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Author Topic: not sure about sex  (Read 3115 times)

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Offline canyouhelp

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not sure about sex
« on: April 24, 2008, 06:50:59 PM »
Hello...I was recently with a girl we messed about and stuff and she was very forward and wanted sex.I didnt want to and after a while fell asleep next to her while she was still awake.Would it hav been possible for her to have sex with me while I was sleeping or would I have woken up and known something was happening....I had a few drinks but wasnt really drunk at all.I remember faling asleep but thats about it.

Offline Matty the Damned

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Re: not sure about sex
« Reply #1 on: April 24, 2008, 06:57:04 PM »
o.O

So you think that this girl had her wicked way with you while you slept?

If you don't know then how can we?

In any event, all sexually active adults should have a full STD screen at least once a year. Twice is better. A full screen will include but is not limited to an HIV antibody test. If it's been a while since your last full screen or if you've never had one before you should contact your doctor or local sexual health clinic.

Please note that in suggesting that you have a full screen I am not saying you were at risk of contracting HIV or any other STD. Regular sexual health screening is simply a good habit to get into in much the same way you might get your car serviced on a regular basis.

You should also take the time to read our Welcome Thread and familiarise yourself with our posting guidelines.

MtD

Offline canyouhelp

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Re: not sure about sex
« Reply #2 on: April 24, 2008, 07:00:08 PM »
Thanks :)

No what Im saying is would I have known if she had had sex with me for example woken up!  Or could she have had sex with me while I was sleeping and me be unaware of it?

Offline Matty the Damned

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Re: not sure about sex
« Reply #3 on: April 24, 2008, 07:14:59 PM »
No what Im saying is would I have known if she had had sex with me for example woken up!  Or could she have had sex with me while I was sleeping and me be unaware of it?

And I repeat, how on earth do you expect us to know? We weren't there. You should probably stop with this before it gets out of hand. As I said, read our posting guidelines.

MtD


Offline canyouhelp

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Re: not sure about sex
« Reply #4 on: April 24, 2008, 07:17:48 PM »
what do you mean gets out of hand ,what part of the guidelines are you relating to.Im just worried as to whether I wouldve noticed someone having sex with me or not

Offline Matty the Damned

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Re: not sure about sex
« Reply #5 on: April 24, 2008, 07:23:23 PM »
Quite frankly the idea that this woman waited until you went to sleep and then ravished you is more than faintly ridiculous. Presumably you would have woken up, then again you may not have. I don't know. I don't really care.

What's relevant here is that you have unfounded anxieties around HIV. In my opinion (and that of any other sensible person) the scenario you outlined would not have happened.

Our guidelines prohibit people posting endlessly about non-risk situations. The advice I gave you in my original reply covers all bases in this case. If you follow it you'll be ok.

If you are having difficulties coping with your fears about HIV infection you should seek the services of a mental health professional. We are unable to provide you with that sort of support.

MtD

Offline canyouhelp

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  • Posts: 12
Re: not sure about sex
« Reply #6 on: April 24, 2008, 07:27:10 PM »
yes I see what your saying but in this instance is testing warranted ? You imply someone could have had sex with me while I was sleeping as I may not hav woken up.....If you think I being crazy and shouldnt worry I will take your sound advice :)

Offline RapidRod

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Re: not sure about sex
« Reply #7 on: April 24, 2008, 07:31:24 PM »
You would have awaken if someone was having sex with you. I know I would.

Offline Matty the Damned

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Re: not sure about sex
« Reply #8 on: April 24, 2008, 07:31:30 PM »
I'm not implying anything. Listen carefully.

I think the scenario you outline is the silliest thing I've heard all week, I don't think anything happened whilst you were asleep that would lead you to need testing for HIV infection.

But what would I know? I wasn't there.

My original advice to you was:

. . . all sexually active adults should have a full STD screen at least once a year. Twice is better. A full screen will include but is not limited to an HIV antibody test. If it's been a while since your last full screen or if you've never had one before you should contact your doctor or local sexual health clinic.


I don't know how much clearer to make it. You're sexually active. I presume this isn't the first time you've had a sexual encounter, so I'm telling you have have a full sexual health checkup. It's entirely routine and what responsible people do.

Is that clear enough for you?

MtD

Offline canyouhelp

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  • Posts: 12
Re: not sure about sex
« Reply #9 on: April 24, 2008, 07:38:21 PM »
well the thing is I had a recent check up(in february) and was all clear hence my anxiety over this latest encounter so didnt want to have to test again so soon

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: not sure about sex
« Reply #10 on: April 24, 2008, 09:22:16 PM »
I think you're worrying needlessly. But you have to decide if this is going to niggle at you in which case get tested and collect the inevitable negative test result for HIV.
Andy Velez

Offline canyouhelp

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  • Posts: 12
Re: not sure about sex
« Reply #11 on: April 25, 2008, 03:41:24 AM »
Ok but does what I have outlined warrant testing.....I dont want to have to retest so soon if I havent had a risk you see,thats why Im asking if my story sounds plausible

Offline Ann

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  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: not sure about sex
« Reply #12 on: April 25, 2008, 07:14:10 AM »
can,

No, what you outlined does not warrant testing. However, as Andy said, if testing is the only way to ease your mind, then test. Just don't expect to be able to use this forum to wring your hands over your no risk event.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

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"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline canyouhelp

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Re: not sure about sex
« Reply #13 on: April 25, 2008, 03:35:13 PM »
whats wring your hands mean please

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: not sure about sex
« Reply #14 on: April 25, 2008, 03:44:20 PM »
It means coming here repeatedly after we have told you that you weren't at risk, testing is not necessary and they you come back asking if you should test.
Andy Velez

Offline canyouhelp

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  • Posts: 12
Re: not sure about sex
« Reply #15 on: April 25, 2008, 03:52:54 PM »
Ok dont want to go through a test again so soon so will take your advice and accept its a no risk event and move on......am I acting a little crazy

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: not sure about sex
« Reply #16 on: April 25, 2008, 06:06:07 PM »
Let's just say you're overworking this thing. Give it a rest and get on with your life.
Andy Velez

Offline canyouhelp

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  • Posts: 12
Re: not sure about sex
« Reply #17 on: April 26, 2008, 06:20:21 AM »
Ok thank you

I also recently wa with agirl who said she had recent surgery for crohns disease and related tumour,all we did was kiss and mutual masturbation ,I noticed scars but didnt notice any blood.Is any of this an HIV risk

Offline Matty the Damned

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Re: not sure about sex
« Reply #18 on: April 26, 2008, 06:23:31 AM »
No it's not a risk.

I refer you to the relevant section of our Welcome Thread:

Anyone who continues to post excessively, questioning a conclusive negative result or no-risk situation, will be subject to a four week Time Out (a temporary ban from the Forums). If you continue to post excessively after one Time Out, you may be given a second Time Out which will last eight weeks. There is no third Time Out - it is a permanent ban. The purpose of a Time Out is to encourage you to seek the face-to-face help we cannot provide on this forum.

MtD

Offline canyouhelp

  • Member
  • Posts: 12
Re: not sure about sex
« Reply #19 on: May 07, 2008, 09:04:14 AM »
I did a couple of home tests with Mirates test.Came back negative

Mirates is a Dutch company and got email from Dutch Health Inspectorate as my test came apart and m open wound touched it,wanted resassurance I could not get infected by test but to my astonushment I got this reply ,so maybe these tests are risky ??????:

Dear Madam/Sir,
 
As I wrote in my previous e-mail, it is highly unlikely that you get infected by a test. Mostly they use parts of the dead virus or antibodies which are a product of the immune system. However I am sorry to say that I cannot give you full reassurance, because this test does not comply with the European rules and we cannot assess how the test works or how and with what ingredients the test has been manufacturered.
 
I am not able to give you more information than this. Therefore, I urgently request you to visit a physician and have yourself retested with a test that does comply to the regulations, in order to take away your worries. Unfortunately, I am not able to do more for you than this. I can imagine that it is a big step to have yourself tested at a health care facility, but I think it is the best option in the current situation to get reassurance. Often you can be tested anonymously. I think it is better to know for sure then to keep worrying! So please take my advice and have yourself tested with a physician!
 
I wish you all the best!
 
Yours sincerely,
 
IGZ-Loket
Postbus 2680
3500 GR  UTRECHT
Tel.: 088-1205000
Fax.: 088-1205001


Offline Ann

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  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: not sure about sex
« Reply #20 on: May 07, 2008, 09:29:05 AM »
can,

It sounds to me like whoever wrote that email to you is playing with you and purposely trying to make you worry.

There is no way on earth you'd become infected from a test you purchased and performed at home. NO WAY. Hiv is a fragile virus that wouldn't be able to infect you after being out of the body for so long.

You never had a risk in the first place. You ARE hiv negative.

Keep posting about your original no risk concern or this test concern and you'll be timed out. Please consider yourself warned for the last time.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline canyouhelp

  • Member
  • Posts: 12
Re: not sure about sex
« Reply #21 on: May 07, 2008, 10:22:49 AM »
But that is from Dutch Health Inspectorate.

Has anyone else heard of Mirates?

Offline Ann

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  • Member
  • Posts: 27,947
  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: not sure about sex
« Reply #22 on: May 07, 2008, 10:43:46 AM »
can,

Yes, we've heard of Mirates. Why don't you use the search button and find the info yourself?

You are hiv negative. You do not have hiv. You didn't have a risk and your test result is valid. You are hiv negative.

Post again and you'll be timed out.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline canyouhelp

  • Member
  • Posts: 12
Re: not sure about sex
« Reply #23 on: May 07, 2008, 05:53:12 PM »
Ok sorry...do any of these tests contain real HIV anyway ,as you say it wouldnt infect having been out of the body for so long,so is there real HIV in the test in the first place

Offline Ann

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  • Member
  • Posts: 27,947
  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: not sure about sex
« Reply #24 on: May 07, 2008, 06:51:49 PM »
Can,

No, there is no hiv present in ANY of the hiv tests. I said what I said in anticipation of you coming back and saying "yeah but what if there were hiv in the tests". I was trying to head you off at the pass.

I'm giving you that time out I warned you about. Do not attempt to create a new account to get around your time out because if you do, you will be permanently banned.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

 


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