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Author Topic: I cheated - now I'm paying the price.  (Read 1696 times)

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Offline stupefied

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I cheated - now I'm paying the price.
« on: July 07, 2008, 08:14:55 PM »
I'm new to the forum and I hope someone can help me out.  My deal: On May 13 I had a huge fight with my bf.  I went to a local YMCA to work out.  Afterwards, I went into the steam room and hooked up with this guy I've seen there once or twice. I don't usually do this type thing but I was mad at my bf...sorry excuse.   By hook up I mean I let him perform oral on me with a condom. Before we did anything, he left the steam room and came back in( I think to go to his locker for condon).  I then left and returned when it was empty, just him.  He pulled out a condom and started to put it on me. It was steamy and kind of dark and he was having a hard time so once he got it over my head, I helped roll it up.  He sucked for less than 2 minutes and was interupted when some guy came in so he  quickly left the steam room.  I wrapped a towel around myself and left the steam room.  I took the condom off and flushed it.  After I showered I noticed blood on the edge of my towel.  I had no idea where it came from....maybe the guys mouth?  A few days later a friend of mine told me he heard about a guy at the gym giving guys head and using the same condon over and over.  Now my mind is racing.  My fears and questions:

1.  If this was the same guy and he put a used condon on me, would that be considered a risk/exposure?  What if there was blood or semen in the tip, could HIV be transmitted that way?   The steam room was dark and steamy and I could not see that well to examine the tip of the condom, nor did I examine it when I took it off.

2.  Should I get tested? and if so, can I test now?  I know the standard is 3months, but I also read somewhere you can test at 22-30 days.

My nerves are on end.  IF the guilt wasn't enough - now I'm terrified to have sex with my bf of 3 years.

Excuse any mistakes - I just needed to get this out>


Offline Matty the Damned

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Re: I cheated - now I'm paying the price.
« Reply #1 on: July 07, 2008, 08:17:54 PM »
Receiving a blow-job, protected or unprotected, is not a risk for HIV transmission. You do not need to test.

As for your guilt, well that's your issue. We can't help you with that. Please take the time to read our Welcome Thread and follow the links to our Lessons to learn more about how HIV is and is not transmitted.

MtD

Offline stupefied

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Re: I cheated - now I'm paying the price.
« Reply #2 on: July 07, 2008, 08:30:44 PM »
Matty - Thanks for the quick response.  I do understand BJ are not  a risk, but my concern is the use of used condoms.  As far fetched as this scenario may seem, it is a real concern for me.  Yea, I"ll deal with the guilt - maybe tats what fueling my fear.

Offline Matty the Damned

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Re: I cheated - now I'm paying the price.
« Reply #3 on: July 07, 2008, 08:40:06 PM »
Yeah, that whole "heard about a guy who reuses condoms" thing sounds like traditional gay rumour to me. I wouldn't believe it. If you're worried about it (I don't think you should be) then test 13 weeks from the date of this encounter.

If you're sexually active and not in a secure monogamous relationship (and let's face it, you're not) then you should be having a full STD screen at least once a year. Twice is better. Please note that I'm not suggesting you need to test over this incident, I'm just saying it's a good habit to get into.

If you do decided to be tested, I totally expect that you will test negative and so should you.

MtD

Offline stupefied

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Re: I cheated - now I'm paying the price.
« Reply #4 on: July 07, 2008, 08:58:06 PM »
That was the first I've ever cheated, but point taken. But assuming that scenerio is truly the case, would it be considered a risk of exposure? Not trying to be difficult, just worried senseless.

Offline Matty the Damned

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Re: I cheated - now I'm paying the price.
« Reply #5 on: July 07, 2008, 09:27:53 PM »
Doll,

The fact that you rolled the condom down over your wing-wang tells me it was new from the packet. It's next to impossible to re-roll a condom. In any event, putting used condoms on is a real hassle and in my experience guys in sex-joints don't like real hassles when it comes to fucking, they just like to get it on.

MtD

Offline stupefied

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  • Posts: 4
Re: I cheated - now I'm paying the price.
« Reply #6 on: July 07, 2008, 09:51:03 PM »
Again, you have a point.  But now I question where the blood on my towel came from. Did he have blood in his mouth?  Could it have gotten into the condom accidentalyy/deliberately? I haven't seen the guy since that day to question him. Forgive me for going super paranoid, I just don't want to make anynmore mistakes or hurt anyone. My peace of mind lies in a negative test at 13 months.  Oner last
 

Offline Matty the Damned

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Re: I cheated - now I'm paying the price.
« Reply #7 on: July 07, 2008, 10:06:51 PM »
Look kid, calm down.

You don't know that it was blood and in any event it's really no big deal. Maybe the chap had bad oral hygiene. Whatever it was you were wearing a rubber so I don't see anything to fuss over.

Like I said, if you're that stressed over it, get tested.

One other thing, the window period for HIV testing is 13 weeks not 13 months.

MtD

 


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