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Author Topic: condom broke during insertive anal sex  (Read 21216 times)

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Offline TerrifiednMiami

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condom broke during insertive anal sex
« on: August 10, 2008, 11:48:38 AM »
After having sex and cumming i noticed the condom broke. I used  massage oil instead of lube and I came in the guy as the top. He say he was neg and I know i am neg, i was just tested. What are my chances of testing neg? Im very worried and scared. I guess from  fear and stree i have made myself get body aches real bad since this episode
. Please

Offline RapidRod

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Re: condom broke during insertive anal sex
« Reply #1 on: August 10, 2008, 11:56:57 AM »
You were protected until the condom failed. Get a test 3 months post exposure to obtain your conclusive test result.

Offline TerrifiednMiami

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Re: condom broke during insertive anal sex
« Reply #2 on: August 10, 2008, 12:41:26 PM »
What do u think my chances of staying negative will be? Im getting veyr depressed

Offline TerrifiednMiami

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Re: condom broke during insertive anal sex
« Reply #3 on: August 10, 2008, 12:56:02 PM »
What do u think my chances of staying negative will be? Im getting very depressed.Andy Im terrified. Waiting 3 months!!!As the top and condome breaking if he was poz which he says hes not what r the chances if hes lieing to me?

Offline TerrifiednMiami

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Re: condom broke during insertive anal sex
« Reply #4 on: August 10, 2008, 05:51:05 PM »
What do u think my chances of staying negative will be? Im getting very depressed.Andy Im terrified. Waiting 3 months!!!As the top and condome breaking if he was poz which he says hes not what r the chances if hes lieing to me?

Offline jkinatl2

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Re: condom broke during insertive anal sex
« Reply #5 on: August 10, 2008, 11:32:03 PM »
seeing as how the insertive partner is at dramatically lower risk for HIV than the penetrated partner, and due to the fact that you were protected until the condom broke, I do not see this as a viable HIV consideration. For your own sake, a test at three months will give you peace of mind, but most serodiscordant couples would likely notworry too much over this incident, and neither should you.

However, oil based lubrication on a latex condom? That's just silly. They make EXCELLENT lubes nowadays for latex condoms. I highly recommend the investment.
"Many people, especially in the gay community, turn to oral sex as a safer alternative in the age of AIDS. And with HIV rates rising, people need to remember that oral sex is safer sex. It's a reasonable alternative."

-Kimberly Page-Shafer, PhD, MPH

Welcome Thread

Offline TerrifiednMiami

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Re: condom broke during insertive anal sex
« Reply #6 on: August 11, 2008, 08:45:28 PM »
Im getting body aches and what seems to be  like a flu. Body aches sleepy and sneezy. How soon can i do a PCR test? Im not sure if Im sick from seroconversion flu or stress and anxiety can u  help please?

Offline RapidRod

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Re: condom broke during insertive anal sex
« Reply #7 on: August 11, 2008, 10:53:29 PM »
You don't do a PCR test. They are not approved diagnostic tests. You do an antibody test.

Offline TerrifiednMiami

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Re: condom broke during insertive anal sex
« Reply #8 on: August 12, 2008, 10:12:33 AM »
I am very well aware of antibody testing. AT this point I feel I might as well die. I have no energy no appetite body and muscle aches and itching all over since saturday the day after my risky exposure. My nerves are a wreck and its not easy to sit here and wait for six weeks or 3 months to say the least. It was just a  question. If I got exposed to hiv can you tell me when if I would feel any type of seroconversion illness or flu? Or is what I am feeling depression or anxiety? How easy is it for a top to catch hiv? I would prefer Andy to answer this since he is more expressive and empathetic in his emails. Thank you

Offline RapidRod

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Re: condom broke during insertive anal sex
« Reply #9 on: August 12, 2008, 10:32:59 AM »
Your symptoms came on to early to be related to HIV. We can't help you with the waiting period. 3 months is when you can obtain your conclusive test result.

Offline TerrifiednMiami

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Re: Andy the condom broke during insertive anal sex
« Reply #10 on: August 12, 2008, 10:39:55 AM »
I am very well aware of antibody testing. AT this point I feel I might as well die. I have no energy no appetite body and muscle aches and itching all over since saturday the day after my risky exposure. My nerves are a wreck and its not easy to sit here and wait for six weeks or 3 months to say the least. It was just a  question. If I got exposed to hiv can you tell me when if I would feel any type of seroconversion illness or flu? Or is what I am feeling depression or anxiety? How easy is it for a top to catch hiv? I would prefer Andy to answer this since he is more expressive and empathetic in his emails. Thank you 

Offline RapidRod

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Re: condom broke during insertive anal sex
« Reply #11 on: August 12, 2008, 10:49:08 AM »
Not all people have ARS that do get infected.  HIV has no specific symptoms and are never reliable. I'm glad you understand antibody testing because that is what you will be using to obtain your test results.

Offline TerrifiednMiami

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Re: condom broke during insertive anal sex
« Reply #12 on: August 12, 2008, 10:51:58 AM »
How easy is it for a top to catch hiv when the condom breaks? The guy I had sex with says he was neg but still are the odds in my favor? I was the top

Offline RapidRod

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Re: condom broke during insertive anal sex
« Reply #13 on: August 12, 2008, 11:09:44 AM »
Less than being the receiver but it is a risk. Odds are for horse racing not assessing risks of HIV.

Offline TerrifiednMiami

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Re: condom broke during insertive anal sex
« Reply #14 on: August 12, 2008, 11:21:21 AM »
I will go get tested but what have been the outcomes with situations like mine?

Offline Ann

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Re: condom broke during insertive anal sex
« Reply #15 on: August 12, 2008, 11:36:15 AM »
TM,

I've yet to see a top end up hiv positive following a condom break. I don't expect you to be the first.

You should have an hiv antibody test NO EARLIER than six weeks, as the vast majority of people who have actually been infected will seroconvert and test positive by then. A six week negative result MUST be confirmed at three months.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline TerrifiednMiami

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Re: condom broke during insertive anal sex
« Reply #16 on: August 12, 2008, 11:39:55 AM »
Ann

You have no idea how much that means to me. My head was talking so loud that i began to believe I could be the one top in the world to get hiv from a broken condom after ejaculation.  I know its hard for me, afterall i used a condom and it broke!!!

Offline TerrifiednMiami

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Re: condom broke during insertive anal sex
« Reply #17 on: August 12, 2008, 12:37:01 PM »
Ann

Im so concerned because my bones and muscles ache so bad constantly. No appetite and itching all over all i want to do is sleep and lay down. Can this be seroconversion?

Offline TerrifiednMiami

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Re: condom broke during insertive anal sex
« Reply #18 on: August 12, 2008, 02:32:27 PM »
I feel so sick my bones and muscles are so  painful and sore and have no energy all i want to do is sleep is this seroconversion?

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: condom broke during insertive anal sex
« Reply #19 on: August 12, 2008, 03:42:09 PM »
No, that is NOT seroconversion. Discuss your symptoms with your doctor.

The likelihood that you will test positive from that single incident during which you were protected for at least a part of the time is very remote.

During the waiting time you need to stop with the drama and feeling sorry for yourself. What you need to do is to get productively busy with other things and the waiting time will pass more quickly than you may imagine is possible. Really.

I expect you to come out of this ok.
Andy Velez

Offline TerrifiednMiami

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Re: condom broke during insertive anal sex
« Reply #20 on: August 14, 2008, 07:14:56 PM »
Well  it is now six days past possible exposure and now I have a cold. I woke up this morning with a mild sore throat  felt as if i had a fever allday but when i took the temp it wasn't high, muscle pains  body aches and stuffy nose and sneezing. When if it does show does the hiv viral seroconversion  flu show up?

Offline Ann

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Re: condom broke during insertive anal sex
« Reply #21 on: August 14, 2008, 08:04:40 PM »
TM,

Sometimes a cold is just a cold. Most of the time, in fact.

I've yet to see a top end up hiv positive following a condom break. I don't expect you to be the first.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline TerrifiednMiami

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  • Posts: 23
Re: condom broke during insertive anal sex
« Reply #22 on: August 16, 2008, 08:29:55 PM »
Its been 8days and now i have developed a wicked cold nasal congestion, aches, feel warm, sore throat, sneezing and feeling terrible.No appetite a real bad cold. Can Hiv serconversion causes cold too or only flu. Even though I went to see my doctor she says nothing t worry  about but she wanted to  do a viral load test she says hiv viral load will detect  5-10 days after exposure especially since I'm sick. So I'm waiting n these results and A Elisa antibody

Offline Ann

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    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: condom broke during insertive anal sex
« Reply #23 on: August 16, 2008, 08:39:54 PM »
TM,

Seroconversion illness, when it happens (it doesn't alway happen in a noticeable way) is much more like flu. It's not like a head-cold, which is what you are describing.

Once again, as the insertive partner, you are unlikely to have been infected. I've yet to see a top end up hiv positive following a condom break. I don't expect you to be the first.

However, I am getting fed up with repeating myself. There aren't ANY details you could add at this point that will change the advice you've had so far. Re-read your thread when you're feeling unsure. There's nothing new we can add.

In a nutshell:

You've had a small risk. You are more likely to win the 10 million dollar lottery than end up positive over  a condom break.

Test at three months to be sure. As a sexually active adult, you should be testing yearly anyway, as a matter of routine. Consider your test over this incident as the beginning of your routine yearly tests.

We don't expect you to test anything other than hiv negative.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline TerrifiednMiami

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Re: condom broke during insertive anal sex
« Reply #24 on: September 03, 2008, 04:54:45 PM »
Well here I am at 4 weeks post  possible exposre and im very sick. I have had tightness in my chest  some sore throat body aches and spacey feelings and tension I cant think clear and all I want to do is sleep. Im not sleeping at night and get up every 2 hours and sleepy all day Im scared this is the start of ARC and with difficulty breathing the start of PCP. I got a hiv test yester at 4 weeks post and was neg now I still need to keep testing. IM VERY SCARED WORRIED AND TERRIFIED. What if the condom broke from the beginning and he was positive? I keep running to the free clinic for hiv tests weekly to deal with the anxiety!

Offline TerrifiednMiami

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Re: condom broke during insertive anal sex
« Reply #25 on: September 03, 2008, 04:56:21 PM »
Well here I am at 4 weeks post  possible exposre and im very sick. I have had tightness in my chest  some sore throat body aches and spacey feelings and tension I cant think clear and all I want to do is sleep. Im not sleeping at night and get up every 2 hours and sleepy all day Im scared this is the start of ARC and with difficulty breathing the start of PCP. I got a hiv test yester at 4 weeks post and was neg now I still need to keep testing. IM VERY SCARED WORRIED AND TERRIFIED. What if the condom broke from the beginning and he was positive? I keep running to the free clinic for hiv tests weekly to deal with the anxiety!

Offline RapidRod

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Re: condom broke during insertive anal sex
« Reply #26 on: September 03, 2008, 04:59:54 PM »
I've got news for you, you don't have PCP.

Offline TerrifiednMiami

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Re: condom broke during insertive anal sex
« Reply #27 on: September 03, 2008, 05:05:46 PM »
A friend of mine who was diagnosed with hiv  started PCP by a heavy feeling in his chest and couldnt take in air thats how i feel. Well here I am at 4 weeks post  possible exposre and im very sick. I have had tightness in my chest  some sore throat body aches and spacey feelings and tension I cant think clear and all I want to do is sleep. Im not sleeping at night and get up every 2 hours and sleepy all day Im scared this is the start of ARC and with difficulty breathing the start of PCP. I got a hiv test yester at 4 weeks post and was neg now I still need to keep testing. IM VERY SCARED WORRIED AND TERRIFIED. What if the condom broke from the beginning and he was positive? I keep running to the free clinic for hiv tests weekly to deal with the anxiety!

Offline TerrifiednMiami

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Re: condom broke during insertive anal sex
« Reply #28 on: September 03, 2008, 05:08:41 PM »
A friend of mine who was diagnosed with hiv  started PCP by a heavy feeling in his chest and couldnt take in air thats how i feel. Well here I am at 4 weeks post  possible exposre and im very sick. I have had tightness in my chest  some sore throat body aches and spacey feelings and tension I cant think clear and all I want to do is sleep. Im not sleeping at night and get up every 2 hours and sleepy all day Im scared this is the start of ARC and with difficulty breathing the start of PCP. I got a hiv test yester at 4 weeks post and was neg now I still need to keep testing. IM VERY SCARED WORRIED AND TERRIFIED. What if the condom broke from the beginning and he was positive? I keep running to the free clinic for hiv tests weekly to deal with the anxiety! 

Offline RapidRod

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Re: condom broke during insertive anal sex
« Reply #29 on: September 03, 2008, 05:12:34 PM »
People at risk for PCP have a CD4 less than 200 and even if you tested positive, your CD4s would not be even close to 200 within 4 weeks or even the first year.

Offline TerrifiednMiami

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Re: condom broke during insertive anal sex
« Reply #30 on: September 03, 2008, 05:23:40 PM »
What about the fatigue and sleepiness and achy flu like symptoms. I had a bad cold first week after the  possible exposure now i got this wierg thing going on seem like all i want to do is sleep and i feel ready out of it. Sore throat and spacey feeling.

I had a few days and nights of bad swets. Im scared it may be ARC. I went to do the ORASURE which detects hiv by rubbing the gums with a applicator have u heard of this and it was negative

Offline TerrifiednMiami

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Re: condom broke during insertive anal sex
« Reply #31 on: September 03, 2008, 05:35:08 PM »
What about the fatigue and sleepiness and achy flu like symptoms. I had a bad cold first week after the  possible exposure now i got this wierg thing going on seem like all i want to do is sleep and i feel ready out of it. Sore throat and spacey feeling.

I had a few days and nights of bad swets. Im scared it may be ARC. I went to do the ORASURE which detects hiv by rubbing the gums with a applicator have u heard of this and it was negative

Offline RapidRod

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Re: condom broke during insertive anal sex
« Reply #32 on: September 03, 2008, 06:10:07 PM »
Stop with the double posting. When someone is available, they will answer your post.

Offline TerrifiednMiami

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Re: condom broke during insertive anal sex
« Reply #33 on: September 03, 2008, 07:02:03 PM »
What about the fatigue and sleepiness and achy flu like symptoms. I had a bad cold first week after the  possible exposure now i got this wierg thing going on seem like all i want to do is sleep and i feel ready out of it. Sore throat and spacey feeling.

I had a few days and nights of bad swets. Im scared it may be ARC. I went to do the ORASURE which detects hiv by rubbing the gums with a applicator have u heard of this and it was negative. Sorry to post  again didnt want my question to be ignored.

Offline jkinatl2

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Re: condom broke during insertive anal sex
« Reply #34 on: September 03, 2008, 07:23:18 PM »
Wow.

OK, stop this right here.

I am recovering from PCP. Was in the hospital for two weeks. You do NOT have PCP. No way no how. Being all AIDSY and dramatic is really off-putting, especially for those of us who actually HAVE the virus and its associated nasties.

This forum DOES NOT ADDRESS SYMPTOMS. Why? Because they are ABSOLUTELY IRRELEVANT insofar as HIV diagnosis is concerned.

You had a small risk. Period. This has been addressed. Test at three months after the event, and move on.

That is ALL you can do. That is all you SHOULD do. That is all this forum is equipped to handle. We are NOT a support forum for worried wells. We are a support site for HIV INFECTED people who put up this single forum as a courtesy to those, like yourself, who have fears.

We disseminate information and do risk assessment based on current first-tiered, peer-reviewed science. And this does NOT include diagnosing ARS or anything else via symptoms.

You should not use massage oil with latex condoms. Only lubricants specifically designed to be used with latex condoms should be used, especially in anal sex, where the friction is greater. You learned that the hard way. Now you know.

It is EXTREMELY unlikely you will test positive. Your risk was minimal. Real, yes. But minimal. and this is even assuming your partner was positive - a fact NOT in evidence.

So please, stop with the dramatics. If your symptoms are freaking you out, go see a doctor. You could have mono. Or a myriad of other things. What you DON'T have is a full-on AIDS Opportunistic infection.

With that, I respectfully withdraw from further communication until you have taken your three month test. I fully expect you to report a negative result. And sadly, I fully expect you not to accept it. And so it goes.

Sorry to sound cranky, but mentioning PCP was totally over the top.

« Last Edit: September 03, 2008, 08:30:26 PM by jkinatl2 »
"Many people, especially in the gay community, turn to oral sex as a safer alternative in the age of AIDS. And with HIV rates rising, people need to remember that oral sex is safer sex. It's a reasonable alternative."

-Kimberly Page-Shafer, PhD, MPH

Welcome Thread

Offline TerrifiednMiami

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Re: condom broke during insertive anal sex
« Reply #35 on: September 03, 2008, 07:41:22 PM »
Being cranky and nasty and rude was uncalled for as well. If you think Im on here for fun and drama you have me mistaken! I would never answer anyone the way you did no matter how someone feels and if they are hiv neg or poz. If you cant answer someones concerns in a diplomatic fashion then you shouldnt be answering at all. YOU DIDNT HAVE TO RUB IT IN MY FACE!

You have no right to get on here and assume im full of drama and be nasty. All I asked was a few simple  questions that obviously rubbed you the wrong way. Im sorry to have bothered you and wasted my time addressing my concerns here. 

Offline RapidRod

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Re: condom broke during insertive anal sex
« Reply #36 on: September 03, 2008, 08:51:28 PM »
You have been given the correct information. Now either accept it or move on to another forum.

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: condom broke during insertive anal sex
« Reply #37 on: September 03, 2008, 09:49:30 PM »
Terrified, this has to stop right now. Your concern about the incident during which the condom broke has been carefully and accurately responded to by several of our knowledgeable regulars. You have a waiting period to get through until you can collect what we all expect is going to be a negative result.

You simply cannot keep returning again and again with your last symptom and anxiety report. You need to focus on other productive activities in your life during the waiting period. And if you continue to have troubling symptoms that's something for you to discuss with your doctor. There is certainly nothing HIV-specific about anything you are reporting.

If you come back again with the same kind of handwringing about symptoms and essentially ignoring what's been said to you, you're going to get timed out for 28 days. Consider yourself warned.

Now, get busy with other things and your waiting time will pass more quickly and easily than you may imagine is possible.
Andy Velez

Offline TerrifiednMiami

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Re: condom broke during insertive anal sex
« Reply #38 on: September 04, 2008, 09:01:01 AM »
Hey Everyone

Im sorry if I posed any problems. Im just a little scared. I will wait and retest at 6 weeks and again at 13 weeks. Thank you for your help.

T

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: condom broke during insertive anal sex
« Reply #39 on: September 04, 2008, 09:19:58 AM »
You're welcome. And I'll repeat, get busy with other matters and your waiting time will pass more quickly than you may imagine is possible.

Good luck with your tests which I expect will be negative.
Andy Velez

Offline theAdviserMe

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Re: condom broke during insertive anal sex
« Reply #40 on: September 04, 2008, 10:02:38 AM »
Please be careful next time...especially having sex with someone you are not sure of. And use a better type of condom next time around.

Offline RapidRod

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Re: condom broke during insertive anal sex
« Reply #41 on: September 04, 2008, 11:08:19 AM »
theAdviserMe, please do not post in this forum unless you have been given permission by the Moderators. This forum is not like the other forums when it comes to posting.

Only those Moderators and members who are authorized to answer questions in the Am I Infected? forum are permitted do so. Unauthorized responses may be deleted without permission of the poster. Repeatedly posting replies of this nature may result in a Time Out or permanent ban, at the discretion of the Moderator Team.


Offline Andy Velez

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Re: condom broke during insertive anal sex
« Reply #42 on: September 04, 2008, 12:51:27 PM »
Adviser, as Rod has pointed out, only those authorized to do so ought to be replying to questioners here. However well intentioned your motives, please follow our rule about this.

Also, your admonition noted below is actually not quite on the mark. The use of condoms should always be followed no matter what one thinks one knows about a sexual partner's status. And that should be the rule until if and when someone is in a securely monogamous relationship in which both partners test negative at the same time.

Please be careful next time...especially having sex with someone you are not sure of. And use a better type of condom next time around.
Andy Velez

 


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