Quantcast

Subscribe to:
POZ magazine
Newsletters
Join POZ: Facebook MySpace Twitter Pinterest
Tumblr Google+ Flickr Instagram
POZ Personals
Sign In / Join
Username:
Password:
Welcome, Guest. Please login or register.
December 25, 2014, 06:30:55 AM

Login with username, password and session length


Members
  • Total Members: 24283
  • Latest: mineal
Stats
  • Total Posts: 650354
  • Total Topics: 49650
  • Online Today: 154
  • Online Ever: 585
  • (January 07, 2014, 02:31:47 PM)
Users Online
Users: 4
Guests: 120
Total: 124

Welcome


Welcome to the POZ/AIDSmeds Community Forums, a round-the-clock discussion area for people with HIV/AIDS, their friends/family/caregivers, and others concerned about HIV/AIDS.  Click on the links below to browse our various forums; scroll down for a glance at the most recent posts; or join in the conversation yourself by registering on the left side of this page.

Privacy Warning:  Please realize that these forums are open to all, and are fully searchable via Google and other search engines. If you are HIV positive and disclose this in our forums, then it is almost the same thing as telling the whole world (or at least the World Wide Web). If this concerns you, then do not use a username or avatar that are self-identifying in any way. We do not allow the deletion of anything you post in these forums, so think before you post.

  • The information shared in these forums, by moderators and members, is designed to complement, not replace, the relationship between an individual and his/her own physician.

  • All members of these forums are, by default, not considered to be licensed medical providers. If otherwise, users must clearly define themselves as such.

  • Forums members must behave at all times with respect and honesty. Posting guidelines, including time-out and banning policies, have been established by the moderators of these forums. Click here for “Am I Infected?” posting guidelines. Click here for posting guidelines pertaining to all other POZ/AIDSmeds community forums.

  • We ask all forums members to provide references for health/medical/scientific information they provide, when it is not a personal experience being discussed. Please provide hyperlinks with full URLs or full citations of published works not available via the Internet. Additionally, all forums members must post information which are true and correct to their knowledge.

  • Product advertisement—including links; banners; editorial content; and clinical trial, study or survey participation—is strictly prohibited by forums members unless permission has been secured from POZ.

To change forums navigation language settings, click here (members only), Register now

Para cambiar sus preferencias de los foros en español, haz clic aquí (sólo miembros), Regístrate ahora

Finished Reading This? You can collapse this or any other box on this page by clicking the symbol in each box.

Welcome to Am I Infected

IMPORTANT UPDATE
Posted Tuesday, August 28, 2012

Welcome to the "Am I Infected?" POZ forum.

New members -- those who have posted three or fewer messages -- are permitted to post questions and responses, free of charge (make them count!). Ongoing participation in the "Am I Infected?" forum -- posting more than three questions or responses -- requires a paid subscription.

A seven-day subscription is $9.99, a 30-day subscription is $14.99 and a 90-day subscription is $24.99.

Anyone who needs to post more than three messages in the "Am I Infected?" forum -- including past, present and future POZ Forums members -- will need to subscribe, with secure payments made via PayPal.

There will be no charge to continue reading threads in the "Am I Infected?" forum, nor will there be a charge for participating in any of the Main Forums; Meds, Mind, Body & Benefits; and Off Topic Forums. Similarly, all POZ and AIDSmeds pages, including our "How is HIV Transmitted?" and "Am I Infected? (A Guide to Testing for HIV)" lessons, will remain accessible to all. 

NOTE: HIV testing questions will still need to be posted in the "Am I Infected?" forum; attempts to post HIV symptoms or testing questions in any other forums will be considered violations of our rules of membership and subject to time-outs and permanent bans.

To learn how to upgrade your Forums account to participate beyond three posts in the "Am I Infected?" Forum, please click here.

Thank you for your understanding and future support of the best online support service for people living with, affected by and at risk for HIV.

Author Topic: Please judge my risk  (Read 4225 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Offline FlirtAnthony

  • Member
  • Posts: 14
Please judge my risk
« on: April 12, 2009, 03:50:09 PM »
Hi Everyone.

I had about 8 sexual encounters with prostitutes in last 8 months. All protected
with condom. However, most of the time, i never checked them for leakage and the lights were off. Experts at Medhelp told me that i would have known had the condoms been damagaed.
Other exposures include receiving oral sex(without ejaculation), deep kiss and nipple sucking.

Please judge my risk scenario, am i at certain risk?
I know that sexually active people should be tested at regular intervals, but do i need to worry about my exposures listed above?

Offline Ann

  • Administrator
  • Member
  • Posts: 28,140
  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: Please judge my risk
« Reply #1 on: April 12, 2009, 03:52:15 PM »
Anthony,

You certainly were NOT at risk in what you describe. The people at Medhelp were correct.

Ann

Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline FlirtAnthony

  • Member
  • Posts: 14
Re: Please judge my risk
« Reply #2 on: April 12, 2009, 04:11:31 PM »
Hi Ann,

Thank You so much.
I have a concern here. Actually, earlier, i didnt know that using two condoms is like setting them up for a potential failure.
I used 2 condoms at a time in each of these acts. How much risk that increases now?
Request you to please respond.

Offline Andy Velez

  • Global Moderator
  • Member
  • Posts: 25,409
Re: Please judge my risk
« Reply #3 on: April 12, 2009, 05:03:57 PM »
If the double condoms had failed it would have been visually quite apparent. You were lucky they didn't.

A single latex condom will do the job quite nicely of protecting you. Doubling them actually can cause breakage which I think you realize. So don't do it again.

Still no cause to be concerned about your 8 incidents with condoms.
Andy Velez

Offline FlirtAnthony

  • Member
  • Posts: 14
Re: Please judge my risk
« Reply #4 on: April 13, 2009, 01:26:56 AM »
Thank You so much.

I am going in for a test on 16th, which would be at slightly more than 6 weeks past my last exposure.
Do i have any reason to be afraid?
All the experts have been telling me continuously tha i had no risk, but i cant throw out the what if feelings from my mind.

Offline FlirtAnthony

  • Member
  • Posts: 14
Re: Please judge my risk
« Reply #5 on: April 13, 2009, 01:27:59 AM »
And finally, was it a low risk or NO risk? Also, at most of the times, i didn't check the condoms for failure and also that the lights were off. Is it possible that they would have failed without me feeling them fail?

You guys are doing awesome work here. Would love to help you in my capacity
« Last Edit: April 13, 2009, 01:29:30 AM by FlirtAnthony »

Offline Ann

  • Administrator
  • Member
  • Posts: 28,140
  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: Please judge my risk
« Reply #6 on: April 13, 2009, 05:08:05 AM »
Anthony,

Protected intercourse is NO RISK.

Sex workers use condoms to protect themselves. If the condom had broken, she would have noticed and said something. You're letting your imagination run away with you.

Use condoms, correctly and consistently, and you will avoid hiv infection. It really is that simple. Read through all three condom and lube links in my signature line so you can use them with confidence.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline FlirtAnthony

  • Member
  • Posts: 14
Re: Please judge my risk
« Reply #7 on: April 13, 2009, 03:05:43 PM »
Thank You so much Ann and Andy.

I am almost sure now at i wasn't at ANY RISK.
But you know these what if's are driving me crazy. Like what if the condoms had got damaged(since i used 2 at time) and we didnt notice and blah blah blah.
Can i expect a negative result?

Offline Andy Velez

  • Global Moderator
  • Member
  • Posts: 25,409
Re: Please judge my risk
« Reply #8 on: April 13, 2009, 03:12:31 PM »
Yes,  you can expect a negative test result.

And you can also expect to be nervous between now and when you test because that's how we human beings are wired. But those are feelings. The facts of your situation point to expecting a negative result.
Andy Velez

Offline FlirtAnthony

  • Member
  • Posts: 14
Re: Please judge my risk
« Reply #9 on: April 13, 2009, 03:20:52 PM »
Thank You so much Andy. Will post the test results coming saturday.

And yeah, what a nervous time i am having at the moment even though i, now, know that it's okay. I have loaded myself with lots of work in office currently so that i remain busy and dont have much time to think about. But it keeps on revolving in my head always.
As you said: That's how we humans are wired.  :)


Offline Andy Velez

  • Global Moderator
  • Member
  • Posts: 25,409
Re: Please judge my risk
« Reply #10 on: April 13, 2009, 05:44:11 PM »
Good move on the office work.

I'll wish you good luck with the your test even though I regard a negative as a slam dunk.
Andy Velez

Offline FlirtAnthony

  • Member
  • Posts: 14
Re: Please judge my risk
« Reply #11 on: April 13, 2009, 07:43:29 PM »
Hi Andy, Ann, Rod

Read this BS.

Excerpt:One author, very reasonably claims that from an “epidemiological” perspective, an HIV/AIDS infected person having “protected” sex seven times, negates any protection a condom might offer. This means that safe sex becomes even more serious with repeated condom use. A person that persists in playing Russian Roulette will eventually kill himself, in the same way that a person that persists in having sexual relations protected by a condom with someone infected with HIV/AIDS.

http://www.hli.org/press_releases_vatican_debates_condom_use.html

Do these people know what they are talking about? Then why in the world did they invented condoms?
Please give your opinions on the subject?

I believe that i will have to surrender my internet connection asap.
« Last Edit: April 13, 2009, 07:45:19 PM by FlirtAnthony »

Offline RapidRod

  • Member
  • Posts: 15,288
Re: Please judge my risk
« Reply #12 on: April 13, 2009, 07:55:03 PM »
It doesn't suprise me where you found the info. You're right, it is bull shit.

Offline FlirtAnthony

  • Member
  • Posts: 14
Re: Please judge my risk
« Reply #13 on: April 13, 2009, 08:08:26 PM »
LOL..

You know the mind starts playing games, what if the condoms broke and we didnt notice, What if even after protected sex, i might be the unlucky one and blah blah blah

And why do some people that they contracted HIV even after they had protected sex at all times?
« Last Edit: April 13, 2009, 11:08:11 PM by FlirtAnthony »

Offline Ann

  • Administrator
  • Member
  • Posts: 28,140
  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: Please judge my risk
« Reply #14 on: April 14, 2009, 06:31:15 AM »
Anthony,

The website you linked to is Human Life International - Pro-life Missionaries to the World.  Of course they're going to tell you lies about condoms, they don't want you to use them because amongst other things, they stop babies being born. These people are all about butts on pews and money in coffers. Ironically, they don't care how many adults they kill with their anti-condom unscientific lies. They sure want your babies though, because little children are malleable and they hope they'll turn out to be church-brainwashed adults - even if the parents are "sinners" who use condoms.

Some people might CLAIM they became infected even after using condoms all the time, but this never holds up to scientific scrutiny. Some people lie, some people forgot the details of what happened while under the influence of drink and/or drugs. Some people might use them consistently, but don't use them correctly. Incorrectly used condoms tend to break. (Have you read the condom and lube links in my signature line like I asked you to?)

Intact condoms have been PROVEN to prevent hiv infection. There have been long-term studies of couples where one is positive and one is negative. In the couples who used condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, but no barrier for oral activities, not one of the negative partners became infected with hiv. Not one. These studies involved hundreds of couples and went for as many as ten years. This is the science concerning condoms. What people might claim about their infection on an internet forum, or the lies a religious organisation puts out about condoms, are NOT science. It's bullshit.

Keep posting about this NO RISK situation and you'll be given a time out. If you've read the posting guidelines found in the Welcome Thread before posting like you're supposed to, you'll know what I'm talking about.

Please consider yourself warned.

Ann
« Last Edit: April 14, 2009, 06:32:50 AM by Ann »
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline FlirtAnthony

  • Member
  • Posts: 14
Re: Please judge my risk
« Reply #15 on: April 14, 2009, 08:08:50 AM »
My sincere apologies Ann, i would try to stick to the rules of the forum.
Its was just a bout of over anxiety running through my spine.
Thank You all for everything.

Offline FlirtAnthony

  • Member
  • Posts: 14
Re: Please judge my risk
« Reply #16 on: April 16, 2009, 11:34:22 PM »
Hi Ann, Andy, Rod and everyone

I went in for a test yesterday. 46 days past exposure and i got the results just 20 minutes back.
It was  rapid blood test and came out NON-REACTIVE !!!!
The first thing that i am doing after returning from the hospital is logging on the board to express
my deepest gratitude to you guys. If it weren't for you guys, i wouldn't have been able to take this test.
In fact, i was scared to go to hospital. But yesterday i was browsing through the forum and read Ann say to someone in the same situation that THERE IS LIFE ON EITHER SIDES..LIFE MOVES ON WITH HIV and that gave me the courage to pick myself up.

You might be wondering that i panicked even when each one of you described it as a NO-RISK situation.
I too am looking out for answers. My mind had started playing games with me. I am relieved of anxiety now but it will take some time for the reality to sink in.

I have one little question here: Can i move on with my life after this 46 days test? It was a rapid test in which they drew blood from my arm, can i take this as conclusive? Though, i am at ease now and dont intend to take any more tests. However, please advise if i need to?

Guys, thank you for everything. Wish you the very best in life.

-Anthony, India
« Last Edit: April 16, 2009, 11:55:29 PM by FlirtAnthony »

Offline Ann

  • Administrator
  • Member
  • Posts: 28,140
  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: Please judge my risk
« Reply #17 on: April 17, 2009, 05:54:25 AM »
Anthony,

Yes, you can move on now. Your test is conclusive as you never put yourself at risk for hiv.

If you find yourself continuing to worry, please seek out counseling. You do NOT have hiv. Keep using condoms, correctly and consistently, and you won't have hiv in future either.

It's definitely time for you to move on with your life. You don't have hiv and you don't need further testing - unless it's in a years time strictly as a part of a regular, annual sexual health care check-up.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline FlirtAnthony

  • Member
  • Posts: 14
Re: Please judge my risk
« Reply #18 on: April 20, 2009, 04:09:18 PM »
Hi Ann, Andy, Rod

Sorry to bother you guys again but i am not here out of anxiety now. I am pretty much relaxed and
have been trying to move on with my life and have been pretty successful.
Actually, my parents want my marriage to be fixed soon. Now, is any any reason on earth for me to worry about HIV? Can i just forget everything and go on with my marriage? Are you guys sure i do not need any further testing or do i need to test at 3 months? Should hiv be on my mind now and in teh future over these incidents?

Thank You so much. This would pretty much make my last post here.

Offline RapidRod

  • Member
  • Posts: 15,288
Re: Please judge my risk
« Reply #19 on: April 20, 2009, 04:21:23 PM »
Go back an reread the replies you have been given.

Offline Andy Velez

  • Global Moderator
  • Member
  • Posts: 25,409
Re: Please judge my risk
« Reply #20 on: April 20, 2009, 05:09:09 PM »
Fears, doubts and thougts are not facts.

A test result is a fact. And you have a negative one which is no surprise since you didn't do anything that put you at risk for HIV.

Just because you may continue to have such worrisome thoughts doesn't change the facts of your siituation. You have no cause to be concerned any further about HIV.

You know, here's a random thought. Often the approach of marriage can stir a lot of anxiety. Perhaps that is an underlying cause of some of what you have been experiencing. Like I said, just a thought.

As far as HIV is concerned you just need to get on with your life.

Cheers.
Andy Velez

Offline FlirtAnthony

  • Member
  • Posts: 14
Re: Please judge my risk
« Reply #21 on: July 15, 2009, 01:05:23 PM »
Hi Ann, Andy, RapidRod

I am feeling ashamed and sorry for coming back with the exposures i had recently.
I did not learn from my mistakes and did it again.

I had 5 exposures with CSWs recently, all with condoms.
We also indulged in lots of intense foreplay.

Please help me out.

Hope you won't mind and you would also not ban me for this.
Thank You so Much

Offline Andy Velez

  • Global Moderator
  • Member
  • Posts: 25,409
Re: Please judge my risk
« Reply #22 on: July 15, 2009, 01:12:26 PM »
The matter of foreplay is irrelevant. You've indicated that condoms were used each time for intercourse. That's all that really matters in terms of protection from HIV transmission.

There's no need for further concern on your part nor for getting tested for HIV.

As for your emotional problems about this, we can't help you with that. See a therapist or other professional to get that sorted out.

Andy Velez

Offline Ann

  • Administrator
  • Member
  • Posts: 28,140
  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: Please judge my risk
« Reply #23 on: July 15, 2009, 01:12:55 PM »
Anthony,

Help you out with what? We're not here to hold your hand every time you have sex. We've already told you - repeatedly - that condoms prevent hiv infection. Foreplay is also not a risk for hiv infection. It's high time you learned what we tell you and start applying it to your own life.

Come back with more questions and whatiffs about these NO RISK incidents and you WILL be given a time out.

Please consider yourself warned for the LAST time!

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline FlirtAnthony

  • Member
  • Posts: 14
Re: Please judge my risk
« Reply #24 on: July 15, 2009, 01:15:56 PM »
Thank you so much Andy.

Thank you so much Ann. Sorry for being such a fool and wasting your time.

Thanks for everything. May be i need to calm down my unrealistic fears.

Offline FlirtAnthony

  • Member
  • Posts: 14
Re: Please judge my risk
« Reply #25 on: August 27, 2009, 03:42:51 PM »
Hi All,

I am here to just ask you something and i promise it would be for the last time.

Since my last exposures, i took an HIV test and came out fine as repeatedly told by you.

I have a question if you could please help me with.

After those events, i stopped having intercourses with strippers.
But i have a high intensity sex drive, so i decided to play it safe (thats what i think).

I have been to message parlours/strippers a couple of times but did not engage in any sort of anal or vaginal sex. What i did was receiving protected orals, some kisses on mouth and kissing and enjoying our bodies. We were always wearing our undies all the time.

Would this form any sort of a risk? Are these activities entirely low risk or essentially non-risk activites, even if performed on a confirmed positive partner? And given i had these activities a number of time with different massage girls/strippers.

That would be all. Thank you so much for everything. Now you muct be knowing that i am a bad boy and i have started receiving help for my high sex desires from my health care provider.

Offline Andy Velez

  • Global Moderator
  • Member
  • Posts: 25,409
Re: Please judge my risk
« Reply #26 on: August 27, 2009, 04:31:31 PM »
You've been coming here long enough to know that none of your latest activities would put you at risk.

I'm going to give you that 28 day Time Out which Ann warned you about repeatedly.

You seem to just want us to indulge in your secret pleasures at being a "bad boy" as you categorized yourself. You're just not going to include wasting our time for a while with your bad boy silliness. Don't try to get around the Time Out by creating a new name for yourself because that will be spotted right off and it would get you banned from the site permanently.

Keep using condoms for intercourse and stop having sex altogether if you can't handle the aftereffects.
Andy Velez

 


Terms of Membership for these forums
 

© 2014 Smart + Strong. All Rights Reserved.   terms of use and your privacy
Smart + Strong® is a registered trademark of CDM Publishing, LLC.