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Author Topic: Please help...  (Read 4832 times)

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Offline lilu3333

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Please help...
« on: April 11, 2008, 10:57:12 AM »
I have a story about 7 months length. I am from Europe and at SEP 2007 I had vocation in Turkey. I met a Turkish male and we had unprotected sex 4 times, 2 times protected sex. After I came back, I started to have health problems. - swollen lymphs, red neck, fever, white tounge, night sweats, rash on body - like from the book. That time I breastfeeded my two years old baby. After some time she started to have the same symptoms+geographic tongue, diareha. For all this time I have made ~20 HIV tests - Elisa 4th generation, one test for my baby too. After 7 months thanks Good, all negative, but symptoms still are present to both of as. We feel sick all the time. After six month I started to have sex with my boyfriend at home without condom, because everyman says I am clean. After 2 weeks he started the same symptoms,  Could Elisa test not catch some rare strains that are in Turkey and Egypt, because I know that he has lived in Egypt for a while. What could else it be???
Please help, I am so scared for my baby and boyfriend. please...

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: Please help...
« Reply #1 on: April 11, 2008, 03:54:16 PM »
As far as your original concern, you have more than reliably tested negative for HIV. So that is a closed case as a source of concern about HIV. The geography you are concerned about as a factor is irrelevant. Your negative test result related to that time of unprotected intercourse is reliable.

Now, you have been having unprotected sex again which is very unwise. The only time you can reliably dispense with using condoms everytime for intercourse is when 1) both partners have tested negative at a point 13 weeks after the most recent unprotected intercourse and 2) they are in a securely monogamous relationship. Otherwise any guy you are with, no matter what he says about his status, needs to be wearing a condom everytime you have either vaginal or anal intercourse. No exceptions and I don't care what the guy says.

I know it can be difficult to deal with the issue of demanding condoms, but think of it as a situation where you are literally putting your life at risk when you have unprotected intercourse.

As for the symptoms you are concerned about that's something to discuss with your doctor and the baby's pediatrician. It's not about HIV. Or at least not from that earlier incident.

But I do think you need to re-test at 13 weeks again now to confirm the earlier negative result.

Cheers,
Andy Velez

Offline lilu3333

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Re: Please help...
« Reply #2 on: April 12, 2008, 03:28:07 PM »

Thanks for answer.
We had monogamy relationships with my  boyfriend and father of my baby until I did this stupid mistake. I know he is clean, that is why I am so scared.

 

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: Please help...
« Reply #3 on: April 12, 2008, 03:53:58 PM »
Just because you were monogamous with your bf doesn't mean the same thing as testing negative together. If you two haven't done that then you should.

And please don't use the term "clean" when you are referring to HIV status. Someone is either HIV+ or HIV-. Using a term like "clean" implies HIV is something dirty and it's offensive to everyone living with the virus because it implies they are "dirty." You didn't mean to offend but you need to become more sensitive to this issue.  
Andy Velez

Offline lilu3333

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Re: Please help...
« Reply #4 on: April 12, 2008, 04:15:12 PM »
My English is not very good, that is why I try to say how it is easier, that doesn't mean I am not sensitive for this illness. Sorry if I have said something wrong.
I am grateful for everything You are doing here, thank You so much.
God bless You.

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: Please help...
« Reply #5 on: April 12, 2008, 04:43:35 PM »
OK. Understood. I knew you weren't intending to be offensive.

And you're welcome.
Andy Velez

Offline lilu3333

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Re: Please help...
« Reply #6 on: April 26, 2008, 12:13:10 PM »
It's me again. Please, please help me. I can not take it anymore. I am so scared about rare strains, that  can not be found by tests. My symptoms still are present and I tested HIV- again , thanks God. But I don't trust the test result, because I feel I have this thing. And my baby too. She had vomiting again and diharea, and running nose all the time and red neck, and this white geographic tongue is getting worse. I am so scared for her. I am such bad mother. Please, please help me. My baby is everything for my.
I made CD test.
CD4 - 780; 40%, is it bad?

Offline Ann

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Re: Please help...
« Reply #7 on: April 26, 2008, 12:20:21 PM »
Lilu,

Your CD4 numbers are fantastic - and they also support the fact that you are hiv negative.

Instead of continuing to test for hiv and CD4 counts, why don't you go to your doctor with your ailments? Whatever is causing them isn't hiv - go find out what IS causing them.

You do NOT have hiv! You ARE hiv negative!

Ann

edited for typo
« Last Edit: April 26, 2008, 12:23:36 PM by Ann »
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"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline lilu3333

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Re: Please help...
« Reply #8 on: April 26, 2008, 01:32:33 PM »
Thank You, Ann!
You all are very good people here.
I made my CD test at 12o'clock in the morning. I heard that in the morning CD levels are much higher than later. Is it true???
What do You think about rare strains and testing. I know that this guy has lived in Egypt and he has had a lot of sex partners.
I am very, very scared. I live in nightmare.
My babies doctor told that my baby has damaged immune system that is why she has geographic tongue. The worse think is - I know that it is my fault, I gave my breast to her after I came back from Turkey. And soon she started to have those symptoms - diahrea, vomiting, flu, red neck, fever......

What could else damage immune system if it is not HIV????? I cant believe in anything else:((((((((((((((((((((

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: Please help...
« Reply #9 on: April 26, 2008, 11:25:00 PM »
Lots of other things can be affecting your immune system. Just because the explanation has not been found doesn't mean your HIV negative results weren't accurate. You are HIV negative. Whatever is going on with you and/or your baby is something to sort out with your doctor(s). This is NOT an HIV situation.

 
Andy Velez

Offline lilu3333

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Re: Please help...
« Reply #10 on: April 27, 2008, 05:58:43 AM »
Thanks Andy and Ann!
I ll try to move on and look for other illness. Most important think is - my baby must be HIV-. I could not deal with it.
God bless You!

Lilu

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: Please help...
« Reply #11 on: April 27, 2008, 10:13:02 AM »
You're welcome. Good luck with getting the real cause of the symptoms properly diagnosed and treated.
Andy Velez

Offline lilu3333

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Re: Please help...
« Reply #12 on: April 28, 2008, 02:53:59 AM »
Its me again. I had such a terrible night - I was sweating, my baby was sweating also all the night. Our tongues looks very bad this morning. I want to trust the test results, but I read in this forum the sweating is the most common symptom for HIV. Is it true? And what about oral thrush?
Please one more answer.
I am so nervous, because next week I my baby has vaccination for encephalitis. And it could be dangerous if she has HIV.
Please help.
Lilu

Offline Ann

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Re: Please help...
« Reply #13 on: April 28, 2008, 04:18:42 AM »
lilu,

YOU DO NOT HAVE HIV!

Take yourself and your daughter to the doctor to find out what is really going on. You could be missing something really important while focusing on hiv, which YOU DO NOT HAVE!

ANY illness can cause sweating. Go find out what, if any, illness is causing yours. YOU DO NOT HAVE HIV!

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

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"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline lilu3333

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  • Posts: 12
Re: Please help...
« Reply #14 on: May 09, 2008, 02:21:39 AM »
Sorry, it s me again.
I have a new symptom - very dry skin all over my body and red pimps in my mouth. It's makes me nervous and sad again. On Monday I will go to doctor and will ask for test that is based on hiv itself, not antibodies. Because with such symptoms I can not believe that I am HIV-.
Wish me good luck, please.
Lilu

Offline Ann

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  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: Please help...
« Reply #15 on: May 09, 2008, 05:45:55 AM »
lil,

Once again, take your symptoms to the doctor. They have nothing to do with hiv. You have tested conclusively hiv negative. You do not have hiv.

You do not need PCR testing. It is NOT approved for diagnostic purposes because it has a high rate of FALSE positives. You don't want that!

You don't need further testing at all, but if you insist on testing, a standard antibody test will suffice.

You do not have hiv. You If you've read the Welcome Thread like you're supposed to, you will have read the following:

Quote
Anyone who continues to post excessively, questioning a conclusive negative result or no-risk situation, will be subject to a four week Time Out (a temporary ban from the Forums). If you continue to post excessively after one Time Out, you may be given a second Time Out which will last eight weeks. There is no third Time Out - it is a permanent ban. The purpose of a Time Out is to encourage you to seek the face-to-face help we cannot provide on this forum.

Please consider yourself warned.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline lilu3333

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  • Posts: 12
Re: Please help...
« Reply #16 on: June 01, 2008, 02:56:58 PM »
Hello Ann, Andy, all of You!
It's me again!
I have just one question. Can HIV be transmitted by salvia or kissing?
Just my babies best friend (allsou 3 years old now) became ill with red neck, nausea, cough, swollen limphs.  They are shearing toys, bottles....
Just say that Hiv couldn't be transmitted that way.
Thank You!
I just fighting with my fears, I made EBV test, my Ig g was 50. I go to doctor next week and hope that we have EBV.
Please help me again, I understand that I have been warned, but there is involved another baby. Please, could it be EBV?

Offline RapidRod

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Re: Please help...
« Reply #17 on: June 01, 2008, 03:02:41 PM »
No, HIV cannot be transmitted via saliva and kissing.

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: Please help...
« Reply #18 on: June 01, 2008, 04:29:36 PM »
No risk as Rod has told you.

You're a Mom. HIV is going to be with us for a longtime to come and your child is going to have to learn about it. Which means it's time you became better educated and saner about HIV. About the real risks. Read our lesson on transmission. HIV is a fragile virus and not easy to transmit. You need to know the real risks which are very few. There's a link to the Transmission lesson in the welcome thread which opens this section.

You need to know more so that as your child grows  up you can provide information and not pass on your HIV hysteria. No kidding. I'm giving it to you straight because this is important.

Andy Velez

Offline lilu3333

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  • Posts: 12
Re: Please help...
« Reply #19 on: July 09, 2008, 12:43:10 PM »
Hello, it's me again!
I know You said I don't have HIV, but it is still hard to believe in that. I have visited so many doctors, I have made so many tests for different illnesses, for my baby also, but have now answers. Nobody can say anything what is wrong with me. All this time 11 months now I have this sore throat, dry mouth and white tongue. I hurt my fingers very much. And this horrible sweating at nights. I have no explanation for this. My baby also has all the symptoms + she has styes all the time. And my husband also. I am so afraid, I live in nightmare. My CD4 count dropped from 40% to 38% in 2 months.
I am so afraid that Axsym abbott combo test can not find some rare starin (N or O), because I know this man has lived in Egypt.
Please, please, don't angry, I am so sad, feel guilty and desperate. Help me.

Offline Ann

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    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: Please help...
« Reply #20 on: July 09, 2008, 01:56:57 PM »
lilu,

Damn, I wish I had a high CD4 count like you do. But then again, I'm hiv positive AND YOU ARE NOT. 

We cannot help you. All we can do is tell you that you do NOT have hiv. If you did, you would test positive.

If you cannot get past this, please seek counseling. There's a good chance your "symptoms" are being created by the anxiety you are experiencing.

You do not have hiv.

We will not allow you to use this forum to continue to question your conclusive negative results. Read the Welcome thread and please, consider yourself warned.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline lilu3333

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  • Posts: 12
Re: Please help...
« Reply #21 on: July 18, 2008, 11:19:09 AM »
This is my last post here. I just wanned to say thank You for support.
There is one think that I don't understand - how can I trust 100% in my and my babies test, if there is written that negative test doesn't mean that you are negative (in some axsym info page). If they say, that those test are not 100% reliable, then haw can I trust my results with such symptoms.
You said that You will not allow to come with my fears in this forum and I will not do that again, but I and my doctor have no explanation for such symptoms in my family, even he thinks that I do have HIV. My husband has a dry cough for 3 months now after he has all the ARS symptoms...And You say I don't have it. Then what is it???
One think is for sure - I have a very huge lesson about cheating, I will never do that again.
Thank all of You for everything.
Lilu

Offline Ann

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Re: Please help...
« Reply #22 on: July 18, 2008, 12:24:55 PM »
lil,

but I and my doctor have no explanation for such symptoms in my family, even he thinks that I do have HIV.

Maybe it's time you got a second opinion.

You tested hiv negative far outside the window period. You do not have hiv.

You DO need to see a doctor who will properly investigate your problem instead of ordering more hiv tests.

We cannot diagnose you, but we can say you don't have hiv, based on your test results. There's nothing more we can do for you here.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline lilu3333

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Re: Please help...
« Reply #23 on: August 29, 2008, 01:28:23 PM »
Hello.
I just have one question.
I made CD4 count to my daughter. The CD4 count is very good 1200, but there are very high activated t cell count - 600 (normal range is 90-250). I read that such high activated t cell count is in HIV infected people.
And lymphocyte count was only 21% (in children normal is ~40 - 50%).
I know I have made a lot of hiv tests, but why is so bad test results for my baby?

Offline Ann

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Re: Please help...
« Reply #24 on: August 29, 2008, 03:40:12 PM »
lilu,

Why don't you ask a doctor? All we can tell you is that based on your conclusively hiv negative test results, neither you nor your baby have hiv. We cannot interpret your blood counts for you. We WON'T interpret your blood counts for you.

You've already been warned about posting repeatedly over your conclusively hiv negative status. I'm giving you that time out I've warned you about. Use this time to see a doctor and/or get a second opinion over whatever it is that may or may not be going on. Whatever it is, it isn't hiv.

Do not attempt to create a new account to get around your time out because if you do, you will be permanently banned.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

 


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