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Author Topic: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures  (Read 30588 times)

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Offline srmn98

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Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« on: October 24, 2007, 07:34:23 PM »
Hi All. I thought I would take Queen Akasha up on her idea of another dating thread.

I read the forum quite a bit but don't post so much -- I guess I might be overdue for an introduction.

My name is Sara. I found out I was positive in October of 2006. I'm 31 years old.

I've really enjoyed reading all of your stories and I feel like I know you all a little bit already. Reading the boards brings me a lot of hope, and makes me feel much less alone. I know one other woman in "real" life who is positive, so this community means a lot to me.

I'm in a relationship (it has been about 9 months) now but it is somewhat tumultuous. I told him about my status before anything happened -- he did handle the news amazingly well at first. He was very persistent and still very interested in dating me. Over the past 9 months, things have been up and down. Sex freaks him out, partially because of my status, and partially because of some childhood issues he is dealing with. It has been extremely difficult to sort everything out -- I find myself wondering, what is related to the HIV ? What is related to whether or not we like each other, or more specifically, if he is truely into me ? What has to do with his own issues ?  It's tough knowing and up to this point, the HIV is always somewhere in the back of his mind when we are intimate.

So things are difficult. I'm terrified of losing this man that I do love. I'm terrified of dating again if things don't work out between us. I'm terrified of staying together today and having things not work out later.

So in the spirit of a dating forum, I just wanted to share part of my story. As a single (non-married) woman, I fortunately or unfortunately (not sure yet !) see dating as a process -- and even when you are dating just one person, it does seem to take a long time to figure out if things will last and who the person you are dating really is. Maybe we learn a little about ourselves in the process. I'm learning that despite a difficult history with men, I'm still hopeful to find a long-time love.

Thanks, and hope to hear more of your stories.

:)

Sara

Offline Queen Tokelove

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Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #1 on: October 25, 2007, 12:37:39 AM »
I am surprised indeed, Sara. I have seen you around on the forums and I don't know why but I thought you were a guy. Glad you introduced yourself. I tend to do that with certain forum members, I don't know why. I thought Em was black. I guess my radar is way the hell off... ;D But then the majority of the time I'm on here I am a bit buzzed... ;) Good job with the title too.

So you love your guy huh? After 9 months at that, pay me no mind, I just usually have a whole artillery around my heart... ;D Sorry to hear things are kinda rocky right now. How is the communication between the 2 of you? Since he knows you are poz have you showed him around the site? As you know it is quite informative. And he can read some of the posts from people who are in relationships with negative people. I think you are going to have to discuss his fears with him someday. Keep us posted on how things progress.

As for me, I saw my shy guy for a few moments tonight. Dragonette, I think I am going to run over there and give you a BIG FAT kiss. Rico loves wrestling like I do. We sat for the longest time just talking about last week's shows. At least I know I can watch Smackdown on Friday and he'll be cheering right along with me. I also got a kiss too.....Wooooo Hoooooo.....Things might just work out. More details on Friday. ;)
Started Atripla/Ziagen on 9/13/07.
10/31/07 CD4-265 VL- undetectable
2/6/08 CD4- 401 VL- undetectable
5/7/08 CD4- 705 VL- undetectable
6/4/08 CD4- 775 VL- undetectable
8/6/08 CD4- 805 VL- undetectable
11/13/08 CD4- 774 VL--undetectable
2/4/09  CD4- 484  VL- 18,000 (2 months off meds)
3/3/09---Starting Back on Meds---
4/27/09 CD4- 664 VL-- undetectable
6/17/09 CD4- 438 VL- 439
8/09 CD4- 404 VL- 1,600
01-22-10-- CD4- 525 VL- 59,000
Cherish the simple things life has to offer

The Royal Blog

Offline Dragonette

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Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #2 on: October 25, 2007, 04:12:44 AM »
Rico loves wrestling like I do. We sat for the longest time just talking about last week's shows. At least I know I can watch Smackdown on Friday and he'll be cheering right along with me. I also got a kiss too.....Wooooo Hoooooo.....Things might just work out. More details on Friday. ;)

I have a huge smile on my face right now, what a great way to start the workday (pretty f***ing late cos I caught up on the missed sleep from the last days). I'll just go get dressed now, you made my day.

Nice to meet you Sara! I got some thoughts on what you wrote but no time to express them right now. Glad you joined us...
"If you keep one foot in yesterday, and one in tomorrow, you piss all over today". Betty Tacy

tendai

  • Guest
Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #3 on: October 25, 2007, 05:38:43 AM »
Hie Sara! nice to meet you.
 i've also got a difficult history with men.  i was reeling from an hiv rejection (sort of) these past weeks but i think i've mended now. i'm thinking dating poz men is more simpler in the long run. but 9 months is quite a while and i agree with queen that you need to communicate with him and all. i'm sorry i dont have any good advice on this being so lousy at relationships myself but i wish u the best with your man
Drag, i'm glad u got some sleep at last, i hope u feel much better now.
Queen I love wrestling so much (Batista's my favourite- and i pray he doesnt use steroids he's got so muscular) great way to have fun.
I once had a shy guy asking me out and he was just TOO shy. so soft spoken he was almost inaudible, always biting his lips and acting all gentle and feminine. I'm ashamed to say i almost tore his head off one day when he called me in the middle of the night stammering goodness knows what. had he been nearby i might have landed him one.  he was just too much.  but if Rico loves wrestling then he's not that shy.
Cin, how u feeling today?

edited to remove potentially upsetting info - sorry betty
« Last Edit: October 25, 2007, 07:58:08 AM by tendai »

Offline BT65

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Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #4 on: October 25, 2007, 06:16:58 AM »
Good morning ladies-

Only a couple days to go until the weekend.  Yay!  And tomorrow is my first payday.  Me and a friend are going out to eat.  Oh, hey!  The two classes I just finished (Philosophy and Counseling Theories) I both got A's in.  I am too happy.  I started new classes last night.  "Child and Adolescent Psychology."  We are going to have sooooo much work in that class.  I feel my social life (what there is of one) dwindling.  Tonight I start "College Algebra."  I'm not looking forward to that at all.  It took me two years to pass algebra in high school.  Of course, that could have had something to do with me being on drugs then also. :D

Sara, glad to get to know you.  Good luck with your b/f.  I agree that some day his feelings of fear should be dealt with.  Maybe if you let him see some of the threads on here, he would feel better.  "Women and HIV questions" is a good one to look at.  I think that's one that Goderator Ann posted some useful information in.  Not sure, I would have to look and I really don't have time this morning.  But that might alleviate a few of his fears.  Is it serious?  If it is, you might want to think about dual counseling. 

Hey Queen!  A kiss, eh?  I'm so happy for you!  And he likes wrestling!  Wow, that's really great.  I'm glad you've got someone to watch it with.  Is he a good kisser?  That makes my morning.

Cin, I hope the rain cut through the pollen for you and that you're feeling better. 

Tendai, I can't believe people would do that to their children either.  I could've gone without the visual idea this morning, but I understand it was probably shocking and you needed to share it with us.  Hope it doesn't rock you too hard.  You've got to learn how to detach, even if it's from something as graphic and horrible as that.  Otherwise, it can drive you crazy.

Well ladies, I'm off to exercise.  I'm still smoke-free.  Now if I can drop the 10 lbs I've gained since I quit, I'll be happy.  Some of my pants are getting tight and I don't want to keep going out and buying bigger ones.  I want to lose this extra flab.  Hopefully the exercise will help it.  I do alright in the morning and early afternoon.  It's the evening that I get like unsatisfiably hungry.  If anyone's got tips on how to deal with that, please let me know.  Have a good one ladies-

I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

Offline Dragonette

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Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #5 on: October 25, 2007, 12:46:18 PM »

Hi everybody,
This is my first post using hands free voice recognition. I still have to train it but itís going much better than I thought it would, but I still have to go and correct things manually.
So now Iím going to try to use it to save my broken wrists. Anyway I just wanted to respond to Tendaiís a horror story Iíve heard a similar things itís just so horrible that itís hard to believe, but apparently there is evidence suggesting that these things are true & even happen in Europe. The mind and just cannot stretch that far to accept that these things are happening, so I just think you should put it out of your mind because thereís so many awful things going on in the world that if we thought about all of them we would just go crazy. I always think that God has been considered, back in Biblical days, as responsible for things such as earthquakes floods and volcanic eruptions, but for most of the awful things that happen nowadays only humans are responsible. Weíre even becoming responsible for the natural disasters because we cause them ourselves by destroying the environment! So just please put it out of your mind and really sorry you had to be exposed to this.
Cindy I hope youíre feeling better and that you would hear from your prospective employers soon. Itís encouraging to hear that they were so late in responding because of a legitimate reason. Iím really praying for you that everything will work out OK. Itís high time that it did. Youíve earned it a long time ago already.
Sara, I am still thinking about what you wrote, I'll let it simmer for a while longer.
Betty, this is so cool that youíre not smoking. How long has it been now? Since I started on the PIs, except for the first day, I have noticed that I donít feel like smoking in all. In fact I find it repulsive. So, I decided to ride that wave out and see how it goes. I didnít have much of the habit before as I mentioned, because I only use to smoke at night (unless I was on holiday, in which case I would let myself go). Speaking of addictions, this morning right after I first responded on this thread, I opened my placeís door to go to work, and on the staircase landing there was a woman shooting up. I was so shocked that I just shut the door and just paced back and forth in my apartment and till she left. But they obviously scared her, because when I went downstairs a few minutes later and was unlocking my bike I saw her walking up and down the street looking probably for a better location to do it. I donít actually live in a bad neighborhood, there are a lot of families and students about, but just down from my house is a railway bridge underneath which I often spot people dealing drugs. I hope I am not offending anyone by telling this story. I mean I have nothing but compassion for the people that I forced to do this (unless they break into my house or do something harmful like that). My physiotherapist argued the other day that they should give free heroin to the addicts here like they do in Switzerland to eliminate the crime that goes with addiction. But I donít know, that sounds kind of hopeless. I donít know enough about it to know if thatís a good idea or not but my gut feeling is that it would be kind of like giving up on them.
So anyway this voice recognition thing is taking much longer than typing something but it sure is easier on me. I hope you all having a good day.
And Queen, am still smilingÖ
Hugs,
"If you keep one foot in yesterday, and one in tomorrow, you piss all over today". Betty Tacy

Offline MOONLIGHT1114

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  • Cheech 2.2.94 - 4.23.10 We miss you so much!
Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #6 on: October 25, 2007, 06:48:59 PM »
GFs, I am so tired AND its TV night, so I will be in the recliner, glued from 8pm until 11pm, VCRs rolling, too, lol! 

I took some different medicine yesterday and its helping but I am just in a funk.  Had my weekly massage today and my neck is in so much better shape than it was last Spring.

I am just bummed cause I didn't want to be alone for Halloween, bday, holidays.....This is my favorite time of year and I am going to be a fucking hermit.  Sigh.

Queen, very happy to see you have something in common with Lovelips Rico!  GF got a kiss goodnight, my gosh, lookout, its the 4th of July up at GFs place!  LOL  I am very happy for you.  One kiss can make all of the difference in the world, trust me!

Keeping it short and sweet, more later.

~ Cindy
HIV+ since '93, 1/12 - CD4 785 and undet.   WOO-HOO!!

Offline Queen Tokelove

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Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #7 on: October 25, 2007, 10:39:26 PM »
Hello Ladies----

I am feeling on cloud 9 about now. Maybe it started with the kiss from Rico but I did an online interview for someone working on a paper for school. Basically, it was about how hiv affects African American women. It felt really good to be able to tell my story. I just hope she gets a good grade. I was able to help her and the interview itself helped me...

Dragonette-- I'm glad I was able to make your day. Who knows I just may be able to do it again after Friday night. I think it is going to be interesting.

Cindy--- I don't do the trick or treat thing anymore, not cause I got older but because no one wants to give me candy... :D But some witchy things may be happening around the house. My roomie has Halloween decorations all over the house. And we have our resident black cat, Boogie Man and besides him 3 other cats. So, I think we got Halloween covered over here. Another thing that will be a first for me in awhile is that I'll be able to actually celebrate X-mas, I haven't done that in awhile.

I am off....
Started Atripla/Ziagen on 9/13/07.
10/31/07 CD4-265 VL- undetectable
2/6/08 CD4- 401 VL- undetectable
5/7/08 CD4- 705 VL- undetectable
6/4/08 CD4- 775 VL- undetectable
8/6/08 CD4- 805 VL- undetectable
11/13/08 CD4- 774 VL--undetectable
2/4/09  CD4- 484  VL- 18,000 (2 months off meds)
3/3/09---Starting Back on Meds---
4/27/09 CD4- 664 VL-- undetectable
6/17/09 CD4- 438 VL- 439
8/09 CD4- 404 VL- 1,600
01-22-10-- CD4- 525 VL- 59,000
Cherish the simple things life has to offer

The Royal Blog

Offline sunseeker

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Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #8 on: October 26, 2007, 12:04:04 AM »
Hi Ladies

I have been on cloud 9 since my wonderful date with my hunky Latino.  In fact we have had another date since Sundays meeting and he spent the night both nights.  Not what you guys are thinking we feel asleep cuddling on the couch and nothing more.  I ended up telling that I was positive and says he is OK with it.  I was still a little worried and we talked last night for over an hour and today we text messaged all day long.  He is taking a class one night a week and wrote me a text message to say Hi when he was on a break.  So I am hoping that things continue to progress at a even steady pace. 

Queen-  I must have missed a post some where along the way.  Who is Rico?  I guess that makes two of us who are cloud 9

Moon- Sorry to hear about the recent turn of events with Stone.  Its his loss and someone elses gain.  I know that does not make it things feel better, but you are a beautiful women and like you have told me many times in the past the right person is out there waiting for you. 


Hi Sara nice to meet you.  I hope that things work out with your boyfriend.  I think communication is the key to any relationship.  Nonetheless we are glad to have you on the forums and I hope you will find it as a place of comfort and a place to vent.  We are all here for each other.

Betty-enjoy your evening out and your first paycheck.  Good job on the no smoking. 

To the rest of you ladies I hope you are all doing well.  I am off to bed tomorrow I have a 12 hour day.



Offline Queen Tokelove

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Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #9 on: October 26, 2007, 02:57:57 AM »
Hey Sun--- You did miss a post, it was in the last thread. A friend of mine hooked me up with a friend of hers who is kinda shy and a Latino as well. Cindy has dubbed him Rico and I'm sticking with that name because it is easy to remember... ;D I thought there would be probs because of his shyness but I don't think so anymore since we both love wrestling. He is suppose to come over sometime today to spend time with me and we'll prolly end up watching wrestling together.

So you gotta share cloud 9 girlie. I am still happy for you and glad things are going well since you disclosed to him. I bet all that snuggling feels nice. So am I to assume the Cop got kicked to the curb. I can feel your glow way over here.... ;D

I need to get my beauty sleep for my day tomorrow. I will keep you all posted..... :-*
Started Atripla/Ziagen on 9/13/07.
10/31/07 CD4-265 VL- undetectable
2/6/08 CD4- 401 VL- undetectable
5/7/08 CD4- 705 VL- undetectable
6/4/08 CD4- 775 VL- undetectable
8/6/08 CD4- 805 VL- undetectable
11/13/08 CD4- 774 VL--undetectable
2/4/09  CD4- 484  VL- 18,000 (2 months off meds)
3/3/09---Starting Back on Meds---
4/27/09 CD4- 664 VL-- undetectable
6/17/09 CD4- 438 VL- 439
8/09 CD4- 404 VL- 1,600
01-22-10-- CD4- 525 VL- 59,000
Cherish the simple things life has to offer

The Royal Blog

Offline Dragonette

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Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #10 on: October 26, 2007, 04:08:10 AM »
I have been on cloud 9 since my wonderful date with my hunky Latino.  In fact we have had another date since Sundays meeting and he spent the night both nights.  Not what you guys are thinking we feel asleep cuddling on the couch and nothing more.  I ended up telling that I was positive and says he is OK with it.  I was still a little worried and we talked last night for over an hour and today we text messaged all day long.  He is taking a class one night a week and wrote me a text message to say Hi when he was on a break.  So I am hoping that things continue to progress at a even steady pace.

Awsome!!

Betty, I forgot to congratulate you on the first paycheck. Hope you enjoyed last night.

Lots of love everyone,

"If you keep one foot in yesterday, and one in tomorrow, you piss all over today". Betty Tacy

Offline BT65

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Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #11 on: October 26, 2007, 06:35:24 AM »
Good morning ladies-

So, we've got two ladies on here who have Latino lovers?  My first husband was Mexican and extremely classically good-looking.  At one of the places I worked at when we were married, every time he'd come in to pick me up, all the ladies would be like "damn, Betty!  He's gorgeous!"  But, alas, he was an alcoholic and physically abusive.  Hell, his whole family (except for his oldest sister) were alcoholics.  I've never, in my whole addictive life, seen any other person drink like they used to drink.  I'll never forget one morning, taking his oldest brother to the drug store so he could get a bottle.  He shook violently all the way in and bought a fifth of gin, a two liter of wine and a case of beer.  Then he would get home, proceed to drink, puke up blood into a bucket, take a swig of Maalox and keep on drinking.  Even their mother drank like that.  So it definitely ran in the genes, as well as being a learned behavior.  Anyway, too much drama for so early in the morning. 

TGIF!  Only have to make it until 2:00 then it's weekend time! Also, I got A's in both the classes I just finished with (Philosophy and Counseling Theories).  So I was pretty happy about that.  But I feel my GPA plummeting.....I started an algebra class last night.  I haven't been in a math class in 30 years and when I did take it in high school (algebra) it took me two years to pass it.  Even then, I only passed it with a low C because the teacher was tutoring me.  Everything the teacher covered last night, I don't have a clue on.  I just hope I pass this.  The other class I'm taking is Child and Adolescent Psychology.  In that class we have four research papers, a midterm exam and a final exam.  And there's only eight weeks of classes!  Talk about pressure......Please send all the good energy possible.  I sure will be needing it. 

Last night, after class, I stopped and got a pack of cigarettes.  It was either that or I was going to call my doctor and try to get a tranquilizer.  And that just isn't an option for me.  Those things fucked me up really bad (among other things) and I can't afford that.  But by the time I left class last night, I was having flashes of light coming out of my eyes, like I used to get when I had migraines.  I don't plan on making smoking a habit again.  I felt too good off of the cigs.  And I wasn't constantly running out of money.  The price of cigarettes is so outrageous, who can afford to smoke.  It actually makes no sense anyway, to pay for something that's killing you.  I think I'll throw the rest of the pack out. 

I hope all you ladies have a good day.  Cin, how's the stuffy nose and coughing?
I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

Offline Dragonette

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Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #12 on: October 26, 2007, 07:10:44 AM »
Hi Ladies,

I don't know if Spanish qualifies as Latino, if it does then count me in as a 3rd...

Cigarettes, I have had an off-on relationship with them for years. when I first started I was really young and I very quickly was smoking 1.5 packs a day, by the time I was 18-20 it was minimum 2 sometimes 3 a day and of the strongest kind (Rothman's etc). These were my years of doing other drugs and drinking as well. I can't beleive I could stand that (cough, puke). Then when I was 21 I started doing a physical job and moved down to lighter cigarettes and smaller amount till finally I quit and stayed off for 4 years. I became a jogger and was really fit for the first time in my life. When the first guy I trusted dumped me and I found out I was pregant I started smoking again, alsob/c I wanted to "poison" the fetus so I would have no choice to abort b/c I didn't really want to but he was pressuring me so hard and came from the US to take me to the comittee (you have to get it approved) and the clinic. How fucked up... I stayed smoking for 4 years, I also begun smoking a lot of pot again. But when I was 28 I quit again and stayed off until I met the guy that I was with when I was diagnosed. Needless to say upon diagnosis I started smoking a packet or more a day but that dwindled down eventually to 1-3 a day over the last year (the 2nd of my diagnosis). Now & again I don't smoke for a week or longer, the last week was like that. My BF smokes, usually 5-8 a day. I want him to quit but I know better than to pressure him when he is so stressed with work as he is now... I have spent my life with smoking parents, my mum even smoked when I was in her womb. And chainsmoking grandparents. My grandpa would look after me and he was literally never without a cigarette in his mouth, as was my nanny!
As bad as smoking is, if you can keep it down to the occasional ciggie, well then... they say our meds already amount to 3-4 a day damage-wise... I am not justifying smoking but I just don't want you to beat yourself over it. Or maybe get on Chantix again if you feel that you are slipping to more than the occasional cigarette into addiciton. It's a tough one, I know... I used to buy a pack "just for one cigarette" and then break all the remaining cigarettes b/c I smoked 3 instead of one... that's like throwing away 4 Euro.

Good luck with everything, the classes... I think it's awsome you are there. Maybe you can explain to the teacher, after all it's not like you are fresh out of highschool, what does algebra have to do with councelling anyway?! Stats I understand... though still dislike.

Cindy, how are you doing? You are missed here. I know there is not always time to write, just know one more person is thinking of you.

Hugs,





"If you keep one foot in yesterday, and one in tomorrow, you piss all over today". Betty Tacy

Offline emeraldize

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Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #13 on: October 26, 2007, 07:35:53 AM »
Sun I ended up telling that I was positive and says he is OK with it. Congrats. GQ When you least expect it... :-*  ;)BT Anyone available at school to tutor you in math? You'll settle cigs when  ready. Em

tendai

  • Guest
Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #14 on: October 26, 2007, 09:47:56 AM »
sun i'm so happy for you YAY!!  ;D
BT good luck with the studies. i'm thinking of going back to college next year, hopefully i'll be financially able to manage.
Todays friday and somebody's got a date with smackdown and her latino man. cant wait for the update!
have a good weekend ladies. see u Monday!

Offline Queen Tokelove

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Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #15 on: October 26, 2007, 03:23:23 PM »
Betty--- Don't beat yourself up too hard for smoking again. You have done so well with quitting that I am sure you can start again. I would love to get on Chantix but my doc says it affects your hearing...I have been trying to find proof of that but hasn't yet. I would like to quit smoking too. I am just tired of it but then if I try cold turkey, I become the bitch from hell and would eat everything in sight...Not a pretty picture.. :D Maybe you can ask your teacher for some help with algebra.  I know I sucked at it too when I was in school and what are you really gonna need it for later on down the road? So what ya spend your check on? Some new clothes, dinner date? Don't get discouraged, things will come full circle for you.

Rico says he drinks on occassion and that is fine with me. What I hate is when someone has to get up looking for a drink, that is a complete turn off for me. I drink on occassion myself but prefers the girly stuff most of the time but every now and then will have a shot of tequila and a Corona to wash it down with. But as you all well know, I prefer to have the green... ;)

I hope Cindy is doing much better with those allergies or whatever. I think she is feeling a bit bummed about Stone but like I told her, it is his loss. I'm sure someone will come along who will sweep her off her feet and appreciate her.

Em, how is the adoption thing coming along? You have been like Casper on the thread lately or very cryptic but I guess something is better than nothing. Would like to know how you are doing is all. The same goes for Christy, has anyone heard from her away from the forums? I hope it is just a matter of her being busy working and not that her brother is driving her crazy. Remember he was suppose to show up and I think that was about the time she disappeared, just hopes he is not stressing her out.

I have to go get blood work done on Monday which I am not happy about because I will not have my vl back in time for my appointment. I also see on the order that I have to tinkle in the cup and am wondering what that is about because usually only my primary doctor asks for things like that. At least I don't have to do a fasting this time around....

That is about it for me. I have a few other things to do before Rico shows up....Wish me luck ladies...
Started Atripla/Ziagen on 9/13/07.
10/31/07 CD4-265 VL- undetectable
2/6/08 CD4- 401 VL- undetectable
5/7/08 CD4- 705 VL- undetectable
6/4/08 CD4- 775 VL- undetectable
8/6/08 CD4- 805 VL- undetectable
11/13/08 CD4- 774 VL--undetectable
2/4/09  CD4- 484  VL- 18,000 (2 months off meds)
3/3/09---Starting Back on Meds---
4/27/09 CD4- 664 VL-- undetectable
6/17/09 CD4- 438 VL- 439
8/09 CD4- 404 VL- 1,600
01-22-10-- CD4- 525 VL- 59,000
Cherish the simple things life has to offer

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Offline srmn98

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Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #16 on: October 26, 2007, 05:11:05 PM »
Hi All,

I just have to say, I love reading all of your posts. Thanks for the welcome.

Queen Akasha -  Oh no, you thought I was a dude !!!!  LMAO. The internet is funny that way. I think I'm a little guarded with what I write online because I have not disclosed to so many people, my parents included. So maybe that makes me come off a little but aloof. Love that you got a kiss. :)  and Good luck tonight ....

Smoking seems to be on topic. I'm struggling with that one too. Why is it so tough ?  And why are we so hard on ourselves about it ? I try to take it one day at a time --  i.e. I'm not smoking today (well-- not today actually - lol)  It has helped me cut down a lot. I was never a smoker but somehow the stress of the last 2 years has gotten to me and I picked up the habit. But I agree, bettytacy, don't beat yourself up about it -- smoking one or two doesn't put you back to square zero, you can pick up where you were before you bought that pack.

Tendai - rejection sucks but I am glad you are feeling better. When I'm feeling optimistic, I tell myself that disclosure is a good way to weed out the bad ones ...  but that's just when I am feeling optimistic. ;)

Dragonette -- that's a COOL name. :)

sunseeker -- isn't text messaging great for dating ? Especially when you are just starting out. I hope you hear lots more from him.

And Cindy, nice to meet ya.

Things here with me are going OK. I'm still really bummed about my man -- he's completely emotionally overloaded and doesn't have much room for me right now. We are hanging out tonight so I am hopeful that it will be fun and that I won't be sad and trying to talk about things. It's such a catch-22  --- I want to talk about things but then I get tired of it and just want to enjoy his company too, you know ? And tomorrow night I'm going to a gf's party ... so that will definitely get the spirits up. Friends are great for that. :)

ciao,

Sara

Offline BT65

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Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #17 on: October 26, 2007, 07:29:02 PM »
Wow, Queen, good luck!!!  I will be waiting anxiously tomorrow to hear how things went.  I know they'll be alright.  I also wonder what happened to Cristy.  I hope it's not her brother too.  I hope we hear from her soon.  I actually threw out the pack of smokes I bought last night, but then bought another one tonight.  I feel really stressed out right now, and I'm not sure what else to do about it.  It's easier not to smoke in the morning, because that's the time I usually exercise.  I'm still on the Chantix, so I'm not sure if any part of the cigarette is affecting my brain anyway.  It just calms me down a little right now and it's the lesser of any of the evils I could be doing right now. 

I wonder how Cammie is doing also.  Haven't heard from her lately.  Yoohoo, Cammie?  Come on ladies!  You guys have to check in.  Hope Cin is feeling better. 

Welcome to the new ladies.  And btw, yes, that is me in the avatar.  It's kind of fuzzy, but it's me.  Hope everyone has a great night-
I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

Offline MOONLIGHT1114

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Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #18 on: October 27, 2007, 02:37:53 AM »
Hi GFs~

I wanted to wish BT a Happy 2nd Anniversary!  :)  Read your other thread, so good job with that!  ;)

I know I haven't been myself here lately.  I have been under the weather for three weeks, unemployment income will be non-existent soon and Stone has blown me off into the wind.  I need to get back to the real me, I'm just a little nervous about doing it, but I need to live my life as I see fit.  Besides, venting here is a healthy outlet and I have been missing that lately.

So, I disclosed to Jay not too long ago.  We had seen each other a few times, mainly as friends, meeting for burgers and conversation, and long walks.  I have stepped lightly where he is concerned because he filed for divorce and I didn't want to get my hopes up.  I also wanted to give him his space if he still needed it.  We were talking the evening of 10/17 and I steered the conversation towards disclosure.  No boo-hooing, no drama, just a few tears and a very down-to-earth conversation.  He was shocked but appeared very calm.  I gave him the Transmission thread and we went over it together.  I told him that since he was single now, he couldn't be too safe.

So many threads talk about the stigma of HIV that exists today, and I feel that each time I disclose to someone, I am promoting awareness.  I have always said, "The virus stops with me,"  that I won't pass it on to anyone.  If I can help someone to arm themselves with enough info to protect themselves then I feel that I have done a good thing.  Needless to say, Jay's eyes are opened wide at this point, and I am happy that I could do this for him.

I disclosed to Doc a few weeks ago online, and he is fine with it, knows a lot on the subject, as I thought he might.  He irks me though, has asked me at late hours to drive to his house, a few guys have done this.  Hello?  I haven't dated anyone except Stone and more recently Jay, so if a guy expects me to go and see him at a moment's notice after not seeing him in a long while, its not going to happen.  They just don't get the fact that I feel I deserve some respect. 

So, I have about six neggies that have asked me out for the next week.  Its not just raining rain over here.  I do this every time though.  I feel this need to connect with other men, hoping to find one good one, the one, in the bunch, that might accept me just as I am, and take the time to get to know me.  It just ticks me off that I am single when I feel I have so much to give and I am alone.  It makes me so impatient!  Unfortunately, I feel like Stone never got to see the true me, as our relationship started off on the wrong foot.  I tried to be OK with it, but I wasn't.  Us females tend to get more emotionally invested early on, and it was driving me nuts.  I know Stone is reading every word here tonight, and that's OK.  I can't live my life hoping he'll come back and try to compromise with me to make things better for the two of us.  I have been sick and tired for three weeks, and all we have done is emailed each other one time each.  His silence says that he has moved on, its time for me to do the same.

So, look for me to be posting my thoughts here just like I did back in June and July.  I owe it to myself to open up to you ladies.  You have all been so supportive and I have been so closed off.  I'm here for all of you.  Thanks for listening tonight.  :)

~ Cindy
HIV+ since '93, 1/12 - CD4 785 and undet.   WOO-HOO!!

Offline Dragonette

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Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #19 on: October 27, 2007, 04:40:35 AM »
Hello ladies,

Betty, you look great. I have not read that thread Cindy mentioned, I'll check it when I am done. But I am guessing what it is about, so CONGRATULATIONS.

You mentioned that you don't feel like smoking in the morning, b/c that's when you excercise. Maybe you can try to excercise (lightly) in the evening as well, just to break the habit. The evening is the time I let myself go too, maybe it's b/c there is nothing more waiting afrterwards, no chores [or at least I pretend there aren't any and shut down for the night], maybe cos I am mentaly weaker at night, I always get into dark thought, I am also obviously tirder. I either eat too much, or have a smoke. I think 90% of the people are like that. If you know that you can predict it.

Or put the cigarettes somewhere where it would be an effort to smoke, you might still smoke, but that'll make sure you really want it. Like in the trunk of your car, so when you want to smoke you have to get up, get dressed, walk outside... and b/c they are in the trunk you won't smoke when driving. I don't know these might be dumb ideas but I am throwing them around. B/c you are already on Chantix so you have lost the physical craving and this is just the psychological craving kicking in.

Though I know what a pleasure smoking is and how we need it... at times it's just right. So we have to find sneaky ways to avoid it without completely prohinbiting it which of course makes us crave even more.
OK just writing this makes me want to smoke so I better cut it out now...  ;)

Cindy, I am so relieved and happy to hear from you and with good news. You have disclosed to two guys. Wow... that is just amazing. No matter what happens, this is a great thing.
I am so glad you're back and to know that you are OK.
Yes the Stone thing hurts... his Loss with a capital L. You have been brave and open and self accepting (like with the diclosures and way before that). He has been the opposite, not even calling you up to finish it in a respectable way. That pisses me off. Not that he couldn't mend this if he wanted to, we control our feelings, it's not like there was a huge tragedy FFS. You know what it's the people who try to control everything that lose control the most.

~~~~ small break to lower blood pressure

Sara, I have been kind of cooking the reply to you for a while...  you wrote "Things here with me are going OK. I'm still really bummed about my man -- he's completely emotionally overloaded and doesn't have much room for me right now. We are hanging out tonight so I am hopeful that it will be fun and that I won't be sad and trying to talk about things. It's such a catch-22  --- I want to talk about things but then I get tired of it and just want to enjoy his company too, you know ? And tomorrow night I'm going to a gf's party ... so that will definitely get the spirits up. Friends are great for that".
Yes that sounds more like it, when I get into these situations - b/c I understand from what you write it's you who gets all tangled up - I just step away for sa bit and remind myself that I am in charge of this relationship (wow that sounds really bossy). What I meean is it's what you make it, you don't have to wait for the guy to change things. If you keep it light and happy (reasonably so, not in a fluffy way), it will be... if you do things that make you happy, you will be happy... yes may not sound like a profound philisophy but it works. You just have to think if you love the other person and if you do you accept his flaws, b/c no one's perfect... Gee the more I write the shallower is seems but this is the first time I have tried it and it has worked. What also works is whenever you label you guy (he's a commitment-phobe, he's emotionally shallow, closed off, etc) to just tell yourself in a different way, "he is sometimes unavailable emotionally" (and then you think why? probably there is a reason, like work stress, family), I hope this doesn't sound self delusional, I know people have stable characteristics, but I know that so much is the interaction. I think the first thing is to completely accept who you're with, warts and all, and if you can't... well maybe this is not the right person for you. But if you can (even though there are still things you might change but you are willing to live with them) that's kind of the first step.

Look at me, the relationship guru, pah! There are times when I am embarassed knowing others read this not just us. What the hell, it sounds corny, but it did work for me. I guess the Dr Phils of this world might actually know what they are talking about...

So hope you have (had?) fun at the party.

Me am sitting here wearing not one, but two housecoats (quite the femme fatale) b/c it's so cold and gray, and am about to start a thrilling walk down Excel lane, since I have been so bad at work AND next week have 4 days of doctors appointments for 5 working days. First the eye doctor, then the neurologist, then the gynocologist, then the ID clinic... OK my BF just woke up and came in. We don't sleep together, he sleeps in the bedroom and I in the living room.

Hugs to everyone,

"If you keep one foot in yesterday, and one in tomorrow, you piss all over today". Betty Tacy

Offline BT65

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Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #20 on: October 27, 2007, 07:57:45 AM »
Good morning ladies:

Cin, glad you're back!  I do miss reading about what's really going on with you.  It must be so frustrating knowing someone is "spying" on you.  I hope he bugs off.  It sounds like you're feeling better also.  Good for you for disclosing.  And you have six dates?!  Wow, you go girl!

Drag, I don't blame you for sleeping separate from your bf.  I have slept alone for years and I don't think I could get used to sleeping with someone.  The only other soul I sleep with is my cat.  And she gets mad if I change positions or get up to go to the bathroom. :D  She really does.  She meows really loud, puts her ears back and turns her back on me.  What can I say, she's the queen around here.  Please let us know how all your appointments turn out.  I need to see my eye doctor.  It's been almost two years since I've seen him and my regular doc keeps reminding me I need to do that, being diabetic and all.  I do have diabetic retinopathy in my right eye, and my left eye is developing a cataract. 

I wonder what happened to Cristy and Cammie.  We haven't heard from them in awhile.  I hope everything's o.k. with those girls.

I am anxiously awaiting a full report from Her Majesty on how the date went last night.........
I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

Offline cjc

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Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #21 on: October 27, 2007, 09:10:01 AM »
Hello ladies. Sorry to have been silent for so long but just haven't had much good to report. I have noticed several of you asking about me and knowing ya'll care helps.                                            Sara, thanks so much for starting the new thread. I read your introduction and am glad you are hear. Sorry about your boyfriend's issues, hope ya'll can work it out.    Well, well,   2 ladies here have hot  Latinos to date. Very happy for both Queen and Sunseeker. I hope that both of those situations turn into wonderful things.I love that new relationship feeling.                                                          Dragonette, glad you have one too. Hope your doctor appointments go well next week.                                        Betty, thanks for asking about me.I'll write a little about how things are going in a few.      Don't beat yourself up for smoking a little. as you said, it is definitely the lesser evil in your case. I quit taking my Chantix( after 11 days , it started making me  sick ) but I am still at one pack a day instead of 2. So it had some benefits and I have lots left so may try again.                                                       ML, sorry to hear Stone didn't work out, but you are lovely and  outgoing so you will find someone else. Hope you get to feeling better.                                                                           Things are okay here. I am working more as the holidays approach, things will get really busy where I work. My brother is still here, kinda like a big sponge. I wish he would go home. Robert is great, just testing his boundaries. My other son has court on the 2nd and 29th. We will get a update from the DA next week.                                     I am emailing a nice guy in Arizona but not romantically. We do have a little in common and I like writing him . so that it for a while. i still am here but don't log in much or post. I still love ya'll though. Especially EM , how are you doing lady? Hope you are well.  Later, Cristy  .                                                   

Offline Queen Tokelove

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Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #22 on: October 27, 2007, 06:15:43 PM »
*steps in the room, closes the door and steps up to the mic*....*taps*.....Is this thing on? Well, I know you all have been waiting patiently for me so here it goes. Things did not go as smoothly as I would've liked yesterday in regards to Rico for various reasons. Let me give you a little bit of backstory on Rico.

Rico's Story

Remember now that I told you that a friend set us up. Come to find out Rico use to be married to my friend's sister. Her sister dogged him then divorced him. Somewhere in there a child was born, Rico's only. Friend's family including Rico just moved here from somewhere else. Friend's sister lured him up here but then kicked him to the curb thus he has no family up here so my friend took him in. She says she is pissed with her sister about the way she did him and told her she was setting him up with someone who would appreciate him which is ME.

When Rico got off work he was suppose to call me which he didn't.....Why? Because the ex called him for money for a phone bill and something with the kid. I ended up calling him twice. The first time, leaving a message and the second time actually reaching him but he seemed to be over the ex's and a bit caught off guard with me calling at that time. I let him have it saying that I understood about him seeing his kid, at the time I did not know it was by friend's sister but he could've graced me with a call. That is a real pet peeve of mine. He apologized and said he would call me when he got home. It was more like my friend called for him then put him on the phone. He asked me to come over, actually pleaded so I did. But with a real TUDE!!!!!
I guess everyone saw it when I came in so my friend pulled me off to the side to explain the situation about her sister. Why do I end up with guys with some type of baggage?

Once Rico and I got alone together, he was still apologizing which was getting tired by now. We talked for a few. Cuddled for a few but then I don't know if he was testing me or not, tried me, as in would I give him some booty....Yes, BOOTY!!!!!! Now there are some females that give it up on the first date but the Queen certainly does not....I just sort of laughed it off and told him NO cause I don't know you all like that. I wasn't upset by it because I do little tests too but DAMN. Made plans to get together tomorrow but we'll see if he listened to anything I told him about calling and all that.

I'll you ladies digest that bit for a few. I have the munchies and am going to cook some spaghetti.... ;D
Started Atripla/Ziagen on 9/13/07.
10/31/07 CD4-265 VL- undetectable
2/6/08 CD4- 401 VL- undetectable
5/7/08 CD4- 705 VL- undetectable
6/4/08 CD4- 775 VL- undetectable
8/6/08 CD4- 805 VL- undetectable
11/13/08 CD4- 774 VL--undetectable
2/4/09  CD4- 484  VL- 18,000 (2 months off meds)
3/3/09---Starting Back on Meds---
4/27/09 CD4- 664 VL-- undetectable
6/17/09 CD4- 438 VL- 439
8/09 CD4- 404 VL- 1,600
01-22-10-- CD4- 525 VL- 59,000
Cherish the simple things life has to offer

The Royal Blog

Offline MOONLIGHT1114

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Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #23 on: October 27, 2007, 09:13:00 PM »
Hi GFs~

Queen~  At our age, and as we get older, everyone has baggage.  Its what makes life interesting.  I see some types of baggage as a challenge, other types I won't tolerate at all and immediately write those people off, male or female.  So, you got Rico on the phone and let him have it?  I wonder if you overreacted right away with someone you don't know that well, or were you right on point, and this guy is going to be like a child for you?  Sometimes I just don't get why people don't do the right thing, either, like call when they say they are going to call, but then, things like that help me to form my opinion of them.  Seems like you might have a red flag up early in the game, but keep in mind that Rico has other responsibilities.  Judging from the "relationship" that I just went through, and from many people I've talked with, kids definitely come first.  We just have to be patient.  So, Rico kept apologizing over and over and then you cuddle and then he wants booty?  Oh dear GF, you need to learn him, and quick.  Sounds like he may be on the way to driving you insane.  I know you see right through that shit.  Hang in there.

BT and Drag and Queen and whoever else smokes~  LOL, I can't fully relate girls, but its nice to see how all of you support each other, for those of you who are trying to kick the habit.  My vice is Diet Coke and chocolate, and lately I haven't craved either too much, well maybe the chocolate!

Drag~  You crack me up about your blood pressure rising!  For a moment I couldn't figure out what "FFS" stood for and then I got it.  Thanks for the chuckle, I hope you're doing OK with all of the med switching etc of late.

Cristy~  So glad to see you post!  We were getting concerned!  Sorry your brother is being like a sponge, is he staying for good, and is the world still revolving around him......?

BT~  I hope you rock'n'roll with those new classes!  I love math, I hope you don't get stumped with it!  I haven't agreed to all of those dates, no way, I am still a little sick, but I have talked to some new people on the phone, one of them is very nice.  There's Jay, too, just a moment ago in an IM I brought up the disclosure thing again, since we haven't really had a chance to discuss it since that night.  He is shocked, but he stays in touch, so I'm not sure what's going on.

OK, so I'm all prettied up, my head is stuffy, and I am going to a club alone.  I hate that feeling, when you walk in alone and you feel like everyone is looking at you cause you're alone.  Hell, I looked some dude right in the eye the other day at the store and said HI, so I am trying to get my nerve up more and not be so anxious.  I get that way in public, I really do.  Its Halloween Party night at the club, so I'm sure there will be more to look at than just me with my "X" on my forehead, lol.  I am taking my camera in case there's some really good costumes.  I also want to take pics of the band, but I have to pace myself.  If I get on that dance floor its all over, I'll be gettin' down when I really need to be taking it easy.  We'll see how I do.

More soon!

~ Cindy

HIV+ since '93, 1/12 - CD4 785 and undet.   WOO-HOO!!

Offline confusedme

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Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #24 on: October 27, 2007, 10:17:47 PM »
Hello everyone. I haven't posted in a while. I hope someone remembers me. I have been having general life problems but mainly man problems. Sometimes I just wanna leave...other times I just don't know. Happy is definitely not the word to describe our relationship. I feel like he has totally pulled me down to rock bottom in the last year. I think about leaving, then dating...then I think of all the dating drama I have read here and think of becoming a hermit. I think I would like life better that way. So now I am waiting on one extreme or the other. Make it bad enough to leave or good enough to be happy. This sorta-kinda, see-saw bullshit is really on my nerves. Sorry to bust in with a rant. I just had to get it out.
08/13/07 - Diagnosis confirmed
08/30/07 - T-cells 400, VL 6,500 (Baseline)
11/30/07 - T-cells 428, VL 9,950

Offline BT65

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Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #25 on: October 28, 2007, 09:05:34 AM »
Good morning ladies-

Queen, I'm sorry things didn't go as planned with Rico.  I agree with Cin, everyone at our age has some kind of baggage.  If we want someone without baggage, I guess we better start looking at 18-21 year olds.  Sometimes they come with long stories also.  But, you know your own limits.  I hope things improve.  The fact that he wanted booty so soon makes me wonder if he doesn't have some kind of "sexual baggage" also, like maybe an occasional STD or something.  I hope not, for your sake.  You know how to pace things from here on out, just be true to yourself.

Cristy, I am so glad you checked back in.  Is your brother going to be there for very long?  Can you ask him to plant it somewhere else?  It's your place, you make the rules.  I understand it's hard when it's family, but for heaven's sake, don't let him drive you crazy!  And please let us know how you're doing.

Cin, how was the club?  Friday night at a place called Truman's, which is the largest GLBT club in my area they had a drag show I almost went to.  But, I really couldn't find anyone to go with me, and being in recovery, I don't usually go to those kind of places by myself.  Sometimes I wish I wasn't an addict, but I am so I have to adjust life accordingly. 

Confused, you just rant on girl.  We're here for you.  Don't let this guy get you to the point where you're compromising yourself for the relationship.  If it's that bad, then get the hell out.  He's not worth it, believe me when I say that.

I hope all you other ladies are doing alright.  I'm still wondering where Cammie has been.  Miss hearing from her.  Anyone I left out, hope things are going well.  I'm going to be doing my algebra today, or at least what I can do of it, if anything.  I'm also going to a play today at the local civic theater.  It's going to be "The Glass Menagerie."  I read it years ago in college and love it.  I also have to go shopping today for weekly supplies.  I might see if I can find a couple rugs for my kitchen, as the ones I have now are looking rather gross.

About the smoking, I have been smoking the last couple of days.  But I plan on quitting again tomorrow.  In just four days, I'm short of breath again and having a harder time breathing.  So, it's not worth it.  Definitely not.  Talk to you ladies later-
I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

Offline MOONLIGHT1114

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Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #26 on: October 28, 2007, 12:39:27 PM »
Hi GFs~

Hi Confused~  I was in a relationship years ago, actually it was my first LTR after my husband had passed.  This guy and I dated for about 22 months.  You know how it ended?  One day I asked him point blank how he felt about me, it was the scariest thing!  I mean we got along well, a bunch of us would hang out every weekend, watch football, shoot pool, but this guy never told me he loved me.  Never.  He was hurt from a divorce, here I was widowed only a year when he and I started dating, so I had my own demons, but I had disclosed to him and he accepted me, so I thought all was good.

My point is, I finally had to step up and put things on the table because I was uncomfortable.  I knew that by asking him how he felt about me, that I was giving him an "out."  It scared the hell out of me because I didn't want to be alone.  I had stewed and stirred so long about those three little words not rolling off his tongue that I finally got angry, more angry with myself than anything, because I hadn't brought it up sooner.  Don't get me wrong, he was a good guy, but it seemed that the relationship had reached its limit because of him.

So, I asked him how he felt about me, after a nice evening together and a wonderful dinner, laughter and good conversation.  He hesitated a moment and asked, "Can we just be friends?"  I made him give me a goodbye kiss (a damn good one, lol) and out the door he went.  I was a little upset, but the overwhelming emotion was that I was proud of myself!  "I" was the one who came to terms with where the relationship was, I didn't sit back and wait for something to happen, I got on with my life.   :D  I feared  being alone so much!  My husband had died in August '96, and Brian and I started dating in Sept. '97, up until June '99, when I asked that question of him.

Sometimes you just have to nudge yourself to do what you feel is right, whether its initiating a difficult conversation or walking away from someone, something or a situation that just won't change.  If you're unhappy, you owe it to yourself to make a change for the better.  Unfortunately, we can give advice here, we can cry on shoulders we can wait....but nothing will change until we decide to change it for ourselves.  I don't know the details of you and your guy, I'll have to look at some posts of yours from over the summer, but....don't you think you owe yourself a change?  A chance to breathe again?  I know it may seem scary, but imagine the feeling when you make a change for the better!  Its well worth it!

BT~  I am laughing at you saying we need to look at 18-20 year olds.  THAT is baggage with NO life experience in itself, lol!   Goodness, can you see GQ with a 20yo, she would tear his ass up!   :D  OK, YOU'RE QUITTING TOMORROW, GF.  WELL, MAYBE JUST ONE, BUT I WANT YOU TO TAKE THE STAIRS EVERYWHERE AND PARK IN THE BACK OF THE LOTS, AS A REMINDER!  I know you can do this, I mean you just went over a month with no cigs!  Good luck with that algebra!  PM me if you need help.  I think Yahoo IM has an IMvironment where we can doodle, lol!  I could show you how to do your math there!   :D

Cristy~  Remind me if I'm wrong, but you live with your parents, right?  So now you've got everyone under one roof, including little Robert.  I know it must be tough, but some people would kill to be that close to family because they have none, or the ones they do have are just unloving.  I know its frustrating, I know I would be trying to change my brother for the better and feel like I was talking to a wall if I were you.  Keep pulling those double shifts, keep yourself busy with your son, and just take a wide berth around your brother when you get home if he acts up.  Easier said than done, I'm sure.

The club was a blast!  Just walking up to the place, I had a big smile on my face, looking at everyone who was dressed up.  So many women with their tits out and their skirts short.  C'mon girls, your either born with it or you're not, lol.  No one cheered on the Playboy Bunny during judging later that night.  Me and the girls I was with thought that was funny!  One guy was dressed as a huge penis, I guess he has issues of his own.  The drummer was dressed like Beetlejuice from the movie back in the 90s.  I caught him at the end of the night and took our picture together!  Dale Earnhardt Jr got a lot of applause, goes to show how popular NASCAR is.  No comment on that one.  They don't call my town "Fredneck" for nothing.  "Slash" from GNR won the whole thing but looked like he had been hit by a bus due to a bad wig, lol.  Yes, Queen, Prince was there with an itty bitty white guitar that he had cut out of cardboard.  He was handsome, but about 6' 4", lol!  I talked to him briefly, commented on his stylish coat!  Billy Idol was there in a leather outfit and GRAY hair, lol.  Ugh!  I went to see an 80s band so it was nice to see some people dressing as singers from the 80s.  The Fred Flintstone's were my favorite, and one guy even dressed like "Ralphie" from "A Christmas Story" in a pink bunny suit!  Remember that from the movie?  The girls and I kept playing with his tail!

So, I hooked up with friends after texting one to see if he and his GF would be there, they were.  I took my camera and took crazy pics of all of us dancing and messing with people in their costumes!  It was a good time!  I didn't go onto the dance floor for fear of exhausting myself, and we actually had seats, so we didn't want to lose them.  We went to IHOP afterwards and didn't leave till 3am.  I even got a phone number from a cutie acquaintance.  I asked why he never called months ago, over the summer, when I had given him my number.  He actually called my cell a few minutes after leaving IHOP to say he enjoyed the evening with me.  We had talked a little at the club earlier about his situation, turns out the poor guy is married with kids and the wife doesn't want to separate, so that means you need to be separated for 2 years when one party doesn't agree to it.  Normally in MD its one year.  So, they are all under the same roof and technically, he's married.  His mother lives there, too. Gheez, leave it to me to reel in the puppy dogs having trouble.  So, he hadn't called because of the "separation" situation going down.  Sounds like Jay, but oh so much worse than Jay's situation.  Personally, whether I had kids or not, if a man wanted a separation, it would break my heart, but you know me, I don't want to keep anyone around who isn't 100%.  I would think a separation is a time for reflection and sorting out thoughts and feelings, a time for change, which us Scorpios do oh so well.  Sounds like this guy's wife is a leg-humper, its sad.  But hey, she's his wife, I gotta give her credit for that, but gheez, let the man go and live your life, I say.  Sound familiar, confusedme?........

Goodness, its 12:35pm, I gotta get breakfast, lmao!   :P

~ Cindy
« Last Edit: October 28, 2007, 12:50:20 PM by MOONLIGHT1114 »
HIV+ since '93, 1/12 - CD4 785 and undet.   WOO-HOO!!

Offline confusedme

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Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #27 on: October 28, 2007, 01:12:30 PM »
Betty and Cindy...I know you guys are right. I don't know why I can't just put my foot down and let it go. We've been together for almost nine years, and married over 5 years. Some days are really great but some days are bad to the point of ridiculous. We either really get along or we really don't. Part of me thinks that he resents me about the miscarriage. Things have been so much worse since then. I love him so much it makes me mad at myself. I have never let a relationship have this much hold over me. I don't know why this one is so different.
08/13/07 - Diagnosis confirmed
08/30/07 - T-cells 400, VL 6,500 (Baseline)
11/30/07 - T-cells 428, VL 9,950

Offline Queen Tokelove

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Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #28 on: October 28, 2007, 02:11:56 PM »
Ugh....I feel so hung over and I didn't have a thing to drink. It's because I had gotten very little sleep on Friday and last night me and my roomie partied here at the crib with our mutual friend who hooked me up with Rico. So, if I don't address a few things it's because I'm still a bit out of it and not thinking straight...But I had fun which is something I don't say too often so I guess the hang over is kinda worth it.... ;)

About Rico....My girl laid into him about his actions about trying me on the booty thing. It's been a few years since he has had any too so I can relate but funny to me how men handle it so much differently. My girl and her brother has known him for over 10 yrs and speak very highly of him. So, Rico is kinda like a work in progress type of thing so I'm gonna stick it out and work with him. He really is a nice guy, he just has been taken advantage of a lot, mainly by my girl's sister. I have been filled in on a lot so things make a bit more sense to me now. I have no problem with him taking care of his kid but the ex uses the kid to get money out of him even though he takes care of his kid. I don't like females like that. What I laid into him for was about calling me, not doing for his kid, just wanted to make that point clear.

*short pause for the cause, in other words, I'm twisting one up*... :D One puff, two puffs....exhale.....Ahhhh.


Cindy--- Girl, my last relationship was with someone younger than me. All I can say is never again. Felt like my crib turned into Pee Wee's Playhouse, ok... :D I wish I could've seen the guy dressed like Prince. He would have to have all Prince's mannerisms to get approval from me.. ;) You are right about the baggage thing, we all have ours and I am taking Rico's as a challenge and some things he will have to be schooled on. I mean he is a man after all.... ;D

Confused--- I remember you posting a while back but you may have to refresh my memory a bit on your story. I am sorry to hear you had a miscarriage but for him to blame on you does not sit well with me but if you guys have not talked since about that time then I would say it is long overdue. Maybe you both need a good cry together. Try to stay strong and you come vent here as much as you like. We are here for you like anyone else who is going through it. So you start posting more often, ok?

Betty---- Forgot to mention before but glad to see you in the avatar. You know my radar has been off lately. Girl, if I had been there, we could've went to that drag show, I love stuff like that. Drag Queens have their shit together....clothes, make-up, all that and a sista like me could've used some pointers... ;) And I would've been taking all kinds of pictures. And you wouldn't have to worry about anything cause I would've had your back when it comes to you and your recovery. My Dad was a recovering alcoholic, so I know all about people, places, and things...I know you are stressing about school so that is prolly why you smoking again but just try to smoke only a certain amount a day, like 2..Don't go back to packs and when you are ready to quit and get back on the Chantix then do it. I really wish I could quit and I want to.

OMG, I don't want to get out the bed today. I woke up at 9 am and took Boo out to do his business. No, not that Boo but my old neighbor in the building I just moved out of. His dog is named Boo. I dog sit for him from time to time because Boo don't like a lot of people. My neighbor was amazed that he took to me. I'm not really a dog person but I have a few I take to. Gotta meet Cheech one day cause I think he is cute and I like his name, of course. I owe him a belly rub.... ;) In other animal news, remember all together there is 4 cats here and only one is a girl, her name is Polly(roomie's cat), I call her Princess Polly because she acts so regal. We may be calling her Mommy but not sure yet. And guess who the Daddy is? Yep, my Lucifer, he follows her all day trying to jump her and we think he might have gotten her. Because of how unique they both are, Lucifer has 6 toes and Polly has 7, plus their coloring and all, we think the kittens are going to be gorgeous, not sure about how many toes.... ;) 

I gotta run, Boo is giving me his potty look...... ;D
Started Atripla/Ziagen on 9/13/07.
10/31/07 CD4-265 VL- undetectable
2/6/08 CD4- 401 VL- undetectable
5/7/08 CD4- 705 VL- undetectable
6/4/08 CD4- 775 VL- undetectable
8/6/08 CD4- 805 VL- undetectable
11/13/08 CD4- 774 VL--undetectable
2/4/09  CD4- 484  VL- 18,000 (2 months off meds)
3/3/09---Starting Back on Meds---
4/27/09 CD4- 664 VL-- undetectable
6/17/09 CD4- 438 VL- 439
8/09 CD4- 404 VL- 1,600
01-22-10-- CD4- 525 VL- 59,000
Cherish the simple things life has to offer

The Royal Blog

Offline confusedme

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Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #29 on: October 28, 2007, 02:30:14 PM »
Thanks Queen. I am really trying to come around here more often. I have gotten so antisocial over the last couple years that I have a hard time finding a way to fit in with people. I know he shouldn't blame me for the miscarriage. It hit me really hard, a lot harder than I expected. He hasn't said that he blames me. It just seems like things have been more strained since then. My best friend says I expected too much of a fairy tale from this relationship. He was in prison for several years. Before he went, we were in a really good place relationship wise. Things were good but I feel like I am less a part of his life now than I ever was. Maybe the years apart took more of a toll on us than I ever imagined. He hasn't been out six months. I thought things would at least be great at first.

LOL @ Boo the dog. You must have known I would immediately think about the other Boo. As for Lucifer...what are ya'll gonna do if you wind up with a house full of baby kitties?
08/13/07 - Diagnosis confirmed
08/30/07 - T-cells 400, VL 6,500 (Baseline)
11/30/07 - T-cells 428, VL 9,950

Offline Queen Tokelove

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Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #30 on: October 28, 2007, 02:58:11 PM »
Confused--

Um, only been out 6 months? You would think he would've been trying to break your back.. ;) Sorry, couldn't think of a better way to say it.. I am known for being honestly blunt, have I warned you of that? If not, that was your warning... ;D I kinda agree with your friend, it is hard to have a kinda fairy tale relationship going on when someone is locked up. How was things before? You say good but is this while he was away or before? And how is he making you less a part of his life? I mean if he is treating you more like a room mate then I would it is time to talk to him and find out what's going on.

If Princess Polly is knocked up considering how me and my roomie are about our cats, we would more than likely keep them. If we were to give some away it would be to people who would have to take care of them.
Started Atripla/Ziagen on 9/13/07.
10/31/07 CD4-265 VL- undetectable
2/6/08 CD4- 401 VL- undetectable
5/7/08 CD4- 705 VL- undetectable
6/4/08 CD4- 775 VL- undetectable
8/6/08 CD4- 805 VL- undetectable
11/13/08 CD4- 774 VL--undetectable
2/4/09  CD4- 484  VL- 18,000 (2 months off meds)
3/3/09---Starting Back on Meds---
4/27/09 CD4- 664 VL-- undetectable
6/17/09 CD4- 438 VL- 439
8/09 CD4- 404 VL- 1,600
01-22-10-- CD4- 525 VL- 59,000
Cherish the simple things life has to offer

The Royal Blog

Offline confusedme

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Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #31 on: October 28, 2007, 03:35:26 PM »
LOL @ breaking my back. I like blunt people. I am like that most times. better than BS-ing around any day. When I say things were good before I meant before he was sentenced. We really were getting along great. We didn't have a lot but we were dealing with it gracefully which was hard for him since he was letting go of the dealer lifestyle. I feel like I am less a part of his life now because it is like he never shares anything with me. We rarely talk and when we do it has a tendency to lead to an argument. Roommate really does describe how I feel sometimes...like we just share a bed out of convenience.
08/13/07 - Diagnosis confirmed
08/30/07 - T-cells 400, VL 6,500 (Baseline)
11/30/07 - T-cells 428, VL 9,950

Offline MOONLIGHT1114

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Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #32 on: October 28, 2007, 03:47:57 PM »
Queen!

I got my first hit on www.freecycle.org and I'm out the door to go pick up a bagless vacuum downtown, only 3 miles away!  LOL  My Kirby is an ancient relic and is so damn heavy to do the stairs with, lol!

Its good to see more posting here, I will be back later.  Forgive me, confusedme, I didn't know you were married to this guy, sorry I missed that.  Perhaps its time for couples' counseling, you both have been through a lot, but you can't blame YOU for everything.

Hang in there!  Cheech and I are off to get our vacuum!

HAIL TO THE REDSKINS!   This is gonna be a tough game tonight!

~ Cindy
HIV+ since '93, 1/12 - CD4 785 and undet.   WOO-HOO!!

Offline Queen Tokelove

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Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #33 on: October 28, 2007, 04:00:47 PM »
Confused----

I know about dating drug dealers and they get use to the fast money. Now he is out from a charge and he has nothing, it is prolly doing a number on him. And if you are feeling out of his life, it may be because he may be getting involved in that again. I hope I am wrong, of course but you never know. I wish there was some way you could find out or just ask him point blank cause people tend to get pissed when you try to find things out behind their backs. But something has to give because I can imagine the amount of stress it is causing you. Not trying to force the issue but just saying......

Cindy---- Good for you on the vacuum. I'm loving freecycle, I have been keeping my eye open on things with them. Ugh, the Redskins!!!! I need to check out the scores for today, not sure if my Cowboys played today or if they have a bye....

I really need to go. I took Boo out but needs to get in the tub. Rico is coming over later...I feel so hung over that I am not motivated to move but I gotta get my ass in gear so I can be so fresh and so clean... ;D
Started Atripla/Ziagen on 9/13/07.
10/31/07 CD4-265 VL- undetectable
2/6/08 CD4- 401 VL- undetectable
5/7/08 CD4- 705 VL- undetectable
6/4/08 CD4- 775 VL- undetectable
8/6/08 CD4- 805 VL- undetectable
11/13/08 CD4- 774 VL--undetectable
2/4/09  CD4- 484  VL- 18,000 (2 months off meds)
3/3/09---Starting Back on Meds---
4/27/09 CD4- 664 VL-- undetectable
6/17/09 CD4- 438 VL- 439
8/09 CD4- 404 VL- 1,600
01-22-10-- CD4- 525 VL- 59,000
Cherish the simple things life has to offer

The Royal Blog

Offline confusedme

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Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #34 on: October 28, 2007, 04:19:24 PM »
Yay another Cowboys fan! Gotta love 'em.

I've been kinda wondering about that too. I learn more towards not though just because he stays so broke. Something is keeping him defensive though.

I looked at the freecycle thing briefly. The closest one to me is like 30 miles away though.

I've been trying to go through some of the other parts of this forum. Maybe I am just too big of a newbie but some of the other posts freak me out. Reading about problems with IO's and drug combos are scary to me since I am not there yet.
08/13/07 - Diagnosis confirmed
08/30/07 - T-cells 400, VL 6,500 (Baseline)
11/30/07 - T-cells 428, VL 9,950

Offline Nygurl225

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Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #35 on: October 28, 2007, 09:26:29 PM »
Hello ladies!! Well, at this point I'm way too exausted emotionally and physically to get into my dating dramas and dilemas, but I will say that I want to thank all of you. As I sit here and read through these posts I realize that not only are there REAL women out there who are facing or have faced the same relationship problems I have. There is hope for future relationships. I was begining to feel a bit sorry for myself (as much as I hate to admit it) Thinking that with my new Pos status dating was pretty much over. And sex life....hahahaha, that was something that I never thought I'd have again.


I do ask some advice from you all. How exactly do you go about disclosing to potential dates?

Offline MOONLIGHT1114

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Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #36 on: October 29, 2007, 12:04:44 AM »
OK, its 11:56pm Eastern and my cable went out a half hour ago during the World Series!!!!!  During the middle of the 8th.  Sure as hell glad I don't work at Comcast!  I am pissed!!!

Just heard the Sox swept it, woo-hoo!

NY~  I too started here in the Forums as I was getting closer to disclosing to someone I had grown close to.  That was last June.  I had disclosed to men before, years ago before my LTR, and it can be nerve-racking.  I am doing much better these days.  You have to work up the nerve, you have to be strong, be confident in yourself, and....be ready for bewilderment (on their part) and possible rejection.  You also have to have faith that not everyone will turn tail and run.  I just disclosed last week to someone and he was shocked.  He is still emailing, texting, flirting....not what I expected at all, so I am happy.

I think something that I did in the past which may have made it difficult for the guys I disclosed to was this....I got way over-emotional.  I had been holding so much in with no one to talk to, that when I disclosed, the disclosure and months of not "having an ear" just flowed.  That may have scared some guys off.  I have disclosed to three people this month, and I intend to keep going.  Read back over our dating threads if you haven't already, they are helpful in letting you know you're not alone.  But, everyone will tell you the same thing, you disclose when YOU feel its time.  There's no "How to" book on disclosure, you just consider all of the facts and decide whether or not to do it, and when. 

Is he worth my time?  Are there red flags?  Can I wait a little longer because we are still getting to know one another?  Can I live with myself if I kiss him and don't tell (in my opinion, YES!  :D  ) Is he married?   :o  Do we have the same morals and values?  Is he compassionate?  Does he trust me?  Do I trust him?  Is there mutual respect?

So many questions, so many things to consider, and we are all different with what we consider to be of importance to us.  Just remember, no need to rush, just be responsible.

Hope this helped a little, be right back with links to the thread histories....

For new readers, here's our "Dating Threads" history....
Part I:       http://forums.poz.com/index.php?topic=12526.0
Part II:      http://forums.poz.com/index.php?topic=13850.0
Part III:     http://forums.poz.com/index.php?topic=14375.0
Part IV:     http://forums.poz.com/index.php?topic=14848.0
Part V:      http://forums.poz.com/index.php?topic=15148.0
Part VI:     http://forums.poz.com/index.php?topic=15558.0
Part VII:    http://forums.poz.com/index.php?topic=15951.0
Part VIII:   http://forums.poz.com/index.php?topic=16271.0

~ Cindy
« Last Edit: October 29, 2007, 12:25:09 AM by MOONLIGHT1114 »
HIV+ since '93, 1/12 - CD4 785 and undet.   WOO-HOO!!

Offline Queen Tokelove

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Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #37 on: October 29, 2007, 01:13:48 AM »
After finally getting my ass in gear for getting with Rico, the date came to a screeching halt... ::) I wasn't mad, I took it in stride. It was a call that came to his phone, his kid needed diapers or so I thought. It was diapers for someone else's kid and they asked him. So, the date only lasted like an hour. He said he would call me when he was done, I guess you know, I never got the call....I guess I will just wait to see how long it takes for me to get a call. Let's see if he can pick up the phone to make the next date....

NY-- For me, I get to know a person first before I disclose. I have been rejected by most and accepted by a few. But it doesn't mean it will be that way for you.

Confused-- He could be making it appear he is broke to you, I'm just saying but you know your man better than I do. Yep, I have been a Cowboys fan for awhile now. Did they play on Sunday? I guess I will have to check out the scores online. You mean the closest person on freecycle is 30 miles away? Don't give up, you might find someone closer and sometimes they will bring whatever they are giving away to you. As far as the other parts of the forum, well stick with what you can handle for now, the rest will come. And you can't expect to absorb all the knowledge on here. When you are ready or want to know something, you will branch out or for now just ask here if you are more comfortable here. We are pretty smart and what we don't know we can find out for you.

I am full as a tick about now and really needs to catch up on some sleep. I gotta get my blood drawn tomorrow so I need to be rested while I get pricked like a voodoo doll..... ;D
Started Atripla/Ziagen on 9/13/07.
10/31/07 CD4-265 VL- undetectable
2/6/08 CD4- 401 VL- undetectable
5/7/08 CD4- 705 VL- undetectable
6/4/08 CD4- 775 VL- undetectable
8/6/08 CD4- 805 VL- undetectable
11/13/08 CD4- 774 VL--undetectable
2/4/09  CD4- 484  VL- 18,000 (2 months off meds)
3/3/09---Starting Back on Meds---
4/27/09 CD4- 664 VL-- undetectable
6/17/09 CD4- 438 VL- 439
8/09 CD4- 404 VL- 1,600
01-22-10-- CD4- 525 VL- 59,000
Cherish the simple things life has to offer

The Royal Blog

Offline BT65

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Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #38 on: October 29, 2007, 06:12:41 AM »
Wow, all the chit-chat I miss when I'm away for just one day.  Anyway, good morning ladies-

Yesterday, my therapist took me to see a play his wife was in (The Glass Menagerie).  Before any of you say "WTF, her THERAPIST," I've been seeing the same one since 1991.  He and his wife have been through all my shit with me over the years, and they're my granddaughter's godparents.  So, sometimes we do stuff outside of counseling.  It was an excellent play, very well-acted.  He thought I might not like it because of it being such a "drama" but I love stuff like that.  I liked literature when I took it in college years ago.  And "The Glass Menagerie" is, to me, a very good autobiograph by its author (Tennessee Williams). 

When I got home, which wasn't until like 4:30, I ate dinner, and did my math homework.  I got like all but three questions done.  I was surprised!  I thought I'd be stuck right off the bat.  I had to review the pages previous to the questions, to try to figure out how to do the problems, but I did it!  About the three questions, I might ask the teacher to meet me a 1/2 hour before class so she can explain them in a way that makes sense to me.  Cin, I might IM you also.  I don't have yahoo instant messenger.  I've been asked by a lot of people if I have it; I don't even know what it is.  But, I think I'll probably e-mail the teacher.  Usually I do better if someone is explaining it to me face-to-face. 

So, after I was done with my homework, I went to Kohle's.  However, I couldn't get what I wanted because when I was walking up to go to the register, my blood sugar crashed, I mean really crashed.  So I had to put the stuff down and leave the store and go to the nearest drive-through and get something with sugar in it.  I might go back today, not really sure.  They had some smokin' hot deals there.  I just hate when that happens.  Which is not very frequently, thank goodness.

Queen, I'm sorry Rico had to cut out so fast.  Did he ever call you? 

Confused, a drug dealer, eh?  My former brother-in-law went to federal prison for that.  He got busted for dealing over 1,000 lbs of marijuana, which is a federal crime because of the amount.  He had to do a straight six years and paid a lawyer $60,000 cash to get that.  Please watch it, because, as Her Majesty said, they get used to that fast cash and they miss the lifestyle that comes with that.  I couldn't be with someone who was doing that in the first place, but that's me.  It's nothing I would want to raise a child around, I know that.  Just sayin'

Cin, it sounds like you really had a great time at the club.  I just love seeing people in costume, especially when the costumes are unique.  People all over my neighborhood have their yards decorated for Halloween.  I'm not into doing decorations too much anymore, not really sure why.  I think it's because I hate dragging them out and then having to put them all away when the holiday's over. 

I hope all you ladies have a wonderful day.  I've got about six cigarettes left in my pack I bought two days ago.  I should crush them and throw them out, but then that would be a waste wouldn't it :o (hey, I'm an addict, what can I say). :D
I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

Offline cjc

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Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #39 on: October 29, 2007, 07:58:27 AM »
Hello ladies. Hope everyone is well this morning.  Not too long from getting Robert on the bus. i might go back to bed but will probably go to the library and grocery store instead.   We do live with my parents and everyone seems to be happy like this. I do ask sometimes and I try to help with housework and food , stuff like that.  My brother will leave soon cause there's not enough work for him, I am just trying to hold my tongue til then.                            Other than that I am okay. Robert is learning new things at school and being his sweet self. Work is okay and my friend who I disclosed to is wanting to go out soon. Which is a worry in itself.                                                       Sounds like you ladies are busy. Queen, diapers for someone else's baby?  Time to move on, IMHO. He's not worthy.                         Betty, the play sounded like fun. It's nice that you have such a good relationship with your therapist.    Keep trying with the cigs.    Moonlight, sounds like you had fun at the club.                                            Anyway, gotta go, waiting in the Water stove man to call.  Much better that the inside woodstove that we have.   Later.  Cristy

Offline Nygurl225

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Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #40 on: October 29, 2007, 09:02:14 AM »
Thanks for the links Cin!

I know when it comes time to disclose it's going to be really hard for me. I mean I've been through so much with men to begin with and now this is just added BS! I guess whats meant to be will be. At this point in my life I'm so sickened by all the BS I've put up with concerning men that I have lost all desire to date.

A little history on me to help you all understand the insanity of my life. I moved five six years ago. 6 hours away from my family, friends and home to be with a man whom I had just had a child with. He had family in the area and we figured it would be a fresh start for us. Well he became very abusive as soon as we moved and I was stuck having no family or friends in the area to turn to. Years pased and I had another child with him. The abuse went on. Finally I got to the point where I simply couldn't take anymore. I had, had at least 2 nervous breakdowns, was on medication for "situational anxiety" The situation being him and my doctors would tell me that they didn't feel safe sending me home with him. Things were bad. By this time I had made a friend or two but one friend in particular who has been a pure angel. She has helped me in any way possible and assisted me in leaving my ex. I moved out with nothing but the clothes on my back and my kids (3, two with him and one from a previous relationship). My goal was to eventualy move back home to be with my family and friends and "start again". Well as soon as I began dating my jealous crazy ex filed for custody of my children. He had the judge order that I could not move out of the county with my children because their father lived here and I couldn't make it hard for him to visit them. Hence, I'm stuck here. No family, few friends no support system. My ex continues to file for custody everytime he gets upset with me (part of his control issues). I've been in a custody battle for the past three years and my children have been shuffled between the two of us. Its horrible.

On to the newest situation. I rekindled a romance with a man I had been friends with since I was ten and had dated in my teens. He was in the military but the long distance worked well. I was going through my own issues and not having him around all the time gave me space to do what I needed to for myself and family. He ended up being deployed to Iraq. While he was there I was faithful, did everything I could for him. Sent him things all the time and was just there for him. He came home on leave and we speant that time together. It was during that time which I became pregnant. After he left back to Iraq I found out that while he wasn't with me he was sleeping with another girl (he juggled the two of us while he was home). Went as far as to take her to meet his grandmother and his parents.

Fast foward to the present. He has returned home and I'm currently 8 months pregnant. We still speak but we are not together. He has promised to help me and all that good stuff but he has done nothing but party and hang out since returning. He was supposed to come stay with me for a little bit so he could attend doctors apts, sonograms and his childs birth (even though we're not together we've been friends for 15 years so I haven't forgiven but I've moved past the BS) well he's made it clear that, thats something he wont be doing. He makes all kinds of excuses for why he hasn't done anything to help me out in getting ready for this baby but the reality is, to him, his life is simply more important. So now I am comming to terms with being alone all over again and struggling to pay the bills and make sure my new addition is taken care of.

Such is the story of my life!!

Offline Dragonette

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Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #41 on: October 29, 2007, 02:39:57 PM »
hello ladies,
Wow, had a lot has happened here since I wrote. I have been reading all the stories and thinking how much people have to go through until they find that safe place which we're all looking for. I've experienced some of these things, but not on this level and thankfully with no children involved. This wasn't because I'm so smart , I guess I was just lucky .I wrote about this before briefly and I want to go into this right now , I just say that I'm often still haunted by these memories. What I wish for all of us is that this is all that that they will be - just memories, ancient history .

Queen , I'm a little disappointed that things didn't turn out the way they should have, but then again they rarely do do they...  I think you'll just have to hang in there and see what this is really all about and whether you like it are not. until the point in which you wrote that he went off to get some diapers for someone who is not even his baby's mother, I was pretty cool about it all since as Cindy said, everyone comes with baggage of some sort or another. But the ending is just too wierd and makes me wonder if this is the complete story or not. Well I guess we'll find out soon. I hope things improve. It's early to tell.

Cindy, how awsome that you had such a great time at the party! I read your post in which you said that you didn't feel like going alone and I wanted to write use some words of encouragement , since I had to go to so many places alone , including new year's eve [actually it was an all night thing] in Tokyo. Talk about lonely!  And cold ...even in my own country I had to go sometimes to places alone , like movies or a bar, and I have certainly spent my fair share of weekends alone, going to the park with all the families etc. I hated it but I still thought it better than hiding out in my house. Oh not to mention the countless times I went to the beach alone. So I wanted to write to that in most cases the people that look at you only do it because they like what they see, and actually they almost always assume that you have someone waiting for you inside or that you separated from a friend who met somebody else but anyway all this is irrelevant because you from people to go with , and had a great time, which is just also awsome. I like what you wrote about the excuse to show some T&A, so true.

I have so many new appointments this week at the hospital that I'm going to miss so much work .I've tried overstaying today to compensate for that a little bit, but you can see what happens... inevitably I drift into the forums, which is OK , I mean they have kept me sane several times, not to mention alive, as in the last medical fiasco.

Betty, I hope you don't feel too guilty about the relapse into smoking , 'cause that happens to the best of them. maybe if you tell yourself that you can smoke but simply prefer not to, as in a choice you make every single hour every single day, it would be easier than making the decision for life .I'm not saying that smoking is healthy, but then again it's not the type of addiction in which you need to be so harsh with yourself. yes I know it's harmful but you need to keep your sanity too. I don't think you should give up on the idea of giving up , maybe what you should do is try to rate before you have a smoke how much you really want it and need it, like on a scale of one to ten, and as dumb as it sounds write the reason that you need to smoke, like pissed off because of this and that, or upset because, tired, etc. you can still smoke that you have to justify to yourself why. I've seen this work with compulsive eating , so why not with smoking , especially since you've gotten rid of the physical addiction.

I gotta go because I've been talking to the computer for more than half an hour. Hugs to all of you and thinking of you
"If you keep one foot in yesterday, and one in tomorrow, you piss all over today". Betty Tacy

Offline MOONLIGHT1114

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Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #42 on: October 29, 2007, 04:13:39 PM »
Cindy, how awsome that you had such a great time at the party! ...... I like what you wrote about the excuse to show some T&A, so true.

"The club was a blast!  Just walking up to the place, I had a big smile on my face, looking at everyone who was dressed up.  So many women with their tits out and their skirts short.  C'mon girls, your either born with it or you're not, lol. "

Drag!  MY girls were COVERED!  LOL  :D

HIV+ since '93, 1/12 - CD4 785 and undet.   WOO-HOO!!

Offline Queen Tokelove

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Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #43 on: October 29, 2007, 04:29:10 PM »
Not much jumping off today since it is Monday and a wrestling night.. ;) I got my blood work done then went to see my gf where Rico lives. I had made her a cd so I had to stop by. I visited for a while and was speaking to Rico, like I said, I will wait to see if he calls and makes another date. He wanted me to stay longer but I just said I had something to do which required my attention. He seemed disappointed but hey, he basically pulled the same thing so.......

I will add more later and respond to posts....But did read them and has a bit to say...Be back later...
Started Atripla/Ziagen on 9/13/07.
10/31/07 CD4-265 VL- undetectable
2/6/08 CD4- 401 VL- undetectable
5/7/08 CD4- 705 VL- undetectable
6/4/08 CD4- 775 VL- undetectable
8/6/08 CD4- 805 VL- undetectable
11/13/08 CD4- 774 VL--undetectable
2/4/09  CD4- 484  VL- 18,000 (2 months off meds)
3/3/09---Starting Back on Meds---
4/27/09 CD4- 664 VL-- undetectable
6/17/09 CD4- 438 VL- 439
8/09 CD4- 404 VL- 1,600
01-22-10-- CD4- 525 VL- 59,000
Cherish the simple things life has to offer

The Royal Blog

Offline BT65

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Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #44 on: October 29, 2007, 08:27:22 PM »
Wow, nygurl.  There is a lot I would like to say, but I'll digest your post, try to relate to where you're at, and come back later.  Just hang in there.  Are you getting good medical care?  When did you find out about being HIV+?   I was just wondering if there was any birth control being practiced to avoid the possibility of having and HIV+ child and the birth control failed, or you don't practice birth control?  Anyway, whatever the situation, you're here with us now.  I am curious though as to what brought you to these forums and when did you find out about being poz?

Drag, being a telemarketer, I work on a computer also.  But I was informed in training that if we're ever caught on the regular "web" we'd be instantly terminated.  Sometimes it's really slow and I would like something to do.  But I keep telling myself that this job is temporary, I'm going to school for the future etc.  I hope the job doesn't interfere with the schoolwork.  The classes are getting into the thick of things now, and I can't let them suffer.

Queen, I don't blame you for not staying over there just because he wanted you to.  What do you owe him?

As for my smoking, I broke up and threw out a pack of cigarettes this morning, then after work stopped at a 7-11 and bought some more.  I'll learn eventually I guess to either finish the pack or stop wasting money. ::)

Cristy, btw, glad you're checking in more again.  I hope the situation with your brother being there doesn't wear you down too much.  Don't forget, we're here for you.  Hang in there.

I hope all you other ladies have a good one!
I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

Offline confusedme

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Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #45 on: October 29, 2007, 08:54:03 PM »
Hi ladies, just stopping in for a minute. I've got a killer headache so I think I'll crash early tonight.

Queen and Betty...I hear ya'll loud and clear. I'm sitting back trying to read what is going on with him.

Cowboy's are on a break this week. We'll have to wait til next week to watch them play.

Rico will so be missin out if he doesn't call you. I hope he does soon.

Off to bed I go...I need darkness and quiet. 'Night all.
08/13/07 - Diagnosis confirmed
08/30/07 - T-cells 400, VL 6,500 (Baseline)
11/30/07 - T-cells 428, VL 9,950

Offline Queen Tokelove

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Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #46 on: October 30, 2007, 12:34:54 AM »
Ny--- Reading your post really brought back memories, I had a man do a 360 on me like that when I moved away with him. He became abusive and started stalking me. He became even more enraged when his cousin took me in and let me stay with him til I was able to save enough money to go back home. I am also sorry to hear that the legal system seems to be working against you. Is there anywhere you can get free legal services? Don't give up hope. God/ddess doesn't like ugly and karma has a way of biting one in the ass when they least expect it.

As for the guy in the military, this is the child you are carrying now, correct? If so, then it sounds like to me he is just going to keep feeding you bullshit. You didn't make that baby by yourself, I would sue him for support. If he denies paternity then take the paternity test. He needs to take care of his responsibilities first, then the rest of his life is his own business. The military will take a portion out of his check and if you are not on any public assistance then you will get that check, if you are on assistance, they will take a portion of it. Basically if the check from the military is more than you get from public assistance and I am speaking on the cash side of it then stop the cash from them. You will have to do some investigating on this for your area but it is pretty much how it works in Pa, just giving you something to go on. I know he has promised to do things for you but if he don't even want to be there for the birth of your child......That speaks volumes to me, girlfriend. The sex may be the bomb but you deserve better or if you choose to continue with it then at least have it on your terms. But honestly if he was juggling you before with someone else, it is possible he will do it again. And why deal with the games?

Christy--- Good to hear from you again. I usually would have been cut dudes off but since I know a bit of what is going on in Rico's life at the moment, I am trying to cut him a break and be a little understanding. Just know that the Queen does have an Ace up her sleeve... ;) I am just sitting back and building a strategy against his ex because she is the main one who is playing games. Now usually the average female around here would be ready to throw blows but I am much more refined. And who wants to get all dirty and sweaty.... ;D I am just letting her think she has the upper hand for now but when I drop the bomb, let's just say it will be a wrap. Oh, how I love it when a plan comes together... ;)

Confused--- I am glad you are listening. Trust me, you can only keep things like that in the dark for so long. But if or when it does come to light, just sit back and listen to the excuses that come with it. I am sure you will make up your own mind after that. Hmm, I wonder who our team plays next week. They deserve a rest.

Cindy--- Did you get the vacuum? How is it working for you? I hope you are feeling better, it seems like you are. But you know how to reach me so I don't get too concerned when you get quiet here and I know how to nag you.... ;)

I guess that's it for now.
Started Atripla/Ziagen on 9/13/07.
10/31/07 CD4-265 VL- undetectable
2/6/08 CD4- 401 VL- undetectable
5/7/08 CD4- 705 VL- undetectable
6/4/08 CD4- 775 VL- undetectable
8/6/08 CD4- 805 VL- undetectable
11/13/08 CD4- 774 VL--undetectable
2/4/09  CD4- 484  VL- 18,000 (2 months off meds)
3/3/09---Starting Back on Meds---
4/27/09 CD4- 664 VL-- undetectable
6/17/09 CD4- 438 VL- 439
8/09 CD4- 404 VL- 1,600
01-22-10-- CD4- 525 VL- 59,000
Cherish the simple things life has to offer

The Royal Blog

Offline BT65

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Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #47 on: October 30, 2007, 05:49:11 AM »
Hey nygurl, I just reread my previous post.  I hope you don't think I'm judgemental.  Far from it.  I would like to know, though, the circumstances surrounding your being diagnosed HIV+.  Believe me, we all have a story to tell.  I do agree with Her Majesty, that if he juggled you and the other girl, chances are he wouldn't stop that behavior.  He does need to take care of his responsibilities though, so I hope things work to your advantage as far as that's concerned.

Just wanted to post a quick note.  I hope all you ladies have a wonderful day.
I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

Offline Nygurl225

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Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #48 on: October 30, 2007, 08:34:52 AM »
Ok I see there are a few questions that I have left all of you with and I'm sorry to not have been clear.

Iíll start with Betty~~ I do not think your judgemental in the least!! I feel as you do we all have a story  and weíre all here to support each other. To answer your questions, This pregnancy is how I found out I was Poz.  I tested neg 3 years ago after having my son. When I became pregnant again I took the normal stream of tests including the HIV test and low and behold it came back Poz. Thankfully I found out early in the pregnancy  and was referred to a specialist right away. I am now on Trizivir and from what my doctor says my risk of having a HIV+ baby is less then 1%.

Queen~~ Thank you for your words of support.  Our legal system is only as good as the people whom practice it. I did have some bad breaks but I think that was due to an attorney who was more about money then about the welfare of my children. I have since switched legal representation and things are going much better. This woman was a single mother who put herself through school and has also dealt with messed up men. It helps to have someone who actually cares and knows where your coming from. She has been amazing and really made some progress as far as my case is concerned. The court system is finally seeing my ex for who he is. I canít speak much about it because we are still in the middle of the trial but I will def give details when itís over. It is a story that couldíve been a soap opera!

As far as the military man. This is his child and right now Iím just going through the process of mentally preparing to take this on alone. I have no fear really, I believe the big man upstairs will not give me more then I can handle. Life is a learning experience or more like a poker game. Sometimes your given shitty cards and you can either fold or bluff the hell outta the other players and still be a winner!! I have looked into support issues, and at least as of now he does not deny his child. We will see what happens only time will tell.

My new quest for this week is to find out what benefits I am entitled to as Iím newly out of work. Here goes another journey!

Well ladies I hope you all have a great day. Iím off to do some school work and then off to school.
« Last Edit: October 30, 2007, 04:36:46 PM by Nygurl225 »

Offline Queen Tokelove

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Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #49 on: October 30, 2007, 02:25:52 PM »
Ny--

It is good that you have someone who has been where you are and has overcome the same things you are experiencing now. It's good to have that support and now I don't have to worry as much.. ;) It also appears that you have your game face on, thinking of the poker comment, and you are on track and getting things done.

What a way to find out that you were poz but at least it caught early enough and your baby will be fine. At least Mr. Military is claiming the child but he still needs to man up to his responsibilities. Don't let him to back peddle in any way. The legal system is not perfect by a long shot when it comes to custody issues but I am glad things are starting to work in your favor. I also know how stressful the process can be too, just remember to take care of yourself because stress can affect your numbers too. Just remember you are not alone and a few of us has been where you are. I hope talking to us about it has helped. Keep us posted..
Started Atripla/Ziagen on 9/13/07.
10/31/07 CD4-265 VL- undetectable
2/6/08 CD4- 401 VL- undetectable
5/7/08 CD4- 705 VL- undetectable
6/4/08 CD4- 775 VL- undetectable
8/6/08 CD4- 805 VL- undetectable
11/13/08 CD4- 774 VL--undetectable
2/4/09  CD4- 484  VL- 18,000 (2 months off meds)
3/3/09---Starting Back on Meds---
4/27/09 CD4- 664 VL-- undetectable
6/17/09 CD4- 438 VL- 439
8/09 CD4- 404 VL- 1,600
01-22-10-- CD4- 525 VL- 59,000
Cherish the simple things life has to offer

The Royal Blog

Offline confusedme

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Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #50 on: October 30, 2007, 09:28:07 PM »
NY, good luck getting the help you need to raise your child. On the upside, the military is great about making sure they hold up to their responsibilities. I had a friend whose ex husband was in the service. If he was ever behind on child support, one phone call to his Lt got him straightened out very quickly.

Queen, looks like our boys play at Philly next week. Glad to hear that you don't plan to go to blows with Rico's ex, though it sounds like she could use a lick or two. ;) I think it is sad that so many resort to that...and usually over the silliest things.
08/13/07 - Diagnosis confirmed
08/30/07 - T-cells 400, VL 6,500 (Baseline)
11/30/07 - T-cells 428, VL 9,950

Offline BT65

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Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #51 on: October 31, 2007, 06:04:05 AM »
Ny, glad you're posting here more.  Wow, so you found out you were poz almost when you found out you were pregnant.  I'm so glad they're made the advances they have in women with the virus who are pregnant.  Now you don't have to worry so much about having a baby with HIV.  And I do hope the father takes care of this child the way he's supposed to and doesn't screw around.  It sounds like Confused knows something about people in the military taking care of their kids.  So hopefully things won't go too bad.  And yes, it always helps to have someone in your corner with some power who knows what you're going through (the legal person).  That can only work to your advantage. 

As for me, I'm smoking right now.  I'm not going to chastize myself over it.  It's better than what I could be doing.  You know, in the past, I would've quit school, quit my job, gotten strung out on something and played the "poor me" game.  I'm so glad that, even though it's quite challenging, I don't do that now.  I know how much I can handle.  And I know what I'm capable of.  The algebra is driving me kind of crazy.  Right now we're covering "domains of functions" and I haven't a clue on how to do that.  If anyone does, please pm me.  Cin, do you know how to do these?  I've asked two people already who had to take some sort of math in college (people with their master's) and they can't remember.  So I might just have to e-mail my teacher and see if she can meet me early tomorrow night or something. 

I don't plan on smoking for a long stretch.  My sister called me last night and was telling me how she went over to check on my father and he couldn't breathe very well.  She had him use his nebulizer a few times, but he refused to go to the hospital.  The reason he did is because he knew they would admit him and then he wouldn't be able to smoke.  It's so bizarre, choosing smoking over breathing.  That's how much these things can get ahold of a person.  I don't want to end up like that, and I don't know a lot of people who can successfully smoke and not end up with some sort of breathing issue.

Anyway, happy Halloween!  Queen, what will you be doing today?  Will you be celebrating in any particular way?  I hope all of you ladies have a happy one.  Today is hump day.  Only two more days!
I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

tendai

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Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #52 on: October 31, 2007, 06:12:25 AM »
hey ladies
men will be our downfall if not the death of us. WTF is wrong with them?
NY i wish u the best of luck with your baby. dont let that so-and -so off the hook, he must help with the upkeep and all. he might be living a eat-drink-and-be-merry-for-tomorrow-we-die lifestyle but dont let it mess up yours and your baby's lives.
Queen, u preparing to go war with Rico's ex? if it were me i'd run fast the other way baby-mama-drama is a bit too much for me. i'd always feel sidelined. or maybe i'm the selfish type who wants her man all to herself..
Betty, i really hope u stop smoking soon. i dont smoke myself, never got that enjoyment that smokers talk about, i'm more of a passive smoker i like the aroma of everest menthol. i found it impossible to inhale while smoking so i gave up. and also my doctor advised me not when i got diagnosed. and good luck with the algebra!!

Offline camille07

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Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #53 on: October 31, 2007, 07:52:37 AM »
Hey ladies-

I've been reading the posts, but just quiet lately.  I went through a very dark period in the last few days, which can be exhausting and counter productive.

Happy Halloween!

hugs,

Cammie

tendai

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Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #54 on: October 31, 2007, 08:11:18 AM »
sorry to hear that Cammie.  hope its all better now.

Offline Nygurl225

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Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #55 on: October 31, 2007, 09:08:09 AM »
Thanks all for your support

Betty~~ I understand your stresses. I myself am a student and itís hard!! Donít beat yourself up over smoking. Take things one day at a time. I just hope  you can cut back or try to quit again soon. itís a hard habit to break (I was a smoker once) but getting rid of the cigs will benefit your health. I donít want to preach because I know how hard it is.  We are all human and fall off track sometimes. I hope  the stresses of school work ease up a bit for you. Iím feeling them too, but depending on where you go to school theres not much left to the semester. Best of luck!!

Tendai~ I agree with you.  Men will be our downfall!!!! Haha

Cammie~~ Sorry to hear about your ďdark periodĒ I think weíve all been there. Keep your head up, no matter what things always do get better!

Offline MOONLIGHT1114

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Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #56 on: October 31, 2007, 11:00:03 AM »
Hi GFs~

Cam~  I'm sorry you've been feeling down, but I'm glad you checked in.  Hang in there, ok?

BT~  You're right when you put it into perspective, you could be doing a lot worse things than smoking.  Would it help to set a date to quit again, or just wait until the pack is done?  Maybe make it last and smoke fewer each day?

NY~  I don't know what to say.  You and I are both poz but the paths our lives have taken us down are very different.  Just know that I will try to be supportive when I can.

Queen~  I have to agree with Cristy and Tendai on Rico.  When I read that he cut the date short to get diapers for someone else's kid?  Hell-O?  Red flag.....He may be fun to date, but already it sounds like you are going to have to step way back and not expect much from this guy.  It sounds like he may have his priorities mixed up and has a hard time saying "no" to anyone, not sure just yet.

I got my vacuum Sunday before the Skins got their asses whooped, lol!  I haven't used it yet, way too tired to vacuum, besides, no one is coming over, I don't even have a couch!   :D   I have a date for this Friday with a new guy.  He wanted to take me out tonight, but I am kind of sentimental about this Halloween, thinking I wouldn't even be living here this Fall.  So, since I'm here, I figure I would do my part and give out candy while the rugrats fall into my flower box out front!  LOL  I dressed up as a Mouseketeer last year, I might do that again tonight, but its pretty cold, so I may just bundle up.

So, the new guy, I have to think of a nickname for him.  Hmmmm, maybe "Iceman" since he plays ice hockey and loves to watch the sport.  We have talked on the phone every other day it seems, and I have been tired, having to end the conversation sometimes.  He's fun to talk to, upbeat, good sense of humor, but its almost like he is a friend, yikes!  But wait, isn't that how its supposed to start?  So, crazy me, I agreed to a date during my Friday group session, which I haven't missed since I started going on 9/14.  I may go to group for an hour and then cut across town to meet Iceman for the date.  I am nervous because he is newly divorced and I don't think he has dated anyone yet.  Yes, he's HIV-, so way to go Cindy, might be scaring the shit out of another one.  He is a Scorpio like me, so maybe there will be some chemistry.  He's really a family man, thinks the world of his kids, and seems to have good balance in his life.  He wants to take me to a really nice restaurant.  I tried to back down, I always do that, but he insisted, so it should be a nice time.

Jay has stayed in touch almost every day via IM which has been nice.  He's been busy every weekend pretty much, but maybe he'll ask me out again.  I think he will.  He called this morning briefly when the IM didn't work for him, I can't remember the last time I spoke with him, its all been IM.  Maybe it was the night I disclosed on 10/17?

Been speaking to another guy in Annapolis who is pos and also has HepC.  He really wants to meet me but has been going through a lot of crap concerning custody of one of his kids.  He hasn't started taking meds but is supposed to.  I think I have been a good influence on him, trying to encourage him to get things in order.  He is very intelligent, but has a lot on his plate right now.  It will settle down soon, from what I can see.  He wants to take me on a boat ride on the Bay.  Guess I'd better get my parka ready, lol!

Off to see my diabetic doc today, and I haven't written down any of my sugars.  Maybe I should do that.  I am also going to ask about this cold thing and see what he says.  I didn't take cold meds this morning and I'm doing pretty good, but still congested.

More soon!  Happy Halloween!

~ Cindy

HIV+ since '93, 1/12 - CD4 785 and undet.   WOO-HOO!!

Offline srmn98

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Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #57 on: October 31, 2007, 11:50:02 AM »
Hi Everybody,

Happy Halloween !!!  I don't think I am doing anything tonight, but I did go to a friend's party last Saturday and had lots of fun. :)

Lots of stories going on here ... since I'm just getting to know everybody it is hard to keep everything straight !!!

Cindy -- I like the name Iceman. sweet. :) It is nice when they insist on taking you to dinner, right ? :) Have fun and I hope he turns out to be a really nice guy.

Cammie -- hope you pull out of the dark period .... sounds like by posting you already are ....

Queen --  I love reading your posts and am curious about Rico. He sounds confused ....  but he's a man, right ?  ;)  (just kidding !)

Anyway ... busy day at work so this is just a quick post. My man and I had a long talk over the weekend and are trying to lift some of the pressure and expectations of our relationship. We are trying to just enjoy being together and not worry too much about what will or will not happen. It has been really powerful -- ever since we laid it all out on the table, things have been a lot lighter, a lot happier. So .. now I just have to keep reminding myself to live one day at a time, in the moment, etc. It helps me feel more grounded.

Take care,

Sara


Offline Nygurl225

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Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #58 on: October 31, 2007, 12:56:26 PM »
Hey Cin~~ Well first of all god luck with your date. I hope all goes well. As for our lives taking different paths I can understand where your comming from and I thank you for your support as I will offer mine when needed aswell. I think with that being said all of us women have had or are having different experiances and are at different places in our lives. Thats the thing about this Virus, it doesn't matter who you are what you have done or where you are going. It truly doesn't discriminate. But it is the one common thread we all share.

Queen~~ back to your situation with Rico. It seems to me theres too much attachment between himself and the baby momma still. I'm not one to tell others what I think they should do but what advice I will give is, go into this with open eyes. Try and see the reality of his situation and don't put up with being 2nd best to anyone! I hope things work out for you no matter what you choose to do about Rico.

Offline Queen Tokelove

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Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #59 on: October 31, 2007, 01:22:25 PM »
Happy Halloween, Ladies....Not sure what I am going to do for today yet. I have an appointment with my ID doc today. I am hoping that I will get good news. I know my viral load will not be back in time but am hoping that my cd4 has gone up some, 2 months ago it was 215 and I started the Atripla. But I have noticed that I don't sleep as much and I have been feeling pretty good. So let's just hope that is a good sign. Being that Halloween is a Pagan holiday, I will more than likely do something. My roomie will be handing out candy to the Bebe's of the neighborhood, hell bad as they have been during the summer, the little rugrats don't deserve any damn candy. Bah Humbug, I say...... ;D

Yep, Rico did get pampers for someone else's kid. I had a tude about it but he is a nice guy and doesn't know how to say no..I think the problem with the ex is that she was the first one he had sex with and you know how that goes. So, she feels like she has some sort of pussy control over him, sorry for being crude with it. But last I knew he hadn't had any in over 2 years from anyone so she is probably leading him on more than anything. Now Your Majesty's poonani has gotten reviews for being the bomb but it has been 2 years since it has seen any action. But in all honesty, I am not trying to play the sex card right now and am really taking things slow, like at a turtle's pace slow. He did call me yesterday and we talked for a few. He wants to get together tomorrow sometime but he said he would call to confirm on Thursday, so I think he learned something from me talking to him about not calling.

What I have realized in the short period of time is that I am not sure that I want to be in a relationship. I think I have gotten independent and set in my ways and sometimes I think if I invest in a relationship that I will lose that independence. I guess I want my cake and eat it too. I want to be able to be with someone but on my terms, I know that sounds selfish but that is kinda how I am feeling. I want a guy who can hold his own, not automatically want to shack up with me which seems to have happened with every guy I have ever been involved with. I feel like I need my space and I like how things are now with my roomie. We have no issues and get along without a hitch. We respect each other's space and each other. Maybe it's because we are both Capricorns..... ;D

I also think disclosure is playing a part in this too. For those of you who don't know, disclosure has been a terrible experience for me except for when I disclosed to my room mate who accepted it w/o question. Short version, my sisters went out of their way to disclose my status w/o giving me the chance to do so and because of that I lost a few people in my life, including my husband, our marriage lasted 6 months but have been apart for 6 years. Anyhoo, not that I am in a rush to tell Rico just yet since I am feeling him out. But I can't stop thinking about when the time comes and we get intimate. As of today, I am not sure what I would do. I know it would be protected sex but it goes back to the disclosure thing. I know the right thing would be to disclose but I am afraid of the rejection, I guess that is pretty much it. But I may just be worrying for nothing because who knows how things may turn out. One thing I do know is that he doesn't have an issue with wearing condoms, found that out after watching a Valtrex commercial... ;D

Sara-- It seems like most do like reading my posts and I appreciate that. I am just a very outspoken person and I say what's on my mind or from the heart. I try to be funny at times because who doesn't need a good laugh from time to time.

Cindy--- Iceman, huh. That handle sounds like he's a hitman... :D But Iceman was also a comic book hero with the X-Men. Just thought I would throw a little tv trivia your way.... ;) Just imagining you as a mouseketeer.... ;D Even if you don't have any furniture, you need to try the vacuum out. Are you looking for furniture on freecycle? Throw a WANT out there. I haven't been able to snag anything lately, kinda hard since I have no car at the moment.

Cammie--- Hey, good to see you. I hope Halloween pulls you out of the funk you've been in.

Tendai--- The drama really doesn't affect me at all. I just can spot the games she is playing with him. Since we are just getting to know each other, I don't feel it is my place to speak to him on it. I do get to voice my opinion to my girl who is his ex's sister, so she usually runs some type of interference to her sister or tries to show Rico how her sister is playing him. Now remember that Rico is still shy regardless of the fact that we both like watching wrestling, so usually I am the one to engage in conversation first. But even that has gotten better.

Betty--- Sorry to hear that your father is being stubborn again. I just don't understand why he will not accept the help of a home nurse since he hates going to the hospital and being admitted. I feel for you and your siblings.

It's getting to be about that time for me to get ready for my doc appointment. I will check back in later with at least my cd 4 results. I had to pee in a cup too which he usually doesn't ask for so I have to see what that was all about. Have a good day ...... :-* :-* :-* :-*
Started Atripla/Ziagen on 9/13/07.
10/31/07 CD4-265 VL- undetectable
2/6/08 CD4- 401 VL- undetectable
5/7/08 CD4- 705 VL- undetectable
6/4/08 CD4- 775 VL- undetectable
8/6/08 CD4- 805 VL- undetectable
11/13/08 CD4- 774 VL--undetectable
2/4/09  CD4- 484  VL- 18,000 (2 months off meds)
3/3/09---Starting Back on Meds---
4/27/09 CD4- 664 VL-- undetectable
6/17/09 CD4- 438 VL- 439
8/09 CD4- 404 VL- 1,600
01-22-10-- CD4- 525 VL- 59,000
Cherish the simple things life has to offer

The Royal Blog

Offline MOONLIGHT1114

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Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #60 on: October 31, 2007, 02:22:03 PM »
GQ~  "poonani" is cracking me up over here, lol!  You had to pee in a cup most likely for a kidney function, maybe cause of the new meds.

I yelled at some punkass out front of my house who had his Crown Vic backed in with the trunk open.  He didn't hear me until I was right behind him in my bathrobe yelling for the third time.  His subwolfers were shaking my house and I don't tolerate that shit -- at all.  I take your tag, hunt you down, figure out where you live and call the police next time.  He was in a visitor spot so I TOLD him, did not ask him, to turn it down or go somewhere else.  He didn't say a word, damn punkass.  Why couldn't he be blasting "Peace Sells" by Megadeth instead?  It IS Halloween!

Grrrrrrr!

More later, I might wear my bat earrings and spooky hat with the spider hanging off of it tonight, instead.

~ Cindy
HIV+ since '93, 1/12 - CD4 785 and undet.   WOO-HOO!!

Offline Queen Tokelove

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Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #61 on: October 31, 2007, 05:08:15 PM »
Well, I found out that I had to pee in the cup to check for syphillis and gonerhea or however you spell it..Of course the viral load wasn't back yet. My cd4 went up from 215 to 265 for being on meds since 9/13 but I just feel disappointed, I thought it would've been better. I wrote more in a thread in the Living With section...I'll check back in later.... :-\
Started Atripla/Ziagen on 9/13/07.
10/31/07 CD4-265 VL- undetectable
2/6/08 CD4- 401 VL- undetectable
5/7/08 CD4- 705 VL- undetectable
6/4/08 CD4- 775 VL- undetectable
8/6/08 CD4- 805 VL- undetectable
11/13/08 CD4- 774 VL--undetectable
2/4/09  CD4- 484  VL- 18,000 (2 months off meds)
3/3/09---Starting Back on Meds---
4/27/09 CD4- 664 VL-- undetectable
6/17/09 CD4- 438 VL- 439
8/09 CD4- 404 VL- 1,600
01-22-10-- CD4- 525 VL- 59,000
Cherish the simple things life has to offer

The Royal Blog

Offline aserenityseeker

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Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #62 on: October 31, 2007, 05:09:14 PM »
Hi ladies, Just wanted to pop in and say hello. I have read the new thread to catch up. Have been busy this week with my dad having surgery to remove a blood clot in his leg and groin areas. He had his right leg amputated earlier this year. He is doing OK tho.  I am going to have dinner and go trick or treating with my family. My sister has an 8 year old daughter and a 12 year old son , both I adore. I have fun with them and enjoy them as my daughter is 21 now and lives in San Francisco going to college. She will be home in a few weeks for an early turkey day.  I am going well emotionally and able to leave the house more which is good for me  :-X I have my Vegas trip which starts Sunday and I will be back Tuesday so cant wait. Seeing Cirques " Love" at the Mirage and also seeing physic Silvia Brown at Excalibur. Got a great room rate $61 so cant beat that. I have gone to Vegas alone before but never to any shows alone so new one for me. I go to movies alone a lot so kinda the same.  I got to lead an AA meeting last night at the woman's stag here and it was really great. I chose Ego/Pride as the topic. I needed to hear what others had to share on the topic. helps me a lot.

Bye for now. Dawn
Positive since: 1993
T-cells: 543
Viral load: Undetectable
Meds: Truvada & Kaletra

Positive, Alive and Seeking Serenity :)

Offline Dragonette

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Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #63 on: October 31, 2007, 06:07:35 PM »
Happy Halloweeen everybody!!

I have had a hell of a day, I wanted to write eariler but I didn't have time, stayed at work till after 20.00 and since I slept very few hours, I am off to bed now. Hope you all have a great evening. Hang in there...

Catch you later ladies,
"If you keep one foot in yesterday, and one in tomorrow, you piss all over today". Betty Tacy

Offline BT65

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Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #64 on: November 01, 2007, 06:53:23 AM »
Good morning ladies,

Well, another day.  I'm really sick right now.  It started right after work.  My temp today is 100.4 and my throat is soar, stuffed up nose etc.  I probably shouldn't go to work but I will probably drag my ass in there.  I will probably also start taking my Bactrim twice a day instead of the usual once a day.  I'll probably call my doc this morning also to see if they can get me in sometime today.  One thing I've learned is to not let things get out-of-hand when a temp's involved. 

Cin, Iceman, eh?  Cute.  So, did you dress up for Halloween?  On my way to school last night I saw kids out trick-or-treating and there were some pretty cute costumes.  I haven't dressed up in years.  The last time I did it was for an NA costume dance.  I hope your "cold" is doing better.  Please take care of yourself.

Queen, don't stress about the CD4 count.  It takes them awhile to creep back up there.  Back in '94, my CD4 count was like 10 and it took about four years for it to break 200.  I don't know what it is at this moment, but the last test I had I think it was in the 500's.  Your viral load has most likely come way down.  You haven't felt sick at all lately have you?  Usually we see changes in our viral load first before our T-cells go up any significant amount.  Thank God for the new meds!  If this was in the days of AZT, ddI and ddC, we'd all be in more trouble than we already get ourselves into. ;)  Anyway, don't despair.  Do you know when the viral load will be back?  Oh, hey, did you do anything for Halloween?  And isn't today something, some sort of holiday?  All Hollow's Day or something?  It seems like I heard something like that on the radio on the way home from school. 

Cammie, great to hear from you.  Whenever you're ready to talk, we're here to listen.  Or pm me if you'd like.  I do hope you're going to pull out of that dark period soon.  We all do go through those times, so know that you're not alone, ever. 

Anyone I've missed, I apologize.  I hope you all are doing good.  I'm still debating on whether or not to go to work or just try to go to the docs.  More later-
I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

Offline cjc

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Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #65 on: November 01, 2007, 08:00:10 AM »
Hello ladies. Hope everyone is well. Had last night off work and robert and i went out trick or treating. He was a Fire Chief. We went to town hall and he got to "put out" a real fire. We had lots of fun and got lots of candy. I will hand it out a little at a time.     Betty, hope you get to feeling better. Queen, hope that everything works out well with Rico. He may have potential but I hope you are careful. You are THE QUEEN, you deserve the best.                                     Sara, nice to hear from you.                                        ML, hope Iceman works out well                            I put up a new picture on the profiles so maybe that will heat things up. I will take it back down in a couple days.    Take care, must go do laundry. Later, Cristy                   

Offline Queen Tokelove

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Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #66 on: November 01, 2007, 10:51:50 PM »
Howdy Girls...Not much to report really...My viral load was still not available so I will have to call on Monday. I can now only get my Atripla filled every 23 days because they cost too much..More on that in my thread in the Living With section...

Basically I am just unwinding after being poked by needles 3 times this week. My arm is a bit sore from the flu shot and my butt from the depo shot. I thought that qualified me to have a Corona along with the good green. We actually got a case but we gave our girl a 6 pack and we will have company tomorrow including Rico so the rest will prolly be knocked off then.

I am seeing a few of you ladies aren't feeling too well. I hope you get better soon. I think with Cindy it was allergies and I think Betty has a sinus infection along with bronchitis...Eww, what a combo, maybe it's because of the change in the weather. I have been sniffling but I guess that is because I got caught in the rain last night.

That's about it for me. After wrestling, going to watch 30 days of Night. I remember Iggy said it was good so after watching I will prolly give my critique in my movies thread in Off Topic. Have a good night everyone... :-*
Started Atripla/Ziagen on 9/13/07.
10/31/07 CD4-265 VL- undetectable
2/6/08 CD4- 401 VL- undetectable
5/7/08 CD4- 705 VL- undetectable
6/4/08 CD4- 775 VL- undetectable
8/6/08 CD4- 805 VL- undetectable
11/13/08 CD4- 774 VL--undetectable
2/4/09  CD4- 484  VL- 18,000 (2 months off meds)
3/3/09---Starting Back on Meds---
4/27/09 CD4- 664 VL-- undetectable
6/17/09 CD4- 438 VL- 439
8/09 CD4- 404 VL- 1,600
01-22-10-- CD4- 525 VL- 59,000
Cherish the simple things life has to offer

The Royal Blog

Offline vivyt

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Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #67 on: November 01, 2007, 10:57:54 PM »
Wow! I guess I better keep up with the posting. Too much has gone in since I last checked in.  :) I have been very busy the last couple of weeks. I am a teacher and this is the time of year when things start to get crazy. Halloween really wiped me out.

It seems like everyone is doing OK. I myself am feeling much better. I think I just hit a rough patch which is bound to happen. I don't really have anything much to add. I have been feeling tired lately but that could just be  the job. I just went in for some blood work and I am hoping that  my count has continued to go up. We shall see...talk to you all later!

Offline confusedme

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Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #68 on: November 02, 2007, 12:17:33 AM »
Hi all. We took the kiddo trick or treating last night. I was too tired to log in but I wish I had anyway. I feel so behind. Not much else going on right now. Work has me worn out. I work in retail and the first of the month is always busy plus it was truck day. I'll check in tomorrow after I rest up and cash my check.
08/13/07 - Diagnosis confirmed
08/30/07 - T-cells 400, VL 6,500 (Baseline)
11/30/07 - T-cells 428, VL 9,950

Offline BT65

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Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #69 on: November 02, 2007, 07:49:19 AM »
Good morning ladies:

Yes, I am pretty sick.  I started running a fever Wednesday along with hacking and blowing up some pretty rancid shit. So I went to the doctor's yesterday and he told me I have a sinus infection along with bronchitis and to top it all off, a little of the stomach flu.  So he wrote me off work until Monday.  Yesterday my fever hit 101.6, then last night before I had to go to class it was 100.4.  I really didn't feel like going to class, but our classes are only eight weeks long, so if one class is missed, there's a big hole and it's almost impossible to catch up.  Especially last night's class, as it was my algebra class.  Yuck!  Anyway, the doc prescribed me an antibiotic and asked me if I wanted him to give me something for the cough/blowing.  I told him thank you, but no.  Those kind of things make my heart pound, so I declined.  I'm sure it will start clearing up.  I'm going to up my water intake also and start on some vitamin C. 

Cin has been rather quiet the last couple of days.  Are you still with us lady?  And how about Drag, Cammie, Em etc.?  I miss people when they don't post regularly.  I understand, we've all got things going on in our lives.  OK, on with the day-
I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

Offline Dragonette

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Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #70 on: November 02, 2007, 09:05:08 AM »
Hi Betty

I am sorry to hear... get well soon, take care of yourself this weekend, I understand why you wouldn't want to miss class, but time off work is a good idea...

I am OK, I have had 4 back to back appts at the hospital so missed a ton of work too. One good thing about this job, no one cares when I come, go or leave, so I get into no trouble at all keeping all these appts. It's just my responsibility to do this job well but where or how I do it is my biz. I can say the last months I have been really lax. Life caught up with me, the reality of living with this disease. I have let work go, and I am trying to get back in, and it aint always easy, esp now that I have to do a lot of boring mechanical stuff (gathering and categorizing data). But no complaints here, the last 2 years have been so trying, there is no way I would've lasted in another job.

This is the good side of the work, the bad side is ppl are very ambitious and competetive, and often harsh and criticizing, and I really have no energy for overachieveing right now. I'd just rather float downstream.

I saw a neaurologist and he confirmed that I am losing the sensation on my feet so he wants to run an EMG, I am waiting for the appt. I hate that here, they don't lat you make your own, just send you a letter, and what if you are unavailable or away? Esp at the hospital, they act like if you have some problem, than you have to be 100% fulltime sick. I saw an eye doctor, everything is fine with my eyes (phew). I saw the ID doc. and I saw a gynecologist, I went with my BF and we discussed having a baby and the method used. But we are not starting anything yet. I'd like to, and then I am terrified b/c nothing will be the same again. I don't see myself going back home, although there is the horrible feeling that my parents will grow old alone, I just can't face the country right now. Then again, I want to spend the rest of my life with BF and he with me, we both know that but having a child would really make it official, even more than marriage. And now he is applying for jobs anywhere in Europe so who knows where we will end up, but probabaly eventually in Spain, for good, and that is so scary to admit that I will not be going back to take care of my parents when they need me. Esp since my brother also left (to another country than me). So I just try not to think about it and just live day by day, but it's scary.

That's a little bit about what I'm going thru and why I am keeping quiet. It's at times when I face my fears head-on such as writing this post that I want to smoke badly.

Queen I hope you have a nice evening with Rico and the rest, I like corona too but I stopped drinking now on the new meds as well (easier than stopping smoking since I didn't do that often). Hope you two get the time to know each other with no interference, urgent request etc.

Cin, I hope you're not writing b/c you're having a great time with Jay... I hope all is OK with you

Cristy, I'm glad you had a great Halloween and also what you wrote that you are thinking about dating your friend who's ok with you being poz, that's just awsome.

Cammie, there is light at the end of the tunnel... pls feel free to PM me if you want a shoulder.

Viv, i am so glad to know you're better.
Everyone else, Em, Tendai, Sara, Confused, I am thinking of you... hugs
« Last Edit: November 02, 2007, 09:31:37 AM by Dragonette »
"If you keep one foot in yesterday, and one in tomorrow, you piss all over today". Betty Tacy

Offline Queen Tokelove

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Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #71 on: November 02, 2007, 11:08:37 AM »
Just doing a drive by before I get my day of running errands started. Sorry to hear you are sick, Betty. That fever doesn't sound good at all. Have you been taking tylenol and applying cold compresses? Maybe that will help. Not sure what is going on with Cindy, I left her an IM last night on Yahoo, will leave her another asking her to check in.

That's it for now or I'll never leave. I will try to get back here before company arrives tonight.....
Started Atripla/Ziagen on 9/13/07.
10/31/07 CD4-265 VL- undetectable
2/6/08 CD4- 401 VL- undetectable
5/7/08 CD4- 705 VL- undetectable
6/4/08 CD4- 775 VL- undetectable
8/6/08 CD4- 805 VL- undetectable
11/13/08 CD4- 774 VL--undetectable
2/4/09  CD4- 484  VL- 18,000 (2 months off meds)
3/3/09---Starting Back on Meds---
4/27/09 CD4- 664 VL-- undetectable
6/17/09 CD4- 438 VL- 439
8/09 CD4- 404 VL- 1,600
01-22-10-- CD4- 525 VL- 59,000
Cherish the simple things life has to offer

The Royal Blog

Offline MOONLIGHT1114

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Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #72 on: November 02, 2007, 11:25:03 AM »
Hi GFs~

BT get better!  Don't push it going into work and school if you have a fever!

I am fine, Queen posted while I was catching up.  Here's why I've been gone, its kinda funny!  LOL

I was in the shower yest at 330pm and heard this horrible noise.  It was the smoke alarm in the hallway!  I have lived here 14 years and it has never gone off before.  So, I wrap my wet hair in a towel, get my robe on and try to calm Cheech down, who is running in circles upstairs.  The noise was deafening!  I didn't smell smoke, grabbed my phones and made my way to the basement to call my Dad where it was quieter.  I spoke with his manager and while I did the alarm kinda got "garbled" sounding -- it wasn't a steady impending doom noise anymore, so I thought the battery was dying.  I made it to the breaker box and flicked the switch.  Ahhhhh, the damn thing shut up, but I had no lights and no working outlets on the top floor of my house last night! 

Turns out there is no battery in this hardwired smoke alarm and its probably got 24 years of gunk inside of it that was making it go off sporadically yest.  My father came by this morning with a ladder, cause the damn thing is right above the stairwell, and he disconnected the alarm.  So, now I have power upstairs and my computer can be used again!  Yay!

What a pain in the ass that all was last night!  I finally DID use my new vacuum, in the dark, at the top of the stairs, trying to clean off any dust or gunk that was in and around the alarm.  I was exhausted.

I have my Iceman date tonight and we are both pretty excited.  Of course, I have my skeleton in my closet, but don't we all?  It will be fun to meet this guy, I just wonder how it will go?  He's very confident and friendly, and new to the dating thing.  I wonder if I should even kiss him goodnight?  LOL  As I was typing that last sentence, I thought, "Damn straight, I should!"  He just thinks I'm a nice sweet girl, but I know better!  ;)  I can't believe its been a month since my last date with Stone.  October sucked this year, all around.

I have been talking with Mr. Annapolis who lives over an hour away, through DC traffic.  He is the guy who is pos and also has HCV (HepC), or is it HVC, correct my acronym if its wrong, someone, lol.  Last night he told me on the phone that he caught herpes as well from a chick he dated earlier this year.  I tell you, herpes scares me more than HIV and Hep, as crazy as it sounds.  I mean, a condom will protect you from HIV and Hep, but herpes, well, isn't it also transmitted via skin to skin contact, if not just by kissing?  I have heard too many stories about people who are on herpes meds and don't think they are suffering an outbreak, yet somehow they pass it to their partner.  Anyone who is dealing with this who would like to respond, I would appreciate it.  I wanted to go visit Mr. Annapolis this weekend, but if I can't even kiss the guy then I'd better stay away.  We have developed a deep connection over the phone, but I can't risk catching something else from a mere kiss, and I can't date someone who is 75 miles away.

So, the Iceman cometh, lol......  ;)

Also, took my first 24-hour allergy tab last night, not sure if its helping, on a nasal steroid spray which should kick in in a few more days, and I got my flu shot and haven't fallen over.

Just need a damn job, already!

~ Cindy
« Last Edit: November 02, 2007, 03:23:04 PM by MOONLIGHT1114 »
HIV+ since '93, 1/12 - CD4 785 and undet.   WOO-HOO!!

Offline srmn98

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Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #73 on: November 02, 2007, 01:59:02 PM »
Hey All,

Cindy -- just wanted to respond. I have herpes -- I got it from the second guy I ever slept with back in 2000 I think. I was devastated at the time -- it's almost funny now looking back since now I have HIV too. Personally, herpes (HSV = Herpes Simplex Virus) has not been a big problem for me. I take medicine (Valtrex)  for it if I think I am going to have a breakout, but it has been years since I have had any symptoms. It is not something you want to get, especially with an impaired immune system -- but at least for me it has been a very small issue. I have undetectable VL and high CD4 though -- so I do not want to say that because I am not having problems that others would not -- or that I will not eventually have problems -- but so far it has not been a big issue.

There are two kinds of HSV -- one is called HSV-1 and one is called HSV-2. Generally, HSV-1 is the kind people get on their lips -- so basically a cold sore on your lips is usually HSV-1. HSV-2 is generally genital herpes. It is possible if you go down on somebody that has genital herpes that you could get it on your lips (i.e. you would get cold sores) and if somebody with a cold sore goes down on you, it is possible to get genital herpes. But if your guy does not have a cold sore or bleeding lips (yuck !) kissing should not be an issue. I think that something like 90% of Americans get cold sores .... they are super contageous, but doesn't mean you cannot kiss somebody that gets them, you just don't do it while they have one.

I think one of the main issues with it is that it makes you more susceptible to catching other STDs. Which might explain how I got HIV even though I always used condoms for sex ... I'm not sure. I'd talk to a doctor about your worries-- if it gets to the point where you like this guy, I think you can totally work it out.

Just my two cents. :)

Sara
« Last Edit: November 02, 2007, 02:02:56 PM by srmn98 »

Offline MOONLIGHT1114

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Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #74 on: November 02, 2007, 03:31:03 PM »
Hi Sara~

Thanks for giving me the play by play on herpes.  I sometimes get cancre sores on the side of my tongue, maybe once or twice a year.  Is that considered herpes as well?  This guy says he gets sores INSIDE of his mouth, I'm thinking on the inside of his cheek.  I would just hate to introduce something into my immune system on top of HIV and diabetes.  Like I said, and like those commercials say, lots of transmission occurs when someone doesn't think they are suffering an outbreak.  I wonder if you were suffering an outbreak, in the mouth for example, would it be that obvious?  Is there a time at the onset of the outbreak where the person may not think they could pass the virus, when in fact they really could (pass the virus)?

Yep, I want the nitty gritty, I'll have to look this up online as well, but I appreciate you sharing your firsthand experience.  Also, this guy hasn't treated his HIV or HepC yet for various reasons, per his doctor, so I just feel like he may be a ticking time bomb for a nasty infection.  I told him so, and have encouraged him to start treatment.  He is supposed to start Atripla soon.

~ Cindy
« Last Edit: November 03, 2007, 02:02:59 AM by MOONLIGHT1114 »
HIV+ since '93, 1/12 - CD4 785 and undet.   WOO-HOO!!

Offline srmn98

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Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #75 on: November 02, 2007, 04:01:14 PM »
Hey Cindy,

Well ... I'm not a doctor or an expert, but from what I know, the sores people get on the inside of their mouths are cancer sores. They are not totally sure what causes them -- I have read that they are not contageous but I don't know if that is true. I would imagine that a cancer sore would make you more susceptible to viruses entering your body  -- but again I don't know. I used to get them a lot when I was a kid -- but I have noticed that I get them less when I don't eat/drink a lot of acidic stuff like orange juice. Again, that's just me.

I'm wondering if maybe the bigger question with this guy would be is he taking care of himself ? I think we all put a lot of effort into taking care of ourselves ... and from what you write, I think you deserve somebody that does the same. I think sometimes it is hard to think about dating somebody who is negative -- and putting ourselves out there like that --- but we should try to remember that it is possible and that we should not change our standards because we are POZ. If you like this guy I say go for it but be careful because he might not be taking care of himself and he might be looking for somebody else to do that for him ....   and we have enough on our hands, right ?

I'd say DEFINITELY talk to your doctor if you decide you like this guy and want to make it physical. I think if you love somebody and it is worth it you can work through anything ... but you don't want to put your immune system at further risk for a fling or for a guy who turns out to be a fling ... you know ?

I'd also be more worried about Hep C than anything else..... but you don't get that by kissing so just make sure you are safe if you have sex with him.

Keep us updated... and if you see him, have fun !!  Get to know him and stay safe !!

:)

Sara

Offline BT65

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Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #76 on: November 02, 2007, 08:34:08 PM »
Good evening ladies:

I did go to class last night. It was algebra class and being that the classes are only eight weeks long, if I didn't go, I would've been in a hole.  Tonight I'm feeling a little better. I just hope my boss doesn't mind, as I haven't been there that long.

Anyway, Cin, about the HCV (hep C virus).  My best friend has HCV.  Her doctor told her he has never seen it passed between heterosexual couples.  I think there might be some evidence out there proving this fact.  Oh, where is Ann when we need her?  She knows a lot about this kind of stuff.  Maybe you should pm her.  Not sure about herpes.  It seems like Sara has given you some sage advice.  I used to get cold sores in my mouth when I ate or drank things that had high acidic content in them when I was a kid.  But I rarely get them anymore.  Glad you got your smoke alarm thing fixed.  I'm anxiously awaiting to see how your date went.

Queen, did you say you are seeing Rico tonight?  I'm interested to know how that goes and if you can complete a full night together.

Drag, it sounds like you're kind of up-in-the-air right now.  Having a baby is a wonderful thing.  But you want to make sure you're adequately prepared to handle it.  I know you will.  You have a good head on your shoulders. 

I wonder how Em and Cammie are doing?  Anyone hear from them? 

To all the rest of you ladies, I hope all is well.  I'm going to see what else is going on in these parts of the world and watch a little t.v.  I did some homework tonight but have a lot more facing me this weekend.  Such is life.......
I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

Offline vivyt

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Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #77 on: November 02, 2007, 10:23:52 PM »
I received the "wonderful gift" of herpes from the one who gave me HIV. I did not even know what it was, just that the pain was the worst I had ever experienced. After my first outbreak everything went downhill from there. I became sick with all kinds of things, rashes, yeast infections, weight loss, hair loss, throat pain...I lived at the doctor for a little over a year when I finally told my ENT about the herpes. I did not tell any other doctor before this because I was embarrassed. Once I disclosed about this he said I should have an HIV test and the rest is history. All the sickness made sense once I had the diagnosis. Since I have been on meds I have only had 1 outbreak and it was mild. Before my diagnosis I was having them almost every month during the year of unknown ailments. What a nightmare! Anyways...my doctor said the two (HIV and Herpes) usually go hand in hand.

Offline Nygurl225

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Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #78 on: November 02, 2007, 11:20:54 PM »
Hello ladies! I hope everything is going well for all of you!

Cin~ I hope you have a great time on your date. As far as Herpes I can't be of any assistance. I've never had an STD. HIV is my first. What I do know is that there are many other things that can cause sores, cold sores chancre sores and so on. But with our compromised immune system why take a chance.

Betty~~ I feel your pain. Going to class sick really sucks. Iím glad to hear your feeling better!! Hopefully you fully recover soon.

As for me. Mr. Military told one of my friends that he hasnít called because Iíve been bitchy lately. He doesnít seem to get that being 9 months pregnant alone with no help can make anyone irritable. I guess expecting a little help is being bitchy!! I refuse to call him because I see no reason to frustrate myself.  Funny thing is he also told my friend that he wants to move me to where he is and wants to be with me, blah, blah, blah. He claims he has things he needs to take care of first since he just returned home from over seas. It all does make sense but Iím trying hard not to get my hopes up. Men talk a lot of BS to make themselves look good. 

Iím feeling pretty shitty these days. Everything just aches and my body is done with carrying this baby. I canít wait for it to be all over and done with. Hopefully soon. Only 4 weeks to my due date!!  As of right now I feel pretty helpless. Iím just sitting back and praying everything falls into place with this baby Mr. Military and life in general. I guess Iím a bit down today.

Well, Iím off to bed. Iím worn out mentally and physically. I hope everyone is having a great Friday evening!! Night, Night all!!!

Offline Queen Tokelove

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Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #79 on: November 03, 2007, 01:37:51 AM »
Just popped in to read some posts before playing Diner Dash and thought I would leave you guys with a few tidbits. Rico made it over along with a few other friends and we got to spend some time alone....*whispers* in my bedroom....aw, hell no, I didn't give up no booty, get your minds out of the gutter.... :D The phone rang....... Tune in tomorrow for details..... ;D Nighty night...... :-*
Started Atripla/Ziagen on 9/13/07.
10/31/07 CD4-265 VL- undetectable
2/6/08 CD4- 401 VL- undetectable
5/7/08 CD4- 705 VL- undetectable
6/4/08 CD4- 775 VL- undetectable
8/6/08 CD4- 805 VL- undetectable
11/13/08 CD4- 774 VL--undetectable
2/4/09  CD4- 484  VL- 18,000 (2 months off meds)
3/3/09---Starting Back on Meds---
4/27/09 CD4- 664 VL-- undetectable
6/17/09 CD4- 438 VL- 439
8/09 CD4- 404 VL- 1,600
01-22-10-- CD4- 525 VL- 59,000
Cherish the simple things life has to offer

The Royal Blog

Offline MOONLIGHT1114

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Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #80 on: November 03, 2007, 03:18:42 AM »
Queen~  Whatcho doing in that avatar, lol?  AND what did you do with Rico-Bunny?  LOL  You know your fan club anxiously awaits the news!

NY~  I can't imagine being 9 months along, I have never had kids.  My back hurts and all I am carrying is a lipo belly.  I feel for you, girl, I really do.  Please don't be down, you know that your emotions are running high, what with getting ready to bring a little one into this world.  We're all here for you, you know that.  :)

Viv~  Thanks for your feedback on herpes.  Only one outbreak since being on meds?  Wow, that is amazing and good to hear!  Kinda gives me hope to hear all of these stories from you ladies, about living with herpes as well. 

BT~  Oh girl, hang in there with being sick.  How is the fever doing?  I didn't get one with my "cold" but silly me, it was allergies as you all know by now.  BT, you asked a few posts ago about "domain functions" in algebra.  Is that the f(x) stuff ("f of x")?  Its been so long, but I'll search it online this weekend to see if its something I can help you with.  PM me, ok?  How is the smoking going?  Regular puffs or cutting back?   :D

Sara~  Mr. Annapolis has had to spend beaucoup bucks on an attorney to get joint custody of his young son.  He only found out a couple of years ago that he even existed.  So, he is dealing with a crazy ex, trying to switch jobs, was in a car accident a few weeks ago cause a tire blew out, poor guy has SO much going on, but he is a real trooper, and has a good game plan and some supportive buddies.  Unfortunately, he hasn't kept up with his insurance claims for prescriptions this year, and he and his two sons are on one plan.  So now he's supposed to go on Atripla and can't afford the $1000 for it.  Because he hasn't submitted his paperwork for previous claims, insurance has no idea that his deductible has been met!  Ugh!  So, I told him to start sorting that paperwork and get his butt in gear so that he can get on Atripla for the simple price of a copay.  What worries me most is the HCV treatments that I have read about.  I have read that its very draining and that some people have to take a leave of absence from work for it.  He's not in a position to do that right now because he needs income for attorney's fees, and so on and so forth....So, you saying that maybe he wants someone to take care of him hit the nail on the head.  He wants my help, but he lives so far away or else I would've helped already, so I just try to get him motivated over the phone.

OK, so Iceman was absolutely incredible!   I met him at this fancy restaurant which has really good seafood.  Low light, linen tablecovers, I really thought it was way too much for a first date, but when I told Mom about it she said, "Go on, girl!"  LOL   :D

Iceman is so easy to talk to....and get this!  We were at the restaurant for three hours, the last ones left in our dining room....and the conversation got deep.  This guy is very confident in himself without being cocky, was a perfect gentleman, even gave me a rose when I met him outside of the restaurant....but!  We were talking and he says he goes to AA meetings 2x a week.  OK, so my radar went up at first, and he went on to say that he has been sober 20 years.  He used to drink and do drugs 20 years ago, but got into rehab at age 26 and has been better for it ever since.  He will be 45 in a few weeks. We talked about AA and I said I was surprised that he offered up this information so freely to me on a first date.  We both agreed either someone likes you or they don't, it is what it is. 

I guess my point is, I feel like he has aired his baggage and maybe he'll be compassionate when I air mine.  I told him I thought maybe he would fear being rejected by someone after sharing something so personal.  See where I am going with this?  I kind of feel like we're in the same corner.  I also asked if I was the first woman he dated coming out of his marriage, and yes, I am.  I jokingly told him I wondered how this would work, with me being the first girl, cause I have dated a few guys this year who just wanted to be out dating and dating after their long-term marriages had ended.  I was the first date for each of them, and I don't want to be the stepping stone again.

So, Iceman asked me during our date if he could see me again.  I smiled and said yes, but told him you're not supposed to ask a woman that on the date!  LOL  We will be getting together Sunday.  He just wants to be with me, its actually romantic, and I have missed romance, haven't had it since about 2003, lol!   :D  He also said he "volunteered" me to help him move to a new place in a few weeks, he just bought a new home.  So, that means I will meet some of his family.  I like that he is planning ahead about seeing me, its a nice compliment without being overbearing. 

Lordy be, I've got the seven dwarfs I'm dealing with, with men right now, and Iceman is definitely "Happy."  Heck, there's even a Doc in there,  :D  but I see them all falling by the wayside with Iceman in the picture now.  Damn, disclosure, here I come!  Bring it!  Iceman is a Scorpio, too, like me, so our birthdays are coming up soon, too.  I am 11/14/69, I'll be 38 soon.  If you've ever looked up a Scorpio+Scorpio couple, watch out for the heat and fireworks!  My two best GFs are both Scorpios, and one is married to a Scorpio...the men are very gentle and romantic with a wild side and the women, well, they are just the "wild side" lol! 

OK, enough daydreaming, but I wanted to share the good news about Ice.  I guess Mr. Annapolis will have to go by the wayside cause he just lives too far away, that really plays a big part in all of this, but he has fallen some for me, as well.  I have encouraged him to date other people and not put all of his eggs in one basket.  That was even before my date with Iceman tonight.

I got a call for an Office Manager position today.  It pays pretty good, is 25 miles from home against traffic, which is good, and its a one person office.  Everyone else is out in the field.  The HR lady called from corporate in Virginia today and said out of all of the resumes they picked eight people to do phone interviews with!  She is going to call back for about an hour on Wednesday for the phone interview, and then pick three or four people to meet with face-to-face.  I am hopeful, its crunch time.

I also called "the job" that I interviewed with 2x on 10/10 and 10/11, and have since  followed up with every week.  The damn receptionist, who I believe is new, still can't get the name of the company right when she answers the phone, and its been 10 days since my last call!  LOL  The GM was off today, so I left my name and number but didn't expect a call back.  I'll try again Monday or Tuesday.

I am so excited about Iceman, and I feel pretty good about disclosing after a few more dates.  I figure, "he's got his, and I got mine, and together we'll both do just fine!"  Oh and he likes to rock out, and we went to a club after dinner, and the music was SO loud it was awesome, and, last summer at band camp, and....."

I am giddy, gotta go calm my ass down!  :D  Queen and I hit on a fun website tonight, if you're into horoscopes!  We are reading about Rico and Iceman all over the place!  Here's the link!

http://www.sexualastrology.com/                 :D

~ Cindy
« Last Edit: November 03, 2007, 12:43:32 PM by MOONLIGHT1114 »
HIV+ since '93, 1/12 - CD4 785 and undet.   WOO-HOO!!

Offline Dragonette

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Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #81 on: November 03, 2007, 04:42:28 AM »
Hi Cind glad you had a fun date, it sounds great. Yes i would give the triple std combo some serious thought.... I am really happy for ya, and hopeful about this and the job.

BT, glad you're a little better, pls take good care over the weekend.

And Queen, you got some quality time, it seems...  ;)

I had a serious talk w/ BF last night, just out of nowhere, and I cried. But we both understand each other better. I hate when that happens though, I always feel like I am the problematic one in the relationship, the one with the bagage and special needs that should be catered to.

Have to work on the weekend too... but I am not going home with him in Nov as planned, too much stuff going on here for both of us (my work, his job applications). I could go on my own, but I think I will wait and hopefully it will happen after Christmas. It's not such a big deal, but b/c of all the guilt over my parents and the uncertainty of the future and the thoughts that if his family found out about me they would be shocked and disgusted, it all just added up. Anyway I am always gloomier during the night, which is when talks like this happen.

Right, today is a new day... for me, most everyone here (except for Tendai, but she doesn't read on the weekends) should be sleeping.

Sleep tight everyone, sweet dreams
"If you keep one foot in yesterday, and one in tomorrow, you piss all over today". Betty Tacy

Offline BT65

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Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #82 on: November 03, 2007, 08:41:28 AM »
Good morning ladies-

Wow!  What a lot happened in one night. 

Cin, I am so glad the date with Iceman went well.  I've noticed a lot of people don't mind sharing that they go to AA (or NA) much because it's almost as if this is the norm nowadays!  It's really awesome that he's been going for 20 years.  That means he has a good foundation.  And yes, most people in recovery are more sensitive to other people's situation.  God knows, they (we) put themselves in situations before that could have ended up a lot worse!  So, go for it!  About the HCV treatments, yes, it really wipes most people out.  I have quite a few friends who have HCV and I don't know one who has successfully been able to complete the treatments.  I guess they're worse than chemotherapy is.  But I do know our own goderator, Ann, has gone through them and completed them, so if you're really concerned about it, maybe you should pm her.  About the algebra, well, the teacher explained about the domains of functions in class, as we were all confused.  On the first homework assignment, I got a 98% (she e-mailed me last night).  I don't know how I managed that.  You know, if I can look at examples of how it's done, I do alright.  So I don't know how I'll fare on the exam where we won't be able to use our books. 

Queen, I'm anxiously awaiting to hear how the night went with Rico!  Don't keep us in suspense! 

Drag, I hope you don't have to work too much this weekend and get a chance to relax.  It sounds like you really need it.  Keep on keepin' on.  Know we're here for you, gf.  And PM me if you have anything you want to discuss privately.  I have a good ear and usually (notice I said usually) can offer some good advice. 

Ny, I would be extra cautious with Military Man.  Remember, he juggled another woman with you on the string.  Not that we all don't make mistakes.  Just remember what he did and is capable of doing before you go into anything girl.
Remember, you're going to bring a life into the world.  And even though it's his child as well, the kid doesn't need an unstable home to grow up in.

Viv, you just hang in there sweetie.  We are all here for you anytime you need us.

To everyone else, have a pleasant weekend.  I've got tons of homework to keep me busy.  Oh, the question about the smoking.  Cin, I'm taking regular puffs right now.  I know that'll change in the future and I know I can do it.  I'm debating going off the Chantix until I'm really ready.  I don't know if it's possible to build up immunity to it (Chantix), but I certainly don't want to for when I'm really ready to quit again.  Have a good one ladies-
I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

Offline toxicgirl

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Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #83 on: November 03, 2007, 09:45:17 AM »
Hello everyone, I'm new and have been told that this is where you hang out, so I'll introduce myself. I found out I was HIV positive and that I have AIDS all at the same time about a year and a half ago. My CD4 was 99, and now it's 165. I was hoping to get "better" faster, but I'm glad that some things have improved--like the fatigue. I'm surrounded by gay men, and although I love them and they are wonderful, I really want to talk to women, so that's why I'm here. I've never done this before, so it's one more new thing AIDS has brought into my life. I have lots of questions as soon as I get over being shy.

Offline cjc

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Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #84 on: November 03, 2007, 10:09:03 AM »
Hello Ladies. See things have been very busy here. Queen, glad you had a good time with Rico. hope that works out well.                              Ml, glad you date with Iceman went well. Betty is right, mostly people in NA or AA tend to be sympathetic cause it could have been them. So maybe that will work out great.                                            Betty , glad your class is going well. Hope you get to feeling better, It just shows your level of commitment that you will go even under the weather. Don't worry about the smoking thing. I have quit the chantix but am still down to 1 pack per day and saved the rest for when I get ready to try again.                                                                    NY, I feel for you being pregnant and feeling alone. I went through my last pregnancy alone and it is hard. And i didn't even have the HIV to deal with. You have a lot on your plate but when you see that beautiful Healthy baby, you will forget the pain and have a little person to love. Hope things get better for you and be wary of Military guy, you might be better off alone instead of dealing with a bunch of his stuff.                                                                 Dragonette, glad you had a talk with your BF. Didn't you mention you were thinking about getting pregnant. I know you can have a healthy baby with the HIV.      Maybe it would be better for you to stay home but If you are good enough for him, then you should be good enough for his family. The HIV is just one aspect of you, not the lovely total.                                                 I am doing well. I work tonight, we have reservations for 90 so everyone on staff will be working. I am torn about my friend at work. He is not real pushy but  he has made it clear that my HIV isn't a worry  to him but I am still scared. I did put up a new picture on the personals and have gotten several responses. None from NC, though. And a couple leghumpers as Moon says.Everything else is okay, my brother is still here and probably will be for a while but we are getting along okay. Robert is his normal fantastic self and I almost always get on well with my parents.        Anybody I missed, Cammie, EM(how are you?) hope ya'll are well. Later, Cristy                         

Offline Nygurl225

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Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #85 on: November 03, 2007, 11:25:07 AM »
Well it seems there has been a lot of action here this morning!!!

Cin~~ So glad your date went well!! A fancy romantic restaurant huh? Gosh not many men do that anymore. Thatís definitely a good sign! I hope things keep getting better between the two of you. Iceman sounds like a nice guy.

Queen, I think weíre all anxious to hear about RicoÖ.

Betty~~ I too will be doing homework all weekend. UGH!! Hang in there with the smoking. Your right you need to wait until your ready to quit. Nothing will work until your REALLY, TRULY ready. Best of luck with that!

As for Mr. Military. Iím definitely on guard. Iím doing my best to see this situation with ďopen eyesĒ.  Like I said before only time will tell what will happen.  But the good thing is I have school and other children to keep my mind off this chaos. Gosh!! I hate drama!! Well, Iím off to run errands and do schoolwork. I hope all of you ladies have a great Saturday!! 

Oh and Toxicgirl~~ Welcome!!!

Offline Queen Tokelove

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Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #86 on: November 03, 2007, 12:00:41 PM »
I don't even know what I am doing awake right now, I was up til about 4 am talking with Cindy on Yahoo.. ;D It was finally a full night spent with Rico. It started kinda late because for some reason power was going out around the city, it was out here and at his house but ours came back on first. While here, we got to talk more, his phone rang on 3 different occassions. Once he gave it to my girl which is his ex's sister, another time he ignored it and she must've left him a messed up message calling him an ass. He called her back in front of me and basically went on to tell her that he is moving on with his life and that if it didn't have anything to do with his son not to call him. He is tired of the lies, now that is the jist of it because he was going back and forth between spanish and english.

I wasn't thrilled that he had called her at first but after understanding what was said, I didn't mind so much. After he hung up, I gave him a massage, kinda like a reward for sticking to his guns. Shortly after that a whole lot of flirting went on, I won't bore you with the details of that. We made plans to get together on Sunday. He wanted to see me today but he had to work early this morning and he is dealing with a bit of a cold. I have the sniffles now but not sure if it is a cold or the flu shot. So, I told him to rest up and we would get together on Sunday. I just want to be lazy most of the day, got laundry to do later anyhow, I need all the rest I can get and will prolly go back to sleep to catch a nap after posting for a bit....

Yeah, so I come across the link Cindy posted in her post and it says all this stuff about Aries and Capricorns, some good, some not...Basically that I got my work cut out for me and Cindy and her fellow Scorpion gets all the hot and heavy stuff... :P Sooooo since we have moved on to about Cindy, what ya gonna do, girl? You gonna take the job and the man? At least you will be more comfortable around someone who is more like yourself on the emotional level and as far as the sexual, ahem there will be days of walking funny... ;)

Ny--- I know you are so ready to drop that load. Keep us posted. I told you my take on Mr. Military a few posts back so no need for me to repeat myself. I agree with you though, I think he was telling your friend that stuff to make it seem like he is being responsible, so good call there. What could be more important than the birth of his child? Other than the military stuff, I mean and I am sure they would let him be present for the birth if he is not going to be overseas or is he, I forget? Hold you head up, girl. If you wish, you can use my mantra...What don't kill you only makes you stronger. We all make mistakes when it comes to men or we wouldn't be talking about it here, the important thing is to learn from them and not make the same mistakes twice. Just take it one day at a time....

Toxic---Welcome to the Forums. Thanks for introducing yourself. Cindy will post links to our previous dating rants if she hasnn't already in this one.They're a good read when you are bored and want some female entertainment but also has helpful advice in it as well or you can just jump in here. When you are ready tell us more about yourself.

Ok, I need more sleep. My brain is starting to feel cloudy....I will check back in a bit later.....Have a good day...
Started Atripla/Ziagen on 9/13/07.
10/31/07 CD4-265 VL- undetectable
2/6/08 CD4- 401 VL- undetectable
5/7/08 CD4- 705 VL- undetectable
6/4/08 CD4- 775 VL- undetectable
8/6/08 CD4- 805 VL- undetectable
11/13/08 CD4- 774 VL--undetectable
2/4/09  CD4- 484  VL- 18,000 (2 months off meds)
3/3/09---Starting Back on Meds---
4/27/09 CD4- 664 VL-- undetectable
6/17/09 CD4- 438 VL- 439
8/09 CD4- 404 VL- 1,600
01-22-10-- CD4- 525 VL- 59,000
Cherish the simple things life has to offer

The Royal Blog

Offline MOONLIGHT1114

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Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #87 on: November 03, 2007, 01:12:01 PM »
Welcome Tox, the links to previous dating threads are here in Reply #36, just scroll up!  I was shy too, when I first joined the Forums in late June.  Funniest thing was, I couldn't figure out which guys were gay and which weren't.  Most posting here, ARE!  Makes for a lively, funny bunch!   :D

GQ ("Green Queen" for new ladies here)~  What are you doing up so early?  I need a nap, too!  Had a great time IMing with you last night, that was a riot, and I think we had a lot we had to vent about, all good stuff, though!

BT~  Glad to hear you got a 98% on your work!  Not so bad, doing math, huh?  I hope you can rest a little today.  Chicken noodle for you, GF!

Drag~  Girl, you are so strong, so don't beat yourself up about being the one with all of the problems in your relationship with your man.  They aren't "problems" they are simply life.  You have such a good head on your shoulders and so much living ahead of you to do.  Just take things as they come and remember to be ever so grateful that you have a good man to depend on.  Girl, I have been waiting for my "special needs to be catered to" for a long time, lol!  I am hoping to turn that corner soon!  As far as guilt over your parents, I am thinking you mean feeling guilty for not seeing them for the holidays?  I understand that.  My parents are driving 10 hours to Savannah, Georgia to see my sis-in-law and three kids for Thanksgiving.  Mom has asked me for months if I am going to go.  I don't think I can handle the car ride.  I hate being a passenger and get really nervous, and Dad thinks he's Mario Andretti and scares the shit outta me.  Nevermind my back and neck probs, so I have declined to go.  My brother is, and will still be, overseas for the holidays this year.  I just know the trip would be too exhausting, and I hope to be working by then, so I can't take a long weekend.  I don't know, I guess I could change my mind, but the dog kennel is prob booked already.  I don't want to leave Mr. Cheech and go through all of that traveling. 

So, Drag, maybe you could just do little things to let your parents know you're thinking of them in the meantime?  Do you call them on a regualr basis?  Send a little card each week--there's nothing better than getting mail from a loved one, I bet they would really like that.  You shouldn't feel guilty, but I know you do, so little acts of kindness may ease that some for you.   :)

Cristy and BT~  Thanks for your thoughts on being in AA, about those individuals being more sensitive.  I am so hopeful with Iceman, even though I have a little voice saying, "Oh he could turn and run from you...."  I am blocking it out.  He is so sure of himself without being arrogant, and we are on the same emotional level.  I;m glad we talked "deep" at dinner, because it showed me he wasn't afraid to go there and be honest about his feelings.  Its funny, because we are the same sign, we think so much alike!  He sent me an email today that just floored me in a good way, and he ended it by saying he couldn't wait to see me again!  Four other guys want to see me tonight and tomorrow, even Jay IMed me earlier today, asking if I was around.  I don't think he has the kids tonight.  Damn, good thing that link to Queen's astology site has "Torn between two signs" on it, lol!  Strangely enough, Jay is an Aquarius, and they are incompatible with Scorpio, maybe not emotional enough. 

I haven't called Mr. Annapolis today, and yes, the triple-whammy with so much possibly taxing his system and his delaying treatment has me on edge.  I have told him that before.  I mean, if the doc tells you to do something, you just do it, that's my way of thinking.  I have to remember I can't save everyone.  Sigh, just take your meds already, though.

I may have met my match with Iceman, ladies.  It'll be fun to see what we do tomorrow.  He suggested a movie, which isn't always my favorite thing, but I would be content to sit in the back row and hold hands.....   ;)

Oh, and Queen, you can "bore us with the details" anytime!   :P

~ Cindy
HIV+ since '93, 1/12 - CD4 785 and undet.   WOO-HOO!!

Offline Dragonette

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Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #88 on: November 03, 2007, 01:30:05 PM »
Girl, I have been waiting for my "special needs to be catered to" for a long time

 ;D  :D  ;D
you have me laughing here... I really hope you will soon, although that was not what I meant. but yeah, I am very grateful, I think half of my panic stems from that. Trying to keep everyone happy. trying to hold on to the moment. so much is changing... I want to live fully, but sometimes life is so risky. I will try to follow that tip... just, I am always behind on whatever it is I want to be doing, I really live life at a snail's pace.

 of course, I didn't do any work (half the time when i say i gotta work, I'm just saying it). I went to the gym, and had the PI squirts again. Now I know this is a little too much info...

Thanks to all of you for the kinds words.. Cristy, I am glad things are looking up for you. And Queen, and BT am glad you feel better. 98- that's incredible! you don't have to ace that way in the test, just pass, and I am sure you will since you did so great. Math is my weak spot too, I am just challenged that way. I will write more details to you soon b/c I really appreciate your POV, probabaly from work where I have the voice recognition software.

NY, what everyone said... we are going to have the first baby of the women's forum in 4 weeks. You brave thing. School, and kids, and a baby on the way... not to mention the reason we're all here for.

Toxic, welcome to the forums...

Have a great weekend all, over and out...




"If you keep one foot in yesterday, and one in tomorrow, you piss all over today". Betty Tacy

Offline confusedme

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Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #89 on: November 03, 2007, 02:23:25 PM »
I bookmarked the horoscope thing. I love reading about the signs. It's amazing to me how accurate they can be. I have the dirty horoscopes posted in my blog on myspace. They are meant to be a joke but I have found that they are pretty accurate too. If anyone wants to check them out, PM me and I'll give you the link. I am Capricorn like Queen. I always find myself surrounded by cancer people. I can't help but wonder why.

Cindy, glad things are going good with the Iceman. When you were talking about the smoke detector I tensed up for a second. I thought you were gonna say your house was damaged. Thank goodness it wasn't.

Queen, my fellow Cap, I'm so glad he held his ground with ol' girl. I'm with Cindy though...I would have loved to see some detail. I am the nosey one though. LOL Cowboys tomorrow. :)

NY, hugs to you. Its been years since I was pregnant but I feel ya. The last month is so exhausting.

Betty, I hope you are feeling better today. Rest up and get well soon.

Cristy, sounds like you have a big night at work. Do big parties like that usually tip well?

Toxic, welcome to the group!

Drag, good luck with the pregnancy planning.

srmn, dawn, viv, cammie, tendai ... I hope all is well with you. (hope I got everyone)

Hugs to everyone. Have a good weekend.
08/13/07 - Diagnosis confirmed
08/30/07 - T-cells 400, VL 6,500 (Baseline)
11/30/07 - T-cells 428, VL 9,950

Offline MOONLIGHT1114

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Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #90 on: November 03, 2007, 05:24:47 PM »
Call out to SUNSEEKER and CAM, how are you girls doing?   :-*

I see Queen is in this thread, maybe she is "working on the details" for us, while we patiently wait!  LOL

Iceman just called and we spoke for nearly 2 hours.  We are both smitten and we aren't shy about it, feelings are being worn right on our sleeves.  Its really a nice feeling.  We are doing breakfast (yes, BREAKFAST) tomorrow.  I am nocturnal, Moon thing and all, but with this extra hour, I figured I could swing it.  He wants me to help him look for furniture for his new place.  I just remembered he is moving the weekend of World AIDS Day, and I have volunteered to help with my support group.  Maybe I can do both, we'll see.

I wonder if I should disclose tomorrow or be patient?  Iceman was so quick to tell me about his issues and now I feel like I am holding back, but hell, its only been one day.  I want to have this roller coaster ride go a little while longer before I disclose, I think.  Maybe if we go for a drive into the mountains tomorrow and find a place to sit, I can tell him, I'll see.

More later on.........

~ Cindy
« Last Edit: November 03, 2007, 05:30:02 PM by MOONLIGHT1114 »
HIV+ since '93, 1/12 - CD4 785 and undet.   WOO-HOO!!

Offline Queen Tokelove

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Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #91 on: November 03, 2007, 05:53:44 PM »
Cindy says:GQ ("Green Queen" for new ladies here)~  What are you doing up so early?  I need a nap, too!  Had a great time IMing with you last night, that was a riot, and I think we had a lot we had to vent about, all good stuff, though!

Hell, I was asking myself that same question. But I remedied that, rolled up a doobie and watched a few cartoons and went back to sleep. When I woke up again, it was 3:30pm. I am rested a little bit but could still use a nap but I'll hold off. I did like that astrology site that I found, I didn't bookmark it though. I think Rico is catching on and I am going to try the things I saw on the site too, hell, it can't hurt. What I meant by Rico catching on is that he actually called me 3 times today while I was napping. I called him back, talked for a few and it is on for tomorrow. I told him he could call me back later. Last night was nice, we really got to talk and he assured me it is not about the sex but at the same time I could see the lust in his eyes and I think he saw it in mine too. He's giving me fever, Oh Lord.....*tucks her horns beneath her crown*

Confusedme says:Queen, my fellow Cap, I'm so glad he held his ground with ol' girl. I'm with Cindy though...I would have loved to see some detail. I am the nosey one though. LOL Cowboys tomorrow.

Ooooh another Cappy, when is your bday? Mine is January 12th, so much in common and you love the Cowboys too. I'm gonna have to adopt you.... ;) It's gonna be a good game tomorrow, hope they are not playing in Philly. I promise to give more details next time but you may regret it..... ;D

And Betty, I missed that you pretty much aced your test....98 percent, you go girl. So many ladies in school, I tried to do that once with Devry but when I lost my hearing they pretty much didn't want anything to do with me or so it seemed.

Christy-- It is good to hear from you. I hope things are going good at home. And yep, Ny is having our baby...The first I think for the ladies of the forums here, do you have names picked out yet? Cammie, check in with us lady, I know you are going through a funk but let us know you are ok, you know we are here even if you want to talk in PM.

I am going to get off here shortly, me and roomie ordered some food and I am starving. Who knew entertaining can be so exhausting....Whew.....

I see Cindy has posted while I was trying to post. You got a knack for reading me. Were we suppose to do the clock thing? Did I lose an hour? Maybe that's why I am so wiped out...
Started Atripla/Ziagen on 9/13/07.
10/31/07 CD4-265 VL- undetectable
2/6/08 CD4- 401 VL- undetectable
5/7/08 CD4- 705 VL- undetectable
6/4/08 CD4- 775 VL- undetectable
8/6/08 CD4- 805 VL- undetectable
11/13/08 CD4- 774 VL--undetectable
2/4/09  CD4- 484  VL- 18,000 (2 months off meds)
3/3/09---Starting Back on Meds---
4/27/09 CD4- 664 VL-- undetectable
6/17/09 CD4- 438 VL- 439
8/09 CD4- 404 VL- 1,600
01-22-10-- CD4- 525 VL- 59,000
Cherish the simple things life has to offer

The Royal Blog

Offline confusedme

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Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #92 on: November 03, 2007, 06:05:56 PM »
Queen...my birthday is January 17th. Only 2 days apart. Don't speak to soon. I'll be on your doorstep with adoption papers. LOL
08/13/07 - Diagnosis confirmed
08/30/07 - T-cells 400, VL 6,500 (Baseline)
11/30/07 - T-cells 428, VL 9,950

Offline BT65

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Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #93 on: November 03, 2007, 07:51:23 PM »
Good evening ladies-

Well, I got my article written for my Child & Adolescent Psychology class.  I do my math homework tomorrow.  Math is awful, Cin!  I don't like classes where there are "hard and fast" answers.  I like a grey area.  I can take a side and argue a really good point.  But I think that's part of my nature of being an addict.  I can always talk a good con, no matter what side I take.  But give me something that has only one answer and I don't like it.  Go figure....

Cristy, I hope you don't work too hard, but I also hope you make lots of good tips!  I imagine with such a big booking, they would tip well?  I'm glad you're getting along with your brother and it's not stressing you out a lot.

Toxic, welcome to the forums!  Please introduce yourself and tell us a little bit about yourself, of course when you feel comfortable doing it.  We're a good bunch here, all of us!  We're all special!

I'm gonna quickly check out a few other threads and go watch a movie and call it a night.  Cin, have a wonderful breakfast with the Iceman.  Be sure to tell us how it goes....  Queen, I hope you're having a good evening.  I hope things go well with Rico tomorrow.  Fill us in!

I wish Cammie and Em would post something.  To the rest of you ladies, the ones I forgot, have a great evening!
I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

Offline Queen Tokelove

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Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #94 on: November 03, 2007, 08:10:56 PM »
Queen...my birthday is January 17th. Only 2 days apart. Don't speak to soon. I'll be on your doorstep with adoption papers. LOL

Oh Wow, 5 days apart actually, that is so cool. I usually don't have much in common with most females. Rule number one, no one shows up on the doorstep, must call and make appointment.... ;D I'm gonna have to check and see when the game comes on. I may have to record it if it comes on tv.
Started Atripla/Ziagen on 9/13/07.
10/31/07 CD4-265 VL- undetectable
2/6/08 CD4- 401 VL- undetectable
5/7/08 CD4- 705 VL- undetectable
6/4/08 CD4- 775 VL- undetectable
8/6/08 CD4- 805 VL- undetectable
11/13/08 CD4- 774 VL--undetectable
2/4/09  CD4- 484  VL- 18,000 (2 months off meds)
3/3/09---Starting Back on Meds---
4/27/09 CD4- 664 VL-- undetectable
6/17/09 CD4- 438 VL- 439
8/09 CD4- 404 VL- 1,600
01-22-10-- CD4- 525 VL- 59,000
Cherish the simple things life has to offer

The Royal Blog

Offline MOONLIGHT1114

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Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #95 on: November 03, 2007, 08:52:08 PM »
Wow, I had some pasta salad for dinner and my diabetic self is ready for lights out!  LOL  Its 842pm on fall back night, so much time, the night is still YOUNG!  But I DO have my breakfast tomorrow.  ;)  Moon and breakfast with a man?  I don't think I have ever done that....some things are worth trying.

Of course, crazy me, I am getting in a funk tonight thinking that this is too good to be true, telling myself not to get my hopes up with Iceman.  But damn, if anyone would ever understand me, its Iceman.  He talks, he communicates, he's sensitive and masculine all at one time, and he has clearly said he is crazy about me.  I know, I know.  Lust.  Long marriage ending.  First chick outta the gate for him.  Shit.  Sometimes I wonder what the hell God's plan is for me.  I know there's a reason for all of this.  I don't want to turn my ass into a leg-humper "female style" just cause I think a guy is great.  All I can do is do it, go forth and conquer, lol!   :P

Now I am laughing at myself so I must be going insane....I was thinking of that astrology site that Queen and I were on.  It tells you how to seduce different signs (like I need any help  ;)  ).  The first thing it said for a Scorpio woman and a Scorpio man was something like, "Just take off all of your clothes and go get it."  Queen knows, what a riot.   :D

Oh, and as all of the recently divorced from long marriage, first-out-of-the-gate guys have been for me this year, um, "Fido is fixed."  Shit, that brings up more crap with safe sex.  Times have changed boys, since you were unmarried back in the day, times have changed.

Queen, turn your clocks back an hour tonight at 2am, cause I know you'll still be awake.  At 2am, make it 1am.   :P

~ Cindy
HIV+ since '93, 1/12 - CD4 785 and undet.   WOO-HOO!!

Offline vivyt

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Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #96 on: November 03, 2007, 10:00:18 PM »
Betty,

What are you going to school for?

Offline Winiroo

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Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #97 on: November 03, 2007, 10:22:44 PM »
My sweet heart has been out of town trying to kill Bambi with his brother and step dad.
Good news, he didnt get one and I dont have to eat deer meat sausage and jerky forever and ever.
He just called and said he is on his way home so maybe he'll be here before midnight.

Wait.... midnight is now 11 o'clock.

Maybe it wont be dark outside when I wake up now.

My brain is all over the place tonight. Must be too much HIV in there. LOL

Offline camille07

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Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #98 on: November 03, 2007, 11:42:33 PM »
Hey Girls-

Seems like I've some what ascended from my ashes. I was taking shelter from the very things that made me say ....hello me me me! Wake up! I am going through a lot o shit...
hmmmm
a divorce
selling a house
a diagnosis
a job change, just laturally (meaning a lot more job responsibility)
I'm dealing with all of it, but it took time for me to extrapolate each area and deal with it.  Being broke didnt help.  This went on for some time.  It worked for a while but it finally came to a crashing halt.
I finally found peace in my faith.  Things have started to work out for me...sigh

I put my thoughts in a nut shell not to bore you all.


hugs to you all
« Last Edit: November 03, 2007, 11:49:56 PM by camille07 »

Offline BT65

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Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #99 on: November 04, 2007, 06:45:52 AM »
Good morning ladies-

Cammie, long time no hear!  And why would you ever think you would bore us?  We're here for you, gf.  Talk about anything you need to talk about.  It sounds like you're going through an awful lot, and I'd hate for you to think you have to bear it alone.  Please don't forget to communicate with us!

Viv, I'm getting a bachelor's in psychology.  A couple of my teachers and my therapist (who is a PhD) have encouraged me to go on to get my master's.  But one thing at a time.  Anyway, I have a year left, I should be done next December.  That is, if the campus I go to offers all the classes I need.  Of course, if I did consider getting my master's I would have to make sure it would be damn well worth it, as you know people can't get financial aid past a bachelor's.  So that would mean more student loans.  And I really don't want to owe a lot when I get done with school.  What are you going to school for?

Cin, I hope you're up by now getting ready for your breakfast date. How exciting!  Have you seen I-Hop's new advertisement for those different pancakes (pumpkin etc.)?  Man, they look good.  I know we're diabetic, but I would assume that I-Hop would have some kind of "lite" syrup.  I don't know what you like for breakfast, but those sure sound good to me.

Wini, so your boyfriend deer hunts, eh?  I remember the best dear meat I ever had was when I went to a Native American longhouse and there was a "feast" afterwards.  Someone made some kind of venison that was absolutely delicious.  I personally could never kill an animal for sport, but that's me.  I certainly wouldn't begrudge someone who does, as long as they eat what they kill.

Queen, I hope all goes well with Rico today.  Maybe you could suggest to him that he turn off his cell phone when he's spending time with you.  That would cut down on the interruptions and annoyances.  Just a suggestion....  let us know how it goes!  I will be anxiously waiting to hear about it (and Cin's date with the Iceman).

I wonder how Em's been doing.  Girl, are you still with us?  Miss hearing from you! 

Well, today is church.  Then I have to come home and do math homework. I hope I can make some sense out of it.  Part of this week's homework is about finding the slope of numbers.  Wish me luck!  Other than that, my sponsor is having a get-together of the "sponsorship family."  This means that her sponsor (who is my bestfriend) will be there along with her sponsees, their sponsees etc.  We each are getting five personal care items for the women at the local YWCA here.  Apparently they don't get funding to get the things for these women like the other local shelters do.  So we're going to give them an early X-mas present.  I got my items yesterday.  I got shampoo, conditioner, body wash, lotion and deoderant.  We each also are buying baskets to put the items in to give to the women.  I didn't do anything fancy, just went to the local dollar store.  I hope that's going to be good enough.  I wish I had tons of money so I could buy each woman something from like Bath & Body Works. 

My granddaughter called me yesterday when I was working on a report for one of my classes, so I called her when I was done writing it.  She wanted to come over, but because I still had to put the report on the computer and print it out, and read some in one of my textbooks, I told her I would pick her up for supper and take her out.  Well, when I got to the grandkid's house, she was pretty sick.  She had a low-grade fever, and a headache, centered around the sinuses.  I'm telling you ladies, be careful.  This stuff is going around.  So I told her we would go another time.  I also went and got her a Bratz activity book to do while she's lying around (she luvs Bratz).  Please send some good energy this way for her. I would appreciate it. 

I hope all you ladies have a good one-
I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

Offline vivyt

  • Member
  • Posts: 546
Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #100 on: November 04, 2007, 09:08:17 AM »
Betty,

I am a teacher and my degree is in Child and Adolescent Development, so when I saw that you wrote a paper in this field I thought you might be in my field. I was in the Master's program the year I became sick and made it almost to the end. I was in the process of writing my thesis and I was just too sick to finish. I need to go back and finish but I haven't really been motivated. What field of psychology are you going into? PhD or PsyD?

Vivy

Offline Winiroo

  • Member
  • Posts: 2,082
  • Positive since 1991
Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #101 on: November 04, 2007, 01:46:04 PM »
This is the first time in 4 years he has gone. One of those manly things guys occationally have to do I suppose. I think it was an excuse to see his brother and step father. It was a 3-4 hour drive to land near Houston. I think he got it out of his system for a while. He was ready to come home.
Billy isnt the gung ho rough and tough kinda guy.  He'd likely protest and be embarrassed if he read this but he's more of a sweetheart than a Rambo.
But I like him that way so it shouldnt be a issue.

Offline Winiroo

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  • Posts: 2,082
  • Positive since 1991
Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #102 on: November 04, 2007, 01:47:30 PM »
Guess I should have made it clear I was answering on the deer hunting above. LOL

Offline Queen Tokelove

  • Member
  • Posts: 6,033
  • Smokey the Smurf
Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #103 on: November 04, 2007, 04:29:46 PM »
Afternoon Ladies------

No date with Rico this evening because he came over last night. He spent the night too.. ;) And there was not one phone call, I was impressed. It felt nice to have arms wrapped around me all night even though I kept waking up. I guess that was because I am not use to anyone being in my bed. He left a little after 10 am but called me a few hours ago. We talked for a few and he said he would call me later. I think we are both reeling in the after glow of last night. We have both been sleeping off and on most of the day but that missing hour prolly had a lot to do with it too.... So, I am all  ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D.

I am wondering how Cindy's breakfast date went. It must have been good and still going cause she hasn't been logged onto yahoo.. ;) I am sure she will supply details when she is available. This thread has gotten past the 100 post mark, it's time to start Dating Part X, who is up to the task this time? Confused, Ny, Viv, Sunseeker, Tendai, one of you need to start one, I think we are all taking turns with it.

Cammie-- Sorry to hear you are still going through some rough patches but you know you can vent here. Betty-- I am sorry to hear about your grand daughter not feeling well, hope she gets better soon. I know there is something going on around here too. I have been sniffling but not sure if it's cause of my flu shot or being around some sick people with colds.

Winiroo--- Welcome to the Forums. I have been seeing you post in the movie thread, you are funny as hell, you should fit in nicely here. I was lol about the bf hunting Bambi. I use to use that line too. Tell us more about yourself.

Speaking of movies, I am watching The Pulse which seems kinda good but I will have to watch it again since I have been kinda distracted. Hopefully by the time I return someone will have started a new thread. Have a good evening.
Started Atripla/Ziagen on 9/13/07.
10/31/07 CD4-265 VL- undetectable
2/6/08 CD4- 401 VL- undetectable
5/7/08 CD4- 705 VL- undetectable
6/4/08 CD4- 775 VL- undetectable
8/6/08 CD4- 805 VL- undetectable
11/13/08 CD4- 774 VL--undetectable
2/4/09  CD4- 484  VL- 18,000 (2 months off meds)
3/3/09---Starting Back on Meds---
4/27/09 CD4- 664 VL-- undetectable
6/17/09 CD4- 438 VL- 439
8/09 CD4- 404 VL- 1,600
01-22-10-- CD4- 525 VL- 59,000
Cherish the simple things life has to offer

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Offline confusedme

  • Member
  • Posts: 74
  • wishing away reality
Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #104 on: November 04, 2007, 09:01:19 PM »
I am so LMAO @ myself for the typo yesterday. Doesn't that make me look REALLY bad at math. I feel ya on the call first thing, Queen. I cannot stand the unannounced guest. I am subject to not answer the door.

Well, DH is coming on and I'm watching the Cowboys game during commercials. We're up by 7 now. YAY!

08/13/07 - Diagnosis confirmed
08/30/07 - T-cells 400, VL 6,500 (Baseline)
11/30/07 - T-cells 428, VL 9,950

Offline nymphaea

  • member
  • Posts: 1
Re: Dating Thread Part IX - Fanciful, Fits and Futures
« Reply #105 on: November 15, 2007, 12:13:33 PM »
Hi everyone

 Anyone got any suggestions about dating?  I have been trying the dating sites - been burned pretty badly.  I thought dating positive guys would have been easier, but that doesn't seem to be the case.  There are so many who seem to meet me online, think I'm the best thing since sliced bread, and then go cold.  It's kind of hard for me over here as there are none too many positive straight guys here in Australia.  I am intelligent, attractive and funny, but I don't know whats going on with some of these fellows.  Sorry if I sound a bit soppy but I just got my heart smushed - again - and didn't know where else to turn.  Anyone else got advice  about this whole internet dating thingy? :'(

 


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