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Author Topic: I am fine with being home...  (Read 2541 times)

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bleueyes

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I am fine with being home...
« on: May 06, 2008, 08:56:55 AM »
People think I am stupid I guess but, I want whatever good times to be with someone I love. In life we have children and marry. If we choose.
I just take care of my daughter. We go to the park, library, and out for groceries. Sometimes out to eat. I go to her school occasionally to see how things are.
I love my daughter and wish I could have more children! I am almost tempted. Considering I had my daughter 1 1/2 years after my diagnosis, she is HIV negative.
This man I dated four years ago taught me that things are better with someone to share them with. I am tired of being angry! I want to be loved and I want to love.
For the time being I take an online course in accounting.
I weigh 182 and I'm 5'7" tall. Today I am fine with this. I know what I want.
I want to be a Mother and a wife. And this accounting thing I can do from home at times. I feel this is something positive to do in my spare time.
Plus I found out that I can cook better every week. Recently my daughter noticed that I put the meat in the oven and sat down to read, youtube or watch TV. Maybe clean. She asked how can you tell when the meat is done when you don't watch the time?! I never noticed but, this was amazing to me. I became good at something. And cooking no less... Basically I can smell it is what I told her. Feel the warmth of the oven heating the rooms. I look in the oven from time to time.
Well I never knew home can be a learning experience. 
Two nights ago I finished a 275 page book in three hours. A book my daughter picked out for me. I remember I used to love to read. Nothing serious or factual. I love mystery, vampires and some romance. The romance I used to read was Luanne Rice. On accident... she was next to Anne Rice. I was curious.
I am onto a new book now. This renewed fascination with reading came from the fact my daughter picks out my books. And I had a visit at the Optometrist and found out I had 20/20 vision. He said My daughter and I both have perfect site. Which is great news to me since all my immediate family needs glasses since a younger age. So let me use it while I have it!!!
Today I go to check out a possible new home. I will be renting! But, I will be closer to my pharmacy and doctor. I hope I get it.
I guess I'll end this here.
Still trying to figure the site out...
Ida

Offline BT65

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Re: I am fine with being home...
« Reply #1 on: May 06, 2008, 09:44:47 AM »
Ida, good luck with the house.  I hope you get it as well.
I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

Offline Dragonette

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Re: I am fine with being home...
« Reply #2 on: May 06, 2008, 10:27:58 AM »
sounds very cozy. I love reading as well but dont do it enough b/c of reading a lot for work. sometimes I read at the gym while using the stepper.
wishing you luck with finding a partner & with the new place
"If you keep one foot in yesterday, and one in tomorrow, you piss all over today". Betty Tacy

 


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