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Author Topic: Any one out there having this problem  (Read 1540 times)

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Offline royalone

  • Member
  • Posts: 5
Any one out there having this problem
« on: March 03, 2009, 09:54:25 AM »
I am newly married but recently i notice I have developed a problem I would have a great hard erection but as soon as I put on a condom I would go soft and would have a hard time getting it up again. It is becoming very frustrating for me and  my wife. Is anyone having this problem and what advice can you give I just want to make her happy. Thanks.

Offline David_CA

  • Member
  • Posts: 3,246
  • Joined: March 2006
Re: Any one out there having this problem
« Reply #1 on: March 03, 2009, 11:09:47 AM »
... I just want to make her happy.
Don't forget about making you happy, too!  I'll make 2 guesses at the problem.  One, the condom is too tight.  I know that'll kill an erection (on me).  The second is the psychological issue of needing a condom.  By that I mean that perhaps the fact that you even need to use a condom is bothering you without you really knowing it.  I'd think that as long as you can get an erection and keep it (without a condom), you don't have a physical problem 'cept maybe for condom size.  Without getting too personal... if you can take care of yourself while wearing a condom, I'd say the problem is psychological for sure.   
Black Friday 03-03-2006
03-23-06 CD4 359 @27.4% VL 75,938
06-01-06 CD4 462 @24.3% VL > 100,000
08-15-06 CD4 388 @22.8% VL >  "
10-21-06 CD4 285 @21.9% VL >  "
  Atripla started 12-01-2006
01-08-07 CD4 429 @26.8% VL 1872!
05-08-07 CD4 478 @28.1% VL 740
08-03-07 CD4 509 @31.8% VL 370
11-06-07 CD4 570 @30.0% VL 140
02-21-08 CD4 648 @32.4% VL 600
05-19-08 CD4 695 @33.1% VL < 48 undetectable!
08-21-08 CD4 725 @34.5%
11-11-08 CD4 672 @39.5%
02-11-09 CD4 773 @36.8%
05-11-09 CD4 615 @36.2%
08-19-09 CD4 770 @38.5%
11-19-09 CD4 944 @33.7%
02-17-10 CD4 678 @39.9%  
06-03-10 CD4 768 @34.9%
09-21-10 CD4 685 @40.3%
01-10-11 CD4 908 @36.3%
05-23-11 CD4 846 @36.8% VL 80
02-13-12 CD4 911 @41.4% VL<20
You must be the change you want to see in the world.  Mahatma Gandhi

Offline Ann

  • Administrator
  • Member
  • Posts: 28,140
  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: Any one out there having this problem
« Reply #2 on: March 03, 2009, 11:29:20 AM »
Hi Roy,

You could try making the act of putting on the condom part of your foreplay by having your wife put it on you. She could also use her mouth instead of her hand. If you two practice, she may get to the point where she can slip it on you without you even realising she's done it. The idea is to make it erotic. Masturbating with a condom on may also help eroticise them for you.

It may also help to have it ready on your bedside table so you don't have to stop and tear the packet open.

Instructions for putting a condom on with one's mouth:

  • Open the condom, and unroll it a little way.
  • Open your lips into a letter "O".
  • Put the condom (making sure that it's facing the right direction) between your upper and lower lips, in front of the teeth.
  • Holding on to the penis with one hand, put your mouth on that penis.
  • Tighten your lips and push down on the rim of the condom.
  • Push from the neck to unroll the condom down the penis.

You could also try out the female condom. Have a look through all three condom and lube links in my signature line. You'll find a link to info about the female condom in the left-hand column of either of the Aidsmap pages.

Good luck!

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline bocker3

  • Member
  • Posts: 3,458
  • You gotta enjoy life......
Re: Any one out there having this problem
« Reply #3 on: March 03, 2009, 05:11:51 PM »

Instructions for putting a condom on with one's mouth:

  • Open the condom, and unroll it a little way.
  • Open your lips into a letter "O".
  • Put the condom (making sure that it's facing the right direction) between your upper and lower lips, in front of the teeth.
  • Holding on to the penis with one hand, put your mouth on that penis.
  • Tighten your lips and push down on the rim of the condom.
  • Push from the neck to unroll the condom down the penis.

Ann

Wow!  Now why have I never thought of this??  and you seem so "educated" about it.....   :o   ;)

Mike
Atripla - Started 12/05
Reyataz/Norvir - Added 6/06
Labs - Pre-Meds
Sep05 T=350/25% VL98,559
Nov05 288/18%  47,564
Current Labs
May2013 691/31% <20

Offline Ann

  • Administrator
  • Member
  • Posts: 28,140
  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: Any one out there having this problem
« Reply #4 on: March 03, 2009, 06:49:39 PM »
Wow!  Now why have I never thought of this??  and you seem so "educated" about it.....   :o   ;)

Mike


You don't get to be my age without learning a trick or two! ;D
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline David_CA

  • Member
  • Posts: 3,246
  • Joined: March 2006
Re: Any one out there having this problem
« Reply #5 on: March 03, 2009, 08:29:33 PM »
Sounds like it's time for a YouTube video demo!  Perhaps we should use a banana or hot dog instead of an actual penis.  Of course, we could use the real thing and have it on Xtube!   ;)
Black Friday 03-03-2006
03-23-06 CD4 359 @27.4% VL 75,938
06-01-06 CD4 462 @24.3% VL > 100,000
08-15-06 CD4 388 @22.8% VL >  "
10-21-06 CD4 285 @21.9% VL >  "
  Atripla started 12-01-2006
01-08-07 CD4 429 @26.8% VL 1872!
05-08-07 CD4 478 @28.1% VL 740
08-03-07 CD4 509 @31.8% VL 370
11-06-07 CD4 570 @30.0% VL 140
02-21-08 CD4 648 @32.4% VL 600
05-19-08 CD4 695 @33.1% VL < 48 undetectable!
08-21-08 CD4 725 @34.5%
11-11-08 CD4 672 @39.5%
02-11-09 CD4 773 @36.8%
05-11-09 CD4 615 @36.2%
08-19-09 CD4 770 @38.5%
11-19-09 CD4 944 @33.7%
02-17-10 CD4 678 @39.9%  
06-03-10 CD4 768 @34.9%
09-21-10 CD4 685 @40.3%
01-10-11 CD4 908 @36.3%
05-23-11 CD4 846 @36.8% VL 80
02-13-12 CD4 911 @41.4% VL<20
You must be the change you want to see in the world.  Mahatma Gandhi

Offline BT65

  • Global Moderator
  • Member
  • Posts: 10,093
Re: Any one out there having this problem
« Reply #6 on: March 03, 2009, 08:29:47 PM »
You don't get to be my age without learning a trick or two! ;D

leave it to Ann. :-*
I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

Offline anniebc

  • Member
  • Posts: 5,956
  • AM member since 2003
Re: Any one out there having this problem
« Reply #7 on: March 03, 2009, 08:52:09 PM »
Damn...those Nuns taught me NOTHING!!!!!!... ;)

Hugs
Jan :-*

-----------------------------------------------------------------------
Never knock on deaths door..ring the bell and run..he really hates that.

Offline aztecan

  • Member
  • Posts: 5,430
  • 29 years positive, 57 years a pain in the butt
Re: Any one out there having this problem
« Reply #8 on: March 03, 2009, 10:10:01 PM »
Another trick is to use a condom when masturbating.


After a while, the thought of putting on a condom can be a turnon.

HUGS,

Mark
"May your life preach more loudly than your lips."
~ William Ellery Channing (Unitarian Minister)

Offline royalone

  • Member
  • Posts: 5
Re: Any one out there having this problem
« Reply #9 on: March 06, 2009, 11:43:45 AM »
Hi folks thanks very much for your input what a blessing you are all to me and others on this site stay well i will be working at it

Offline rondrond

  • Member
  • Posts: 1,712
Re: Any one out there having this problem
« Reply #10 on: March 06, 2009, 12:59:59 PM »
Hi Roy,

You could try making the act of putting on the condom part of your foreplay by having your wife put it on you. She could also use her mouth instead of her hand. If you two practice, she may get to the point where she can slip it on you without you even realising she's done it. The idea is to make it erotic. Masturbating with a condom on may also help eroticise them for you.

It may also help to have it ready on your bedside table so you don't have to stop and tear the packet open.

Instructions for putting a condom on with one's mouth:

  • Open the condom, and unroll it a little way.
  • Open your lips into a letter "O".
  • Put the condom (making sure that it's facing the right direction) between your upper and lower lips, in front of the teeth.
  • Holding on to the penis with one hand, put your mouth on that penis.
  • Tighten your lips and push down on the rim of the condom.
  • Push from the neck to unroll the condom down the penis.

You could also try out the female condom. Have a look through all three condom and lube links in my signature line. You'll find a link to info about the female condom in the left-hand column of either of the Aidsmap pages.

Good luck!

Ann



.....and then what happens  ???....you got me this far, and then .... ::) :D
"I may not be exactly where I want to be, but I sure as Hell am not where I was"
Wynnona Judd

Diagnosed/HIV
1993
AZT
Norvir
1994-2001
Crixivan/Epivir/Zerit
No Meds for 7 Years

04jul07/DVT-right leg/Bi Lateral PE's     
16oct08/DVT-left leg
Sept '09  6 blood clots in left arm
Coumadin 5mgs
                                     
Atenolol/50mg/2x
Hydrochlorth 25mg/1x
Gemfibrozil/300mgs/2X
Symbicort
Proventil Inhaler
Potassium
Rhinocort


*APR 08~Viramune/Truvada
March08  CD4 330 23% VL 452.000 
*Jan09 Med change~Epzicom/Viramune

Aug09   CD4 523 23%  VL<48
Diagnosed: COPD
Dec 2013: CD4 645 45% VL 49
Med Change: Viramune/Epivir/Ziagen/Isentress

 


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