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Author Topic: stupid me  (Read 1642 times)

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Offline kurks101

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stupid me
« on: May 23, 2009, 05:23:40 AM »
i am bi-

only have had sex with 3 girls
(unprotected twice with the same girlfriend of two years)

never had sex with a guy until today
i had friend who is also bi- on the DL and we had planned on hooking up before and finally did today. He gave me oral, and wanted to me to "top" him, he asked if i had a condom and i said i could run down to the gas station, i got up to go, i asked if i should go and get one or should i just forget about it and not have sex. he said we could just go ahead and said it was up to me.  for some stupid reason i was just like whatever, and for bout 5-6 min. we had unprotected sex, i pulled out after this time when i realized how stupid what i was doin was, so i stopped it and he performed oral on me again.
i know this was risky and i know i should get tested because i haven't yet, my question is when should i do it, and what other stds can i get from this stupid encounter (im only 20 btw)


Offline Ann

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Re: stupid me
« Reply #1 on: May 23, 2009, 05:50:12 AM »
kurks,

Each and every time you have unprotected anal or vaginal intercourse, you're putting yourself at risk for hiv. It's not just men on the DL who might have hiv - hiv doesn't discriminate and neither should you. It's not just hiv either, you can get any and every STI in the book by having unprotected intercourse.

As you were the insertive (top) partner, your risk is somewhat lower than if you bottomed, but lower risk is in no way NO risk. Please stop taking chances with your life and health.

The earliest you should test is at six weeks, as the vast majority of people who have actually been infected will seroconvert and test postive by this time. A negative six week result is highly unlikely to change, but MUST be confirmed at the three month point.

You need to be using condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, every time, no exceptions until such time as you are in a securely monogamous relationship where you have both tested for ALL sexually transmitted infections together. To agree to have unprotected intercourse is to consent to the possibility of being infected with an STI. Sex without a condom lasts only a matter of minutes, but hiv is forever.

Have a look through all three condom and lube links in my signature line so you can use condoms with confidence.

Anyone who is sexually active should be having a full sexual health care check-up, including but not limited to hiv testing, at least once a year and more often if unprotected intercourse occurs.

If you aren't already having regular, routine check-ups, now is the time to start. As long as you make sure condoms are being used for intercourse, you can fully expect your routine hiv tests to return with negative results. Don't forget to always get checked for all the other sexually transmitted infections as well, because they are MUCH easier to transmit than hiv.

Use condoms, correctly and consistently and whether you're with a woman or a man, and you will avoid hiv infection. It really is that simple!

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline kurks101

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  • Posts: 4
Re: stupid me
« Reply #2 on: May 23, 2009, 05:55:15 AM »
thanks for the information. i know it was stupid as hell, how easily can u get hiv?  like can u get it easily in such a short period?

Offline Ann

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  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: stupid me
« Reply #3 on: May 23, 2009, 06:34:30 AM »
kurks,

Yes, you can get it that easily. It doesn't matter if it's the first time you bareback, or the 10,000th. While exposure doesn't necessarily equal transmission, it is possible even in a short period of time. However, the odds are in your favour of testing negative in this specific situation, partly because you topped and partly because of the short period of time.

You need to know that even though your chances of testing negative are good, what you're doing when you bareback is playing russian roulette. There's no way of knowing if you got the loaded chamber or not, at least not untl you test. I do know people who ended up positive following one exposure. So wise up and start using condoms. OK? No glove, no love. Simple as.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline kurks101

  • Member
  • Posts: 4
Re: stupid me
« Reply #4 on: July 16, 2009, 06:54:08 AM »
they said to post in original thread.

this is a completly different topic./scenerio but i think this is where i have to post it:




so i recently got tested for everything (hiv/std/blood test/rectum/oral swab everything) last week. and tested negative for everything,

I have an anal fissure i think, that comes up everyonce in while, since i was like . Im 19 now.

Ok so the follwoing may make me sound loose, but I its my life

the other day i hooked up with a guy who i let rim me.  The anal fissure was present but only hurt when i tried to insert a finger. (he is hiv- and std clean)

Today, i hooked up with a freind of mine and he topped me, and for some of the time he didn't use a condom. (hes clean as well)

i dont know much about anal fissures,  and i wanna know if it can create/cause any stds, and if i can catch anything more easily.  Basically i don't want to give anybody anything.  .
does that make any sense at all ha?

Offline RapidRod

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Re: stupid me
« Reply #5 on: July 16, 2009, 06:57:24 AM »
They have a term for people like yourself, it's called a bug chaser. Keep having unprotected anal sex and you'll end up contracting HIV.

Offline Ann

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  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: stupid me
« Reply #6 on: July 16, 2009, 07:04:29 AM »
kurks,

For a start, I'm clean - I just had a shower, but I'm also hiv positive. It's highly insulting to use the word "clean" to describe someone's sexual health.

Yes, having an anal fissure and engaging in unprotected, receptive anal intercourse (bareback bottoming) makes you MUCH more susceptible to hiv and other STIs.

Unless you're in a monogamous relationship with this guy and have tested TOGETHER with him, in no way should you be bareback bottoming for him. How can you really know he's hiv negative? He may only THINK he's negative. If he's barebacking with you, he's probably barebacking with others too. You're playing roulette with your life and health and you need to wise up and stop before it's too late.

You need to test again for all STIs and also hiv at the appropriate time.

If you keep playing this dangerous barebacking game, sooner or later you'll be joining us in the "I Just Tested Poz" forum. No kidding. It's as simple as that. Serosorting doesn't work for negative guys, so be warned. WAKE UP!!!

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline kurks101

  • Member
  • Posts: 4
Re: stupid me
« Reply #7 on: July 16, 2009, 11:27:17 AM »
thank you rapid rod, for not answering my question and basically calling me a slut.  Yes, i understand my, risk, and have made some immature decisions, when i am intoxicated, and "in the moment."  I am going to make sure to always use a condom, but at least i have enough sense to get tested, regularly, my other bad spur of the moment decisions im still working on getting rid of.

Offline Ann

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  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: stupid me
« Reply #8 on: July 16, 2009, 11:47:21 AM »
Kurks,

I think it's safe to say that pretty much all of us on the poz side of these forums got there by making bad choices. I know I did.

However, if it takes shocking language to get you to wake up and stop putting yourself at risk, then that's what you'll get here. We don't pull any punches and we tell it like it is. I don't want to see you end up poz. I wish someone had given me a good telling off before I got infected. It's too late for me, but hopefully it's not too late for you.

However, it does sound like you're taking a good hard look at your sexual practices and hopefullly something good will come of that.

Good luck with the testing. Hopefully you'll be ok this time - and there won't be a next time!

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

 


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