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Author Topic: Such fun... just way too much fun  (Read 2511 times)

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Offline Miss Philicia

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  • celebrity poster, faker & poser
Such fun... just way too much fun
« on: May 07, 2010, 03:43:41 PM »
So I just found out a few hours ago that my bestest dearest friend back from my days in NYC (we've know each other almost 20 years) not only has PCP but has been in the hospital now for 10 days, and is expected to be in there for another five days.  He's very much he secretive type, and is well versed in taking multiple drug holidays.  I long ago gave up nagging him on the folly of such things.  He was diagnosed at at the same time I was around '93, though he's a good five years younger than me.  However, he'd only been recently infected that year whereas I had a good (at least) five years more on him, so I had to go on AZT immediately even and endure listening to him telling me that they were nothing more than poison pills and he would never, ever take them.

By the time HAART arrived his numbers were tanking (though not horribly) and he went on treatment, but he was always what I'd call "creative" with his intake, skipping days and only taking half doses, etc.  He said he knew his body better than Dr. Bellman,  one of the preeminent doctors for HIV in NYC, and who yelled at my friend to know end.  Never did any good, and I could never ascertain really what his lab numbers were as he'd always shift the subject.  As my lipoatrophy quickly became apparent he looked at me as some sort of vindication that his degree from beauty school was superior to a medical degree from Cornell.  I always had a bit of guilt that my body shape changes only served to reinforce that what he was doing was right, even if I completely know that was bullshit -- and it wasn't just him but I also saw it other friends, as I've always had a large group of friends who all became infected around the same time.

So any way, I've been crying all afternoon (or as much as I can cry... I'm not a large tear producer unless I'm watching a sappy movie like Terms of Endearment but I've still gotten horribly, horribly upset.  I've talked a mutual friend here in NYC to drive me up to NYC-Presbyterian to see him tomorrow afternoon, and I know it will really cheer him up because he sounds just awful on the phone, though with still a few giggle moments.  I know PCP treatment is much better, but I still can't even get him to tell me what his lab numbers are and knowing him I'd not believe what he told me unless I had access to his medical chart.

Well fuck this AIDS crap... it really sucks.  I may stay overnight at a friends place in Brooklyn, or maybe three nights, and visit him more than just one afternoon.  I'd be lying if I did't say I was livid.
"Iíve slept with enough men to know that Iím not gay"

Offline BT65

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Re: Such fun... just way too much fun
« Reply #1 on: May 07, 2010, 06:19:12 PM »
Oh Ms. P, I'm so sorry this is happening.  Of course you know we have absolutely no control over what other people want to do regarding their health.  It's great he has such a good friend in you.  I hope your visit goes well, and that you feel more at ease once you see him.  Here's a kiss to ya- :-*
I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

Offline WillyWump

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  • Posts: 7,281
Re: Such fun... just way too much fun
« Reply #2 on: May 07, 2010, 06:22:11 PM »
Sorry P :(

I'm sure he'll love seeing you.  hope he get's better soon.

-Will
POZ since '08

Last Labs-
11-6-14 CD4- 871, UD
6/3/14 CD4- 736, UD 34%
6/25/13 CD4- 1036, UD,
2/4/13, CD4 - 489, UD, 28%

Current Meds: Prezista/Epzicom/ Norvir
.

Offline leatherman

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Re: Such fun... just way too much fun
« Reply #3 on: May 07, 2010, 06:35:02 PM »
that's so sad to hear about someone letting their health issues go like that. Has your friend ever dealt with an issue like this over the years? Maybe this "little" visit to the hospital with put, if you'll pardon the expression, the fear of god into him. We've all seen plenty of people blithely going along saying it won't happen to them - until it does happen to them. Afterwards they often sing a different song. (what can I say? I'm an eternal optimist ;D )

I hope you have a good visit with your friend. :-*
leatherman (aka mIkIE)


chart from 1992-2013; updated 2/09/13  Reyataz/Norvir/Truvada

Offline OneTampa

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  • "Butterflies are free."
Re: Such fun... just way too much fun
« Reply #4 on: May 07, 2010, 11:29:27 PM »
Miss P. I am so sorry to hear about your friend.  I can understand that you are livid. You've done the SAT (show and tell) now it is time to see if the SAS (say and slap) does any good.    I truly hope he pulls through and heeds sense.

Best.
"He is my oldest child. The shy and retiring one over there with the Haitian headdress serving pescaŪto frito."

Offline GNYC09

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Re: Such fun... just way too much fun
« Reply #5 on: May 08, 2010, 09:38:28 AM »
Sorry to hear that Miss P.  And it's raining in NYC right now to boot  :-[

I'm curious as to why he took his pill holidays.  Was it due to cost or maybe the side effects he experienced?

Offline Jeff G

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  • How am I doing Beren ?
Re: Such fun... just way too much fun
« Reply #6 on: May 08, 2010, 09:45:32 AM »
Sorry Miss P .... I really am ...

Offline bear60

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Re: Such fun... just way too much fun
« Reply #7 on: May 08, 2010, 10:34:21 AM »
Sorry to hear this news,  David.  Its good that you are able to go see him.
Poz Bear Type in Philadelphia

Offline pozniceguy

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Re: Such fun... just way too much fun
« Reply #8 on: May 08, 2010, 01:00:27 PM »
My sympathies David  for you and for him  some people are just not living in reality  and as usual  they only hear what they want to hear.......seeing him will make both of you feel better....

Nick
remember the good times...honor the past but don't live there
Le stelle la notte sono grandie luminose, nel cuore profondo del Texas

Offline aztecan

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  • Posts: 5,430
  • 29 years positive, 57 years a pain in the butt
Re: Such fun... just way too much fun
« Reply #9 on: May 13, 2010, 01:01:13 PM »
I also am sorry to hear of your friend's situation.

As Betty pointed out, we can't dictate the lives of others. That is something I have had to learn, and it wasn't easy for me.

Here's a big hug for you, and your friend.

I will be sending hopeful energy to you.

HUGS,

Mark
"May your life preach more loudly than your lips."
~ William Ellery Channing (Unitarian Minister)

Offline RapidRod

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Re: Such fun... just way too much fun
« Reply #10 on: May 13, 2010, 01:09:08 PM »
This has been a day of sad news. Hope your friend has a speedy recovery P.

Offline Miss Philicia

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  • celebrity poster, faker & poser
Re: Such fun... just way too much fun
« Reply #11 on: May 13, 2010, 03:05:13 PM »
Sorry, I should have updated this thread and provided some needed closure. 

I managed to get a mutual friend to drive me up to NYC on Saturday and spent a couple hours at the hospital with my friend and his partner.  I'd not yet met the partner as they've only been together this past year, though they have moved in together.  Frankly I don't even know if the partner is positive or negative.  Then Tuesday I called my friend again and he'd just been released from the hospital and his voice already sounded back to normal.  Still I think that was around a 13 day hospital stay which sounds overly lengthy for PCP in the year 2010 so I wonder if there's not more to all of this -- my friend is so secretive with health stuff and it's hard to extract information.  If his partner is negative I'm sure he's not got a clue either.
"Iíve slept with enough men to know that Iím not gay"

Offline bear60

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Re: Such fun... just way too much fun
« Reply #12 on: May 14, 2010, 01:04:58 PM »
Thanks for the update David. 
I know you are glad to have been able to visit your friend.
If he is being secretive about his medical problems, it doesnt seem out of character.  People dont often change.
Poz Bear Type in Philadelphia

Offline BT65

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Re: Such fun... just way too much fun
« Reply #13 on: May 14, 2010, 04:55:50 PM »
That's nice you got to go see him.  I'm sure he appreciated that.  Not much more you can do.
I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

 


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