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Author Topic: Newly positive  (Read 1368 times)

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Offline Somedude

  • Member
  • Posts: 4
Newly positive
« on: July 22, 2014, 09:33:43 PM »
Last Wednesday I found out that I was HIV positive via a private test. The results were sent to me via email and I never received any counsel. Since then I have reached out to friends and they have pointed me toward a very good doctor that I will be seeing this Friday. I have already filed for FMLA to cover the days I will miss for appointments and simply because I am scared of everything right now and I am doing all I can to stay positive. Generally I am a very happy guy but lately I am all over the place. I am sad, I am exhausted, I am irritable, I am happy, I am angry at myself, I AM feeling everything right now and this alone annoys the crap out of me. I have made it a point to change nothing in my life and to keep spending time with friend and I am still trying to push myself hard at work and in my college courses. Even though I refuse to fall into the self pity trap, I am tired. All I can hope for at this point is that the MD can prescribe medications that will at least somewhat alleviate the exhaustion I feel as I need to get back to life so that I do not get depressed.


Offline Bowie-esq

  • Member
  • Posts: 46
  • Papa can you hear me...
Re: Newly positive
« Reply #1 on: July 23, 2014, 02:28:24 AM »
Hi Somedude, welcome to the forum - I'm sorry to hear about your diagnosis but glad you have found us. This is a great place to vent and find support, answers to questions. Browsing through old posts is a good way to begin educated yourself about this condition and how manageable it will be.

The emotions you are going through are all part of your process, one which we all have and do go through. Take each day, each hour, as it comes. Cry when you have to, get angry, it will pass. Then laugh and enjoy.

Talking through with your doctor or a therapist is also a good thing to do - and to keep in touch with a therapist afterwards for back up visits. There's a lot of processing to do, but taking support whether that is with your doctor, therapist, family/friends (if that is possible) or simply day or night on this forum is the best way to get along.

We are very blessed in 2014 with amazing advances in medication which will suppress the virus and keep you going.

Important things are: blood work, doctors appointments, mental and physical health. Which is what everybody should do whether positive or not.

Good luck and keep in touch with us here x
Infected: +\-01/2010

Tested positive 08/2010
28/07/11 CD4 420 9% v.l. 20500
16/10/11 CD4 320 10% v.l. 185000
10/11/11 begin Truvada/Viramune
29/12/11 CD4 410 13% v.l. 115
14/4/12 v.l. undetectable
05/7/12 CD4 520 19% v.l. UD
21/08/13 CD4 470 20% v.l. UD
19/12/13 CD4 430 23% v.l. UD

Offline anniebc

  • Member
  • Posts: 5,939
  • AM member since 2003
Re: Newly positive
« Reply #2 on: July 23, 2014, 03:18:33 AM »
Hi there

Welcome to the forum, everyone here is here to help out and answer any questions you may have, so don't be afraid to ask.

This is my standard reply to all new comers, I hope it helps in some small way.

Reaction to the results you have received is difffernt for everyone, but over time you will find a way of coping with the virus, one that suits you, and it might be quite differnt from how others deal with it.

No one here will ever tell you it's easy, it's ok to get angry or scared, but don't let it take over your life, stress is natural it can actually help some of us get through certain situations, but excessive stress can cause you physical symptoms and can damage your immune system further, just find ways to manage any stress you may be feeling, learn to relax and listen to your body.

Along with HIV comes anxiety and one way of tackling this is through information. gaining confidence in yourself and making informed decisions about your future.

Support is very important and you can get this from a qualified ID doctor, family and friends that you trust and there are many support organizations out there...just make sure whoever you discuss this with is sympathetic, supporting and non judgmental about your HIV status.

Most important of all you have to remember that being HIV+ does not stop you from being the person you were before your diagnosis.  Stay well and take care

Aroha
Jan
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
Never knock on deaths door..ring the bell and run..he really hates that.

Offline TheDancingCookie

  • Member
  • Posts: 13
  • All will be well.
Re: Newly positive
« Reply #3 on: July 23, 2014, 07:18:05 AM »
Hey SD

Newly diagnosed here also (27 June). You're allowed to be feeling stuff - lots of stuff. I certainly am. I've found these forums really useful for helping me feel less isolated. You're not alone.  :)

Offline NewAdventure1

  • Member
  • Posts: 28
Re: Newly positive
« Reply #4 on: July 23, 2014, 10:44:45 AM »
Hi

Newly diagnosed here as well as of June 3. It is an overwhelming and very gut wrenching feeling. But once you see the doctor and staff at the ID Office things will look up. I start meds today. Head up! PM me if needed.
02/2013 Tested Negative
Exposure between 02/2013-10/2013
06/03/2014 Tested Positive
06/06/2014  VL 787 CD4 881
07/08/2014 VL 1756 CD4 813
07/27/2014 Started Complera

Offline mecch

  • Member
  • Posts: 11,435
  • red pill? or blue pill?
Re: Newly positive
« Reply #5 on: July 23, 2014, 11:09:37 AM »
Hello somedude...  What do you mean a "private test"?  Did you get a Western Blot confirmation that you are HIV+....
“From each, according to his ability; to each, according to his need” 1875 K Marx

Offline wolfter

  • Member
  • Posts: 4,460
Re: Newly positive
« Reply #6 on: July 23, 2014, 11:16:17 AM »
You really need to have the results confirmed with a western blot confirmation.  You might be worrying needlessly.  If it does turn out to be a positive confirmation, there's no reason to think you can't still accomplish all your hopes and dreams.

take care and best wishes
wolfie
Complacency is the enemy.  ;)  Challenge yourself daily for maximum  return on investment.

Offline Poppy33

  • Member
  • Posts: 29
Re: Newly positive
« Reply #7 on: July 23, 2014, 05:15:49 PM »
Omgeee I can so relate. My anxiety level was thru the roof. I always had question that were not answered. I hated myself. I was depressed & so so sad. I was a victim. All of these feelings they say are to be expected. They seemed to be uncontrollable  also. I hope you can find comfort in my story. First off, don't take a leave of absent unless u are truly sick. Save your time for vacation. I was diagnose literally 6 weeks ago. When I was diagnosed my tcell count was 276 and my Vl was 109,996. I have been taking stribild for three weeks and just found out today that I am undetectable.  My tcell ct today is 875 & my viral load is 51. I'm sure I will still feel a certain way for a while, but today I feel like I can breathe. You can too. This is the goal. Take ur meds and become undetectable. Best of luck to you. I am here for u if you need to share.

Offline Somedude

  • Member
  • Posts: 4
Re: Newly positive
« Reply #8 on: July 23, 2014, 08:36:09 PM »
" Private " translates to me paying cash for the test.  It was not ordered by a doctor or provided by a clinic.  The results are delivered directly to the patient and not to any medical professional or clinic.  The result is that the results are delivered via email etc.

The test I paid for included the Western Blot as " Confirmation"

I am posting the results of this test below.



Panel 083824
HIV 1/O/2 Abs-Index Value 50.00 HIGH <1.00
Index Value: Specimen reactivity relative to the negative cutoff.
HIV 1/O/2 Abs, Qual Repeatedly Reactive ABNORMAL
.
HIV 1/2 Supplemental Ab Test
HIV 1 Ab Reactive ABNORMAL 
HIV 2 Ab Non Reactive Non Reactive

Note Comment
According to current CLSI guidelines, these results are presumptive
positive for HIV-1. Follow-up testing with qualitative or quantitative
RNA is recommended.

Thanks everyone for you concern and support!  :)

Offline wolfter

  • Member
  • Posts: 4,460
Re: Newly positive
« Reply #9 on: July 23, 2014, 09:45:38 PM »
who did the blood draw for this test? 

I've never known anyone who had the Western Blot test performed before a presumptive positive antibody test.
Complacency is the enemy.  ;)  Challenge yourself daily for maximum  return on investment.

Offline Somedude

  • Member
  • Posts: 4
Re: Newly positive
« Reply #10 on: July 24, 2014, 01:49:31 AM »
I am going to see a specialist that is known internationally for his work.  I have not met him yet, but I am confident that this person out of anyone would be the best person to administer my care.   Out of all the research I have done, I have come to one conclusion and that is that I need to be seen by a specialist who stays on top of the latest developments in therapy and so forth.

I am in no way giving up on my dreams and I am well aware that I need viral load tests and so forth and I am sure that this will be done this Friday.  Again, I am coping with this the best way I can but I also refuse to go on a roller coaster ride.  The result was 50 and the range is 1 or above to possibly positive, mine was 50 which is way out of range.   I have also had odd things happening  IE I had a random infection in my finger which required extensive IV antibiotics, an odd bump in my ear that became crazily infected and required that it be cut open and treated, there is a change in the look of my eyes and my energy level is no place near what it use to.  I am guessing that I am noticing this because I am very active person.

I know each of you are trying to help by saying that I need not worry until I get confirmation and there is a small part of me that hopes the test is wrong, but I work in the medical field and it is hard for me to ignore the knowledge that I already have.

I think it is important to note that I am feeling all sorts of ways right now, but I have not given up.    Here is an idea of my usual day -

1. Wake up early 5 am or earlier
2. Work for 10 hours
3. Go to the gym with friends and/or co workers
4. I work on my college course work
5. I spend time with a friend etc

Also, I am still applying for positions at work and I am still very much set on doing whatever I can for as long as I can.   As far I can tell, this can be decades of time.  Fact is, I am almost 30 and treatment these days has improved. 

while all of this suggests that I am just fine, that is not the case.  I am still dealing with this but I am not letting it take over my life. I have my moments such as today.  I left work after just a few hours because my brain shut off and I needed to cry it out.  I did this, took a long nap and then met up with friends at the gym and here I am.

The sooner I accept this, the sooner I can get back to my normal life but to this I need to quit trying to schedule my emotions around everything else, which is what I have done thus far.



Offline mecch

  • Member
  • Posts: 11,435
  • red pill? or blue pill?
Re: Newly positive
« Reply #11 on: July 24, 2014, 04:32:27 AM »
Hey nobody said not to worry.

People are going to be hesitant to comment until you see a flesh and blood health professional and get  confirmation that you are HIV+.  Its not easy to understand what kind of test you have had and you are being a bit cagey about the whole thing.

It happens every year, that people come here absolutely convinced they are HIV+ and with symptoms to "prove it" but finally, lucky for them, its not the case.

i am sure if indeed you are HIV+ you will be fine and also a welcomed member here. Also nobody needs a world-famous specialist to do well with an HIV diagnosis and treatment.  A competent ID from the local area is just fine.  But good for you if you will have such a specialist.

The limbo period you are in must be just as stressful as someone who actually gets a confirmed diagnosis so I hope you see this specialist soon and put some numbers on your situation. Don't let this drag on too long. You can go to any clinic or even your GP to get the ball rolling on labs....
“From each, according to his ability; to each, according to his need” 1875 K Marx

Offline Somedude

  • Member
  • Posts: 4
Re: Newly positive
« Reply #12 on: August 17, 2014, 10:06:24 PM »
This has been the longest wait ever!  We are going on almost 30 days since they pulled my blood to check for viral levels and so forth.   The only test they have back at this point is the test that confirmed my ability to take certain HIV medications.  This whole experience has stressed me out incredibly, but I am a bit proud of myself.  I have managed to miss only 3 days of work and I have managed to upkeep my college courses.
The people around me have to think I am losing my mind! I was sad, then I was angry and now I am just sensitive.  I feel bad that they are on this emotional roller coaster, but do not know the reason why. 
Either way, the people in my life have been incredibly supportive and they do not seem to care what the root cause of any this is.  They are simply interested in being sure that I am ok.   
The 25th will mark 30 days since the blood work and I am not getting anxious about what I am going to feel when it actually comes back.   In some ways, I think this delay has been for the best. 

Offline mecch

  • Member
  • Posts: 11,435
  • red pill? or blue pill?
Re: Newly positive
« Reply #13 on: August 19, 2014, 05:43:00 PM »
Blood work doesn't take 30 days.  What is going wrong here?
“From each, according to his ability; to each, according to his need” 1875 K Marx

Offline absopozilutely

  • Member
  • Posts: 227
  • Love to chat/text/talk/encourage!
Re: Newly positive
« Reply #14 on: Yesterday at 09:39:01 AM »
Blood work doesn't take 30 days.  What is going wrong here?
Agreed there's no way the genotype came back before everything else, absolutely no way, Mecch you're right about hesitation in posting, it's why I'm not posting, something's not adding up correctly.
12/18 Infected
2/4 12:22pm tested POZ via ORAquick
2/19 WB Confirmation
2/4-2/19 VL 104,678 CD4 407
3/2 Genotype back, and Started Complera
4/2-CD4 688 38% and VL 1,600
5/1-CD4 592 42% and VL 336
5/22-CD4 732 31% and VL 109 :( STILL NOT UD!
5/31 Switched to Stribild :( I'll miss you Complera!
6/19 CD4 508 35% and VL UD!!!!! Crying at work like a baby.

Offline drewm

  • Member
  • Posts: 1,076
  • I have a sling and a dungeon :-P
Re: Newly positive
« Reply #15 on: Yesterday at 04:13:49 PM »
Blood work doesn't take 30 days.  What is going wrong here?
[/b]
Diagnosed in  May of 2010 with teh AIDS.

PCP Pneumonia . CD4 8 . VL 500,000


Numbers consistent since 12/2010 - VL has remained undetectable and CD4 is anywhere from 275-325

Offline newtome

  • Member
  • Posts: 10
Re: Newly positive
« Reply #16 on: Yesterday at 08:24:36 PM »
My blood work took two weeks, agonizing.  Maybe a lab issue? 

Offline absopozilutely

  • Member
  • Posts: 227
  • Love to chat/text/talk/encourage!
Re: Newly positive
« Reply #17 on: Yesterday at 10:31:40 PM »
2 weeks is normal for western Blot or genotype.
12/18 Infected
2/4 12:22pm tested POZ via ORAquick
2/19 WB Confirmation
2/4-2/19 VL 104,678 CD4 407
3/2 Genotype back, and Started Complera
4/2-CD4 688 38% and VL 1,600
5/1-CD4 592 42% and VL 336
5/22-CD4 732 31% and VL 109 :( STILL NOT UD!
5/31 Switched to Stribild :( I'll miss you Complera!
6/19 CD4 508 35% and VL UD!!!!! Crying at work like a baby.

 


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