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Author Topic: was i at risk?  (Read 4334 times)

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Offline howie

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was i at risk?
« on: July 01, 2009, 09:18:25 AM »
i am in my late twenties and a homosexual. i had an hiv antibody test on me this week and the result was negative. i still have to do another test in 3 months (the clinic where i went to suggested 6 months) since I had oral/anal sex for the previous 3 months. i have a couple of questions that i hope you could shed light on.

1. i had oral and anal sex with my bf who i have since broken off with. We always practiced safe sex. During a couple of our encounters, I bled from the anus but the condom did not break. was i at risk?

2. i had a one night stand with a guy. we had oral and anal sex. we used condoms. when i did oral sex on him i tasted precum on 2 instances. the first one i spit and the second one i swallowed using saliva. i have bad gums (my gums bleed when i brush my teeth although i did not brush before i performed oral sex). was i at risk?

i'm scared that i might have been infected with hiv.

please help!

thanks.

Offline Ann

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Re: was i at risk?
« Reply #1 on: July 01, 2009, 09:41:37 AM »
Howie,

You have not been at risk for hiv infection. You don't need futher testing at this time. Condoms have been proven to prevent hiv infection. It doesn't matter if you bled or not afterwards, you were still protected by the condom.

As for giving oral, the risk here is more theoretical than real. When it's said that poor oral health can make it a risk, they don't mean if your gums bleed when you brush, they mean if you have really terrible oral health, like meth mouth. (see photo below) While you'd be wise to not blow anyone immediately after brushing your teeth, you don't need to worry about brushing them earlier.

We even have studies that support this. There have been long-term studies of couples where one is positive and one is negative. In the couples who used condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, but no barrier for oral activities, not one of the negative partners became infected with hiv. Not one.

You need to be using condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, every time, no exceptions until such time as you are in a securely monogamous relationship where you have both tested for ALL sexually transmitted infections together. To agree to have unprotected intercourse is to consent to the possibility of being infected with an STI. Sex without a condom lasts only a matter of minutes, but hiv is forever.

Have a look through all three condom and lube links in my signature line so you can use condoms with confidence.

ALTHOUGH YOU DO NOT NEED FURTHER HIV TESTING AT THIS TIME, anyone who is sexually active should be having a full sexual health care check-up, including but not limited to hiv testing, at least once a year and more often if unprotected intercourse occurs.

If you aren't already having regular, routine check-ups, now is the time to start. As long as you make sure condoms are being used for intercourse, you can fully expect your routine hiv tests to return with negative results. Don't forget to always get checked for all the other sexually transmitted infections as well, because they are MUCH easier to transmit than hiv.

Use condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, correctly and consistently, and you will avoid hiv infection. It really is that simple!

Ann


[attachment deleted by admin]
Condoms are a girl's best friend

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"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: was i at risk?
« Reply #2 on: July 01, 2009, 09:41:41 AM »
The key element in what you have written is that you and your ex and your one-nighter both used condoms for anal intercourse. Condoms provide very effective protection.

As far as giving oral is concerned the risk is really more theoretical than actual. Your saliva has over a dozen elements and proteins which very effective prevent the transmission of viable HIV. Can it happen? Sure, but in the real world of HIV we know that it's about unprotected vaginal and anal intercourse.

From what you have reported I do expect you will test negative. Keep using those condoms everytime no matter whom youi are with.

Good luck on your test if you decide to re-test. It's strictly for your peace of mind and not because you had a risk.

Cheers.  
Andy Velez

Offline howie

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Re: was i at risk?
« Reply #3 on: July 01, 2009, 08:39:52 PM »
Ann/Andy,

Thanks for the reply. It was a confidence booster. I was getting very paranoid and had mild anxiety attacks. It's pretty hard since I live independently, in the closet, and no support group.

Howie

Offline howie

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Re: was i at risk?
« Reply #4 on: July 06, 2009, 06:13:33 PM »
I'm back. One more question though. I know that using condoms during insertive sex is very effective in preventing HIV infection. But is there a possibility that one could be infected when using condoms? What comes to mind is only when the condom breaks/torn (fringe loop on the penis) during sex. Am I correct? Also, Is it true that the virus cannot wiggle itself out of the condom through the "miniscule" holes in the rubber like for instances when a girl gets pregnant even though the condom did not break?

Offline RapidRod

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Re: was i at risk?
« Reply #5 on: July 06, 2009, 06:15:01 PM »
Anyone who continues to post excessively, questioning a conclusive negative result or no-risk situation, will be subject to a four week Time Out (a temporary ban from the Forums). If you continue to post excessively after one Time Out, you may be given a second Time Out which will last eight weeks. There is no third Time Out - it is a permanent ban. The purpose of a Time Out is to encourage you to seek the face-to-face help we cannot provide on this forum.

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: was i at risk?
« Reply #6 on: July 06, 2009, 06:33:37 PM »
We're not interested in the what ifs and other speculations you and your fears may come up with. We deal with what happened.

You had protected intercourse. There is no cause for further concern about this incident. PERIOD.

Get on with your life. 
Andy Velez

Offline howie

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Re: was i at risk?
« Reply #7 on: September 08, 2009, 11:37:41 AM »
hi. i'm back. in a few weeks i will be having myself tested again for hiv. it will be my second. the first was in june. it was a rapid testing.

my question is i just learned that the kit they used was 85% accurate. now, i am scared that my result was a false negative. could that be possible? it was always on my mind that when you test negative there is no possibility that it is negative. that is why when you test positive, they take another blood sample for confirmatory tests because the positive result may have been false.

please clear this up for me. im scared.

Offline RapidRod

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Re: was i at risk?
« Reply #8 on: September 08, 2009, 12:18:37 PM »
Reread the replies you've been given, at no time were you at risk nor did you need any testing.

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: was i at risk?
« Reply #9 on: September 08, 2009, 02:45:20 PM »
As long as a test is done at the appropriate time a negative is a negative. The problem with testing is the occasional false positive or someone testing too early for a reliable result.

In your case all of the above are irrelevant because you didn't have a risk to begin with. So testing for you is strictly for your peace of mind and not because there was a real risk. Obviously testing has only stirred up more doubts and fears on your part.

There really is nothing more we can tell you beyond that you didn't have a risk and testing is not necessary.
Andy Velez

Offline howie

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Re: was i at risk?
« Reply #10 on: February 13, 2010, 11:20:43 PM »
hi. i performed oral sex on a man and he was a bit rough especially when he wanted to deep throat. Within the duration of oral sex I take a break to spit and gargle water. I noticed that there was blood (only once - i took a break 4-5x). Is there reason to worry? Should I get myself tested in 3 months?

I know hiv transmission in oral sex is only theoretical.  I'm just scared because I bled. Also, he came in my mouth but I didn't swallow.

Please help.

Thanks.

Offline Ann

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Re: was i at risk?
« Reply #11 on: February 14, 2010, 05:28:16 AM »
Howie,

As you know, giving oral is only a theoretical risk. It's totally up to you whether or not you test over this. And yes, I saw the bit where you mentioned blood. The mouth is a very inhospitable environment for hiv, whether or not there's a tiny bit of blood present.

Anyone who is sexually active should be testing for ALL STIs at least once a year, so if you do go test, make sure you're testing for everything as part of your yearly check-up. I hope you're aware that you're much more likely to end up with oral gonorrhea than you are to end up with hiv through giving blowjobs. Gonorrhea doesn't always have symptoms no matter where in the body it is, so get checked.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline howie

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Re: was i at risk?
« Reply #12 on: February 15, 2010, 07:16:17 PM »
thanks ann. i appreciate your reply.

one more thing though. this is more for my peace of mind. it doesn't really matter if i spit or swallow or let it stay in the mouth for a few seconds right? i was still not at risk?

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: was i at risk?
« Reply #13 on: February 15, 2010, 07:21:14 PM »
That's right. Still not a risk.

But you're worried enough about it so that I guess testing and getting the inevitable negative result maybe what you need to let go of this concern and move on.

And yes, I expect you will test negative.
Andy Velez

Offline howie

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Re: was i at risk?
« Reply #14 on: November 06, 2012, 06:26:43 PM »
hi andy. i bottomed to 2 different guys in march and october this year. i am 100% sure they we wearing condoms. after ejaculating and pulling out i took a look at the c0ndom when it was still on them and i am 100% sure the tip was intact and the semen was safely inside the condom. im sure they did not remove and slip the condom back on the entire time we were having sex. is there any possibility i could be infected? im getting paranoid as im into 3 weeks after i last bottomed and i have this sore in my gums.

thank you.

Offline jkinatl2

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Re: was i at risk?
« Reply #15 on: November 06, 2012, 08:19:37 PM »
hi andy. i bottomed to 2 different guys in march and october this year. i am 100% sure they we wearing condoms. after ejaculating and pulling out i took a look at the c0ndom when it was still on them and i am 100% sure the tip was intact and the semen was safely inside the condom. im sure they did not remove and slip the condom back on the entire time we were having sex. is there any possibility i could be infected? im getting paranoid as im into 3 weeks after i last bottomed and i have this sore in my gums.

thank you.

You just described protected sex, and there is not a risk of HIV infection from protected sex.

"Many people, especially in the gay community, turn to oral sex as a safer alternative in the age of AIDS. And with HIV rates rising, people need to remember that oral sex is safer sex. It's a reasonable alternative."

-Kimberly Page-Shafer, PhD, MPH

Welcome Thread

Offline howie

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Re: was i at risk?
« Reply #16 on: November 08, 2012, 05:29:10 AM »
is there a possibility i could be infected due to cuts on the base of the insertive partner's penis? I read from another post that what's important is the head of the penis was covered but that was for heterosexual sex. Does that apply to homosexual sex too?

thanks.

Offline Ann

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Re: was i at risk?
« Reply #17 on: November 08, 2012, 07:06:53 AM »
Howie,

When it comes to gay sex and condom usage, the ONLY difference is the fact that you must make sure there is plenty of lube being used. The vagina produces its own lubricant while the anus doesn't (at least not in enough quantities). Even with vaginal intercourse plenty of lube is still recommended, but lube is absolutely crucial when it comes to anal.

You're worrying unnecessarily when it comes to cuts on the base of the penis, whether it's the top or bottom's penis.

Use condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, correctly and consistently, and you will avoid hiv infection. IT REALLY IS THAT SIMPLE!!!

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline howie

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Re: was i at risk?
« Reply #18 on: November 11, 2012, 08:47:13 AM »
to clarify. this means i wasnt at risk since the condom was intact and the head of the penis was covered the entire time. right?

my apologies for being such a pain. i had muscle pains and lbm and canker sore 2-3 weeks after my last sex and its making me a bit paranoid.

thank you.

Offline Ann

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Re: was i at risk?
« Reply #19 on: November 11, 2012, 10:33:48 AM »
Howie,

You weren't at risk. End of story.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline howie

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Re: was i at risk?
« Reply #20 on: March 17, 2014, 06:56:26 PM »
Hi!

I know this in question is incredibly stupid but I'll throw it your way still. I recently went to a gay sauna/bathhouse and used the toilet bidet. I inserted the nozzle up my anus. Is it possible that I can get infected by HIV by that action?

Thank you.

Offline Jeff G

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Re: was i at risk?
« Reply #21 on: March 17, 2014, 07:04:44 PM »
Hi!

I know this in question is incredibly stupid but I'll throw it your way still. I recently went to a gay sauna/bathhouse and used the toilet bidet. I inserted the nozzle up my anus. Is it possible that I can get infected by HIV by that action?

Thank you.

No it was not a risk ... you cant get HIV off environmental surfaces . You have been around here long enough to know that only unprotected anal and vaginal sex and sharing IV drug injection rigs are a risk for HIV so don't get started asking questions you know the answers too or has been already addressed . 

 


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