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Author Topic: Should I disclose to my job?  (Read 1438 times)

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Offline Afraid

  • Member
  • Posts: 39
Should I disclose to my job?
« on: February 19, 2008, 08:48:28 PM »
I was just wondering if there is anyone on here, that could give me advice on how I should handle my current situation with my job. I currently work for a health insurance company, and I have missed a substantial amount of days, however I have been approved for Short Term Disability. I am afraid of losing my job, because of all the days that I have missed, so I was thinking maybe if I let my job know what's going on with me,( meaning telling them my status) then maybe they will have a better understanding, and not think that I am taking my job for granted..Any advice would be helpful..Thank you

Offline AlanBama

  • Member
  • Posts: 3,613
  • Alabama: the 'other' 3rd World Country!
Re: Should I disclose to my job?
« Reply #1 on: February 19, 2008, 09:30:56 PM »
Disclosure in the workplace is a tricky subject.    I'm glad you're seeking advice before disclosing.....I'd say it's best to get some different opinions, or examples.

What has caused you to miss so many days and require Short Term Disability?  An O.I. or AIDS-defining illness?  Or just general malaise, depression, etc.?

Also, maybe if you could give us a little more information, such as how much you have missed, have you actually received a verbal or written warning or reprimand, that kind of thing....

Right off the top of my head, with the little bit of info. you have given so far, I would say don't disclose your status at this point; you've been granted the STD, so they know you're genuinely ill.   Let that speak for itself.

Best of luck, and hopefully others will share some opinions and disclosure experiences.

Alan
"Remember my sentimental friend that a heart is not judged by how much you love, but by how much you are loved by others." - The Wizard of Oz

Offline Afraid

  • Member
  • Posts: 39
Re: Should I disclose to my job?
« Reply #2 on: February 19, 2008, 09:37:54 PM »
Well, I have missed 3 months of work, and when I returned back to work, I was put on a written warning. However I had a seizure at work,  the ambulance came to take me to the hosptal...and I havent been back since. I just found out that I suffer from epilepsy..I also suffer from deppression. I am just at the point that I want to protect my job, and I know that my supervisor doesn't care for me.

When I am at work I give 100%. It's just that I have been dealing with different things when it comes to this disease, and I am trying my best to not let it defeat me.
But it's like no matter how hard I try, it's starting to win anyway. I just figured that maybe if they knew the severity of my situation, that they would be more understanding.

Offline AlanBama

  • Member
  • Posts: 3,613
  • Alabama: the 'other' 3rd World Country!
Re: Should I disclose to my job?
« Reply #3 on: February 19, 2008, 09:53:07 PM »
OK, thanks for further clarification.....sorry you have had seizures, and especially one at work.   I know that was a scary situation.   Thank God I have never taken seriously ill while at work, as to having call an ambulance or that type of thing.

My (jaded) experience has been that on the surface, they may SEEM to be more caring/compassionate if you disclose, but in the end, it doesn't matter it's all about the job, and whether or not the particular boss has a like or dislike for you.

I disclosed in 1991, but it was a HAVE TO situation......I had lost 30 lbs and been in the hospital, and very distinctly appeared to be a person who had AIDS.   At first, they were very compassionate (you recall it was an undeniable death sentence at that point in time) but after a few years of struggling to maintain my job, my boss lost her compassion and showed me the other side of her face (actually both sides were pretty ugly).   I'd be lying if I said it did not give me some pleasure to know that I had outlived her, she died a couple of years ago and a friend sent me her obituary.

I think them knowing that you are epileptic and seized while at work is enough to garner compassion/understanding, without going into the HIV thing, but if you think it genuinely might help (and you know your situation better than anyone else can) then maybe it would help.   It's hard to say.

In any case, I wish you the best of luck with it, and hope you are able to hang onto your job/insurance benefits.   We all know how important that is.

Hugs,
Alan
"Remember my sentimental friend that a heart is not judged by how much you love, but by how much you are loved by others." - The Wizard of Oz

Offline Snowangel

  • Member
  • Posts: 1,413
Re: Should I disclose to my job?
« Reply #4 on: February 19, 2008, 10:04:49 PM »
I just figured that maybe if they knew the severity of my situation, that they would be more understanding.

You would hope this to be true but don't count on it. I have never disclosed to a job before but I used to work closely with my HR person who would have dealt with this sort of thing and to me it seemed like she let her personal views or whatever get in the way of her professional decisions.  By law you would be covered but we all know they have ways to make things worse all around.  This person used to spray her office with Lysol everytime she thought someone she just interviewed or spoke with was "unclean"  That is the big thing that scares me about disclosing is that you don't know what that persons knowledge base is and if they are willing to learn.

It sounds like you have a lot on your plate right now and have enough to think about.  If they have already granted you the STD, use it and don't give anymore information than you have to.  If you give a 100% when you are there and your supervisor has a problem with you, it is his/her problem ,not yours.   Make sure you keep everything dated and documented so if they do give you problems in the long run you can worry about it then.  Try not to get stressed out, and I know it is very hard not to, but for your health and wellness -TRY. I wish you the best.  I hope that you can get everything worked out.  Take care, Snow.
Of all the things you wear, your expression is the most important

The heaviest thing you can carry is a grudge..

One thing you can give and still keep...is your word.

One thing you can't recycle is wasted time.

Offline Jacques

  • Member
  • Posts: 171
Re: Should I disclose to my job?
« Reply #5 on: February 19, 2008, 11:39:50 PM »
Quote
I just figured that maybe if they knew the severity of my situation, that they would be more understanding
.

Hi Afraid,

I believe that epilepsy is severe enough to get compassion but I am not sure that discosing Hiv would get you as much. You won't be judged for having epilepsy, so, if I was in your situation, I'd rather play the epilepsy card than the hiv one.

regards
Jacques
Jacques
Living positively since 1987
latest lab :july 2010
Undetectable Cd4 1080
43% on Reyataz/Norvir/Truvada

Offline jabez

  • Member
  • Posts: 97
Re: Should I disclose to my job?
« Reply #6 on: February 20, 2008, 01:48:06 AM »
I believe I would tell them "I'm having complication from epilepsy", and I would keep the rest of my diagnosis to myself.  As Jacques noted, epilepsy tends to elicit understanding from employers --- AIDS, unfortunately, doesn't always work that way. 
Sept 2007 -- CD4 = 68; VL = 469,000
Started Atripla Sept 21, 2007
Nov 2007-CD4=217;VL=332
Feb 2008-CD4=237;VL=<50
Apr 2008-CD4=271;VL=66
Aug 2008-CD4=440;VL=52
Jan 2009-CD4=403;VL=61
May 2009-CD4=480;VL=129
Sep 2009-CD4=376;VL<40
Jan 2010-CD4=476;VL<40
Jul 2010-CD4=539;VL<40
Jan 2011-CD4=461;VL=53
Jul 2011-CD4=515;VL<20
Jan 2012-CD4=506;VL=54
Aug 2012-CD4=440;VL=21
Jan 2013-CD4=447;VL=<20
Jul 2013-CD4=406; VL=<20
Feb 2014-CD4=450; VL=<20
Aug 2014-CD4=535; VL=<20

Offline Winiroo

  • Member
  • Posts: 2,082
  • Positive since 1991
Re: Should I disclose to my job?
« Reply #7 on: February 20, 2008, 11:48:44 AM »
.

Hi Afraid,

I believe that epilepsy is severe enough to get compassion but I am not sure that discosing Hiv would get you as much. You won't be judged for having epilepsy, so, if I was in your situation, I'd rather play the epilepsy card than the hiv one.

regards
Jacques

I agree with Jacques.

 


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