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Author Topic: Att Andy,and mods I cannot continue on like this  (Read 2614 times)

0 Members and 2 Guests are viewing this topic.

Offline Enoughs Enough

  • Member
  • Posts: 7
Att Andy,and mods I cannot continue on like this
« on: November 16, 2008, 09:34:36 PM »
Hi There,

Firstly id like to praise the people on this forum Andy, Rod, Ann and anyone i may have missed I truly believe you are fantastic people who help people like myself overcome these fears.

A little background on my self I have a ridiculous worry of Hiv and cannot seem to get it out of my head, I have seen a counsellor and been put on medication to help and it has done so greatly. But always seem to become overly depressed and worried please help me

My non risk exposure is due to going to massage parlours as this is the only way I can get what i need as the relationship I am in with my GF is complicated as thier is no sex before marriage which is fine as i love her more than anything.

In the last 7 Months I have had 9 tests all negative,

My only exposure is a handjob off the girls at the massage parlours, i have not had any unprotected sex with any girls at all nor have i ever done any drugs.

So i am hoping to ask a few questions that you could PLEASE answer and give a bit of detail in to WHY it is not a risk.

Firstly, is a massage parlour safe as long as their is no episodes of risky behaviours?

Second of all WHY is it not possible to catch HIV from a handjob ? Has their been any research in to this?

Thirdly they use massage oil at a parlour and they have a shower before and after every client, is it known weather oil or water would kill the virus outside of the body?

Also another worry i got was me walking on the floor and and walking on someones semen, can this at all be a risk? or the bottle she used to put oil on me having semen on the top of it from someone else and infecting me:

i read the exposure lesson and it said in the entire 25 year epidemic there has been no other exposure other than the 4 mentioned, Anal, vaginal, needlesharing, breast feeding, is this still the case?

I am doing this to finally try and put my head at ease for once and for all it has taken its toll on me dreadfully. The good news for you guys is that I have read this forum long enough and wont be questioning your answers and asking what if questions. as they must drive you mad and rightfully so.

Once again, thank you so much you wonderful people,

Regards

« Last Edit: November 17, 2008, 09:36:47 AM by Enoughs Enough »

Offline RapidRod

  • Member
  • Posts: 15,286
Re: Please Give me Closure
« Reply #1 on: November 16, 2008, 11:45:42 PM »
Take the time to read the lessons on transmission. You can find the link in the "Welcome" thread.

Offline Enoughs Enough

  • Member
  • Posts: 7
Re: Please Give me Closure
« Reply #2 on: November 17, 2008, 01:31:21 AM »
Take the time to read the lessons on transmission. You can find the link in the "Welcome" thread.

I mentioned I have read that Rod and would BE VERY APPRECIATIVE of some personal opinions of Andy yourself and Ann if possible re my questions.

Cheers

Offline jkinatl2

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  • Posts: 6,007
  • Doo. Dah. Dipp-ity.
Re: Please Give me Closure
« Reply #3 on: November 17, 2008, 01:51:46 AM »
Not that mine is an opinion that matters, but what you report is absolutely no risk insofar as HIV in concerned, a fact which would have indeed presented itself had you read the LESSONS, which both Andy and Ann had a role in creating.

Notwithstanding, even had you had unprotected penetrative sex, a test taken at three months past the last exposure (remember, yours was not) is considered conclusive.

Your problems do not include an HIV infection.

"Many people, especially in the gay community, turn to oral sex as a safer alternative in the age of AIDS. And with HIV rates rising, people need to remember that oral sex is safer sex. It's a reasonable alternative."

-Kimberly Page-Shafer, PhD, MPH

Welcome Thread

Offline Enoughs Enough

  • Member
  • Posts: 7
Re: Please Give me Closure, killing me
« Reply #4 on: November 18, 2008, 08:23:34 AM »
Andy, Ann??

Can someone please help me re my questions?

Maybe to make it simpler,

Is it possible to contract HIV from a massage parlour via a handjob and im worried that the oil bottle touched the head of my penis?? Please help me alleviate my fears. Why would this not be a risk?

Another question would OIL or WATER kill the virus in semen?

Also has their been any research in to why HIV is cant be transmitted via a Hand Job or do they get the evidence from the fact that no one has caiught it that way.

Please help

Offline Andy Velez

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  • Member
  • Posts: 24,597
Re: Please Give me Closure, killing me
« Reply #5 on: November 18, 2008, 04:20:28 PM »
It doesn't matter who did what using what to you when masturbating, touching or massaging you. Absolutely none of that represents any possible risk for HIV transmission.

You are worrying needlessly.

What you need to remember is that as long as you consistently use latex condoms for intercourse, vaginal and anal, you are well and truly protected as far as HIV transmission is concerned. All of the other sexual activities, no matter what your mind says to the contrary, are really only risky in theory. HIV is a fragile virus that needs the kind of receptive setting provided by a vagina or an anus to be transmitted.

This time you have no cause for further concern nor any need for testing.

Cheers.
Andy Velez

Offline Enoughs Enough

  • Member
  • Posts: 7
Re: Please Give me Closure, killing me
« Reply #6 on: November 18, 2008, 09:09:43 PM »
Thank You Andy,

Very much appreciated, Your a great person

Offline Andy Velez

  • Global Moderator
  • Member
  • Posts: 24,597
Re: Please Give me Closure, killing me
« Reply #7 on: November 19, 2008, 08:02:22 AM »
You're welcome. Glad you found the exchange to be helpful.

And forget about what people call "closure" these days. What they really mean is they're having feelings they don't like and want to shop for different ones. Feelings aren't facts. They're....feelings. The FACTS of this situation point to your not having been at risk. So feel your feelings, notice them and keep moving on.

Cheers. 
Andy Velez

Offline Enoughs Enough

  • Member
  • Posts: 7
Att Andy,and mods I cannot continue on like this
« Reply #8 on: January 03, 2009, 09:27:00 AM »
Hi again guys,

I really need some help trying to get over my clear phobia of hiv, I have started taking zoloft to try and reduce the anxiety but still lingering a bit. and drives me to not wanting tolive no more, I am definitely going to seek a physciatrist to help get over this.

Now in brief, my concern is that i cannot help myself and i go to Massage parlours and i am scred terrible that i will catch this from a handjob, sometimes i have light scathing of the penis however no blood is visible nor does it sting when i wash it so it would be hard to call an open cut. there is no other activity besides a handjob from these places.

My questions are this?

Is handjob a NO RISK situation BECAUSE its been studied and researched? Or is is only based off the fact that there is no documented case of a transmission by HJ?

2, My main worry is that what if the masseus touched something in the room that prior had semen on it or something the touched my penis?

3rd Would oil or sorbolene cream mixed with the virus render it unable to infect? also is this based of studies or GUESES?


Your help is invaluable and much appreciated.

Regards




Offline Ann

  • Administrator
  • Member
  • Posts: 28,140
  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: Att Andy,and mods I cannot continue on like this
« Reply #9 on: January 03, 2009, 09:51:56 AM »
Enough,

I've merged your new thread into your original thread - where you should post all your additional thoughts or questions. It helps us to help you when you keep all your additional thoughts or questions in one thread.

If you need help finding your thread when you come here, click on the "Show own posts" link under your name in the left-hand column of any forum page.

Please also read through the Welcome Thread so you can familiarize yourself with our Forum Posting Guidelines. Thank you for your cooperation.


Cut the drama and get a grip. You haven't been at risk through getting handjobs.

Yes, it's been researched and studied. No, there has never, ever been a case of transmission via handjob.

And YES, please seek professional mental health care. We cannot help you with that here.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline Enoughs Enough

  • Member
  • Posts: 7
Re: Att Andy,and mods I cannot continue on like this
« Reply #10 on: January 06, 2009, 10:37:57 AM »
Enough,

I've merged your new thread into your original thread - where you should post all your additional thoughts or questions. It helps us to help you when you keep all your additional thoughts or questions in one thread.

If you need help finding your thread when you come here, click on the "Show own posts" link under your name in the left-hand column of any forum page.

Please also read through the Welcome Thread so you can familiarize yourself with our Forum Posting Guidelines. Thank you for your cooperation.


Cut the drama and get a grip. You haven't been at risk through getting handjobs.

Yes, it's been researched and studied. No, there has never, ever been a case of transmission via handjob.

And YES, please seek professional mental health care. We cannot help you with that here.

Ann


Thank you for getting to the point so quickly Ann,

I just wanted to be sure even with a little scathing that it is still no risk AT ALL???

Regards

Offline Ann

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  • Member
  • Posts: 28,140
  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: Att Andy,and mods I cannot continue on like this
« Reply #11 on: January 06, 2009, 11:58:32 AM »
Enough,

NO RISK AT ALL!

If you've read the Welcome Thread like I've asked you to, you will have read the following posting guideline:

Quote
Anyone who continues to post excessively, questioning a conclusive negative result or no-risk situation, will be subject to a four week Time Out (a temporary ban from the Forums). If you continue to post excessively after one Time Out, you may be given a second Time Out which will last eight weeks. There is no third Time Out - it is a permanent ban. The purpose of a Time Out is to encourage you to seek the face-to-face help we cannot provide on this forum.

Please consider yourself warned.

Use condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, correctly and consistently, and you will avoid hiv infection. It really is that simple.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline Enoughs Enough

  • Member
  • Posts: 7
Re: Att Andy,and mods I cannot continue on like this
« Reply #12 on: January 06, 2009, 12:01:52 PM »
Enough,

NO RISK AT ALL!

If you've read the Welcome Thread like I've asked you to, you will have read the following posting guideline:

Please consider yourself warned.

Use condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, correctly and consistently, and you will avoid hiv infection. It really is that simple.

Ann


Thanks Ann,

Much appreciated, im sorry to be a pest I realise that you can only say NORISK so many times.

Thank you very much
Nathan

 


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