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Author Topic: How safe is Oral Sex for the insertive partner?  (Read 7704 times)

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Offline worried79

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How safe is Oral Sex for the insertive partner?
« on: November 29, 2009, 01:26:49 AM »
Hello

This is my first time posting. Recently about thee and a half weeks ago I allowed a female friend of mine to perform unprotected oral sex on me, a male. I have known her for at least three years and for the most part I trust that she is HIV-.The oral sex lasted about 10 minutes during which time I was fingering the inside of her vagina. I did not have any recent injuries to my hands.

I had previously read on the internet that oral sex was considered safe against HIV for the male insertive partner but in doing further research I found cases of HIV linked to Oral Sex in several studies. I also found studies done in Spain and San Fransisco that showed no HIV link to Oral Sex over numerous years. On one site it stated researchers had proven that the cousin of Hiv in Primates could be spread by oral contact. They stated they had taken the HIV or its cousin virus and inserted it onto the tongues of uninfected primates and that the chimps would then later test positive as a result of their ex poser.

I was not worried at first about the oral sex but after getting some diarrhea and a cold with a runny and stuffy nose three weeks after the contact I began to worry. I also have had some pain and discomfort in my groin on the right side but no visable swelling of the glands since about two weeks after the incident. I have read other postings on this for Forums from individuals who claim they have been infected with HIV via oral sex

Should I be worried?


Offline RapidRod

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Re: How safe is Oral Sex for the insertive partner?
« Reply #1 on: November 29, 2009, 03:07:46 AM »
You didn't have a risk of contracting HIV but STDs can be transmitted by oral sex.

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: How safe is Oral Sex for the insertive partner?
« Reply #2 on: November 29, 2009, 07:35:18 AM »
In the entire history of the HIV epidemic there has never been a confirmed case of transmission to a guy through his receiving oral. It's safe to say you won't make history by becoming the first.

You are worrying needlessly. If your symptoms continue you should discuss them with your doctor. They have nothing to do with HIV.

Cheers.
Andy Velez

Offline worried79

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Re: How safe is Oral Sex for the insertive partner?
« Reply #3 on: November 29, 2009, 08:22:01 AM »
Thank you both for the replies, but this morning I woke up with what I believe is a swollen lymph node behind my right ear about an inch back and just slightly down from the jawbone. It is obvious to the sight and the skin above it is red. Why do all these symptoms have to appear after an incident. Makes a guy worry.

Offline Ann

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Re: How safe is Oral Sex for the insertive partner?
« Reply #4 on: November 29, 2009, 09:38:14 AM »
Worried,

If you feel unwell, see a doctor. Whatever is going on has nothing to do with hiv. Not one person has ever been infected through getting blown and you won't be the first. Not only is saliva not infectious, but it also contains over a dozen different proteins and enzymes that damage hiv and render it unable to infect.

Here's what you need to know in order to remain hiv negative:

You need to be using condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, every time, no exceptions until such time as you are in a securely monogamous relationship where you have both tested for ALL sexually transmitted infections together. To agree to have unprotected intercourse is to consent to the possibility of being infected with an STI. Sex without a condom lasts only a matter of minutes, but hiv is forever.

Have a look through all three condom and lube links in my signature line so you can use condoms with confidence.

ALTHOUGH YOU DO NOT NEED TO TEST OVER A BLOWJOB, anyone who is sexually active should be having a full sexual health care check-up, including but not limited to hiv testing, at least once a year and more often if unprotected intercourse occurs.

If you aren't already having regular, routine check-ups, now is the time to start. As long as you make sure condoms are being used for intercourse, you can fully expect your routine hiv tests to return with negative results. Don't forget to always get checked for all the other sexually transmitted infections as well, because they are MUCH easier to transmit than hiv.

Use condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, correctly and consistently, and you will avoid hiv infection. It really is that simple!

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline worried79

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Re: How safe is Oral Sex for the insertive partner?
« Reply #5 on: November 29, 2009, 12:42:18 PM »
Thank you for the information and all of your support, I plan on being tested soon around 28 days post exposer. I have read that the average time for your body to produce antibodies is 22-25 days post exposer. Does anyone have any first hand experince with testing and does that generally hold true?

I know if I was to be tested I should wait 6 weeks and then test again at three months or 90 days post exposer to be certain but the mind and its fears can be your worst enemy. It causes you to look past reason and science at times.

Does anyone have any additional information on the primate study just out of curiosity, I would be interested to know more.

Thanks again

Offline RapidRod

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Re: How safe is Oral Sex for the insertive partner?
« Reply #6 on: November 29, 2009, 12:46:22 PM »
Reread the replies that you have been given. You were never at risk and don't need testing.

Offline worried79

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Re: How safe is Oral Sex for the insertive partner?
« Reply #7 on: November 29, 2009, 01:30:01 PM »
I know, Thank you.

Offline worried79

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Re: How safe is Oral Sex for the insertive partner?
« Reply #8 on: November 30, 2009, 09:23:29 PM »
Hi Guys,

I know I did not have a risk in my case but I was wondering what were some of the symptoms you guys recalled having or displaying prior to your positive test results?

I know I'm ok and was at no risk or just minimal risk of contracting HIV but like so many other on this forum I have a hard time letting things go. I just get concerned about everything, I guess out of guilt for my bad choices.

I stopped of at a friends house tonight who is a NP to have her look at my swollen lymph node on my neck. She seemed kinda of alarmed by its size. I didn't tell her why I was concerned, that would be to embarrassing. She said they normally won't get as large as mine.

She said my body is fighting a bad virus or infection of some kind. Why do all these symptoms have to fall exactly in line when they should with ARS about 3-4 weeks after my stupidity.

I'm sorry again if I am wasting peoples time hear, I just wonder if anyone remembers how fearful they were prior to their positive test result or the prospects of it.


Offline Ann

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Re: How safe is Oral Sex for the insertive partner?
« Reply #9 on: December 01, 2009, 07:15:57 AM »
Worried,

If you feel unwell or are worried about your lymph node, you'll have to see a doctor. We cannot diagnose you here and will not discuss your symptoms with you. However, we CAN tell you that whatever is going on has NOTHING to do with hiv as you did NOT have a risk. Neither symptoms nor the lack of symptoms will ever tell you a single thing about your hiv status anyway.

Re-read your entire thread - our answers are not going to change in regard to your NO RISK blowjob. You got your dick sucked and now it's time you got over it.


If you read the Welcome Thread before posting like you're supposed to, you will have read the following posting guideline:

Quote

Anyone who continues to post excessively, questioning a conclusive negative result or no-risk situation, will be subject to a four week Time Out (a temporary ban from the Forums). If you continue to post excessively after one Time Out, you may be given a second Time Out which will last eight weeks. There is no third Time Out - it is a permanent ban. The purpose of a Time Out is to encourage you to seek the face-to-face help we cannot provide on this forum.


Please consider yourself warned!

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline worried79

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Re: How safe is Oral Sex for the insertive partner?
« Reply #10 on: December 06, 2009, 07:20:41 PM »
Hello,

So on December 2, 2009 , I tested 28 days post exposer on a Rapid Blood Antibody Test the results came back negative. 

I went to see a doctor about my swollen lymph node on the side of my neck. He told me he did not think it was a lymph node. So  at this point I have two conflicting points of view from medical professionals on what it is.

Thinking I should see a third doctor to try and figure out if it is a lymph node or not? I'm frustrated and worried. I also developed a rash on my left arm about the size of a half dollar in or around the same day that my "lymph node" swelled and I had Diarrhea. The rash lasted about twenty or thirty minutes and was not raised but had really dark red or brown areas. The rash has not been back since that day.

Not sure what to make of it all, I just remember feeling really hot,  like I was on fire when the rash appeared. I felt so hot I had to jump in cool shower to cool down.

Do you think any of this sounds like ARS?

Offline RapidRod

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  • Posts: 15,286
Re: How safe is Oral Sex for the insertive partner?
« Reply #11 on: December 06, 2009, 07:45:31 PM »
Anyone who continues to post excessively, questioning a conclusive negative result or no-risk situation, will be subject to a four week Time Out (a temporary ban from the Forums). If you continue to post excessively after one Time Out, you may be given a second Time Out which will last eight weeks. There is no third Time Out - it is a permanent ban. The purpose of a Time Out is to encourage you to seek the face-to-face help we cannot provide on this forum.

You need to start reading the replies you have been given.

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: How safe is Oral Sex for the insertive partner?
« Reply #12 on: December 07, 2009, 08:05:19 AM »
There is absolutely nothing HIV specific about anything you are reporting. That's not surprising since you didn't have a risk for HIV transmission, even if your head and your fears are telling you otherwise.

Whatever is going on is something for you to sort out with your doctor(s). You're heading to a Time Out before long about this non-risk incident. There's really nothing more we can say about it. No Risk!
Andy Velez

Offline worried79

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  • Posts: 9
Re: How safe is Oral Sex for the insertive partner?
« Reply #13 on: December 10, 2009, 05:50:03 PM »
Andy,

Thank you so much for being kind. I know you deal with a milllion silly what if situations everyday from concerned people all over the world. I know that must drive you crazy but you always seem to keep your cool.

Your an awesome guy and thank you so much for taking the time to talk with me it has helped me a lot. The "No Risk"  thing is hard to accept sometimes but I sure pray you guys are right. I know you certainly have more experience and understanding related to HIV than I do, but the internet can scare the He** out of you.

You know I'm a husband and a father to three young children and I really messed up, I let my family and myself down. I feel bad about what happened and am not sure why I ever thought it was a good idea.

Thanks again for your understanding and compassion to others.

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: How safe is Oral Sex for the insertive partner?
« Reply #14 on: December 10, 2009, 06:10:16 PM »
You're welcome.

Fortunately your regret and guilt are not factors which change the non-risk of your having gotten yourself a blowjob. Yes, I know you have a family. The best thing you can do for them and for yourself is to take a good deep breath, accept that incident as a part of your personal histry, breathe out and let it go. There are no extra points given for torturing yourself about HIV when there was no risk for it.

Breathe and get on with your life. Aside from everything else that is the best thing you can do for your loved ones as contrasted with suffering and lugging a load of guilt around. Waste of life and energy to do that, bud.

Cheers.
Andy Velez

Offline worried79

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Re: How safe is Oral Sex for the insertive partner?
« Reply #15 on: January 20, 2010, 12:30:46 AM »
Hi Guys,
 I was reading some of the past post on HIV / DNA Testing. My question is, some sites on the web claim that after 28 days a HIV / DNA Test is conclusive. Is that true? I understand (NAAT / DNA Testing) has been approved and used by bloodbanks for many years now to screen donors for earily infection. Is DNA Testing reliable after 28 days?

Thanks for your time.

Offline Matty the Damned

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Re: How safe is Oral Sex for the insertive partner?
« Reply #16 on: January 20, 2010, 12:49:55 AM »
HIV PCR-DNA testing is NOT approved for diagnostic purposes in individuals. It produces an unacceptably high rate of false positive results.

But all of this is irrelevant here. You were not at risk of being infected and you do not need to be tested.

If you are having difficulties accepting this perhaps your time would be more profitably spent talking face-to-face with a counselor or therapist, rather than trawling the internet looking for information about a disease you do not have.

MtD

Offline worried79

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Testing Question
« Reply #17 on: May 20, 2010, 04:53:02 PM »
After a recent possible exposer I tested negative at 5 weeks with a PCR DNA test and Antibody test.

At seven weeks I tested negative with a Uni Gold Rapid Blood Test

& at 12 weeks and six days I again test negative with the Uni Gold Rapid Blood Test.

Am I conclusively negative? Do I need any further testing & would the DNA test really have found the vires if it were in my body at five weeks? My biggest worry is it may take six months to know for sure.

Thanks

Offline RapidRod

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Re: Testing Question
« Reply #18 on: May 20, 2010, 04:54:03 PM »
   Please do not start a new thread every time you have another question or thought - regardless if you think your questions are related to each other or not. It helps us to help you when you keep all your thoughts or questions in one thread and it helps other readers to follow the discussion. Additional threads will be merged.


   If you cannot find your thread, click on the "Show own posts" link in the left-hand column of any forum page, under your name.

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: How safe is Oral Sex for the insertive partner?
« Reply #19 on: May 20, 2010, 05:12:17 PM »
I've merged your threads here. In the future if you have anything to say, please follow our rule and keep it all in this same thread.

As far as your latest question is concerned, you have reliably tested negative. You are HIV negative. Period. End of story.
Andy Velez

 


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