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Author Topic: Worried, unprotected. stupid  (Read 5098 times)

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Offline yrusoparanoid

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Worried, unprotected. stupid
« on: January 12, 2010, 12:55:32 AM »
Hi,

I was in vacation in Lima Peru, on my lastnight i ended up in this hotel room with this Peruvian woman. i didnt have protection and i never do it without but stupid as i am did. it was maybe 10 mins max and wasnt very continues as i hadnt had sex in awhile so i kept pulling out. at time wiped myself before putting it back in then pulled out, came and cleaned myself up. she wanted to go again but i didnt wanna do it again without protection so i ran a mile to get some.

i hadnt felt any symptoms till about 3 weeks later were i had abit of a muscle ache and light fever. i want to get tested but im currently in italy and im having troubles finding a clinic as my italian is limited and cant find anything in google.

1: i know i had a risk but how high risk was it 2: although i had these flu like symptoms that didnt make me bed bound 3 weeks later, are ars more hard hitting than that? 3: do you know of any clinics in Milan italy where i can get tested and a quick result?

thank you so much for your information and i know i made a stupid choice.





Offline Matty the Damned

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Re: Worried, unprotected. stupid
« Reply #1 on: January 12, 2010, 01:35:24 AM »
Symptoms (or their absence) mean nothing when it comes to diagnosing HIV. We don't discuss symptoms here as we prefer to focus on risk behaviours.

Unprotected vaginal sex does present a risk for HIV transmission, though it's not an especially high risk for the insertive partner. Therefore you should arrange to have an HIV antibody test 13 weeks after this sexual encounter. You should also be tested for other sexually transmissible infections.

I would encourage you to use latex condoms and an appropriate water based lubricant whenever you have anal or vaginal sex in the future.

Unfortunately I am not familiar with the availability of sexual health services in Italy and so I am not able to advise you in that regard. Perhaps one of our other experts will be able to assist you with that.

Please take the time to read our Welcome Thread which contains useful information about HIV transmission and testing.

MtD

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: Worried, unprotected. stupid
« Reply #2 on: January 12, 2010, 08:39:25 AM »
http://www.ministerosalute.it/hiv/paginaInternaHiv.jsp?id=198&menu=strumentieservizi

Hi,

This link contains tel. no. for Ministry of Health in Italy. Someone there should be able to direct you to where you can get an HIV test.

I agree with Matty that the odds are in your favor as the insertive partner to test negative. But you do need to learn from this experience. Low risk is not the same as no risk. If you don't have a condom with you don't have intercourse. Period.

Good luck with your test result.

Cheers. 
Andy Velez

Offline yrusoparanoid

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Re: Worried, unprotected. stupid
« Reply #3 on: January 12, 2010, 10:48:58 AM »
Thanks guys

I totally agree, i still to this day dont understand why i did it. its hard not knowing when im so paranoid, i get headaches and other things i assume are from stress.

another question , although symptoms arnt a good way to tell , its highly unlikely for symptoms to happen a month after exposer?

cheers for the link andy ill try to look it up.

Offline Ann

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Re: Worried, unprotected. stupid
« Reply #4 on: January 12, 2010, 11:21:34 AM »
Paranoid,

Not everyone who has been infected will get any symptoms at all. If they do happen, it usually happens around two weeks after infection has taken place. Symptoms, or even the lack of symptoms, will never tell you a single thing about your hiv status. Only testing at the appropriate time will.

The earliest you can test is at six weeks, as the vast majority of people who have actually been infected will seroconvert and test positive by this time. A six week negative is highly unlikely to change, but must be confirmed at the three month point.

I also expect you to test hiv negative over this one-time insertive encounter. You should also test for the other, more easily transmitted STIs as you are much more likely to have picked up one of them rather than hiv. You can test of most other STIs at around two weeks following the encounter. Syphilis shares a three month window period with hiv, and like hiv, a person who has been infected with syphilis will likely test positive for it earlier but a three month test is conclusive.

Please learn from this and make sure you are using condoms in future. No exceptions.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline yrusoparanoid

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Re: Worried, unprotected. stupid
« Reply #5 on: January 12, 2010, 12:48:54 PM »
Cheers Ann,

Much appreciated. it happened about 4 months ago, i just haven't been to my home country for for 7 months but will be back in 16 days. the link andy gave me i cant read nore it would be hard for me to explain.

i have one more question which is kinda hard for me to ask.... one night i was at a party alone. i met agroup of guys there. they told me they told they me they were all gay and i had not issues with that and partied the night away with them. but they started grabbing me and constantly insisting they can turn me gay and id make a great gay guy constantly touching me. thats when i started to get uncomfortable. My mind became a complete blank and wake up in a public toilet. looking at my watch it would have been 2 maybe 3 hours i cannot remember.

i know gay guys dont usually rape straight men but if i was anally raped would i have felt it passed out? or when i woke up would i have felt id have been raped? im not accusing just worried on how persistent they were and they knew i was alone from a different country. im embarrassed about asking this. i know you dont usually answer questions such as these but the advice would really help.

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: Worried, unprotected. stupid
« Reply #6 on: January 12, 2010, 01:26:07 PM »
If you had anal intercourse receptively you would have known it. Your butthole would be sore enough to make that evident as well as other evidence with clothing, etc. It does sound like you had too much to drink which is never a good idea. 
Andy Velez

Offline yrusoparanoid

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Re: Worried, unprotected. stupid
« Reply #7 on: January 12, 2010, 01:45:46 PM »
cheers andy.

as for clothes i dont remember if i was sitting on the toilet pants down or up. thought i was positioned that way.yeah i had a fair bit to drink, ive just never had a problem with memory while drinking and that kinda scared me assuming maybe i was spiked.

sorry to have brought this up.

Offline Ann

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Re: Worried, unprotected. stupid
« Reply #8 on: January 12, 2010, 01:51:58 PM »
Paranoid,

I think Andy was probably referring more to any discharge left in your underwear rather than what position your clothing was in. As he said, if you had been penetrated anally - especially as a person not used to that sort of activity - you most definitely would have been sore and known about it. Believe me. Yes, I know first hand. No, it wasn't rape. Still sore.

As for testing, you've waited four months, you may as well wait two more weeks until you're back home. It's very unlikely you've been infected with hiv, so why put yourself through the extra stress of testing in a country where you cannot communicate effectively? Just put this out of your mind for now and enjoy the remainder of your travels. I do fully expect you to test negative following this one time insertive incident.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline yrusoparanoid

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Re: Worried, unprotected. stupid
« Reply #9 on: January 12, 2010, 02:01:59 PM »
cheers Ann.

i was calm about it all until i found these light brown painless spots on the tip of my penis about a month after the exposer. the dock didnt know %100 what it was but mentioned it could be syphilis which made me panic. she gave me some antibiotics and some cream and told me to see if they go. about a week later they were gone even tho i didnt take more than half the antibiotics. thats why i panic

Offline Ann

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Re: Worried, unprotected. stupid
« Reply #10 on: January 12, 2010, 02:05:02 PM »
paranoid,

Brown spots on your penis have nothing to do with hiv. If you're worried about other STIs, get that checked out when you get home. Stop panicking and enjoy the rest of your trip. When you get home and find out you've been worrying over nothing, you'll kick yourself for ruining the end of your trip. Chill out.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline yrusoparanoid

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Re: Worried, unprotected. stupid
« Reply #11 on: January 12, 2010, 02:13:06 PM »
yeah i know just the risk of syphilis increasing my chances if she had it and i caught that off her if the had open sores increasing my chances of catching hiv.

cheers ann , trying to relax and enjoy my trip but with such nerves its like im about to snap at people so i always try do things alone. but your reassurance means alot to me

Offline yrusoparanoid

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Re: Worried, unprotected. stupid
« Reply #12 on: January 12, 2010, 03:33:08 PM »
oh and Ann i dont know if i was sitting on the toilet with my pants down as if i was using it. so there wouldnt be any discharge on my underwear it would have looked like i used the bathroom

sorry and someone quoted this on a a forum about someone asking about anal rape.

the person quotes

"wow, played with chloroform? are you aware that it was the "date rape" drug before rohypnol? no wonder you passed out, thats what it was used for.
and yes, it IS possible that you were taken advantage of. it is only painful if you do not prepare properly. if he used plenty of lubricant and went slowly, giving the muscles time to adjust, then there would be no pain afterwards. the big keys are lots of lube and go slow. done properly, its enjoyable and you wont feel a thing a couple after."


and i dont remember what happened for 2 hours or so , im just in the bathroom of a gas station. felt like a saw film.
« Last Edit: January 12, 2010, 03:49:57 PM by yrusoparanoid »

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: Worried, unprotected. stupid
« Reply #13 on: January 12, 2010, 04:24:01 PM »
Frankly there is nothing more we can say to you about your situation. You do need to stop surfing the web both here and elsewhere to come up with more fuel to feed your worst fears and fantasies.

In a couple of weeks you'll get tested and receive what I expect will be negative result.

During the remaining waiting time you can make yourself more comfortable by focusing on other things in your life. And don't bother saying you're too upset to do that because I can tell you that response is not going to fly here.

Ultimately I expect you to come out of this ok as far as HIV is concerned.
Andy Velez

Offline yrusoparanoid

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Re: Worried, unprotected. stupid
« Reply #14 on: January 31, 2010, 12:23:05 PM »
Quick question.

Having a body to body massage with oil and then having a bath together with a woman is no way of contracting the virus right?

Offline RapidRod

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Re: Worried, unprotected. stupid
« Reply #15 on: January 31, 2010, 12:53:26 PM »
Take the time to read the lessons on transmission. You did not have a risk in the last situation you've brought to the forum.

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: Worried, unprotected. stupid
« Reply #16 on: January 31, 2010, 03:51:20 PM »
That's right. Neither of those experiences are risks for HIV transmission.

And follow Rod's suggestion and get yourself better educated about HIV transmission by reading our lesson about it.
Andy Velez

Offline yrusoparanoid

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Re: Worried, unprotected. stupid
« Reply #17 on: February 15, 2010, 07:54:47 AM »
hey guys thanks so much for the support , you guys have always been so right and its because of you ive i have more control over my worries.

My results came clear.

i have one question that plays with my mind abit. what are the chances of a woman getting hiv from swallowing seiman ?

Offline Ann

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Re: Worried, unprotected. stupid
« Reply #18 on: February 15, 2010, 09:03:52 AM »
yrso,

Giving blowjobs is only a theoretical risk for hiv infection, whether the person giving the blowjob is a man or a woman. The mouth is a very inhospitable environment for hiv and saliva contains over a dozen different proteins and enzymes that damage hiv and render it unable to infect. Also, there are only a very few, very specific types of cells that hiv can infect and these cells are not found in abundance in the oral cavity. The only time giving blowjobs may be a concern is if the person giving the blowjob has very, very poor oral health.

Unless you're planning on giving blowjobs, I fail to see why this is of interest to you.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline yrusoparanoid

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Re: Worried, unprotected. stupid
« Reply #19 on: August 12, 2010, 07:40:53 PM »

  Help Needed , condom Broken.
« on: Today at 04:51:24 PM »   

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Hi Guys,

Back again , this time abit more calm than i usually am even tho worse circumstances.

I went to a pretty decent classed brothel in australia were i think is pretty professional where
the girls working there have a camera in the room so they can choose not to sleep with you.
were they claim there scanned every 2 weeks and blood tested every 6. its beside the point i know
just thought id give a little background on the kinda place i was at.

Anyway i had protected sex with one of the girls there and when we switch positions i inserted and felt
the condom snap. so id say it would have been exposed for maybe 3 or so inserts not even seconds. she was pretty calm about it claiming its never really happened and that i should be reassured as she was screened less than 2 weeks ago.

i wasnt too worried but about 10 days later i got a flu, then a few days later a sore throat but i woke up breathing cold air near the window. not to mention a girl i was with prior had a cold. so if you could agree with me symptoms could come as simple as that just timing was bad.

im trying to keep my cool but im just worried. one last question. if i woman swallows cum what are the chances of her catching it.
if it makes a difference i continued to have protected sex after


I'm so sorry about creating a new thread....i just didnt want to see seem asif i get worried about every single thing and just see like an over paranoid person and wouldnt be taken seriously.

I'm really sorry to Ann and the crew :(

Offline RapidRod

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Re: Worried, unprotected. stupid
« Reply #20 on: August 12, 2010, 08:04:31 PM »
Reread the reply Matty gave you in a previous situation that you had, the testing guidelines don't change.

Offline yrusoparanoid

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Re: Worried, unprotected. stupid
« Reply #21 on: August 12, 2010, 08:19:29 PM »
I dont understand?


Offline yrusoparanoid

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Re: Worried, unprotected. stupid
« Reply #22 on: August 12, 2010, 08:30:36 PM »
wait i understand now.

even tho it was like 3 strokes?

but the chances would be even more slim right?  i guess the bottom line is.... should i be worried?

Offline Matty the Damned

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Re: Worried, unprotected. stupid
« Reply #23 on: August 12, 2010, 09:03:55 PM »
wait i understand now.

even tho it was like 3 strokes?

but the chances would be even more slim right?  i guess the bottom line is.... should i be worried?

You were protected up until the condom broke. You should get a test for HIV 13 weeks, but you will almost certainly test negative. The risk here is marginal at best.

You might also ask to be tested for other more common STDs such as chlamydia and gonorrhoea.

Condoms, when used properly, rarely break. You should review your condom handling technique. Make sure you use in date quality brand latex condoms and only water based lubricants.

MtD

Offline yrusoparanoid

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Re: Worried, unprotected. stupid
« Reply #24 on: August 12, 2010, 09:34:07 PM »
Cheers heaps Matty,

Also my other question about cuming in a helthy womans mouth? is that big risk?

ive heard only if she has dental issues such as cuts. she didnt but she recently brushed her teeth before hand.

Offline RapidRod

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Re: Worried, unprotected. stupid
« Reply #25 on: August 12, 2010, 09:43:49 PM »
Not a risk at all. HIV is not transmitted by oral sex.

Offline yrusoparanoid

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Re: Worried, unprotected. stupid
« Reply #26 on: August 12, 2010, 10:05:38 PM »
I mean is it a risk to her? i know its not a risk to reciever
but the one with the cum in there mouth.

Offline RapidRod

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Re: Worried, unprotected. stupid
« Reply #27 on: August 12, 2010, 10:07:38 PM »
I mean is it a risk to her? i know its not a risk to reciever
but the one with the cum in there mouth.
No it is not a risk to her.

Offline yrusoparanoid

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Re: Worried, unprotected. stupid
« Reply #28 on: August 12, 2010, 11:39:40 PM »
Thank you so much guys,

You really do great work on this site. although i still worry you guys take a huge weight off my shoulders.

Offline yrusoparanoid

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Re: Worried, unprotected. stupid
« Reply #29 on: May 02, 2011, 10:36:36 PM »
Hi,

Quick question , i went to thailand and had a few drunken nights with a few call girls. im pretty sure my condom stayed on , there was times i got abit soft and it started to slide off. i also had unprotected oral which was pretty stupid of me.

my question is when i left thailand i fell pretty sick so about 14 days after these incounters i had a blood test and std test. nothing cam up at all.

if the symtoms i felt were from an infection of HIV would my blood test have detected it? meaning if it was ars and already attacking the body?

you guys are doing a great job and its because of you and this site ive managed to overcome many obstacles of containing my fears.

Offline Ann

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Re: Worried, unprotected. stupid
« Reply #30 on: May 03, 2011, 06:26:33 AM »
yrso,

Thank you for returning to your original thread - where you should post all your additional thoughts or questions. It helps us to help you when you keep all your additional thoughts or questions in one thread. It doesn't matter how long it has been since you last posted in your thread or if the subject matter is different.

If you need help finding your thread when you come here, click on the "Show own posts" link under your name in the left-hand column of any forum page.

Please also read through the Welcome Thread so you can familiarize yourself with our Forum Posting Guidelines. Thank you for your cooperation.





Unprotected oral is not a risk for hiv infection.

You used condoms which is the right thing to do. Condoms have been proven to prevent hiv infection. As long as the head of your penis remained covered, you did not have a risk for hiv infection. It does not matter if the condom slips down a bit. What's important is that the head is still covered.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

 


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