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Author Topic: fingering with possible cuts  (Read 2623 times)

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Offline sushi76

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  • Posts: 11
fingering with possible cuts
« on: March 17, 2008, 08:45:22 AM »
i had an encounter with a csw about 4 weeks ago.  no sex, i just fingered her with a small cut on my finger. she refused to get tested.  she wanted to have weekly encounters.  when i pressed the issue of getting tested, i never heard from her again. about 10 days later i came down with fever for about 10 days with no other symptoms.  i am really scared.  the fever went away about a week ago, but this anxiety has wreaked havic on the rest of my life since then.  it is 4 weeks post and i think i want to test again.  i realize that 4 weeks is not conclusive, but most people will show at 4 weeks.  i realize that my exposure was low risk, but i am married and all i keep thinking about day in and day out is losing my son.. please help  :(

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: fingering with possible cuts
« Reply #1 on: March 17, 2008, 10:02:35 AM »
You are worrying needlessly. Fingering with cuts, nicks, bruises and anything else you can throw into the scarifying mix does not represent a risk of any kind for HIV transmission. There's never been an infection in that manner and you're not going to be the first. There's no need for testing but I do urge you to read our lesson on transmission. There's a link to it in the Welcome thread which opens this section.

My guess is this level of anxiety on your part is about guilt for having strayed. You're a dawg like a lot of us. Take a breath, let it go and get on with your life. Really. This is not an HIV situation. Period.
Andy Velez

Offline sushi76

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Re: fingering with possible cuts
« Reply #2 on: March 17, 2008, 10:24:45 AM »
Andy,
thanks for your input.. i realize the risk is minimal, but i can't help my fears.  these symptoms,which i know are not indicative of hiv have been causing me worry for the past 4 weeks..  would you agree that a 4 week negative antibody blood test is pretty reliable?  it also state on this site that a cut could theoretically transmit hive through vaginal secretions but there hasn't beena documented case that way.  what are your thought on that?

Offline RapidRod

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Re: fingering with possible cuts
« Reply #3 on: March 17, 2008, 12:40:35 PM »
4 weeks is to early to take an HIV test. Plus it's a waste of money to take one that early.

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: fingering with possible cuts
« Reply #4 on: March 17, 2008, 01:35:27 PM »
Theoretical means it "could" happen. And anytime you have sex with someone else theoretically transmission could occur. But in the real world of HIV we know transmission doesn't happen in the manner you are concerned about.

The average time to seroconversion is 22 days. All but the smallest number will seroconvert within 4-6 weeks after an exposure to the virus. So  6 weeks is the earliest to do a test. In your case I don't see testing to even be necessary. And testing at 13 weeks is what to do when there has been a genuine risk, which you did not have.
Andy Velez

Offline sushi76

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Re: fingering with possible cuts
« Reply #5 on: March 17, 2008, 02:04:10 PM »
i did test today at 28 days.  i had the oraquick blood test which came back negative... i do realize that this is still a little early, but it helped calm my fears a little bit.

Offline sushi76

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  • Posts: 11
Re: fingering with possible cuts
« Reply #6 on: March 17, 2008, 02:08:36 PM »
Andy,

do you think that the 4 week result could be accurate if the symptoms I had were about 9 days after my exposure?  Do you think I would show up positive on the orakquick test by now?  I realize that 6-8 weeks is when I should have retested, but the anxiey is killing me

Offline sushi76

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  • Posts: 11
Re: fingering with possible cuts
« Reply #7 on: March 17, 2008, 03:19:01 PM »
I forgot to ask, is it ok to have sex with my wife at this point?

Offline Matty the Damned

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Re: fingering with possible cuts
« Reply #8 on: March 17, 2008, 03:21:37 PM »
You don't have HIV so, yes you can have unprotected sex with your wife without fear of infecting her.

MtD

Offline sushi76

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Re: fingering with possible cuts
« Reply #9 on: March 17, 2008, 03:27:22 PM »
Matty,
do you think that the 4 week test is conclusive based on my exposure?

Offline Matty the Damned

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Re: fingering with possible cuts
« Reply #10 on: March 17, 2008, 03:29:07 PM »
Yes, your 4 week test is conclusive because you were not at risk of HIV infection in the first place.

MtD

Offline sushi76

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  • Posts: 11
Re: fingering with possible cuts
« Reply #11 on: March 17, 2008, 03:49:37 PM »
thank you for your input.  i really appreciate your quick responses to my anxiety provoked questions...  :)

Offline sushi76

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  • Posts: 11
Re: fingering with possible cuts
« Reply #12 on: March 18, 2008, 09:58:00 AM »
ANN-
Can you please comment on my post?   Please.....

Offline Ann

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  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: fingering with possible cuts
« Reply #13 on: March 18, 2008, 10:03:48 AM »
Sush,

There's nothing new to add to what you've already been told.

You didn't have a risk.

You are conclusively hiv negative.

It's time you moved on with your life, remembering to use condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, every time, no exceptions. Read through all three condom and lube links in my signature line so you can use them with confidence.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline sushi76

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  • Posts: 11
Re: fingering with possible cuts
« Reply #14 on: March 18, 2008, 10:15:52 AM »
Ann,
thanks for your support.. one last question please and i'll put this to rest.  why is there no risk if secretions enter a cut on the finger?  this site says that there is a theoretical risk.  could you please explain the difference to me.  I really freaked ou twhen this woman refused to get tested and I never heard from her again.  I would think people would want to know their status. to have symptoms after 10 days such as low grade fever lasting for 10 days and no other issues really scared the heck out of me.

Offline Morgan

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  • You did WHAT??
Re: fingering with possible cuts
« Reply #15 on: March 18, 2008, 03:19:07 PM »
Sushi,

It is theoretically possible that when you step out of your house, you will be struck dead by a meteor.  In practice, this just doesn't happen.  As Andy said, of the millions of people who have had similar encounters, not one has been documented to have been infected.

And symptoms mean nothing when it comes to hiv infection.  You can have some, none, or all of the symptoms typically associated with primary hiv infection, and be positive or negative. That is why the only way to definitively determine your hiv status is through testing at the appropriate time.

As you had no risk to begin with, testing is not warranted for the incident you describe.

Morgan
Morgan Landers

Offline sushi76

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  • Posts: 11
Re: fingering with possible cuts
« Reply #16 on: March 19, 2008, 09:33:04 AM »
Morgan,
thanks for your reply.   the whole situation was inappropriate and when I truly got scared because she wouldn't test and I never was able to reach her again, you can understand where my anxiety took the best of me..   Unfortunately, the timing of my low grade fever for 10 days provoked more fear.  I plan to test in another 2-3 weeks.

Offline Morgan

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  • You did WHAT??
Re: fingering with possible cuts
« Reply #17 on: March 19, 2008, 10:18:07 AM »
Sushi,

The fact that she didn't have the same level of comfort discussing STI's and testing as you, should have no bearing on your responsibility to your own sexual health and hiv status.

Your symptoms, as such, mean nothing where hiv is concerned (see prior post), and should not be considered in determining your risk for hiv infection.

Just because someone is uncomfortable addressing these matters does not mean there is cause for concern.  And your anxiety, while understandable, does not extend weight to, or validate, your irrational fear in the absence of "at risk" behavior.

Sushi, nothing you describe warrants a first test, much less, a followup.  And no matter how she reacts to being confonted or questioned about HER hiv status affects the situation or mitigates YOUR hiv status.

Nothing you engaged in put you at risk for hiv infection.  Stop trying to find a reason to keep your fear alive.

Tough love, but love all the same.

Morgan
Morgan Landers

Offline sushi76

  • Member
  • Posts: 11
Re: fingering with possible cuts
« Reply #18 on: March 19, 2008, 11:17:57 AM »
Morgan,
Thank you for your support.. I will put this matter to rest.. :) :)

 


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