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Author Topic: boyfriend and I have different needs  (Read 4232 times)

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Offline HollyStar

  • Member
  • Posts: 344
boyfriend and I have different needs
« on: December 22, 2008, 01:19:28 AM »
Hi everyone,

I just read the art of healthful eating thread. It has some great ideas that I would like to try. The reason I am posting this is that my boyfriend, 6 feet 4 inches at about 165 (his weight can vary by about 10 pounds) needs to keep his weight on and could use gaining even more, though it is difficult for him. Myself on the other hand, am at 5 feet 6 inches and about 135-140 pounds. I know that doesn't sound like much but I have a nice size tire around my waist nowadays. I will most likely be starting Atripla soon and have read that you can put on weight in the beginning.
So, my boyfriend needs to keep or put on weight and I need to lose weight. Well I would like to become lean anyway, the number doesn't matter as much as being fit. I just don't know how to cook for his needs and mine in one meal. And there is no way he will cook for himself, so....what do I do? I hope this isn't a stupid question.
Diagnosed  July 28th 2003

'I don't want to get to the end of my life and find that I just lived the length of it. I want to have lived the width of it as well.' -Diande Ackerman

'Why not go out on a limb? Isn't that where the fruit is?' -Frank Scully

'If your ship doesn't come, swim out to it.' - Jonathan Winters

Offline Oceanbeach

  • Member
  • Posts: 3,565
Re: boyfriend and I have different needs
« Reply #1 on: December 22, 2008, 03:55:03 PM »
Hey Hollystar,

A long time ago, I had my health care through the same organization you have, only in Lake County.  At MCHC Lakeside Clinic we did not have a Nutricianist, or an ID doc for that matter either but, I did get a referral to the Center for HIV Prevention and Care in Santa Rosa for a nutrician problem.  I was so impressed with that meeting, I moved to Sonoma County and the difference in quality of care in The Center for HIV Prevention and Care and MCHC is mind boggling.  May I recommend you see your Case Manager and schedule a referral to see Lisa Lambiase at the Center?   ;D  Have the best day
Michael

 

Offline HollyStar

  • Member
  • Posts: 344
Re: boyfriend and I have different needs
« Reply #2 on: December 24, 2008, 01:50:30 AM »
Thanks Michael! I'm surprised this county even has an ID Specialist but he is a good one. As far as other services, I know what you mean, they are lacking. Do you know if CMSP would cover outside this county? I don't think it will. Maybe title 3 will cover it? Thanks again for the suggestion.
Diagnosed  July 28th 2003

'I don't want to get to the end of my life and find that I just lived the length of it. I want to have lived the width of it as well.' -Diande Ackerman

'Why not go out on a limb? Isn't that where the fruit is?' -Frank Scully

'If your ship doesn't come, swim out to it.' - Jonathan Winters

Offline Peter Staley

  • Member
  • Posts: 1,337
  • Founder & Advisory Editor, AIDSmeds.com
    • AIDSmeds.com
Re: boyfriend and I have different needs
« Reply #3 on: December 24, 2008, 05:52:08 PM »
Hollystar -- from everything I've ever read on diets that either increase or decrease weight, the thing that matters most is total calories.  While what you eat matters to an extent, the real thing that matters is how much you eat.

So you could probably do fine with cooking the same thing for both of you.  The bf can eat all he wants, and you'll need to use portion control.

Offline HollyStar

  • Member
  • Posts: 344
Re: boyfriend and I have different needs
« Reply #4 on: December 24, 2008, 07:15:21 PM »
Thanks Peter! Portion control is an issue for me. I'm trying to improve, but it is hard. Your suggestion of my bf eating more and me eating less is so simple, I kind of feel like an idiot for not considering it as part of the solution, LOL. Ah, the simple things in life. We will be working on it. Thanks again guys. :-*
Diagnosed  July 28th 2003

'I don't want to get to the end of my life and find that I just lived the length of it. I want to have lived the width of it as well.' -Diande Ackerman

'Why not go out on a limb? Isn't that where the fruit is?' -Frank Scully

'If your ship doesn't come, swim out to it.' - Jonathan Winters

Offline Oceanbeach

  • Member
  • Posts: 3,565
Re: boyfriend and I have different needs
« Reply #5 on: December 25, 2008, 10:18:48 PM »
Do you know if CMSP would cover outside this county? I don't think it will. Maybe title 3 will cover it? Thanks again for the suggestion.

They will cover the costs if you are referred by your Case Manager.  There is also a Nurse at CCHAP named Onnie.  She is in semi-retirement and came from one of the big HIV clinics in San Jose.  They say, "Onnie gets it done."  CCHAP does see Willits clients and if she is still working, you could see her.   ;D  Have the best day
Michael


Seadickrun

  • Guest
Re: boyfriend and I have different needs
« Reply #6 on: December 26, 2008, 05:05:46 PM »
Switch your dinner plate to a salad plate for all of your meals.  Wait 15-30 minutes after eating a plate and decide if you are STILL hungry, then refill. 

Graze on food all day (nuts, fruit, veggies, whatever) so that you don't sit down at dinner and eat like its your last meal.  Try and keep healthy choices already cooked and in the fridge to microwave - this reduces the urge to bust open a bag of chips when you're hungry right now and don't feel like cooking. 

For your bf, try protein shakes.

  • banana
  • big spoonful peanut butter
  • something chocolate (chips, syrup, etc.)
  • milk, condensed milk, yogurt, or ice cream
  • protein powder
  • optional - Brewyer's Yeast (lots of b-vitamins but go easy or it tastes horrible - its an acquired taste. Try one tablespoon to start)

Offline HollyStar

  • Member
  • Posts: 344
Re: boyfriend and I have different needs
« Reply #7 on: December 26, 2008, 07:06:52 PM »
Thanks for those suggestions. Whenever I eat Mexican food, I eat like it is my last meal. I like the salad plate idea as that will really help with the portion control. The Shake recipe looks good and I think my bf will like it. Thanks hon. :-*
Diagnosed  July 28th 2003

'I don't want to get to the end of my life and find that I just lived the length of it. I want to have lived the width of it as well.' -Diande Ackerman

'Why not go out on a limb? Isn't that where the fruit is?' -Frank Scully

'If your ship doesn't come, swim out to it.' - Jonathan Winters

Offline Oceanbeach

  • Member
  • Posts: 3,565
Re: boyfriend and I have different needs
« Reply #8 on: December 26, 2008, 07:47:15 PM »
Whenever I eat Mexican food

Mexican food in Willits?  You must have been to the restaurant on South Main that was once called Gribaldos?  It belongs to Rogelio and Laney (my niece).  I have never been there but then again, haven't seen my nieces since they were little either.  How is the food there?  There was a place called El Mexicano in that old "country mall" building.  They were one of the wonders of the world about a hundred years ago.   ;D  Have the best day
Michael 

Offline HollyStar

  • Member
  • Posts: 344
Re: boyfriend and I have different needs
« Reply #9 on: December 27, 2008, 01:13:43 AM »
Hey Michael,

I think there is about 4 or 5 Mexican places in town and a couple of them are very good and authentic. El Mexicano is good but not really authentic and it's next to the old mall now. The 'old mall' has been renovated into one big store. I have eaten at Gribaldos a few times, it's umm OK, your average cafe food. It used to be on highway 20 but moved to south main years ago. You might be surprised what is in this town now days. If you ever happen to come up this way, I'll show you the sights (the tour will take only 5 minutes lol).
Diagnosed  July 28th 2003

'I don't want to get to the end of my life and find that I just lived the length of it. I want to have lived the width of it as well.' -Diande Ackerman

'Why not go out on a limb? Isn't that where the fruit is?' -Frank Scully

'If your ship doesn't come, swim out to it.' - Jonathan Winters

Offline Oceanbeach

  • Member
  • Posts: 3,565
Re: boyfriend and I have different needs
« Reply #10 on: December 27, 2008, 02:03:24 AM »
(the tour will take only 5 minutes lol).

What! The Grand Tour still takes only 5 minutes? I was going to go up there a couple of years ago.  Cold Blood was doing a reunion tour and was booked at the Rec Grove and then, I thought about Lydia Pense, (now in her 60's), singing, "I just want to make love to you" and I thought memories of Winterland were better left in another decade.   ;D  Have the best day
Michael

Offline HollyStar

  • Member
  • Posts: 344
Re: boyfriend and I have different needs
« Reply #11 on: December 27, 2008, 03:15:51 PM »
LMAO Micheal!!!
Diagnosed  July 28th 2003

'I don't want to get to the end of my life and find that I just lived the length of it. I want to have lived the width of it as well.' -Diande Ackerman

'Why not go out on a limb? Isn't that where the fruit is?' -Frank Scully

'If your ship doesn't come, swim out to it.' - Jonathan Winters

Offline Oceanbeach

  • Member
  • Posts: 3,565
Re: boyfriend and I have different needs
« Reply #12 on: December 27, 2008, 04:58:59 PM »
Hey Michael,

I have eaten at Gribaldos a few times, it's umm OK, your average cafe food. It used to be on highway 20 but moved to south main years ago. 

Gribaldos was first opened on South Main in the 60's, Mary Gribaldo had lived next door and her daughter was the "baby sitter"for awhile.  She opened the cafe with Virgil and we called them Virge N Mary.  I had been told my niece and her husband had turned the original truck stop cafe into a Mexican restaurant.  I haven't been around my family for a couple of decades but... here is a recipe from my childhood.

Burritos
Get one of those round steaks, cut into cubes, chop some onion, a clove of Garlic and brown in a cast iron skillet.

Add Salt, Pepper, Chili Powder and some Cayenne pepper and Cumin to taste.

Add one of those small cans of diced Green Peppers and a 16 oz can of Tomato Sauce.  Cover and cook for about a hour, stirring every once in awhile.  Wrap it up in flour tortillas.   ;D  Have the best day
Michael

Offline HollyStar

  • Member
  • Posts: 344
Re: boyfriend and I have different needs
« Reply #13 on: December 27, 2008, 10:49:59 PM »
That actually sounds pretty darn tasty. I think I might just have to write that one down. Thanks Micheal!
Diagnosed  July 28th 2003

'I don't want to get to the end of my life and find that I just lived the length of it. I want to have lived the width of it as well.' -Diande Ackerman

'Why not go out on a limb? Isn't that where the fruit is?' -Frank Scully

'If your ship doesn't come, swim out to it.' - Jonathan Winters

Seadickrun

  • Guest
Re: boyfriend and I have different needs
« Reply #14 on: December 28, 2008, 08:32:27 AM »
Thanks for those suggestions. Whenever I eat Mexican food, I eat like it is my last meal. I like the salad plate idea as that will really help with the portion control. The Shake recipe looks good and I think my bf will like it. Thanks hon. :-*

The smaller plate idea hit me a few years ago when I ordered a seafood platter dinner at a local pub.  Out came a large platter-plate mounded high with fried fish, fried clams, fried shrimp, french fries, and a side salad, a plate of Texas toast (and a huge Coke).  As I looked at that plate, I tried to picture it against my 6'3" torso.  It would have gone from my neck to my waist and from side to side.  I then had no problem understanding why I couldn't get rid of my gut as I pictured sharing that plate of food with my lungs, kidneys, liver, etc.  So, I started using smaller plates and quit stuffing and it made a huge difference. I'm now 175 lbs at 6'3" and have never looked better. 

My other "diet" tip - never rule out dessert.  Going without dessert is like foregoing sex for the rest of one's life - not going to happen.  I love chocolate, especially cake but I only eat the richest, highest quality.  Forget ding-dongs, Hershey bars, etc. They are poor quality but still just as high in fat so if I am going to feel guilty about dessert, its gotta to be gooooood.  No, nothing but a luscious-four-layer-worthy-of-Martha-Stewart cake for me but before diving into dessert, I eat something healthy first to take off that hunger edge.  By doing this, I literally eat all the cake I want but I just want less.  When I was married, I wouldn't think twice about eating half a German Chocolate cake in one sitting but I couldn't fathom doing that now. 

If you want to do protein shakes for yourself, skip the chocolate and use frozen fruit and enough skim milk to thin it out in the blender.  My roommate drinks these shakes everytime I make them and he literally eats nothing but frozen pizza and fritos.  He's worse than a four year old but he slams down the shakes...if I make them:)

 


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