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Author Topic: risky oral?  (Read 5143 times)

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Offline inneedofhelp

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risky oral?
« on: July 15, 2006, 07:49:23 PM »
Good-Evening everyone, well I had what I think is a pretty risky encounter a week ago. It started with deep kissing and mutual masterbation but led to about 1-2 mins of unprotected oral sex. I know that oral sex even unprotected is very low risk however after the oral sex I went to the bathroom and saw that I had some rough patches on my penis, probably from rough masterbation. I also had what looked like could have been some small open sores from the ordeal. How likely is it that these small open sores would transmit hiv to me thru oral sex, I'm very worried and know I need to test. When I spoke to the guy I had the encounter with he said that he had been with a guy in June and around the April/ May timeframe but he assured me both encounters were protected intercourse but unprotected oral. I asked him to take an hiv test which he agreed and told me the results are negative yesterday. I'm also worried because I know he would still be in his window period even though he tested negative, assuming he tested. Right now I am very scared and confused.

Offline jkinatl2

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Re: risky oral?
« Reply #1 on: July 15, 2006, 07:56:37 PM »
Your incident does not present a higher risk for HIV infection than the exceedingly small risks already associated with oral sex.

Asking someone else to take an HIV test is not cool.

Your level of safer sex practice and participation MUST be on the assumption that your partner is positive.

If you feel the need to test over this incident, then do so at 13 weeks. Then your partner's status will be immaterial. You will know your own HIV status.

Other STDs can be easily transmitted through oral sex, however, so I always urge people who are sexually active to have a twice-yearly STD panel, including an HIV test. Its the responsible thing to do.



"Many people, especially in the gay community, turn to oral sex as a safer alternative in the age of AIDS. And with HIV rates rising, people need to remember that oral sex is safer sex. It's a reasonable alternative."

-Kimberly Page-Shafer, PhD, MPH

Welcome Thread

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: risky oral?
« Reply #2 on: July 15, 2006, 08:07:01 PM »
Just want to chime in and second Jonathan's remarks about this incident. Nicks, bruises, sores and various other things that seem to happen to penises don't change the reality that there's never been a documented case of transmission from someone receiving a blowjob. But when worried everyone seems to feel their blowjob had special aspects to it.

Given how common a sexual act it is it is safe to say we would have known long before today if any such events would change the nil for reality risk level of this act.

You also need to keep in mind that your health is your own responsibility. Even a well intentioned person may not be able to give you an accurate report about their HIV status. So if you ever have a genuinely risky incident, and I hope you don't and this one does not qualify as such, but should you ever have a risky one having your own HIV test at 13 weeks after the incident is the way to go.

This time out I don't see any need for testing nor cause for any further concern.

Cheers,
Andy Velez

Offline inneedofhelp

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Re: risky oral?
« Reply #3 on: July 17, 2006, 09:15:53 AM »
Thanks for the answers on what I thought was a risky encounter. Of course my worries were in part to the number of websites all with conflicting advice as far as oral sex goes, I am sure we will have these conflicts forever. I'm still confused on how I could not get hiv from getting oral sex when I had a open sore on my penis, but I'm not an expert so I wont argue the point. I will still probably test out in 13 weeks just for further peace of mind however you all have put alot of my worry's to rest. Ann, is there anything you have ever heard that a sore can put me at any more risk? I would appreciate any further comments anyone might have regarding my issue. Thankyou so much.

Offline Ann

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Re: risky oral?
« Reply #4 on: July 17, 2006, 10:25:01 AM »
need,

Saliva is not infectious and that is why you do not need to worry about having a sore on your penis while getting sucked.

You did not have a risk of infection through getting a blowjob.

Use condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse and you will avoid hiv infection. It really is that simple. If you haven't already, please read through the  Welcome Thread and follow the links for more information. Please also read the condom and lube links in my signature line so you can use condoms with confidence.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline inneedofhelp

  • Member
  • Posts: 10
Re: risky oral?
« Reply #5 on: August 01, 2006, 07:29:53 PM »
Andy and Ann,

I just have a quick follow up question to ask you both. I decided to go to the doctor yesterday after 3 weeks of unusual symptoms that I am having. 2 days after my oral encounter I had a really bad sore throat that lasted about a week. Shortly after that I noticed a large lump under my right arm and smaller one under the left. I pretty much just ignored this untill the other day I was checking my body and when probing my groin area I found small pea sized lumps on each side of my groin/thigh area. They are not visible and I have to kind of feel and prob for them. I went to the doctor and she didnt check my groin nodes, saying that if they are not visible as lumps then its nothing to worry about and that pea sized nodes are common. I explained that the area is sore and she said its simply from probing and touching it too much, but still she didnt feel it necessary to check because they were not visible to me. She did check the lump under my arms and said that they were indeed swollem lymph nodes but being a had a sore throat that is most likely from that infection. Throat lymph nodes are not swollen. She further told me that unprotected oral sex, even though I gave and received and I did have sores on my penis, was not a large risk for infection and she still does not believe testing is necessary. I would like to get your opinions. I just felt everything was kinda strange to all happen at the same time. The swollen nodes have been going on about 3 weeks now. Thanks!

Offline Ann

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  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: risky oral?
« Reply #6 on: August 02, 2006, 04:54:15 AM »
inneed,

Your doctor knows a thing or two about hiv transmission - listen to her. Her advice is exactly the same as you have gotten here - and I also would have told you to keep your mitts off your glands.

You didn't have a risk and you don't need to test - unless it's part of a routine sexual health care check up that any sexually active adult should get at least once a year. Sexually active means having intercourse.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline inneedofhelp

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  • Posts: 10
Re: risky oral?
« Reply #7 on: August 05, 2006, 03:31:17 PM »
thanks so much, I hope these fears and anxieties subside soon. Will go to the doctor for a follow up on my arm/groin nodes in a week.

Offline inneedofhelp

  • Member
  • Posts: 10
Re: risky oral?
« Reply #8 on: October 13, 2006, 04:21:27 AM »
Hi Everyone! Well I just took my 3 month test over this incident and the results were negative! Thankyou so much for your help, I still read the threads and see what advice is given. I do have one more question. I asked the nurse about the ways of getting HIV from oral sex and told her not only about the rough patches on my penis but that I might of had a cracked/cut lip when giving the oral, she told me that cut, cracked, dry lips, etc... makes really no difference in terms of increasing or decreasting the odds of getting hiv from giving oral sex, because the risk in itself is too low and in reality getting or giving oral sex, even with a little cut lip isnt really warrant of testing or anxiety. Do you think she is right? Thanks so much!

Offline Ann

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  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: risky oral?
« Reply #9 on: October 13, 2006, 06:12:30 AM »
in,

Yes, the nurse is correct. Thank goodness there are some health care providers out there who know the real deal.

It was no surprise you tested negative. Now protect your negative status by using condoms. You need to be using condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, every time, no exceptions until such time as you are in a securely monogamous relationship where you have both tested for ALL STIs together. To agree to have unprotected intercourse is to consent to the possibility of being infected with a sexually transmitted infection.

Have a look through the condom and lube links in my signature line so you can use condoms with confidence.

Anyone who is sexually active should be having a full sexual health care check-up, including but not limited to hiv testing, at least once a year and more often if unprotected intercourse occurs.

If you aren't already having regular, routine check-ups, now is the time to start. As you've just had checks, make sure you remember to get checked again in six months or a year, depending on how active your sex life is. As long as you make sure condoms are being used for intercourse, you can fully expect your routine hiv tests to return with negative results. Don't forget to always get checked for all the other sexually transmitted infections as well, because they are MUCH easier to transmit than hiv.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline inneedofhelp

  • Member
  • Posts: 10
Re: risky oral?
« Reply #10 on: October 13, 2006, 01:59:34 PM »
Ann and Andy, I was stupid and had another oral episode, thats why I asked the nurse...I gave a guy oral sex for about 5 seconds even thought my lips are cracked from chapping and sometimes bleed. When I noticed there was some pre-cum I immediately stopped and spit out what I tasted. I'm not really too worried about this encounter though, givin this situation do you think I should retest from it or is it pretty insignificant.

Offline RapidRod

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Re: risky oral?
« Reply #11 on: October 13, 2006, 02:02:37 PM »
You don't need to retest again. I can see you haven't learned a damn thing. It's unbelievable.

Offline inneedofhelp

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Re: risky oral?
« Reply #12 on: October 13, 2006, 07:31:59 PM »
This wasnt part of the episode that I had tested over, this happened after my last test. I just was curious if I had to wait now another 3 months.

Offline RapidRod

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Re: risky oral?
« Reply #13 on: October 13, 2006, 07:51:17 PM »
What did your doctor tell you about testing? Go back to that post if you don't remember.

Offline inneedofhelp

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  • Posts: 10
Re: risky oral?
« Reply #14 on: October 14, 2006, 06:53:44 PM »
Thanks Rapid Rod, you know how to put things into persepective. I think its hard for us to learn unless its laid out clearly and dummy proof and I think you did that pretty well. Despite my little bit of bleeding, the 5 seconds and little precum in all common sense it doenst add to a risk at all. I will not wait the 3 months nor worry about testing about such a small incident. Thankyou

Offline inneedofhelp

  • Member
  • Posts: 10
Re: risky oral?
« Reply #15 on: April 07, 2007, 11:38:27 PM »
Hello Everyone, Sorry to post again after Ann being upset with me, but I have nowhere else to turn, the health departments are closed now and I just got some very troubling news from a former partner.

Around the 20th of Feb 2006, I had unprotected receptive anal sex with a random person, it was foolish but I did it and he did not ejaculate. I knew what I did was stupid so I tested around May 12th 2006 (close to 12wks) with negative results. I also tested over the unrelated oral sex stuff around Sept 20th (which was about 7 months after the anal episode). I did a home access test on Feb. 7th 2007 (about 11 months since the anal episode. I wasnt too worried about the anal event after the May testing, untill today when the person told me he was poz and might have been during the time we had sex together. Given all these tests I have taken ( 12 wks, 7 months and 11 months) am I in danger of having hiv from the anal episode, I havent had sex since the oral encounters but this guy really freaked me out today. I really need some help on this. All tests have been negative, do I need more testing? Am I safe from this poz guy in Feb of 06? what about hiv-2?

Offline Ann

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    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: risky oral?
« Reply #16 on: April 08, 2007, 04:59:41 AM »
in,

It does not matter if the partner you had unprotected anal intercourse with was hiv positive or of unknown status, three months is still conclusive.

You ARE hiv negative. Period, end of story. Protect your negative status by making sure condoms are ALWAYS used for anal or vaginal intercourse, every time, no exceptions. Read through the condom and lube links in my signature line so you can use them with confidence.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline inneedofhelp

  • Member
  • Posts: 10
Re: risky oral?
« Reply #17 on: April 08, 2007, 01:44:27 PM »
Ann, Andy, Rod and everyone kind of enough to take time to answer questions,

I want to express my thanks for such a quick response to my question regarding my year ago episode. It really was something I put out of my mind May 20th when I got my first set of results and the fact that the partner told me he was negative. Obviously whether he was or wasnt at that time is not important. Finding out a year later that he is positive and could have been at the time of our encounter, is not only a huge burden but a wake up call. I am so very glad that this site is here to give not only encouragement but to rationalize for us, when we are unable to rationalize. I had so many thoughts going thru my head, like were everyone of my three tests accurate or were they done correctly. I know now thanks to Ann and all of you that I am okay and I really got lucky. Thankyou so much, any further encouragement and opinions are welcome. Thankyou.

 


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