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Author Topic: Worried about HIV  (Read 11963 times)

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Offline ilovewomen

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Worried about HIV
« on: June 27, 2009, 02:02:12 PM »
I have had a couple of incidents over the last 6 months. I am going to list them to get an idea of whether I should be tested for HIV / I was at risk

1) Last august I got a protected blowjob from a female of unknown status. I tested the oral swab test in October and it came out negative. How reliable is the oral swab test and since I got this done 2 months after exposure, should I get tested again related to this incident?

2) I was at a massage parlor sometime in January / February and during the massage, the masseuse stuck her finger up my ass. I felt her nail or something like that poking. If there were cuts in her finger, could she have infected me when sticking her finger inside me? Could she have cut me with her nails when inserting and could there have been exchange of blood to cause HIV?

3) I was at a different massage parlor and after the massage, I kissed the female's vagina. I did not stick my finger deep inside, but the outside was kind of wet and I licked it for about 15 to 20 seconds. I did not lick more than that but I think there was definitely some fluid. I just rubbed the outside with my finger for sometime. Can I get HIV through licking her vagina?

4) I was at the same massage parlor and with a different female, I ended up licking her ass for about 15-20 seconds. I did touch her ass with my finger and finger went in a little, just a little when she stopped. I just got a handjob from her after that. Do I have HIV risk from licking her ass?

5) I was at a strip club once and during the lap dance, I ended up kissing the stripper. It was a pretty deep kiss and there was definitely tongue exchange. I have this habit of biting my lip and not sure if my lips would have been bleeding at that time. The kissing was prolonged and lasted for about 5-8 minutes. I know saliva inhibits HIV, but what about lips. What if there was blood in my lips and somehow she had some blood in her mouth. Can I get HIV from this exposure?

I have just been freaking out about getting HIV. I ended up getting cellulitis on my feet and the doctor told me I might have got it because of weakened immune system. I read about cellulitis online and they said HIV can cause one's immune system to weaken and thereby cause cellulitis. I am extremely worried that I have HIV. I have not been sleeping properly for days thinking that I might have gotten HIV. Please give me answers for my exposure. I would like to know if there is any chance I might have gotten HIV from my exposure. 

Offline RapidRod

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Re: Worried about HIV
« Reply #1 on: June 27, 2009, 03:20:57 PM »
Not one of the situations your have mentioned was a risk of contracting HIV.

Online Andy Velez

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Re: Worried about HIV
« Reply #2 on: June 27, 2009, 04:16:31 PM »
Read our lesson on Transmission. There's a link to it in the welcome thread which opens this section. It covers the basics.

You'll see that nothing you have reported represented any kind of a possible risk for HIV transmission.

It's really very simple. Use condoms everytime for vaginal or anal intercourse and you will be well protected for sexual transmission of HIV. Yes, it really is just that simple.

Andy Velez

Offline ilovewomen

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Re: Worried about HIV
« Reply #3 on: June 27, 2009, 04:34:56 PM »
Thanks. I read the transmission lessons. It mentions the following about Oral Vaginal Sex
"However, there have been case reports highlighting one case of female-to-female transmission of HIV via cunnilingus and another case of female-to-male transmission of HIV via cunnilingus. Both of these cases involved transmission from receptive partner (the one receiving oral sex) to the insertive partner (the one performing oral sex). There haven't been any documented cases of HIV transmission from the insertive partner to the receptive partner."

Since I performed the licking, does that put me at risk? Also, why doesnt kissing transmit HIV if the contact is just lip to lip (without saliva)...If both lips are bleeding, wont that cause HIV?

Thank you for your time and patience.

Offline Ann

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Re: Worried about HIV
« Reply #4 on: June 27, 2009, 05:27:09 PM »
ILW,

TWO cases of suspected  oral transmission from cunnilingus in over 25 years of this pandemic and you're worried? Forget about it. Going down on a woman is NOT a risk for hiv transmission. In those two cases, other risk factors were involved - namely unprotected intercourse with someone. The only reason they ever got reported was because the person who was infected thought  they knew where their infection came from. They were wrong.

Hiv transmission doesn't stand a chance of happening via female genitals to mouth - there are just too many obstacles on the oral route.

The first obstacle is the mouth itself. The mouth is a veritable fortress, standing against all sorts of pathogens we come into contact with every minute of our lives. It's a very hostile environment and saliva has been shown to contain over a dozen different proteins and enzymes that damage hiv.

Hiv is a very fragile virus - literally. Its outer surface doesn't take kindly to changes in its preferred environment; slight changes in temperature, moisture content and pH levels all damage the outer surface. Importantly, it needs this outer surface to be intact before it can latch onto a few, very specific cell types and infect. 

Which leads to the second obstacle. Hiv can only latch onto certain types of cells, cells which are not found in abundance in the mouth.

The third obstacle to transmission this way is having hiv present in the first place. The female secretion where hiv has been shown to be present is the cervicovaginal fluid. This fluid is actually a thick mucus that covers and protects the cervix.

The fluid a woman produces when sexually excited comes from glands located on either side of the vaginal opening. I have yet to discover one shred of evidence (and believe me, I've looked) that shows this lubricating fluid to have any more hiv present than other bodily secretions such as saliva, sweat or tears. Saliva, sweat and tears are NOT infectious fluids.

So there you have it. Once the results of the serodiscordant studies started rolling in, what we know about hiv transmission on the cellular level was validated. The only people who were getting infected were those who had unprotected anal or vaginal intercourse. Period. One of the three studies went on for ten years and involved hundreds of couples. That's a lot of nookie.

Nothing you did or had done to you was a risk for hiv infection.

You need to be using condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, every time, no exceptions until such time as you are in a securely monogamous relationship where you have both tested for ALL sexually transmitted infections together. To agree to have unprotected intercourse is to consent to the possibility of being infected with an STI. Sex without a condom lasts only a matter of minutes, but hiv is forever.

Have a look through all three condom and lube links in my signature line so you can use condoms with confidence.

ALTHOUGH YOU DO NOT NEED TO TEST OVER ANY OF THE SPECIFIC ACTIVITIES YOU BRING TO US, anyone who is sexually active should be having a full sexual health care check-up, including but not limited to hiv testing, at least once a year and more often if unprotected intercourse occurs.

If you aren't already having regular, routine check-ups, now is the time to start. As long as you make sure condoms are being used for intercourse, you can fully expect your routine hiv tests to return with negative results. Don't forget to always get checked for all the other sexually transmitted infections as well, because they are MUCH easier to transmit than hiv.

Use condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, correctly and consistently, and you will avoid hiv infection. It really is that simple!

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

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"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline ilovewomen

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Re: Worried about HIV
« Reply #5 on: June 27, 2009, 05:51:26 PM »
Thanks for such a detailed reply. I guess I got scared much more after I got cellulitis on my legs and doctor told me that my immune system may have become weak. If I test now based on the incidents that I have mentioned, is there any chance I could still be positive? (Last question)

Online Andy Velez

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Re: Worried about HIV
« Reply #6 on: June 27, 2009, 05:57:40 PM »
Could you test positive? Sure you could. But that's only because theoretically anytime you have sex with other than your own hand you are THEORETICALLY at risk for HIV transmission.

Nothing you are reporting including cellulitis and a possibly weakened immune systeme are HIV specific events.

And yes, I expect you to test negative.
Andy Velez

Offline ilovewomen

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Re: Worried about HIV
« Reply #7 on: June 27, 2009, 06:02:29 PM »
thanks you guys

Offline Ann

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Re: Worried about HIV
« Reply #8 on: June 27, 2009, 06:04:32 PM »
ILW,

You only have a chance of testing positive is you've been having unprotected intercourse that you haven't told us about, or have been sharing street drug injecting equipment with anyone. Otherwise, you're not going to test positive. Nothing you've brought to us has been a risk.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline ilovewomen

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Re: Worried about HIV
« Reply #9 on: June 27, 2009, 07:53:30 PM »
Thanks Ann....I have pretty much written every exposure I have had..If I am not going to be honest in an anonymous forum and skip things then I have a lot to lose....Thanks for your answers and assurance.

Offline ilovewomen

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Re: Worried about HIV
« Reply #10 on: July 10, 2009, 09:37:48 PM »
I decided to do testing. I am freaking out. I thought my immune system problems would go away, but they still keep coming. I purchased the home access kit and sent my sample. I am really tensed up now. Is there any way I could test positive based on the incidents I have mentioned? I am just totally freaking out. I need to wait till monday for the results.

Online Andy Velez

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Re: Worried about HIV
« Reply #11 on: July 10, 2009, 10:12:32 PM »
You need to get busy with other things for the next few days. And don't bother saying you're too worried to do that. That response is not going to fly here.

As Ann has told you, as long as you have reported accurately here then there is no reason to doubt that you will test negative, no matter what your mind says to the contrary.

Now, get on with other things and lay off of all this drama. Really.
Andy Velez

Offline HIVworker

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Re: Worried about HIV
« Reply #12 on: July 11, 2009, 01:55:35 PM »
I opened this thread to see if I could help with an answer to HIV exposure, but it seems all has been covered by RapidRod's first reply.

I myself came to the same conclusion when I read each of your accounts before I even read Rapid's reply. Why should it be amazing that four people (myself, Ann, RapidRod and Andy) came to the same conclusion that there is nothing here that would put you at a serious risk of getting HIV? Because it's the truth.

I guess the only thing I wanted to add is that if HIV is such a worry for you, it might be a good idea to adjust your sexual activities so you don't put yourself at risk of worrying about it? I mean if you worry about HIV doing the things you mention, maybe you shouldn't do them in that way, or at least consider another method of satisfying your sexual desires? If having sexual contact with people leads to you worrying this much, maybe it is time to reconsider how you do it?

Your HIV test will almost certainly come out negative, but I would try and rethink what you do if it leads to you worrying that much.

R
NB. Any advice about HIV is given in addition to your own medical advice and not intended to replace it. You should never make clinical decisions based on what anyone says on the internet but rather check with your ID doctor first. Discussions from the internet are just that - Discussions. They may give you food for thought, but they should not direct you to do anything but fuel discussion.

Offline ilovewomen

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Re: Worried about HIV
« Reply #13 on: July 13, 2009, 08:39:28 PM »
Thanks for posting this. I know, I think I need to reconsider my lifestyle. I have definitely been losing sleep over the last couple of months and I am stressed out. I just got my Home Access Results and it was negative. Thanks for the reassurance.

Offline ilovewomen

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Re: Worried about HIV
« Reply #14 on: October 29, 2009, 08:08:31 PM »
Hi. Its been a long time since I posted a question here. I did not have any specific incident or exposure but rather came across an interesting discussion in one of the other sites and thought will ask you guys.

The discussion was about HIV and fingering. As you guys say unprotected vaginal and anal sex is the root cause of HIV with more risks via Anal than Vaginal. Also, HIV is transmitted inside the body (inside vagina / anus). The discussion was, what is the difference if someone puts his finger in a anus to putting his penis inside an anus. Let's assume that there is a cut in the finger. If there is a cut in the finger, in what way is putting a finger into an Anus different from putting a penis into an anus. Both are inside the body and both have a route for transmission right.

I know that the answer is only vaginal and anal sex, but the curiosity in me wants to know the reason why digital anal is not a risk (assuming there is a cut in the finger) and finger is shoved in deep enough. Thanks for taking the time to read and answer this.

Offline pos2007

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Re: Worried about HIV
« Reply #15 on: October 29, 2009, 09:38:28 PM »
If  you are getting  negative test results,  you  haven't acquired any HIV.  As far as a cut  finger,  what  percentage  of  people  running around  in  the  public at large  have  cut  fingers?  a very,  very,  small number.  Even  if  they  did  have a cut,  It  would  have  to be  bleeding  or weeping for  the virus to  leak  out  of  them  assuming  they  were positive  in  the  first place.  Then  on  top  of  that you  would   have to  get an  anal tear of  some  sort for  the  virus  to  enter  your  body.  There are  many  on  these  forums  that  have  had  unprotected anal  insertive male on male sex  for  years  before the became  infected.  Some   Have been infected  in short  order,  but  infection does  not instantly  happen in every  case.  Nearly  10 years went  by  before I  became  infected  from my  wife. You  have  a much  higher  chance  of  getting another  STD than  HIV.  Get tested  for  all  the  STD's,  be  safe  and  kick   back  and  relax.   As long as  you neg,  &  2  are  safe  from  now  on  out,  you  should   have  nothing  to  worry  about.   A  lot  of  things  can  produce a poor  immune response.  pregnancy,  allergies,  lupis,   the  list  goes  on.  I am  sure  your  doctor  has  checked.
Diagnosed  CD4 138 VL. 38,000
Partner Diagnosed CD4 <20  VL.  488,000

Offline ilovewomen

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Re: Worried about HIV
« Reply #16 on: October 29, 2009, 10:07:34 PM »
Thanks for the reply. So what you are saying is the finger has to be bleeding at that time (it has to be a fresh cut) and there has to be bleeding in the ass at the same time. But if both those things are there, then it is possible for HIV to be transmitted that way? I am just trying to ascertain if HIV can be acquired through the finger (for the person inserting it). So if the finger is bleeding then there is no difference between putting a penis into the anus and finger into the anus?

Online Andy Velez

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Re: Worried about HIV
« Reply #17 on: October 30, 2009, 08:18:47 AM »
We're not interested in "interesting discussions." We focus here on specific incidents and evaluate them for risk or non-risk.

Fingering is not a risk for HIV transmission. I've never known of a single confirmed case of transmission through that quite common sexual activity.
Andy Velez

Offline ilovewomen

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Re: Worried about HIV
« Reply #18 on: November 08, 2009, 07:46:15 PM »
ok...I stuck my finger up a woman's ass. I had a cut on my finger. It was a very small cut and was definitely red and I could see some blood with open skin. It wasnt bleeding at that time, but there definitely was a cut, no doubt. I inserted it inside this woman's ass for at least 10 minutes. Not very deep, but definitely not just the rim. I inserted it inside(maybe deep enough). Since my finger had a cut, what are my chances of contacting HIV this way.

Offline pos2007

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Re: Worried about HIV
« Reply #19 on: November 08, 2009, 08:08:50 PM »
It  has been  5  months  since  you  first presented  the  question.  That  has been   several times   over  ample  time  for  you to  have produced  antibodies indicative  of  HIV  presence in  your blood  if  HIV  were present.   If  you  test  negative,  then  you  are  negative.  You  have  to  remember,    she  would  have  had  to  have  been  bleeding  rectally  also  for  your  hypothesis  to give  even  a small chance.  Have a quick  test at  your county  health  clinic and  then get  on  with  your  life  safely.  Don't  take any  risks  and  live negative  to a very  ripe  old  age with  a big  smile  on your face.  ;)
Diagnosed  CD4 138 VL. 38,000
Partner Diagnosed CD4 <20  VL.  488,000

Offline ilovewomen

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Re: Worried about HIV
« Reply #20 on: November 08, 2009, 10:32:22 PM »
well..it not the same old incident...this time its a new incident....and this time i had my finger in her ass for a long time.....that's why i am worried.

Offline ilovewomen

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Re: Worried about HIV
« Reply #21 on: November 09, 2009, 08:11:30 AM »
So if she was bleeding rectally, do you mean bleeding profusely or having small tears that have some blood present. Please let me know what are my chances of getting HIV if she was bleeding rectally and since i had a small cut in my finger.

Offline Ann

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Re: Worried about HIV
« Reply #22 on: November 09, 2009, 08:23:03 AM »
pos2007, you are not permitted to post in this forum.


If you read the Welcome Thread before posting like you're supposed to, you will have read the following posting guideline:

Quote

Only those Moderators and members who are authorized to answer questions in the Am I Infected? forum are permitted do so. Unauthorized responses may be deleted without permission of the poster. Repeatedly posting replies of this nature may result in a Time Out or permanent ban, at the discretion of the Moderator Team.


Please consider yourself warned!

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline Ann

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Re: Worried about HIV
« Reply #23 on: November 09, 2009, 08:25:47 AM »
ilw,

I'm sorry an unauthorised poster managed to come in and reply to your question. His advice is wrong. Not one person has ever been infected through fingering and you are not going to be the first. Hiv can only infect a very few, very specific types of cells and these cells are not found in the upper layers of the skin. You didn't have a risk with this fingering incident, just like your other fingering incident. Fingering is fingering and fingering is NOT a risk for hiv infection. End of story.

Re-read your entire thread. Our answers are not going to change.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline ilovewomen

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Re: Worried about HIV
« Reply #24 on: November 11, 2009, 08:26:47 PM »
I understand that the skin on the finger is different compared to the skin on the tip of a penis or any mucuos membrane. But what I dont understand is how can we discount the presence of blood or a fresh cut on the finger?

Online Andy Velez

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Re: Worried about HIV
« Reply #25 on: November 12, 2009, 08:01:15 AM »
Are you bothering to actually read what is said to you? Ann has specifically commented on the nature of the skin on your finger and why it is not a means for transmission. 
Andy Velez

Offline ilovewomen

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Re: Worried about HIV
« Reply #26 on: December 02, 2009, 08:42:10 PM »
If nature of skin does not cause the virus to be transmitted, then why is it still considered a theoritical risk. Even if there are cuts, if the nature of skin prevents the transmission of HIV, then shouldnt fingering be considered a no risk activity. I dont mean to argue, but just trying to understand how it can be ruled out completely.

Offline RapidRod

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Re: Worried about HIV
« Reply #27 on: December 02, 2009, 08:58:01 PM »
Anyone who continues to post excessively, questioning a conclusive negative result or no-risk situation, will be subject to a four week Time Out (a temporary ban from the Forums). If you continue to post excessively after one Time Out, you may be given a second Time Out which will last eight weeks. There is no third Time Out - it is a permanent ban. The purpose of a Time Out is to encourage you to seek the face-to-face help we cannot provide on this forum.

Offline Ann

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Re: Worried about HIV
« Reply #28 on: December 02, 2009, 09:02:28 PM »
ILW,

Finger is NOT considered a theoretical risk, it's considered NO RISK. As you've been repeatedly told.

f you read the Welcome Thread before posting like you're supposed to, you will have read the following posting guideline:

Quote

Anyone who continues to post excessively, questioning a conclusive negative result or no-risk situation, will be subject to a four week Time Out (a temporary ban from the Forums). If you continue to post excessively after one Time Out, you may be given a second Time Out which will last eight weeks. There is no third Time Out - it is a permanent ban. The purpose of a Time Out is to encourage you to seek the face-to-face help we cannot provide on this forum.


Please consider yourself warned!

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

 


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