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Author Topic: RIP - Scatty, my cat  (Read 3024 times)

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Offline gemini20

  • Member
  • Posts: 262
RIP - Scatty, my cat
« on: February 21, 2008, 04:23:24 PM »
Today I had to make one of the hardest decisions in my life in recent times and have Scatty, my cat, put to sleep.  :(

He had been having breathing problems for a while but was still eating normally, playing and using the litter tray as regularly as clockwork so I was not unduly concerned. But at the start of the week I noticed a change in him and from Tuesday evening through to today he had not eaten anything and his breathing seemed more of a struggle.

I took him to the vets this afternoon and he confirmed my worst fears when he said Scatty was experiencing congestive heart failure and his abdomen was filling with fluid and his heart was struggling to work. I knew then what I had to do but it's got to be one of the saddest moments of my life.

Scatty has been my constant companion for the last 14 years and was so much more than just a pet. He gave me a reason to keep on fighting this stupid fucking virus because amongst other things on the few times I considered ending it all it was his miaows that brought me back to my senses.

I always expected to die before him and not have to face this loss but now I'm going through a pain and grief which I haven't felt since Ian died.

I know that life goes on and I will get through this very emotional episode but fuck does it hurt at the moment. My home already feels empty without him and I can't imagine how I will fill that void.

I know there are many on the forums who have lost pets and will understand what I'm going through.

I just hope the stress and sadness doesn't compromise my own health too much.

A very sad Emma  :(
Diagnosed 11th September 1991
Current CD4 count 484 (26%); viral load undetectable (December 2011).
Restarting boosted Prezista 08/04/11

Offline minismom

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Re: RIP - Scatty, my cat
« Reply #1 on: February 21, 2008, 04:32:03 PM »
I'm so sorry for your loss.  My parents ended up putting down their beloved lab the day after Christmas.  There was no one there to "take care" of CoCo when it was done, so my dad packed her up and brought her home.  He burried her near the barn where she'd play in the creek.  It made for a very sad season. 

Mum
www.watoto.com
www.MotherBearProject.org
"Whichever way you throw me, i will stand"
"Don't worry about the world coming to an end today...it's already tomorrow in Australia"  Charles Schultz

Offline Miss Philicia

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Re: RIP - Scatty, my cat
« Reply #2 on: February 21, 2008, 04:33:57 PM »
Sorry to hear of this, Emma.  I lost a dear cat about 4 years ago and know how mentally challenging such experiences are.
"Iíve slept with enough men to know that Iím not gay"

Offline Ann

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    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: RIP - Scatty, my cat
« Reply #3 on: February 21, 2008, 04:50:49 PM »
Sorry for your loss, Emma. I lost my bestest-ever catfriend in 2003 and I still miss him dearly.

Hugs,
Ann
xxx
Condoms are a girl's best friend

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"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline Mouse

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  • Om nom nom.
Re: RIP - Scatty, my cat
« Reply #4 on: February 21, 2008, 04:53:45 PM »
I'm sorry, Emma. If anyone would ever understand I certainly do. It won't ever hurt any less but it will get easier to cope with. I promise.

I always tell myself that no matter how much it hurts I was better for having them in my life at all.

Offline Teresa

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Re: RIP - Scatty, my cat
« Reply #5 on: February 21, 2008, 06:16:37 PM »
Emma, So sorry for the loss of your beloved cat. I know how painful it is to lose a pet. Scatty knew how much you loved him and he had a good life thanks to you.

Big Hugs
Teresa
Hubby HIV+ 5/5/06
CD4:320
  %: 26.7
 VL: <20
Atripla (started it 8/24/06)
 

Offline BT65

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Re: RIP - Scatty, my cat
« Reply #6 on: February 21, 2008, 06:58:19 PM »
Emma, I am so sorry for your loss.  I've had to have a couple cats put down myself.  It was devastating.  I agree with Mouse, though; the agony does lessen.  And I never regretted having them in my life.  I rescued a cat from a local shelter a couple years ago and she's been amazing. 

I know you'll get through this.  Here's a big {{{HUG}}}.
I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

Offline Buckmark

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Re: RIP - Scatty, my cat
« Reply #7 on: February 21, 2008, 07:02:14 PM »
Emma,

I'm sorry to hear about Scatty.  My pets have been some of my most loyal and closest companions, so I can imagine how painful this is for you.  I'm sure you were a great companion to Scatty, too.

Love,

Henry
"Life in Lubbock, Texas, taught me two things:
     One is that God loves you and you're going to burn in hell.
     The other is that sex is the most awful, filthy thing on earth and you should save it for someone you love."
- Butch Hancock, Musician, The Flatlanders

Offline MOONLIGHT1114

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  • Cheech 2.2.94 - 4.23.10 We miss you so much!
Re: RIP - Scatty, my cat
« Reply #8 on: February 21, 2008, 07:09:27 PM »
Hi Emma~

I am so sorry to hear of Scatty's passing.  I know how important our little friends can be to us.  In 2007 I had to put one of my dogs to sleep and had never gone through this before.  The vet gave me this poem and it has helped me tremendously ever since.  Just picture Scatty waiting for you, and don't worry, he's OK and out of pain.

~ Cindy


RAINBOW BRIDGE
Just this side of heaven is a place called Rainbow Bridge.

When an animal dies that has been especially close to someone here, that pet goes to Rainbow Bridge.
There are meadows and hills for all of our special friends so they can run and play together.
There is plenty of food, water and sunshine, and our friends are warm and comfortable.

All the animals who had been ill and old are restored to health and vigor; those who were hurt or maimed are made whole and strong again, just as we remember them in our dreams of days and times gone by.
The animals are happy and content, except for one small thing; they each miss someone very special to them, who had to be left behind.

They all run and play together, but the day comes when one suddenly stops and looks into the distance. His bright eyes are intent; His eager body quivers. Suddenly he begins to run from the group, flying over the green grass, his legs carrying him faster and faster.

You have been spotted, and when you and your special friend finally meet, you cling together in joyous reunion, never to be parted again. The happy kisses rain upon your face; your hands again caress the beloved head, and you look once more into the trusting eyes of your pet, so long gone from your life but never absent from your heart.

Then you cross Rainbow Bridge together....


Author unknown...

http://www.petloss.com/poems/maingrp/rainbowb.htm

HIV+ since '93, 1/12 - CD4 785 and undet.   WOO-HOO!!

Offline Basquo

  • Member
  • Posts: 3,254
Re: RIP - Scatty, my cat
« Reply #9 on: February 21, 2008, 07:59:29 PM »
I'm so sorry to hear of your loss. Scatty's been welcomed by Sasha, Cora, and the other scores of pets everyone here has loved.  The Rainbow Bridge is the designated meeting place.

Offline David_CA

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  • Posts: 3,246
  • Joined: March 2006
Re: RIP - Scatty, my cat
« Reply #10 on: February 21, 2008, 08:28:00 PM »
Emma,

I'm so sorry about your cat.  I swear, to those of us without children, our pets are our kids.  I've gone through it several times with my cats (but fortunately not recently), and it sure doesn't get any easier.  Hugs to you.

David
Black Friday 03-03-2006
03-23-06 CD4 359 @27.4% VL 75,938
06-01-06 CD4 462 @24.3% VL > 100,000
08-15-06 CD4 388 @22.8% VL >  "
10-21-06 CD4 285 @21.9% VL >  "
  Atripla started 12-01-2006
01-08-07 CD4 429 @26.8% VL 1872!
05-08-07 CD4 478 @28.1% VL 740
08-03-07 CD4 509 @31.8% VL 370
11-06-07 CD4 570 @30.0% VL 140
02-21-08 CD4 648 @32.4% VL 600
05-19-08 CD4 695 @33.1% VL < 48 undetectable!
08-21-08 CD4 725 @34.5%
11-11-08 CD4 672 @39.5%
02-11-09 CD4 773 @36.8%
05-11-09 CD4 615 @36.2%
08-19-09 CD4 770 @38.5%
11-19-09 CD4 944 @33.7%
02-17-10 CD4 678 @39.9%  
06-03-10 CD4 768 @34.9%
09-21-10 CD4 685 @40.3%
01-10-11 CD4 908 @36.3%
05-23-11 CD4 846 @36.8% VL 80
02-13-12 CD4 911 @41.4% VL<20
You must be the change you want to see in the world.  Mahatma Gandhi

Offline anniebc

  • Member
  • Posts: 5,939
  • AM member since 2003
Re: RIP - Scatty, my cat
« Reply #11 on: February 21, 2008, 08:54:15 PM »
{{{{HUGS}}}} to you Emma, I know only too well how painful it is to lose a beloved pet.

R.I.P Scatty.

Hugs
Jan :'(
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
Never knock on deaths door..ring the bell and run..he really hates that.

Offline BlueMoon

  • Member
  • Posts: 665
  • Calling from the Fun House
Re: RIP - Scatty, my cat
« Reply #12 on: February 21, 2008, 10:31:00 PM »
This made me sad.  I understand, as I have lost a couple of dogs, and now have a cat that is getting on in years.

Maybe you can get out and visit friends who have pets.  That helped me.
...................VL.....CD4.....%
-----------------------------------------
08/10-- ......<40.....290.....42
05/10-- ......<48.....290.....46
02/10-- ......<48.....481.....44
10/09-- ......<48.....277.....46
07/09-- ......<48.....300.....38
05/09-- ........51.....449.....39
03/09-- Added Isentress
02/09-- ........65.....299.....34
11/08-- ........62.....242.....40
08/08-- ........66.....212.....29
05/08-- ......202.....217.....27
03/08-- ....5210.....187.....21
02/08-- Began Truvada/Reyataz/Norvir
12/07-- 273,000.....157.....22
11/07-- 229,000.....209.....22
10/07-- Diagnosis

It's a complex world.

Offline Robert

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  • Posts: 2,644
Re: RIP - Scatty, my cat
« Reply #13 on: February 22, 2008, 01:05:41 AM »
My dear Emma

YOur sorrow hurts us all. I know your heart is broken but think of 'ol' Scat my cat' and you'll find the strength to go on.  Our animals not only help us get through this virus, they're a valuable part of our lives.  Scatty will always be a part of your life.  And you are a part of our lives.

robert
..........

Offline VM-Bass

  • Member
  • Posts: 38
Re: RIP - Scatty, my cat
« Reply #14 on: February 22, 2008, 01:53:11 AM »
I'm so sorry to hear about your cat.  I will never forget any of the animals I've ever had in my life, but the ones I've had to put down are the worst. 

I know I wouldn't be as happy without my beloved kitty Tallulah. 

Thanks for that poem Cindy...that's lovely. 

{{{HUGS}}}
1/11/08                  4/14/08         6/12/08

CD4: 927                    838               883
CD4%: 42                    40                 47
Viral Load: 2170           926               173

The friends thou hast, and their adoption tried, grapple them to thy soul with hoops of steel...
---Shakespeare

Offline bear60

  • Member
  • Posts: 4,104
Re: RIP - Scatty, my cat
« Reply #15 on: February 22, 2008, 11:11:20 AM »
Dear Emma.....
My condolences on the death of your cat.  David said it right when he equated our dear pets with our family / children.  It hurts when one of them leaves us.
joel aka bear
Poz Bear Type in Philadelphia

Offline AlanBama

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Re: RIP - Scatty, my cat
« Reply #16 on: February 22, 2008, 11:55:42 AM »
Dear Emma,

So sorry for your loss, honey.

RIP Scatty

love,

Alan
"Remember my sentimental friend that a heart is not judged by how much you love, but by how much you are loved by others." - The Wizard of Oz

Offline Iggy

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  • Posts: 2,435
Re: RIP - Scatty, my cat
« Reply #17 on: February 22, 2008, 12:38:05 PM »
Emma,

I'm very sorry to read this and can appreciate what you are feeling right now.

Mark

Offline gemini20

  • Member
  • Posts: 262
Re: RIP - Scatty, my cat
« Reply #18 on: February 22, 2008, 06:19:34 PM »
Thank you to everyone for your kind words at this difficult time for me.  It definitely helps to know that others understand what this loss means to me.

Thank you Cindy for the poem it meant a great deal as rainbows are my symbol for connecting to the spirit world and so it seemed very fitting to read that yesterday.

I swear, to those of us without children, our pets are our kids. 

This is so true for Scatty as I rescued him from an animal shelter only a couple of weeks after I ended a pregnancy and so he has always been the substitute for the child I never had.

Because he was an indoor cat he has been the constant presence in my life for the last 14 years. The hardest part of today was coming back home after visiting a couple of schools and knowing that he wouldn't be behind the door to greet me.

The only silver lining from this trauma is that I can now consider travelling away from home for more than a couple of nights which is something I've not done since 2003.

So I'll be planning another Australia/New Zealand trip again in May if my health holds steady.


Emma (ever so slightly less sad than yesterday)






Diagnosed 11th September 1991
Current CD4 count 484 (26%); viral load undetectable (December 2011).
Restarting boosted Prezista 08/04/11

Offline Jeffreyj

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  • Posts: 1,403
Re: RIP - Scatty, my cat
« Reply #19 on: February 23, 2008, 01:37:03 AM »
Emma,
I am so sorry for your loss. These thing are never easy. I have not had a pet since my dogie dies of cancer many years ago. I still dream about her! SO I'm sure Scatty will be part of your heart for ever!
Love You !
Positive since 1985

Offline lucas clay

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Re: RIP - Scatty, my cat
« Reply #20 on: February 23, 2008, 06:46:25 AM »
 I will say it again, there not pets but" family members."
My condolences at this very hard time.
I'm praying for you hon.

                                              Lucas

Offline sharkdiver

  • Member
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Re: RIP - Scatty, my cat
« Reply #21 on: February 23, 2008, 08:55:30 PM »
Hi Emma

I am so sorry to hear the news.

Sharkie

Offline poz1970

  • Member
  • Posts: 480
Re: RIP - Scatty, my cat
« Reply #22 on: February 24, 2008, 09:06:35 AM »
Hi Emma,

My heart goes out to you with losing your pet partner, I don't envy what you're going through in the slightest, because I know I don't think I'd be able to function when my little baby leaves me (18 years old this year, I think)

Anything we say here to sympathize cannot ever truly express the sorrow and pain of losing a piece of your heart.


J.
Who loves his cat to pieces, even when she's annoying and meowing for food at 6am :P
"The Bible contains 6 admonishments to homosexuals and 362 admonishments to  heterosexuals. That doesn`t mean that God doesn`t love heterosexuals. It`s just that they need more supervision." -- Lynn Lavne

Offline ademas

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Re: RIP - Scatty, my cat
« Reply #23 on: February 24, 2008, 09:25:54 AM »
I'm so sorry to hear of your loss, Emma.
I've gone through it a few times, too, and it's a heartbreak like no other.
Love and good thoughts in your direction.

 


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