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Author Topic: provide oral sex while gum bleeding  (Read 2805 times)

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Offline lee2008

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  • Posts: 5
provide oral sex while gum bleeding
« on: November 12, 2008, 09:30:48 PM »
 :'( Hi, all ,can sb here help me? i am very anxious.

Last week i provided blowjob to a man and i even swallowed his precum. i knowed oral sex is safer than anal, but what made things worse is that i found i had gum bleeding after i finished.
Last night he told me his boyfriend died of AIDS 8 years ago but he is safe. i am very anxious, i dont know why he told me this. He even said he lived with his boyfriend for 9 years after his friend was known infected.

Can sb told me what i can do now?

Offline Ann

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  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: provide oral sex while gum bleeding
« Reply #1 on: November 13, 2008, 06:38:05 AM »

Just because someone lived with a person who was hiv positive, doesn't mean they are too. Condoms provide excellent protection against hiv infection and there are many couples in the world where on is poz and one is neg.

Giving blowjobs is a theoretical risk - not an actual one. There are over a dozen different proteins and enzymes in saliva that damage hiv and render it unable to infect. Also, there have been three studies of couples where one is positive and one is negative. In the couples who used condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, but no barrier for oral activities, not one of the negative partners became infected with hiv. Not one.

You need to be using condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, every time, no exceptions until such time as you are in a securely monogamous relationship where you have both tested for ALL sexually transmitted infections together. To agree to have unprotected intercourse is to consent to the possibility of being infected with an STI. Sex with a condom lasts only a matter of minutes, but hiv is forever.

Have a look through all three condom and lube links in my signature line so you can use condoms with confidence.

Anyone who is sexually active should be having a full sexual health care check-up, including but not limited to hiv testing, at least once a year and more often if unprotected intercourse occurs.

If you aren't already having regular, routine check-ups, now is the time to start. As long as you make sure condoms are being used for intercourse, you can fully expect your routine hiv tests to return with negative results. Don't forget to always get checked for all the other sexually transmitted infections as well, because they are MUCH easier to transmit than hiv.

Use condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, correctly and consistently, and you will avoid hiv infection. It really is that simple.

Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline lee2008

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Re: provide oral sex while gum bleeding
« Reply #2 on: November 13, 2008, 08:31:58 AM »
Hi, Ann, thank you very much for your reply. i know living with hiv positive is safe,but i forgot to tell you he even had anal sex with his infected bf without condom. He said he is top ,so he is safe. This is the reason that makes me so worried now! :'(

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: provide oral sex while gum bleeding
« Reply #3 on: November 13, 2008, 09:44:53 AM »
Yes, well even if the guy you sucked is HIV+, the risk was more theoretical than actual. There's no need to repeat the very full account Ann has given you about this issue.

Right now you are listening to fears and not facts. And the real world of HIV facts are that the risk is way more theoretical than real. 

I don't see any need for testing unless you are going to get so caught up in worrying that you need the inevitable negative result to put the issue to rest.

Andy Velez

Offline lee2008

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Re: provide oral sex while gum bleeding
« Reply #4 on: November 13, 2008, 09:57:24 AM »
hi, Andy. Thank you very much. i am just wondering whether my gum bleeding makes entrance for the virus. Otherwise i wont worry about infection.

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: provide oral sex while gum bleeding
« Reply #5 on: November 13, 2008, 10:24:08 AM »
Theoretically, yes. BUT, remember your saliva has over a dozen enzymes and proteins which are VERY effective at preventing transmission of viable HIV.

Given what a common activity giving oral is, we would have known long before today if it was a serious risk for transmission.
Andy Velez

Offline lee2008

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Re: provide oral sex while gum bleeding
« Reply #6 on: November 13, 2008, 10:32:25 AM »
Thank you , Andy. i know the best way is to get tested. i am so silly. you know what? i am a volunteer to help people who fear being infected by AIDS in some websites of China. i helped so many people but i just cannot help myself this time.

Thank u once again.

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: provide oral sex while gum bleeding
« Reply #7 on: November 13, 2008, 11:08:37 AM »
You're welcome. And you're human. We're prey to feelings and fears, even when experience, common sense and facts tell us otherwise.

Andy Velez

Offline lee2008

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Re: provide oral sex while gum bleeding
« Reply #8 on: May 16, 2009, 09:20:23 PM »
hi again,i wonder what is the risk of being inserted by a finger with saliva?  :'(

Offline anniebc

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  • AM member since 2003
Re: provide oral sex while gum bleeding
« Reply #9 on: May 17, 2009, 01:53:57 AM »
No..there is NO RISK, if you haven't done so already then please read the lessons here on how HIV is and is not transmitted.

Never knock on deaths door..ring the bell and run..he really hates that.


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