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Author Topic: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers  (Read 30419 times)

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Offline confusedme

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Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« on: November 04, 2007, 09:12:12 PM »
I decided to step up and name our new thread. Corny title, I know but I think it kinda fits. LOL
08/13/07 - Diagnosis confirmed
08/30/07 - T-cells 400, VL 6,500 (Baseline)
11/30/07 - T-cells 428, VL 9,950

Offline cjc

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #1 on: November 04, 2007, 09:38:34 PM »
I decided to step up and name our new thread. Corny title, I know but I think it kinda fits. LOL
  I like the title . You did good. Ladies  hope everyone is well. Will check back in tomorrow. Cristy

Offline MOONLIGHT1114

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #2 on: November 05, 2007, 12:33:29 AM »
Hi GFs~

What a day!  Iceman got here at 10am and we went to breakfast.  Yes, I WAS looking at stuffed pancakes, BT, but decided on an omelette instead.  We were together all day -- he didn't leave until 10:30pm.  He put a lot on the table and he has said he has fallen for me, and fallen hard.  He had no issues whatsoever in making that clear to me.  We spent the afternoon running errands and looking at furniture.  Finished watching the Redskins game at my place, and then we went to dinner.  During dinner the conversation got deep.  Ice told me about a very personal time in his life, and shared everything very openly.  I was very touched by what he had been through and admired him telling me something so personal.

So, I guess next time its my turn to tell something personal.  This guy is saying everything I have ever wanted to hear from a man and its not mushy, its dead-on sincere.  If this was coming from anyone else, they would most certainly be labled a leg-humper and cast aside.  This guy and I have a deep connection already, as he is a mirror-image of myself.  He DID ask why my ex left me and all I could say was ,"I don't know, he got cold feet."  What I should of said was "He wasn't strong enough to be my man."

Well, the best time of my life is awaiting me if this man will accept that I have HIV.  The difference between his personal issues and mine (HIV) is that his are all in the past, from 20 years ago.  I see it that way because he has been sober and drug-free for nearly 20 years.  I can see that he wants so much for us, but I can't help but think that he sees me through rose-colored glasses.  I said that to him, but he said that when he falls, he falls hard, that he's already attached.  Things really moved to a much higher level mentally today, as we are connecting all over the place.  He kept commenting on how much he loves to talk with me.

This almost seems to be too good to be true, but I will do what I always do, and just be me, and go for it!  This guy is such a gentleman.  Very interested in my mind and not just the physical attraction thing.  I mean, all we have done is kissed, he is so respectful of me, he has no idea what that means!  Respect is #1 on my list, followed by #2 Compassion.  Judging from Iceman's past, he is a compassionate person.  He said he couldn't wait until Wednesday to see me, so we are getting together Tuesday to cook dinner together. 

God give me strength, I don't want to lead him on.  We are both so happy, content and excited about the future.  I just have to do my jump and get over this HIV hurdle.  I really hope that he can trust me with HIV, and not just look at me for my virus.  So far he has been wildly attracted to my mind and how I am as an individual.  He is really attracted to my playful, sweet personality, but he is also right there in the trenches with me when we talk about serious shit.  I just have to bring mine to the table, and then I may be the happiest girl in these Forums.

I have been waiting for a guy like this for a very long time.  Don't need him, but I'll sure take him!

~ Cindy
HIV+ since '93, 1/12 - CD4 785 and undet.   WOO-HOO!!

Offline Dragonette

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #3 on: November 05, 2007, 02:41:04 AM »
Hi Cind

That sounds wonderful... I wish you all the luck with the disclosure and in general. Something similar happened to a friend of mine in amsterdam a while ago, she met this guy online, and now they are engaged, it took them just a couple of weeks. I am so keeping my fingers crossed for you!

I will check in again later. Betty, I hope you feel better. Cammie, you too... great pic in your avatar btw. Confused, I like the title, and now with all these guys in the mix it sure is fitting. Cristy, hope it went well with the huge booking (or is it yet to happen?).

Have to run to a bunch of appts this morning.

Have a great kickstart to the week all!
"If you keep one foot in yesterday, and one in tomorrow, you piss all over today". Betty Tacy

Offline BT65

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #4 on: November 05, 2007, 06:45:38 AM »
Good morning ladies:

Wow, Cin, I'm so happy for you!  When I read your post, I jumped up and started doing cheers!  (And no, I never was a cheerleader, but I was a stripper) :D.  It's about time something good happened for you.  Don't project about what he will say about the HIV thing.  People in recovery are more open-minded than "normies" so I think everything will go fine.  There's a meeting I used to go to where there are guys there in their 70's.  They were alright when I talked about having the virus.  In fact, they were even more supportive.  And if old croonies are alright, I'm sure your man will be also. 

Confused, thanks for starting this new thread.  I luv the name, btw.  It's so fitting!  How are you doing?

Queen, I'm glad you got the chance to have Rico for a whole night.  And no phone calls!  Isn't that amazing?  I wonder if he got really firm with his ex about calling him all the time.  It sounds like that's what might have happened.  Good for him if he did!  I'm sure you're feeling all giddy. 

Cristy, I am wondering how that evening went with the 90 people booking.  Do events like those give you big tips, more than usual? 

Drag, what appointments did you have today?  Anything involving #'s?  If so, please let us know how they are!  I will be getting my usual three month bloodwork next month.  I'm really anxious to see how those #'s are faring. 

Someone in the last thread, I think it was Viv, asked me about my degree.  If it was you, Viv, then I'm not getting a PhD.  Good Lord, I'm too old for that! :D  I'm getting a bachelor's in Psychology.  I've been thinking about going on to get my master's, but that's only a thought.  (You know, like an MSW).  It would involve a huge commitment on my part, because that would mean more student loans.  I just don't want to owe a lot of money during this time in my life.  I do agree that you should go back and finish your thesis and get your degree.  You came awfully close.  It can be done, you know that. 

I'm kind of apprehensive about going back to work today.  Not for physical reasons.  The job I have right now is telemarketing.  We're trying to get people to get the Discover card.  I know, alot of people aren't happy with that company, but hey, it's a job.  Anyway, our boss gets so frustrated at us if we don't make good numbers.  But, what are we supposed to do if people just don't want to get it?  BTW, I'm on the do-not-call list because I don't want these types of calls.  Also, that list expires next year, for any of you who are on it, you'll have to re-register again next year.  But anyway, I'm probably just over-stressing about this job.  I want to turn in good numbers, but if people don't want it, they don't want it.  Some people cuss me out (and get really nasty), some hang up etc.  It gets kind of depressing after awhile.  But, it is a job so I can't really complain too much.  It just seems like I'm so busy, I don't have time for hardly anything else.  If I'm not at work, I'm at school or doing homework.   I keep telling myself it will all be worth it, someday.

Yesterday I went to my sponsor's apartment.  She had a get-together of people in the "sponsorship family."  Liz, the girl I went out with a couple times was there, as one of my friend's is her sponsor (and also my sponsor's sponsor).  She told me that her TMJ is acting up and the doctor gave her Tylenol #3's for the pain.  That was like three weeks ago and she's still on them.  I wanted to ask her "What the fuck are you doing!"  She was on Klonopin first, now she's on Tylenol with codeine.  I know this game all too well.  I hope she doesn't end up relapsing, but if it were me, I know I would.  I've played the pill game, and I understand she may have needed the Tylenol 3's for a short time.  But to stay on them for any length of time is so dangerous for we addicts.  It just triggers something in the brain that wants and needs more after awhile.  Anyway, she gave me a big, long hug and told me how much she misses seeing me.  But where she's at right now, I'm glad I kind of cut it short.  I can't get involved with someone who's headed for trouble. 

Other than that, algebra is driving me crazy.  I'm going to meet with my proff tomorrow evening to try to get some help.  We're doing slopes and stuff like that now, and I'm totally lost.  So hopefully tomorrow will be helpful.  The other class is going alright.  There's just so much work.  My classes only last eight weeks, and in my Child & Adolescent Pscyhology class, we have papers due every other week.  Which makes my time on the weekends devoted to pretty much schoolwork.  Like I said, I keep telling myself it will all be worth it someday...... ::)

Have a good one ladies-
I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

Offline camille07

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #5 on: November 05, 2007, 08:20:07 AM »
Confused-  nice title.  Seems appropriate. 

My avatar was me from the wedding.   Great time but much of a whirl wind.

Cin-  Sounds like this guy is amazing.  But more importantly the connections you two have are really incredible.  Have you thought about when you would disclose.

Drag-  anything new with the ID doctor?  drug regime?  Is that one of the appointments?

Hope all is well with you all....

hugs,

Cammie


Offline confusedme

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #6 on: November 05, 2007, 11:47:18 AM »
Good morning everyone. Glad to see that y'all like the title. 

Cindy, glad that your day with Iceman went well. Good luck with finding the right way to tell him.

Drag, I hope all goes well at the doc for you.

Betty you are so much braver than me. I picked my major strictly by the amount of math required. I am a math moron. There is no way I could tackle algebra.

Cammie, that is a very good pic of you.

There's not much going on for me right now. I finally talked my husband into asking our doctor for something to help with his appetite. He was only eating once a day and not much when he did. He is gone to see her now. I hope whatever she prescribes takes care of it.

My second appointment is this month. I'm kind of anxious and nervous at the same time. I want to see my new numbers but the thought that they could be worse scares me. I wonder too if they could have improved any. Is that possible without meds? I am really hoping to stay off meds as long as I can.

« Last Edit: November 05, 2007, 12:28:05 PM by confusedme »
08/13/07 - Diagnosis confirmed
08/30/07 - T-cells 400, VL 6,500 (Baseline)
11/30/07 - T-cells 428, VL 9,950

Offline confusedme

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #7 on: November 05, 2007, 12:21:00 PM »
I have another question for all of the knowledgeable ladies here. Are there limitations (legal or otherwise) on the types of employment a person with HIV can obtain? I was told that someone with HIV cannot be employed as a cook but that sounds very discriminatory to me, especially since HIV/AIDS falls under the disability laws. Doesn't that alone keep employers from hiring someone of positive status for any job?
08/13/07 - Diagnosis confirmed
08/30/07 - T-cells 400, VL 6,500 (Baseline)
11/30/07 - T-cells 428, VL 9,950

Offline Queen Tokelove

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #8 on: November 05, 2007, 12:26:59 PM »
Yep, I think it's a fitting title too....Yep, Saturday night was great with Rico and so was last night. He had gone home Sunday morning but then after talking for a few times, he came back over to my house around 10:30 pm, instead of sending him home since he works early in the morning, I let him stay the night. My roomie fixed a late night brunch for all of us, we talked and he was out like a light. Being the nocturnal person that I am, I just watched him sleep. I dozed off for a bit then got him up for work. I'll prolly hear from him later on today or call him since he has been doing all the calling lately.. ;) We got plans set for Wednesday....

I have been feeling just as giddy as Cindy but has been thinking about the disclosure issue too. What I do know is that he doesn't have an issue with wearing condoms, that came up during a Valtrex commercial. Last night while enjoying brunch and sipping on Pepsi, we started discussing movies. Of all the movies out there, which one does he mention? Philadelphia with Tom Hanks in it, I also spit out my Pepsi. He didn't go into detail about hiv/aids but he did mention that the movie made him sad. I am not sure just how much he knows about hiv/aids but I think I will ease into the conversation on Wednesday to feel him out.

I want to disclose to him, I really do but I don't think he is ready yet because from conversations on his personal life, he has a lot on his plate that he has to deal with right now. What I do know, is that I am starting to really like him. He is such a gentleman and a sweetheart.

Confused--- Did we win the game last night? I totally forgot to watch. I know, shame on me... :D

Cammie-- Good to see you posting.

Dragonette-- You seem to be quite busy, hope you get all that out the way, I know how draining all that can be. That was me last week with appointments and stuff.

I hope the rest of you ladies are faring well. Ugh, we are suppose to be getting rain mixed with snow tonight with more snow to come by Friday. I hate winter. I will have to get my car off the road before Friday and park it for the winter, that's the Caprice. The other one is still not running, everyone says they will look at it but no one has yet. I think I will end up just taking it to a legal mechanic and being overcharged but at least it will be running. But it will set me back in the long run. I need to get up and get motivated, I still need to do the laundry.......but after posting for a bit.....later ladies....
Started Atripla/Ziagen on 9/13/07.
10/31/07 CD4-265 VL- undetectable
2/6/08 CD4- 401 VL- undetectable
5/7/08 CD4- 705 VL- undetectable
6/4/08 CD4- 775 VL- undetectable
8/6/08 CD4- 805 VL- undetectable
11/13/08 CD4- 774 VL--undetectable
2/4/09  CD4- 484  VL- 18,000 (2 months off meds)
3/3/09---Starting Back on Meds---
4/27/09 CD4- 664 VL-- undetectable
6/17/09 CD4- 438 VL- 439
8/09 CD4- 404 VL- 1,600
01-22-10-- CD4- 525 VL- 59,000
Cherish the simple things life has to offer

The Royal Blog

Offline confusedme

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #9 on: November 05, 2007, 12:35:20 PM »
I would have totally blanked out when he mentioned that movie. I always do when people talk about things that apply to me...especially when they don't know it. You are some brave ladies dealing with this disclosure thing. I "kinda" dealt with it once. My husband and I split up once after the whole health department contact. I dated this guy very breifly but I just couldn't even think about getting close to him without telling him that I had been with someone who was poz. I was scared to death to tell him and I was negative then. I am sure telling that you are poz is a whole new game.

Oh Queen, our boys totally kicked ass last night. 38 - 17 I wasn't glued to it or anything but Romo had a good passing game.
08/13/07 - Diagnosis confirmed
08/30/07 - T-cells 400, VL 6,500 (Baseline)
11/30/07 - T-cells 428, VL 9,950

Offline Queen Tokelove

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #10 on: November 05, 2007, 01:04:42 PM »
Woooooo Hoooooo.....Go Cowboys, We are 7-1, Yeeeeaaaaaahhhhhhhh Baby!!!!!!!
Started Atripla/Ziagen on 9/13/07.
10/31/07 CD4-265 VL- undetectable
2/6/08 CD4- 401 VL- undetectable
5/7/08 CD4- 705 VL- undetectable
6/4/08 CD4- 775 VL- undetectable
8/6/08 CD4- 805 VL- undetectable
11/13/08 CD4- 774 VL--undetectable
2/4/09  CD4- 484  VL- 18,000 (2 months off meds)
3/3/09---Starting Back on Meds---
4/27/09 CD4- 664 VL-- undetectable
6/17/09 CD4- 438 VL- 439
8/09 CD4- 404 VL- 1,600
01-22-10-- CD4- 525 VL- 59,000
Cherish the simple things life has to offer

The Royal Blog

Offline Dragonette

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #11 on: November 05, 2007, 04:30:55 PM »
Hey gang,

wow, what is going on with the guys (Queen, Cindy) is just awsome!! haven't heard from SunSeeker in a while, hopefully for all the right reasons too...

Cammie, I hope things will be easier for you soon. Also Betty, I know what you mean about watching someone slide down that slippery slope, particularly nasty if you care for them. maybe you can have a talk with her, to make her see the danger. Would she listen? I guess you won't know beforehand. But the most important thing is keep your self safe...

I will not have my VL & resistance results till a month or more from now, today was just regular things like the pyhsio & my psychologist, whom I see every 6 weeks or so (not a v. internsive therapy there).

yes I am quite busy, b/c I neglected work for so long, and also cos I am exceptionally slow with whatever I do.

today i came home and in btw my bike and apat door (3 meters or so) I managed to lose my keys, yup it was dark and raining too, I searched and searched to no avail, took my shopping apart, all the pockets, emptied my bag etc. I just couldn't fanthom how this happened. Finally my BF found them hanging on some spike off the bike. I use this as an illustration. stuff like this happens all the time. I'm just a scatterbrain I guess.

Have a great evening ladies, and good luck with everything
"If you keep one foot in yesterday, and one in tomorrow, you piss all over today". Betty Tacy

Offline MOONLIGHT1114

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #12 on: November 05, 2007, 05:16:33 PM »
Hi GFs~

Its great to see everyone here, but I'm still waiting to hear from Sunseeker, too.  :)

Queen, the way you are talking "afterglow" I thought you nipped everything in the bud (ha-ha "bud"  ;D ) and got your ankles up behind your ears already!  It figures that Rico brought up the Philly movie out of everything.  I haven't seen it in so long, but when you disclose to him, you can reassure him that times have changed.  You are living proof, having lived 10+ years with HIV.  Did you get your VL back yet?

Betty~  I got your PM reply, sorry things are shitty, but maybe you are stretching yourself too thin while you're under the weather.  The hardest thing for me over the past 5 years or so has been slowing down in order to benefit my health.  I don't choose to do it all anymore, its just too much, and I know better.  I got a kick out of you being a stripper!  You go, girl!  (I got Most School Spirit, btw) West Virginia is only 15 minutes from me, believe me I have had some crazy thoughts what with unemployment!  ;)  There aren't any night clubs where I am in Maryland, but across the river......LOL

Drag~  I am more scatterbrained than I used to be, and it started in my mid-30s!  ;)  I will think of something I want in the next room, walk to the room, and forget why the hell I walked to it in the first place, lol!  I try to do things slowly, too, just to keep things in moderation and not shock my system.  I would always push myself very hard at work, and every damn time I would end up paying for it with a cold or exhaustion or something.  Take it easy on yourself and don't feel bad if the turtles pass you!

Confused~  I'm not sure what the laws are with hiring someone who is pos, unless you're a doctor doing surgery!  I would think you could do anything you wanted to.  We know HIV is difficult to transmit outside of the body, and if you are responsible, there is no reason for you to worry about anything, unless you decide to become a professional boxer or something!  Maybe post your question in the main threads.  I'm sure the guys would have some input, esp Aunty Doxie and Aztecan.  Aztecan (Mark) is a case manager and very knowledgeable.

Cam~  Its nice to see you back here, we all missed you!  Even if we go to that dark place for a bit, I think we should try to sign on and check in.  I know, easier said than done when you're down and out, but we all get so much support here -- it can only be beneficial.

So, Iceman called around 11am this morning.  He is so upbeat and said I should just walk into the office at that killer job that I want.  The one I interviewed at 2x about 3 weeks ago.  I told him the thought of going in there was very intimidating and that I probably wouldn't do it.  He was trying to get my "mojo" going, so that I could just go in there unannounced.  I have never been that forward, but told him if I got a wild hair up my ass while I was out around town, I would just steer the Jeep in that direction!

Turns out the job called ME after Iceman and I hung up!  I couldn't believe my eyes when that number showed up on my cell.  I had checked in for the third week in a row last week, and the GM was out for the day.  He said that he and the owner were planning on getting together this week to discuss me and would be calling.  GM said he would call me tomorrow, but in a few days is good, too!  Yippeeeeeeee!!  I guess Iceman got my ESP mojo going, lol!

GFs, he is SMITTEN.  He has it BAD for me already.  He is not afraid to fall and be vulnerable where someone is concerned.  The fact that I make him feel comfortable enough to show his true emotions is amazing, a great compliment, I say.  Believe me, I asked Iceman why he didn't want to get out and date around, boost his ego, put some notches on his bedpost......He's not like that.  I have my radar up just in case, to protect this heart, but I feel he is being honest.  The man has nothing to hide.  Have you ever kissed a guy with your eyes open?  What did he do?  If he shut his eyes to your open ones, he's not comfortable with himself and symbolically isn't ready " to bare his soul to you."  I kissed Iceman last night and kept my eyes open at one point.  So did he.  It may sound like a myth, but it has always rang true when it comes to judging one's personality. 

I am thinking about disclosing tomorrow night after dinner.  This guy is so happy and I haven't really totally let myself be "me" cause I fear rejection after disclosure.  This guy trusts me already, so what do I have to lose?  I am just being chicken, and I want to take strength from his example, from the fact that he told me some heavy stuff already -- even with a smile on his face.  I have to disclose.  Iceman has made plans for every weekend and even wants to spend Thanksgiving evening together with me so I won't be alone this year.  I like his big plans, its a cozy feeling.

OK, I could vent all night about this man.  If I can land a good job that I have been waiting weeks for, and have a great man that I have been waiting years for, then my goodness, the shit of this summer will be well worth it!  Pray hard, girls, please pray hard.

Also, please pray for our Dan J. who had a second surgery today.  Most of you have posted in Hermie's thread, but we all need to send positive vibes to those two.  They have so much love for each other, and so much is going on right now to keep them apart.  Big prayers for Dan J. and Hermie (heartforyou) tonight!   :-*   :-*

~Cindy

« Last Edit: November 05, 2007, 06:44:58 PM by MOONLIGHT1114 »
HIV+ since '93, 1/12 - CD4 785 and undet.   WOO-HOO!!

Offline Nygurl225

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #13 on: November 05, 2007, 06:35:48 PM »
Hello ladies!!  Jeez you miss one day or even half a day on the forums and SO much happens!!

Cin~~ Iím so glad things are going well with iceman. Sounds like you really found yourself a decent guy.  I can only imagine the anxiety your feeling about disclosure. But what is meant to be will be. I wish you the best of luck with that.

Queen~ Seems things are going well for you in the man dept as well. Hopefully they stay that way.

Betty~ Iím in the same boat as you are with the school thing. Right now Iím overwhelmed and frustrated. Like you I keep telling myself it will be worth it one day. Hang in there it will pay off. Education is something nobody can ever take away from you as knowledge is power!

As for me, Iíve been feeling extra shitty lately. I think a combo of the pregnancy along with my busy schedule is taking a toll on my body. Iím exhausted to the point where Iím sick. But things need to get done so I have to keep going. Military man claims to be coming to stay with me for a little while because he doesnít want me to be alone. Iíve been in constant pain and have been having lots of false labor contractions. I think heís beginning to worry.  But obviously heís not too worried because he seems to be taking his sweet ass time getting here. He was supposed to come up today now heís saying maybe tonight or tomorrow morning. Iím trying to stay cool but Iím getting pist. I guess I have no choice but to sit back and let whatever is going to happen, happen. Well, @ this point Iím going to try to find the strength to get my school work done and some other errands. I hope all of you ladies are doing well tonight!

Offline srmn98

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #14 on: November 05, 2007, 07:34:45 PM »
Hi Everybody,

Lots of stuff going on for everybody.

Queen and Cindy, good luck on your disclosures. It sounds like Iceman and Rico are both smitten so I'm thinking about you both !!

I'll tell my disclosure story just in case it helps .....   I met my boyfriend last December. I had found out about my status only 3 months before -- dating was honestly the LAST thing on my mind. I was still recovering from the shock of my diagnosis and from a breakup 6 months earlier. So I met this guy... we got to know each other as friends for a few weeks ... and when he asked me out on a date I told him "let's not date, let's just be friends right now ... "  because I just couldn't imagine disclosing and wasn't willing to even kiss him without doing so. (just my personal limits with it)  He seemed kind of puzzled because it was obvious that we were totally hitting it off. Anyway, I couldn't help myself ... I just wanted to keep hanging around him as friends, I was just completely drawn to him. One night, he leaned over and tried to kiss me and I completely FREAKED OUT !!  lol. He said I had a look of TERROR on my face, and I probably did. He called me out on it -- and I broken down, and through my tears burst out with something like "I can't date you, I have HIV."  He gave me a big hug and sat on the couch next to me, held my hand, and listened to my whole story. He told me he was there for me. We kept hanging out as friends for another few weeks -- and then one day I went over to his house and he a book sitting on his couch about dating somebody with HIV. We have taken things very slowly, but he was amazing through the disclosure process.

So anyway ... I just thought maybe my story might help you two as you get closer to your disclosures. I was really amazed ... at the time, I couldn't imagine anybody wanting to date me ever again ... his reaction made me realize that not everybody saw HIV like I saw it at the time ...  he gave me a lot of faith in people in general. People can be really amazing, and I wish you both the best. I'll be waiting anxiously for your next posts !!!

Things with me have been a lot better. After a lot of talking, my relationship has been back to normal. I think he was in a funk that didn't have a lot to do with me ... but of course I assume it's this HIV ... and it wasn't. I have to remind myself that HIV doesn't define me and that when things happen in life I cannot always assume it is because of my status. I met one of his sisters the other day for the first time ... I'm not sure if she knows my status or not (his other family does) -- and while she was nice to me, I kept wondering in the back of my head, is she wondering about my HIV status? Does she know ? Does she think I'm bad for her brother because of it ?  I'm really trying to work on not doing this but it's tough ... I sometimes feel like I have a big red X on my forehead. Anybody else feel this way ?

Good luck to everybody.... school, pregnancy, jobs, meds .....

Sara








Offline Winiroo

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #15 on: November 05, 2007, 08:10:07 PM »
I cant think of any limitations as far as jobs. Aside from anything to do with putting your hands inside someones body. IE surgery or something to that effect. Or juggling knives around small children possibly LOL
Could be different in different countries. No clue...

I'm going to have to take some time to read the rest a little bit later. I'm lacking the patience to sit here that long right now. But I shall return!



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Offline MOONLIGHT1114

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #16 on: November 05, 2007, 09:51:54 PM »
Thank you, Sara, for sharing your experience.  I have disclosed to plenty of guys this year, and also back in 2001-2002 when I was a serial dater.   :D 

I have learned that no matter how wound up I get thinking ahead about disclosing, all I can do is.....DO IT.  The man is going to react however he is going to react.

Iceman called again tonight, 2x, and we spoke for 2 hours the first time.  Very deep conversations, whoever knew talking and sharing could feel this good?  He is so pleased because I "get him."  He is telling me things that took him years to tell his ex wife.  I WILL tell him tomorrow.  I am actually feeling more confident about doing this now.  Sure, there is a chance he will turn tail and run, but somehow I don't think so.  This man trusts me so much that I can tell him about HIV and educate him if need be, and....he will listen, cause that's what he does.  He listens.  He talks.  He listens.

Oh boy oh boy oh boy!   :D  Never looked forward to disclosure before, hmmmm.  I have to wonder how many people Iceman knows from AA that may be pos, too? 

I feel blessed tonight.  I may feel even more blessed tomorrow! 

~ Cindy

HIV+ since '93, 1/12 - CD4 785 and undet.   WOO-HOO!!

Offline vivyt

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #17 on: November 05, 2007, 09:55:56 PM »
Wow, things sure move fast in here!  :) If I miss a day I am sooo behind in what's going on!

Cin-I am excited for you. I miss that "feeling" of really liking someone and having that chemistry. I hope it all works out for you.

Betty-I am really trying to motivate myself to back into the grind. After being so sick last year I thought I would ease back in this year, but I am probably just making an excuse... ;)

Queen-Do you think maybe Rico is letting you know that he's OK with everything? Who knows right?

Not a lot to report here. I just found out that I am getting a new student... >:( So now I have 32...ugh! It is such a hassle when someone comes in once the year has started. I have to find extra books, bring them up to speed, find out where they are academically, etc. I am sure it will be alright, just venting here :)

Take care everyone!

Offline MOONLIGHT1114

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #18 on: November 06, 2007, 12:36:00 AM »
LOL, damn we get ten feet down the screen in a new thread before I remember to do this, lol!   :D

For new readers, here's our "Dating Threads" history....
Part I:       http://forums.poz.com/index.php?topic=12526.0
Part II:      http://forums.poz.com/index.php?topic=13850.0
Part III:     http://forums.poz.com/index.php?topic=14375.0
Part IV:     http://forums.poz.com/index.php?topic=14848.0
Part V:      http://forums.poz.com/index.php?topic=15148.0
Part VI:     http://forums.poz.com/index.php?topic=15558.0
Part VII:    http://forums.poz.com/index.php?topic=15951.0
Part VIII:   http://forums.poz.com/index.php?topic=16271.0

« Last Edit: November 06, 2007, 12:44:27 AM by MOONLIGHT1114 »
HIV+ since '93, 1/12 - CD4 785 and undet.   WOO-HOO!!

Offline BT65

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #19 on: November 06, 2007, 06:27:11 AM »
Good morning ladies:

For those of you who don't know (which is everyone other than Cin) I quit my job yesterday.  The boss tried to talk me out of it, but I told her a very firm "no."  She filled out the paperwork that said I "voluntarily resigned" in case I ever wanted to go back there.  It was really starting to effect me emotionally and physically wise.  I still feel sick, and now I believe I have a yeast infection.  It's got to be yeast, since I haven't been sexually active in like four years.  My sinuses are still plugged, I've been getting chills, and I'm starting to cough some stuff up (gross, I know).  So I guess I'll be calling my doctor today again.  The yeast thing I know can be cleared up with something from the drugstore over the counter.  But I'm not sure about the rest of this stuff.  I guess I should've known better after not working for 14 years, than to try to mix school and a five day a week job.  So, back to the budget being tight etc.....

I'm anxiously waiting for the disclosure results, Cin!  I'm sure he will be alright with it.  I don't know that he would know anyone in AA with HIV.  People in NA might know more people with it, as there seems to be riskier behavior with people in NA than there is with people in AA. But, I'm sure he'll be accepting of it, just from the way he sounds.  I'll be thinking about you today. 

Queen, what's happening in the disclosure department in your area?  I wonder who much he knows since he was talking about "Philadelphia."  That just sounds too coincidental.   I'm sure he will be alright with it.  Sounds like he is already from what was said.  I figured you guys were banging on a regular basis also, since he spent the night at your place! :D  I'll be thinking about you also.....

I wonder what's been happening with Em.  Haven't heard from her lately.  Em, where are you girl? 

To all you other ladies who are kind of new here, I hope you all are doing well!  Today will be a hard day for me, because of feeling so sick and trying to get back into a somewhat normal routine.  Please keep me in your thoughts today, ladies-
I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

Offline Dragonette

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #20 on: November 06, 2007, 07:20:51 AM »
Betty

2 poz friends of mine here, women, have quit a similar job (actually easier, customer services not sales) after about 2 weeks. It's just really hard. As someone who has done phone surveys I know that... it's draining. Most HEALTHY people don't last more than a couple months and they don't have school on the side. Be kind to yourself... sometimes it's just not worth it.

About the yeast, I have it on/off too not related to sex. when I get it I buy OTC vaginal tablets & cream, I also eat a lot of yoghurt or take the bio-something pills (the same stuff they put in the yoghurts but much more concentrated). I do assume that the sinus/cough thing is related to you going back to smoking or the combination of smoking and Chantix. Anyway better get checked up just in case...

I know it's more normal to congratulate someone over finding a job but in some cases it's suitable for quitting a job, so congratulations dear.

You are in my thoughts~~ don't be hard on yourself, you're doing the best you can and more than many people can do...

Hugs,

Dragonette (anxiously awaiting more good news on the male, erhm, front, nudge nudge wink wink).

All puns aside, Cindy, Queen, GOOD LUCK with the disclosure, I am really really hoping it will be as smooth as possible.

Sara, thnx for sharing your own story. That's a nice one... I can't say mine was as romantic. I'll write it sometime too. I am really happy for ya esp now that things are less rocky. Always look on the bright side of life...

PS NY girl, of course you are tired etc, you're heavily pregnant! good on ya for keeping everything up & going, I can't do that and I am not even 1 hour pregnant ... you're just great.
« Last Edit: November 06, 2007, 07:35:25 AM by Dragonette »
"If you keep one foot in yesterday, and one in tomorrow, you piss all over today". Betty Tacy

Offline MOONLIGHT1114

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #21 on: November 06, 2007, 10:15:33 AM »
Hi GFs~

Viv, you have another student?  Total of 32 now?  Man, I have to look up where you're located.  THAT is a big class!  What grade do you teach?  I am sure your tolerance level to noise is much better than mine, lol!

BT~  Yes, congrats on doing whats right for YOU.  Class AND working 5 days a week is a bit much.  Maybe you could get a PT job 2 days a week for a little extra pocket money?  As far as the yeast infection goes, how have your sugars been?  Do you test a lot each day?  Yeast can be a sign of elevated sugars over a prolonged period of time, and is esp common in diabetics.  maybe google "diabetics and yeast infection."  I know they are hell, like poison ivy on the poontang.  Or "poonani" to quote our Queen!   :D

Drag~  What are you up to?  Working in two housecoats?  LOL, you should see ME in my garb, lol!  I look like a big purple marshmallow, lol!  :)  So one month until your results come back, right?  I am anxiously awaiting!  See how I quoted you in my signature line below?  I was reading Part IX last night, getting ready for disclosure this evening, and your words really struck home.  There are so many people who strive for control and perfection and they are the ones who just lose it!

Queen~  Where did you disappear off to last night?  I am echoing Betty some here.  WHY would Rico bring up the movie Philly and make comments during a Valtrex commercial?  I am wondering if HE has something to disclose, or if he has heard about you through the grapevine.  Is it possible that he has?  This could actually turn out better than you think, if he is going through something, too.  Let us know when you get your VL results, call your Nurse Girl at the office. :)

Iceman sent me another pic of himself this morning.  He is always smiling, and his name is fitting, not just because of the hockey thing, but also because he has really light blue eyes, ice blue, in fact!

I am nervous about tonight, because we will only be together maybe three or four hours, but maybe its better that way.  If I plan to disclose, I am going to have to cut to the chase right after dinner.  Our date Friday was 7 hours, and Sunday was over 12 hours, but tonight will be short.  Damn.  I really hope that this works out and that he can trust me.  If he wasn't so open with me there's no way I would disclose this early.  Shit, we've only kissed and we are still getting to know each other.  He is just gung-ho on having all 12 cylinders fire towards a future with me.  Dammit.  Every time I think something is too good to be true it usually is, but maybe God has taken me down this path to get to this guy.  Someone who is compassionate and deep and understanding, and who won't pass judgment.

The one thing I fear that a guy will fear is his own safety when it comes to HIV.  Ice has been snipped, but hell he's also been with only one woman for 15 years, too.  He's got to be thinking about protection if he's entering the dating game, or maybe not?  I don't know.  I'll keep him safe, just like I always have when I have dated guys.  Oh I hope he can trust me with this so that we can take this further.  I have to let him know that I am fine, my counts are good, and that I can keep him safe.  Damn booger of a virus isn't going to get any man that this girl is with.  The virus stopped with me 15 years ago.

OK, going to bake some brownies for later.  I'll win his heart and his stomach!  Now, BT don't be thinking about my brownies like you did last time.   ;D  You need chicken noodle, girl, say it with me  "chicken noodle!"  I am praying for you today, just like you asked.  I always think about all of us here, a Ya-Ya Sisterhood of our own!

Tendai how are you?

Dawn, how was Cirque?

Sun, are you speaking Spanish yet, girl?  LOL

Cam, Cristy, Sara, NY, confused, Em and our long lost Nic (zachy's mom), how are you ladies doing?

~ Cindy
« Last Edit: November 06, 2007, 12:00:51 PM by MOONLIGHT1114 »
HIV+ since '93, 1/12 - CD4 785 and undet.   WOO-HOO!!

Offline Queen Tokelove

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #22 on: November 06, 2007, 02:32:27 PM »
Hey There Ladies-------

I am so fucking on cloud 9, excuse the cussing but I am just super hyped!!!!! I got up around 10 ish today, not sure what's up with that but it has been happening a lot lately. Woke up to see some damn snow and it had came down too, my car was covered. Checked my vm to hear a message from Nurse Leah from the clinic, my viral load came back, I am UNDETECTABLE. Remember, I just started Atripla/Ziagen on 9/13/07, my viral load had been 16,590, I put that in my sig line now... ;D I called Nurse Leah and chatted with her for a few, she congratulated me and she was telling me a few things about Atripla. I was concerned about taking it late a few times and she said that was ok but not to miss a dose because out of the 3 meds in Atripla, the Sustiva is the one that lasts the longest, the others wear off faster. Which could cause resistance but no worries there, I haven't missed a dose.

I also had to stop by my ASO and see my case manager to sign some paper work for SPBP, a program to help with paying for my Atripla since Medicare will only pay so much and will have me going to get refills every 23 days along with a co-pay, I think with SPBP there is no co-pay. So while there, I shared my news and picked up some condoms... ;)

Now on about Rico. Yes, we did have sex. I will tell you all this since I feel like Cindy about the Ya- Ya Sisterhood thing we have here with these threads. I am beating myself up about it really and even though I still  am feeling the afterglow, it is kinda of bittersweet to me since I have not disclosed to him. I don't know if any of you have read my past posts on disclosure but I have serious issues with it. I started a thread about it here in the Women's Forum as well as in the Intro thread where my story is. And I usually encourage those new ones here to disclose but when they feel the time is right. So at the moment I am feeling my own words but encourage you to read my previous posts before passing judgement on me. Now you are asking what are my plans, right? At the moment, not to disclose. Why? Because I am still feeling him out and because I know of the things that is going on in his life, I don't think I need to add to it. I have taken precautions and made sure that a condom was always worn and have gotten more. And now knowing that my vl is undectable, I do feel a bit safer. I do plan on talking more to him about hiv and his feelings on it because I really want to know where he stands on this. I will be having this talk with him on Wednesday when he comes over and I will keep you updated. Try not to be hard on me because I really had no intentions on having sex with him, it just kinda happened and now that it has, I can't take it back.

I have to go now, I think my sugar is trying to crash on me but since I feel the way I do about you all, I felt the need to keep it real and let you know what is really going on and not leave anything out. So, in other words I am really putting myself out here. Thanks for listening...



Intro Thread:
http://forums.poz.com/index.php?topic=11765.0

http://forums.poz.com/index.php?topic=14663.0
« Last Edit: November 06, 2007, 03:39:34 PM by Queen Akasha »
Started Atripla/Ziagen on 9/13/07.
10/31/07 CD4-265 VL- undetectable
2/6/08 CD4- 401 VL- undetectable
5/7/08 CD4- 705 VL- undetectable
6/4/08 CD4- 775 VL- undetectable
8/6/08 CD4- 805 VL- undetectable
11/13/08 CD4- 774 VL--undetectable
2/4/09  CD4- 484  VL- 18,000 (2 months off meds)
3/3/09---Starting Back on Meds---
4/27/09 CD4- 664 VL-- undetectable
6/17/09 CD4- 438 VL- 439
8/09 CD4- 404 VL- 1,600
01-22-10-- CD4- 525 VL- 59,000
Cherish the simple things life has to offer

The Royal Blog

Offline MOONLIGHT1114

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #23 on: November 06, 2007, 04:26:49 PM »
GF Queen~  You know I only want the best for you where Rico is concerned.  I hope it doesn't backfire on you.  Cute, Goderator Andy is reading our thread!  I love it when the guys peek in here!    ;D

QUEEN IS UNDETECTABLE!!    QUEEN!!!!      QUEEN IS UNDETECTABLE!!
Congrats on the great results!  I became undetectable when I started on Sustiva, and I haven't been detectable since, in over five years! 

I am getting nervous now, because in about 2 hours I will be trying to keep my Chinese food down, while trying to get my nerve up.  Worst thing that can happen when I disclose to Iceman is that he will just stop calling, like so many have.  I have never been a leg-humper, but maybe I'll work that a little tonight, and really tell Iceman that I think things could be great with us.  Its usually the guy that has trouble trusting me, and already Iceman has shown that he trusts me, so we'll just see how it goes. 

I'll be sure to post tonight after he leaves.  Oh goodness, all I am doing is sitting here and I feel like I'm pacing.  Queen, I hollered for you on IM, where are you?   ???   So restless now.

Oh man, he is leaving work in a half hour, so this is it.  I gotta try to chill and not eat all the brownies I just baked.

~ Cindy
« Last Edit: November 06, 2007, 04:29:29 PM by MOONLIGHT1114 »
HIV+ since '93, 1/12 - CD4 785 and undet.   WOO-HOO!!

Offline Dragonette

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #24 on: November 06, 2007, 04:47:39 PM »
Hi Queen

I don't judge you for having sex, I am sure you kept is safe and I have no issue with not disclosing if it's safe, like in a one night stand or whatever (which is legal here btw). I just hope Rico will be cool with it. In a sense, this is raising the stakes, b/c I think it is easier to disclose before not after. Then again I have only disclosed once, but this is my feeling. I doesn't mean it can't work out, but it is riskier, and harder, to keep HIV a secret once you have sex, you can't stop thinking about it I assume... I hope so much everything will work out for you two. Congrats on becoming undetectable!

Cindy, good luck again for tonight. Keeping all organs crossed for you. Hard to watch TV that way... Remember you are A  great catch... Have fun tonight...

Hugs,

"If you keep one foot in yesterday, and one in tomorrow, you piss all over today". Betty Tacy

Offline Nygurl225

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #25 on: November 06, 2007, 05:30:36 PM »
Hi Ladies!!  Cin~ Best of luck tonight. Iím praying for ya!! Please keep us posted.

Betty~ Iím sorry to hear your still sick. Hang in there!! Like Cindy said ďChicken soupĒ and prob some hot tea. Pamper yourself and try to take it easy. We all need to say screw the world and just take care of us sometimes. Seems like now is your turn.

Queen~ Congrats on being undetectable!!!! Iím very happy for you!  And  as far as sex with Rico. We are all here to support you NOT to judge you. I can personally understand your issues with disclosure. All I will say is please continue to be safe. I think Cindy says it best when she says ďThe virus stops hereĒ.  Weather we choose to disclose or not, It is my belief that we need to make sure we donít pass this virus on.  That being said I hope things continue to go well between Rico and yourself!

Dragonette~ Thank you for your encouraging words. They help a lot.

As far as my life goes, nothing much new or exciting. Military man will be on his way here in a few hours. Itís been awhile since weíve seen each other and Iím a bit nervous but relieved that I wont be here alone anymore. I guess  only time will tell what is to be between myself and military man. Although, I do hope things work out for the better between us, Iím also very on guard. I guess like everyone else I want the ďwhite picket fenceĒ but who knows what reality will bring me.

Offline Queen Tokelove

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #26 on: November 06, 2007, 05:38:35 PM »
Thanks Cindy and Dragonette for your words. You're right Dragonette, it does indeed raise the stakes. I feel like I have taken a step backwards since I had just disclosed to my roomie but this is different circumstances. After posting what I did earlier, I discussed it with her. She feels I should disclose but she doesn't think now is the time. I will do like I said I would with Rico and really hope for the best.

Right now, I just want to celebrate the undetectable viral load, I am still on cloud 9 about that. Yeah, Cindy, it still trips me out that the fellas check out our thread but maybe it gives them a kind of heads up on things from a woman's prospective. I know I have gotten a few PMs in the past from guys who have read something I have said.

Yeah, good luck with the Iceman tonight. But you always seem to get the ones who seem to be cool with your status. And since he is in AA like Betty said maybe he will be more open. Sorry, I wasn't around on IM earlier, hell I was looking for you and didn't see you on....We think too much a like girlie and we always seem to IM when something crucial is coming up. Then you mentioned making the brownies, I made chocolate chip cookies... ;) Keep us posted cause most of us are sitting on the edge of our seats especially me... :-X

Ny--- You were posting as I was trying to post. Thanks for your words too. I will not be anything but safe in regards to being sexual with Rico. As far as Mr. Military, keep your guards up but I wouldn't expect too much because then you can't be disappointed but then if he does man up or whatever, it will be more of a surprise. Not sure if that makes sense to you.
Started Atripla/Ziagen on 9/13/07.
10/31/07 CD4-265 VL- undetectable
2/6/08 CD4- 401 VL- undetectable
5/7/08 CD4- 705 VL- undetectable
6/4/08 CD4- 775 VL- undetectable
8/6/08 CD4- 805 VL- undetectable
11/13/08 CD4- 774 VL--undetectable
2/4/09  CD4- 484  VL- 18,000 (2 months off meds)
3/3/09---Starting Back on Meds---
4/27/09 CD4- 664 VL-- undetectable
6/17/09 CD4- 438 VL- 439
8/09 CD4- 404 VL- 1,600
01-22-10-- CD4- 525 VL- 59,000
Cherish the simple things life has to offer

The Royal Blog

Offline Winiroo

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #27 on: November 06, 2007, 07:43:15 PM »
Queen - Congratulations on your undetectable viral load. That is awesome. I'd be scared to death to disclose after the fact.  Hopefully he doesn't go psycho when you do decide to tell him. I'd have to disclose before any naughty bits came into play. But that's just me.

Cindy - Good luck with Iceman. Since my diagnosis I've never dated anyone negative. I was always too intimidated to put myself out there. Fear of rejection and all. Limiting yourself to positive men isn't easy. Fortunately I've found one worthy of keeping.

Bettytacy sorry to hear about the yeast. That's soooo uncomfortable. Hope you start feeling better soon. It should help now that you'll have more time to take care of yourself.

Viv - Good luck with your student. I hope he/she is the brightest most easy going of the bunch.

srmn98 - How heart warming. He sounds like a real open minded, nice guy.

Nygurl225 - How far along are you? I know the last couple of months suck. With my first son I was just ready to get him out of me I was so big and miserable. LOL

Nothing new to report with me. I went to a job training class today. Its my second time going. I go once a week. Terribly boring and confusing insurance junk.

I hope I didnt forget anyone....




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ďBeing powerful is like being a lady. If you have to tell people you are, you aren't.Ē Margaret Thatcher

Offline confusedme

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #28 on: November 06, 2007, 09:07:40 PM »
Cindy and Queen, I am nervous for you both. I can barely wait to hear the rest. Good luck to both of you.

You'll find no judgement here either. Life is what it is and sometimes things just happen.

Nothing really going on for me. I went to work, went to vote and came home. I've been feeling really weak and queasy lately. Not sure what that is about, hopefully nothing major. I think I'll turn in early tonight.

Hugs to all! -- CM
08/13/07 - Diagnosis confirmed
08/30/07 - T-cells 400, VL 6,500 (Baseline)
11/30/07 - T-cells 428, VL 9,950

Offline vivyt

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #29 on: November 06, 2007, 11:04:03 PM »
Cindy and Queen-I am very nervous for both of you. I can't even imagine telling anyone other then my family about my status. I can't wait to find out what happened. I am sending you positive thoughts!

Well today was sooo stressfull! I just wanted to go back home at 9:30. I welcomed my new student today (oh by the way to answer Cindy's question I am in southern CA...Orange County) and the other kids were very helpful so that was nice. Of course all of that was about to end. To give some background...I have quite a handful this year. Lots of issues. One of my students is autistic and he does not have an aide. Well today he totally went off and hit another student. I had to stop my lesson and have another teacher watch my kids and take him up to the office. I have already met with the school psychologist and special ed. rep and they are not too eager to do anything. He ended up being suspended since this was not the first time he had done this. I also want to mention that he is very high functioning and VERY bright. He knows what he is doing. About an hour after that another student shut his hand in the door and was completely upset over that...whew! I was so glad when it was 2:15! :) I hope tomorrow is much better!

Have a good night all!

Offline srmn98

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #30 on: November 06, 2007, 11:46:54 PM »
Hi All,

Cindy .... I'm still glued to the computer wanting to hear about Iceman tonight ! :)  Thanks for filling me in on more background ..... there is a lot to know about everybody coming into the group as a new member ... but I'm learning more about you all. Hope it went well.

vivyt ... teaching is hard work but must be very rewarding too.

queen ....  I'm not here to judge either. My personal philosophy is to put myself in the other person's shoes .... what would I expect from them in terms of disclosure if the shoe were on the other foot ? For me, I would want to know before anything happened as I want to be in control of what effects my mental and psychological health. I know disclosure is terrifying ... but I also know that you sound like a very strong woman and I know that you can do it. nuff said.  except... congrats on undetectable.

winiroo ... yeah .... he is !  finally, a nice one :)

dragonette... hope you feel better ...

betty .... congrats on quitting your job. it sounds like it is the right choice for you.

confused me and nygurl ..... still getting to know you two but am reading your posts. :)

I think that's everybody. Not much new going on here with me. Got my hair colored and cut today ... feels good to have a new color (darker brown with red). I have to go in for my bloodwork soon and I always have such a hard time convincing myself to make the appointment ... do any of you struggle with that ?  I guess I'm just scared of what they will tell me next. :(

Night,

Sara





Offline Nygurl225

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #31 on: November 07, 2007, 12:58:47 AM »
Well ladies it's almost one am and once again military man has been nothing but a disappointment. He told me he was leaving to come up and see me today, when I called to ask when he was coming he hadnít left yet. This was at 9:30pm!!! I was pist. He told me he would call me back in a little bit. As time past I became more and more anxious. Began text messaging him and calling. He in return began ignoring my calls. Needless to say, I got really mad lost my temper and text messaged him some pretty mean things. Not really spiteful but I was blunt. I told him that I was sick of his shit and my child and I didnít need undependable people like him in our lives. He could either be a man and keep his word or he could leave us both alone.  I donít need this stress in my life. I know better then to expect anything from him because heís been nothing but a disappointment in the past but his actions still hurt. So now Iím pist, depressed and once again feeling just plain shitty!! UGH!!! I hate men!!! I feel as if I am at my breaking point with this man and this situation. Iím literally sick to my stomach. For the most part I have been very calm and have kept my cool throughout this whole situation, but tonight was the straw that broke the camels back. I guess Iíll allow myself to have my emotional breakdown tonight and tomorrow it will be time to pick myself up and move forward. I try not to let myself feel sorry for myself and be bitter for too long. Life is too short for that shit. Well ladies, I hope everyone is having a better night then I am. Iím off to try and calm my nerves a bit and attempt to sleep. Night All!

Offline MOONLIGHT1114

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #32 on: November 07, 2007, 01:52:26 AM »
This song is for all of us tonight, GFs.  ALL of us.........

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ITM2AKRT9cI

Oh NY, I'm sorry your man is disappointing you tonight.  I hope he isn't calling off the entire visit, even if you ARE pissed at him.  You could use an extra pair of hands.  I know your emotions are running high.  I get moody when my blood sugar is high and I get very irritable.  I can't imagine how you feel, with this baby due in just four weeks.  When is your due date?  I am thinking December 3rd, just throwing some ESP out there tonight.....  ;)  Thanks for your prayers tonight....

Hi Sara~  Thanks for the well-wishes, sorry to keep you waiting, lol!  As far as struggling with making an appointment, you have to do it.  You just have to.  This is a way of life for you now, and the best thing you can do for yourself is to get regular check-ups.  Yes, there were times when I would drive to the lab and I would pray to God, asking for good results the following week.  Sometimes I would get emotional and shed some tears, other times I would simply ask for strength and courage.  I have been getting my blood drawn since I was 11 for diabetes, and since 1993 for HIV.  Its a way of life and its normal, but I understand your mixed emotions over it.  Give yourself time with all of this, things will get easier.  You have us girls now, too!

Hey Viv~  You Cali girl ;)  I have family in Cathedral City and Santa Monica, but I've never been further west than Chicago.  Thanks for your positive thoughts tonight.  What grade do you teach, btw?

Hi CM~  Weak and queasy?  Weren't you turning in early a few nights ago, too?  Are you OK?  I agree with what you said, "Sometimes things just happen...."  I agree, keep scrolling down, GF!  ;)

Hi Win~  I have only dated one pos guy (meaning more than just the initial date, lol) once since being pos.  That was Stone from August and Sept.  I'm trying not to think about him, since the way things ended was just awful.  I had one date each with two other pos guys, one in 2002 and one this past March.  He is a good friend now and we IM some.  He lives in MD too.  Thanks for wishing me luck tonight.  Seems all of the girl power got together tonight while I was away from the Forums and you all sent good vibes my way!

Hi Queen~  I signed into IM tonight at 1239am, and the first thing I see is you going offline a few seconds before me.  LOL  We are on the same wavelength, GF!  As far as me getting guys who are cool with my status, believe me, I have had my share of turndowns.  I just seem to cluster a bunch of guys around me and try to zero in on the one who compliments my personality the best.  I look for compatibility.  Trust me, its like a 3-ring circus at times, hell remember the threads in July?  LMAO  I also think I am a great judge of character and pretty damn intuitive.  I know what works for me and what doesn't.  I am also finding that through more disclosure over the years I have become more secure in myself.  Thanks for wishing me good luck from the Queen herself! Have you talked to Rico tonight?  The virus stops with you, too, GF.  Congrats again on an undetectable VL.  Queen is fucking UNDETECTABLE!!!!!  In only 6 weeks?  Hee hee heeeeeeeeeeee!   :D  What GREAT news!  I still can't get over it, so psyched for you!

OK, pull the curtains back, drum roll, cue the string section........woodwinds.......brass

I hear a symphony playing!  I have an exclusive boyfriend who adores me!  ADORES me!  I got his ass upstairs so we could talk in my room.  He starts giving me a back massage and I am making all kinds of small talk about AA, telling Iceman that I admire his confidence in himself.  I told him he was an inspiration to ME, and because of that, I had something I wanted to share with him as well.  He was laying there, looking me right in the eyes.  I beat around the bush for a minute, I told him he might be surprised, and that I normally wouldn't reveal something so personal so early on.  But I also said that he gave me the courage to do so.  Finally, I just simply said "I am HIV+."  I can't even remember what his first words to me were.  I kept averting my eyes and then telling myself to look him directly in the eyes again.  The lights were off, candles lit, we were relaxed....  I think he asked, "How are you doing?"  I said I was fine and asked if he knew anyone from AA or from the days when he used.

And girls, then things got crazy easy in a way I have never experienced before while disclosing.  Iceman blew my mind.  Just as gently and easy as ever, he tells me he's got HepC.  My reaction?  I smiled, and we hugged each other tight as I said, "We're practically in the same boat!"  I mean I was so relieved that he could somehow relate.  Isn't that the craziest thing?  I smiled and he smiled and we laughed and I told him that he had made all of this so easy for me, by being trusting and open with me on our dates.  And then to hear he's got Hep?  Isn't that just backwards that I am happy, kind of, if that's what you call it?  ::)

I admitted to him that I wondered earlier how he got through abusing IV drugs in the 80s without getting HIV or Hep.  I had even mentioned a Sirius radio DJ who died of Hep last month, and Iceman said his stomach jumped the other night when I brought up the subject to him. 

It just comes down to this....He gave a little of himself, I was accepting, and his ways gave me strength and encouraged me to share my story as well.  And then he shared more of his.  We've just kept feeding off of each other's strength these past few days.  There is such a deep emotional connection, so many things shared.  I have told him that I am independent and strong, and don't expect much help or good to come my way unless I make it happen on my own.  I have been a fighter, standing on my own. 

Iceman said it was time for that to change, that all I had to give was 50%, and I said I would try to back down some, lol.  ;)  In the candlelight tonight, he looked like Bruce Willis.  Hair cut very close to his head, smiling ice blue eyes, little smirk smile grin on his face.  He is muscular (yummy), about 5' 10", and get this, lol, he just bought a brand new Harley.  I swore I would never date a motorcycle dude.  He doesn't look like a "rough rider" or anything, just a boy with his toy.  But who says Moon doesn't go for the bad boys?  "Whatcha gonna do....?"  LOL

I can't believe this guy wants ME.  ME!  It hasn't hit me yet.  I am strangely calm tonight.  Is this what I've been waiting for?  OMG  I think I can look forward to my favorite time of the year now.  Birthday (his is 11/11 btw, I'm 11/14), Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Years.......Oh, thank goodness!

I need to go rest, what a night!   ;D    ;D    :-*   

~ Cindy
« Last Edit: November 07, 2007, 12:25:47 PM by MOONLIGHT1114 »
HIV+ since '93, 1/12 - CD4 785 and undet.   WOO-HOO!!

Offline Dragonette

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #33 on: November 07, 2007, 04:40:49 AM »
Oh, bliss  :D  :-*
"If you keep one foot in yesterday, and one in tomorrow, you piss all over today". Betty Tacy

tendai

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #34 on: November 07, 2007, 04:59:56 AM »
CINDY!!!!!!!!!YAY!!!GIRL IM SO HAPPY FOR YOU. THAT IS FANTASTIC OH MY GOSH!!!. i wish i could jump over there and give u great big hug!! yes! i'm really pleased for u! (my co-worker here thinks i'm crazy clapping hands all by myself). i'd do a happy dance if i was sure i wouldnt trip myself up. Of course he wants YOU!!! Wishing you more and more, u guys deserve each other

Queen - you too girl!!!!!! congrats on the undetectable.  and about Rico!! i'm sure u'll disclose when u're good and ready. who knows maybe he's got his own story to tell too. About the movie Philadelphia i never watched it. could u bring me up to speed and how its linked with Rico?

NY - i think what u did was best. like i said before some men will only hold us back and u dont need to take such shit from him.  i think u need to be with someone during these last few weeks, u know? . is there someone nearby who can be with u or whos at least a phonecall away?

Betty - how u feeling now? i hope u're better

Sara - your disclosure story was great.  yours and Cindy's stories make me feel theres hope after all. i'm really happy for you.  i'm draging my heels when it comes to bloodwork. my doctor had said 3-6 months. that was in June. i almost had then done in early October but they wanted too much money so i decided to wait till end of December. Or January. i really dont want to have them done, i'm scared to be told i have to start meds.

vivyt - hows the kids? i've always thought teachers deserve medals for patience. and fat paychecks coz lets face it you help to mould the new generation

cam- how u doing girl?

Drag- hows the premature alzheimer's  ;D ;) (just kidding). i do forget things too , especially when i got stress or too much on my mind

as for me i'm dipping a cowardly toe in the dating pool.  theres a guy who's expressed an 'interest'. he's 54! old enough to be my dad! says he's divorced. i dont know...

« Last Edit: November 07, 2007, 08:13:33 AM by tendai »

Offline Dragonette

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #35 on: November 07, 2007, 05:42:40 AM »
Drag- hows the premature alzheimer's  ;D ;) (just kidding). i do forget things too , especially when i got stress or too much on my mind

it's getting worse actually, yesterday we got home and it was stinking of gas, I had turned off the flame in the morning after making Shaun's ginseng concotion but left the gas on & leaking  :-\   :o . Luckily no one lit a cigarette otherwise I would not be writing this post.

I'll catch you later young lady...
"If you keep one foot in yesterday, and one in tomorrow, you piss all over today". Betty Tacy

Offline BT65

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #36 on: November 07, 2007, 08:14:34 AM »
OMG!  OMG!  Cin, I am soooooooo happy for you!  I knew he would be accepting.  And now he's disclosed something to you also that he was probably worried about.  And hey, he can only be better with a Harley! :D  I am kind of an "old biker."  I used to date a guy who was in a biker "club" (The Jokers) here.  That club was disbanded by the Hell's Henchman, who were disbanded by the Devil's Disciples etc......  But, getting back to the point, way to go!  If I were you, I would be in a celebrating mood!  Are you guys going to do anything this weekend to celebrate?  You should!  Go dancing or something.  I would definitely be on Cloud 9 right about now.  You go girl!

Queen, I'm not sitting in the judgement seat.  You disclose on your terms. You're making sure he's safe.  You'll know when it's time to disclose.  I'm just glad somebody around here is getting laid. :D

Viv, I don't know how you handle so many different personalities in the same room.  You must have loads of patience.  I don't know if I could last an hour with all those kids.  You are truly a blessing.

Ny, I would definitely be calling it quits right about now with Military Man.  He's just not worth all the extra emotions you're going through.  I know we all need to be needed, but not in that kind of way.  It sounds like everything has to be on his terms.  Well, that's not the way life is, especially when there's a new life involved.

SRM, about the bloodwork...... you just have to do it, if you want to remain healthy.  I know starting on meds is scarey, but you just have to look at it like they're saving your life.  And thank God they know so much more than what they used to.  Go on girl, get those vials drawn! :D

I am feeling more centered today.  Last night I met with my algebra teacher at the library.  Even though I met with her, it didn't make things a whole lot more clearer.  I felt like a total idiot, like I should know this stuff.  She told me though, that teachers look at how much a student is trying, besides having the work right.  She's a very nice person.  She gave me a hug when she came into the library and told me she would like to keep in touch with me after this class ends.  I have to remember it's been 30 years since I've taken algebra.  Even then, they did things so much different than what they do now.  Cin, I sure could use your brains here! :D  Too bad we don't all live closer to each other.   You know the truth is, I always need some deep-seated reason for things, and in algebra there is no rhyme or reason to how to get the answers.  They are worked out they way they are, just because they are.  It's like when I got into recovery, they say "it's a simple program for complicated people."  And I think that's how I am-complicated.  I did so well in my philosophy class, and in my psychology classes, because there's always that search for a reason.  And that's the way I like it.

Today is a new day.  Yesterday was a rough one for me.  I felt like a failure, like I should be able to handle anything I take on.  Today, I know that I can handle what I'm supposed to handle.  And right now, that's the algebra and the Child and Adolescent Psychology, which btw, is a tough class also.  So right now I've got all I can handle.  But hey, next week is the 1/2 way point for these classes.  Having eight-week long classes is hard, because there's still all the work of a 15-week semester crammed into them.  But I'm trying to see it for good, telling myself how fast the classes go by. 

As for that nasty fungal thing (the yeast) I'm sure it's caused from the antibiotics I was prescribed for the sinus/chest thing.  I called my doc yesterday and told the receptionist "I can go to the drugstore and pick up something for this, but it sure would help me out financially if Dr. Z. could call something in."  So she talked to him and told me they would call in some Diflucan.  I need to go pick that up and get started on it.   I wonder why, btw, the companies have to make things that women need (kits to clear up the yeast, tampons etc) so expensive?!  That's such a rip-off and an extra burden.  OK, I'm starting to turn melodramatic again.

I hope all you ladies have a nice day.  I'm going to check out a few more threads and eat breakfast and get started with a new day.

Edited to add:  Congratulations Queen on the undetectable viral load!  Yipee!
« Last Edit: November 07, 2007, 11:49:06 AM by Bettytacy »
I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

tendai

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #37 on: November 07, 2007, 08:24:28 AM »

it's getting worse actually, yesterday we got home and it was stinking of gas, I had turned off the flame in the morning after making Shaun's ginseng concotion but left the gas on & leaking

Drag now thats scary!! really..please be more careful!!

Offline MOONLIGHT1114

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #38 on: November 07, 2007, 12:54:11 PM »
Hi GFs~

I am not jumping around today, still calm, kinda like when you know Christmas is coming but you've still got to wait?  That's how I feel.  I just can't believe this is happening, yep, I'm suffering the "too good to be true" thing.  This man wants to take care of me.  He wants me to meet his sister and friends.  He doesn't want to wait until next week to see me.  He has his girls this weekend, so he is going see me Thursday night.   :P  Already I've told him I feel bad that he keeps driving so far to see me, but in a few weeks he'll be close by in his new home.  I wonder if he'll let Cheech come over and visit, too?

Tendai, I started laughing and smiling when I read your post!  LOL  Just do a mean chair dance for me, GF, but don't knock yourself out!  Glad you posted, I was thinking about you last night.  :)

Drag~  Oh goodness!  You left the gas on?  I am such a chicken shit, I have never lit a match in my life, always hated using gas stoves at friend's homes, and to this day have not started a grill outside for cooking.  I am afraid I will blow my ass up.  Hopefully, you're on high alert now to cover your tracks and be careful!  If you didn't post again, I don't know what we would do here!

BT~ Please don't feel like a failure.  I have learned that getting older with this virus, I have to slow the hell down and be gentle on myself.  I still don't know how I'm going to be able to get up early and work at a new job.  I keep telling myself I'll get up early "tomorrow" and it doesn't happen.  Crap.  Plus, you are taking classes.  I never worked and took classes at the same time, and I was 17 and HIV- back then.  I just knew better than to push myself so hard.  Yeah, its kind of sexy that Iceman has a Harley, but he might need something more powerful than 1500cc's in between his legs!  LOL   :o   ;D  Give me time!  Its different, being so open with him, I could've done the nasty last night, np, but I have been taking it slow, and he is respectful of that.  Ah, like Drag said, "Bliss."  Its nice to be respected by a man for more than just being a hole in one, you know?

Iceman sent me a sweet email today, it really made me think.  He wrote: "If I had to dream of a partner that was everything a man wanted, it would completely pale in comparison to the girl I have met. Cindy, I believe I met you for a reason, and in time more will be revealed."

Ok, lots of mush there, and I had better wake up already.  There's a great man who wants to be part of my life now.  As far as the Hep, he is undetectable, did the treatment about 1-1/2 years ago.  Amazing since he's prob had Hep since the 80s, and had two kids during that time too.  How could they have missed diagnosing it for so long? Wish I looked as healthy as him!   :P

I have a phone interview today at 3pm, so I need to get ready for that.  I said I would get out and take Cheech for a hike, but its cloudy here today.  Besides, Cheech is content, laying on the floor behind me sleeping.  Such a good doggie!  I would cry to Cheech last spring after Casie passed, and I would tell him, don't leave Mommie until a good man comes along to take over your job!  Can't help but be a little nervous with Iceman around now, don't want to lose my Cheech!  He is 13yrs 9mos now.  :)

~ Cindy
HIV+ since '93, 1/12 - CD4 785 and undet.   WOO-HOO!!

Offline Queen Tokelove

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #39 on: November 07, 2007, 12:58:28 PM »
OMG OMG OMG, I am so happy for you Cindy. I was skipping over posts just to see how your night went. And then to find out he has Hep, oh wow. Not saying it's great that he has it but he can truly relate to you. I am totally speechless I am so fucking happy for you. Ok, I may need to roll one just to calm the hell down... ;D It's onward and upwards for you, gf, now if the job comes, you will be set!!!!!!

Tendai-- Girl, I was wondering what happened to you. Blink and you're here... ;)

Betty--- Sorry you had to quit your job but your health is more important. I'm glad that your teacher is working with you with the algebra. I just want you to get better and will be sending healing vibes your way.

NY-- Now you see what I meant by my last post regarding Mr. Military. I know you are feeling pretty down but girl, cut your losses with this guy. If you're going to put any energy into him then use it to make sure he mans up on his responsibilities to your child. You see he isn't going to do it and he still is about playing games. Put your energies towards bringing this new baby into this world. You need a man not a boy in your life. And that man will come when you least expect it. It's time to do YOU.

Dragonette--- You ok over there? You're getting me worried a bit with the forgetfulness and the stuff about the gas being on. Please be more careful.

Sara--- I don't know how I missed what you are going through. I know getting on meds can be a scary thing but they are here to help. I was worried about side effects and all that stuff. But look at the alternative if you don't, is what I am saying here. Your body can only do so much against this virus. I was blessed enough to make it 10 years without meds but realized that my body needs help. Starting the meds doesn't mean it's the end. Just think about it is what I am saying here.

Ok, it's getting time for me to wind this up. Cable guy is suppose to be coming out here to check my wireless connection then Rico is suppose to be stopping over later. Before I go, I just wanted to thank you all for being understanding towards me concerning my disclosure with Rico. I appreciate the support. Just know that I will disclose to him. I am just waiting for the right time to do so. Much love and big hugs to you all...... :-*
Started Atripla/Ziagen on 9/13/07.
10/31/07 CD4-265 VL- undetectable
2/6/08 CD4- 401 VL- undetectable
5/7/08 CD4- 705 VL- undetectable
6/4/08 CD4- 775 VL- undetectable
8/6/08 CD4- 805 VL- undetectable
11/13/08 CD4- 774 VL--undetectable
2/4/09  CD4- 484  VL- 18,000 (2 months off meds)
3/3/09---Starting Back on Meds---
4/27/09 CD4- 664 VL-- undetectable
6/17/09 CD4- 438 VL- 439
8/09 CD4- 404 VL- 1,600
01-22-10-- CD4- 525 VL- 59,000
Cherish the simple things life has to offer

The Royal Blog

Offline srmn98

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #40 on: November 07, 2007, 01:14:23 PM »
Hi Everybody,

Whew hewwww ..... good news from the Iceman, Cindy !!!!   I was so excited when I read your post. :)   People can be so amazing, huh ?

Queen and Betty ... oops, sorry for any confusion. I'm not starting meds .... I'm just scared to get my bloodwork. The whole story is actually that they think I might be a Long Term Non Progressor because I have never shown a viral load and have never been on meds. But I'm scared every time I go in for bloodwork that my numbers are gonna crash. I'll never know I guess. So that's the background .... when I said I'm scared of what they will tell me next, I meant that the last time I got scary news it was that I was unexpectedly HIV positive.

I'll have to write my whole story one of these days ... but it's not really a dating thread story.

OK ... more later. :)

Sara

Offline MOONLIGHT1114

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #41 on: November 07, 2007, 02:53:21 PM »
Sara~  EVERY story is a Dating Thread story, but if you'd like....post in "By Way of Introduction"  All of our stories with diagnosis and past lives are in there..... :)

Gotta go!  Phone interview time!

~ Cindy

HIV+ since '93, 1/12 - CD4 785 and undet.   WOO-HOO!!

Offline Dragonette

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #42 on: November 07, 2007, 03:16:05 PM »
Hola chicas,

I am really happy and chilled today - wonder if it's b/c Cindy's taken care of?  ;) I know, I can be very forgetful, when i called myself a scatterbrain I wasn't exaggurating. Anyway the good thing is I can watch the same movie 4-5 times and still be surprised.

I have nothing special to report. I still get that Christmas feeling you talk about Cin (even though i don't celebrate Christmas). I still can't believe it sometimes. Between this stress and that stress I realize I am happy, unless there is some drqmatic event or anxiety gets a hold on me. It is possible to be sad and happy at once and I have a feeling you have finally found a partner to enable all those things, a really well rounded character, I like him already (casting Bruce Willis in my mind).

Sara, I have never been scared of blood draws until I started getting detectable while on meds. but I tell myself better find out so you can do something about it, and luckily you're in a position to do a lot about it.

Betty, hope youť better with the cough and all. Did you see the doctor?  :-*

Queen, enjoy your evening, enjoy Rico, but please be careful (not talking about sex but emotion).

NY, I am so sorry you had to be disappointed again. I know things will be better when the little one will be here and you will not be so pregnant anymore. (((hug)))

Have a a peaceful cozy evening everyone, and good luck with math problems/job hunting/guy handling...

"If you keep one foot in yesterday, and one in tomorrow, you piss all over today". Betty Tacy

Offline Nygurl225

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #43 on: November 07, 2007, 03:44:56 PM »
Hi ladies!

Well, I went through my emotional breakdown last night. Slept like shit and cried my eyes out, and although I'm still a bit sad today I think it's time to move on. I usually have a tendancy to force myself to just smile and push through things like this but I think I really needed to just break down last night. It wasn't all about Mr. Military. I think his actions just put me over the edge so to speak. I think my total breakdown was a combo of all the BS I have been through in the past few months. Starting with Mr. Militarys cheating ways, to my pregnancy, diagnosis and ending once again with Militarys BS. But I allowed myself to cry, vent and just lose it. Now it's time to move on.

On to a new issue. My dissability insurance. They just informed me that they may not cover me just yet because there technically is still 4 weeks before my due date and they normaly don't pay for maternity leave until two weeks before your due date. Problem is my job is very physically demanding. I guess I have two choices, find another source of income or go back to work (which will be hell). So now it's time to put the old BS behind me and take on the new BS. Just gotta keep moving foward girls! 

Thanks for all your words of support. I'm off to jump back into the real world and do some school work. Time to get my shit together and stop letting the actions of others hold me back. I hope everyone is doing well. I'll be back later!

Offline Queen Tokelove

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #44 on: November 07, 2007, 04:42:37 PM »
Just jumping in real quick before Rico gets here. I leave the door open downstairs or he calls to tell me he is on his way. So, I have a little time to comment here and there.

NY- I know what you mean about the BS, it all builds up and then there is a flood. I am the same way. Yep, it is time to move on to better and brighter things, just keep that in mind.

Sara-- I guess I just went from Betty's post, sorry about that. Well, blood work isn't that bad, sounds like you are doing good. Why not be proactive about your health instead of waiting for the shoe to drop. Even if you weren't poz, your health is a good thing to keep an eye on.

Dragonette-- You are on point with my emotions because I am really starting to like Rico. I am keeping them in check til I can talk further with him about things. I like to know where a person's mind is on things just not disclosure. But I do enjoy his company.

That's it for now, will check back in later.
Started Atripla/Ziagen on 9/13/07.
10/31/07 CD4-265 VL- undetectable
2/6/08 CD4- 401 VL- undetectable
5/7/08 CD4- 705 VL- undetectable
6/4/08 CD4- 775 VL- undetectable
8/6/08 CD4- 805 VL- undetectable
11/13/08 CD4- 774 VL--undetectable
2/4/09  CD4- 484  VL- 18,000 (2 months off meds)
3/3/09---Starting Back on Meds---
4/27/09 CD4- 664 VL-- undetectable
6/17/09 CD4- 438 VL- 439
8/09 CD4- 404 VL- 1,600
01-22-10-- CD4- 525 VL- 59,000
Cherish the simple things life has to offer

The Royal Blog

Offline emeraldize

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #45 on: November 07, 2007, 07:32:14 PM »
The whole story is actually that they think I might be a Long Term Non Progressor because I have never shown a viral load and have never been on meds. But I'm scared every time I go in for bloodwork that my numbers are gonna crash.

Sara,

If you are an LTNP, and the pro's at NIH seem to make this assessment earlier than the 8-10 years that was the proof standard, I hope you'll contact Bruce Walker's program at MGH to see if you can participate. You'll either be an Elite (which is likely since you described never having shown a viral load) or a Viremic Controller based on numbers/duration.   

And the fear thing, or intense concern is perhaps more accurate, is part of being an LTNP--perfectly normal and understandable. There are no guarantees so you will always wonder if this is the time your numbers will go south.

Just keep doing whatever the doc wants, quarterlies or every six months. You may be able to negotiate getting your results over the phone and then skipping appointments if your team realizes you're being responsible. It's sort of a reward to you and to them as they can usually fill the slot with another patient. That's how I approach it...I tell them I'd prefer to give my appointment to someone who needs it more than I. Consequently, I'm on a six-month face-to-face with my ID doc.

I urge you to get involved in research as it helps favorably offset the regular wonder-if-it's-this-time quarterly head vise.

Em
« Last Edit: November 08, 2007, 07:09:08 AM by emeraldize »

Offline cjc

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #46 on: November 07, 2007, 08:37:09 PM »
Hello ladies. Em, I see you posted but didn't say how you are doing. Hope you are well.     Betty, sorry you had to quit your job but that sounds like the best move for you. Try for a couple shifts a week  when you get to feeling better. ML , glad your disclosure went so well .  Queen , hope yours goes as well. Glad ya'll are  finding love.  I am okay. Yes, when we do parties larger than 8 we automatically 18%.  Work is going well, picking up and I have decided not to date my negative friend. Nice guy, just can't do it.  My brother is going home next week,I can hang til then.   Hope everyone is well. Later, Cristy

Offline vivyt

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #47 on: November 07, 2007, 08:41:19 PM »
Cindy...CONGRATULATIONS! Everything does work out for the best... :)

Offline BT65

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #48 on: November 07, 2007, 10:22:22 PM »
Good evening ladies:

Sara, I misunderstood.  I thought you were worried about going on meds.  Blood draws are at the most inconvenient for my anymore.  I wish someone would come over and do it so I wouldn't have to go to the lab and wait, but I know they're needed to see how my body's doing.  I remember one time they took out 16 vials.  There were three different doctors that needed tests.

Em, good to see you posting again!  How are you doing?  Anything new going on?

As for me, I went to my Child & Adolescent Psychology class tonight.  I like that class better than the algebra.  We were talking about brain injuries.  Well, when I went into the coma (from having a bladder infection where the poison got into my bloodstream) I flatlined.  I was "gone" for a few minutes, as the decision was being made to use the paddles to revive me.  Then the last relationship I was in, the guy pushed me down a flight of stairs and I ended up pretty messed up.  I don't know if this caused permanent damage or not.  If it did, that could be the explanation as to why I don't get algebra (the left side of the brain controls math/logic and that might have been damaged).  I mean, the teacher can show me how to solve a problem and I don't understand it when it's right in front of me.  I suppose I will talk to my doctor when I see him on the 28th.  Speaking of labs...... I need to get some drawn.  Guess that's on my to-do list for tomorrow. 

Nothing exciting going on.  Just thought I'd check in.  Hope everyone has a pleasant evening.
I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

Offline confusedme

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #49 on: November 07, 2007, 10:38:54 PM »
Viv, you are a brave, underpaid woman. Bless you girl. You have way more patience than I do.

Sara, I'm jealous. I wish I could come up with the cash for a color. My roots are 3 inches long. I haven't had a color since February. I totally understand about the appointments. If mine weren't set before I leave, I would never go. The first one was set up through the pregnancy clinic or I wouldn't have made that one either. My next (second) appointment is in two weeks. I am so nervous.

NY, sorry you got disappointed by your guy. I'm with ya girl. Men suck.

Cindy, thanks for that song. I love it.
Weak and queasy?  Weren't you turning in early a few nights ago, too?  Are you OK? 
Yes, I have turned in early a lot lately. That is very strange for me because I am usually such a night person. I'm not sure what is going on with me but being so new to all this I automatically think the worst. I'm so tired of feeling this way.

OMG! I am so happy for you. I never would have thought telling someone could go so well. Be on cloud 9 girl. You deserve to float.

Betty, my first thought was to tell you that you are not a failure because you are not. You sound so much like me. I am constantly using the words "failure" and "stupid". I hold standards way high for myself and from reading your post it sounds like you do to. BTW, I don't get algebra either, even when they explain it really slow and I have never had a head trauma.

Nothing major going on here. I felt better today physically but still not what I call great. I'll check in later.

Editted for Queen. I am so sorry I missed your news yesterday. Undetectable! I am so happy for you. I hope all goes well with Rico tonight. I will be looking for details tomorrow.
« Last Edit: November 07, 2007, 10:41:26 PM by confusedme »
08/13/07 - Diagnosis confirmed
08/30/07 - T-cells 400, VL 6,500 (Baseline)
11/30/07 - T-cells 428, VL 9,950

Offline BT65

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #50 on: November 08, 2007, 08:13:40 AM »
Good morning ladies-

Wow, it was quiet on here yesterday compared to the day before. 

Queen, I'm anxiously awaiting to hear how your night with Rico went!  Please don't keep us in suspense too long.

Today is another new day.  I have to go out and buy my cat some food and litter.  Other than that, I'm going to look at the questions I have in algebra and see if I can figure them out one more time.  Whatever I can't, I'm going to take to class tonight.  We're having our first test in there, and I just want to pass it.  Please, ladies, send positive energy my way!  Have a good day ladies-
I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

Offline vivyt

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #51 on: November 08, 2007, 08:44:41 AM »
Hello everyone! Sounds like things are running smoothly for everyone. Queen- I did not congratulate you on being undetectable. I am a little confused what that means though. Does that mean that the virus does not show up? I think I need some help understanding... :)

Someone asked me what grade I taught (I think it was Cindy) I teach 5th grade. It's a really great age.

That's all for now. Have a good day!

Offline MOONLIGHT1114

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #52 on: November 08, 2007, 11:36:03 AM »
Hi GFs~

The power company was in my neighborhood yesterday and somehow they messed up my computer service.  I was trying to sign in last night and it was worse than dial-up!  The web pages wouldn't load.  I live in the first house on my court and the power company needed to get inside the power box in my front yard, which is for all of the houses on my side of the street.  When I moved here 14 years ago, I could see the 3 foot square power box, but not anymore.  I have Canadian cypress trees, about four of them, which have grown to 15 feet tall around the power box.  Yesterday I hear a chainsaw going and I look outside and see that I can see across the street.  Two of the trees had been cut down and were laying in my side yard!  I guess they "cut my curb appeal" but at least I didn't have to do the work.  I'm calling HOA today if these jokers don't get out here and haul the trees away soon!

I see Iceman tonight.  He is coming by around 6pm or so and bringing us dinner.  I told him he didn't have to, but he is insisting.  He has come to see me every two days since our first date last Friday.  I am starting to get giddy!

Viv~  having an "undetectable viral load" or "VL" means that when your blood is drawn, there is so little virus in your blood that they call it undetectable.  The most sensitive lab test that they can do is called an "ultrasensitive" and I think its called "RNA by PCR."  It measures if your VL is below 50 (and now 48 on some tests, I hear).  If you are below 50, then you are undetectable.  Less virus, less chance for a suppressed immune system and infections.  Keep in mind that NO, it does not mean the virus is gone from your body.  #1 - It is measuring the VL in your blood, when you could have higher levels in your vaginal secretions and breast milk, etc.  Also #2 - Your test can come back undetectable, but you may have 49 copies or 2 copies of the virus (per mL, I believe) in your blood, so the virus is still there. 

I'll go to  the Lessons area here and try to post a link for you.  Undetectable is what we all strive for because it means better health and control over the virus, but again, it is NOT gone from your body.

http://www.aidsmeds.com/articles/BloodTest_5030.shtml


Hi BT~  I hope you are feeling better.  Sounds like you have an easy day that you can take at your own pace.  I'm glad to read that.  You know I always think about you and that math, lol, so I'll send good thoughts your way!  Wish I lived closer, I would tutor you and then we could rock out to Priest or something!   :D  I'm still in awe every time I read about your experience flatlining.  Gheez that seems so surreal.  I bet you don't remember much of it, or do you?  Deep stuff.

CM~ Don't think the worst because you are tired.  Just listen to your body and be sure to keep up with your labs.  Like I told Drag, the thing I have learned to do with this virus is to slow the hell down.  I find that I stay close to home  A LOT, because I don't want to be an hour's drive away and be exhausted.  I like to stay in my comfort zone.

Cristy~ I can't recall but does your neg friend know your status?  I believe you know him from work?  It was nerve-wracking for me when I started dating after my husband died, and the thing that I knew I had to get control over the most was this......I had to just go out with someone if I liked him because I owed it to myself to be happy, but I also had to have the mental strength to not let my demons distract me while on the date.  I just pushed myself, and it wasn't easy.  Sometimes I would return home after a date and think, "Wow, he was nice...." and it would be so bittersweet.  I knew that he and I would see each other again, and then after a few dates I would disclose.  Yes, lots of times they couldn't deal with the HIV and things ended, but what I got from dating was inner-strength.  I won't deny that it was very emotional, but I would just tell myself, its not me, its him and his ignorance.  Some dates stuck around for awhile, wanting to learn more about the virus, so it was a chance for me to educate them and make them more aware.

It has always been a tough climb, as my last LTR ended because he was scared (after 2-1/2 years), but look where I am now.  Just look.  All of the emotions and soul-searching and perseverance very well may have paid off for me with Iceman.  I would always push myself to date because I believed there was strength in numbers.  The more dates you have, the more social you are/become, which is healthy.  Also, the more dates, the better the chance that you will find someone that you connect with who appreciates you for YOU.

I know easier said than done, but hey Match.com made money off of me, and I feel I got stronger through pushing myself and dealing with those crazy emotions when I was rejected.

Hi Em~  Good advice about Sara possibly being a LTNP.  We have a woman in our support group and she says she is progressing so slowly after 12 years, that the snails are passing her by!  She has yet to go on meds.  I've been on meds since '95, about 2 years into my diagnosis, and I wouldn't have it any other way if this is what it takes.  I have been undetectable for a long time, and the meds have been worth it for me.  When I was diagnosed I said, "This virus is not going to get me."  The little bugger!   :D

Hi Queen~  I was trying to get online last night to chat before you saw Rico.  Not sure if my IMs made it to you or not.  I'm thinking you haven't disclosed yet, but rather you're "feeling him out"  ;)  to see how he takes everything.  Any progress?  I am still thinking something is up with him, like maybe he knows someone who is pos, knows you are pos, or is pos himself.  The reference to the Philly movie isn't something people just bring up every day.  Let us know what's going on.

Also, Tendai, you wanted to know about the movie "Philadelphia."  You can google it with Tom Hanks.  It came out in the early 90s and was very depressing.  It shows the life of a man with AIDS during the early part of the epidemic, before we had the meds we do today.  Tom Hanks went to court and was fighting against discrimination, I believe.  Its very moving and sad.

More later, GFs, have a great day!

~ Cindy
« Last Edit: November 09, 2007, 10:13:11 AM by MOONLIGHT1114 »
HIV+ since '93, 1/12 - CD4 785 and undet.   WOO-HOO!!

Offline Queen Tokelove

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #53 on: November 08, 2007, 12:25:45 PM »
Hi Ladies---

Rico just left after I made him a cd with some Spanish music on it. He came over last night went home and then came back a bit later. You are right Cindy, I am still feeling him out and didn't have the chance actually to discuss anything. I'm still working on it but am trying to get to know other things about him too. It was a nice night, plans have been made for Saturday with confirmation on the day of.

Thanks, Cindy for the definition on what undetectable means. I am really surprised that I became undetectable so fast. The highest my vl had ever been was 85,000 but my body knocked it down to 16,590 before starting meds. Now less than 50 of those little buggers. I am definitely feeling better and has more energy. I got a call from the pharmacy today, I think they may have gotten my Atripla in, I will have to give them a call. It seems you have been having more problems with your power and stuff lately, Cindy, what's up with that? And what is the Iceman bringing for din din? :D

Good Luck today, Betty with the algebra. I know I had to get some litter and food for the crew here the other day but since we are working with 4 cats, we get big bags of food and multi cat litter, man can they blow a litter box up..... :o I have been seeing fur around the house, so that tells me a few of the boys have been fighting or Lucifer has been at Princess Polly's booty again... ;D I swear she puts up a helluva fight against Lucifer because he never seems to give up, the other cats don't even try anymore after getting swatted a few times by her.

I think today I will truly just rest and relax. Do a bit of house cleaning a bit later. I'll check in later...
Started Atripla/Ziagen on 9/13/07.
10/31/07 CD4-265 VL- undetectable
2/6/08 CD4- 401 VL- undetectable
5/7/08 CD4- 705 VL- undetectable
6/4/08 CD4- 775 VL- undetectable
8/6/08 CD4- 805 VL- undetectable
11/13/08 CD4- 774 VL--undetectable
2/4/09  CD4- 484  VL- 18,000 (2 months off meds)
3/3/09---Starting Back on Meds---
4/27/09 CD4- 664 VL-- undetectable
6/17/09 CD4- 438 VL- 439
8/09 CD4- 404 VL- 1,600
01-22-10-- CD4- 525 VL- 59,000
Cherish the simple things life has to offer

The Royal Blog

Offline MOONLIGHT1114

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #54 on: November 08, 2007, 02:34:33 PM »
NY~I wanted to know how you're doing today?  I think emotional breakdowns are a good thing, in the sense that you can let all of that pressure out.  You're right, it just builds up.  I am the type to smile and trudge onward, too, but when a time comes and I get overwhelmed and teary, I just have at it.  I was crying my eyes out Monday night, thinking about my dog that died 6 months ago, thinking about disclosing to Iceman, thinking about being unemployed 6 months and just being tired of this allergy crap that has been running me down still.  I even worry about Cheech being so old and passing, he has been a Godsend ever since my husband died in '96.

So, yes, lots of crazy crap, and sometimes you just owe it to yourself to let it out!

You wrote about returning to a physically demanding job and it looks like you would only have to do that for two weeks before your due date.  Can you swing it by trying?  Can you swing it financially by staying home and off of your feet?  What are you doing now for work?  I was a little unclear as to where you were.  Check in and let us know.

One thing that was evident in your post is that you are a fighter, and that even in the face of crap, you know what the right thing to do is.  Be grateful to yourself for that, for pushing yourself to get better things for yourself, whether its a job, an education, friends, a better man in your life......You are a trooper, GF.  Hang in there!

Queen~ The electric company and the cable company are colaborating to do some updates in the hood here.  So, this is why the cable has gone out some days, also why it went out in the middle of the 8th during the World Series, and then yesterday, the internet thing.  There were power trucks all lined up in the neighborhood last night when I got back around 7pm, so they were checking the grids in all of the power boxes.  I have to see if they moved the trees that they cut down.  I am thinking that they are waiting until their work is done.  I will prob call HOA tonight or tomorrow.

Oh, and Iceman wants to take me out to dinner.  I refused, but he insisted and told me to let him be in control, joking of course, since that what that horoscope thing said!  So, hey its a date night!  He also said he would watch Cheech for three weeks if I get a job that requires training in Richmond, VA.  Now, THAT speaks volumes right there!  Whew, I think I am getting hooked.....

~ Cindy
« Last Edit: November 08, 2007, 02:40:42 PM by MOONLIGHT1114 »
HIV+ since '93, 1/12 - CD4 785 and undet.   WOO-HOO!!

Offline vivyt

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #55 on: November 08, 2007, 11:22:00 PM »
Thank you for the explanation. When I was diagnosed in May I became very sick shortly after. I found out that my blood count was 15...scary. I went on Atripla shortly after that and have been on it ever since. My last numbers, which I do not know exactly, were BC of 80 something and a viral load of around 400 something. I just had more blood work 1 week ago and I have to make an appointment so I am kind of looking forward to finding out where I am at.

On a different note...I know I have said this before but I will say it again, I may not be actively dating right now but you all give me hope. I am so happy that you ladies are able to find someone who is willing to accept the whole package. You go girls! So, until I meet the one for me I will cheer you all on... :) :)

Offline BT65

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #56 on: November 08, 2007, 11:40:04 PM »
Good evening ladies-

Wow, I'm up at this hour (11:35 p.m.), which is late for me.  I'm usually out by this time.   I wonder what's going on with my "biological clock." 

Algebra wasn't so bad tonight.  It's much easier to do things in class with the teacher there, but we're all meeting Sunday at 4:00 at the library.  I'm so glad I have a teacher who wants to work with us so we don't fail. 

Cin, girl, you better get on those people's asses about your power!  That would be such a pain, not knowing when the power would go out.  Where did you and Iceman go for dinner?  I am so happy for you.

Queen, you just keep on keeping on, gf. 

My doctor did prescribe me Diflucan for the yeast thing.  So that's on the way out.  I'm so glad.  It's so bothering to be itching in public where I can't do anything about it!  Other than that, really nothing going on.  Just thought I'd check in.  I'll probably go read my book, which is an excellent read.  It's Eric Clapton's autobiography.  Cin, you might really enjoy it if you like Eric Clapton.  It talks all about him developing his guitar skills, his addiction, his relationships etc.  There's a chapter in there about his son that died, which I haven't gotten to yet.  And a chapter about the treatment center he has. It's really interesting.  I also got a 40th anniversary edition of Rolling Stone in the mail today (I subscribe to it).  So there's a lot of reading to do. 

Tomorrow I'm going to take my car to get the oil changed, the transmission flushed and the radiator flushed.  Then next Friday I'm going to get it tuned up.  Hope everyone's having a good night! 
I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

Offline MOONLIGHT1114

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #57 on: November 09, 2007, 10:30:47 AM »
Hi GFs~  Just checking in this morning.  My power has never gone out, but because the power company is messing with lines in the hood, it has messed with the cable a few times.  So, my TV and internet have been affected some, not too bad yet.  I called HOA bec the cypress trees are still laying out front, and it turns out a lot of people have called.  I am sure most are probably pissed that their trees got cut down, but then again I'm sure its in the hood by-laws that we have to keep access to the power boxes clear or else.  So, hey I got the "or else" via chainsaw the other morning.  Better them than me doing the grunt work.  Now if they could have only pruned the tree on the side of my house.  Its taller than my 3-story townhouse, its about 40 feet tall and small branches are reaching out over the roof!  Some dumbshit who lived here in the 80s planted the damn tree 6 FEET away from my home!  The trunk is about 14 inches in diameter so whenever its windy the branches scratch on the siding on the side of my home.

Iceman took me to Carrabba's last night for Italian.  He didn't finish his dinner so I get chicken parmagana for lunch today!   :D  We got seated at this huge booth with room for six, and he decided to come over and sit next to me on my side for dinner, very sweet.

Ice knows I love chocolate so he bought me a yummy Cadbury bar which I'm sure I will devour in one sitting today, lol!  He also brought me a t-shirt from his company, which is in the automotive industry.  The back of it says "You're only as safe as your rubber," meaning your tires!  LMAO  I got a kick out of that!   ;)

OK, I need help girls.  Iceman has a birthday on Sunday, 11/11 and we will celebrate next week.  I'm not sure if he's getting me anything, but I want to do a little something for him.  WHAT do you get a guy that you just met?  He is very health-conscious, so I don't think I can get him chocolate or something like he got me, but maybe.  Maybe I could bake or order a birthday cake for the two of us? 

But what about a gift?  Can you all throw some ideas out there?  I'll be at the mall tomorrow with mom getting my hair done, so I could get him something.  Maybe cologne or a shirt?  I don't know......crap.  I have no damn money, but this man has fed me 4 times in the past week, has brought me a battery back-up for my computer, as well as the chocolate and t-shirt.  He is a giver, and so am I.  Its his birthday for goodness sake!  I think I WILL order a cake for us, but I have to ponder a gift. 

~Cindy
HIV+ since '93, 1/12 - CD4 785 and undet.   WOO-HOO!!

Offline Nygurl225

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #58 on: November 09, 2007, 11:17:38 AM »
Hi Ladies!

Cin~ Thanks for your concern. I'm comming along. Still kind of down but I'm getting through it. Your right I am a fighter, I take great pride in that. I will get over this hurdle just as I have the others in my life. But it's not easy emotionally. sfar as Ice, hmmm it's hard buying a gift for someone you just met. I love to cook and i'm always a fan of cooking a really nice dinner for someone. If you know his style maybe a shirt or something is a good idea. I'm bad at this myself sorry I couldn't help more.

To the rest of you ladies i hope all is well. I have an apt with the doctor soon so I have to keep this short and sweet.  I hope everyone is doing well today. My thoughts are with you all. I wish everyone a great day and hopefully the bumps in the road of life arent too big today!!

As for me, I'm just trying to get by. I have a sonogram today and I'm depresed, not very excited at all. I just want to get everything over and done with. school work will occupy the rest of my day. Nothing too exciting. I'll be back later on. I'M OUT!!

Offline srmn98

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #59 on: November 09, 2007, 02:30:51 PM »
hmmmmm...... gifts.

off the top of my head:

1. massage oil and a massage ;)
2. tickets to something you can do together ....  move, play, show, etc.
3. flowers / house plant .... i think men like them.
4. something for his car for when he drives back and forth to see you ... so he's more comfortable .... could be a coffee mug, some music, funny air freshener, etc.


I say bake him a cake !!  Cupcakes are always good too because you can decorate them all differently and send some home with him so he has cake all week. :)

s

Offline Dragonette

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Offline Queen Tokelove

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #61 on: November 09, 2007, 04:55:18 PM »
Sorry, Cindy...I don't have any idea on what you can get Iceman.... :(
Started Atripla/Ziagen on 9/13/07.
10/31/07 CD4-265 VL- undetectable
2/6/08 CD4- 401 VL- undetectable
5/7/08 CD4- 705 VL- undetectable
6/4/08 CD4- 775 VL- undetectable
8/6/08 CD4- 805 VL- undetectable
11/13/08 CD4- 774 VL--undetectable
2/4/09  CD4- 484  VL- 18,000 (2 months off meds)
3/3/09---Starting Back on Meds---
4/27/09 CD4- 664 VL-- undetectable
6/17/09 CD4- 438 VL- 439
8/09 CD4- 404 VL- 1,600
01-22-10-- CD4- 525 VL- 59,000
Cherish the simple things life has to offer

The Royal Blog

Offline BT65

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #62 on: November 09, 2007, 06:22:00 PM »
Good evening ladies:

Cin, it looks like you have some good ideas.  Luv the Harley site, btw!  Do you have a local Harley shop maybe you could pick him up something at?  That's always good, especially for the "new biker."  Like the cupcake idea also.  What creative minds you ladies have!  Oh, I absolutely love Carraba's.  They are the bomb as far as Italian food goes.

Well, last night I bit into something and one of the front teeth on my upper denture came out.  And I couldn't get into see a dentist until Monday.  So, this weekend I just have to try not to smile too big! :D 

Sunday, I'm getting a new computer.  My brother's girlfriend is on the Geek Squad at Best Buy.  So I went there today and she's getting me one at her cost.  The one I have now is a Windows 98 and a big old thing.  One of my friends gave it to me (the whole set-up) so I'm not complaining.  But I sure will be glad to get a new one.  Maybe then I'll feel more up-to-date. :)

Other than that, I got my car thing done today.  I also bought myself a down quilt at Meijer's.  I've been wanting one, so today I finally got one.  I hope all you ladies are having a good evening. 
I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

Offline Winiroo

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #63 on: November 09, 2007, 07:54:50 PM »
You could give him a framed photo of yourself...


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Offline vivyt

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #64 on: November 09, 2007, 08:41:36 PM »
Maybe you can make him some dinner and a cake.

Offline MOONLIGHT1114

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #65 on: November 09, 2007, 09:55:02 PM »
Hi GFs~

Thanks for all of the great suggestions!  Iceman suggested that he come over Sunday night after he drops his girls off.  Sunday IS his birthday.  I am so afraid that if I bake a cake it won't turn out right, lol!  I am crazy about bakery cakes that are decorated brightly, so maybe I'll go buy one tomorrow.  I've thought about a framed picture as well, but Iceman has already put pics of me on his desk at work!

I would love to cook him dinner, but I don't even have a table to eat at, isn't that awful.  Doofus took all of his stuff after we split last December.  I DO like the idea of giving him a little something that he can keep in his car or with him to remind him of me......

Thanks for the ideas!

On a sad note, my GF had to put her dog down this evening.  I called her on Weds to wish her a Happy Bday and she had just found out that it was time for her 12yo dog to go.  He had skin cancer.  Makes me sad, but Molson is up there at Rainbow Bridge with my Casie Girl now.   :'(

~ Cindy
HIV+ since '93, 1/12 - CD4 785 and undet.   WOO-HOO!!

Offline Queen Tokelove

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #66 on: November 09, 2007, 09:56:32 PM »
You could give him a framed photo of yourself...

LMAO....I think he has that taken care of....Cindy knows what I mean.... ;)

I'm actually feeling kind of bummed tonight. Not up to discussing it at the moment but the words under my avatar kinda says it all. I think I'll go to bed early, I hope it won't be a problem taking my meds earlier tonight but I seriously doubt it. If I can't sleep then I'll check back in. I may just lurk for the weekend.... :(

Well damn it all, Cindy, you always posting the same time as me...Now my little joke isn't funny now... :P
Started Atripla/Ziagen on 9/13/07.
10/31/07 CD4-265 VL- undetectable
2/6/08 CD4- 401 VL- undetectable
5/7/08 CD4- 705 VL- undetectable
6/4/08 CD4- 775 VL- undetectable
8/6/08 CD4- 805 VL- undetectable
11/13/08 CD4- 774 VL--undetectable
2/4/09  CD4- 484  VL- 18,000 (2 months off meds)
3/3/09---Starting Back on Meds---
4/27/09 CD4- 664 VL-- undetectable
6/17/09 CD4- 438 VL- 439
8/09 CD4- 404 VL- 1,600
01-22-10-- CD4- 525 VL- 59,000
Cherish the simple things life has to offer

The Royal Blog

Offline BT65

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #67 on: November 10, 2007, 07:57:50 AM »
Good morning ladies:

Cin, so sorry about your gf's dog.  It's always such a big loss when we lose one of our pets.  They're part of our family.  I'm so attached to my cat that I rescued from one of the local shelters.  She has three beds! :D  She's a big cat, and she's also very skiddish.  I've never met a cat who is as nervous as she is.  I tell people she has post-traumatic stress disorder from being around all those other cats at the shelter. :D  I saw at the pet store the other day something to give cats to make them calmer, but I don't want to get her strung out!LOL

Queen, what's up?  You've been in such a good mood, something must have happened.  You know we're here for you, girlfriend.  Talk anytime you're ready.

OK, hopefully I'll remember just not to smile too big this weekend, since one of my teeth is missing.  I hope no one notices.  It's embarassing, but it's liveable.  No reason for me to get all upset. 

Today I'm going to some arts & crafts show with one of my gf's and her mother.  Then we're going to go to an NA meeting later today.  In my town they put on The Nutcracker every year around this time and I'm going to ask my granddaughter if she would like to go see it.  Maybe start a tradition.  I've never seen it myself and I would love to see it.  Other than that, nothing else exciting going on.  I hope all you ladies are doing alright and have a great day-

Edited to add:  I've got a new quit date for smoking.  It's next Sunday, November 18th.  So I will start back on the Chantix today.  Wish me luck!
« Last Edit: November 10, 2007, 07:59:48 AM by Bettytacy »
I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

Offline emeraldize

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #68 on: November 10, 2007, 02:16:09 PM »
OK, hopefully I'll remember just not to smile too big this weekend, since one of my teeth is missing.  I hope no one notices.  It's embarassing, but it's liveable.  No reason for me to get all upset.
BT - Neighbor of mine used Super Glue for a DIY fix on her dentures. No firsthand experience, just passin' this along.

Offline Queen Tokelove

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #69 on: November 10, 2007, 02:37:00 PM »
Hey Girls---

Just thought I would check in and let you know I am alright. I am in the tub while writing this, trying to relax. Yesterday I was a bit bummed because of some things about Rico. Depending on how some things go, it may be over for me and him before it even gets started. Good thing I didn't disclose too soon. I slept in a bit today, just been up maybe an hour before getting in the tub. My plan was to soak and listen to some music but then I was like, hey I got wireless, I can chat, listen to music and soak... :D My skin will prolly look like a prune by the time I get out the tub at this rate... ;D I am waiting to get a call from Rico to see if he is coming over today. He said he has a lot to do so things are kinda up in the air.

Uh, Em, it is good to see you post but I must ask..You not talking to us anymore? Did we do something to offend you? I have noticed you post here and there but not really talking. You know I would be the one to come out and just ask... ;) I hope things are going well for you, by looking at your sig line, it seems like you are into some heavy activism. How is that going for you? I was talking to someone online who is thinking of starting a support group in my area, I think I may try that out or at least talk some more to see where his mind is about things.

I hope the rest of you ladies are doing fine, I must go rub a dub now before my skin shrivels up..... :D
Started Atripla/Ziagen on 9/13/07.
10/31/07 CD4-265 VL- undetectable
2/6/08 CD4- 401 VL- undetectable
5/7/08 CD4- 705 VL- undetectable
6/4/08 CD4- 775 VL- undetectable
8/6/08 CD4- 805 VL- undetectable
11/13/08 CD4- 774 VL--undetectable
2/4/09  CD4- 484  VL- 18,000 (2 months off meds)
3/3/09---Starting Back on Meds---
4/27/09 CD4- 664 VL-- undetectable
6/17/09 CD4- 438 VL- 439
8/09 CD4- 404 VL- 1,600
01-22-10-- CD4- 525 VL- 59,000
Cherish the simple things life has to offer

The Royal Blog

Offline sunseeker

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #70 on: November 10, 2007, 03:47:19 PM »
Hi Ladies

I am back after taking a very unwanted break.  I just worked 10 days of 12 hour shifts and had to put the thread on hold due to spending my nights with my Latin Lover.  Things are going so good.  I am just trying to enjoy the time we spend together and trying not to worry about any issues that may arise like his separation.  I have been so happy and Sunday tomorrow will be three weeks that we have been together.  We talk, text and see eachother when possible.  This is the first time since I found out that I was positive that I have felt like my old self.  He is great and we don't talk about my status to much as I don't want that to be the focus on the relationship.  We have had sex and that was great and he does not worry since he knows that I am paranoid and take every precaution to keep him safe.   

Before posting I read all of the threads that I have missed alto and it would be impossible to comment on everything.  Welcome to all of the newbies and I look forward to getting to know you better.

Cin and Queen I guess we are celebrating the same euphoria of have new men in our life.  Cindy wasn't such a relief to disclose and not have to worry and now we can just enjoy the time getting to know our men.  Queen i hope things go well with Rico when you do tell him.  I know when I told my Latino he asked why I decided to tell him and my answer was simple.  I told him that I did not get the choice when I got infected and there for I had to give him the choice.  He said that he appreciated me giving him the choice and also said that if I had not told him before we had sex he would have been mad that I had taken his choice away from him.  But nonetheless good luck and enjoy your time with Rico. 
« Last Edit: November 10, 2007, 05:15:07 PM by sunseeker »

Offline Dragonette

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #71 on: November 10, 2007, 04:33:30 PM »
Hi ladies

Queen, I am sorry things have become tangled... I hope they work out. Never tried taking a laptop into the bath, I usually read, but only at my parents' - no bath here just an old shower.

Betty, I am sorry about the tooth but I really admire you for putting it in proportion and not letting it stop you from getting around and doing your thing until it gets fixed. Sometimes I just forget that you are a grandma, although an incrediblely young one at that.

Cind, we (my parents) had to put down our dog when she was 18 going on 19. The mixed breeds are the ones that live longest. It's so sad to lose them... they are amazing companions, I can't tell you how strong I was bonded with my dogs, esp the last one. I still miss her so much and have her pics. Everytime I came home I literally came back for her as well. It's just love  :'(

Sun, you have no idea how happy I am for you!

NY... how was the sonogram (mmm what is it exactly?) hang in there... I know there is not much we can do for ya from behind the screen but there will be better times, happy times with this child and your other children. You will feel much better too. Not long now....

Cammie, how's it going? we are rooting for you here.

Em, Cristy, Tendai, Confused, Viv, Winiroo, Sara - hope you all doing well and having a great weekend.

Me am OK, went trick or treating with a friend's kids, my friend, and my BF (now he went to a party but I decided to stay home. it's so cold as well and I have not taken my flu vaccinations yet). They do it on a day called Saint Maarten's here. They have a whole bunch of holidays different from the UK and US. Presents they give in early Dec on a day called Saint Nikolaas. Santa Klaus (Sinterklaas) arrives at the end of next week, in a motorbike parade and goes from town to town. It's a very family oriented time, although this is not my religion you can't help being affected by it. I will be going again to my BF's family in Spain for Christmas and New Year. I am nervous. First, i gained a shitload of weight since the last one and I would like to lose some of it by then, I need to lose 5 kgs but I am not used to dietng and dont know how to really. I also know they expected me to learn some basic, conversationla spanish, which I haven't at all. then there is the whole issue of my meds which is harder to hide this time, and just in general, the big fat HIV secret. I will spend 2 weeks in their house but we will take a breather and drive off somewhere for a few days. They are very conservative and tradiitional people and their house is 100s of years old, and it's all like something out of a movie, so I must enjoy it like a tourist and not worry about fitting in. That's the idea anyway, but to put in into practice is harder.

that's it from me for now... have a peaceful weekend ladies,
"If you keep one foot in yesterday, and one in tomorrow, you piss all over today". Betty Tacy

Offline MOONLIGHT1114

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #72 on: November 10, 2007, 06:39:42 PM »
Hi GFs~

I am missing Iceman today, starting to get hooked on this idea of having someone special in my life!  I spent the afternoon getting my hair done with Mom at the salon, and also bought Iceman's gift.  I don't think he peeks in the threads, but I'm not posting what it is until after the fact!  :)  Needless to say, I am very excited about seeing him tomorrow and making his birthday a special one!  He'll come by late after he drops his girls off.

BT~  So sorry to hear about the tooth!  Goodness, it must have been ready to go if it came out that easily, or did you really chomp hard on something?  I haven't seen The Nutcracker since I was a little girl, but I absolutely loved it!  Its beautiful!  I know you'll enjoy it!  Congrats on setting your new quit date, atta girl!  How is the homework going this weekend?

Sun~ So good to hear from you!  Goodness, they had you working a lot!  At least you're employed!  I am nervous as I will have no income very soon.  I am hoping to get some bday money next week to help hold me over, but I see me digging into my credit, shit.  Yes, I have said the same thing as you to past romantic interests...."I didn't have a choice."  My late husband asked for unprotected sex only a few times, knowing full well he was pos, and he didn't tell me.  Thank goodness for Iceman, I was beginning to think the good guys were all gone!  So glad to hear you and your Latin Lover (LL) are doing so well!  Kinda just makes you give a big sigh of relief!   :)

Drag~  Things sound very festive in your part of the world!  I love a celebration and I am just starting to get excited about the holidays now!  Don't be so nervous about your trip to meet your BFs family, just be excited! 

As far as the extra weight, you need to fool your brain!  Drink LOTS of water before each meal, it will fill you up, clean out your system and help all around.  On one diet I did, I drank 32 ounces of water before I had my bowl of cereal in the morning, and throughout the day, about SIX 32 oz cups total.  Yes, I was running to the bathroom, but it helped me to lose weight faster. 

Also, try to have little snacks throughout the day rather than three big meals -- this keeps your metabolism up and you'll burn more fat.  This has worked for me as well, besides, I like to eat all of the time, so a granola bar here, a small sandwich there, an apple.....little "meals" every 2-3 hours is really good!  It works wonders for some people, as for many eating is a bad habit that is hard to break.  Why starve?  Just eat in moderation, and be sure to have your bigger meals earlier in the day, not at dinner! 

Also, if you feel like pigging out in the evening, eat foods with no carbohydrates.  I eat cheese, nuts, tuna, things high in protein curb your appetite and less carbs usually equals less weight gain! 

Hope this helps, being diabetic, I have learned many tricks over the years, I have a terrible sweet tooth! (You should see the cake I bought Iceman, and yes, I am going to try and light 45 candles on it and not blow it up!)

Queen~  I'm sure I know why you are bummed about Rico, but I know the GFs are wondering whats up with that.  Vent a little and let us know whats going on here.  It can only help!  Did you get a prune ass in the tub, or did you save yourself in time?   :D

OK, so Mom and Dad are supposed to take me out for birthday dinner, but they are at the movies.  I am starving!  I hope they call soon, they are seeing that new "American Gangster" movie with Denzel and Russel Crowe, very good reviews I hear!

~ Cindy
HIV+ since '93, 1/12 - CD4 785 and undet.   WOO-HOO!!

Offline Nygurl225

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #73 on: November 10, 2007, 08:57:05 PM »
Hello ladies!! Well I have been really busy trying to catch up with school work. I glanced at all the new posts but don't have time to read all of them in great detail. I will at some point this weekend.

Cin~ Sorry about your GFs dog. Our pets are like family. I know what a horrible feeling it is to lose one  :( I hope you find the perfect gift for iceman. I'm sure just spending time with you will make him happy.

Queen~~ Sorry to hear your going through some rough times. I hope things get better. Keep your head up!!

Betty~~ Best of luck to you!! Quitting is hard to do but if you really want to stop, you will do it!

Dragon~~ The sono went well. The babies head is buried in my hip so we couldnít see his face (yes it is a he). Heís not growing as well as weíd like but their not really concerned since both his father and I are small in stature. Weíre thinking heís just gonna be a little baby.

As for me Iím feeling a bit better today. Still stressed out but things are moving along. Iím out of work and awaiting disability so as of right now Iím DEAD BROKE!!! Its horrible to be without an income and not know when Iíll have one. I hope to God soon because I have no clue how Iíll get through from day to day. I guess Iíll find a way, I always do. These next few weeks will be rough.  Anyway, Iím off to do more school work. It seems never ending but I canít complain it helps keep my mind off the chaos of my life. I hope all you ladies are well tonight!

Offline confusedme

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #74 on: November 11, 2007, 12:17:26 AM »
I'm sorry for not responding to everyone, but I just cannot concentrate right now. My husband and I are not on speaking terms at the moment. I'll be back to update soon....maybe tomorrow. Hugs to everyone.
08/13/07 - Diagnosis confirmed
08/30/07 - T-cells 400, VL 6,500 (Baseline)
11/30/07 - T-cells 428, VL 9,950

Offline Queen Tokelove

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #75 on: November 11, 2007, 12:30:58 AM »
Sorry to hear that, Confused. Get back to us when you can and you know if you need to vent, we are here.
Started Atripla/Ziagen on 9/13/07.
10/31/07 CD4-265 VL- undetectable
2/6/08 CD4- 401 VL- undetectable
5/7/08 CD4- 705 VL- undetectable
6/4/08 CD4- 775 VL- undetectable
8/6/08 CD4- 805 VL- undetectable
11/13/08 CD4- 774 VL--undetectable
2/4/09  CD4- 484  VL- 18,000 (2 months off meds)
3/3/09---Starting Back on Meds---
4/27/09 CD4- 664 VL-- undetectable
6/17/09 CD4- 438 VL- 439
8/09 CD4- 404 VL- 1,600
01-22-10-- CD4- 525 VL- 59,000
Cherish the simple things life has to offer

The Royal Blog

Offline MOONLIGHT1114

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #76 on: November 11, 2007, 01:05:42 AM »
Hi GFs~

I was on the phone late with Iceman tonight, and sang him Happy Birthday at midnight.  He sounded a little tired from the day with his little women, but it sounds like they have a great relationship.  That's a good sign!

I told Iceman that I would take him to dinner, I know I can't afford it, but I told him I would, whatever he wanted.  He echoed, "Whatever I want?"   :P  So, yes, it seems the man would be perfectly fine skipping dinner and skipping straight to the bedroom!  We'll see what happens tomorrow.  He IS a man, so I gotta feed him!

NY~ You and I are rowing that unemployment boat!  I have about 4 more weeks of unemployment income and then *poof*!  I have had to supplement my income with credit cards and my debt is mounting.  I haven't been late on any payments, but its going to be a crazy juggling act if I don't get a job soon!  Somebody hire me!   ??? 

Confused~  I am so sorry to hear you and your man are having a rough go of it.  You can always come here and yell to us, vent, just get it out.  I hope you're OK.

Queen~  Did you see Rico tonight?  Or is he still there?  Maybe the two of you are in the tub together by now....... :P

Sleep tight, GFs.......Cam, tendai and Cristy, give a shout out.   :)

~ Cindy

HIV+ since '93, 1/12 - CD4 785 and undet.   WOO-HOO!!

Offline Queen Tokelove

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #77 on: November 11, 2007, 04:02:03 AM »
Nope, no Rico this evening. He was busy today and by the time he did want to come over, I just said no. He is suppose to come over tomorrow.....I think I may be stewing in my own juices so to speak. I wanted to see him but the later it got, the more bummed I got. I have been doing a bit of thinking and am now wondering if I like him too much. I know it sounds crazy but all I seem to be doing is thinking of him. I haven't told him that though.

By the time he wanted to come over it was after 11 pm. I told him that would be considered a booty call but he says that wasn't the reason for wanting to come over and maybe it wasn't. When I told him to wait til Sunday, I could hear the disappointment in his voice but I knew if he came that late he would not be going home.

I think I am an emotional mess right about now and more than likely I am doing it to myself. He hasn't given me any reason to be leery of him but I am wondering if things are moving too fast or is it too fast for me? I have been out of the dating game for awhile. It's not like he has declared his undying love for me or anything like that. I dunno, I just feel so confused right now. I don't want to push him away but maybe I am afraid of letting him get close.

As for what I mentioned to you, Cindy. That is on my mind too but I did make a job listing for him so on Tuesday he will be looking for a second job. He did manage to get his own apartment but I am wondering if he may have bitten off more than he can chew, not sure yet but I like his perserverance if nothing else. I am about ready to go back to that damn astrology link and see what the hell is going on with me.... ;D

I think I am going to take my confused ass to sleep or at least try to sleep..... :-\
Started Atripla/Ziagen on 9/13/07.
10/31/07 CD4-265 VL- undetectable
2/6/08 CD4- 401 VL- undetectable
5/7/08 CD4- 705 VL- undetectable
6/4/08 CD4- 775 VL- undetectable
8/6/08 CD4- 805 VL- undetectable
11/13/08 CD4- 774 VL--undetectable
2/4/09  CD4- 484  VL- 18,000 (2 months off meds)
3/3/09---Starting Back on Meds---
4/27/09 CD4- 664 VL-- undetectable
6/17/09 CD4- 438 VL- 439
8/09 CD4- 404 VL- 1,600
01-22-10-- CD4- 525 VL- 59,000
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Offline BT65

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #78 on: November 11, 2007, 09:18:21 AM »
Good morning ladies:

So much action since I last checked in! 

Sun, it sounds like you're really busting your ass.  I hope you have some time to yourself!

NY, are there any food pantries where you're at?  Where I live there are a few, and sometimes I use them to supplement my food.  Disability is such a waiting game, I know, believe me.  Just hang in there.  Something will turn up.

Drag, don't get stressed out about the upcoming holidays.  It seems like Cin has offered some good suggestions about losing weight.  I'm not really sure what to tell you about learning conversational Spanish.  How long have you got?  Someone told me Spanish was one of the easiest languages to learn.  When I took it in college years ago, I got a "B" and it wasn't really all that hard.  Just different variations of verbs etc.  How are you going to learn it?  Take a class or just try to teach it to yourself? 

Queen, I'm really sorry to hear things are rocky right now with you and Rico.  I understand about liking someone too much, too fast.  I know you'll make the right decision for you.  Remember, we're here for you.  Don't give up the ship!

Cin, I'm anxiously awaiting to hear what you got for Iceman for his birthday!  Is it today that you're going to give his present to him?  Hey, girl, happy birthday by the way!  I hope you have a happy one!  You're lucky to have both parents to do things with.  I really miss my mom still.  She always made things like birthdays special.  I know you appreciate your parents, don't ever take them for granted.  Anyway, you deserve to have a good birthday.  Maybe you should treat yourself to something special, like a massage or a soak in some algae or whatever it is they do now. :P 

Well, I was supposed to get my new computer today, but I haven't heard from my brother's girlfriend who was supposed to bring it over this morning and set it up.  She's on the Geek Squad at Best Buy here and was going to get me one at her cost.  So, it doesn't look like I'll be getting one today.  Oh well, some things are just too good to be true.

As far as the tooth, a friend of mine told me at CVS they have some kind of "glue" for denture repair, but since I'm seeing the dentist tomorrow, I don't think I want to waste the money on that.  I've been just trying to check myself when I want to laugh or give a big smile. :D  I'll survive until tomorrow.....

Other than that, I'm meeting with my algebra class and the teacher today at the library.  Last week's assignment was easier than the first things we did in class (domains of functions, slopes etc.).  It reminded me kind of what I did in algebra 30 years ago.  So it wasn't as confusing as the rest of the stuff.  I did order my granddaughter and I two tickets to The Nutcracker.  Oh, maybe I already posted that.  We're going to be sitting directly in front of the stage.  Maybe this will be a new tradition with her.  I'm looking forward to it.  I've never seen The Nutcracker, so this will be a new experience for me.  She's seen it, and I guess she loves it and doesn't have a problem sitting through it (she's only seven).  I'll probably start X-Mas shopping soon, also.  I want to get it done before the last-minute crowds take over the stores.  This year just went by so fast, sometimes it's hard to keep track of everything that has happened in a year.  Well, anyways, I hope all you ladies have a great day and whoever I missed, I apologize-
I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

Offline MOONLIGHT1114

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #79 on: November 11, 2007, 09:36:33 AM »
Hi Queen~  You're being too hard on yourself.  You should allow yourself to date and have fun.  So what if after 11pm is a booty call.  GF, you are up until 5am, so 11pm is dinnertime!   ;D  If you really like the guy, allow yourself to be with him, there's no reason why you shouldn't.  I went through the same thing years ago, telling myself the girl was "supposed to do the right thing" and be pursued, but not always give in to being "chased."  Finally, I said screw it and started calling guys first, suggesting we get together, and it was fun!  I have no problem being the assertive one.

Now, come on, was it more fun sitting home by yourself?  If Rico had come over at midnight you would've been elated because you like him.  Yes, it sounds like what I am saying is "Go ahead, rush in some more" but isn't that what its all about?  Being with someone you like?  He's not always going to be available at the perfect time, he will have to work, you will be doing things yourself, so just let it be and make things work where they can.

Are you putting up a wall perhaps because you haven't yet disclosed?  If you feel that you are, I understand, and please forgive me.  Somehow I think that even with disclosure on the back burner for now, you are a tough, strong woman.  Its OK to have a good time! 

You gotta admit Rico is more fun than video games, right?  I mean you can push his buttons, too!   ;)

Hi BT~  Yes, tonight I'll give Iceman his gift.  I tell you I almost got a panic attack yesterday in the department store. LOL  "Is this too personal?  This isn't personal enough.  What if he doesn't like this?"  I was driving myself nuts, but managed to make my mind up in  half hour, lol, so I did pretty good.

I also bought a small cake for Iceman and I will attempt to light 45 candles on it without lighting my hair on fire, and without him seeing me do this.  This coming from the girl who has never lit a match or used a traditional lighter before in her life, lol!  I have those longer lighters, about 8" long, where the clicker is well away from the flame.  I know, its crazy, but it works for me. 

I am thinking I'll stash the cake upstairs and when we get back from dinner, he'll probably go to the restroom, so I'll jump and start lighting the candles in the next room, and then surprise him.  I am so excited!  I can't wait!  Iceman will be coming over again Weds 11/14 for my birthday.

On another note, I will be picking up a coffee table and two end tables today, courtesy of freecycle.org.  I got dibs on the set last night, and the owner will be emailing directions today.  I am also waiting to hear back on a bookcase and a comforter set, too!  Thanks, Queen!

~ Cindy
« Last Edit: November 11, 2007, 09:40:46 AM by MOONLIGHT1114 »
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Offline emeraldize

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #80 on: November 11, 2007, 04:17:50 PM »
Uh, Em, it is good to see you post but I must ask..You not talking to us anymore? Did we do something to offend you? I have noticed you post here and there but not really talking. You know I would be the one to come out and just ask...  I hope things are going well for you, by looking at your sig line, it seems like you are into some heavy activism. How is that going for you? I was talking to someone online who is thinking of starting a support group in my area, I think I may try that out or at least talk some more to see where his mind is about things.

GQ, and others.

Thanks for inquiring. You're right, I post less here, but for a variety of reasons. And, being offended is not in the mix.   

I'm involved in an activism role on a specific project with several site members off line. Once ready, we'll invite forum members, lurkers and people worldwide to participate, easily, in ways they haven't or couldn't before.

What takes me offline most, however, is life stuff. The driving event is the adoption. After two years of process, I got the call to pick up my daughter. Logistics issues, Customs paperwork and a host of other tasks  are in play so things are reasonably ready for her arrival.

It's tighter time-wise because a new job is coming down the chute; I finished HIV pre/post test counseling training and am now certified, and I'm participating locally on key issues affecting PLWHA. Thankfully, I'm still in touch via phone and old-fashioned letter writing with GM who was gracious when I asked to put things on hold while I focus on the adoption and home projects. That's the simple version.

I look forward to reading of your future support group--the one you started. It's a great goal and one that might give you a great deal of satisfaction while helping others who are wishing such a group existed.

On the support topic, I am glad Minismom found the AM site and hope Peter will consider adding a Pediatric HIV/AIDS forum -- it could be invaluable to mom's and dad's worldwide.

Em

Offline BT65

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #81 on: November 11, 2007, 04:32:03 PM »
Good evening ladies:

I am typing this on my new computer!  I'm so excited.  It's a brand new 17-inch flatscreen monitor with a three-in-one printer (prints, scans, copies).  My brother's girlfriend brought it over today and set the whole thing up.  I can't believe the difference from that old Windows 98.  But there definitely is a difference.

Well, Cin, right about now you're probably eating dinner.  I hope tonight goes well.  I'll be anxiously waiting to hear!

Em, I'm glad the adoption thing is coming together for you.  You deserve some good things.  That's terrific also on your training.  Way to go!

Queen, I do hope you're doing alright. 

Everyone else, I hope you all have a pleasant evening.  I'm going to check out some other threads.  Have a good one ladies-
I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

Offline MOONLIGHT1114

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #82 on: November 11, 2007, 05:08:49 PM »
Hi GFs~

Em, that's great news about your daughter finally coming to her new home with you!  I'm very excited for you!   :D  Also, what you're doing with the activism is admirable, and I am excited to hear what you and other members are working on.  Please keep us posted!

Betty~  Congrats on the new computer!  Mine is from 2001 but I will use it until it falls over, lol!  I have Windows XP, so it works pretty good.

I'm not at dinner with Iceman yet, obviously, but I need to get ready!  I have been Freecycling all day!  I could open my own moving company!  I brought the 3 tables home, as well as a tall narrow bookcase!  I just responded to an ad for an oak dining set, I hope I get considered!

I'll post about the birthday date tomorrow!

Have a great evening, everyone!

~ Cindy
« Last Edit: November 12, 2007, 09:11:38 AM by MOONLIGHT1114 »
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Offline Nygurl225

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #83 on: November 11, 2007, 06:07:09 PM »
Hi ladies!!

Queen~~ Weíve all been there honey. Hang in there and just give yourself time and a little space to think. Youíll eventually come to realize where things stand between you and Rico, it just takes time. Things are still very new.

Cin~~ I have to say I smile just reading how giddy you are over Iceman. Itís so nice that youíve found something like this in your life. I must say Iím very happy for you! Good luck with all those candles, donít set off any smoke alarms!! Oh and cin, please fill me in on this free cycle thing you speak of. I could definitely use something like this.

Betty~~ YAY!! A new computer! Good for you Enjoy!!

Well ladies, nothing new here. Same ole BS. Just engulfed in school work and trying to make it through the days/weeks with no income UGH! I have an appointment with social services Wed. Iím going to apply for assistance because disability informed me that they may not be able to pay me for two weeks worth of time which I was out of work. They told me they only begin paying maternity leave at 38 weeks and I was pulled out of work at 36 weeks. I have a feeling this will be a fight. In the meantime I need to get by. The problem is without income transportation/gas money is an issue. At almost $3.30 a gallon gas is going to kill my wallet. I guess I will have to find a way to get by. Well, Iím off to bake some cinnamon swirl bread for the kids who have been driving me insane all day!! Hopefully a snack, some milk a bath and theyíll be off to bed. Itís been a long draining day for me. I hope everyone is doing well. Until next time girlys!!

Offline seekay70

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #84 on: November 11, 2007, 09:55:36 PM »
Ok so I was told to boogy my butt over here, so here I am....I got a job today so that is a good thing.....then I went and played bingo with my mom and gma ....didnt win chit, so good thing I only spent 16 bucks.  then I pick my kids up from their aunts house and they were good all day long, then I come home and their dad calls and that gave me the worst headache in the world.  I dont mind them talkin to their dad but then we always seem to have words cause he talks shit to the kids.  So I  told him that basically if he kept that up I wouldnt even answer the phone when he called.  And of course now that he has called they want to show their butts and not go to bed and I have to get up at 3am to be at work by 4am.  But that is my news for the day.  Hmmmm maybe I should just start a blog on this day to day BS, but then I say to myself...."Self, who really wants to hear you bitching all of the time".  Answer.....probably noone.......lol, but thats my words for the day.

Sherry

Offline confusedme

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #85 on: November 12, 2007, 12:08:47 AM »
Cindy, I hope all went well with they birthday dinner. I will be looking for details tomorrow.

Queen, I'm sorry you are feeling down and confused about Rico. I do agree with Cindy on the after-eleven rule though. BTW, our boys beat NY tonight. Did you happen to see the game?

Betty, glad you are enjoying your new computer. I'm glad she came through for you. That will help loads with the school work.

Em, congratulations on finally finishing the adoption process and your new job. All that and activism? You are one determined busy lady.

As for me, the drama has died down for today but I really don't think the issue is resolved and I don't see it getting resolved any time soon. He has some major trust issues and I am sick to death of catching the most of it. He starts with the cold shoulder, then when I get sick of that he pulls out the ridiculous accusations which of course leads to the argument. I give him the "whatever" and remove myself from the situation and within a few hours he is fine and vows to "talk it out with me tomorrow". We all know tomorrow never comes. Things will be good for a couple of weeks to a month and then he catches stupidity again. I told him that I hope it's not too late when he finally realizes how good I am to him. The sane part of me tells me to put him out and cut my losses but the stupid "in-love" part keeps hoping things will get better. It either will or he will keep up his shit until love just doesn't matter anymore. I'm not even sure what I am hoping for anymore...other than an end to the bullshit.

Well that is all for now. I gotta get to bed. I've got four 10-hour days in a row so I'll be checking in after work. Friday is my appointment...dread is looming. This is only my second one. I'm still not over hating docs but I'm getting there. After the appointment I'll get to relax for a few days though. Boss gave me a 4 day weekend this time. *whew!*
« Last Edit: November 12, 2007, 12:11:38 AM by confusedme »
08/13/07 - Diagnosis confirmed
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11/30/07 - T-cells 428, VL 9,950

Offline BT65

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #86 on: November 12, 2007, 07:05:32 AM »
Good morning ladies:

Anxiously awaiting Cindy's news on the birthday supper and present.....

NY, you definitely have some challenges ahead of you.  BTW, did you consider looking into if they have any foodbanks in your area?  They must, I think they have them everywhere.  I use them sometimes to supplement groceries.  Whatever I don't use, I just redonate.  That might be something worth checking into though. 

Sherry, girl, you've got quite the situation on your hand's with the kid's father.  When my first husband and I separated, he was never personally involved in our daughter's life.  He knew he could never take care of her, as he was a chronic alcoholic.  I was thankful for that, though.  I hope you new job goes well for you.  What will you be doing?

Confused, I'm no marriage counselor, but I'm wondering if maybe a real marriage counselor would help your situation.  A good therapist is worth their weight in gold.  And it could be a neutral party for you and your husband to work out your differences.  How long have you been married?  I don't know if what you describe has been the norm throughout all of your marriage, but to me, it would get old after awhile.  I'm not telling you to kick him out, don't get me wrong.  We all know what our limit is.  I just thought I'd throw out the suggestion of maybe marriage counseling. 

I've got a dentist's appointment in a couple hours.  I'm going to get my top denture repaired where the tooth came out.  I'm sure they'll try to get me to buy a whole new set, but that's not happening.  I'll just tell them to check with Medicare and Medicaid to see if they will pay for one-I'm not going to.  I haven't been to a dentist since 1989, when I have my teeth (what hadn't been knocked out) pulled and got dentures.  So I'm a little nervous.

Other than that, I'm enjoying my new computer.  It's nice to be able to get something once in awhile.  Cin, I had Windows 98 before this, so it's a big change!  As soon as the hard drive on my old one gets erased, which will happen Saturday, I'm going to donate it to Goodwill.  I'm sure someone will want it.  There is such a difference in the size of the equipment also.  My old one took up a whole table.  This new one is really a breath of fresh air. 

I hope all you ladies have a good day.  Will post later about the dentist.  It's storming here and I need to go to the laundermat, so I hope it quits before too long.  Later ladies-
I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

Offline MOONLIGHT1114

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #87 on: November 12, 2007, 10:01:32 AM »
Hi GFs~

OMG Iceman's birthday was so much fun!  I suggested a few places for dinner and we ended up at a sports bar which is new in my area.  My Skins had already lost to the Eagles (which was an F-ing joke), and Iceman's Ravens got clobbered too.  Sorry Queen and Confused, but I was rooting for the Giants -- a rare thing in my division!  ;)  Damn Dallas knocked them over too!

My sugar was crashing during dinner, at least it felt like it was, although it read 160.  I think it had something to do with moving furniture all day long, shock to the system!   :D The check came and Iceman went to reach for it and I snatched it, I said it was the least I could do.  He insisted that he pay but I said I would get it cause it was his birthday, and he finally agreed, thinking that was his "present" from me.  ;)

We got back to my place and I'm feeding Cheech, and Iceman says he's headed to the basement to use the restroom.  Well, you've never seen a girl move so fast!  I had the cake stashed in the cupboard with 45 candles in it already.  I ran upstairs and hid in the bathroom, and started lighting the candles.  OMG, this was a riot!  I was nervous and giggling to myself the entire time.  I lit one birthday candle in my hand and got about 8 on the cake lit rather quickly.  Remember, I hate fire, and the idea of a birthday candle flame that close to my thumb and index finger was freaking me out, but I kept going.  Then I notice the candle I am holding has burned nearly halfway through in about ten seconds!  There was no way I was going to get 45 candles lit using the one I was holding, it was melting so fast!  I go to blow out the one in my hand and blow out the 8 that were lit on the cake.  Shit.  Giggle.  Time for back-up.  I got the long clicker lighter and started again.  One click and I lit about 10 candles.  Click and light and so on.  OK, we have a small inferno going now. 

Keep in mind this cake was a quarter of a quarter sheet cake, about 6"x9", so the entire thing was covered with these candles.  I was determined, and a little worried my hair would slide forward and I would burn to death, but I kept going.  It took about a minute, and I was done.  I hear Iceman talking to Cheech downstairs, so I open the door to the upstairs hallway and call out to him in a nervous voice.  Just as I did that, a draft blew into the bathroom and the flames all went from about a half inch to two inches high on the cake.  Shit!!!!!!!!!!!!  (LOL)  I was ready to drop the cake in the sink and turn on the water.  Iceman calls out, "Yes?" and I say, "Come here...QUICK!"  in a very nervous voice.  He thought something was wrong with my blood sugar and came charging up the stairs to the small inferno I was holding in my hands.  I turned the lights out and sang the four lines to "Happy Birthday to you" in about 5 seconds.  The hallway was glowing, the candles were burning high and bright, but no one had caught fire.  He had the biggest smile on his face and went to blow out the candles.  He asked, "Did you really put 45 on there?"  I said ,"Yes and I nearly caught myself on fire when I opened the door to the hallway!"  We were laughing and I was apologizing for singing the birthday song at record speed.  We went downstairs, cut the cake after removing all of those candles, put our feet up on my new coffee table and relaxed.  The cake was so good!  It had white icing with a couple of blue roses in the corner over yellow cake, and I had covered it with white candles, almost to my demise.   :D  SO GLAD my hair didn't slide forward into those flames when I got that sucker lit!  I kept telling Iceman, "I should've just bought the 4 and the 5 candles for '45'!"   ;D  I was trying to save a few bucks, lol!   :P

So, we inhaled the cake and I took the plates into the kitchen while he watched TV.  I reached under the sink to where I had his gift stashed.  I had a gift bag that was light blue and white, with a clear window on the front, in the shape of a fish bowl.  There were two orange fish "in the bowl."  I always would say when dating, "I'm just a fish, swimming in the bowl," so it seemed appropriate, since I met Iceman "in the bowl" on Match.com.

I walked up behind him in the LR and dropped the bag down in front of him.  He couldn't believe it.  I mean, I had paid for dinner AND almost set us both on fire five minutes prior, so he thought that he had had enough excitement for one night!  I had blue tissue paper in the bag so the fish in the bowl looked like they were swimming, lol, and I had wrapped a small box in the blue paper as well.  I ended up getting him a cologne set from Calvin Klein.  It has the five fragrances Obsession, Eternity (personal fave), Euphoria, CK1 and CKin2u.  The "1" and "2" both smelled very good!  I couldn't find a Polo set with different fragrances, and he wears Polo.  It turned out good though, cause he said he was almost out of cologne.  This way he has a little sample of all five and hopefully he'll like 2 or 3 of them.  Man, they smelled good!   :P

Iceman got all serious and couldn't believe I had made his birthday so special.  I didn't want to wait another year to celebrate his birthday, I just didn't.  Maybe I went overboard because I am unemployed, but I am a giver, and I definitely scaled things down from what I would normally do for a guy I care about.  Oh, and the card!  On the front it had the four words "Sweet, Caring, Fun, Romantic" and on the inside it says,"You're almost too good to be true."  Perfect.  So, then we went upstairs, it was about 9:30pm by now, and had a great evening together until the wee hours of the morning.  I am glowing, Iceman is REALLY glowing, and has even said I get to meet his sister next weekend before we go to a friend's birthday party.  Things are progressing quickly, but rather well!  So, now I get to meet family and friends.  Unfortunately, both of Iceman's parents are deceased, I just can't imagine.

After Iceman left this morning,  ;)  I checked my email, and I got the oak table and chairs set!  Queen, I took the advice I read in a Freecycle Moderator's email to the group, which said to state WHY I needed the items.  I said my BF and I had split and he took all of the furniture, and also that I was unemployed.  Because I stated why I needed the items, the owner chose me, she even said I was the only one who offered up an explanation.  I am so thrilled!!  The set is a 5'x3' oak table, with oak chairs that have green legs.  Even if its veneer and not real oak, I'll take it!  Now I have a table to serve Thanksgiving dinner on for Iceman and myself!   :D  He is going to get a truck from one of his stores and help me get everything tomorrow night before heavier rain moves in on Wednesday.  He likes to help out so much, it really is a blessing, I hate to ask for anything, but he just offers!

Sorry if the candle-lighting detail bored you, but it was such a riot with me trying to be sneaky and the cake being so much ablaze that you could hardly see the icing.  Everything went well though, and Iceman is going to get off of work early Wednesday to come celebrate my 38th!  Wow, this IS too good to be true!

OK, so will someone hire me already, please?  That would be "the icing on the cake!"   ;D

Betty, I hope that tooth is repaired by now and that you're out of the hotseat at the dentists office! 

NY, Queen told us about www.freecycle.org a few weeks back.  People offer up things for free rather then throwing them out.  Since I've started, I've picked up a bagless windtunnel vacuum, a coffee table and two matching end tables, a tall narrow bookcase, and soon I'll have my DR set!  Its awesome.  Lots of kids clothes on there, too!  You put your zip code in when you register and see who has what to offer in your area.  Fun!

Have a great day, GFs!

~ Cindy
« Last Edit: November 12, 2007, 11:52:25 PM by MOONLIGHT1114 »
HIV+ since '93, 1/12 - CD4 785 and undet.   WOO-HOO!!

Offline Nygurl225

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #88 on: November 12, 2007, 11:14:29 AM »
Confused, I hope things get better.  Iíve been with men like that and its rough. I myself hate doctors too but  I guess its something we must learn to deal with. I hope all goes well for you.

Betty, I think I will take your advice and look into food banks. Sounds like a good idea.  Glad your going to get your tooth fixed. Iím sure that will make you feel a whole lot better. Continue to enjoy the new computerÖhow exciting!!!!!

Cin~~ I laughed the entire time while reading the candle story..far from boring. Iím glad you had a good time! Iím going to check out freecycle. God knows I could use some stuff!!

As for me nothing new. Just figured Iíd stop in and say hello.  Hope everyone has a great day!

Offline Dragonette

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #89 on: November 12, 2007, 12:11:44 PM »
Hi all

Cindy, it sounds amazing!! I am not bored but entertained and more than that really really happy for you!!! I can't tell you how much...

Betty, how's your tooth? It's raining here too, but today I walked to work b/c my bike is in repair. Temps are already down to max 5-4 celsius. Congrats on the computer! I could use a nice new desktop myself. Enjoy!!

Confused, I am sorry for the mess... I will point out though, you mention that you guys fight once a month... I would not put up with extreme jealousy or whatever, but the way you describe it you have some issues you need to work on & I can see why you're fed up but it doesn't sound hopeless... a couple I know just broke up, but they were fighting like every other day... then again you did previously mention that your guy is possibly dealing  ???, or someone else mentioned that. If that's the case, well... if he is not dealing and trying to straighten out and the moods are the result of the issues he is struggling with, I would not be pissed, not saying I'd like it but... that's just me, but then again I get moody at least once a month (guess when). I hope I am not confusing you with someone else, there are so many new women here lately, but I don't think so.

NY you sound a little better, like nothing special, but just living... I'm glad.

Seekay... hi there... glad you joined us. Congratulations on the job!

Queen, how're you do doing? what happened? I wouldn't let someone come round after 11 if we were not committed either, it's not a pride thing, it's self preservation [sorry to contradict you there Cindy]. OK, that is not true - I am sure I would if I had feelings for the guy, but then I would be anxious, like does it mean that he sees me just as a sex buddy. But i don't know how much is you being over-cautious and how much is real... from what you described Rico previously it doesn't really sound like him. I do know you guys just started getting to know one another. I know you won't like this but I think not disclosing might be a part of it... just knowing you have this secret. I think the difference btw disclosing "before" and "after" is that there is so much guilt involved in the second. It's like not just disclosing but also apologizing for not having said anything before. Is it possible that you are testing Rico to see if he is worth all the hassle of disclosure? I know it's unfair those of us who are poz in the relationship have the short end of the straw, at least in the beginning. I hope everything works out for you, as Cindy mentioned you haven't met someone who rocked your world (? is that English?) in quite a while and I think you need to give it a chance and more importantly, enjoy it, think about you want and need (without excluding him of course)...

Anyways, hope you feel better soon.

I didn't start on my diet yet and the clock is ticking... in fact I made a cake last night. Thanks for the tips though! I am trying to kind of hypnotize my way into it. I'll let you know how it went tonight, I learned some acupressure techniques I want to use when I'm anxious. Cos that's when I eat. And I am usually more anxious than not.

Have a good evening everyone,
"If you keep one foot in yesterday, and one in tomorrow, you piss all over today". Betty Tacy

Offline Winiroo

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #90 on: November 12, 2007, 03:49:49 PM »
I'm at work right now. My eyes are watering and my stomach is doing the hokey pokey from trying to contain my laughter at the candle story.
Thanks Cindy
LOL


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Offline seekay70

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #91 on: November 12, 2007, 04:47:25 PM »
Howdie all

Well first day of the job went well....I am working at a convenience store, and there is  pipeline company in town and damn them folks can drink some coffee, I swear I made 50 pots of coffee today.  Oh and some of the ones that came in are real eye candy let me tell you.

Betty, as far as the hubby ordeal, we are seperated, he is into drugs and I took my kids and left the state, he just seems to disrupt the kids on a daily basis, marriage counseling is out of the question because he feels as though he has no problems.  I think what I am going to do is just only let them talk to him every other day or so, just not answer the phone when he calls.  I told him I was planning on getting my own place and he is more concerned with wether or not I will have a phone than he is about lights or water.  But it is a long drawn out story, one saved for another day I suppose.

Iceman seems like a real charmer, you go girl. Maybe one day when my boys are grown I will think about another relationship....as for now I think it is the last thing in the wrld I need or want.

anyway, i need to go get the kids off of the bus, I will be back later I am sure.

Sherry

Offline sunseeker

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #92 on: November 12, 2007, 06:05:31 PM »
Hi Ladies

Well, I am waiting for LL to call he is coming over.  I am getting a little nervous since his wife was coming to get the kids at 2pm and its now 3 and he has not called me yet.  I am very nervous waiting for that phone call and am resisting the urge to pick up the phone and call to see where he is at, but I do not want to disturb him.  But my mind is running wild that they maybe talking about wanting to get back together.  I am sure I am being paranoid and she was late and then he had to get his stuff together etc.  I just can't bare the thought of not being with him at least right now.  I have never been so happy in my life and he has made me feel like myself again since finding out about being +.

Well, off to get my mind of LL and will post later. 

Offline BT65

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #93 on: November 12, 2007, 06:38:49 PM »
Good evening ladies:

OK Sherry, now I remember your story.  Thanks for jogging my memory.  It's like Drag said, there are so many new women on here, it's hard to keep everyone straight.  I would probably start screening my calls and not accepting anymore of his calls.  You've got enough to worry about being a single mom with those boys; you certainly don't need a grown up to have to worry about.  But remember, you have to make that first move.  We're here to cheer you on.

Sun, I hope you got together with LL.  (I'm sorry, I can't remember what that stands for).  If you're worried about he and his wife getting back together, just ask him. 

Seekay, glad the job went well for you today.  I go to a 7-11 a couple blocks away all the time and it seems as though they are always making coffee also.

OK, Cin, what a story!  I'm so glad it went well and I'm glad you didn't get incinerated! :D  It sounds like it was a great time.  I absolutely love Calvin Klein fragrances.  I have a bottle of Eternity right now and I just really like it.  I used to get nothing but the expensive stuff, body wash sets etc., but now sometimes because of the budget crunch, I settle for body sprays. :P  I just like to smell good.

I got my tooth fixed.  It's now back in my denture. Of course, they tried to talk me into a new set, which would cost $3200.00.  I told them I wasn't interested and didn't have the money. Then they acted like they were a little pissed off because I wasn't falling into their trap.  I don't care, I speak up when I think I'm being hoodwinked.  And I did tell them I thought they were over-priced.  But I expected it, so at least I was prepared. 

Other than that, nothing else really going on here.  Pretty soon I'm going to have to start on a paper for my Child & Adolescent Psychology class.  We have three more papers due in there and only four weeks of classes left.  I'm not going to do it tonight, because I have to get the article approved by the teacher I'm going to be doing the paper on.  Anyway, have a great evening ladies.  I might check in later. 
I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

Offline seekay70

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #94 on: November 12, 2007, 09:52:13 PM »
This is kind of off the subject of everyting on here but I gots a question.........I want to go to school...thought about doing online classes but I have no idea which would be good.  Does anyone have any ideas?  I want to go into criminal justice, and I can go to the local community college but I think it may take me to long that way.... what ya'll think....anyone have any thoughts on reputable online colleges for criminal justice......just a thought.


Sherry

Offline vivyt

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #95 on: November 12, 2007, 10:41:16 PM »
Hello Ladies!

Today was a day off for me... :). Although I spent it and the weekend grading. I have report cards due next week so this is my "stressed" time of year. I do have some good news to report. I went to the doctor today to get my blood work results and he said that my VL is at 50 and that means it is undetectable and my Tcell count is up to 200. I was very happy to hear about my VL. My count is getting higher but I wish it hurry up.

Cindy-That was a funny story! I am glad things are going well.
Betty-I am glad you were able to get your tooth fixed. That would have driven me crazy!
Queen-I know I don't really know you but you have been on my mind lately. I hope everything is OK.

Have a good evening everyone! :) :)

Offline MOONLIGHT1114

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #96 on: November 13, 2007, 12:37:47 AM »
Hi GFs~

I moved more furniture today, got that oak DR set over here.  The chairs are inside, but the table is still in my Jeep Liberty -- its too heavy to move alone.  Its an oak oval shape, with dark green legs 60" x 44", so its big!  Iceman will help me unload it on Wednesday.  I also got another coffee table from the DR set lady, so now I have choices.  Imagine that, lol.

I am trying not to think about unemployment right now, just wish it was this time next year, so I would know what the future holds.  Sigh......patience.  Needless to say, I am very happy to be leaving 37 and 2007 behind me.  Iceman wants to bring in the New Year with me at my favorite club near my house.  It should be funny since everyone will be bombed and neither of us drink, lol!  My favorite band www.thereaganyears.com will be playing again.  I just saw them before Halloween weekend, when I went out alone.

Jay has been IMing me and I haven't answered.  Chris in VA who I have IMed for about 5 years and only spoken to a few times actually called me last night when I was at dinner with Ice.  I was so hot for Chris for so long and he would never budge.  His voice mail last night at 930pm said, "Maybe you can come down here and see me?"  LOL  I am not going anywhere for anyone.  I am happy with Iceman and I am trying to distance myself from these guys I have been in touch with.  I'm a little sentimental about Jay, but I know we will be friends.  He is obviously concerned about my pos status, so I know better, but I feel he is just looking out for me.  People seem to have a difficult time believing that my virus is under control and that I am doing well.  Besides, Iceman is so caring and accepting, its amazing.  He has the hottest bod, too!  LOL  I told him he looked like Tarzan, lol!  Yum!   :P

OK, Queen, get out of your funk and come here and talk to us.  You haven't posted, GF, and I know that's a bad sign.  Maybe if you vent here you'll feel better?  I know you have gotten quiet before and we had to drag your ass back here.  So c'mon, Ya-Ya Sisterhood and all, we are here for you.  Lord knows you have been posting here longer than any of us, I think, you are our Queen!

Please come post and let us know how you're doing with Rico.  Love you, GF!   :-*

Same goes for Cam, Cristy and Tendai, how are you girls?

NY~ Glad you got a laugh out of my candle-lighting ceremony, just make sure that baby doesn't arrive too soon from laughing!   :D  How are things going with your work/financial situation?  Mine absolutely sucks.  I don't know what else to do.

Drag~  Glad you're happy for me, I can feel your good vibes from across the pond tonight.  No prob not agreeing with me as far as Queen.  I just learned long ago that if I wanted to be a little selfish, if I wanted something, if I wanted to DO something, AND IF I could live with myself the next day, then I would go for it.  No sense delaying something that makes you feel good UNLESS you can't face yourself the next morning.

Win~  Oh goodness, I bet I made you wetcha pants, GF, lol!  I was such a wreck getting those candles lit!  I wish I could have video taped myself!

Sherry~  Glad work went well for you, wish I could say the same!  Eye candy is a good thing!  Girl, if you are making THAT much coffe then it must be raining men!  Enjoy the view!  So sorry about the issues with your husband, it seems that when someone thinks they have no problems, that in itself IS the problem.  Don't bang your head against the wall too hard, just take care of yourself and the kids.  As far as school, I have a BA in Psychology and looked into getting a BS in Accounting online two years ago.  This was through University of Phoenix.  I would only need half the credit hours since all of my general studies would probably transfer towards the additional degree.  You know for 13 months online those crackers wanted $14,000?  That certainly ended that deal!  Too damn expensive!

Sun~  What happened with LL? ("Latin Lover" to keep BT up to date.... ;D)  I know how you feel, not wanting to call and interrupt anything, but I would have called or the curiosity would have driven me crazy!  Hopefully, he got to see you and all is well.  I know how you feel, I am starting to feel the same way about Ice, that things are so good that something is bound to go wrong.  Just remember that the challenges make you stronger!

BT~  I love Eternity too, for men and women, it smells so good!  Glad to hear you pissed off the dentist!  LOL  Don't they know your situation even a little, as far as limited income?  They always think they can corner you.  $3200 is a lot of dough. 

Viv~  That is great that you're undetectable!  Good news!  Be patient with the CD4, it likes to take its damn time.  Mine was in the mid-300s for about 3 years, up until this year.  You can see where things have gone in just 9months, and I didn't even change meds.  I haven't had counts this high since before I started meds back in '95.  Its weird. This has also CLEARLY been the most stressful year of my life, with so many bad crappy things happening all at once.  You'd think my CD4 would stay put, but it has soared to 746 through all of this.  Just be patient!

Time to go dream about Iceman........He said my birthday is going to be a blast.  I am getting a little excited tonight!

~ Cindy
HIV+ since '93, 1/12 - CD4 785 and undet.   WOO-HOO!!

Offline camille07

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #97 on: November 13, 2007, 07:55:54 AM »
Hello ladies-

I've been sleeping a lot the last few days and made it impossible to focus on anything.  I've been fighting just a seasonal cold, but I've been thinking of you all.

Trying to catch up on the post but it will take a little time.

CIN-  OMG, what an amazing story. After everything and the ice man can relate cause of the Hep C.  WOW.  Can you imagine what has been going on in his mind the whole time.  It would it make a great play.  With everything you've been through, you deserve it girl!!!!

I got my new numbers yesterday:

Previous was   VL-650       cd4 296

yesterday        VL-980  cd4 410   so felt good. 

my vl when it peaked was 6,000 but always remained really low.  My CD4 definitely changes especially with all the stress I've experienced. 

Hope all is well with you guys......GREAT avatar BT! 

One more thing, its almost my second year anniversay since my dx....it blows my mind some days.

Love and hugs, Cammie
« Last Edit: November 13, 2007, 07:57:30 AM by camille07 »

Offline BT65

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #98 on: November 13, 2007, 08:33:29 AM »
***Going outside, looking toward the sky*** Queen, Queen, where are you?   Come on, GF!  We all miss you!

Seekay, I really couldn't recommend a good online university.  I've seen advertisements for that one Cin mentioned, but the price she mentioned is way more than a regular university would cost.  And who can afford that?  I, myself, need hands-on type of stuff, with a live teacher.  So I really couldn't recommend any reputable on-line universities.  Good for you though for thinking about going back to school!  I know I'm glad I'm going.

Viv, it sounds like you're really busy right now.  Busy time of year with the reportcards and all.  You must have a ton of patience to teach so many kids with so many different personalities.

Cin, I'm excited already to hear about how your birthday with Iceman goes!  That's tomorrow, is that right?  I would be through the roof with exciitement.  I'm so happy that you found him, well actually that you guys found each other.  You know, he was probably full of anxiety about telling you about his hep c.  So you probably made it a lot more comfortable for him.  I think that is so cool.  Like I said before, I have a few friends who have hep c.  They were IV drug users, but they have all been clean for multiple years.  They seem to get along very well.  One thing I found interesting is that when the monitor people who have hep c blood work, they check a viral load also.  I don't know exactly how that works, though.  Does Iceman have his usual hep c bloodwork done regularly?  Just curious. 

Cam-great to see you posting!  We miss you!  Good news about your bloodwork also.  You know, CD4s, like Cin said, take their own time in climbing.  I had a very low one (less than 100) for like three years in the early 90's.  But the fact that they are going up, however slowly, is good news.  Please continue to check in with us and let us know how you're doing!

Today I'm going to sort through some of my things and get some Goodwill bags going.  I do this every so often.  I don't do it for tax purposes, because I hardly ever file taxes, although I probably will have to this year because of my month's long employment.  Not sure about that yet.  I just like to get things "cleaned out" and donate stuff.  My sponsor will be taking my old computer once the hard drive is wiped clean.  A friend of mine who has a disc (the same kind the FBI uses) that will do that will be over Saturday so I can wipe it off.  I'm just a little paranoid about giving it away without doing that first, as I've used my debit card on there.  I wouldn't want anyone to get ahold of that information and have my bank account wiped out.  I remember when my second husband did that to me.  It was after he started using IV drugs again.  One night, while I was asleep, he took my ATM card, found my PIN number and went from ATM to ATM and wiped my whole bank account out (this was before the days that banks limited how much one could take out in one day).  That really sucked.  I wouldn't want to go through that again.  Other than that, I might look at starting a paper for my psychology class.  This week marks the 1/2 way point for my classes.  Wow, time goes by so fast. 

Cin, if you're still IM'ing Queen, please encourage her to come back here and let us know how she's doing.  I don't expect you to reveal anything you guys are talking about, but it sure would be nice to hear from her!  Thanks.

I hope all you ladies have a good day-
I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

tendai

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #99 on: November 13, 2007, 12:44:44 PM »
Hie ladies
this thread is so full of news!

Cindy - your candles story was hilarious, i'm glad u're having such a blast with your man. imagine if u'd set yourself on fire for love.. :D

Em  congrats on the adoption. hope all the paperwork and stuff is sorted out by now and she'll be with u soon

Cammie - great results girl! i passed my 2 year mark on april 5 and almost 'celebrated' with starting meds.  fortunately my doctor said i didnt need to coz my 109 count was a blip.

Queen - hows things? i hope u're ok. its never an easy road when it comes to love..

Drag - watch 'meet the parents' and meet the fockers..tips on what not to do! but its great that u're meeting his parents. do i hear wedding bells in the near future? ;)

BT - congrats on the new computer and tooth. me i wouldve gone around with the biggest smile showing people my missing tooth. just to see their reactions ;D

confused - i hope u and your husband are talking again. i doont think i could live in such a tense situation , my blood pressure would hit the roof

me my weekend was alright spent it at my uncles house having this family ceremony. as for men, i disclosed to an old boyfriend but he doesnt believe me!!! there i was all relieved that i had had a good reaction to disclosure and after a great date he texts me saying that he knew i was joking.  ??? do i have to go around with lab results in my bag so that people believe me?




Offline sunseeker

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #100 on: November 13, 2007, 12:46:23 PM »
HI Ladies

Well my LL did make it over and things were good.  Now I am freaking out.  We had sex and the condom broke.  Normally I don't think that I would be to concerned since I am undetectable but I am since there was a little blood on the condom because I thought I had finished my cycle.  I have called my doctor but am waiting for a call back.  Any words of advise?  

Offline MOONLIGHT1114

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #101 on: November 13, 2007, 01:16:43 PM »
I'm going to read the posts now, but if no one minds, I'd like to start the next thread tonight, since I'm a November girl and all!

OK, going to read now.....

Hi Sun, just read your post about the condom mishap.  I guess we have to get technical here.  I had a condom break once and my doctor asked me if the tip was still covered.  Actually, it was, as the tear was on the side, about the size of a quarter.  I was asking if my BF could get PEP bec I was so nervous.  The doc said it wasn't necessary after asking where the tear was, and when my last cycle was.  Also, not sure if you kept going after it broke, or if you felt it when it happened and immediately stopped.

I don't know how personal you want to get in the Forums, but maybe post this in "Living With..." so that the guys can chime in too.  Perhaps call the docs office just to be safe.  Without having more details, its tough to figure out if you need to worry or not.  Hang in there.

~ Cindy
« Last Edit: November 13, 2007, 01:28:28 PM by MOONLIGHT1114 »
HIV+ since '93, 1/12 - CD4 785 and undet.   WOO-HOO!!

Offline Winiroo

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #102 on: November 13, 2007, 01:26:33 PM »
I dont mind. I was catching up with my reading while stuffing new years envelopes for my boss.
I'll contribute more eventually.

Wendy


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Offline BT65

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #103 on: November 13, 2007, 02:29:01 PM »
Cin, have you been im'ing Queen?  If you are, please encourage her to come back to us!  We miss her!  Also, you starting the next thread is fine.  Can't wait!

Tendai, good to hear from you.  How have you been doing?  I don't know why you ex- didn't believe you.  Like we would really lie about having HIV.....

Wini, good to hear from you also.  Yes, please check in when you have time.

As for me, I went and got my cat a Christmas stocking and I also got my daughter a $100 VISA gift card for Christmas.  She lives in Washington (state) and I know she can use it.  Other than that, it's very warm here today-in the 60's.  How unusual.  They say by the end of the week, we could get some snow.  Oh, I got myself some gloves today in preparation for the winter weather.  I want this season to be special for myself and the people around me.  This will be the first holiday without my mum.  That makes me very sad. :'(  I still miss her so damn much.  I always talked to her in the morning, every day.  Now there's no one to talk to.  Most people are busy getting ready for work or whatever.  Well, no one except my cat. ;)  As far as decorating the house, I put up about six decorations, and some on the outside.  I just don't feel like dragging everything out and then having to put it back after Christmas.  There's only me and my cat.  I might put up a manger scene outside, I'm not sure yet.  I would just be a little worried it would either blow away or someone would take it.  Maybe I should just stick with putting it in here.  I will put it up though, since it is the celebration of Christ's birthday.  Now I have to go down the basement and dig it out.  I just hate going down there-spiders and all.  I hope all you ladies are having a good day.  I'm sure I'll check in later.  Peace-
I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

Offline MOONLIGHT1114

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Re: Dating Thread Part X - Love, Lust & Leg-humpers
« Reply #104 on: November 13, 2007, 05:33:43 PM »
I started a new thread, GFs.  Go to Part XI.   ;D
HIV+ since '93, 1/12 - CD4 785 and undet.   WOO-HOO!!

 


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