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Author Topic: HIV+ friend, anal fingering, cuts on fingers, please help!  (Read 33479 times)

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Offline hopefulforhelp

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HIV+ friend, anal fingering, cuts on fingers, please help!
« on: August 17, 2006, 10:42:03 AM »
Hello all and thank you for the service. I am highly concerned I've exposed myself to HIV. I have tested, probably too much, given I am still within the window period. Logic tells me I'm going to be negative, yet my fear is out of control. I have asked my doc for anxiety meds, but the effects likely wont help for a few weeks.

My Pos friend and I had several exposures. The friendship remains but the relationship couldn't work. Kissing, protected oral (me to him) unprotected oral (him to me) protected vaginal intercourse, and anal fingering (him to me) I know, no documented cases of transmission by fingering. Extra conditions present are what is alarming.

I was recently diagnosed with HSV2. I've never had an OB. I suspect it may be anally. The anal fingering happened the last night we were together 3 wks ago. Shortly after, I wiped a fair amount of blood from my anal area. I didn't realize it then and thought it was residual bleeding from my period. I wasn't concerned for HIV as I thought we were entirely safe. Until a couple of weeks later when I wiped a fair amount of blood from my anal area after a large bowl (sorry for the detail). I have since been told I have hemorrhoids, but I still suspect herpes. Either way, bleeding is bleeding. I know HIV can not penetrate intact skin. I did not get any of his seman or blood on me, I think. The additional problem is he had cuts on his fingers. Both very small. One old and well scabbed over and the scab did not come off. The other was a few hours old. I highly doubt he used this finger as he put a bandaide on after showering just before our time together.

1 what is my statistical risk. I'm trying to tell myself very low based on what I've read.

2 when is testing truly accurate? I've heard one can test positive as soon as 10 days post exposure, that the Oraquick rapid 1/2 can detect in 99% by 20-25 days. Yet a conclusive negative isn't until 3months. Odd it would work both ways.

3 symptoms, oh boy the symptoms. I have most all, except the most defining one of fever. Is a fever always present? I've read 95% it is. My nodes aren't too swollen or concerning either. What is really freaking me out is this blotchy rash and freckles popping up everywhere. What does an ARS rash look like? Most sites I've seen pictures on are rather severe. Can it be mild too? My appetite is strong as ever, Is that a defining symptom or not?

4 my friend has been pos for 10 years. when last tested his viral load was undetectable. he hasn't tested in awhile and that is concerning to me. I assume the higher the viral load the more contagious? Is that true? He's in perfect health otherwise, so how likely is it he's on the high side?

Given all the odds I believe are in my favor, I am routing for anxiety (meds are on the way). In the meantime, I am trapped in my fear and the one unexplainable symptom of rash is getting worse. It started at roughly 16 days after and I tested at 21 days after, negative. I just went for a CBC and a few other tests to see if anthing else can explain my crappy feeling. I probably should have asked for viral load testing but was scared. My doc has no idea of my HIV fear, only the clinic does. The clinic thinks I'm fine and perhaps need to drink more (they were just kidding) but after I told them about the blood, they suggested going to an Infectious Disease clinic too. Oh God! Now I'm terrified. Please help to calm me!

Offline RapidRod

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Re: HIV+ friend, anal fingering, cuts on fingers, please help!
« Reply #1 on: August 17, 2006, 10:52:50 AM »
You don't get HIV by being fingered...Period. Doesn't matter if he had cuts, scrapes or etc.  You didn't have a risk for HIV. Your not going to get HSV2 from being fingered either. Take care of your hemorrhoids, they can be a pain in the ass.

Offline hopefulforhelp

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Re: HIV+ friend, anal fingering, cuts on fingers, please help!
« Reply #2 on: August 17, 2006, 11:01:21 AM »
 ;D Thank you for the humor! And the stress relief! The HSV2 was confirmed via Herpes Select blood test 6 months ago, I've never seen anything odd but a lil butt rash. He doesn't have HSV so I wasn't worried about getting it 'again' just the possible open sores.

I don't want to be a 'pain in the ass'  ;D Is it possible for anxiety to cause all the 'symptoms' I've got? Even a rash? Is my 3wk test conclusive enough to stop panicing?

Your picture is cool! and I wont tell anyone you got loose! lol!
Thank you

Offline RapidRod

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Re: HIV+ friend, anal fingering, cuts on fingers, please help!
« Reply #3 on: August 17, 2006, 11:19:52 AM »
Anxiety can cause all the symptoms you are having. You didn't need a test to begin with, so you can go on with you life. Continue to use condoms and plenty of water base lube.

Offline Ann

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Re: HIV+ friend, anal fingering, cuts on fingers, please help!
« Reply #4 on: August 17, 2006, 12:12:40 PM »
hope,

1. Your "statistical" risk is zero. You didn't have a risk.

2. The vast majority of people who have actually been infected will seroconvert and test positive by six weeks, with the average time to seroconversion being only 22 days. A negative result should be confirmed at the 12-13 week point, at which time it will be conclusive. The window period is three months to catch the rare person who takes slightly longer that six weeks to produce detectable antibodies.

3. Symptoms or the lack of symptoms mean nothing when it comes to hiv infection. Nothing you report is hiv specific and could be caused by dozens, if not thousands of other illnesses. If you're having problems with your body, discuss them with your doctor. As you did not have a risk of hiv infection, the cause will not be hiv.

4. Your friend's viral load is of no concern to you as you did nothing to put you at risk of infection.

By the way, NO, you should NOT have asked for viral load testing. Those tests are NOT approved for diagnostic use as they have a high rate of FALSE positives. You don't want one of those, believe me. You do not need any further hiv testing over your activities with your friend as you were not at risk in anything you did.

Seriously, you can rest easy. You didn't do anything risky.

You need to know that condoms MUST be used with anyone, no matter what you might think their hiv status is. You need to be using condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, every time, no exceptions until such time as you are in a securely monogamous relationship where you have both tested for ALL STIs together. To agree to have unprotected intercourse is to consent to the possibility of being infected with a sexually transmitted infection.

Have a look through the condom and lube links in my signature line so you can make sure your fella is using them properly. While you're on either of those pages, have a look through the bottom three links in the left-hand column. They discuss ways that you, as a woman, can protect yourself. I recommend the female condom as they are also excellent barriers against hiv infection, and importantly, they give YOU the control over condom use. They can even be put in place in advance so you're not fumbling around at the crucial moment. They're fiddly to use at first, but if you can put a tampon in, you can use these. It gets easier with practice. Give them a try.

Anyone who is sexually active should be having a full sexual health care check-up, including but not limited to hiv testing, at least once a year and more often if unprotected intercourse occurs.

If you aren't already having regular, routine check-ups, now is the time to start. As long as you make sure condoms are being used for intercourse, you can fully expect your routine hiv tests to return with negative results. Don't forget to always get checked for all the other sexually transmitted infections as well, because they are MUCH easier to transmit than hiv.

Please also read through the Welcome Thread for further transmission and testing information.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

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"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline hopefulforhelp

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Re: HIV+ friend, anal fingering, cuts on fingers, please help!
« Reply #5 on: August 17, 2006, 12:40:59 PM »
Oh! Thank you both!!! I do feel extremely relieved. I do tend to have anxiety issues over things I fear a loss of control about. I have read on here that when someone thinks the 'symptoms' are from anxiety, they usually are, damn meds can't get here quick enough! lol! I really do feel alot better and appreciate your responses. Thank you specifically Ann on the big NO for viral load. I didn't realize the risk of a false positive. Wow, that wouldve pushed me off the deep end for anxiety!

I also started looking for reasons other than HIV for my rash. It is possible an antihistamine I recently started could be the culpret. I stopped taking it today to try the idea, well see. I do intend to follow thru with my doc on any other 'symptoms', waiting for the CBC to come back... and the meds to kick in.

Sadly due to my anxiety, I do still feel the need to test again in a few weeks. Likely because my friend is positive and it's not a what if on that. Who knows, maybe by then the meds will kick in (hmmn, have I said that enough?) and I'll 'let it go' LOL!

I truly enjoy your certainty and confidence regarding my issue. The service you provide is priceless for piece of mind! Thank you!

on another note... is there anything that can be done for horrid nightmares for those taking Sustiva and Truvada? Should I post that Q in another tread? OK, Thanks again!!!!!!

Offline Ann

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Re: HIV+ friend, anal fingering, cuts on fingers, please help!
« Reply #6 on: August 17, 2006, 01:25:41 PM »
hope,

If you must test, wait at least until the six week point, for reasons stated in #2 of my other post. By the way, it will be negative.

If you want to ask questions on behalf of your friend, post in the appropriate forum. It might be a better idea to encourage him to join us and ask for himself. You can also check out the Lessons and Drugs sections of this website (link in upper left corner of any forum page) and print out the relevent pages.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline hopefulforhelp

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Re: HIV+ friend, anal fingering, cuts on fingers, please help!
« Reply #7 on: August 17, 2006, 08:54:00 PM »
I'm trying to believe I'm negative but the symptoms are out of control. The rash is all over my entire body and I can find no reason for the cause! Please, I beg you tell me where to find infomation on the ARS rash appearance. Where is manifests, what it looks like.
« Last Edit: September 08, 2006, 09:16:46 PM by hopefulforhelp »

Offline RapidRod

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Re: HIV+ friend, anal fingering, cuts on fingers, please help!
« Reply #8 on: August 17, 2006, 08:58:38 PM »
No it not the symptoms that won't stop,  it is you that won't stop. Go to your doctor to find out what your rash is about, it's not about HIV.

Offline hopefulforhelp

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Re: HIV+ friend, anal fingering, cuts on fingers, please help!
« Reply #9 on: August 17, 2006, 09:04:50 PM »
Ok I can appreciate that and I know I need a good smack so thank you. Even so, the info I'm finding which is lacking is leading me to think it is ARS. I've been to my doc, had CBC and other various tests done trying to find an answer. My initial visit the rash was on my stomach, arms and legs... not thinking then, I just noticed now its on my back and ass as well. I intend to find an answer, but I can't get the HIV thought out of my head. Sorry to be a pain in the ass, my hemmroids must be flaring ; )
« Last Edit: September 03, 2006, 11:19:10 AM by hopefulforhelp »

Offline Mr.Man

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Re: HIV+ friend, anal fingering, cuts on fingers, please help!
« Reply #10 on: August 18, 2006, 06:18:44 PM »
Hopeful, I must voice my disdain for BLANKET advise, such as "You don't get HIV by being fingered...Period. Doesn't matter if he had cuts, scrapes or etc." and "Your "statistical" risk is zero. You didn't have a risk." and "You didn't need a test to begin with, so you can go on with you life. Continue to use condoms and plenty of water base lube." The Culprits know who they are.

Has anyone stopped to ask (1) "What was the depth of your friend's cut? (2) Was it still bleeding?

Surely it doesn't take a Rocket Scientist to know that blood to blood contact is a high-risk situation for HIV transmission. The blood can be on your Toe, Finger, Nose, Ear, or TiT. It all comes from the same place.

So, while "HIV doesn't come from fingering" is a popular rallying-cry on the internet, I urge us to use a little more patience, and consideration to what can be a unique situation, before repeating something that we've read before.

Yes rapid, I'm talking to u.

PS - Rash may be caused by anything. But it is also  categirized as a symptom of HIV. Sorry to be the Devil's Advocate, but I think it is required.

Offline hopefulforhelp

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Re: HIV+ friend, anal fingering, cuts on fingers, please help!
« Reply #11 on: August 18, 2006, 06:40:20 PM »
Ok, here's the update... no one has the same advise! That's alarming to say the least. My CBC+ labs are not back yet. Infectious diesease nurse says yep you do have an odd rash and swollen nodes yada yada, but no way to know without testing. She also claims I need a real antibody test to detect HIV serum?!? not the Ora Qucik Rapid 1/2 blood... so what's the difference? No idea. The clinic swears byu the OQR and says it would detect in 21-25 days... that's be tomorrow. I'm still clueless...except now I've got a low grade fever too.

Mr Man, thanks for the concern... the cut on my friends finger was very small and scabbed over noted in the first post. All in all I still think the odds are with me but I don't believe for a second the 'no risk'.  After reading many posts on the 'I just tested positive' and a members response that they get one question a week with no obvious exposure, what's pretty clear to me at this point is A virus is a virus and it can be elusive. Period.

What would be really nice is if I could get some accurate info on the 'symptoms'. I know no one can self diagnose. I know no one can diagnose on symptoms alone. It's too soon for me to test and I'd like to ditch some of these fears that are keeping me from living. I'd still like some rash pictures if anyone can direct me to a site, that'd be appreciated. Thanks
« Last Edit: August 21, 2006, 09:42:13 PM by hopefulforhelp »

Offline Ann

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Re: HIV+ friend, anal fingering, cuts on fingers, please help!
« Reply #12 on: August 18, 2006, 06:46:45 PM »
hope,

You can believe what you want and test as much as you like, but as long as you haven't been having unprotected anal or vaginal intercourse, you are going to test negative. You don't need to test over this specific incident.

Ann
« Last Edit: August 21, 2006, 05:07:36 PM by Ann »
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline Ann

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Re: HIV+ friend, anal fingering, cuts on fingers, please help!
« Reply #13 on: August 18, 2006, 06:49:05 PM »
Mr Man,

Don't think you're going to be allowed to scare-monger in this forum. If you have further comments, start your own thread, don't hijack the threads of others.

Make sure you read the Welcome Thread, take note of our posting guidelines and follow the Lessons links. Thank you for your cooperation.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline hopefulforhelp

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Re: HIV+ friend, anal fingering, cuts on fingers, please help!
« Reply #14 on: August 21, 2006, 02:42:32 PM »
Hi Ann, Thank you for the reassurance. I wish it was enough, but I am going nuts. Dr H says I have a 1/1000 risk maybe lower. I still believe the odds are with me, but this rash is out of control. I can't test with accuracy yet. I can't get into a dermatologist yet. My regular doc has no idea what the rash is. It's getting worse. To no avail, I have searched for any reason other than HIV why freckles would be popping up on my stomach, neck, face, arms and legs and nothing. Nothing Ann. Please please tell me as new freckles (In some areas not exposed to the sun, red, light brown, dark brown) are coming in every day along with a red blotchy rash everywhere.

I've read ARS symptoms would start 2-4 weeks. I'm in the timeline. I've read in one of your other posts that you've never heard of symptoms lasting more than a week unless someone needed to be hospitalized for symptoms. I've read fever is almost always present.

The highest my fever was at 99.8 which is hardly a fever and only at night. I've had a multitude of other symptoms a (concerning ones little over a week) yet the rash is most alarming. I can see stress/ anxiety causing hives. I do not have hives. There is not any information about anxiety causing freckles.

Please direct me to rash information to calm this fear. Thank you

Offline RapidRod

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Re: HIV+ friend, anal fingering, cuts on fingers, please help!
« Reply #15 on: August 21, 2006, 04:31:17 PM »
ARS does NOT cause freckles or moles. YOU DON'T GET HIV BY FINGERING.

Freckles are flat tan, brown or black spots that appear over time on areas of skin that have been exposed to the sun.

The basic cause of freckles is special cells in the skin that produce a pigment called melanin. Melanin is what gives skin its color. Sunlight hitting the skin causes the production of more melanin in order to protect the skin layers underneath. If you have melanin that builds up in one place, it will result in freckles. Sunlight also causes freckles already present to become darker.

Offline hopefulforhelp

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Re: HIV+ friend, anal fingering, cuts on fingers, please help!
« Reply #16 on: August 21, 2006, 05:48:20 PM »
Hey RapidRod, thank you for the reply. I have freckles on my shoulders and have for years. I know as I age I'll get more and have on my chest and back... sunexpsed areas and they pop up over time.

What's baffling me is the ones on my breasts, stomach, under side of my arms (as I can't tell on top side of my arms whats 'new') and upper thighs. Although sun exposed many have shown up on my neck and face in a matter of days. Check this article out... I'm freaking because mast cells have a direct relationship to the immune system...

If I could just get someone to answer the questions I have, I'd likely feel much better... instead of looking in all the wrong places.Thanks.

As far as no risk... I wont even comment on the CDC's theories, but Dr H told me 1 in 1000 and on Dr Bob's site, although he hasn't answered my specific question, there is at least a theoretical risk when cuts are present...

I don't want to be a bother to any of you. I hope to hell I get diagnosed with hypochondrial paranoia, but in the meantime while I'm waiting... can ya'll help?
« Last Edit: August 21, 2006, 09:41:21 PM by hopefulforhelp »

Offline RapidRod

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Re: HIV+ friend, anal fingering, cuts on fingers, please help!
« Reply #17 on: August 21, 2006, 09:06:30 PM »
There is nothing more to discuss about this. You don't get HIV from fingering. Doesn't matter if there are nicks, cuts or hang nails. It doesn't happen. Period.

Online Matty the Damned

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Re: HIV+ friend, anal fingering, cuts on fingers, please help!
« Reply #18 on: August 21, 2006, 09:19:04 PM »
Helpful,

Please don't post links to images in this forum. It causes the more delicate types and the symptom shoppers (such as yourself) to freak out. Then we (Ann, Andy, Rod, JK, myself et al) have to spend extra time cleaning up the mess.

MtD

Offline hopefulforhelp

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Re: HIV+ friend, anal fingering, cuts on fingers, please help!
« Reply #19 on: August 21, 2006, 10:50:36 PM »
Links removed, sorry. I was just hoping for some answers and obviously, I'm still looking in the wrong place. I have been to real clinics that seem perplexed. I have been told I put myself at risk, minimal as it may be. I have been told I need to test  for a confirmed answer. I know that. I know symptoms can't diagnose.

Symptom shopper? Maybe to you. Matty, I do not freak out over every little thing that 'appears' on my body. I do not freak out over every sexual encounter I have. If that were the case, I would have never attempted a realationship with my HIV+ friend. Aside from informing myself, I was not too concerned with any risk or symptoms until I realized the blood that night came from my anal area. Then, true, I had some panic. I probably could be thrown into the 'worry well' group given the current anxiety of 'what's worng with me'.

All I wanted, given the situation and contradicting risk assesments, was some concrete information on the ARS symptoms. Not to freak out about anything, but to remove the panic that the rash I have (that no one has been able to explain) is NOT due to ARS. That's all. I hardly wanted to be barked at that I had no risk when others are telling me I did and then be condesended to for asking what I felt were resonable questions. I'm not trying to bicker over whos right or whos wrong all I wanted was to have someone I could turn to and help with my fears. (Talking to a shrink that is clueless about HIV would do nothing for my reality)
« Last Edit: September 08, 2006, 09:14:50 PM by hopefulforhelp »

Offline hopefulforhelp

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Re: HIV+ friend, anal fingering, cuts on fingers, please help!
« Reply #20 on: August 23, 2006, 09:09:31 AM »
Hi again, one last question if you don't mind?

Per your welcome thread...

HIV-positive people with very high viral loads (high amounts of HIV in their blood and genital secretions) may be more likely to transmit the virus to their partners, during unprotected insertive anal, vaginal, or oral sex. The presence of STDs, especially ulcerative STDs, can increase the risk of spreading (or becoming infected with) HIV. Trauma – such as abrasions or cuts inside the vagina, anus, mouth, or on the penis – can also increase the risk of transmission. Also... While it is theoretically possible that someone who has an open cut or fresh abrasion on his or her finger or hand can be infected with HIV if coming into contact with blood in the anus or vagina or vaginal secretions, there has never been a documented case of HIV transmission via fingering.

What about the other way around? The one being fingered getting HIV from someone positive with cuts? I don't see how others have told me I placed myself at risk, more than most yet still minimal yet you guys say no way. I know symptoms are meaningless as far as diagnosis. I have tested negative after 26days which is a good sign. My CBC came back with a slightly elevated WBC count and high end yet in range RBC platlet, all good as 45% of acute HIV+ would likely show opposite (right?) I still logically believe I'll be ok, but that darn fear of this incident.

My symptoms that started in the ARS timeline are diasappearing. With some exceptions. Also, I've noticed what I think may be an HSV2 issue, I know probably due to stress but I'm concened it's my immune system faultering. I take Lysine, Selenium, GSE, vitamins and other supplements to keep my immune system up since the HSV2 diagnosis. It's worked great so far.

I still plan to test at 6 wks and again at 3 mos, just to be certain. I've read all I can, I've questioned myself to maddness and I no longer care to think about this.

My last, and I do mean last post on this issue is very 'what if' and I appologize for that. Given the remote possibility of late seroconvertion out to three months+, what if I am one of them? What if these 'symptoms' in particular the unexplained rash are HIV related? What if my body has not recognized it and mass T cells have not been wiped out yet? With that thought, I ask...

 ???In terms of treatment (prevention?!?), does it really matter? Would it make a difference to know now, two weeks from now, or two months?  ???

Thank you for all the help.

Offline jkinatl2

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Re: HIV+ friend, anal fingering, cuts on fingers, please help!
« Reply #21 on: August 23, 2006, 10:52:47 AM »
That darn fear.

trust me, I know that darn fear. And I know what it's like to look for patterns and predictions and mathematical certianty in an uncertain circumstance. But you have to realize that what we know of HIV excludes fingering as a potential vector for transmission. It simply does not happen. We can't make it happen in test tubes. We can't manipulate it using monkeys and primates. The epidemiology refuses to document a single case, ever.

It's a straight line, that science, between the cellular and the macro (human) experience. You do not get HIV from fingering.

"Many people, especially in the gay community, turn to oral sex as a safer alternative in the age of AIDS. And with HIV rates rising, people need to remember that oral sex is safer sex. It's a reasonable alternative."

-Kimberly Page-Shafer, PhD, MPH

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Offline hopefulforhelp

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Re: HIV+ friend, anal fingering, cuts on fingers, please help!
« Reply #22 on: August 23, 2006, 10:52:39 PM »
Thank you Jonathan. I hear all of you, despite my endless what if questions, I hear you. Thank you. I'm really tired of thinking about this. I'm really tired of the fear. It's a waste of effort and time, even so, it's my reality. I know that, but as Rapid said way back, it's me that wont stop. I went to see another Doc today about the rash+. He said it's a slim chance, but can't tell me it's not HIV, great. More blood work but there will be no viral load or other quantitative testings as were just going to wait on antibody at 6 weeks, thank you Ann.

Despite my intentions of not, I sit here and stew on the fear. I do hope this is all in my head and I'd be happy to be labeled a neurotic shit. In attempt to counter the fear, I'm trying to see a different perspective on 'what if I am positive' and what I'm seeing is life doesn't end. I wish I knew what else to do about the fear.

I wont be asking anymore risk or testing questions and certainly none about symptoms  ;)  I think it helps to hear from you all, your perspectives and awesome attitudes. Maybe I'll catch ya'll in the off topic forum, if that's ok?
 
Thank you and Take care

Offline hopefulforhelp

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Re: HIV+ friend, anal fingering, cuts on fingers, please help!
« Reply #23 on: August 28, 2006, 04:09:00 AM »
Ok folks, I tried to ignore things, I tried to find comfort in the no risk situation. I tested negative at 35 days AND still, I can not get HIV out of my head. I do hopw I am nuts, but I had full body neuropathy BEfore I read about it. The rash is still present after a couple of weeks. The real odd thing occuring is dark blue veins and red hands when held vertically downward.

Is 35 days 'conclusive' for a 'no risk' fingering exposure?

Offline Ann

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Re: HIV+ friend, anal fingering, cuts on fingers, please help!
« Reply #24 on: August 28, 2006, 05:38:17 AM »
hope,

Yes, any test is conclusive for a no risk event.

Please work with your doctor to find out what, if anything, is going on. "Full body PN" can be an indication of many things, including stress.

Ann
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"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline hopefulforhelp

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Re: HIV+ friend, anal fingering, cuts on fingers, please help!
« Reply #25 on: August 28, 2006, 07:01:51 AM »
Thank for replying ANN. I truly am terrified. My doctor is speculating HIV as a possiblity and I'm concerned given all the symptoms and severity. Are you sure  there is no way, no way to have gotten HIV from fingering with blood present? With him having a cut as well? I am so sorry to keep beating this but I am truly terrified something is seriously wrong here.

Offline Ann

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Re: HIV+ friend, anal fingering, cuts on fingers, please help!
« Reply #26 on: August 28, 2006, 07:21:19 AM »
Hope,

If by some rare, strange, fluke of nature you did become infected through this, you would have most likely either tested inconclusive at 35 days or positive. You didn't, you tested negative.

You weren't at risk of hiv infection. It's time your doctor switched focus from hiv to something rather more plausible as an explanation.

Ann
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"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline hopefulforhelp

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Re: HIV+ friend, anal fingering, cuts on fingers, please help!
« Reply #27 on: August 28, 2006, 07:32:42 AM »
Do the Ora quick rapid blood tests show an indetermined? or just +/-? It was actually only 31 days after that I tested, does that make a difference?
I am sorry to be a pest

Offline Ann

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Re: HIV+ friend, anal fingering, cuts on fingers, please help!
« Reply #28 on: August 28, 2006, 07:39:03 AM »
Hopeful,

Look, if you cannot put this behind you, test again. Just don't be surprised when it's still negative. In the meantime, see if you can't get your doctor to focus on finding out what is actually wrong with you, instead of focusing on hiv, which you didn't have a risk for.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

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"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline hopefulforhelp

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Re: HIV+ friend, anal fingering, cuts on fingers, please help!
« Reply #29 on: August 29, 2006, 10:35:37 PM »
Hi again, well the doc is thinking it's mostly in my head. I could agree except for the PN and vasculitis... I believe that's what the rash is as it's subcutaneous and transient dependant on my body position. So, I called again when my fingers started shaking and 'rash' progressing. He wants me to come in to take a quantitative HIV test?!? Do I do this? False positives an issue? Maybe if I do, it'll be apparent I have another issue that needs to be addressed... I mean really, in the ever so remote fluke of nature I was so unlucky to catch HIV via fingering, and that the 'symptoms' started shortly after 2wks and are still worsening now into the 5th week... yet I tested negative on the 31day? Furthermore, the classic most common symptoms of fever and swollen nodes were barely noticable... so why would the PN/ 'rash' be so bad?!? It is something else, right? Do I do this test? Gotta admit, scared as anything, happy anxiety meds are kickin in a bit... help?

Offline Ann

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Re: HIV+ friend, anal fingering, cuts on fingers, please help!
« Reply #30 on: August 30, 2006, 03:50:28 AM »
hope,

If by "qualitative" you mean a PCR (viral load) test, then you'd be wise to decline. The last thing you need with the emotional state you're in is a false positive - and PCRs are famous for them.

If the only things your doctor can offer as an explanation to your problems is unwarranted and inappropriate hiv testing or saying "it's in your head", then perhaps it's time to seek a second opinion. At the very least, if the doctor thinks the origin of your symptoms is emotional, he should have referred you to the appropriate mental health care provider.

Fingering is NOT a risk for hiv transmission.

Ann
« Last Edit: August 30, 2006, 03:52:30 AM by Ann »
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"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline hopefulforhelp

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Re: HIV+ friend, anal fingering, cuts on fingers, please help!
« Reply #31 on: September 01, 2006, 06:31:03 AM »
Thanks Ann! I logically believe my risk is nil. It's these damn symptoms. The doc I have is new and it does kinda aggrivate me that he wants to jump on the 'somatic thoughts' as an answer. I admit anxiety can be enhancing some issues, but certainly not creating others. The symptoms are driving the anxiety as they diminish, so does my fear. He claims he only wanted to test to calm me down with a negative result (not viral load, just antibody) We both know it wont as it's still technically in the window period. He did ask me if I ever used IV drugs. I have not, yet could he be thinking I'd convert later due to a compromised immune system?

I am also thinking I'm having a bad reaction to sulfa based antbitics. It to can cause many of the issues I'm having. My doc agrees as possible, yet it wouldn't carry on this long. Well niether would ARS right? If under allergic attack, would my immune system give false negatives?

The big thing I can't get over is the mottl'd skin I have. I do have an appointment with a dermatologist for a second opinion. About a week ago, everything peaked and I had one hell of a weekend, every symptom present except high fever and nodes. I know, a million other things. I know you dont like talking symptoms as they're never a good indicator. I'm sorry but if I may, it'd be unheard of to have acute PN for only a week, severe on one night and mottl'd skin for almost two weeks without the classic fever and nodes, right? Furthermore, the 'rash' I have is going on a month now, way too long for ARS as well?

My poz pal says I'm nuts and it's too bad as I'd be perfect without the anxiety regarding this. He'll be back in the county soon and plans to kick my a*s for useless worry. I know you guys don't like links, but I thought this one appropriate, let me know if you'd like it removed.

http://beatnikboy.tripod.com/worried.htm

I really dont know how you put up with all these crazy questions from people like me, but I'm glad you do!
« Last Edit: September 03, 2006, 11:24:30 AM by hopefulforhelp »

Offline Ann

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Re: HIV+ friend, anal fingering, cuts on fingers, please help!
« Reply #32 on: September 01, 2006, 06:52:40 AM »
Hopeful,

You'd be surprised at what sort of physical problems anxiety can cause. Yes, it can make pre-existing conditions worse, but it can cause problems where there were none too.

I would imagine he asked about your drug use history to ascertain if you'd been at risk in the past. IV drug use only might cause problems if it is current, daily and has been going on for years. Past use doesn't figure into it, aside from the previous risk factor angle.

A sulfa based reaction is a possibility. An allergic reaction will not impact on your hiv test results.

As for your rash, let's just wait and let the specialist diagnose you. As you didn't have a risk of infection, it's not going to be ARS related.

Fingering is not a risk for hiv infection.

Ann
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"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline hopefulforhelp

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Re: HIV+ friend, anal fingering, cuts on fingers, please help!
« Reply #33 on: September 04, 2006, 10:14:48 PM »
Thank you again Ann. The longer this goes on the less I think it's HIV/ ARS, although it is still on my mind. I'll find out more from a dermatologist this week and the 5+ week antibody test my doc wanted me to take will maybe get him going on something else. In trying to find an answer, I have been reading when I have time about my 'symptoms' and sadly, HIV does seem to pop up, without me looking. I believe you for nil risk on the fingering, I just can't believe this is anxiety as I am incredible calm since most of symptoms have ended. The major one remaining is my 'rash' that started 2+weeks post exposure and it's progressively getting worse now at 6+ weeks. Initial freckle burst/ mast cells, riticularis looking veins, blotchy suburn red subcutaneously, and now completely mottl'd skin as well as macular papular areas. No way this is ARS right?
« Last Edit: September 04, 2006, 11:49:14 PM by hopefulforhelp »

Offline RapidRod

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Re: HIV+ friend, anal fingering, cuts on fingers, please help!
« Reply #34 on: September 05, 2006, 07:00:34 AM »
Freckles are caused by sun exposure NOT HIV.

Offline hopefulforhelp

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Re: HIV+ friend, anal fingering, cuts on fingers, please help!
« Reply #35 on: September 06, 2006, 05:00:20 PM »
Hi all, Ok I'm absolutely ready to say it.... YOU WERE RIGHT! Although there is something amiss with my health, it is not, nor was it ever caused by HIV. The timing on all this just really sucked!
I tested negative today on a rapid test, 6wks 2days after our last encounter. So that would mean I'm absolutely in the clear, at least for HIV? I have seen other postings for a 13wk test, do I need to concern myself? I know no risk on the fingering, you've all drilled that into my head (many thanks for putting up with me) but multiple encounters, unseen mishaps? I'm not going to 'worry' anymore, promise.
Thanks again
« Last Edit: September 08, 2006, 09:11:47 PM by hopefulforhelp »

Offline Ann

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Re: HIV+ friend, anal fingering, cuts on fingers, please help!
« Reply #36 on: September 07, 2006, 06:35:11 AM »
Hope,

Considering you never had a risk through fingering, you can take your six week test to be conclusive. You are hiv negative, just as we suspected.

Just make sure you are protecting yourself in future by insisting your partner uses condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse - or use the female condoms I mentioned to you earlier - and you will remain hiv negative. Please do not have unprotected intercourse until you are in a securely monogamous relationship where you have tested negative together.

Use condoms and avoid hiv infection. It really is that simple!

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

 


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