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Author Topic: Why do doctor's ask how you contracted HIV?  (Read 11894 times)

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Offline PeteNYNJ

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Why do doctor's ask how you contracted HIV?
« on: January 09, 2009, 09:51:18 AM »
Hello All

Recently, I had to see a gastro doctor regarding some stomach issues I have been having.  The doctor was taking a history and I told him I was HIV+.  He asked "How did you contract HIV?".  I told him "Unprotected Sex".  He asked "Was it with a man or a woman?".  I said "A man, but why does that matter?".  He really didn't give me a straight answer.

I have had numerous doctors ask me how I contracted HIV?  Is there a reason for this?  Are they just curious?

I understand when they ask how long, if you are on meds, do you see an ID doctor.

Maybe some of our friends in the medical field could answer this question.

Pete

Offline Ann

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Re: Why do doctor's ask how you contracted HIV?
« Reply #1 on: January 09, 2009, 10:05:40 AM »
Hi Pete,

It's none of the gastro's business how you contracted hv. He's just being nosy. In my experience, many medical people use their position to ask what many others who know our status would love to ask - but are simply too polite to do so. Nosy, nosy, nosy.

Ann
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"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline antibody

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Re: Why do doctor's ask how you contracted HIV?
« Reply #2 on: January 09, 2009, 10:26:47 AM »
they want to know what type of risk you are. what are your odds.
Timbuk      <50/ 794  CD4 10/06 
                 <50/ 1096 CD4 3/07
                 <40/ 1854 CD4 4/09

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Offline BT65

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Re: Why do doctor's ask how you contracted HIV?
« Reply #3 on: January 09, 2009, 10:29:36 AM »
they want to know what type of risk you are. what are your odds.

Other than the doctor treating for HIV (for statistics purpose), it's no one else's business.  I agree with Ann, they're being nosey.  Tell them some wild story and see how they react (sex with monkey etc.).
I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

Offline Dachshund

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Re: Why do doctor's ask how you contracted HIV?
« Reply #4 on: January 09, 2009, 10:46:33 AM »
I've never had an ID doc ask me how I contracted the virus. I've had the same ID doc for over ten years now and like clockwork the only thing he asks each and every visit is,"do you use street drugs?"

Offline PeteNYNJ

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Re: Why do doctor's ask how you contracted HIV?
« Reply #5 on: January 09, 2009, 11:18:33 AM »
The ONLY two doctor's who have not questioned me about it have been my ID doctor (who is also my GP) and my dermatologist.

Every single other has asked...including hospital staff. 

I should say "I got it from you...don't you remember?" :)

Yes, I love the "street drugs" line.  I always answer "no, I would never do drugs I just found laying in the street".

Offline Miss Philicia

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Re: Why do doctor's ask how you contracted HIV?
« Reply #6 on: January 09, 2009, 11:23:53 AM »
I've never had a single doctor ask me how I contacted HIV, and for a span of about 4 years in NYC I must have gone to see almost a dozen different specialists, all of which were dutifully informed of my HIV on intake forms.  Now, I can see any ID doctor asking the question not out of any moral judgement but to assess how sexually active you are so that a discussion of other STDs can be engaged.

Furthermore, if you do recreational drugs and the doctor asks you about this why lie?  They've all dealt with this issue before.  If you state that you do a hit of ecstasy every 3 months they're not going to bat an eye.
"Iíve slept with enough men to know that Iím not gay"

Offline PeteNYNJ

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Re: Why do doctor's ask how you contracted HIV?
« Reply #7 on: January 09, 2009, 11:50:46 AM »
Philly

Most of the doctor's who asked were in NJ, so maybe they are more curious there?

As for drugs - If I did do drugs, I wouldnt lie. I already told him I drank like a fish.  I just find the "street drugs" line so 70s.  A bit outdated too since all the younger kids seem to be experimenting with what they are finding in Mom and Dad's medicine cabinet.

Offline GSOgymrat

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Re: Why do doctor's ask how you contracted HIV?
« Reply #8 on: January 09, 2009, 12:10:28 PM »
I work in healthcare and don't know of any reason why anyone other than an ID doctor would need to know how you were infected. The questions I ask of HIV+ people that I don't ask everyone else when I am doing a psych assessment are:

When were you diagnosed?
Are you prescribed HIV medications and are you compliant?
When were your last CD4 and viral load tests and do you remember what the values?

If you were initially diagnosed or in a clinical trial that might want to know how you were infected. I agree with Ann that it sounds like you have nosy doctors.

Offline LordBerners

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Re: Why do doctor's ask how you contracted HIV?
« Reply #9 on: January 09, 2009, 12:27:24 PM »
I've never been asked.
Please, just call me Berners.. or Baron.

Offline Basquo

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Re: Why do doctor's ask how you contracted HIV?
« Reply #10 on: January 09, 2009, 12:48:54 PM »
I've seen a lot of finger-pointing about route of transmission here in the forums, so I wouldn't put it past a curious healthcare provider. Admittedly, I can't remember if I've ever been asked, but up until this moment if I had been asked I would probably have thought they need to know if I'm shooting drugs or need to be tested for other STDs on a frequent basis. Ann's right about it not being any of the gastro's concern, but if it were a colorectal surgeon he might be concerned about, um, tearing some stitches or something.

I do have a problem with healthcare providers who prove their own ignorance or bias in documentation. I analyzed a chart once where a doctor dictated "HIV+ secondary to homosexuality." What a dumbass. 

Offline jennynyc7

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Re: Why do doctor's ask how you contracted HIV?
« Reply #11 on: January 09, 2009, 01:10:11 PM »
I had a similar experience in the ER, but with a twist. The nurse (who was male) and the Dr (who was from India)..not that that matters...anyway..... when I told each of them my status, they seemed ...what's the word.....inquisitive maybe. They were very respectful but asked many questions. They acted as though they wanted me to educate them. They couldn't understand how a young business woman-type could contract it. It's like I was the first person like that they had ever encountered.  I had went out to smoke at one point and the nurse came out and sat with me on the bench and was like.."do you mind talking about it?....He wanted to know how, what when and where. I really didn't mind because, well, I don't mind talking to people about it, especially if they present to me in a respectful way as they did. He kept making sure throughout the conversation that I was cool discussing it with him, and I truely was. Now another time I went to my regular Dr (who I hadn't seen in about 10yrs) for a sinus infection and when I disclosed to him I knew immediately that he was scared. He straight up told me he didn't feel comfortable treating me without my ID Dr's authorization. He also said I would have to disclose to the phlebotomist as well. Which I didn't mind, but it is crap. So, yeah. strange stuff.
12/24/07-infected
1/3/08-ARS began
2/12/08-diagnosed
Initial Vl=99000
CD4=585
2/14/08-began Truvada/Reyataz/Norvir
3/01/08=Swapped Reyataz for Viramune
5/1/08:     vl= undetectable
                cd4=1250
10/24/08:  vl=undetectable
                cd4=1172 (55%)

12/4/08:    vl=254 (hopefully just a small blip)
                cd4=1234

Offline RapidRod

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Re: Why do doctor's ask how you contracted HIV?
« Reply #12 on: January 09, 2009, 01:31:20 PM »
I have only been asked by my ID doctor and all it was drugs, sex or occupational exposure? I love giving them the spill. "Hell I don't know I liked both."

Offline Moffie65

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Re: Why do doctor's ask how you contracted HIV?
« Reply #13 on: January 09, 2009, 03:49:36 PM »
When ever a male doctor askes me this question; I look at their crotch, and comment "You  have a big enough penis, go fuck yourself".
The Bible contains 6 admonishments to homosexuals,
and 362 to heterosexuals.
This doesn't mean that God doesn't love heterosexuals,
It's just that they need more supervision.
Lynn Lavne

Offline David_CA

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Re: Why do doctor's ask how you contracted HIV?
« Reply #14 on: January 09, 2009, 05:36:58 PM »
On my first appointment with my ID Dr., he asked me how I became infected.  It didn't bother me at all.  He also asked if I was gay.  He's been treating HIV+ people for many years and has numerous gay patients, so I didn't take it offensively.  He's always very friendly and doesn't seem to have any sort of negative feelings about how I was infected, that I'm gay, etc.  In fact, twice a year, when he's marking off all the particular tests for the lab (so they'll know how much blood to draw, etc), he mentions something about an STD screen and checks off those, too.  I'm glad he does, as it keeps me from having to ask him to do these tests.  I guess I could get all upset thinking I'm being stereotyped as a slutty gay guy by his suggesting these tests, but, ultimately, my health is more important.
Black Friday 03-03-2006
03-23-06 CD4 359 @27.4% VL 75,938
06-01-06 CD4 462 @24.3% VL > 100,000
08-15-06 CD4 388 @22.8% VL >  "
10-21-06 CD4 285 @21.9% VL >  "
  Atripla started 12-01-2006
01-08-07 CD4 429 @26.8% VL 1872!
05-08-07 CD4 478 @28.1% VL 740
08-03-07 CD4 509 @31.8% VL 370
11-06-07 CD4 570 @30.0% VL 140
02-21-08 CD4 648 @32.4% VL 600
05-19-08 CD4 695 @33.1% VL < 48 undetectable!
08-21-08 CD4 725 @34.5%
11-11-08 CD4 672 @39.5%
02-11-09 CD4 773 @36.8%
05-11-09 CD4 615 @36.2%
08-19-09 CD4 770 @38.5%
11-19-09 CD4 944 @33.7%
02-17-10 CD4 678 @39.9%  
06-03-10 CD4 768 @34.9%
09-21-10 CD4 685 @40.3%
01-10-11 CD4 908 @36.3%
05-23-11 CD4 846 @36.8% VL 80
02-13-12 CD4 911 @41.4% VL<20
You must be the change you want to see in the world.  Mahatma Gandhi

Offline RapidRod

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Re: Why do doctor's ask how you contracted HIV?
« Reply #15 on: January 09, 2009, 05:55:34 PM »
On my first appointment with my ID Dr., he asked me how I became infected.  It didn't bother me at all.  He also asked if I was gay.  He's been treating HIV+ people for many years and has numerous gay patients, so I didn't take it offensively.  He's always very friendly and doesn't seem to have any sort of negative feelings about how I was infected, that I'm gay, etc.  In fact, twice a year, when he's marking off all the particular tests for the lab (so they'll know how much blood to draw, etc), he mentions something about an STD screen and checks off those, too.  I'm glad he does, as it keeps me from having to ask him to do these tests.  I guess I could get all upset thinking I'm being stereotyped as a slutty gay guy by his suggesting these tests, but, ultimately, my health is more important.

David, you're not? ;)

Offline Miss Philicia

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Re: Why do doctor's ask how you contracted HIV?
« Reply #16 on: January 09, 2009, 06:00:46 PM »
Don't you need more than one STD screen per year?
"Iíve slept with enough men to know that Iím not gay"

Offline HopeandCope

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Re: Why do doctor's ask how you contracted HIV?
« Reply #17 on: January 09, 2009, 07:12:20 PM »
My son told the Doc when he asked that he got HIV from having raw monkey sex with puppies.
Jude
Hope and Cope Support Site
A Safe Place for Families & Friends of HIV+ People
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Offline David_CA

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Re: Why do doctor's ask how you contracted HIV?
« Reply #18 on: January 09, 2009, 09:04:07 PM »
Quote
Quote from: David_NC on Today at 05:36:58 pm
On my first appointment with my ID Dr., he asked me how I became infected.  It didn't bother me at all.  He also asked if I was gay.  He's been treating HIV+ people for many years and has numerous gay patients, so I didn't take it offensively.  He's always very friendly and doesn't seem to have any sort of negative feelings about how I was infected, that I'm gay, etc.  In fact, twice a year, when he's marking off all the particular tests for the lab (so they'll know how much blood to draw, etc), he mentions something about an STD screen and checks off those, too.  I'm glad he does, as it keeps me from having to ask him to do these tests.  I guess I could get all upset thinking I'm being stereotyped as a slutty gay guy by his suggesting these tests, but, ultimately, my health is more important.
David, you're not? ;)

No, I'm not the least bit upset!  :D
Black Friday 03-03-2006
03-23-06 CD4 359 @27.4% VL 75,938
06-01-06 CD4 462 @24.3% VL > 100,000
08-15-06 CD4 388 @22.8% VL >  "
10-21-06 CD4 285 @21.9% VL >  "
  Atripla started 12-01-2006
01-08-07 CD4 429 @26.8% VL 1872!
05-08-07 CD4 478 @28.1% VL 740
08-03-07 CD4 509 @31.8% VL 370
11-06-07 CD4 570 @30.0% VL 140
02-21-08 CD4 648 @32.4% VL 600
05-19-08 CD4 695 @33.1% VL < 48 undetectable!
08-21-08 CD4 725 @34.5%
11-11-08 CD4 672 @39.5%
02-11-09 CD4 773 @36.8%
05-11-09 CD4 615 @36.2%
08-19-09 CD4 770 @38.5%
11-19-09 CD4 944 @33.7%
02-17-10 CD4 678 @39.9%  
06-03-10 CD4 768 @34.9%
09-21-10 CD4 685 @40.3%
01-10-11 CD4 908 @36.3%
05-23-11 CD4 846 @36.8% VL 80
02-13-12 CD4 911 @41.4% VL<20
You must be the change you want to see in the world.  Mahatma Gandhi

Offline J.R.E.

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Re: Why do doctor's ask how you contracted HIV?
« Reply #19 on: January 09, 2009, 11:45:37 PM »
Admittedly, I can't remember if I've ever been asked, but up until this moment if I had been asked I would probably have thought they need to know if I'm shooting drugs or need to be tested for other STDs on a frequent basis.  


My doctor never asked me how I became infected. I also believe I was asked that question 23 plus years ago , at the health department. I volunteered that info. But I agree with the above. It may give the doctor a little more insight into the individual, and perhaps more and/or frequent testing for STD's etc.., and the possibility of knowing about  an addiction problem. I've never had any other specialist ask me that question. However, I have had conversations with my Eye doctor, annually, when it comes to current t-cell count and viral load, I also have the t-cell question and viral load question asked, when I see my dermatologist.


Ray


EDITED to add a little more
« Last Edit: January 09, 2009, 11:57:20 PM by J.R.E. »
Current Meds ; Viramune, Epzicom, 40mg of simvastatin, 12.5mg of Hydrochlorothiazide.
Metoprolol tartrate 25mg



http://forums.poz.com/index.php?topic=40802.0

http://forums.poz.com/index.php?topic=45159.0

http://forums.poz.com/index.php?topic=39722.msg495621;topicseen#msg495621

http://forums.poz.com/index.php?topic=46806.0

http://forums.poz.com/index.php?topic=39414.msg491701#msg491701


 In October of 2003, My t-cell count was 16, Viral load was over 500,000, Percentage at that time was 5%. I started my first  HAART regimen  on October 24th,03.

 As of DEC 9th, 2013,  t-cells are at 437 Viral load  <40 .

 Current % is at 16% (L)

  
 62 years young.

Offline AlanBama

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Re: Why do doctor's ask how you contracted HIV?
« Reply #20 on: January 09, 2009, 11:58:47 PM »
Pete, Ann is right, it was just plain old nosiness.   There is no reason for the doctor (other than ID) to ask how you became infected.   The last one to ask me that was some dental hygenist, in '01 or '02; I told her "they think it was Mother to child transmission".    Let her stew on that awhile (I was 45 at the time)
"Remember my sentimental friend that a heart is not judged by how much you love, but by how much you are loved by others." - The Wizard of Oz

Offline YaKaMein

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Re: Why do doctor's ask how you contracted HIV?
« Reply #21 on: January 10, 2009, 12:25:47 AM »
Being in medical education [not a physician], questions about modes of infection would not be necessary to diagnose or treat a patient in a specialist consultation or ER situation. Certainly, there are exceptions; ID, Peds or Psych come to mind but mostly for histories of a new patient that a physician plans to follow.  In a general/family practice setting, one could inquire but again as part of a new patient's hx. Otherwise, it's just plain intrusive!

Standards of care suggest regular routine STD screening of anyone who is sexually active, regardless of HIV status, like pregnancy tests for all females. The goal of a thorough medical interview including sexual history, social/behavioral assessment, etc is to provide better comprehensive care specific to a patient, pure and simple.
09/11 Endocrine Consult
08/11 CD4 328 14.9% VL 0
 Disc'd Bactrim DEXA -3.1 Tscore
03/11 CD4 338 14.7% VL 0
11/10 CD4 300 14.3% VL 0 <20copies
07/10 CD4 336 14.0% VL 0 DEXA -2.7 Tscore
03/10 CD4 308 13.4% VL 0 Vit D normal
01/10 Began FOTO
11/09 CD4 274 13.7% VL 0 Chol 173 Trig 131
07/09 CD4 324 13.5% VL 0 DEXA -3.1 Tscore lumbar
03/09 CD4 207 10.9% VL 0
11/08 CD4 227 10.3% VL 0 Chol 176 Trig 156
04/08 CD4 228 9.5% VL 0
01/08 CD4 194 9.0% VL 0
09/07 CD4 176 8.3% VL 0
03/07 CD4 130 9.5% VL 0 Chol 261  Trig 227
12/06 CD4 109 6.4% VL 0
09/06 CD4  88 5.5% VL und desens'd rtd to Bactrim
08/06  Began Atripla
07/06 CD4  59 5.0% VL 145 Chol 117 Trig 104
06/06  Bactrim rash, X2 Dapsone
 EFV & Truvada Chol 128 Trig 131
05/06 CD4  6 (2.0%) VL 78667 only V179D mutation Dx PC MAC

Offline Ann

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Re: Why do doctor's ask how you contracted HIV?
« Reply #22 on: January 10, 2009, 04:00:50 AM »
Ann's right about it not being any of the gastro's concern, but if it were a colorectal surgeon he might be concerned about, um, tearing some stitches or something.
 

In that scenario, it's still none of the doctor's business how one contracted hiv. The correct question would be - "do you engage in receptive anal intercourse?"

No, scratch that. The shouldn't have to ask the question at all. They should cover all bases and simply say - "IF you engage in receptive anal intercourse, you may want to wait until I've given you the all-clear (or wait x amount of days), just to make sure you don't cause damage to the surgical site."

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline minismom

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Re: Why do doctor's ask how you contracted HIV?
« Reply #23 on: January 10, 2009, 06:22:30 AM »
Pete, because stupid people say stupid things when they think your life is their business.  I've been asked more about how Mim contracted the virus here (in the forums) than anywhere else.  Most folks just assume and I've gotten the short end of it from nurses in particular. 

No one has asked her, yet, and I'll have to come up with a good line for her.  "Monkey sex" from an 8 1/2yr old might get me arrested. ;)

Good luck with your gastro issues.  I hope they can be resolved soon.

Mum
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Offline rondrond

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Re: Why do doctor's ask how you contracted HIV?
« Reply #24 on: January 10, 2009, 06:42:20 AM »
Pete,

When asked, I looked at them and said, "I was a bartender, I partied, had sex and did drugs...take your pick."
"I may not be exactly where I want to be, but I sure as Hell am not where I was"
Wynnona Judd

Diagnosed/HIV
1993
AZT
Norvir
1994-2001
Crixivan/Epivir/Zerit
No Meds for 7 Years

04jul07/DVT-right leg/Bi Lateral PE's     
16oct08/DVT-left leg
Sept '09  6 blood clots in left arm
Coumadin 5mgs
                                     
Atenolol/50mg/2x
Hydrochlorth 25mg/1x
Gemfibrozil/300mgs/2X
Symbicort
Proventil Inhaler
Potassium
Rhinocort


*APR 08~Viramune/Truvada
March08  CD4 330 23% VL 452.000 
*Jan09 Med change~Epzicom/Viramune

Aug09   CD4 523 23%  VL<48
Diagnosed: COPD
Dec 2013: CD4 645 45% VL 49
Med Change: Viramune/Epivir/Ziagen/Isentress

Offline BT65

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Re: Why do doctor's ask how you contracted HIV?
« Reply #25 on: January 10, 2009, 10:47:12 AM »
I was told the reason the ID doctor asks is for statistics purposes (how states and the CDC keep track of which group of people HIV is growing the fastest in).  The same probably holds true with a health department. 
I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

Offline red_Dragon888

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Re: Why do doctor's ask how you contracted HIV?
« Reply #26 on: January 10, 2009, 10:33:12 PM »
just give them the usual pat answer:
1) i don't know
2) why do you care
3) i would tell but then i would have to kill you
http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=I3ba3lnFHik

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Offline vivyt

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Re: Why do doctor's ask how you contracted HIV?
« Reply #27 on: January 10, 2009, 11:37:26 PM »
I have only been to 2 new doctors since my diagnosis in 2007. Both asked. I think the reason was similar to Jenny's. They just seem so surprsed, espcially after filling out alll the health history paperwork and seeing nothing expect the HIV. They do seem just more curious and surprised.

Offline littlefire

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Re: Why do doctor's ask how you contracted HIV?
« Reply #28 on: January 11, 2009, 05:12:55 AM »
I got asked that question once by a nurse who was meant to draw blood for tests. I told her if she doesn't know how HIV is contracted, I don't want her anywhere near me with a needle, I got up and walked out. She doesn't work at that clinic any more :)

Offline red_Dragon888

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Re: Why do doctor's ask how you contracted HIV?
« Reply #29 on: January 11, 2009, 09:20:54 AM »
I got asked that question once by a nurse who was meant to draw blood for tests. I told her if she doesn't know how HIV is contracted, I don't want her anywhere near me with a needle, I got up and walked out. She doesn't work at that clinic any more :)
lol
http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=I3ba3lnFHik

ďNeither look forward where there is doubt nor backward where there is regret. Look inward and ask not if there is anything o

Offline MarcoPoz

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Re: Why do doctor's ask how you contracted HIV?
« Reply #30 on: January 12, 2009, 08:34:16 AM »
A few years ago I went into the ER for what I thought was a heart attack (scary as hell, ya know?) and while I'm being worked on, this nurse comes up to me and asked me "Tell me how this happend to you".  SO I began explaining the pain in my chest.  She stopped me and said "No, I mean your HIV".  I had asked them to call my ID doc when I got there and this ER is part of my medical 'system"--shared records etc.

I looked at the nurse in disbelief.  I'm one of those guys who goes to schools and does talks about how I got HIV and why they should stay safe, etc etc.

So I looked at the nurse, looked at all the tubes and cords running from my body, and said "If you don't mind, I'm pretty fucking busy right now.  Come back later for story time".  Another nurse working on me snorted (laughing) and walked away.

After they had me boarded in the ER and chilled out (turned out to be vaso-spasms--no heart attack!) the nurse came back to me.  She said she was sorry.  I told her that I got infected sharing a public toilet seat with Haitians and Heroin users and we all got bit by the same Gay mosquito :-) (A nod the the 4H's of the '80's)

She didn't laugh.  So I told her my story.  When I finished.  I asked her why she thought she could even ask me that questions and if she could understand what a vulnerable and confusing place she put me in.

She apologized again.  They obviously still don't teach patient 'care' at teaching hospitals ;-)

Offline red_Dragon888

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Re: Why do doctor's ask how you contracted HIV?
« Reply #31 on: January 12, 2009, 08:58:35 AM »
A few years ago I went into the ER for what I thought was a heart attack (scary as hell, ya know?) and while I'm being worked on, this nurse comes up to me and asked me "Tell me how this happend to you". ....
She apologized again.  They obviously still don't teach patient 'care' at teaching hospitals ;-)

lol

good one. 
http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=I3ba3lnFHik

ďNeither look forward where there is doubt nor backward where there is regret. Look inward and ask not if there is anything o

Offline LTSurviver

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Re: Why do doctor's ask how you contracted HIV?
« Reply #32 on: January 12, 2009, 12:58:17 PM »
In my 22 years of being positive, I have realized one thing:

People ask so they can judge you.  Period.

They want to fit you into the two narrow categories they have made up for PWAs.  "Innocent victim" and "Dirty, nasty, irresponsible people that deserve it."

That may sound jaded and bitter.  I'm told again and again that people are just curious.  Bullcrap.  I know better. 

Offline David_CA

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Re: Why do doctor's ask how you contracted HIV?
« Reply #33 on: January 12, 2009, 03:22:19 PM »
In my 22 years of being positive, I have realized one thing:

People ask so they can judge you.  Period.

They want to fit you into the two narrow categories they have made up for PWAs.  "Innocent victim" and "Dirty, nasty, irresponsible people that deserve it."

That may sound jaded and bitter.  I'm told again and again that people are just curious.  Bullcrap.  I know better. 


I wouldn't say that description fits most any who've have asked me, fortunately. 
« Last Edit: January 12, 2009, 06:12:48 PM by David_NC »
Black Friday 03-03-2006
03-23-06 CD4 359 @27.4% VL 75,938
06-01-06 CD4 462 @24.3% VL > 100,000
08-15-06 CD4 388 @22.8% VL >  "
10-21-06 CD4 285 @21.9% VL >  "
  Atripla started 12-01-2006
01-08-07 CD4 429 @26.8% VL 1872!
05-08-07 CD4 478 @28.1% VL 740
08-03-07 CD4 509 @31.8% VL 370
11-06-07 CD4 570 @30.0% VL 140
02-21-08 CD4 648 @32.4% VL 600
05-19-08 CD4 695 @33.1% VL < 48 undetectable!
08-21-08 CD4 725 @34.5%
11-11-08 CD4 672 @39.5%
02-11-09 CD4 773 @36.8%
05-11-09 CD4 615 @36.2%
08-19-09 CD4 770 @38.5%
11-19-09 CD4 944 @33.7%
02-17-10 CD4 678 @39.9%  
06-03-10 CD4 768 @34.9%
09-21-10 CD4 685 @40.3%
01-10-11 CD4 908 @36.3%
05-23-11 CD4 846 @36.8% VL 80
02-13-12 CD4 911 @41.4% VL<20
You must be the change you want to see in the world.  Mahatma Gandhi

Offline RapidRod

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Re: Why do doctor's ask how you contracted HIV?
« Reply #34 on: January 12, 2009, 03:31:29 PM »
In my 22 years of being positive, I have realized one thing:

People ask so they can judge you.  Period.

They want to fit you into the two narrow categories they have made up for PWAs.  "Innocent victim" and "Dirty, nasty, irresponsible people that deserve it."

That may sound jaded and bitter.  I'm told again and again that people are just curious.  Bullcrap.  I know better. 


Never have I felt like I was being treated as second class citizen nor have I felt that my care was less than what would be afforded to those that don't have HIV/AIDS.

Offline YaKaMein

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Re: Why do doctor's ask how you contracted HIV?
« Reply #35 on: January 12, 2009, 03:53:20 PM »
If one is ever asked a mode of transmission question when it's plainly intrusive [most would be], just opt NOT to answer it. Or, use some great responses posted here; I plan to. Patients have the right to refuse to answer any question or choose to volunteer information without repercussions to health care. I do it often.
09/11 Endocrine Consult
08/11 CD4 328 14.9% VL 0
 Disc'd Bactrim DEXA -3.1 Tscore
03/11 CD4 338 14.7% VL 0
11/10 CD4 300 14.3% VL 0 <20copies
07/10 CD4 336 14.0% VL 0 DEXA -2.7 Tscore
03/10 CD4 308 13.4% VL 0 Vit D normal
01/10 Began FOTO
11/09 CD4 274 13.7% VL 0 Chol 173 Trig 131
07/09 CD4 324 13.5% VL 0 DEXA -3.1 Tscore lumbar
03/09 CD4 207 10.9% VL 0
11/08 CD4 227 10.3% VL 0 Chol 176 Trig 156
04/08 CD4 228 9.5% VL 0
01/08 CD4 194 9.0% VL 0
09/07 CD4 176 8.3% VL 0
03/07 CD4 130 9.5% VL 0 Chol 261  Trig 227
12/06 CD4 109 6.4% VL 0
09/06 CD4  88 5.5% VL und desens'd rtd to Bactrim
08/06  Began Atripla
07/06 CD4  59 5.0% VL 145 Chol 117 Trig 104
06/06  Bactrim rash, X2 Dapsone
 EFV & Truvada Chol 128 Trig 131
05/06 CD4  6 (2.0%) VL 78667 only V179D mutation Dx PC MAC

Offline LTSurviver

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Re: Why do doctor's ask how you contracted HIV?
« Reply #36 on: January 12, 2009, 07:39:56 PM »
Like I said, maybe I'm jaded from the way I was treated 20 years ago, but from my experience, most people who ask and already know the modes of transmission are doing so to categorize you.

I am not saying all or most will treat you differently, but for what other reason is there to ask?  Honestly?  Ask most people outside the PWA/GLBT communities and they still have those two catigories for PWAs.  Even the media is guilty of it in the past.

Offline next2u

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Re: Why do doctor's ask how you contracted HIV?
« Reply #37 on: January 12, 2009, 09:38:05 PM »
shiznit. my normal doc was booked today so i had to go in for a scabies test (read related post). while there dr fuckface walked in, looked at my massive chart and proceeded to ask me questions. after i was cleared of scabies i asked him about the other lab results from my last panel. he notices that im hiv poz, starts asking me a slew of uneducated questions and generally pisses me off. yes i have an id doc, of course i know my numbers, yes i take up it the ass. and he's marking all this shit down like he's taking notes for some high school biology course. to add insult to injury i got a hold of the notes in his hands and it turns out the fucker before him sized me up to be the painted whore from biblical times. like, wow. i want to have them expunge that shit from my medical records (the DETAILS of my last sexual encounter). i didnt know the fucker was taking it for dictation, that lil bastard had a great memory. the entire conversation happened under the guise of colloquial conversation (has high risk anal sex with multiple partners...)

dont piss on my back and tell me its raining...
midapr07 - seroconversion
sept07 - tested poz
oct07 cd4 1013; vl 13,900; cd4% 41
feb08 cd4  694;  vl 16,160; cd4% 50.1
may08 cd4 546; vl 91,480; cd4% 32
aug08 cd4 576; vl 48,190; cd4% 40.7
dec08 cd4 559; vl 63,020; cd4% 29.4
feb09 cd4 464; vl 11,000; cd4% 26
may09 cd4 544; vl 29,710; cd4% 27.2
oct09 cd4 ...; vl 23,350; cd4% 31.6
mar10 cd4 408; vl 59,050; cd4% 31.4
aug10 cd4 328; vl 80,000; cd4% 19.3 STARTED ATRIPLA
oct10 cd4 423; vl 410 ;); cd4% 30.2
jun11 cd4 439; vl <20 ;); cd4% 33.8 <-Undetectable!
mar12 cd4 695; vl ud; cd4% 38.6
jan13 cd4 738; vl ud; cd4% 36.8
aug13 cd4 930; vl ud; cd4% 44.3

Offline next2u

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Re: Why do doctor's ask how you contracted HIV?
« Reply #38 on: January 12, 2009, 09:39:32 PM »
they ask because they don't have anything better to ask or say. like, how are you? or, its great you came in today, lets get this taken care of. (sorry, still bitter)
midapr07 - seroconversion
sept07 - tested poz
oct07 cd4 1013; vl 13,900; cd4% 41
feb08 cd4  694;  vl 16,160; cd4% 50.1
may08 cd4 546; vl 91,480; cd4% 32
aug08 cd4 576; vl 48,190; cd4% 40.7
dec08 cd4 559; vl 63,020; cd4% 29.4
feb09 cd4 464; vl 11,000; cd4% 26
may09 cd4 544; vl 29,710; cd4% 27.2
oct09 cd4 ...; vl 23,350; cd4% 31.6
mar10 cd4 408; vl 59,050; cd4% 31.4
aug10 cd4 328; vl 80,000; cd4% 19.3 STARTED ATRIPLA
oct10 cd4 423; vl 410 ;); cd4% 30.2
jun11 cd4 439; vl <20 ;); cd4% 33.8 <-Undetectable!
mar12 cd4 695; vl ud; cd4% 38.6
jan13 cd4 738; vl ud; cd4% 36.8
aug13 cd4 930; vl ud; cd4% 44.3

Offline red_Dragon888

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Re: Why do doctor's ask how you contracted HIV?
« Reply #39 on: January 13, 2009, 09:49:58 AM »
... to forgive, divine.
« Last Edit: January 13, 2009, 09:53:40 AM by red_Dragon888 »
http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=I3ba3lnFHik

ďNeither look forward where there is doubt nor backward where there is regret. Look inward and ask not if there is anything o

Online mecch

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Re: Why do doctor's ask how you contracted HIV?
« Reply #40 on: January 13, 2009, 10:47:43 PM »
Many reasons why a doctor or anyone might ask this question.  You need to decide how you want to answer it, or not answer it, and how to feel about the asker. 
ďFrom each, according to his ability; to each, according to his needĒ 1875 K Marx

Seadickrun

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Re: Why do doctor's ask how you contracted HIV?
« Reply #41 on: January 15, 2009, 03:13:54 PM »
All four ID's I have had have asked me this question.  It always catches me off guard because the first thing I think is that they don't know how HIV is transmitted.  I resist the temptation to tell them to read that freaking chart in front of them if they have any questions about my life and just say, "I have no idea".  Then they ask me if I use intravenous drugs.  That one offends me because I'm vain as hell and certainly don't look like some meth head.  I just smile and tell them that I'm phobic about needles and that they will have a hard time getting me into the lab for a blood draw.  You know its bad when your pharmacist tells you that your doctor won't give you any more meds until you go get another blood draw:)

Offline Jeff64

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Re: Why do doctor's ask how you contracted HIV?
« Reply #42 on: January 17, 2009, 05:01:40 AM »
Hi,
I switched to Kaiser-Permanente and will be meeting my new GP in a month.
I am going to have to to go through all these stupid questions with him before I get a referral to a new ID doc.

I had been with my old GP for years. We had a great relationship...could tell him anything. Now it is is going to be like a first date all over again.

Jeff

Seadickrun

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Re: Why do doctor's ask how you contracted HIV?
« Reply #43 on: January 17, 2009, 05:19:02 AM »
I had been with my old GP for years. We had a great relationship...could tell him anything. Now it is is going to be like a first date all over again.

Jeff

My ex wife taught me something valuable about first dates.  She said she always judged a guy by how he treated her on the first date since she believed people were always on their best behavior when they first went out.  She felt it always went downhill from there so if the first date wasn't all that she saw no reason to hope for better. 

p.s. Jeff, I love your online persona photo:)

Offline LTSurviver

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Re: Why do doctor's ask how you contracted HIV?
« Reply #44 on: January 17, 2009, 06:00:50 AM »
One thing that has made me very happy with my current ID clinic and my resent hospital stay is that not a single person has asked.  They've asked valid heathcare questions like if I take drugs and/or am sexually active and that's it.  Not even the orderlies at the hospital asked.  Usually that question is more likely to come from the students, nurses or orderlies.

It wasn't that way years ago.  I guess training has gotten better over the years.

Another thing that made me happy is that there were no bio-hazard warnings on my door at the hospital like there were years ago, though I was given a private room... but why look a gift horse in the mouth, right???  :)

Offline red_Dragon888

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Re: Why do doctor's ask how you contracted HIV?
« Reply #45 on: January 17, 2009, 08:01:59 AM »
One thing that has made me very happy with my current ID clinic and my resent hospital stay is that not a single person has asked.  They've asked valid heathcare questions like if I take drugs and/or am sexually active and that's it.  Not even the orderlies at the hospital asked.  Usually that question is more likely to come from the students, nurses or orderlies.

It wasn't that way years ago.  I guess training has gotten better over the years.

Another thing that made me happy is that there were no bio-hazard warnings on my door at the hospital like there were years ago, though I was given a private room... but why look a gift horse in the mouth, right???  :)
Yeah, that is an idea.  To get the medical people to read this and see the reactions.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=I3ba3lnFHik

ďNeither look forward where there is doubt nor backward where there is regret. Look inward and ask not if there is anything o

Offline milker

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Re: Why do doctor's ask how you contracted HIV?
« Reply #46 on: January 18, 2009, 01:16:21 PM »
- How did you contract HIV?
- With your son, at the local bathhouse, why?

Milker (who's never been asked by medical staff)
mid-dec: stupid ass
mid-jan: seroconversion
mid-feb: poz
mar 07: cd4 432 (35%) vl 54000
may 07: cd4 399 (28%) vl 27760
jul 07: cd4 403 (26%) vl 99241
oct 07: cd4 353 (24%) vl 29993
jan 08: cd4 332 (26%) vl 33308
mar 08: cd4 392 (23%) vl 75548
jun 08: cd4 325 (27%) vl 45880
oct 08: cd4 197 (20%) vl 154000 <== aids diagnosis
nov 2 08 start Atripla
nov 30 08: cd4 478 (23%) vl 1880 !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
feb 19 09: cd4 398 (24%) vl 430 getting there!
apr 23 09: cd4 604 (29%) vl 50 woohoo :D :D
jul 30 09: cd4 512 (29%) vl undetectable :D :D
may 27 10: cd4 655 (32%) vl undetectable :D :D

Now accepting applications from blowjob ninjasô

Offline red_Dragon888

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Re: Why do doctor's ask how you contracted HIV?
« Reply #47 on: January 18, 2009, 04:31:00 PM »
- How did you contract HIV?
- With your son, at the local bathhouse, why?

Milker (who's never been asked by medical staff)
rofl  :D
http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=I3ba3lnFHik

ďNeither look forward where there is doubt nor backward where there is regret. Look inward and ask not if there is anything o

Offline planonstaying

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Re: Why do doctor's ask how you contracted HIV?
« Reply #48 on: January 18, 2009, 06:48:42 PM »
 A Nurse asked me once I just said I got it like she gets a cold from another human being.  If she wasn't embarrassed she should of been
If someone tells you  potential consequences of a behavior  it  doesn't  mean they jude you or mit    they may just give a shit about you

Offline YaKaMein

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Re: Why do doctor's ask how you contracted HIV?
« Reply #49 on: January 18, 2009, 11:06:14 PM »
... so many health care UNprofessionals ...
09/11 Endocrine Consult
08/11 CD4 328 14.9% VL 0
 Disc'd Bactrim DEXA -3.1 Tscore
03/11 CD4 338 14.7% VL 0
11/10 CD4 300 14.3% VL 0 <20copies
07/10 CD4 336 14.0% VL 0 DEXA -2.7 Tscore
03/10 CD4 308 13.4% VL 0 Vit D normal
01/10 Began FOTO
11/09 CD4 274 13.7% VL 0 Chol 173 Trig 131
07/09 CD4 324 13.5% VL 0 DEXA -3.1 Tscore lumbar
03/09 CD4 207 10.9% VL 0
11/08 CD4 227 10.3% VL 0 Chol 176 Trig 156
04/08 CD4 228 9.5% VL 0
01/08 CD4 194 9.0% VL 0
09/07 CD4 176 8.3% VL 0
03/07 CD4 130 9.5% VL 0 Chol 261  Trig 227
12/06 CD4 109 6.4% VL 0
09/06 CD4  88 5.5% VL und desens'd rtd to Bactrim
08/06  Began Atripla
07/06 CD4  59 5.0% VL 145 Chol 117 Trig 104
06/06  Bactrim rash, X2 Dapsone
 EFV & Truvada Chol 128 Trig 131
05/06 CD4  6 (2.0%) VL 78667 only V179D mutation Dx PC MAC

Offline next2u

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Re: Why do doctor's ask how you contracted HIV?
« Reply #50 on: January 18, 2009, 11:49:37 PM »
comment number 50!!!!

i got it from the last dr who asked me how i got it. i guess he forgot : )
midapr07 - seroconversion
sept07 - tested poz
oct07 cd4 1013; vl 13,900; cd4% 41
feb08 cd4  694;  vl 16,160; cd4% 50.1
may08 cd4 546; vl 91,480; cd4% 32
aug08 cd4 576; vl 48,190; cd4% 40.7
dec08 cd4 559; vl 63,020; cd4% 29.4
feb09 cd4 464; vl 11,000; cd4% 26
may09 cd4 544; vl 29,710; cd4% 27.2
oct09 cd4 ...; vl 23,350; cd4% 31.6
mar10 cd4 408; vl 59,050; cd4% 31.4
aug10 cd4 328; vl 80,000; cd4% 19.3 STARTED ATRIPLA
oct10 cd4 423; vl 410 ;); cd4% 30.2
jun11 cd4 439; vl <20 ;); cd4% 33.8 <-Undetectable!
mar12 cd4 695; vl ud; cd4% 38.6
jan13 cd4 738; vl ud; cd4% 36.8
aug13 cd4 930; vl ud; cd4% 44.3

Offline PeteNYNJ

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Re: Why do doctor's ask how you contracted HIV?
« Reply #51 on: January 19, 2009, 09:41:03 PM »
Well, the last time I was at the hospital where said gastro doctor asked me these questions, I was treated like such shit from the staff I figured that was the least of my worries.

I was treated like I really didnt need to be there (hey, you admitted me - it isnt like I wanted to chill out there before Christmas), was asked if I was homeless (sorry I didnt feel up to looking my best after three days in bed), and repeatedly called by the wrong name, a real nightmare.

Now I get a fat bill to top it off...like a bad stay at a 3rd world resort. 

Offline red_Dragon888

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Re: Why do doctor's ask how you contracted HIV?
« Reply #52 on: January 20, 2009, 06:27:31 AM »
you guys are so funny.  you should take this on the road.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=I3ba3lnFHik

ďNeither look forward where there is doubt nor backward where there is regret. Look inward and ask not if there is anything o

Offline the trebmeister

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Re: Why do doctor's ask how you contracted HIV?
« Reply #53 on: September 10, 2009, 12:40:14 AM »
"A toilet seat."

usually shuts them up
Your friends may say that Iím a stranger
My face theyíll never see no more
There is but one promise thatís given
Iíll sail on Godís golden shore

Offline markaj

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Re: Why do doctor's ask how you contracted HIV?
« Reply #54 on: September 10, 2009, 05:09:15 AM »
I've never been asked by a doctor but I was once by a dentist.  She stood in between the chair and me and asked outright if I injected heroin!  I was caught off guard completely and replied "pardon?" and she then repeated the question, this time demonstrating jacking up on her arm!  I said no.  She then said "how did you get HIV?"  I just mumbled "unsafe sex."  "Oh" she said and moved out the way of the chair and ushered me to lay down on it!  If i wasn't in agony with an abscess I don't think I would have been so docile somehow!  She actually turned out to be really nice believe it or not.  Perhaps when she realised I was just a nice sweet innocent guy  :) and when she finished she put her arm around me and said I needed to try and put some weight on and was i getting help with that from my doctor.  A very weird experience. 
Infected Jan 08 / diagnosed Feb 08
Feb 08 - CD4 230 (9%) VL 3.5 million
Mar 08 - CD4 440 (6%) VL 660.000
Apr 08 - CD4 420 (11%) VL 3 million
Jun 08 - CD4 200 (7%) VL 3 million
Started Kaletra/Truvada Jul 08
Jul 08  - CD4 250 (14%) VL 23.893
Aug 08 - CD4 410 (15%)  VL 4.313
Switched to Sustiva/Truvada Aug 08
Switched to Reyataz/Norvir/Truvada Sep 08
Diagnosed with Hep C, HIV meds stopped for a bit
Nov 08 - CD4 414 (12%) VL 500.000+
Started Isentress/Truvada Nov 2008
Dec 08 - CD4 381 (17%) VL 1.116
Jan 09 - CD4 534 (20%) VL <50
Started Interferon/Ribavirin Jan 09
Feb 09 - CD4 407 (24%) VL <50
Mar 09 - CD4 360 (28%) VL <50
Apr 09 - CD4 279 (30%) VL <50
Jun 09 - CD4 298 (36%) VL <50
Aug 09 - CD4 303 (35%) VL <50

Offline Rev. Moon

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Re: Why do doctor's ask how you contracted HIV?
« Reply #55 on: September 10, 2009, 08:28:32 AM »
I got this question yesterday from my new primary care physician.  The one I had for many years "fired me" (his practice being family medicine) as he wanted someone with more knowledge about this and passed me on to this one (he is an internal medicine expert).  He is actually a very nice older fella. I guess they just ask in order to know their patients better?  Make conversation?  

"How did you contract it"? ---- me: "uh, sex"
"Are you gay or bi"? --- me: "errr... gay"
"Do you know the person?"  --- me: "erm, yeah..." (insert some question here that I don't recall about this ex-buddy of mine)

And it would have gone on had I not re-directed things back to my numbers.  Yeah, how about the weather or them effing Dolphins or Canes?   At the end (like Mark's dentist above) he put his arm around me as he directed me to his nurse to have her do an EKG and schedule me for an echo.  Oh well, an interesting new relation has started for me (I miss dr. T already :().  Let's see how things go.
« Last Edit: September 10, 2009, 08:30:10 AM by livebythemoon »
"I have tried hard--but life is difficult, and I am a very useless person. I can hardly be said to have an independent existence. I was just a screw or a cog in the great machine I called life, and when I dropped out of it I found I was of no use anywhere else."

Offline MarcoPoz

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Re: Why do doctor's ask how you contracted HIV?
« Reply #56 on: September 10, 2009, 09:33:56 AM »
Naughty language warning!!!!!!!!! If profanity offends--do NOT read on.

There MAY be valid reasons to ask this question that have to do with STD screening or further questions about substance use to consider interaction with HIV meds....BUT....

IN MY experience it has been an issue driven primarily by completely purient intrests on the part of the provider.  Here's an example.  I was driving along and thought I was having a heart attack (turned out to be vaso-spasms from stress) called my ID nurse and she told me to go to the nearest hospital and called the ER ahead for me (after trying to convince me to stop and call 911).

I get there, they meet me, crash cart--whole 9 yards (WHY do they shave your chest DRY to put those monitor tabs on?) I tell them to contact my wife and my ID doc.  They toss nitro under my tongue and wheel me into a room.  After about 10 mins., a nurse comes in and says, "Marco, I'd like to know how this happened."  To which I responded, "Well I was driving along and felt this pain.."  She interrupted and said, "No, I mean your HIV...how'd you get it?  I mean, you had me call your wife, so you're not gay, rght?  Did you shoot drugs?"

I was scared, pissed and confused.  So I told her, "Look, I'm pretty fucking busy right now, could you come back to pass judgement on me later?"

Here's a few of my patented responses when I think someone is trying to satisfy their own morbid curiosity:

-From your mother/sister/daughter
-I was using a public toilet seat and got bit by a mosquito
-I really can't remember, I was SOOOOO waisted and the first few moments of the orgy was all a blur.  Wait, you were there!
-I fucked a republican
-Ya know, green monkeys are cuter than you'd think
-My health care provider gave it to me.  Damn, she was a sweet fuck.--Can be modified to include priest, pastor etc.


Ok--just a few of my ornery responses.

If they are asking out of copmpassion and if I think my story would be benificial in any way I tell them the truth.  I was given HIV by a woman I was in love with.  She was a model and shared IDU  equipment and had sex with her HIV positive manager.  She didn't know he had HIV, I didn't know she had sex and shot up with him.  She gave me another STD which made it easier for her to pass HIV to me at the same time.  I'm 44 years old and have had 5 sex partners in my life, she was number 4.

The I sit back and watch the wheels spin again.


Offline LTSurviver

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Re: Why do doctor's ask how you contracted HIV?
« Reply #57 on: September 10, 2009, 03:37:35 PM »
Naughty language warning!!!!!!!!! If profanity offends--do NOT read on.

There MAY be valid reasons to ask this question that have to do with STD screening or further questions about substance use to consider interaction with HIV meds....BUT....

IN MY experience it has been an issue driven primarily by completely purient intrests on the part of the provider.  Here's an example.  I was driving along and thought I was having a heart attack (turned out to be vaso-spasms from stress) called my ID nurse and she told me to go to the nearest hospital and called the ER ahead for me (after trying to convince me to stop and call 911).

I get there, they meet me, crash cart--whole 9 yards (WHY do they shave your chest DRY to put those monitor tabs on?) I tell them to contact my wife and my ID doc.  They toss nitro under my tongue and wheel me into a room.  After about 10 mins., a nurse comes in and says, "Marco, I'd like to know how this happened."  To which I responded, "Well I was driving along and felt this pain.."  She interrupted and said, "No, I mean your HIV...how'd you get it?  I mean, you had me call your wife, so you're not gay, rght?  Did you shoot drugs?"

I was scared, pissed and confused.  So I told her, "Look, I'm pretty fucking busy right now, could you come back to pass judgement on me later?"

Here's a few of my patented responses when I think someone is trying to satisfy their own morbid curiosity:

-From your mother/sister/daughter
-I was using a public toilet seat and got bit by a mosquito
-I really can't remember, I was SOOOOO waisted and the first few moments of the orgy was all a blur.  Wait, you were there!
-I fucked a republican
-Ya know, green monkeys are cuter than you'd think
-My health care provider gave it to me.  Damn, she was a sweet fuck.--Can be modified to include priest, pastor etc.


Ok--just a few of my ornery responses.

If they are asking out of copmpassion and if I think my story would be benificial in any way I tell them the truth.  I was given HIV by a woman I was in love with.  She was a model and shared IDU  equipment and had sex with her HIV positive manager.  She didn't know he had HIV, I didn't know she had sex and shot up with him.  She gave me another STD which made it easier for her to pass HIV to me at the same time.  I'm 44 years old and have had 5 sex partners in my life, she was number 4.

The I sit back and watch the wheels spin again.



Thank you for posting my feelings on this so much better than I did back in January!

Online mecch

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Re: Why do doctor's ask how you contracted HIV?
« Reply #58 on: September 10, 2009, 03:56:18 PM »
Depending on the answer, the doctor might have education or medical counsel to give.  Its not necessarily unprofessional or invasive. If the doc is cool and professional, that information might help the patient, or others.
ďFrom each, according to his ability; to each, according to his needĒ 1875 K Marx

Offline Dale Parker

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Re: Why do doctor's ask how you contracted HIV?
« Reply #59 on: September 10, 2009, 10:52:10 PM »
Lots of good answers.  I have only been asked by the doctors that have tested/treated my HIV so I told them the truth. Because I`m pretty shy in person they were kind enough to ask the usual general questions in a way that only required one word answers. Even though I felt awkward about it I realize that they need to the questions so they know how to treat you.
  If anyone who doesn't`t need to know asks me how I got it I think I will take their hand, look lovingly into their eyes and and tell them to drop their pants/lift their skirt, bend over and I'll show them how I got it. That should shut them up?
  I remember the first time the doctor wanted to do a prostrate exam on me,  He told me to drop my pants and get up on the table.  I said "Not without dinner and a movie first."

Dumb question:  What's an ID Doctor?
Apr 09  CD4 21, CD4/CD8 ratio 0 VL 500,000+
July 09 CD4 158, CD4/CD812% VL 750
Oct 09 CD4 157 CD4/CD8 14% VL UD
Feb 10 CD4 197, CD4/CD8 11% VL UD
May 10  CD4 252 CD4/CD8 12% VL UD
Aug 10 CD4 211 VL UD
Nov 10 CD4 272 CD4/CD8 0.138 VL UD

Offline confidentIwillbeOK

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Re: Why do doctor's ask how you contracted HIV?
« Reply #60 on: September 10, 2009, 10:55:27 PM »
Dumb question:  What's an ID Doctor?  Infectious Disease doctor

  I remember the first time the doctor wanted to do a prostrate exam on me,  He told me to drop my pants and get up on the table.  I said "Not without dinner and a movie first."   :D 

Mine said to me..."bend over honey....pretend it is Saturday night"
« Last Edit: September 10, 2009, 10:57:25 PM by confidentIwillbeOK »

Offline Rev. Moon

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Re: Why do doctor's ask how you contracted HIV?
« Reply #61 on: September 10, 2009, 11:04:39 PM »

 I remember the first time the doctor wanted to do a prostrate exam on me,  He told me to drop my pants and get up on the table.  I said "Not without dinner and a movie first."   :D  

Mine said to me..."bend over honey....pretend it is Saturday night"

I guess male hetero-doctors get a kick out of us gay fellas when it comes to checking the prostate.  Mine, (I used to jokingly tell him that he reminded of my daddy) told me last year that "his tool might not be to my satisfaction." Whatever he meant... Eeek.
"I have tried hard--but life is difficult, and I am a very useless person. I can hardly be said to have an independent existence. I was just a screw or a cog in the great machine I called life, and when I dropped out of it I found I was of no use anywhere else."

Offline Dale Parker

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Re: Why do doctor's ask how you contracted HIV?
« Reply #62 on: September 10, 2009, 11:09:05 PM »
My doc was gay.  He took me to see Titanic and out for pizza afterwards.
Apr 09  CD4 21, CD4/CD8 ratio 0 VL 500,000+
July 09 CD4 158, CD4/CD812% VL 750
Oct 09 CD4 157 CD4/CD8 14% VL UD
Feb 10 CD4 197, CD4/CD8 11% VL UD
May 10  CD4 252 CD4/CD8 12% VL UD
Aug 10 CD4 211 VL UD
Nov 10 CD4 272 CD4/CD8 0.138 VL UD

Offline the trebmeister

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Re: Why do doctor's ask how you contracted HIV?
« Reply #63 on: September 10, 2009, 11:11:09 PM »
...
Dumb question:  What's an ID Doctor?

there are no dumb questions but some answers may be...

an ID doctor is one who has her/his staff make sure you have adequate insurance or tangible assets before bothering with you as a patient.  they make sure your ID passes the test.
Your friends may say that Iím a stranger
My face theyíll never see no more
There is but one promise thatís given
Iíll sail on Godís golden shore

Offline Dale Parker

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Re: Why do doctor's ask how you contracted HIV?
« Reply #64 on: September 10, 2009, 11:17:29 PM »
Trebmeister:  That's why I didn't know what an ID doctor was.  I'm Canadian and we get free health care.  I know it sounds good to you Americans but most of the time you get what you pay for.
Apr 09  CD4 21, CD4/CD8 ratio 0 VL 500,000+
July 09 CD4 158, CD4/CD812% VL 750
Oct 09 CD4 157 CD4/CD8 14% VL UD
Feb 10 CD4 197, CD4/CD8 11% VL UD
May 10  CD4 252 CD4/CD8 12% VL UD
Aug 10 CD4 211 VL UD
Nov 10 CD4 272 CD4/CD8 0.138 VL UD

Offline confidentIwillbeOK

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Re: Why do doctor's ask how you contracted HIV?
« Reply #65 on: September 10, 2009, 11:32:39 PM »
Dale....I hope you know he was kidding!

Infectious Disease - An infectious disease (ID) specialist is a doctor of internal medicine (or, in some cases, pediatrics) who is qualified as an expert in the diagnosis and treatment of infectious diseases. After seven or more years of medical school and postgraduate training, ID specialists complete two to three years of additional training in infectious diseases.

Moon, my doctor isn't hetero.   ;)

Offline Rev. Moon

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Re: Why do doctor's ask how you contracted HIV?
« Reply #66 on: September 10, 2009, 11:39:23 PM »

Moon, my doctor isn't hetero.   ;)

Darn, am I the only gay fella who always gets stuck with the straight docs?  Only my dentist was gay (and hot), but he never meant much whenever he asked me to open wide.
"I have tried hard--but life is difficult, and I am a very useless person. I can hardly be said to have an independent existence. I was just a screw or a cog in the great machine I called life, and when I dropped out of it I found I was of no use anywhere else."

Offline Dale Parker

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Re: Why do doctor's ask how you contracted HIV?
« Reply #67 on: September 10, 2009, 11:42:13 PM »
I did know that you were kidding.  Do your ID doctors specialize in HIV/Aids?  My current doctor is one of the top specialists in North America and specializes in HIV/Aids. He's a pretty amazing guy.
Apr 09  CD4 21, CD4/CD8 ratio 0 VL 500,000+
July 09 CD4 158, CD4/CD812% VL 750
Oct 09 CD4 157 CD4/CD8 14% VL UD
Feb 10 CD4 197, CD4/CD8 11% VL UD
May 10  CD4 252 CD4/CD8 12% VL UD
Aug 10 CD4 211 VL UD
Nov 10 CD4 272 CD4/CD8 0.138 VL UD

Offline confidentIwillbeOK

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Re: Why do doctor's ask how you contracted HIV?
« Reply #68 on: September 10, 2009, 11:44:41 PM »
Here you go:

http://www.glma.org/index.cfm?fuseaction=Page.viewPage&pageId=677&parentID=533&nodeID=1

....70,000 Gay and lesbian doctors and med students.   :D


Offline the trebmeister

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Re: Why do doctor's ask how you contracted HIV?
« Reply #69 on: September 11, 2009, 12:01:33 AM »
Trebmeister:  That's why I didn't know what an ID doctor was.  I'm Canadian and we get free health care.  I know it sounds good to you Americans but most of the time you get what you pay for.

Canadian!?!?!  the maple menace must be stopped!  the very idea of medical care for all citizens reeks of 50s communism and pod people.  our capitalist way of life is the only god-approved way and it's printed on all our money as proof.  or something.

   
Your friends may say that Iím a stranger
My face theyíll never see no more
There is but one promise thatís given
Iíll sail on Godís golden shore

Offline confidentIwillbeOK

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Re: Why do doctor's ask how you contracted HIV?
« Reply #70 on: September 11, 2009, 12:11:29 AM »
Do your ID doctors specialize in HIV/Aids?

Mine does....but I guess that not all do.  I would imagine most have some experience but there are certainly a large number that are much more experienced in HIV than ID "generalists".  A medical professional (I think it was a nurse) and and article I read recently said an ID doctor needed to have 150 HIV patients to be considered an "expert".  I bet a ton of ID docs in non-urban settings have no where near that number....

Offline Rev. Moon

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Re: Why do doctor's ask how you contracted HIV?
« Reply #71 on: September 11, 2009, 12:15:22 AM »

....70,000 Gay and lesbian doctors and med students.   :D


Seriously? Where have I been?  Gonna need to check it out since I have to make a derma appointment next month and I was not too crazy about my "everything is an allergy" previous specialist.
"I have tried hard--but life is difficult, and I am a very useless person. I can hardly be said to have an independent existence. I was just a screw or a cog in the great machine I called life, and when I dropped out of it I found I was of no use anywhere else."

Offline confidentIwillbeOK

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Re: Why do doctor's ask how you contracted HIV?
« Reply #72 on: September 11, 2009, 12:23:21 AM »
Moon, I just tested.  looked for a derm within 25 miles of me and got 4 hits...took 10 secs.  Easy search by location, specialty, gender, insurance, etc...

..working on making it 70,001 if I can get the other half through med school.   ;D



Offline positively_me

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Re: Why do doctor's ask how you contracted HIV?
« Reply #73 on: September 18, 2009, 01:34:32 PM »
i have an hmo so i don't always get to see my regular gp. i used to dread and cringe when i'd have to see a doctor other than my gp because i knew i would get asked this question.  i think some of the doctors are being nosey and others are asking because i don't fit "look like i have hive" so it shocks them that i'm infected. they also like to give me the "keep your chin up" lines about how many people are living longer lives with the disease and how much better the meds are now, blah, blah, blah...in a misguided attempt to help me feel "better" about my diagnosis.  i also think that a small percentage ask in the hopes that if you were infected from dangerous behavior, they can help you keep yourself healthier.

i've come to realize that non-ID doctors do not know much about hiv/aids beyond the basics unless they did an internship in a hiv/aids ward.  kind of like how our ID doctors wouldn't know much beyond the basics for cancer.

now i don't let it bother me when they ask. if they're being nosey, then it's their bad karma to deal with. because karma is a bitch...not a girl you want to date!   ;)
Great minds discuss ideas; Average minds discuss events; Small minds discuss people.  - Eleanor Roosevelt

Offline skeebo1969

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Re: Why do doctor's ask how you contracted HIV?
« Reply #74 on: September 19, 2009, 04:22:02 AM »


  I've only been asked this question by my HIV doctor.  I just told him unprotected sex and he didn't probe any further than that.  I think the sexual position during infection and whether there was friggin foreplay has no relevance just as much as sexual orientation..... or the damn race of my daddy..

  I always disclosed to any physician I've seen and my wife does as well.  Last year I had vision issues that had been progressively getting worse over the last 3 years, which incidentally coincided with my positive tenure .  I told the optometrist that I was positive and I also told him that I had CMV. I was very happy with the number of tests he thought necessary and his knowledge on the matter which I had learned from the forums.  In the end my eye problems had more to do with my hitting 40...... which just made turning 40 suck that much more.

  Thomas

  PS any advice on how to get over turning 40 will be greatly appreciated.

 
I despise the song Love is in the Air, you should too.

Offline Ann

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Re: Why do doctor's ask how you contracted HIV?
« Reply #75 on: September 19, 2009, 07:08:52 AM »

  PS any advice on how to get over turning 40 will be greatly appreciated.
 

Remind yourself that you're not yet 60. ;)
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"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

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Offline Miss Philicia

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Re: Why do doctor's ask how you contracted HIV?
« Reply #76 on: September 19, 2009, 11:01:48 AM »
I did know that you were kidding.  Do your ID doctors specialize in HIV/Aids?  My current doctor is one of the top specialists in North America and specializes in HIV/Aids. He's a pretty amazing guy.

Mine's not just a specialist with HIV, he's also a specialist with Hep-C (not that I need that part but...).  He's also the director of my entire clinic, and a member of the faculty at U-Penn which is an Ivy League school.  I have no idea how he manages to do all of that.
"Iíve slept with enough men to know that Iím not gay"

Offline bocker3

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Re: Why do doctor's ask how you contracted HIV?
« Reply #77 on: September 19, 2009, 11:49:01 AM »
  PS any advice on how to get over turning 40 will be greatly appreciated.

Yeah -- just remember that turning 40 beats the alternative!

Mike
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Offline skeebo1969

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Re: Why do doctor's ask how you contracted HIV?
« Reply #78 on: September 19, 2009, 01:40:06 PM »
Remind yourself that you're not yet 60. ;)
Yeah -- just remember that turning 40 beats the alternative!

Mike

  Very good points....  Maybe I should have asked how do I stop wishing I was 30. ;)
I despise the song Love is in the Air, you should too.

 


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