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Author Topic: IM SCARED AND IM IM BREAKING DOWN  (Read 5603 times)

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Offline aznscared

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IM SCARED AND IM IM BREAKING DOWN
« on: October 01, 2008, 08:21:07 AM »
http://forums.poz.com/index.php?action=activate;u=11753;code=9745c6e185

A month ago i had 4 different encounters with 4 guys within a week.  I met them online. I am heterosexual male, but I got crazy and all of the sudden i wanted to try things out ( i am 20 years old) .   all 4 of them performed an oral sex on me, 2 protected anal sex and I performed an oral sex once. these was my only sexual encounters in years before i got tested for hiv (work-related) which is neg.

Here are my exposures:
1.  4 unprotected insertive oral sex
2.  1  unprotected receptive oral sex
3.   1 protected insertive anal sex
4.   1 protected receptive anal sex
( all these happened only with 4 guys)

Another question is that is it true that getting a tetanus shot prior to your exposure makes you more susceptible for contracting HIV??
Ive been doomed for the past few weeks. I cannot eat, I lost appetite, I even lost my sense of taste, my hands and feet are cold and I am so scared of dying. I think about HIV constantly. My coworkers told me I look tired and I look different now. and btw doc when I was under that extreme stress I lost 4 lbs but now i gained it back again but I still have the coldness on my feet and hands whenever I think of hiv. I feel disoriented everytime I think of it.

this is the 4th week from my exposures and this is the symptom that I may associate with ARS. I had swollen lymph nodes submentally and a few days i had a mild sorethroat. I just had my braces on 2 weeks ago and before I had 2 protruding wires in my inner cheeks which scratch my inner cheeks but I dont know if that causes my lymph nodes.Does getting the ARS symptoms should always include high-grade fever and all the other symptoms or is it possible to just develop few of the symptoms? is a mild fever (99F) for less t han a day a symptom too?

I had been tested for syphilis and gonorrhea and came back neg. I am now scared of gettng a test for HIV. Please tell me if I am in big trouble? this anxiety will break me apart.
have u ever had hiv positive patients that contracted the infection this way?thx

Offline Ann

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Re: IM SCARED AND IM IM BREAKING DOWN
« Reply #1 on: October 01, 2008, 08:31:23 AM »
az,

You were told repeatedly on the MedHelp forum that you are worrying needlessly. Our assessment isn't going to be any different. You did the right thing and used a condom for intercourse. You had no risk.

You need to be using condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, every time, no exceptions until such time as you are in a securely monogamous relationship where you have both tested for ALL sexually transmitted infections together. To agree to have unprotected intercourse is to consent to the possibility of being infected with an STI. Sex with a condom lasts only a matter of minutes, but hiv is forever.

Have a look through all three condom and lube links in my signature line so you can use condoms with confidence.

ALTHOUGH YOU DO NOT NEED TO TEST OVER THESE SPECIFIC INCIDENTS, anyone who is sexually active should be having a full sexual health care check-up, including but not limited to hiv testing, at least once a year and more often if unprotected intercourse occurs.

If you aren't already having regular, routine check-ups, now is the time to start. As long as you make sure condoms are being used for intercourse, you can fully expect your routine hiv tests to return with negative results. Don't forget to always get checked for all the other sexually transmitted infections as well, because they are MUCH easier to transmit than hiv.

Use condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, correctly and consistently, and you will avoid hiv infection. It really is that simple.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

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"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: IM SCARED AND IM IM BREAKING DOWN
« Reply #2 on: October 01, 2008, 08:31:51 AM »
No, you are NOT in big trouble. So take a nice deep breath in right now and let it out slowly. And another. And do that whenever you find yourself tensing up. It really helps in all kinds of situations.

Now, as to the specifics of your recent incidents. Receiving oral is absolutely not in anyway a risk for HIV transmission. Giving oral is a risk only in theory. Incidents where people claim to have become infected in that manner never seem to hold up under scrutiny and other factors seem involved. Your saliva has over a dozen elements which are very effective in weakening the transmission of viable HIV. Of course, if you have bad oral care or a fresh wound in your mouth say from dental work, it would be unwise to give oral, particularly with ejaculation. You will have to decide what's in your own comfort zone about this.

Condoms provide very effective protection against HIV transmission. So it's good to read that you used them for both insertive and receptive anal intercourse. Keep on doing that everytime and you will be well protected. No exceptions, no matter what you think you know about a partner's history or how great he looks or any of that. A condom everytime is a must.

Becoming sexually active is very exciting. It also can be anxiety provoking as you explore and find yourself sexually. Take your time and always, without exception use condoms for intercourse, whether with a man or a woman.

Your symptoms are absolutely not HIV specific, but that's no surprise since you didn't do anything risky. If they persist you should discuss them with your doctor. And by the way, for future reference, symptoms will never tell you anything accurately about your HIV status. If there is has been risky business, then an HIV test at 13 weeks after is the only way to get a reliable answer about your status.

This time you're good to go and no testing for HIV is necessary. We do in general advsie that anyone who's sexually active ought to have a full STD panel done regularly -- at least once a year.

Cheers,
Andy Velez

Offline aznscared

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Re: IM SCARED AND IM IM BREAKING DOWN
« Reply #3 on: October 01, 2008, 08:54:21 AM »
Thanks ann and Andy

I am just trying to get another opinion from other sites which helped me calmed down a little bit.
My other question is on ARS. IF ever a person is dealing with ARS symptoms, does he or she should have a fever? mild fever? and how long symptoms occur and does all symptoms occur altogether at the same time?

Offline Ann

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Re: IM SCARED AND IM IM BREAKING DOWN
« Reply #4 on: October 01, 2008, 09:01:54 AM »
az,

Symptoms, or even the LACK of symptoms, will never tell you anything about your hiv status. Some people get so ill during they can't get out bed, while others notice NOTHING at all. For this reason, we don't discuss symptoms here. We give risk assessments and testing advice.

Our assessment is you had NO risk and our testing advice is you don't need to over these encounters.

However, if you EVER had unprotected intercourse, you need to test. A test at three months or more following your last incident of unprotected anal or vaginal intercourse will be conclusive.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline aznscared

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Re: IM SCARED AND IM IM BREAKING DOWN
« Reply #5 on: October 01, 2008, 09:06:17 AM »
Thank you Ann.

I hope I am ok. I dont know if this is an appropriate question, but based on other stories that you came across with, had anyone or atleast anybody tested positive that was in my similar case?  sorry if this is a crappy question to ask. thanks

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: IM SCARED AND IM IM BREAKING DOWN
« Reply #6 on: October 01, 2008, 09:18:33 AM »
You need to re-read what we've said to you. Why would you test positive when we've both told you that you had no risk for HIV transmission? Get it?

You're all caught up in anxiety and feelings aren't facts. The FACT is that you had protected intercourse. That means you were not at risk for transmission. None of the other activities put you at risk. Period.
Andy Velez

Offline aznscared

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Re: IM SCARED AND IM IM BREAKING DOWN
« Reply #7 on: October 01, 2008, 09:27:13 AM »
Thanks Andy.

Ok here's what triggered my anxiety all night ( I work nightshift in a Hospital, that's why I was able to check my temp every 5 mins.) I called up the local hiv clinic and she told me I am at risk and I asked her the same question if they ever had a case that was tested positive and she said yes. And then I told her that I got swollen lymph nodes and she told me "well. that is not good." and the rest of the words that came out of her mouth was "why are you regretting now, you took the risk" and it made me feel so bad I had to throw up and I was shaking. The last word she said; " I have to hang up now, you have to see me in 2 months." I was dreaded. I checked the card that she gave to me when she counseled me and she was an RN,BSN,ACRN. This is giving me confusion.

Offline RapidRod

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Re: IM SCARED AND IM IM BREAKING DOWN
« Reply #8 on: October 01, 2008, 09:32:12 AM »
There is no confusion in the following:

Anyone who continues to post excessively, questioning a conclusive negative result or no-risk situation, will be subject to a four week Time Out (a temporary ban from the Forums). If you continue to post excessively after one Time Out, you may be given a second Time Out which will last eight weeks. There is no third Time Out - it is a permanent ban. The purpose of a Time Out is to encourage you to seek the face-to-face help we cannot provide on this forum.

Offline aznscared

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Re: IM SCARED AND IM IM BREAKING DOWN
« Reply #9 on: October 01, 2008, 09:42:06 AM »
I am not stressing that I am at a very high risk I am just saying why would somebody that works in hiv clinic would say something like that? I am just asking what is with her telling me those scary words with the fact that she know what was my encounters.

PLS dont give me a time-out. I am trying my best to think rationally and I am trying to calm myself I just needed a more reassurance. Thanks again.

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: IM SCARED AND IM IM BREAKING DOWN
« Reply #10 on: October 01, 2008, 01:48:33 PM »
She was incorrect. We're not going to get into an interpretation of WHY someone gave you some inaccurate and misinformed responses. You can listen to and believe whomever you choose to. We've given you the real deal here and we're very, very careful about what we say. They are science-based responses.

If you keep looking elsewhere including on the web, you are for sure going to find responses that will incorrectly fuel your worst fears.

Yours is NOT an HIV situation. Period.
Andy Velez

Offline aznscared

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Re: IM SCARED AND IM IM BREAKING DOWN
« Reply #11 on: October 04, 2008, 03:26:32 PM »
Hello guys I know you are sick and tired of all these "symptom questions" , but I just want to ask if A lump in the throat and when I try to spit out something from my throat it iis a very thick consistency mucous. My highest temp was 99.1 F (when I am under anxiety) but when I try to relax my temp tends to go down all the way to 98.0 F. I still have swollen lymph nodes submentally but other than that I know my procrastination and lack of appetite is due to anxiety ( I get these alot when I am extremely nervous or im in fear).  I also feel this warm sensation on my right neck and ear. I just want to know if this looks like ARS.
 

Another Question, I know a body lotion is an oil based lubricant but if you use it for a short period of time and the condom did not brake, does it change your protection against hiv? (considering the condom DID NOT break or intact.) 

Thanks guys!

Offline RapidRod

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Re: IM SCARED AND IM IM BREAKING DOWN
« Reply #12 on: October 04, 2008, 03:36:49 PM »
Are you looking for a T.O.? Read the posting guidelines in the "Welcome" thread.

Offline aznscared

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Re: IM SCARED AND IM IM BREAKING DOWN
« Reply #13 on: October 04, 2008, 03:46:47 PM »
No, I just want some quick answers if its ok? Am I that persistent? I havent posted in days trying not to bother you but I am just asking general questions .
I just want to know if those symptoms COULD BE related to ARS and if using a body lotion which is an oil based lubricant automatically change the effectiveness of the condom?(considering the  condom did not break)

I dont want trouble. I just want to learn.

Offline anniebc

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Re: IM SCARED AND IM IM BREAKING DOWN
« Reply #14 on: October 04, 2008, 04:38:43 PM »
Youa re HIV negative.

Read the posts again..especially post #8.

Please consider yourself warned..one more post and you wil be given a 28 day TO

Jan
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
Never knock on deaths door..ring the bell and run..he really hates that.

Offline aznscared

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Re: IM SCARED AND IM IM BREAKING DOWN
« Reply #15 on: October 07, 2008, 04:26:18 PM »
Thank you Ann,Andy, Rod and Jan for assessing my risks. I hope you understand what we (anxious people) are going through. I am trying my best to forget it. 
I asked the 2 people I had engaged protective anal sex. The other one told me we used condom so i dont have to worry about it and there was no ejaculation and he was tested a month ago. The other guy just messaged me again cause I keep on bugging him and I keep on asking him if we really used the condom properly. He said "how many times do i have to tell you to relax geez, if you ask me again im not even going to answer your question and let you fester" yes indeed we used condom but I am just trying to think any possible way that the condom slipped off or he took it off or something. Do you think he took it off? considering that he was the one who brought the condoms and he also brought a water-based lubricant? 

Regarding ARS, I know there is no way you could tell your hiv status with the symptoms or no symptoms at all. My general question is... is ARS possible to occur on the 5th/6th week? and also, I read about the "how was your seroconversion" thread and some of the posters mentioned swollen lymph nodes? does this mean swollen lymph nodes on one part of the body or ARS-related swollen lymphnodes should be everywhere? Just want to know. Thank you.

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: IM SCARED AND IM IM BREAKING DOWN
« Reply #16 on: October 07, 2008, 04:40:41 PM »
Ann warned you just minutes ago and you have ignored what she said. I'm giving you a time out. You had no risk for transmission. No wonder one of the guys you're pestering is ready to pull the plug on you too. This is all about feelings and has nothing realistically to do with HIV transmission.

If you have symptoms you're worried about go see your doctor. Swollen lymph nodes are absolutely NOT an HIV specific symptom. You just keep searching yet another new "sign" of an infection that couldn't exist because you did not have unsafe sex!

And if you can't get over the self-induced sexual hysteria, then I suggest you see a mental health professional and discuss the situation. This is not an HIV problem. It's a problem ABOUT your feelings about HIV.

You are now on a 28 day time out. Also, note that if you try to get around this time out by creating a new name for yourself that will get you instantly and permanently banned from the site.

« Last Edit: October 07, 2008, 04:52:37 PM by Andy Velez »
Andy Velez

Offline aznscared

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Re: IM SCARED AND IM IM BREAKING DOWN
« Reply #17 on: November 24, 2008, 10:05:21 AM »
hey guys.. I just came back from my 28 days TO and it wasnt fun. =(
anywho, i was in my microbiology class and my professor told us about the nature of a retrovirus. (hiv is a retrovirus isnt it?)..
 another question: do you guys have any idea what type of cells does an hiv virus attach to ( if ever a phage typing test was done to know what type of cells can this virus attach into) I'm just thinking what id the cells of the linings in the mouth are one of those cells (just wondering!)

 I also seen this commercial with Lysol.. it says that it kills HIV viruses..  I just find it ironic cause from what i have learned is that HIV cannot infect a person if its outside the hosts or it is exposed in the air. (does it mean hiv virus is a strict anaerobe? not a facultative anaerobe?)   

I apologize for asking these crazy stuff but this will help us learn more about HIV virus. thanks

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: IM SCARED AND IM IM BREAKING DOWN
« Reply #18 on: November 24, 2008, 10:28:32 AM »
AZ, we're not here to serve your research needs. There are libraries for that purpose. While I appreciate your quest for knowledge, we're here to respond to concerns about specific incidents and to evaluate the level of risk or non-risk.

Happily you do not at this point have a risk to be concerned about. Given your previous history here I have to say that continuing your focus on HIV is not a wise move on your part. Protecting yourself sexually regarding HIV is a very simple matter. It just means always using condoms for vaginal or anal intercourse. All of the other supposed risks are essentially theoretical.

Keep it simple and get on with your life is my suggestion.
Andy Velez

Offline aznscared

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Re: IM SCARED AND IM IM BREAKING DOWN
« Reply #19 on: December 09, 2008, 07:36:25 AM »
Just a quick question:

Is it possible to get infected if the outer surface of the condom came in contact with semen?

 I am just concerned because since my last incidents that brought me to this forums, I have been getting acne on my face. I dont know if this caused by changing my facial wash from Obagi skin care system to  salicylic acid.. my face gets small bumps with white heads that looks like pus. I switched to benzoyl peroxide.. seems like now my problem is extreme dry skin..which scared me also since its normal to hiv positive individuals to have an excessive dry skin.. pls help me.

I am also still concerned about the oral sex that I performed before that you guys told me a "very low risk " situation? Have you guys came across with a case that really got infected through oral sex??

If any of you guys teach or work in an HIV clinic, have you guys had a case that turned positive through oral sex?? pls help..


Offline Ann

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Re: IM SCARED AND IM IM BREAKING DOWN
« Reply #20 on: December 09, 2008, 07:48:46 AM »
az,

Neither acne nor dry skin are exclusive to hiv.

If you're going to continue to fret about the blowjob you gave, go test and collect your negative result. As a sexually active adult you should be having a full sexual health check-up at least once a year anyway.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline aznscared

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Re: IM SCARED AND IM IM BREAKING DOWN
« Reply #21 on: December 09, 2008, 08:06:23 AM »
ann what about the semen outside the surface of the condom when used before intercourse?

ie. like the outside part of the condom came in contact with semen and then flipped over inside out, is it a risk? Im just wondering...

Offline aznscared

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Re: IM SCARED AND IM IM BREAKING DOWN
« Reply #22 on: December 09, 2008, 08:46:22 AM »
anybody pls??

Offline Ann

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Re: IM SCARED AND IM IM BREAKING DOWN
« Reply #23 on: December 09, 2008, 09:02:56 AM »
az,

Hiv is a fragile, difficult to transmit virus. Once it finds itself outside the human body, small changes in temperature, moisture content and pH levels quickly damage the virus and render it unable to infect. So no, a bit of semen on the outside of the condom is not going to put you at risk for hiv.

Ann


Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline aznscared

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Re: IM SCARED AND IM IM BREAKING DOWN
« Reply #24 on: December 10, 2008, 08:18:53 AM »
I have a question... in oraquick testing.. they detect hiv antibodies right?? so does that mean hiv virus is present in the oral mucosa or lining of the mouth?? just wondering..?!?!?

Offline aznscared

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Re: IM SCARED AND IM IM BREAKING DOWN
« Reply #25 on: December 10, 2008, 09:01:09 AM »
anyone??

Offline RapidRod

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Re: IM SCARED AND IM IM BREAKING DOWN
« Reply #26 on: December 10, 2008, 09:33:57 AM »
You didn't have a risk. MOVE ON.

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: IM SCARED AND IM IM BREAKING DOWN
« Reply #27 on: December 10, 2008, 05:08:12 PM »
Yes, it does. Otherwise what would be the point of having it as test for HIV.

Give it up and get on with your life. Really.
Andy Velez

Offline aznscared

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Re: IM SCARED AND IM IM BREAKING DOWN
« Reply #28 on: December 11, 2008, 08:06:00 AM »
my question is how come saliva is not infectious when a swab in the mouth contains hiv antibodies? just wondering..

Offline RapidRod

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Re: IM SCARED AND IM IM BREAKING DOWN
« Reply #29 on: December 11, 2008, 09:51:38 AM »
Saliva is noninfectious. The small amount of HIV found in saliva does not have the ability to infect. Besides that, saliva has over a dozen different proteins and enzymes that inhibit HIV transmission. You would have known the answer if you would have read the lesson section on this forum.

Offline Ann

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Re: IM SCARED AND IM IM BREAKING DOWN
« Reply #30 on: December 11, 2008, 11:23:50 AM »
az,

Hiv and hiv antibodies are NOT the same thing.

One is a virus and the other is something your own body produces in response to the presence of the virus.

Antibodies are part of the immune system.

The hiv antibody tests look for hiv antibodies (funny enough) and NOT for the virus itself. Hiv antibodies will NOT infect you with hiv.

Not only is saliva not infectious, it also contains over a dozen different proteins and enzymes that damage hiv and render it unable to infect.

Keep posting about this NO RISK situation and you will be given a second time out - for 56 days this time.

You will not be warned again.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline aznscared

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Re: IM SCARED AND IM IM BREAKING DOWN
« Reply #31 on: December 13, 2008, 11:43:41 AM »
This post is not about my exposure but this really caught my attention..
(i am not posting the url link) ustrana's post really concerned me (him claiming he got infected through GETTING a head).. was he really confirmed +?

Offline RapidRod

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Re: IM SCARED AND IM IM BREAKING DOWN
« Reply #32 on: December 13, 2008, 11:46:19 AM »
Enough. You are looking to get a time out again.

Offline aznscared

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Re: IM SCARED AND IM IM BREAKING DOWN
« Reply #33 on: December 13, 2008, 11:51:48 AM »
my apologies.   Ustrasana's post just confused me... I dont want to get a time out or whatever soooo plsss dont.. im just trying to move on.. I am trying to convince myself I wasnt at risk, That's all.

Offline RapidRod

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Re: IM SCARED AND IM IM BREAKING DOWN
« Reply #34 on: December 13, 2008, 12:06:21 PM »
my apologies.   Ustrasana's post just confused me... I dont want to get a time out or whatever soooo plsss dont.. im just trying to move on.. I am trying to convince myself I wasnt at risk, That's all.


Keep posting about this NO RISK situation and you will be given a second time out - for 56 days this time.

You will not be warned again.
Ann

Did you have trouble understanding Ann's post?

Offline Ann

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  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: IM SCARED AND IM IM BREAKING DOWN
« Reply #35 on: December 13, 2008, 02:49:23 PM »
az,

He did NOT say he was infected through getting a blowjob. He said that was the only sex he had over a year and it happened two months before he posted - and he also says he knows he's been infected for more than a year.

I'm giving you that time out you've been warned about.

When I went to set up your time out, I discovered that you've created a second account here - worriedwell21 - to ask about a different person in the I Just Tested forum. You've been here long enough to know that creating second accounts is something we give permanent bans for. 

You are now permanently banned.

Ann
« Last Edit: December 13, 2008, 03:03:12 PM by Ann »
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"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

 


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