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Author Topic: Need testing...paranoid!  (Read 4044 times)

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Offline eagleyes

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Need testing...paranoid!
« on: April 28, 2009, 10:56:26 AM »
Hi Folks,

OK, so i am one of the worried fellows trawling the net for doomsday information on my situation. Here it goes....I am married, never had any sexual relation outside of it.

Recently, my friends took me to a massage parlour and i got carried away. The following happened during the episode:

1. The lady put her hands inside her panties to remove them, I stopped her
2. She rubbed her nipples against my bare penis (no condom am circumcised)
3. I sucked her nipples for a few minutes
4. She gave me a handjob

Later, when I pressed her breasts, I realised she was lactating. I freaked out and have been, since the episode 30 days back. I am worried about the following (all assuming she was HIV+, ofcourse):

1. What if the hand she used to masturbate me had some vaginal fluid?
2. What if I have injested some breast milk?
3. What if the breast milk had contact with the tip of my penis when she rubbed her nipples against it?

There was no oral or penetrative sex and no kissing. I have posted on medhelp and doctor advised no tests for me and said this was basically a 'no risk' situation. I however, out of sheer paranoia have done the following:

1. Met 3 doctors in reputed hospitals in my city
2. Went in for the 4th gen HIV Duo tests on day 21 and day 28 of the episode - both were negative, even spoke to the lab director and he asked me to forget the episode.

All doctors I spoke to say I had low to zero risk. I am however anxious (less than before, but still anxious). Was hoping this forum helped me in understanding my risks and whether I need to test again at 6 weeks or should I forget this episode and get on with my life.

Just for information, I have since levelled with my wife and she has been understanding and supportive.

Online RapidRod

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Re: Need testing...paranoid!
« Reply #1 on: April 28, 2009, 11:11:25 AM »
You didn't have a risk of contracting HIV.

Offline eagleyes

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Re: Need testing...paranoid!
« Reply #2 on: April 28, 2009, 11:23:23 AM »
RapidRod....are you posting as 'Teak' on medhelp by any chance?

Online RapidRod

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Re: Need testing...paranoid!
« Reply #3 on: April 28, 2009, 11:25:13 AM »
Yes and it's common knowledge.

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: Need testing...paranoid!
« Reply #4 on: April 28, 2009, 02:51:22 PM »
The only confirmed risks for HIV transmission sexually are through unprotected vaginal and anal intercourse. Everything else, including everything you're worrying yourself about are non-risks.

And you are trawling the net to worry yourself because? All to no good purpose. You did what you did and feeling guilty isn't going to change anything. Do yourself and your marriage a big favor, take a breath, accept what you did, let it go and get on with your life.

No risk, no need for testing. Oh, And do yourself a really big favor and stop trawling the net. Nothing good will come from continuing to do that.

Cheers.
Andy Velez

Offline eagleyes

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Re: Need testing...paranoid!
« Reply #5 on: April 28, 2009, 11:06:02 PM »
Hi Andy,

Thanks for the response. I understand my feelings of guilt are getting to me. I however, have a couple of questions for you and maybe Ann if she would be kind to reply:

1. Is rubbing the lady's nipples with my penis really no risk? What if there was some contact with the tip of my penis and her breast secretions?

2. In India (where I live), most doctors I met (all MDs) almost dubbed this as a very low risk situation and said a Duo test at 3 and 4 weeks was sufficient. There are conflicting reports on the internet over the accuracy of the duo and I would like to know some facts. Am I correct about the following:

A. P24 antigen is a specific protein to HIV and is typically detectable within 10-28 days (heard it peaks at 16 days or so) after primary infection.

B. The body produces antibodies to this particular protein which then (in a majority of people) get detectable by 4-6 weeks.

So, as a corollary to the above, my 3rd and 4th week combined assays should be fairly accurate, isn't it?  However, I am also aware of the CDCs guideline of 13 weeks and the fact that you would stick to that, however, could someone help me with my understanding of the duo and where I stand?

I will complete 5 weeks tomorrow from exposure, does it really make sense to go in for a test again?

And finally, I have been abstaining from sex with my wife, would it be absolutely safe to resume?

Thanks folks for a wonderful job you are doing.

Online RapidRod

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Re: Need testing...paranoid!
« Reply #6 on: April 28, 2009, 11:11:00 PM »
Anyone who continues to post excessively, questioning a conclusive negative result or no-risk situation, will be subject to a four week Time Out (a temporary ban from the Forums). If you continue to post excessively after one Time Out, you may be given a second Time Out which will last eight weeks. There is no third Time Out - it is a permanent ban. The purpose of a Time Out is to encourage you to seek the face-to-face help we cannot provide on this forum.

Offline eagleyes

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Re: Need testing...paranoid!
« Reply #7 on: April 28, 2009, 11:46:56 PM »
Hi,

I don't think this is fair Rapid rod (or teak or whoever), I have seen posts which are far more anxiety driven than mine on this forum.

I believe I have asked a reasonable question and one which many people would have in mind given the nature of this disease and the fact that 4th generation assays have been descirbed in being better at detecting earlier infections. Common sense suggests that anyone with or without anxiety would like to know of their status as soon as possible and if there is scientific evidence that supports such a test, many would like to know about it. Warning me for for this post not only seems grossly unfai but also prejudiced.

Online RapidRod

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Re: Need testing...paranoid!
« Reply #8 on: April 29, 2009, 12:04:41 AM »
What part of no risk is it that you don't understand? We are not councilors for your anxiety over a non risk guilt issue.

Offline eagleyes

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Re: Need testing...paranoid!
« Reply #9 on: April 29, 2009, 03:46:54 AM »
could someone please help with my queries?

Offline anniebc

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Re: Need testing...paranoid!
« Reply #10 on: April 29, 2009, 03:59:42 AM »
could someone please help with my queries?

Rod and Andy have already helped you out..what more do you want?

You didn't have a risk, everything you have said and worried about are all NON - RISK situations..please read the lessons here about how HIV is and is not transmitted and then it's time to move on.

Jan

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Offline eagleyes

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Re: Need testing...paranoid!
« Reply #11 on: April 29, 2009, 04:13:56 AM »
 help on my understanding of my tests

Offline Ann

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Re: Need testing...paranoid!
« Reply #12 on: April 29, 2009, 06:03:10 AM »
eagle,

You did not have even the remotest risk for hiv infection in anything you did or had done to you at the strip club. You don't need testing.

If you read the Welcome Thread before posting like you're supposed to, you would have seen  and read the Testing Lesson linked to there. I'm sorry, but I'm not going to spend my time on your NO RISK situation by giving you a detailed explanation of p24 testing - testing that you DO NOT NEED. Go read the lesson.

And get on with your life. You didn't have a risk. Keep posting about this NO RISK situation and you'll be given that time out Rodney warned you about.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline eagleyes

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Re: Need testing...paranoid!
« Reply #13 on: April 29, 2009, 07:11:45 AM »
hi ann, i have read other posts by you and am taken aback by your rather curt reply. I just wanted to get a view on the breast secretions getting into my penis when she rubbed he nipples with my penis ?

Offline Ann

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Re: Need testing...paranoid!
« Reply #14 on: April 29, 2009, 07:36:24 AM »
eagle,

Breast secretions hold no danger to you, no matter where you rub the secretions. Breast milk is ONLY dangerous to infants. I trust you're not an infant?

NO RISK. It's time you got on with your life.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline eagleyes

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Re: Need testing...paranoid!
« Reply #15 on: May 03, 2009, 01:10:43 AM »
Hello,

At the risk of getting a time out, I need to add something. After going through many posts on this forum, I understand you guys essentially work on the 'practical' and documented risks of HIV and not the theoretical (aka meteorite hit) risks. However, you still recommend a '3 month' window period for testing despite new generation assays being available and a host of doctors including the massachusets govt. advising a 6 week test. Just wanted to understand why

Offline anniebc

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Re: Need testing...paranoid!
« Reply #16 on: May 03, 2009, 02:26:45 AM »

Quote
However, you still recommend a '3 month' window period for testing despite new generation assays being available and a host of doctors including the massachusets govt. advising a 6 week test. Just wanted to understand why

I personally haven't heard about this, but most tests at 6 weeks will give you a fairly good result, but I wouldn't depend on this and this alone, most people who have become infected will have developed antibodies at this time..but a minority of people could take longer to develope antibodies, so to be on the safe side we still recommend testing up to 3 months.

Just remember we are here to help you if you have had a risky situation we are not here to argue with you, if you don't like the advise we give them maybe you can find it elsewhere.

You haven't had a risk so there is nothing more we can tell you or help you with..as Ann said it's time to move on.

Jan
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Online RapidRod

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Re: Need testing...paranoid!
« Reply #17 on: May 03, 2009, 02:43:10 AM »
Seek professional mental help. You were never at risk of contracting HIV and have been told not only here but on Medhelp and Dr. Hook told you, "I will repeat what your doctor has already told you - there was no risk at all from the exposure that you describe." Move on.

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: Need testing...paranoid!
« Reply #18 on: May 03, 2009, 08:57:08 AM »
More sensitive tests are available which can deliver reliable answers. However, they are not available everywhere.

So until such tests are universally available we are following the recommendation of the CDC, which is for testing at 13 weeks. At that point all generations of tests available will yield a reliable result.
Andy Velez

Offline eagleyes

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Re: Need testing...paranoid!
« Reply #19 on: May 05, 2009, 06:32:38 AM »
Hi Andy,

Thanks. One reply that made sense as far as the tests go. Just like to add that I took a 40 day (~6 week) test today and tested negative on HIV 1/2 and P24 antigen.

By the way, these tests are available in quite a few labs in Mumbai, India. In developed countries like the US (where health budgets might be huge and delivery mechanisms more reliable), I am surprised these are not standard. Also, another question I have is what happens in case of donated blood? What if the donor is in window period? Do all hospitals in the US use NAT (PCR I presume) to test and if so, why is it not an approved test for diagnosis in normal individuals

Aside Rapid Rod - I am already seeking counsel for my anxiety.

Online RapidRod

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Re: Need testing...paranoid!
« Reply #20 on: May 05, 2009, 06:41:13 AM »
Blood banks are safe and have been since 1985. All blood donations are tested multiple times before they are released to be used. Now move on.

Offline eagleyes

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Re: Need testing...paranoid!
« Reply #21 on: May 05, 2009, 08:41:55 AM »
Blood banks are safe and have been since 1985. All blood donations are tested multiple times before they are released to be used. Now move on.

I know that already, thanks! My question was regarding the tests that they use. Whether 'once' or 'multiple' times

Online RapidRod

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Re: Need testing...paranoid!
« Reply #22 on: May 05, 2009, 08:48:02 AM »
You have been given your WARNING so expect a time out.

Offline eagleyes

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Re: Need testing...paranoid!
« Reply #23 on: November 04, 2009, 09:56:11 AM »
Ladies and Gentlemen,

Am trying to post in my original thread....hope I have succeeded. Need your advise on the following:

We were partying away at a bachelor’s do in Mumbai, India at a pretty shady bar, with ‘available’ waitresses (possibly CSWs in disguise – high risk).

A couple of waitresses were playing with us and drinking from our soft drink bottles. We were sitting on the ground with seemingly dirty mattresses (that most probably had been used for sex). The girl had just visited the restroom before this.

I was completely clothed (trousers, underwear, shirt and vest) and the girl was clothed too, albeit skimpily. So, basically, she massaged my penis. I kept feebly trying to take her hand off, but the dawg in me took over and I had an orgasm inside my pants (yuck....I know)

I tried to check her hands to see if I could see any fluid or blood but I could not as she sort of felt I was being weird and walked away.

I understand all these were no risk activities. Just wanted a corroboration, assuming theoretical risks as well:

1. Any risk of HIV / STD from clothing, even if she had some urine / blood / vaginal fluids on her hands? Even theoretical risk?
2. Any risk from the soiled mattress if it had semen / vaginal fluid from a previous romp immediately before?
3. I had an apthous ulcer on my lip and am worried if a kiss on the neck or cheek could be a risk?
4. Could the fact that the waitresses were drinking from the same bottles as us put me at any risk, especially with my ulcer? Even if they had sores / cuts in their mouths?
5. Any conceivable risk at all from this bachelor party for HIV / other STDs? Would you classify all of the above as ‘casual contact’ / ‘Environmental contact’?

Basically, as long as I do not have penetrative sex (oral, vaginal or anal), do not do IV drugs and do not face occupational exposure, I do not need to worry about HIV / any other STD, right?

Offline eagleyes

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Re: Need testing...paranoid!
« Reply #24 on: November 04, 2009, 09:59:24 AM »
Not sure if it is clear from my previous post, but she rubbed my penis over my trousers (and underwear)

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: Need testing...paranoid!
« Reply #25 on: November 04, 2009, 10:20:40 AM »
Once again you are worrying needlessly. There was absolutely no risk for HIV transmission in the incident that you have mentioned.

This looks to be again to be about guilt for having strayed, much the same as the previous occasion on which you worked yourself into a state over a no risk incident.

Give it up and get on with your life.
Andy Velez

Offline Ann

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Re: Need testing...paranoid!
« Reply #26 on: November 04, 2009, 10:42:04 AM »

(possibly CSWs in disguise – high risk).


Eagle,

You need to understand that PEOPLE are not high, low or no risk, ACTIVITIES are high, low or no risk. Sexually speaking, the ONLY true risks are unprotected anal or vaginal intercourse. It doesn't matter WHO you have sexual relations with, what matters is HOW you do it. Use condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, correctly and consistently, and you will avoid hiv infection. It really is that simple!

1. No. Hiv is not transmitted from objects in the environment.

2. No. Hiv is not transmitted from objects in the environment.

3. No. Hiv is not transmitted through skin to skin contact as hiv is not present on the skin. It's present in blood and some genital fluids.

4. Sharing cups, plates or other eating/drinking utensils is NOT a risk for hiv infection, regardless of anyone having cuts or ulcers or whatever in their mouth or on their lips. Hiv is not transmitted from objects in the environment!

5. NO. Hiv and other STIs are not transmitted through casual contact or environmental contact.

This is all basic information, information you should have learned by now during your time on this website. Re-read your entire thread and re-read the Welcome Thread and the links contained there. If you keep coming back with these no risk situations, you'll be given a time out.

Use condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, correctly and consistently, and you will avoid hiv infection. IT REALLY IS THAT SIMPLE!!!

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

 


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