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Author Topic: I am 95% Sure I Am HIV Positive  (Read 27239 times)

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Offline Mylovenate

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I am 95% Sure I Am HIV Positive
« on: December 25, 2009, 02:05:38 PM »
Hello Everyone, also merry Christmas to all.

Well This is my story and recent scare. On 11/20/09 i had a high risk exp. with a girl that i had only been seeing for about 1month. Well I used condoms with this girl the few times we had sex, however on 11/19 i purchased a different brand of condoms, on 11/20 the condom broke 2 times. On both times we went from vagina to anal. i am not sure how long the condom was broken but i noticed it both times while i was cleaning myself off. i was very upset as its something i tried very hard to avoid. well since the incident on 11/27 i woke up with night sweats, and mild diarrhea. the on 11/8 i started to get a discomforting feeling on my right side by the abdomen. then on 11/30 the lymph nodes on my neck started to Flare up, the most of the week from 11/30-12/05 i had intermittent night sweats whenever i felt the lymph nodes flare up, i had chills, sweaty palms, mild diarrhea and i felt weak n fatigued and i had sore/achy muscles and joints. On 11/03 and 11/04 i had 2 separate Hiv blood test. Both came back negative obviously as i didn't know of the window period. I then went and got a DNA PCR on 12/07 which i got the results back for on 12/12 and were also negative. Since then i have experienced generalized swollen lymph nodes and what i mean by that is that i feel this small pea sized things under my skin. Pretty much everywhere on my body, my neck armpits, groin and also on my back left leg and my back by the spine and have also exp back pain. Also about 2wks after getting symptoms i noticed that my tongue was white like thrush or a hairy looking tongue and a rash on my back side on both the right and left hand side that resemble pimples n are red and i have been getting itchy skin and for the past 2 wks a dry cough so far its not a really bad cough.

i have been to the docs office several times since all this started and i have been cleared off all stds. Well the girl that i had the exp with on 11/20 went to get tested on 12/10. Results were back negative on 12/16. I went to take another Oraquick test at a clinic on 12/22 which was negative at 33 days past exp. The reason i say i am 95% positive and have even told my parents to prepare for the worst is because i find it to b a big coincidence that 1wk after the condom broke off i started to feel this way. My lymph nodes aren't getting any better either.

My questions are if i am exp. symptoms of ARS would i have seroconverted already since i have been having symptoms since 11/27. Since i took the DNA PCR test at 17 days past exp wouldn't that have shown up Positive since the test is said to b so sensitive.

I have just been so sad and depressed this whole month since the incident. i have cried and i have tried to convince myself that i have it so that when i do get a positive test result i am hoping i am more prepared for it. I am 5% percent sure i dont have it due to negative on the DNA PCR test at 17 days and also Oraquick at 33 days past exp. Also since the Girl also got a negative test back n she claims the last guy she was with be4 me was in late august so she tested at 4 month but i am not sure if i can trust her and that she didn't sleep with someone a few wks be4 getting with me on Oct 21st.

Finally I am going for my 6 wk test on 12/30 well it will be more like 41 days but i guess my main question is again if i have been exp ARS Symptoms since 11/27 wouldn't i have seroconverted by now or do i have to wait till i actually stop getting the ARS symptoms to get detectable antibodies in my system?  i know u guys say not go by by symptoms but all the other illnesses are just as scary as HIV.
Sorry for the long story but i really wanted to document my last 35 days as good as possible. Please comment back. And again merry Christmas!

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: I am 95% Sure I Am HIV Positive
« Reply #1 on: December 25, 2009, 06:05:40 PM »
Fortunately feelings aren't facts. Based on what you have reported I would say the likelihood is that you are going to test negative.

None of your symptoms are in anyway HIV-specific. You shold be discussing them with your doctor instead of playing doctor on yourself and coming up with the wrong conclusions.

Until the condoms broke you were protected. HIV is harder to transmit from female to male. Taking all together what you have reported I would say the odds are very much in your favor that you will test negative.

For future reference make sure you are using latex condoms which fit you properly and are within date of usage.

You can test at 6 weeks. You still would need to re-test at 13 weeks for a final result. However, if as I expect you test negative at 6 weeks, the very strong likelihood is that you will continue to test negative.

Cheers.
Andy Velez

Offline Mylovenate

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Re: I am 95% Sure I Am HIV Positive
« Reply #2 on: December 25, 2009, 06:40:32 PM »
thank u andy, i hope so cause i really am scared. but reading other peoples experience on this site is very comforting. thank u.

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: I am 95% Sure I Am HIV Positive
« Reply #3 on: December 25, 2009, 08:48:40 PM »
I'm glad you have found the site to be helpful.

Keep busy with other things until you test. Like I said, I expect you to come out of this ok.

Cheers.
Andy Velez

Offline Mylovenate

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generalized lymphadenopathy
« Reply #4 on: December 26, 2009, 08:28:57 PM »
this is just a question in general for any positive person to answer. i have not tested positive after 4 test yet. but like i posted prev i have alot of the symptoms related to ARS. i am most worried about my lymph nodes. i started to get tender not swollen lymph nodes on my neck as of 11/30, as of today i still have tender nodes. i feel them all over my body. i feel the, on my thighs on either side, on my neck under my throat, groin and on my tights, armpits. i have read online that this is something that affects 50-70% of all HIV positive people. ive also read that this leads to faster death in general since the lymph nodes i guess get exhausted n will no longer be able to control hiv that hides in the lymph nodes n then thats when lymphona type cancer set in. i guess i wanted to know if anyone has exp this issue while seroconverting and if it went away with treatment. Andy was the only one that reply to my last post and i would appreciate more replies on this one. again i have test positive but i have test negative at 10-14 days which is inconclusive, i had 1 negative dna pcr at 18 days, also had the girl tested and she came back negative n states her last partner was be4 me was 4 monts ago, but i dont trust her. also i got another negative at 33 days this time i took a ora quick test, just for reference and risk info my lymph nodes issue started 10 days past the date 2 condoms broke while have anal n vaginal sex. i will be going in for my 6wk test and i am looking forward to a negative result.

Offline Mylovenate

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Re: generalized lymphadenopathy
« Reply #5 on: December 26, 2009, 08:31:32 PM »
sorry to correct myself i haven't tested positive, one the post somewhere i but that i did test positive. sorry for the confusion.

Offline RapidRod

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Re: generalized lymphadenopathy
« Reply #6 on: December 26, 2009, 08:34:09 PM »
Return to your original thread where you should keep all your questions and concerns. Take the time to read the posting guidelines found in the "Welcome" thread.

Offline Mylovenate

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Re: generalized lymphadenopathy
« Reply #7 on: December 26, 2009, 08:36:04 PM »
well this is a differnt question than the one i posted yesterday. but i guess how do i get this transf to my other post?

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: I am 95% Sure I Am HIV Positive
« Reply #8 on: December 26, 2009, 10:04:00 PM »
I've merged your threads. Please follow our rule and keep all of your entries in this same thread.

Neither the presence nor the absence of symptoms will ever tell you anything accurately about your HIV status. Only an HIV test taken at the proper time can give you that answer. Everything else is guessing and speculation. Swollen lymph nodes are NOT an HIV specific occurence. If you have them, leave them alone and discuss the problem with your doctor.

Nothing has changed our evaluation of your situation. You simply have to wait until you can test for a reliable result.
Andy Velez

Offline Mylovenate

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Re: I am 95% Sure I Am HIV Positive
« Reply #9 on: December 26, 2009, 10:19:46 PM »
thanks andy but i guess i wanted to know more about the GLP, i guess just in general. i have read up on it n the info was kind of scary, i guess my questions are is GLP info online true, that most hiv posiitive people that get this are in the 50-70% of infected. and that there is a higher morality rate for this condition? i dont know if anyone knows anything about this condition.

Offline Ann

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Re: I am 95% Sure I Am HIV Positive
« Reply #10 on: December 26, 2009, 10:26:10 PM »
My,

The average time to seroconversion is only 22 days. And most people will show a viral load on the PCR tests by two weeks. I don't expect your negative results to change.

You need to know that ANYONE can get generalised lymph swelling and it can be caused by quite a few different factors. In your case, it's highly unlikely to be hiv. I've never seen the insertive partner (that's you) end up hiv positive following a condom break and I don't expect you to be the first.

If you're worried about your lymph glands, see your doctor - you could be missing something important by insisting it has to be hiv. We don't discuss symptoms here in any detail.

Ann
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"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline Mylovenate

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Re: I am 95% Sure I Am HIV Positive
« Reply #11 on: December 26, 2009, 10:46:15 PM »
thank u ann. i guess i was just so scared due to how all the sudden my lymph nodes started to b tender n palpable a week after my exp. i find it to be to much of a coincedence, but again i am hoping that everything come out good and i wil test for my 6wk on wednesday. then go for 8wk then 10 wk and then 13 wks. i just cannot believe that we have come so far on hiv treatment but overall we are so behind on a reliable and approved early detection test, i know we did our own deeds and got ourselves into trouble by doing the things we do. but come on, how are we supposed to wait 3 months to test. people say thing of other stuff, and do other things, but since all this started on 11/27 i have been to the docs office, i have been drained from blood 6x and i have had nothing but stress and depression throught the holidays, i know that is no ones problems and i wil take full responsibility for my actions, i guess in the end knowing i didnt infect someone and i was the one that got it from someone is better because i wouldnt be able to live with myself knowing that i infected someone. but yes that is what my life has been like for the past month.

Offline Mylovenate

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Re: I am 95% Sure I Am HIV Positive
« Reply #12 on: December 26, 2009, 10:48:53 PM »
oh and by the way ann, i had the DNA PCR n not the RNA PCR. i know they say that its known for false positives but i got a negative result, blood test done on 12/07 n results provided on 12/12 which was bout 18 days past exp.

Offline RapidRod

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Re: I am 95% Sure I Am HIV Positive
« Reply #13 on: December 26, 2009, 11:03:09 PM »
PCR-DNA tests are not diagnostic tests. You wasted your money.

Offline Mylovenate

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Re: I am 95% Sure I Am HIV Positive
« Reply #14 on: December 26, 2009, 11:33:09 PM »
u are so negative teak. ive read the DNA PCR is meant to detect the hiv gene in the dna of the cell, n that is so sensative that it even small amount of other virus wil make it give a false positive result, so a negative at 18 days should b a good sign. i know u always say to follow up with elisa or another fda approved test so i will at the 6wk mark. as well as the 8wk, 10wk n finally 13wk,

Offline RapidRod

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Re: I am 95% Sure I Am HIV Positive
« Reply #15 on: December 27, 2009, 08:26:13 AM »
Well aztekcasper, facts are facts..

Offline Ann

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Re: I am 95% Sure I Am HIV Positive
« Reply #16 on: December 27, 2009, 08:40:02 AM »
My,

It's true that the DNA test is NOT approved for diagnostic purposes. The RNA test is sometimes used when there has been a high risk, but you did not have a high risk. You had a very low risk. You still need a conclusive three month negative antibody test, but PCR testing for you is a waste of medical personnel's time and resources and your money. 

The symptoms that some, but not all people experience during primary hiv infection are not actually caused by the virus itself. They are caused by the process the body goes through while producing antibodies. So yes, if your symptoms had anything to do with hiv infection, you would have tested positive - or at the very least indeterminate - at 33 days.

I do NOT expect your negative results to change.

You need to get productively busy and stay off hiv internet websites while you wait for the correct time to get a conclusive result.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

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"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline Mylovenate

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Re: I am 95% Sure I Am HIV Positive
« Reply #17 on: December 30, 2009, 06:07:04 PM »
Ok so i went to get tested at a rapid hiv place on 12/28 which was about 39 days past exp or about 5 1/2wks after exp. Anywho i was surprised at how fast the results were available n the fact the test took only 10-15 min to get the results. i had a very cool n positive counselor call me into a room n ask me why i thought i was positive and i told him my ordeal for the last 5 1/2wks. he then looked at me n said well u dont have hiv. he said he had already gotten the results n they were negative. he states that the only reason people say to test at 3-6 month mark is due to gov guidelines but that new test are able to detect the presence of the antibodies even in small amounts way earlier than current window periods. i told him that i was still kind of concerned about hiv and he said that at the time my blood was drawn that there was 2 samples taken, and that was because they offer a free NAAT test. i guess a NAAT test is similar to that of RNA PCR and uses viral load to detect. but he says he is so sure that i don't have it that he even put up a bet against me having it. i wont get into details of the bet. either way all the negatives that i have been getting during this period since the incident that i have been considering to be my seroconversion period as of 11/27. i still have palpable (i think that's how its spelled) lymph nodes around certain places in my body. Sometimes i feel like maybe i don't have hiv but a whole new sexually transmitted disease that no one knows about yet. Hey it happened with HIV right? Well again i will cont updating as i place to test every week at least once a week till the 3 wk period. and i am a little scared about the results for the NAAT since the counselor said it will take 2wks to get the results back from the lab. I hope they continue to b negative as this last one was. Again thanks to Ann, Andy and yes even RapidRod for ur replies regardless of the outcome all of u deserve a hug for making it a part of ur busy days to answer our complicated and sometimes annoying questions.

Offline RapidRod

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Re: I am 95% Sure I Am HIV Positive
« Reply #18 on: December 30, 2009, 06:44:47 PM »
NAT is a PCR-RNA test and is not a stand alone tests.  3 months post exposure is when you can obtain a conclusive negative test result. APTIMA HIV-1 RNA Qualitative Assay
Indication: Qualitative detection of human immunodeficiency virus type 1 (HIV-1) in human plasma. It is intended for use as an aid in diagnosis of HIV-1 infection, including acute or primary infection.

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: I am 95% Sure I Am HIV Positive
« Reply #19 on: December 30, 2009, 07:34:39 PM »
I have to wonder how much you are really listening to anything said to you here. The bottom line is that you are very likely to continue to test negative. But because you had a low level risk you do need to re-test at 13 weeks to confirm your negative result.
Andy Velez

Offline Mylovenate

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Re: I am 95% Sure I Am HIV Positive
« Reply #20 on: December 30, 2009, 09:43:07 PM »
i am totally listening to what u (andy) and other here have said. seriously i look forward to ur replies. but anxiety kills and believe it or not. i have this feeling that every week that passes by n the closer i get to 13 wks the more sure i will continue to test negative. but believe me i do listen to what u have said. all i was doing was updating my post on most recent test results. but thank u an rapidrod for the reply.

Offline Ann

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Re: I am 95% Sure I Am HIV Positive
« Reply #21 on: December 31, 2009, 06:37:22 AM »
My,

You say you plan to test once a week for the remainder of the window period, but that is a huge waste of the clinic's time and resources and your money. Don't think you'll be allowed to come here after each test to tell us you tested negative again - because that's what will happen - and you'll also get a time out.

You need to relax and only test at the three month point to confirm your negative. Stop over-testing.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

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"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline Mylovenate

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Re: I am 95% Sure I Am HIV Positive
« Reply #22 on: January 01, 2010, 02:43:02 PM »
ANN

you obviously made a very valid point. after reading ur reply i can honestly say that i overreacted to me saying that i would test every week. honestly i which i could say that i wont be testing anymore and that the last test was good enough to last me a life time but its not. But just like i got tested on day 39 i plan to test at either the 8th week that is pending the results of the recent NAAT test done when i last tested it. it that comes back negative as i am hoping it does than no more test till 13th wk.

Now let me ask u a question in general regarding this whole thing. and this is for anyone that has tested positive. when someone says swollen lymph nodes are they literally saying there were bigger than normal or were they just tender and palpable n under the skin. i have spoken to several people regarding this. i have been exp generalized lymph noides but i dont feel them swelling up, but i do feel them none the less. that is one of the more persistant symptoms i have been exp since after my exp. Also off and on diarreah. Now lets say for example i already had a weak immune system as i usually get sick from my stomach when eating certain foods. not like throwing up or anything but loose stool. so lets say i have been having that condition. would that delay my immune system from making antibodies to b detected. Also this rash that people get i read ann said it is under the skin, i started a rash about 2 wks after my symptoms started. they kind of look like red pimples and sometimes if feels like a sunburn and also a slight itch. i just know that i have HIV and am not yet detectable after 39 days of feeling symptoms. And again i know alot of people put up post about low risk exp. I will b honest and say that i did have a high risk exp. i had sex with a girl that i didnt even know that well and the condom broke 2 times on the same night while going from anal to vaginal sex, so yes that is very high risk. i also know u guys aint doctors but have alot of exp and have heard or seen hiv infected indv. I know at some point in the next month i will b diagnosed and then all the symptoms i am exp will make sense. Sucks that i feel this way but only one knows what they are feeling inside. Again I am sorry for all the questions but this anxiety sucks. Again sorry for all the questions.

Offline Ann

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Re: I am 95% Sure I Am HIV Positive
« Reply #23 on: January 01, 2010, 03:12:44 PM »
My,

You're WRONG. You did not have a high risk, you had a low risk and I've already told you this.

Show your lymph nodes to your doctor. They can vary from person to person and we don't discuss them here.

Your rash sounds NOTHING like the rash that sometimes accompanies ARS.

I do not expect your negative results to change.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline Mylovenate

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Re: I am 95% Sure I Am HIV Positive
« Reply #24 on: January 04, 2010, 05:39:28 PM »
hi ann,

hey i noticed that on someone elses post u stated that u have yet to see someones 6wk negative change to positive by the time that they tested at 13wks. And that made me more confident of my current status. How long have u been doing this if i may? I guess the reason i am asking is because aside from Andy u are someone that i truly look forward so seeing a reply from. thanks for u help and hope to hear back from u or andy.

Offline Ann

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Re: I am 95% Sure I Am HIV Positive
« Reply #25 on: January 05, 2010, 06:56:06 AM »
My,

I've been doing this for nearly nine years - been a member here since 2001.

(how time flies - I can't believe it's 2010!)

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline Mylovenate

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Re: I am 95% Sure I Am HIV Positive
« Reply #26 on: January 05, 2010, 12:49:38 PM »
thanx for the reply ann, honestly u make me feel at peace with myself. Even if i do get test positive i will be just as dedicated as u are to providing others with the info they need to stay informed about this disease. I have decided to commit to doing some type of counseling with either youth or even just friends to educate them on this topic. But well see what happens. thanks ANN.

Offline Mylovenate

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Re: I am 95% Sure I Am HIV Positive
« Reply #27 on: January 06, 2010, 08:49:09 PM »
Ann and Andy,

Please don't be upset at me. I know Ann suggested that i stop taking test as often as i have been. Well 1st off i am still awaiting the results of the NAAT test i took on 12/28. Pretty much i was adv that if i get a call from the clinic that there was an issue with the results. So I start to freak out whenever my cell rings. And i have till 1/14 to wait. So today i had a doctors appointment and they offer a free HIV testing. I had already told the lady there 2 wks ago that i would b stopping by to take another oraquick test. So when she saw me waiting in the waiting room for my appt. she offered to take another test. So i did. Came back negative at the 48day with would b 1 day shy of week 7. So anywho i have a few questions. I know that u and Andy are not docs but hear me out and i hope that u can provide some good info as u usually do.

1. What are the odds that i was infected with HIV but its hiding in my lymph nodes and my immune system never had a chance to create antibodies or at least hasn't had the chance to create them at the 6-7wk mark. (how long after hiv enters ur body does it take for it to enter the blood stream and start infecting the cells. the reason i say that HIV is hiding in my lymph nodes is because i have generalized lymph nodes all over my body, and i mean all over. the neck, throat, my back spine, armpits, abdomen, groin, thighs, waist, and on the back of my knees and back of my arms by my elbows. The lymph nodes started 10 days after risky exp.


2. What if my immune system was to weak to even fight off HIV infection and it pretty much has taken over my body. As i have a rash on my back that has been there for more than 3wks, fatigue, joint pains, diarrhea, tender genrealized lymph nodes. Wouldn't that delay the antibody process while seroconverting. i just know that i have HIV but it just hasn't been detected as of yet. Even with all my symptoms and it being 43 days since i started to feel the symptoms. I know that you will probably get annoyed as even i get annoyed reading some of the post people put on here with there issues so i would understand you telling me something negative. But please understand i am putting 2 n2 togethere, Risky incident 11/20, showing symptoms 11/27 and symptoms are still present.

thank u. And as always i appreciate ur replies.

Offline Ann

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Re: I am 95% Sure I Am HIV Positive
« Reply #28 on: January 07, 2010, 08:09:16 AM »
My,

1. No chance. It just doesn't work that way. If you were infected, you'd be producing antibodies by now.

2. If your immune system were that weak, you'd know it by now. In other words, you would have been very ill and in hospital.

I do not expect your 48 day negative to change.

Keep up with the constant posting and you'll be given a time out. Whatever is going on with you has nothing to do with hiv.

Ann
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"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline Mylovenate

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Re: I am 95% Sure I Am HIV Positive
« Reply #29 on: January 10, 2010, 07:22:34 AM »
I am sorry for the personal message but i dont want to get a time out for posting a new test result. In a prev post i mentioned that i have taken a rapid hiv blood test and was negative at the 38-39 day after exp. that same day the clinic offered a NAAT test. Well obviously i accepted and they stated results by 01/14, well i call yesterday and asked for the results n the guy couldnt give especific results over the phone but said i would be very happy with the results. ok. Now that test was done 12/28 results provided on 01/08. As i last posted on 01/06 i had an oraquick test n was negative. So all these negative are good and all, but i still have all the text book symptoms, rash, lymphadenopathy, weight loss, ongoing flu like symptoms, thrush, oral abscess. i know it sounds crazy but i feel like at some point in the next test either the 8wk or 10wk or 13 wk wil show positive due to either my body not yet creating antibodies or when the NAAT test was done my VL was already reduced to undetectable levels. But i guess and tell me if i am wrong if i was still seroconverting my viral load shud still be somewhat high enough to detect thru NAAT. So since i know u guys here say that is not an approved dianogstics test that if would have to be followed up by a approved test such as the oraquick i took 1wk later. I am sorry for all the questions n for bothering u. But ur answers are the only comfort i had been able to get during the last 50 days. i pary for ur reply. thank u.

Offline Matty the Damned

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Re: I am 95% Sure I Am HIV Positive
« Reply #30 on: January 10, 2010, 07:27:50 AM »
Like Andy and Ann I do not expect your 48 test result to change. You should expect that your test result will be negative.

Your focus on symptoms is a form of "confirmation bias". You believe that you have contracted HIV and so you find the "symptoms" that you expect to find irrespective the reality of the situation. Your plight is typical of a class of people we refer to as "worried wells".

If you are experiencing anxiety I would encourage you to find a therapist or counsellor with whom you can discuss your fears. We are not able to provide that kind of support in this forum.

MtD

Offline Mylovenate

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Re: I am 95% Sure I Am HIV Positive
« Reply #31 on: January 18, 2010, 01:13:16 PM »
Hi Ann, Andy, Matt.

Its me again here with another question that I have been thinking about for the past few weeks. So while both my physical and mental health have been improving to some extent, I still find myself worried about the same issue. As of now I am currently on the 8th week past exposure and I went to get tested at a free clinic since I have been spending so much money taking different test. Well anyway they did a rapid blood test (Unigold) and it came back negative. So that gave me a bit more peace of mind. Well then the nurse there, which by the way was very knowledgeable did me a physical and also talked to me about hiv. She then mentioned that they are also sending my blood into the lab to get a NAAT test done. I wasn’t aware that they would do that as I have a recent NAAT test done at 5½ weeks past exposure come back negative 10 days later. Well now I have to wait again and now think what if the 1st test missed something that this one will now pick up. Another 10 days of avoiding my cell phone.

 
Well here is my issue now. I know a lot of people report fevers and soared throat as ARS symptoms in most cases. Well while this last time I did experience some flu like symptoms especially swollen lymph nodes, headaches, body aches, fatigue. I recall that last year I got into a short relationship with a person that was older than me, I was 27 at the time and she was 40. Well I know age doesn’t have much to do with anything but experience. Well I hated myself while on that relationship because right of the back we didn’t use protection due to her climbing on me right from the 1st time we tried it. I am not blaming her but I feel that said a lot about her. She was also known to be a flirt and very promiscuous. So we got together in Feb of 2009 and probably around March I did get some really bad flu like symptoms that would last a few days and them come back on and off till about May. My dad said it could have been the crazy Chicago weather changes. Well now I sit and think was that me seroconverting at that time. But since we last had sex in April of 2009 and again it was always unprotected. Obviously I am guessing the current test that I have been taking since Dec of 2009 would have show something by now since its been about 8 months. Now my question is from the point that anti-bodies are made by our bodies. How long will the antibodies show up? Do they disappear after a period of time? I hate that these disease isn’t as easy to detect as other virus where its either you have it or you don’t. Another question I have is were you guys mention immune suppressed individuals taking longer to seroconvert, maybe 3 months or upto 6months as I recall. Well lets say for example I have always suffered from stomach issues. Where there are certain foods I cannot eat (greasy food, uncooked meats, diary products) I would still eat them and get loose stools very often, actually more often than not. Would that make my immune system weak over time since I have been experiencing this for over 10yrs now. Well I hope u guys can answer. And sorry for making it so long and so many questions. I know u guys are very busy. Take care.
« Last Edit: January 18, 2010, 01:27:04 PM by Mylovenate »

Offline Ann

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Re: I am 95% Sure I Am HIV Positive
« Reply #32 on: January 18, 2010, 01:55:02 PM »
My,

We've been over and over and over this with you! Go back and re-read your entire thread - we've already answered most of your latest questions already. You were told that your 48 day negative was highly unlikely to change - what makes you think it wouldn't pick up an hiv infection from eight months ago? I've also already answered your question about your immune system.

I've also already told you that the average time to seroconversion is only 22 days. Once positive, a person will always test positive on the antibody tests.

I'm giving you that time out you've been warned about. Do not attempt to create a new account to get around  your time out because if you do, you will be permanently banned.

Ann

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"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline johnny2009

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Re: I am 95% Sure I Am HIV Positive
« Reply #33 on: January 18, 2010, 02:05:48 PM »
Hi Mylovenate,
In your first posts, you stated that you would get abdominal pain/ liver pain.  How long after the incident did you first notice it, and how long thereafter did the liver pain/tenderness persist.  Did your doctor give you any explanation as to why you maybe suffering from the abdominal pain?......

Offline RapidRod

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Re: I am 95% Sure I Am HIV Positive
« Reply #34 on: January 18, 2010, 02:14:11 PM »
Hi Mylovenate,
In your first posts, you stated that you would get abdominal pain/ liver pain.  How long after the incident did you first notice it, and how long thereafter did the liver pain/tenderness persist.  Did your doctor give you any explanation as to why you maybe suffering from the abdominal pain?......
READ THE POSTING GUIDELINES AND DO NOT POST IN OTHER PEOPLE'S THREADS.

Offline Mylovenate

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Re: I am 95% Sure I Am HIV Positive
« Reply #35 on: February 20, 2010, 09:19:54 PM »
Hello Again Everyone,

I am a little scared to post here, fearing i might get timed out or banned for no particular reason again! I want to say how even without being able to post here i still enjoyed the site, either just reading the important reports on aidsmeds or browsing other post.
I am posting here again because of my uneasy feeling that I am currently exp. I recently started seeing an HIV specialist and as Rapid Rod already knows i have been told I dont have HIV due to a negative Elisa hiv 1/2 AB @ 11 1/2wks, clearview finger prick negative @ 12wks and also a recent RNA PCR undetactible. All sounds great for anyone that would be worried of having HIV and having tested negative up to the 12wk period.
So I am posting because I believe that regardless of the test results I am infected with hiv. I am still experiencing all the ARS symptoms as before but I am most concerned about the Lymphadenopathy I am exp. from head to knees. I know that you guys might say, that lymphadenopathy can be caused by other disease. And your right but none of them are very rare forms of cancer in most cases. Now I recently was advised that I had high levels of CMV in my blood. Well while CMV is common in most people, it only causes symptoms on people with weak immune systems and CMV doesn’t cause lymphadenopathy or even thrush. I guess I am posting this here because I know that currently HIV is currently in my lymph nodes and may not have produced antibodies due to my immune system. I was hoping my RNA PCR test would detect a viral load since I know that during the 1st 3 months the viral load should be high on most people. Since I was undetected and I used the ultrasensitive @ 48 copies and previously had 2 NAAT test done at 5 and 7wks. I am starting to believe that my strain is not detectible by this type of test. I did read a report on thebody.com about a B-clad strain of hiv that was not detectible using a RNA PCR, instead a bDNA PCR had to be used. I am starting to thing I may have rare strain. I know I should be happy with all these negative results @ 12wk but its different to test negative with no symptoms than to test negative with ARS symptoms and as far as the lymphadenopathy that is a common ARS symptom and it usually last 3 months or more with early HIV infection.  Would you recommend I test up 6 months. Should I have a biopsy on my lymph nodes? I am pretty much accepting the fact and not trying to fool myself by thinking everything is ok.

Offline Matty the Damned

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Re: I am 95% Sure I Am HIV Positive
« Reply #36 on: February 20, 2010, 09:27:29 PM »
Hello Again Everyone,

I am a little scared to post here, fearing i might get timed out or banned for no particular reason again! I want to say how even without being able to post here i still enjoyed the site, either just reading the important reports on aidsmeds or browsing other post.
I am posting here again because of my uneasy feeling that I am currently exp. I recently started seeing an HIV specialist and as Rapid Rod already knows i have been told I dont have HIV due to a negative Elisa hiv 1/2 AB @ 11 1/2wks, clearview finger prick negative @ 12wks and also a recent RNA PCR undetactible. All sounds great for anyone that would be worried of having HIV and having tested negative up to the 12wk period.
So I am posting because I believe that regardless of the test results I am infected with hiv. I am still experiencing all the ARS symptoms as before but I am most concerned about the Lymphadenopathy I am exp. from head to knees. I know that you guys might say, that lymphadenopathy can be caused by other disease. And your right but none of them are very rare forms of cancer in most cases. Now I recently was advised that I had high levels of CMV in my blood. Well while CMV is common in most people, it only causes symptoms on people with weak immune systems and CMV doesn’t cause lymphadenopathy or even thrush. I guess I am posting this here because I know that currently HIV is currently in my lymph nodes and may not have produced antibodies due to my immune system. I was hoping my RNA PCR test would detect a viral load since I know that during the 1st 3 months the viral load should be high on most people. Since I was undetected and I used the ultrasensitive @ 48 copies and previously had 2 NAAT test done at 5 and 7wks. I am starting to believe that my strain is not detectible by this type of test. I did read a report on thebody.com about a B-clad strain of hiv that was not detectible using a RNA PCR, instead a bDNA PCR had to be used. I am starting to thing I may have rare strain. I know I should be happy with all these negative results @ 12wk but its different to test negative with no symptoms than to test negative with ARS symptoms and as far as the lymphadenopathy that is a common ARS symptom and it usually last 3 months or more with early HIV infection.  Would you recommend I test up 6 months. Should I have a biopsy on my lymph nodes? I am pretty much accepting the fact and not trying to fool myself by thinking everything is ok.


You obviously have some serious problems, but HIV is not one of them. The problems that you do have are beyond the scope of this forum.

I do not intend to indulge you any further by answering your questions. It is a waste of my time and will not do you any good in the long run. I will, however, be bringing your latest post to the attention of the Moderators.

I encourage you to seek the services of a mental health professional.

MtD

Offline Ann

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Re: I am 95% Sure I Am HIV Positive
« Reply #37 on: February 21, 2010, 06:27:24 AM »
My,

Instead of going to a specialist for an illness that you do NOT have, I suggest you go to a general doctor to find out what, if anything, is actually going on with you. You have more than conclusively ruled hiv out of the picture.

You aren't the first and unfortunately, you probably won't be the last person to come here and completely disbelieve their negative hiv results, while believing negative test results to rule other illness out. This is completely irrational.

We cannot help you with this irrational thinking here. You need to start seeing a mental health therapist who can help you come to terms with the fact that you do not have hiv.

I'm giving you a second time out. As before, do not attempt to create a new account to get around your time out because if you do, you will be permanently banned.

Ann
« Last Edit: February 21, 2010, 06:29:02 AM by Ann »
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"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline Mylovenate

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Re: I am 95% Sure I Am HIV Positive
« Reply #38 on: July 20, 2010, 09:08:50 PM »
Ann, Andy, even RapidRod,


I hope this post will not get me banned, again. As I am only updating for use to other people that may be experiencing a similar issue, which from reading several post on different HIV site I see is something that happens more often than not. So just an update as of my last exposure/testing. I have recently tested negative out to a bit over 8 months. I had been seeing a shrink as recommended by dr. Bob of the body.com and some of my HIV docs. I have tried to move on with my life and even considered dating again. It's been 8 very long months of no sexual contact with another girl. However my symptoms still persist. I am still experiencing Progessive Generalized Lymphadenopathy, also I am getting constant muscle twitching and gingivitis. It's hard to move away from thinking you have a disease when a major symptom of that disease is present past 8 months. I have tried moving on with life, I went back to work, have started to workout again. But everytime I feel the swollen nodes I remind myself that it's HIV. Everywhere you check online it states that undiagnosed lymphadenopathy after a risky exposure Is always HIV. And before you ask, I have been tested for all other stds and other illness. Everything has turned out fine. Now while I try to keep sane by telling myself to remember how not only have I tested negative for HIV out to 8 months but the girl that I had the exposure with tested negative 8wks into ur relationship. I have not talked to her since so i wouldn't know if her status changed for her 8wk test she took back in mid December.

Point of me updating this post is to tell the truth as far as what I believe. I am pretty positive that I am neither infected with HIV 1,2,O strains as I have taken various test to detect antibodies for those strains. But what about all the other HIV strains that are currently out here and not yet identified? I know you will all consider that possibility to be too far fetched but let's be honest, HIV started as 1 virus 30 yrs ago. Since then it has mutated so much that we curently have about 20 different known strains. But can we honestly say no other strains have been detected so far. And the odds are a new strain if found will originate in the U.S. As we have one of the highest infected population only beaten by that of Africa. Now I have stayed in contact with several other people that are experiencing lymphadenopathy after a risky exposure and they also have tested beyond the 3 month mark and have remained negative. So something has to give. I'm not questioning the current guidelines of 12wks or 13wks to be conclusive. I completely believe that the majority will test poz by then. But I am also a believer now that there is something else out there that is either on the same level as HIV or just a different strain.

My last cd4 shows cd4- 1003 cd4% 38, cd8- 733 cd8%28, cd4/cd8 ratio 1.37

As you can see my ratio is close to being inverted which is a classic cause of HIV infection. My prev cd4/cd8 ratio 1 month prior to this one was 1.50.

Again I'm just updating my experience and I hope everyone understands that I am not trying to scare anyone but simply trying to alert that something is out there. Keep safe and healthy.











Offline RapidRod

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Re: I am 95% Sure I Am HIV Positive
« Reply #39 on: July 20, 2010, 09:13:17 PM »
You don't have HIV. Move along.

Offline Matty the Damned

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Re: I am 95% Sure I Am HIV Positive
« Reply #40 on: July 20, 2010, 09:15:38 PM »
Ann, Andy, even RapidRod,


I hope this post will not get me banned, again. As I am only updating for use to other people that may be experiencing a similar issue, which from reading several post on different HIV site I see is something that happens more often than not. So just an update as of my last exposure/testing. I have recently tested negative out to a bit over 8 months. I had been seeing a shrink as recommended by dr. Bob of the body.com and some of my HIV docs. I have tried to move on with my life and even considered dating again. It's been 8 very long months of no sexual contact with another girl. However my symptoms still persist. I am still experiencing Progessive Generalized Lymphadenopathy, also I am getting constant muscle twitching and gingivitis. It's hard to move away from thinking you have a disease when a major symptom of that disease is present past 8 months. I have tried moving on with life, I went back to work, have started to workout again. But everytime I feel the swollen nodes I remind myself that it's HIV. Everywhere you check online it states that undiagnosed lymphadenopathy after a risky exposure Is always HIV. And before you ask, I have been tested for all other stds and other illness. Everything has turned out fine. Now while I try to keep sane by telling myself to remember how not only have I tested negative for HIV out to 8 months but the girl that I had the exposure with tested negative 8wks into ur relationship. I have not talked to her since so i wouldn't know if her status changed for her 8wk test she took back in mid December.

Point of me updating this post is to tell the truth as far as what I believe. I am pretty positive that I am neither infected with HIV 1,2,O strains as I have taken various test to detect antibodies for those strains. But what about all the other HIV strains that are currently out here and not yet identified? I know you will all consider that possibility to be too far fetched but let's be honest, HIV started as 1 virus 30 yrs ago. Since then it has mutated so much that we curently have about 20 different known strains. But can we honestly say no other strains have been detected so far. And the odds are a new strain if found will originate in the U.S. As we have one of the highest infected population only beaten by that of Africa. Now I have stayed in contact with several other people that are experiencing lymphadenopathy after a risky exposure and they also have tested beyond the 3 month mark and have remained negative. So something has to give. I'm not questioning the current guidelines of 12wks or 13wks to be conclusive. I completely believe that the majority will test poz by then. But I am also a believer now that there is something else out there that is either on the same level as HIV or just a different strain.

My last cd4 shows cd4- 1003 cd4% 38, cd8- 733 cd8%28, cd4/cd8 ratio 1.37

As you can see my ratio is close to being inverted which is a classic cause of HIV infection. My prev cd4/cd8 ratio 1 month prior to this one was 1.50.

Again I'm just updating my experience and I hope everyone understands that I am not trying to scare anyone but simply trying to alert that something is out there. Keep safe and healthy.

You really need some help. I mean serious mental help.

Your CD4 counts are perfectly normal. The absolute counts, the percentages and the ratio. All are what we would expect to see in an HIV NEGATIVE INDIVIDUAL.

Which is what you are, HIV negative.

I'm referring your latest post to the Moderators for review.

MtD

Offline Tim Horn

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Re: I am 95% Sure I Am HIV Positive
« Reply #41 on: July 20, 2010, 09:29:15 PM »
Mylovenate:

Well, it's safe to say that your time in the forums must come to an end. Despite repeated efforts to get you to focus on what may be wrong with you -- me thinks serious counseling is what you need -- and not what you don't need, you're back with a message of viral apocalypse.

Best of luck to you as you sort out these issues... elsewhere.

Tim Horn

 


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