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Author Topic: For all the New poz people  (Read 6454 times)

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Offline NLEWLAD

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  • Anything is possible, ANYTHING
For all the New poz people
« on: October 19, 2008, 05:32:25 PM »
its been nearly 12 months now since i tested poz

the first few months were an emotional rollercoaster ride

i know exactly, as most people on this site what your going through,  the first few months of that "ime sorry to tell you you have tested positive for HIV" statement  is the worst part.


believe me,  time is a healer, 

things i have done since becoming poz

1  changed my diet,  dropped all processed/fatty high carb foods

2  lost 3.5 stone in weight (was needed)   now a healthy 12.5 stone

3  Joined a Gym  and got some horny muscles

4  found lots of new friends 

5  got a great new life


hiv to me was a wake up call, my previous life  was nights out on the booze, drug fueled  and a total disrespect for my body  (including bare back sex)

i now have never felt better


dont let your hiv diagnosis get you down !


grab it by its bollox and take control of your life


love to you all

simon

x
Simon - Location Manchester England
Negative test 10/11/07
Tested poz 28/12/07
Confirmed WB 07/01/08
Sero-converted Late December 07

Date        CD4            %              VL

7/01/08   1273 :)      N/A       100,232
24/01/08   755 :(      42%         4,010
13/2/08     922 :)      45%       78,234
09/04/08   652 :(      38%       36,604
05/05/08   936 :)      39%       38,952
07/07/08   844 :)      34%       24,000
12/11/08   753 :(      31%       45,600
no meds yet:)

Offline Peter Staley

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  • Founder & Advisory Editor, AIDSmeds.com
    • AIDSmeds.com
Re: For all the New poz people
« Reply #1 on: October 20, 2008, 12:38:16 PM »
Thanks for the update, Simon.  Great post!  LOVE the new you!

Offline madbrain

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Re: For all the New poz people
« Reply #2 on: October 20, 2008, 06:22:51 PM »
its been nearly 12 months now since i tested poz

the first few months were an emotional rollercoaster ride

i know exactly, as most people on this site what your going through,  the first few months of that "ime sorry to tell you you have tested positive for HIV" statement  is the worst part.


believe me,  time is a healer, 

I agree with you, the first few months are the worst. I would go as far as saying the first year was the worst for me.

Like you I have worked on my diet , and been working out in the gym too. I made some new friends as well (a few poz ones), and I have been on a pretty extensive supplement program.

The 2nd anniversary of my HIV+ test is coming up on nov 1st, and I have just gotten my highest ever CD4 result in my labs last week. And still no meds on the horizon.

Offline NLEWLAD

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  • Anything is possible, ANYTHING
Re: For all the New poz people
« Reply #3 on: October 21, 2008, 03:38:50 PM »
 Re: For all the New poz people
« Reply #1 on: Yesterday at 12:38:16 pm »   

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Thanks for the update, Simon.  Great post!  LOVE the new you!


-------------------------------------------

Wow,  i feel totally honored  Peter replying to one of my threads


Peter your website has been one of the main things that helped me come to terms with HIV

i totally thank you

Simon
Simon - Location Manchester England
Negative test 10/11/07
Tested poz 28/12/07
Confirmed WB 07/01/08
Sero-converted Late December 07

Date        CD4            %              VL

7/01/08   1273 :)      N/A       100,232
24/01/08   755 :(      42%         4,010
13/2/08     922 :)      45%       78,234
09/04/08   652 :(      38%       36,604
05/05/08   936 :)      39%       38,952
07/07/08   844 :)      34%       24,000
12/11/08   753 :(      31%       45,600
no meds yet:)

Offline Peter Staley

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  • Founder & Advisory Editor, AIDSmeds.com
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Re: For all the New poz people
« Reply #4 on: October 22, 2008, 07:52:45 AM »
Peter your website has been one of the main things that helped me come to terms with HIV

i totally thank you

Simon

THANKS!  That's really nice to hear.

Peter

Offline jsonny

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  • Posts: 1
Re: For all the New poz people
« Reply #5 on: October 22, 2008, 05:39:02 PM »
Fantastic attitude which really makes a difference. I had a mental breakdown when food was left outside my hospital room.  I had a fantastic social worker who explained to me about ignorant people and now when I meet an ignorant person I threaten to sneeze on them. It really scares them but my point is that a healthy mind will create a healthy body and when you respect your body, it makes everyone else jealous but it shows YOU are doing the right thing. I was diagnosed in 89 I think and my counts are great. It took a while to accept the facts BUT I went to group counseling and talked to others who had a lot to share.  Life is not that bad when you are not alone. I have buried two partners and why I survive is beyond me BUT there must be a reason. CONGRATULATIONS you are something to be proud of.......................

Offline ARMANDO

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Re: For all the New poz people
« Reply #6 on: October 23, 2008, 07:00:39 AM »
i know how ignorant people can be,when i was first diagnoised about 18 yrs ago ,the company that i worked for at the time had a meeting of about 25 people with whom i worked with on a daily basis.They each were asked if they had a problem working with me and i had to sit there and watch this all unfold as each one of them stated they they did have a problem!!!i couldn't believe that this was happening to me but he did!!!After the meeting ,still in shock,my boss called me into his office and and asked me if i would consider quitting,at the time i would have walked away with about 45,000 and no insurance!!!tis is a company that employs about 7500 people and i was the first hiv + case they had ever experienced.

Offline NLEWLAD

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  • Anything is possible, ANYTHING
Re: For all the New poz people
« Reply #7 on: October 28, 2008, 09:45:30 PM »
Fantastic attitude which really makes a difference. I had a mental breakdown when food was left outside my hospital room.  I had a fantastic social worker who explained to me about ignorant people and now when I meet an ignorant person I threaten to sneeze on them. It really scares them but my point is that a healthy mind will create a healthy body and when you respect your body, it makes everyone else jealous but it shows YOU are doing the right thing. I was diagnosed in 89 I think and my counts are great. It took a while to accept the facts BUT I went to group counseling and talked to others who had a lot to share.  Life is not that bad when you are not alone. I have buried two partners and why I survive is beyond me BUT there must be a reason. CONGRATULATIONS you are something to be proud of.......................


i hope your partners who you burried are now (i know they are) at peace  and thank you

xxxxxx
Simon - Location Manchester England
Negative test 10/11/07
Tested poz 28/12/07
Confirmed WB 07/01/08
Sero-converted Late December 07

Date        CD4            %              VL

7/01/08   1273 :)      N/A       100,232
24/01/08   755 :(      42%         4,010
13/2/08     922 :)      45%       78,234
09/04/08   652 :(      38%       36,604
05/05/08   936 :)      39%       38,952
07/07/08   844 :)      34%       24,000
12/11/08   753 :(      31%       45,600
no meds yet:)

Offline NLEWLAD

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  • Posts: 230
  • Anything is possible, ANYTHING
Re: For all the New poz people
« Reply #8 on: October 28, 2008, 09:51:30 PM »
i know how ignorant people can be,when i was first diagnoised about 18 yrs ago ,the company that i worked for at the time had a meeting of about 25 people with whom i worked with on a daily basis.They each were asked if they had a problem working with me and i had to sit there and watch this all unfold as each one of them stated they they did have a problem!!!i couldn't believe that this was happening to me but he did!!!After the meeting ,still in shock,my boss called me into his office and and asked me if i would consider quitting,at the time i would have walked away with about 45,000 and no insurance!!!tis is a company that employs about 7500 people and i was the first hiv + case they had ever experienced.

what did you do?

i say ignore them them --- not sure what your countries laws are --  in the uk we have a law (disibilaty discrimination act)  that protects hiv positive people and what happened to you is illegal in the uk (to be asked to leave because of your hiv status)

if your country does not have such a law  its totally shamefull

x
Simon - Location Manchester England
Negative test 10/11/07
Tested poz 28/12/07
Confirmed WB 07/01/08
Sero-converted Late December 07

Date        CD4            %              VL

7/01/08   1273 :)      N/A       100,232
24/01/08   755 :(      42%         4,010
13/2/08     922 :)      45%       78,234
09/04/08   652 :(      38%       36,604
05/05/08   936 :)      39%       38,952
07/07/08   844 :)      34%       24,000
12/11/08   753 :(      31%       45,600
no meds yet:)

Offline Sweet_C

  • Member
  • Posts: 171
Re: For all the New poz people
« Reply #9 on: November 08, 2008, 10:08:29 AM »
What a great post!!!  It's been a little more than two months for me, and the thing I'm most surprised at is how normal my life is.  When I first got the diagnosis, I thought everything would change dramatically. 

One change though, is that I don't take anything for granted.  I am much more thankful for the good things in  my life.
Tested positive on September 11, 2008

Offline Movingon

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  • Posts: 52
Re: For all the New poz people
« Reply #10 on: November 11, 2008, 02:15:02 AM »
i would just like to echo what simon said. Its been 15 months since i tested positive and almost 12 months since i started meds. The first 6 months were shit, awful, and i wanted to go to sleep and NOT wake up in the mornings.

Then i slowly started to get bored of crying. I realised that i was still healthy. Then , after i took my very first dose of meds, i realised that i wasn't going to turn in to a green money and curl up and die. I felt healthy again. All those years of being infected and not knowing about it, all the colds, all the fevers and night sweats, they are all gone. Now i feel fit and strong again

i also see hiv as a wake up call. I spent 10 years partying my ass off in asia, getting off my face on drugs and booze, and having more than my fair share of unprotected sex. Itd all stopped. I drink moderately, haven't touched a class A drug for well over a year, and just have the occasional smoke.

I was a fat and unhealthy 250 pound monster before. Now i am a toned, fit , healthy 215 pounds, and my family (who know about my status) say i look the best they have ever seen me

time DOES heal , just need to be patient

Peter - this site is a true life saver, so thanks to you and all the great people who work for you

Offline auspoz

  • Member
  • Posts: 158
Re: For all the New poz people
« Reply #11 on: November 11, 2008, 07:23:42 AM »
I just wanted to say congratulations to all who have travelled so far, and written about their journeys in this thread. It's great to hear from people who really know how tough it is to fight back after the HIV punch to the guts.

I know I will do some looking back when the 12 month mark comes around in Jan, but it was a year ago that I started feeling unwell, leading up to all sorts of tests "just to be sure". That didn't quite go to plan. I hear you Movingon about the first 6 months. It's a private kind of strength that you draw from seeing yourself go from that initial dark dark place to dancing and singing the night away with new, honest and truly caring friends. This weekend I lost my voice from singing and laughing too hard. And for so long I cried myself hoarse. I will NOT be going back there EVER. If I could ever often newly diagnosed people one thing, it would be to BELIEVE them when they say it gets better. I guess I didn't listen, and reacted realllly badly.

And although I haven't lost 3 stone yet (good for you Simon! :)), I hope to soon. First time in my life I joined a gym, work out every day, and have inspired others (non-poz) to join also. I got a trainer (so long as I can afford it!) and it's the best investment I ever made. I have repositioned everything in my life so that I now MATTER- I wonder if I realised that before. Friendships that stifled me for their own benefits and sanctions I constructed out of fear are gone. I want to be better than before, not the same or worse. So I eat brilliantly, exercise a lot, indulge where I was once so so restrained and am learning to love myself I guess.

And now I know about HIV. I really didn't before though I thought I did. Fear is a powerful emotion. No more fear I say. It isn't fair, no, never will be. But I'm grateful that I found out in 2008, and for those who fought so that I might be able to say that. Prejudice rarely survives experience.

So things are looking up. Yep, it's taken a year (ish) out of my life to regroup, refocus and resume, but I feel pretty damned sure I will be stronger in the end. Damn it- I matter, maybe even more than before. Whatever messed up shit went on at the beginning of my life, I sure as hell am not going to let the next bits be written for me.

Thanks everyone for your support and Peter for this invaluable life. I mean it when I say I doubt I'd be here without you.

I'm back to where I was. And I'm not stopping there.

Auspoz.
« Last Edit: November 11, 2008, 07:30:32 AM by auspoz »

Offline NLEWLAD

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  • Posts: 230
  • Anything is possible, ANYTHING
Re: For all the New poz people
« Reply #12 on: December 04, 2008, 09:52:40 PM »
just wanted to bump this thread up  as  looking back and especially as peter stanley has aproved this thread

i am very proud of it  and i do believe it will go somewhere to help the newly diagnosed people 


and i am still feeling amazing  xxxxxxx
Simon - Location Manchester England
Negative test 10/11/07
Tested poz 28/12/07
Confirmed WB 07/01/08
Sero-converted Late December 07

Date        CD4            %              VL

7/01/08   1273 :)      N/A       100,232
24/01/08   755 :(      42%         4,010
13/2/08     922 :)      45%       78,234
09/04/08   652 :(      38%       36,604
05/05/08   936 :)      39%       38,952
07/07/08   844 :)      34%       24,000
12/11/08   753 :(      31%       45,600
no meds yet:)

Offline jayjax

  • Member
  • Posts: 83
Re: For all the New poz people
« Reply #13 on: December 05, 2008, 07:15:41 PM »
NLEWLAD,

You are absolutely right!  After being newly diagnosed and starting meds, this site has been instrumental in learning about HIV and being positive. Everyone has been so helpful.



jayjax,
08 Oct 08:  Diagnosed
18 Oct 08:  1st Lab Work: CD4 - 268, VL 7,000
18 Nov 08:  Started Atripla
28 Jan 09:   CD4 - 195, VL 70
05 May 09:  CD4 - 201, VL = Undetectable
16 Aug 09: CD4 - 235, VL = Undetectable
30 Nov 09 CD4 - 300, VL = Undetectable
30 Mar 10 CD4 - 305, VL = Undetectable
27 Jul 10 CD4 -  301, VL = 100
13 Aug 10 -- Switched to Truvada/Reyataz/Norvir
30 Sep 10 --  CD4 598, VL = Undetectable

Offline NLEWLAD

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  • Anything is possible, ANYTHING
Re: For all the New poz people
« Reply #14 on: December 10, 2008, 09:37:22 PM »
HEY  JAYJAX

i know i am right,  i dont want that to sound big headed  because i am totally not,  i went through shit when i found out i was poz  got banned off uk websites had to start anti depressants (off them now)

but what you have is what i have an amazing website www.aidsmeds.com  all the information (factual) and (experiences) that you will ever need

without this site i dont know where i would be

again peter  i wish i was the uk queen  to  knight you   xx  (peter stanley)
Simon - Location Manchester England
Negative test 10/11/07
Tested poz 28/12/07
Confirmed WB 07/01/08
Sero-converted Late December 07

Date        CD4            %              VL

7/01/08   1273 :)      N/A       100,232
24/01/08   755 :(      42%         4,010
13/2/08     922 :)      45%       78,234
09/04/08   652 :(      38%       36,604
05/05/08   936 :)      39%       38,952
07/07/08   844 :)      34%       24,000
12/11/08   753 :(      31%       45,600
no meds yet:)

Offline NLEWLAD

  • Member
  • Posts: 230
  • Anything is possible, ANYTHING
Re: For all the New poz people
« Reply #15 on: December 19, 2008, 11:50:07 PM »
i am wondering why poz people can not make threads to help the untested

had a genuine none offensive thread created in the am i infected section   

but it got deleted 


???confused????
Simon - Location Manchester England
Negative test 10/11/07
Tested poz 28/12/07
Confirmed WB 07/01/08
Sero-converted Late December 07

Date        CD4            %              VL

7/01/08   1273 :)      N/A       100,232
24/01/08   755 :(      42%         4,010
13/2/08     922 :)      45%       78,234
09/04/08   652 :(      38%       36,604
05/05/08   936 :)      39%       38,952
07/07/08   844 :)      34%       24,000
12/11/08   753 :(      31%       45,600
no meds yet:)

Offline Peter Staley

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  • Founder & Advisory Editor, AIDSmeds.com
    • AIDSmeds.com
Re: For all the New poz people
« Reply #16 on: December 20, 2008, 10:20:20 PM »
NLEWLAD -- please read the posting guidelines in the Am I Infected? forum here:

http://forums.poz.com/index.php?topic=220.msg1857#msg1857

Specifically, bullet #4.

That forum is treated very differently than the rest of our forums, and has been for years.

Offline megasept

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  • Steven here...
Re: For all the New poz people
« Reply #17 on: December 25, 2008, 03:22:34 AM »
...in the uk we have a law (disibilaty discrimination act)  that protects hiv positive people and what happened to you is illegal in the uk (to be asked to leave because of your hiv status)

if your country does not have such a law  its totally shamefull
x

OK, that was a kangaroo court/hanging party thing.

We do have a similar US law for some time now. Employee protections from arbitrary/unfair termination vary state to state (zero to some, but weak at best), but additionally there are federal laws applicable in all 50 states that protect poz under disability, ADA ("reasonable accommodation"-not termination- in the workplace). Also HIPA (health privacy, etc) provides further protection.

 8)  -megasept




Offline 22 years

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Re: For all the New poz people
« Reply #18 on: January 12, 2009, 09:43:22 AM »
Just wanted to add my 2cents worth to this forum.

When I found out 22 years ago that I was HIV+ and AIDS it was a major head trip as everyone goes through.  At that time all of my friends were dying.

You will go through the grieving stages.  All of them including anger.  Allow youself to go through this process, it is important it alows you to move forward.  Learn everything you can about the virus and keep on top of drugs.  We do not know what the long term effects will be.  We do not know how long we can live.

Love is all there is, love yourself.

Rick
Human relationships exist to produce love. When we pollute our relationships with unloving thoughts, or destroy or abort them with unloving attitudes, we are threatening our emotional survival. —Excerpted from A Return to Love: Reflections on the Principles of A Course in Miracles

 


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