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Author Topic: OMG what Is THIS Critter....???  (Read 5606 times)

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Offline Lwood

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OMG what Is THIS Critter....???
« on: August 24, 2006, 09:42:01 AM »
I found a curious set of prints on the patio this morn'  Im recon its a  raccoon, or possibly possum,  way too big to be a squirrel or rat,  definitely not wabbit...  < shudder >    and probablly not the kitty that Gaked up the  toxic hairball in the driveway a while back....
 Anyone with tracking experience ???


P.S. I have no problem with a night  visitor or two partying it up on my patio, Im actually kinda flattered. Its just the ones that turn my garden into a salad bar that kindof annoy me..
"Fortunately, I Keep My T Cells Numbered For Just Such An Emergency"
  -Either Foghorn Leghorn or Johnny Cash

Offline allopathicholistic

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Re: OMG what Is THIS Critter....???
« Reply #1 on: August 24, 2006, 09:50:06 AM »
I'm gonna guess raccoon

Offline Dachshund

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Re: OMG what Is THIS Critter....???
« Reply #2 on: August 24, 2006, 09:58:03 AM »
I think it is a Pensacola Purple Beaver.

[attachment deleted by admin]

Offline RapidRod

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Re: OMG what Is THIS Critter....???
« Reply #3 on: August 24, 2006, 10:02:46 AM »
It's time for the live trap again. Just put some dry cat food in it and we'll see.

Offline Lwood

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Re: OMG what Is THIS Critter....???
« Reply #4 on: August 24, 2006, 10:13:44 AM »
Beavers ???    oh dear Gawd.....
"Fortunately, I Keep My T Cells Numbered For Just Such An Emergency"
  -Either Foghorn Leghorn or Johnny Cash

Offline Ann

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Re: OMG what Is THIS Critter....???
« Reply #5 on: August 24, 2006, 10:15:46 AM »
Looks like cat to me. It's nothing like a racoon - their prints look like tiny hand prints.

I'm more worried about what looks like spots of blood!  :o
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline Dachshund

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Re: OMG what Is THIS Critter....???
« Reply #6 on: August 24, 2006, 10:21:20 AM »
Not to hijack but..........Ann if I step on that drop of blood wearing socks and shoes can I still get HIV? Huh? Can I? Can I? Can I? Huh? You sure? Can I? Huh?


Worried :-*

Offline jkinatl2

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Re: OMG what Is THIS Critter....???
« Reply #7 on: August 24, 2006, 10:28:17 AM »
Daschund,

Raccoon AIDS, or RAIDS, is primarily spread through washing bread in a running creek and then consuming it. You can also get it from rummaging through trash cans and yes, from stepping in pawprints.

I have footnoted this information with astonishingly obscure sources that I damn well know that no one will actually read. It makes me feel superior.

http://www.i-am-bored.com/





"Many people, especially in the gay community, turn to oral sex as a safer alternative in the age of AIDS. And with HIV rates rising, people need to remember that oral sex is safer sex. It's a reasonable alternative."

-Kimberly Page-Shafer, PhD, MPH

Welcome Thread

Offline Ann

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Re: OMG what Is THIS Critter....???
« Reply #8 on: August 24, 2006, 10:29:10 AM »
Hal,

Ok then, if you're a good boy you can have it, but only this once, just because you asked nice.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline Dachshund

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Re: OMG what Is THIS Critter....???
« Reply #9 on: August 24, 2006, 10:36:27 AM »
Daschund,

Raccoon AIDS, or RAIDS, is primarily spread through washing bread in a running creek and then consuming it. You can also get it from rummaging through trash cans and yes, from stepping in pawprints.

I have footnoted this information with astonishingly obscure sources that I damn well know that no one will actually read. It makes me feel superior.

http://www.i-am-bored.com/








Okay so let me get this straight...If you get HIV from raccoons that is RAIDS. I slept with Rosario from "Will and Grace" and got MAIDS. Is that correct? If I look at a raccoon without my glasses on can I still get RAIDS? Please help me!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Misinformed in Memphis

Offline Ann

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Re: OMG what Is THIS Critter....???
« Reply #10 on: August 24, 2006, 10:52:22 AM »
Jeeze Hal, first you want hiv, now you want RAIDS and MAIDS too? This is going too far. What you really seem to have is FRAIDS. Think you're stuck with it matey!

Disenchanted in Dachshundland
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline Dachshund

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Re: OMG what Is THIS Critter....???
« Reply #11 on: August 24, 2006, 10:58:08 AM »
OKOKOKOKOKOKOKOKOKOKOKOK......just one more question pleeeeeeeze!!!!!!!!

If I do get AIDS, RAIDS or MAIDS, and I take my medicine like a good boy...will I have FAIDS?

You guys are the best!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
 :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* -*

Offline ACinKC

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Re: OMG what Is THIS Critter....???
« Reply #12 on: August 24, 2006, 10:59:58 AM »
HOLY SHIT THIS IS FUNNY AS HELL!!!

Ann,

Please Ive been experiencing some wierd symptoms lately. For the past 2 months I cant stop climbing trees, my neighbor's garbage cans seem to be calling my name in the middle of the night and my hair is changing... have a look.


I've got RAIDS i KNOW it.  When should I test?
LIFE is not a race to the grave with the intention of arriving safely
in a pretty and well-preserved body, but, rather to skid in broadside,
thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming--WOW! WHAT A
RIDE!!!

Offline Ann

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Re: OMG what Is THIS Critter....???
« Reply #13 on: August 24, 2006, 11:17:23 AM »
Hal, I got some medicine for you boy... come and get it.

Andrew, you need to test when you find yourself walking on all fours. You'll get to the clinic quicker then.

Dumbstruck in Downtown

PS... you both need to know that it's not the garbage can you do, it's how you do it that matters.
« Last Edit: August 24, 2006, 11:19:28 AM by Ann »
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline Lwood

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Re: OMG what Is THIS Critter....???
« Reply #14 on: August 24, 2006, 11:35:24 AM »
Whoa,
 Exceptionally good eye Ann,
Thats actually a drop of a Liquid Iron supliment  that I dosed  the shrubs with awhile back when the started to yellow, it leaves disturbing stains ( Iron oxide,, ie. RUST )  and Im pretty carefull with it but I guess there was a bit of dribble..  not to worrry OJ hasn't been by,, that I know of...   
 Now that opens up a whole new set of possibilities as far as nighttime visitors...   







"Fortunately, I Keep My T Cells Numbered For Just Such An Emergency"
  -Either Foghorn Leghorn or Johnny Cash

Offline Ann

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Re: OMG what Is THIS Critter....???
« Reply #15 on: August 24, 2006, 11:44:34 AM »
Lwood, do you always dribble?

Wondering in Wonderland
(who is NOT talking basketball or iron oxide)
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline ACinKC

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Re: OMG what Is THIS Critter....???
« Reply #16 on: August 24, 2006, 11:48:24 AM »
OMG is dribbling a symptom?  I have been doing that a lot lately.  Shit. I know i have it now.  Dribbling means I have it doesn't it.  Can someone please answer me like Andy or RapidRod, someone who KNOWs what they are talking about. 
LIFE is not a race to the grave with the intention of arriving safely
in a pretty and well-preserved body, but, rather to skid in broadside,
thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming--WOW! WHAT A
RIDE!!!

Offline Dachshund

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Re: OMG what Is THIS Critter....???
« Reply #17 on: August 24, 2006, 12:05:08 PM »
OMG is dribbling a symptom?  I have been doing that a lot lately.  Shit. I know i have it now.  Dribbling means I have it doesn't it.  Can someone please answer me like Andy or RapidRod, someone who KNOWs what they are talking about. 


According to Dr. Dingus over at The Body.Com dribbling is a sign of retardation, not HIV. So clearly ACinKC you have absolutely nothing to worry about, you don't have AIDS, but you are a retard.

Sorry, we can't help you here and we suggest you get professional help.
 ;D

Offline ACinKC

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Re: OMG what Is THIS Critter....???
« Reply #18 on: August 24, 2006, 12:12:28 PM »
Hal,

Thank you for your reply.  I will respectfully wait for an expert to answer me!

Meanwhile... back to training!



It's mean i know it .... but damn it made me laugh.  And after all, don't ya alway's see them smiling and laughin so wouldnt they actually want me to post this... shit i know i am going to hell, but this will be one of the LAST reasons satan reads off at my sentencing hearing!
LIFE is not a race to the grave with the intention of arriving safely
in a pretty and well-preserved body, but, rather to skid in broadside,
thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming--WOW! WHAT A
RIDE!!!

Offline Dachshund

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Re: OMG what Is THIS Critter....???
« Reply #19 on: August 24, 2006, 12:44:32 PM »
....prepare to ride the short-bus through all eternity.

Satan

Offline Shawn Decker

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Re: OMG what Is THIS Critter....???
« Reply #20 on: August 24, 2006, 03:19:05 PM »
Lwood, if RAIDS makes it to Virginia I'm blaming you.  And don't I have enough to worry about with hemophilia, hepatitis, HIV, AIDS, quarter-blown AIDS, and RDS (Restless Dick Syndrome)... now I have to add RAIDS to my concerns?
Shawn


Offline jkinatl2

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Re: OMG what Is THIS Critter....???
« Reply #21 on: August 24, 2006, 03:35:26 PM »
Problem with quarter-blown AIDS is, you never get that quarter back.

Speaking of, off to finish laundry :)

"Many people, especially in the gay community, turn to oral sex as a safer alternative in the age of AIDS. And with HIV rates rising, people need to remember that oral sex is safer sex. It's a reasonable alternative."

-Kimberly Page-Shafer, PhD, MPH

Welcome Thread

Offline Ann

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Re: OMG what Is THIS Critter....???
« Reply #22 on: August 24, 2006, 04:07:21 PM »
Speaking of, off to finish laundry :)

OMG!!! Jonathan's got MAIDS!!!!
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline ACinKC

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Re: OMG what Is THIS Critter....???
« Reply #23 on: August 24, 2006, 04:13:11 PM »
OMG!!! Jonathan's got MAIDS!!!!


Pissing myself over here!  This damn thread has MADE my day!
LIFE is not a race to the grave with the intention of arriving safely
in a pretty and well-preserved body, but, rather to skid in broadside,
thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming--WOW! WHAT A
RIDE!!!

Offline Dachshund

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Re: OMG what Is THIS Critter....???
« Reply #24 on: August 24, 2006, 04:17:24 PM »
OMG!!! Jonathan's got MAIDS!!!!



Yep...and I heard he got it from Florence Johnston who worked for the Jeffersons.

[attachment deleted by admin]
« Last Edit: August 24, 2006, 04:27:41 PM by Dachshund »

Offline ACinKC

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Re: OMG what Is THIS Critter....???
« Reply #25 on: August 24, 2006, 04:23:20 PM »
Not to hijack but..........Ann if I step on that drop of blood wearing socks and shoes can I still get HIV? Huh? Can I? Can I? Can I? Huh? You sure? Can I? Huh?


Worried :-*

Ummm Dasch....This is totally you....

LIFE is not a race to the grave with the intention of arriving safely
in a pretty and well-preserved body, but, rather to skid in broadside,
thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming--WOW! WHAT A
RIDE!!!

Offline Shawn Decker

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Re: OMG what Is THIS Critter....???
« Reply #26 on: August 24, 2006, 07:52:32 PM »
Wait, if Jonathan is going to get his laundry- which he did himself- then that means one thing.... HE'S CURED OF MAIDS!
Shawn

Offline Matty the Damned

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Re: OMG what Is THIS Critter....???
« Reply #27 on: August 24, 2006, 07:59:13 PM »
This is all well and good, but is this a risk for McAIDS? And if so can I supersize it?

MtD ;D

Offline jkinatl2

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Re: OMG what Is THIS Critter....???
« Reply #28 on: August 24, 2006, 08:08:55 PM »
So if I lived on the North Pole, I could get Ice Cap AIDS? Symptoms being tight fitting spandex and the ability to throw my leg over my shoulder.

I thought ALL DAY LONG and thats the best I could come up with. I suck.

"Many people, especially in the gay community, turn to oral sex as a safer alternative in the age of AIDS. And with HIV rates rising, people need to remember that oral sex is safer sex. It's a reasonable alternative."

-Kimberly Page-Shafer, PhD, MPH

Welcome Thread

Offline Life

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Re: OMG what Is THIS Critter....???
« Reply #29 on: August 24, 2006, 09:03:37 PM »
NO no no.... Thats always has been a worry of mine... You dont suck...

[attachment deleted by admin]
« Last Edit: August 24, 2006, 11:12:13 PM by Eric »

Offline Dachshund

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Re: OMG what Is THIS Critter....???
« Reply #30 on: August 24, 2006, 10:20:36 PM »
This is all well and good, but is this a risk for McAIDS? And if so can I supersize it?

MtD ;D


Poo...that might be the creepiest thing I have ever seen!

Offline Dachshund

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Re: OMG what Is THIS Critter....???
« Reply #31 on: August 24, 2006, 10:28:48 PM »
I swear this is my last "Am I Infected" question.....but if I sleep with "Swamp Thing" will I get everglAIDS?

[attachment deleted by admin]

Offline Life

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Re: OMG what Is THIS Critter....???
« Reply #32 on: August 24, 2006, 10:44:30 PM »
Oh for sure, by the way did you ever look closely at Swamp Things "basket?"

My biggest fear !!  Going into the kitchen......  AM a WW or what?

[attachment deleted by admin]

Offline Life

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Re: OMG what Is THIS Critter....???
« Reply #33 on: August 24, 2006, 11:07:08 PM »
Last one...

The nighttime, sniffling, sneezing, coughing, aching, stuffy head, cold sweating, so you can rest medicine...

I got it coming from both directions......

[attachment deleted by admin]

Offline IzPoz

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Re: OMG what Is THIS Critter....???
« Reply #34 on: August 25, 2006, 12:01:07 AM »
LOL, I think I need to come to this forum more often...

Wait... I better watch where I tread... I can't afford to get MAIDS....
The reason angels can fly is that they take themselves so lightly. ~ Chesterton G. K.

Offline Dachshund

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Re: OMG what Is THIS Critter....???
« Reply #35 on: August 25, 2006, 07:24:12 AM »
.............envelope please. And the winner is......












[attachment deleted by admin]
« Last Edit: August 25, 2006, 07:26:46 AM by Dachshund »

Offline ACinKC

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Re: OMG what Is THIS Critter....???
« Reply #36 on: August 25, 2006, 09:46:21 AM »
Dasch.... Step AWAY from the Alligator.  You have no idea who he has been with and you should only enter into unprotected sex after you have BOTH been tested together and see each others results.  This is VERY important.
LIFE is not a race to the grave with the intention of arriving safely
in a pretty and well-preserved body, but, rather to skid in broadside,
thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming--WOW! WHAT A
RIDE!!!

Offline Dachshund

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Re: OMG what Is THIS Critter....???
« Reply #37 on: August 25, 2006, 09:51:49 AM »
Oh dear God...I think my croccondom may have torn. My wee-wee is covered with scales. Should I test?

Offline ACinKC

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Re: OMG what Is THIS Critter....???
« Reply #38 on: August 25, 2006, 09:53:33 AM »
Next time dasch try one of these...

LIFE is not a race to the grave with the intention of arriving safely
in a pretty and well-preserved body, but, rather to skid in broadside,
thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming--WOW! WHAT A
RIDE!!!

Offline jlrvinton

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Re: OMG what Is THIS Critter....???
« Reply #39 on: September 01, 2006, 06:06:39 AM »
http:// I bet its a Dog.  Coons have 4 "fingers" and a kind of "thumb.... But it could be a possum....but they tend to be very shy and  avoid humans.  Try laying a dollar bill next to the print in order to help judge its size.....  Consider leaving a "Treat"  in two locations on your deck....One up high, one on the deck.....Coons and Possums (as well as Cats) are great climbers......  Next morning, if both treats are gone, suspect the above....If only the one on the deck is gone, It's probably a dog.  Make sure your treats are stinky!     Good Luck !!

Offline Matty the Damned

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Re: OMG what Is THIS Critter....???
« Reply #40 on: September 01, 2006, 06:12:14 AM »
Well, I reckon it's a mogwai, but you never know.

Welcome to the Forums Jlrvinton. ;)

MtD

Offline jlrvinton

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Re: OMG what Is THIS Critter....???
« Reply #41 on: September 01, 2006, 06:16:05 AM »
Thanks for the Welcome MtD!

Offline Matty the Damned

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Re: OMG what Is THIS Critter....???
« Reply #42 on: September 01, 2006, 08:20:55 AM »
Matty the Damned is the Goddess of Universal Love. ;D

MtD

 


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