I know many of you were a great help to her during difficult times. I wish you all the very best. 

--Traci

Offline Ann

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  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: For Bobbi (AKA Maggie)
« Reply #23 on: April 14, 2011, 06:28:44 AM »
It's been nearly a year since Bobbi took her life and when I think about her circumstances it still feels as awful and raw as it did a year ago.

In the course of letting a long-time forum member know of Bobbi's passing, I discovered that her main thread was deep in the archives in the Living forum, so I merged it here with Jan's thread. I don't want Bobbi to ever be forgotten.

She was such a sweet, gentle woman. I don't recall if she posted much in the public forum about her struggles to access health care, but she did PM me about it from time to time. As someone else in this thread said, I hope America wakes up. I cannot help but wonder how many others take their own lives in desperation and depression over their health care - or more to the point, the lack of it. With the ADAP crisis having no real end in sight, I really hope America wakes up before it's too late.

I miss you Bobbi. I hope you are finally at peace and no longer in pain.

Ann
« Last Edit: April 14, 2011, 06:35:34 AM by Ann »
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline Inchlingblue

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Re: For Bobbi (AKA Maggie)
« Reply #24 on: April 14, 2011, 08:22:35 AM »
Thanks for reviving the thread, Ann.
« Last Edit: April 14, 2011, 08:24:15 AM by Inchlingblue »

 


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