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Author Topic: Can I move on now?  (Read 2150 times)

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Offline HMaN

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  • Posts: 6
Can I move on now?
« on: October 10, 2008, 01:12:51 PM »
Hello everyone. Please bear with my long post. Any and all advice would be greatly appreciated. A 2 part question:

I am a bisexual 25 yr old man. During early to mid June, I had unprotected sex with another man. I received unprotected oral and performed unprotected insertive anal sex. The insertive anal sex lasted about 2 minutes or so, until I realized what a mistake this could be and put a condom on. I recently got tested 2 days ago (Uni Gold 10 minute rapid test) and the results came back negative. The health worker asked me many personal questions and told me that I am definitely negative, and the results are conclusive.

1. Am I 100% HIV negative? Can I move on now with my life and put this behind me?

Part 2 Question: (Which I feel real silly discussing but is important for my sanity) From the time of the unprotected encounter to the time of testing I have been a total mess. The anxiety was killing me along with some slight depression. I came to these forums and observed the experiences of other members. Based on those experiences, I would apply it to my own and try to estimate whether or not my chances were good/bad for testing poz.

More importantly, I noticed that some members here have their lab results/stats on their post signature. There are some that say things such as "Tested Negative 3/06" followed by "Tested Poz 6/06". And these got me all worried again.

2. Is it possible I have not seroconverted? Should I get tested again in a few months? Or am I just worrying myself a little too much?

I dont know what is wrong in my head. I was relieved when my results came back negative, but now,  its almost like my brain is convincing me that there is still a chance I am poz. I just cant get any closure on this. Please help me.


Offline RapidRod

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  • Posts: 15,193
Re: Can I move on now?
« Reply #1 on: October 10, 2008, 02:18:57 PM »
You are conclusively negative. If you want to keep that status use condoms consistently and correctly always for anal sex and vaginal sex.

Offline Ann

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  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: Can I move on now?
« Reply #2 on: October 10, 2008, 02:23:13 PM »
H,

Yes, you are conclusively hiv negative. The window period is three months and you tested outside that time frame.

When you see someone stating they tested negative at such and such a point then positive after, what they're not mentioning is they had a risk in-between the negative and positive results. They list their last negative result to show that they're not only newly diagnosed, but newly infected as well - not to show they're late converters. They're not.

You need to wise up and start using condoms or you're going to wind up posting here with similar results in your own signature line. You got away with it this time, next time you might not be so lucky. As Andy Velez would say, you're putting your life at risk by not using condoms. It's as stark and simple as that.

You need to be using condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, every time, no exceptions until such time as you are in a securely monogamous relationship where you have both tested for ALL sexually transmitted infections together. To agree to have unprotected intercourse is to consent to the possibility of being infected with an STI. Sex with a condom lasts only a matter of minutes, but hiv is forever.

Have a look through all three condom and lube links in my signature line so you can use condoms with confidence.

Although you do not need further testing at this time, anyone who is sexually active should be having a full sexual health care check-up, including but not limited to hiv testing, at least once a year and more often if unprotected intercourse occurs.

If you aren't already having regular, routine check-ups, now is the time to start. As long as you make sure condoms are being used for intercourse, you can fully expect your routine hiv tests to return with negative results. Don't forget to always get checked for all the other sexually transmitted infections as well, because they are MUCH easier to transmit than hiv.

Use condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, correctly and consistently, and you will avoid hiv infection. It really is that simple.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline HMaN

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  • Posts: 6
Re: Can I move on now?
« Reply #3 on: October 10, 2008, 05:36:55 PM »
Thank you both for your input. It definitely puts my mind at ease! I believe I can finally learn from my mistake and put this difficult time behind me. You have no idea how much your replies helped!

Keep up the good work with the forums. Rest assured that you are helping those, like me, who have little or no knowledge about this disease and its characteristics. You are making a difference in people's lives, even if its just giving your advice and expert opinion regarding people's inquires. Thank again, and best wishes.  :)

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: Can I move on now?
« Reply #4 on: October 10, 2008, 09:05:27 PM »
And most important of all, learn from this experience. You can have as much intercourse as you like and with as many partners, regardless of their HIV status. But need always to do it the safer way. That means anytime you have intercourse whether it's anal or vaginal, the insertive partner is always wearing a condom. NO EXCEPTIONS! Follow that principle and you won't have to worry about HIV via sex.

Good luck to you. 
Andy Velez

Offline HMaN

  • Member
  • Posts: 6
Broken condom with a little blood
« Reply #5 on: January 25, 2009, 04:15:29 PM »
Hello everyone, I have posted on these forums once before and have learned my lesson to always wear condoms. However, I recently had an encounter where your expertise is needed.

I had protected intercourse with another man (I was the top). I noticed that the condom broke, and I pulled out to find a few spots of blood on my penis. I would say I was having sex with the broken condom for about 10 seconds or so, if that. I cleaned it off, put on another condom, and continued on. The condom did not break this time, but I stopped because I kept noticing a little blood again on the condom. He then gave me a blow job and I ejaculated in his mouth.

The details you may need: I have no cuts, sores or lesions on my penis. I am also circumsized. My sex partner also told me that I should'nt worry since he was tested four weeks ago and hasnt had sex in a while. (I believe him, since he is a trustworthy guy and he WAS very tight) I went home after the encounter and washed my area with soap and water.

Should I be worried/get tested?

Another question I have, a social worker specializing in HIV/AIDS told me that the insertive partner has a low risk of infection. He told me that the virus enters the bloodstream through cuts or sores on the penis. I asked him if it enters via the urethra and he told me that it is not likely. What is your opinion on this?

Thank you all...

Offline RapidRod

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  • Posts: 15,193
Re: Broken condom with a little blood
« Reply #6 on: January 25, 2009, 04:57:16 PM »
Your questions will not be answered until you return to your orginal thread. Please make sure you read the posting guidelines that are located in the "Welcome" thread.

Offline HMaN

  • Member
  • Posts: 6
Re: Broken condom with a little blood
« Reply #7 on: January 25, 2009, 04:59:36 PM »
Sorry about that rod, my mistake. I am going to copy and paste my question to my previous thread.

Offline HMaN

  • Member
  • Posts: 6
Re: Can I move on now?
« Reply #8 on: January 25, 2009, 05:00:05 PM »
Hello everyone, I have posted on these forums once before and have learned my lesson to always wear condoms. However, I recently had an encounter where your expertise is needed.

I had protected intercourse with another man (I was the top). I noticed that the condom broke, and I pulled out to find a few spots of blood on my penis. I would say I was having sex with the broken condom for about 10 seconds or so, if that. I cleaned it off, put on another condom, and continued on. The condom did not break this time, but I stopped because I kept noticing a little blood again on the condom. He then gave me a blow job and I ejaculated in his mouth.

The details you may need: I have no cuts, sores or lesions on my penis. I am also circumsized. My sex partner also told me that I should'nt worry since he was tested four weeks ago and hasnt had sex in a while. (I believe him, since he is a trustworthy guy and he WAS very tight) I went home after the encounter and washed my area with soap and water.

Should I be worried/get tested?

Another question I have, a social worker specializing in HIV/AIDS told me that the insertive partner has a low risk of infection. He told me that the virus enters the bloodstream through cuts or sores on the penis. I asked him if it enters via the urethra and he told me that it is not likely. What is your opinion on this?

Thank you all...

Offline RapidRod

  • Member
  • Posts: 15,193
Re: Can I move on now?
« Reply #9 on: January 25, 2009, 05:20:16 PM »
Find a new HIV specialist if they told you HIV is unlikely to be transmitted via the urethra. That is the path of transmission on males along with the anus interior. Yes the risk is lower for the insertive partner but it's not a NO risk. Yes testing is recommended and you already know the timeline on testing.

Offline Andy Velez

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  • Member
  • Posts: 23,860
Re: Can I move on now?
« Reply #10 on: January 25, 2009, 07:05:56 PM »
I've merged your threads. Please keep all comments and questions in this same thread. Thanks.

As for this latest incident, the condom protected you until it broke. Your risk was at the way lower end of the risk scale during this single incident. The cautious thing to do is to get tested at 13 weeks, as Rod suggested. My expectation is that you will test negative.

Good luck to you and keep us posted.

Cheers.
Andy Velez

Offline HMaN

  • Member
  • Posts: 6
Re: Can I move on now?
« Reply #11 on: January 25, 2009, 07:18:10 PM »
Thank you both for your replies. I am optimistic about this current situation, but will test anyway at 13 weeks. I am NOT going to worry myself sick about this, like my original situation. I protected myself by using a condom, so if I do test positive, I can at least say I practiced safe sex and it was out of my control. I did everything I could.

Thank you again, and keep up the great work with the site.


Offline Ann

  • Administrator
  • Member
  • Posts: 27,947
  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: Can I move on now?
« Reply #12 on: January 26, 2009, 06:39:55 AM »
HM,

Please re-read the condom and lube links in my signature line. A correctly used condom rarely breaks.

Like Andy, I also expect you to come out of this ok, but you do need to test to make sure.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

 


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