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Author Topic: Fingering and risk  (Read 11468 times)

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Offline unadon

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Fingering and risk
« on: January 23, 2009, 02:36:14 PM »
Hi, I was fingered in the anus for a few minutes and am very worried I contracted HIV.  Is this possible?
I checked the person's hands the next day and didn't see any scratches, wounds, or sores, but am afraid that there might have been a miniscule prick or wound the day before and blood got into my bloodstream through the mucous membranes of my anus.  Please advise.  Worried Sick.

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: Fingering and risk
« Reply #1 on: January 23, 2009, 02:46:14 PM »
You are worrying needlessly. No matter what nicks, scratches, bruises or cuts you or the other person may have on fingers, HIV is not transmitted through the very common activity of  fingering. It's a fragile virus which is passed sexually through unprotected vaginal and anal intercourse.

All of the other sexual activities are risky only in theory. In the real world of HIV it happens as I have mentioned above. As long as you consistently use condoms for those activities you will be well protected as far as HIV is concerned.

There's no need for further concern this time on your part.

Cheers.
« Last Edit: January 23, 2009, 05:32:26 PM by Andy Velez »
Andy Velez

Offline unadon

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Re: Fingering and risk
« Reply #2 on: January 23, 2009, 03:01:59 PM »
Thanks Andy for your reassuring words.  You know, sometimes it is a rationale voice of reason like yours that helps to calm anxiety.  I have been losing plenty of sleep over this as I am married and my wife is expecting and I simply do not want to put them at risk.  So, again, there is really no need to worry as there is no risk of HIV infection?

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: Fingering and risk
« Reply #3 on: January 23, 2009, 05:31:15 PM »
Yes, I appreciate your cause for concern. Along with everything else and even with happily anticipating a baby, that can in itself induce a lot of stress. And guilt for straying. Once again, as far as HIV is concerned you are worrying needlessly.

If guilt is a part of your concern, do yourself and everyone else a favor by taking a breath, accepting this bit of your personal history, breathe and let it go.

Good luck with the challenges of parenthood.

Cheers.
Andy Velez

Offline unadon

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Re: Fingering and risk
« Reply #4 on: January 24, 2009, 06:50:58 PM »
Thanks again.  Sorry to belabor this, but has anyone ever got hiv this way?

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: Fingering and risk
« Reply #5 on: January 24, 2009, 06:56:48 PM »
No, not that I have ever heard of. Of course I have only been working in the epidemic since 1987 so you don't have to take my word for it.
Andy Velez

Offline unadon

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Re: Fingering and risk
« Reply #6 on: January 27, 2009, 03:52:14 PM »
Sorry Andy, I really didn't mean to doubt your very reassuring thoughts.  Its just that what I've read about transmission leads me to stay awake at night -- that the virus is most present in blood, and can be passed through mucous membranes -- leading me to think it not improbable that if there was infected blood on her finger, and that blood came into contact with my rectal membranes, HIV could be transmitted.  Also I have been experiencing flu-like symptoms (increased body temperature, and congestion) and body aches and pains that is causing me to panic even more! 

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: Fingering and risk
« Reply #7 on: January 27, 2009, 04:20:12 PM »
Check your symptoms out with your doctor. They have nothing to do with HIV. HIV is a fragile virus and if it were as easily transmitted as in the situation you have reported, please believe me, the epidemic would be far worse than it already is.

Your mind may continueto churn up anxiety provoking thoughts, but they have no basis in HIV science this time.

Cheers.i
Andy Velez

Offline unadon

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Re: Fingering and risk
« Reply #8 on: January 31, 2009, 02:01:02 PM »
Hi Andy, you are right that my mind keeps churning out frightening possibilities. I have nightmares of bloody fingertips and wake up screaming, etc. , etc.  I don't want to be subject to a time-out here, but based on what you are saying, there is 100% definitively zero risk of HIV infection from being fingered in the rectum, even when there is a some blood on the finger, right?

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: Fingering and risk
« Reply #9 on: January 31, 2009, 04:53:19 PM »
That's right. You were not at risk from that incident. Period.
Andy Velez

Offline unadon

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Re: Fingering and risk
« Reply #10 on: February 08, 2009, 07:17:55 PM »
Okay.  Last questions, then I promise to stop.  So I can continue to have unprotected intercourse with my wife without any risk to her and the child?  Will HIV testing be necessary before I do?

Offline RapidRod

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Re: Fingering and risk
« Reply #11 on: February 08, 2009, 08:15:18 PM »
You didn't have a risk and you don't need testing.

Offline unadon

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Vaginal and anal fluids on hands while getting a handjob
« Reply #12 on: October 14, 2010, 05:12:49 PM »
Hi, recently I had an encounter where a CSW gave me a handjob, after she fingered herself in the vagina and anus she used the same hand to rub my penis and testicles.  Am I at risk of getting HIV or any form of STDs?  If not, why?

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: Vaginal and anal fluids on hands while getting a handjob
« Reply #13 on: October 14, 2010, 05:17:47 PM »
HIV is a fragile virus and is not transmitted from touching or a hand job. The only confirmed risks for the sexual transmission of HIV are unprotected vaginal and anal intercourse. If you consistently use condoms for those acts you will be well protected.

We deal only with HIV here. We advise that anyone who is sexually active ought to at least annually have a full std panel done since other STDs are much easier to acquire than HIV. However, I would not consider what you have described as likely to have been risky for other diseases.
Andy Velez

Offline RapidRod

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Re: Vaginal and anal fluids on hands while getting a handjob
« Reply #14 on: October 14, 2010, 05:20:25 PM »
 Please do not start a new thread every time you have another question or thought - regardless if you think your questions are related to each other or not. It helps us to help you when you keep all your thoughts or questions in one thread and it helps other readers to follow the discussion. Additional threads will be merged.

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: Fingering and risk
« Reply #15 on: October 14, 2010, 06:49:40 PM »
I hadn't noticed that you already had a thread started before your latest question. I've merged your threads here. In the future please follow our rule and keep all of your entries in this same thread.

Thanks for your cooperation.
Andy Velez

Offline unadon

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Re: Fingering and risk
« Reply #16 on: October 14, 2010, 07:40:32 PM »
Sorry. I forgot about that rule because my last questions were over a year ago.

In any event, in my most recent encounter, is there 100% no risk even though there may be vaginal fluids on her hands?

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: Fingering and risk
« Reply #17 on: October 14, 2010, 07:47:03 PM »
No risk for HIV whatsoever. No need for further concern.  No need for testing.

Got it? No risk. Period.
Andy Velez

Offline unadon

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Re: Fingering and risk
« Reply #18 on: October 17, 2010, 08:26:07 PM »
There are a lot of conflicting information on the web about this.  Some people say that handjobs with fluids on the hands are a risk for HIV but others like this site say it is categorically and absolutely not a risk.  I do hope that it is in the latter category but it is not clear to me from this forum what are the scientific reasons for this, even if there were vaginal  (not cervical) fluids or anal  secretions on the hand giving a handjob?

Is it one or more of the following reasons: (i) that exterior vaginal secretions are not HIV infectious because the HIV infectious liquid comes from deep inside the cervix; (ii) there needs to be a lot of fluid or secretions to infect with HIV and it is not possible to carry enough fluid on the hands to infect; (iii) the hiv virus is not infectious outside of the body (even if it is just a few seconds outside the body); (iv) hiv infectious fluid needs to be rubbed vigorously into the urethra of the penis and this does not occur during a handjob? 

Have there every been any reported cases in the history of HIV where someone got infected from a handjob because of blood, semen, vaginal fluid on the hands?

Offline RapidRod

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Re: Fingering and risk
« Reply #19 on: October 17, 2010, 08:31:12 PM »
HIV is unable to reproduce outside its living host (unlike many bacteria or fungi, which may do so under suitable conditions), except under laboratory conditions, therefore, it does not spread or maintain infectiousness outside its host.

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: Fingering and risk
« Reply #20 on: October 17, 2010, 08:50:03 PM »
If you continue to search on the web I can promise you that you will find plenty to fuel your worst fears.All to no good purpose of course.The things you are currently concerned about are not risks for HIV transmission. Period.

Give it up, get on with your life, always use condoms for vaginal and anal intercourse and you'll be ok as far as the sexual transmission of HIV is concerned. It really is that simple.
Andy Velez

Offline unadon

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Re: Fingering and risk
« Reply #21 on: October 17, 2010, 10:39:11 PM »
Thanks, Andy.  I guess I'm just looking to rationalize the statement that there is 100% no risk by looking for scientific explanation. 

Offline jkinatl2

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Re: Fingering and risk
« Reply #22 on: October 17, 2010, 11:01:20 PM »
There is no 100% in science.

Not ever.

What you report would certainly make the papers, and be the subject of great scientific scrutiny if it were documented.

It is your call. Do you worry about meteors crashing into your house? That is actually a documented phenomenon, unlike this scenario.

"Many people, especially in the gay community, turn to oral sex as a safer alternative in the age of AIDS. And with HIV rates rising, people need to remember that oral sex is safer sex. It's a reasonable alternative."

-Kimberly Page-Shafer, PhD, MPH

Welcome Thread

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: Fingering and risk
« Reply #23 on: October 18, 2010, 09:39:00 AM »
Nothing sexually except using your hand on yourself is 100% safe sexually.

You have no cause for concern about HIV at this time.

If you continue to return about this non-risk incident I need to warn you that you may find yourself getting a Time Out for 28 days from the site.

HIV is not your problem at this point. And it will continue that way at least in terms of things sexual if you consistently use condoms for vaginal and anal intercourse. It really is just that simple.
Andy Velez

Offline unadon

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fingering and risk
« Reply #24 on: March 13, 2011, 08:57:48 AM »
hi, i recently fingered a CSW with a big papercut on my finger.  am worried sick.  what are my hiv risks?

Offline RapidRod

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Re: fingering and risk
« Reply #25 on: March 13, 2011, 09:07:11 AM »
YOU'VE BEEN TOLD BEFORE.

 Please do not start a new thread every time you have another question or thought - regardless if you think your questions are related to each other or not. It helps us to help you when you keep all your thoughts or questions in one thread and it helps other readers to follow the discussion. Additional threads will be merged.

Offline unadon

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Re: fingering and risk
« Reply #26 on: March 13, 2011, 09:17:10 AM »
My previous posts were about being fingered.  This is a new question.  It would be helpful if my anxiety wasn't dismissed in this manner.

Offline Ann

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Re: Fingering and risk
« Reply #27 on: March 13, 2011, 11:07:27 AM »
Unadon,

I've merged your new thread into your original thread - where you should post all your additional thoughts or questions. It helps us to help you when you keep all your additional thoughts or questions in one thread. It doesn't matter how long it has been since you last posted in your thread or if the subject matter is different.

You don't have to like - or even understand - our rules, but you DO have to abide by them.

If you need help finding your thread when you come here, click on the "Show own posts" link under your name in the left-hand column of any forum page.

Please also read through the Welcome Thread so you can familiarize yourself with our Forum Posting Guidelines. Thank you for your cooperation.




Once again, you have not been at risk for hiv infection. Fingering, regardless if you are doing the fingering or if you are being fingered, is NOT a risk for hiv infection. Not one single person has ever been infected this way and you are not going to be the first.

The only confirmed sexual risks for hiv infection are unprotected anal or vaginal intercourse. Use condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, correctly and consistently, and you will avoid hiv infection. IT REALLY IS THAT SIMPLE!!!

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline unadon

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Protected vaginal sex - risk of HIV?
« Reply #28 on: April 17, 2011, 04:14:13 PM »
Is it possible to get HIV from protected vaginal sex?  If so, what are the risks?  Thanks in advance for attention to this question.

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: Fingering and risk
« Reply #29 on: April 17, 2011, 04:19:50 PM »
I hadn't noticed that you already had a thread started before your latest question. I've merged your threads here. In the future please follow our rule and keep all of your entries in this same thread.

Thanks for your cooperation.

I am again drawing your attention to our rule about always writing only in your original thread. I've once again merged your threads here.

Protected vaginal sex is just that, protected. Condoms provide very effective protection. If a condom breaks during intercourse there is the possibility of HIV transmission. Testing is necessary if that happens although it is a low-level risk and my experience has been that no one I know of has been infected in that kind of a situation. 
Andy Velez

Offline unadon

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Re: Fingering and risk
« Reply #30 on: April 17, 2011, 04:53:26 PM »
Thanks, Andy.  It slipped my mind that even though it is a completely separate question regarding type of act, i should stick to the same thread. 

So I take it that if the condom remained intact during vaginal sex, the risk for HIV is low or none?

Thanks, again.

Offline unadon

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Re: Fingering and risk
« Reply #31 on: April 17, 2011, 04:58:03 PM »
Forgot to mention that during the last encounter, the CSW also spat her saliva on my penis and used it as lube for a handjob.  Again, is this any risk for HIV?

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: Fingering and risk
« Reply #32 on: April 17, 2011, 09:21:09 PM »
She could have dunked your dick into a bucket of her saliva and it still wouldn't have been a risk for HIV transmission. You are worrying needlessly.
Andy Velez

Offline unadon

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Re: Fingering and risk
« Reply #33 on: May 10, 2011, 05:39:00 PM »
So, I've been reading about the effectiveness of condoms against HIV infection during vaginal sex and the US government website says that there is some risk for HIV infection even if you use a condo.  Is this true?  What is the degree of risk of HIV infection when using condom during vaginal sex for the male?

Offline RapidRod

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Re: Fingering and risk
« Reply #34 on: May 10, 2011, 05:42:49 PM »
No it's not true.

Latex condoms, when used consistently and correctly, are highly effective in preventing the sexual transmission of HIV, the virus that causes AIDS. In addition, consistent and correct use of latex condoms reduces the risk of other sexually transmitted diseases (STDs), including diseases transmitted by genital secretions, and to a lesser degree, genital ulcer diseases. Condom use may reduce the risk for genital human papillomavirus (HPV) infection and HPV-associated diseases, e.g., genital warts and cervical cancer.

Offline unadon

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Re: Fingering and risk
« Reply #35 on: May 12, 2011, 08:59:50 PM »
so would you say that if the condom didn't break, i can be 99% sure that no HIV was transmitted?

Offline Ann

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Re: Fingering and risk
« Reply #36 on: May 13, 2011, 04:49:29 AM »
una,

Condoms have been proven to prevent hiv infection. There have been long-term studies of couples where one is positive and one is negative. In the couples who used condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, but no barrier for oral activities, not one of the negative partners became infected with hiv. Not one.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline unadon

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Re: Fingering and risk
« Reply #37 on: June 24, 2011, 03:16:43 PM »
I just had a few encounters last week where I got unprotected oral sex (blowjobs) on my penis and protected vaginal sex. 

1) When people say there is a "theoretical" risk of HIV infection from these activities, what does that mean?  A low risk?  No risk?  No conceivable risk? 

2) Would shaking hands or deep french kissing also be a "theoretical" risk of HIV infection, since there could be open and bleeding cuts on both parties' hands/mouths and HIV spread that way?

3) With sex with a condom, is it possible that the condoms have small microscopic holes or pinholes that the virus can pass through?  A friend of mine once filled a condom with water after sex and discovered a leak. 

4) If the condom does not fit properly or is loose, does this factor change the risk?

5) In your combined experiences, have you ever seen HIV transmitted either through oral sex or protected sex?

6) Should I get tested or is it okay for me to continue to have unprotected sex with my partner?






Offline RapidRod

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Re: Fingering and risk
« Reply #38 on: June 24, 2011, 04:41:33 PM »
You never had an exposure and don't need testing.

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: Fingering and risk
« Reply #39 on: June 24, 2011, 05:12:39 PM »
That microscopic holes thing is an urban legend. When a condom has a tear it's very clear because it ends up looking like a hoop with fringe on your penis.

Getting a blowjob is not a risk for HIV transmission. As long as you always wear a condom for vaginal or anal intercourse you will be well protected.

In this instance there is no need for testing for HIV. However, we do advise anyone who is sexually active to at least annually have a full STD panel done. Other STDs are much easier to acquire than HIV.

Andy Velez

Offline Ann

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Re: Fingering and risk
« Reply #40 on: June 25, 2011, 08:55:20 AM »
una,

1. When we say something is a theoretical risk, we mean theoretical like how it's a theoretical risk that every time you leave your house, a meteorite might fall from the sky and crush your head. Or how it's theoretical that the next time you leave your house, you will find a winning lottery ticket worth millions lying on your doorstep waiting for you to pick it up and cash it in. Not gonna happen, but it could, in theory.

2. Maybe, if you're both dripping in blood with fresh, deep wounds. But if you're both bleeding that badly, the last thing you're going to do is kiss or shake hands. This falls into the realm of pure fantasy - it's not going to happen.

3. As Andy said, the tiny holes in condom thing is an urban myth created by the Catholic church to scare people away from using condoms. They don't like condoms and will do or say anything to stop people from using them. Filling condoms with water is a stupid thing to do. It's not how they're meant to be used and filling them with water will make them break.

4. No. As long as the head of your penis is covered, you are protected against hiv infection.

5. No.

You did what you are supposed to do, you used a condom for intercourse. You did not have a risk for hiv infection.

Enough is enough already. You've been coming here for two and a half years and you should know this stuff by now. We're not here to hold your hand every time you have a sexual experience outside your marriage. Your fears are more to do with the guilt you feel when you stray and less to do with hiv. We're not marriage counsellors - you need to go elsewhere for that.

If you read the Welcome Thread before posting like you're supposed to, you will have read the following posting guideline:

Quote

Anyone who continues to post excessively, questioning a conclusive negative result or NO RISK SITUATIONS, will be subject to a four week Time Out (a temporary ban from the Forums). If you continue to post excessively after one Time Out, you may be given a second Time Out which will last eight weeks. There is no third Time Out - it is a permanent ban. The purpose of a Time Out is to encourage you to seek the face-to-face help we cannot provide on this forum.


Please consider yourself warned!

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline unadon

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Re: Fingering and risk
« Reply #41 on: June 28, 2011, 11:59:40 AM »
Just wanted to point that the linked article below, published on this website, is suggesting that HIV can be transmitted via oral sex:

http://www.poz.com/articles/Derrick_Burts_HIV_401_20686.shtml


In light of your emphatic and unequivocal statements that oral sex does not transmit HIV, it might be worth having an editorial footnote at the end of the article stating as such.  Otherwise, it could fuel further anxiety and confusion on this already confusing topic.

Offline Ann

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Re: Fingering and risk
« Reply #42 on: June 28, 2011, 12:36:02 PM »
unadon,

That is what we call "patient report" and patient report is notoriously unreliable. Even he says that the two ways he's thinking he got infected are "just an idea" of how he got it. (One was having his ass ejaculated on and the other was from giving blowjobs.) I really rather doubt he's giving us the complete picture.

As for being infected while getting a blowjob, it's just not going to happen.

While patient report is notoriously unreliable, what IS reliable are the results from three different serodiscordant couple studies. There have been long-term studies of couples where one is positive and one is negative. In the couples who used condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, but no barrier for oral activities, not one of the negative partners became infected with hiv. Not one.

One of the studies went of for ten years. All together, the studies involved thousands of people. The only ones to be infected were those who did not consistently use condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse with their positive partners.

You have NOT had a risk for hiv infection and your Time Out warning still stands.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

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"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

 


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