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Author Topic: really frighted  (Read 5695 times)

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Offline frightenedguy

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really frighted
« on: October 18, 2007, 02:10:48 PM »
so i'm really frightened and i'm doing horrible at school because of it. I am a 20 year old male. 10 weeks ago i played around with another guy that i had met at a cafe that was 25. i performed oral sex on him and i'm worried that since i had a little sore throat at the time, that might be a factor (i was recovering from a cold, there weren't any open wounds or anything, just a minute sore throat) He also figured me a couple time until i told him not to, i'm tight down there. Last he rub his penis in my anus region but didn't penetrate, but i'm worried that maybe some precum got on his finger and maybe when he fingered me, the virus might have gone from his precum to his figure to my anus. I have tested at 6.5 weeks and 7.5 weeks- both negative (i used the unigold radid test which the lady at the clinic said was accurate 4-5 weeks after exposure). I have read many times that most people seroconvert by 6 weeks but i'm still planning on getting a 12 week test just to ease my mind. HOwever i've been extremely depressed lately. Since i'm a young health guy, and this was my first time with a guy, i'm thinking that i should have had developed enough antibodies by my 7.5 week test. What do you all think.

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: really frighted
« Reply #1 on: October 18, 2007, 02:28:49 PM »
Hi,

First of all, nothing you did with this other guy put you at risk for transmission. HIV is a fragile virus and not easily transmitted. It requires a very friendly environment and fingering doesn't cut it as far as that is concerned. And this of course is assuming the guy you were with is HIV+.

There is much more evidence against sucking being a risk than credible evidence that it is risky. For instance there is a very longterm studio of sero-discordant couples, both gay and straight who had lots of protected intercourse and lots of unprotected mutual oral. Not one sero-negative partner has become infected. And reports of infection through giving oral pretty much turn out to be of doubtful reliability. Getting a blowjob is absolutely no risk.

As far as HIV is concerned what you really need to know is that if and when you get around to having anal intercourse, whoever the insertive partner is must wear a latex condom. NO EXCEPTIONS! Unprotected intercourse is the real risk -- not rubbing, fingering, mutual masturbation, kissing or oral, (especially without ejaculation) or other things that people get scared about.

You're apparently just beginning to be sexually active. Take your time and only do what you're comfortable with is my suggestion.

This time out you have no cause for concern. By the way, the average time to seroconversion iss 22 days. All but the smallest number of those who are going to seroconvert will do so within 4-6 weeks after an exposure. So your negatives at this point are something you can pretty much take to the bank. Re-test if you must for your own peace of mind at 13 weeks, but I certainly don't expect you to get anything other than another negative result.

Remember, condoms everytime for intercourse.

Cheers,
Andy Velez

Offline frightenedguy

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one more question
« Reply #2 on: October 18, 2007, 04:12:56 PM »
I forgot to mention that i started having symptoms (tiredness/soft stool) on the 1st of september. My last test was on the 3rd of october. If those symptoms i was experiencing were ARS then the antibody test should have detected antibodies correct?

Offline frightenedguy

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Re: really frighted
« Reply #3 on: October 18, 2007, 04:30:16 PM »
i'm sorry i pushed the wrong button and it posted before i was done. I also wanted to ask about your quote "all but the smallest number of those that are going to serconvert...) when you say "all but the smallest of number" are those people the ones that are having cancer treatment or IV users and thats what's causing them to seroconvert at a later date. As you can tell, i'm worried that i'm one of those "small numbers of people" that slipped passed the 6 week mark/7 week mark.

Offline Ann

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Re: really frighted
« Reply #4 on: October 18, 2007, 04:33:46 PM »
fright,

Yes, if your symptoms from September had anything to do with seroconversion, you would have tested positive by now.

I don't expect your conclusive test result to change and neither should you.

BTW, there  really is no difference between the 12 week and 13 week window. It has to do with what one considers to be a month - thirty days or four weeks. It's splitting hairs. Anything past twelve weeks is definitely conclusive. Also, as far as I know, the official window period in Australia is twelve weeks. Matty might chime in on this later.

Unless you're on chemotherapy for cancer, on anti-rejection drugs following organ transplant, or have been injecting (street) drugs every single day of your life, for years, then you will not seroconvert late.

Again, I do not expect your results to change and neither should you.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

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"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline frightenedguy

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Re: really frighted
« Reply #5 on: October 19, 2007, 06:42:28 PM »
I noticed that the topic of anal-penis rubbying wasn't specifically addressed and that is now what i'm most worried about. I have read other forums on here about this but i'm still worried. His penis was moving around my anus but i never felt penetration (i'm new to all this so i'm tight down there). Should i be worried?

Offline Matty the Damned

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Re: really frighted
« Reply #6 on: October 19, 2007, 07:02:31 PM »
Yeah, funny that. "Anal penis rubbing" isn't a risk so they decided to leave it out of a document which lists the specific behaviours that can transmit HIV. Who would have thought eh?

Just for the record you can't get HIV from someone rubbing his knob against your bunghole.

but i never felt penetration (i'm new to all this so i'm tight down there). Should i be worried?

Having been penetrated by the best, Matty the Damned can assure you that if this devil had gotten his willy up your poop chute, you'd remember it. You didn't feel penetrated because you weren't.

Anything past twelve weeks is definitely conclusive. Also, as far as I know, the official window period in Australia is twelve weeks. Matty might chime in on this later.

The official window period in Australia is 12 weeks.

MtD

Offline frightenedguy

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Re: really frighted
« Reply #7 on: October 19, 2007, 07:18:28 PM »
thanks matty for you reply. i'm just experiencing OCD right now. My mind is racing trying to think of all the "what ifs"  Its driving me insane. what if while rubbing some of his precum got near buy butthole and then was pushed in by his finger?

Offline Matty the Damned

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Re: really frighted
« Reply #8 on: October 19, 2007, 07:30:14 PM »
Again no risk.

People don't experience obsessive compulsive disorder "right now", it's a serious psychiatric problem which requires medical attention.

If you think you have OCD or any other personality disorder you should speak to your doctor.

MtD

Offline frightenedguy

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Re: really frighted
« Reply #9 on: October 19, 2007, 08:06:51 PM »
window period question

So i'm planning on getting retested at 12 weeks (even though i wish i could have some comfort with the 7.5 week negative test)  but i just want to clear some things up. I've read the same stats that andy stated on many websites. My question conserns the big gap between 2-12 weeks being that 22 days is the average and most seroconvert by 6 weeks. does the regulatory agency CDC or CCD (whatever) state 12 weeks because not all testing sites use the same up-to-date tests (different generations) or is it because there are still a large portion of the population that seroconverts after 6 weeks? I also read that Ann foresees that 12 week requirement being lowered to 6 weeks. That makes me feel that it is the tests that are a critical factor here not so much the person's body. I"m a 20 year old male (as stated above) so i figure that since i'm healthy, i shouldn't expect to fall within that category with those that seroconvert after 6 weeks. it has been 10 weeks not and i think these final 2 wil lbe the most painful. I'm worried that i'm going to either test positive or get a false positive for a fluke of a reason.

Offline RapidRod

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Re: really frighted
« Reply #10 on: October 19, 2007, 08:39:10 PM »
No, if you would read about the tests the tests were FDA approved for a 3 month test post exposure, to get a conclusive negative result. It has nothing to do with the CDC. How can you test positive when you didn't have a risk?

Offline frightenedguy

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Re: really frighted
« Reply #11 on: October 19, 2007, 08:48:56 PM »
great question. i keep re-reading the comments that andy, ann, and matt have said beause they give me hope. I know it has been stated that i don't have a risk by this forum but the lady and the clinic has made me worry because she said that since i was with a gay male, i engaged in risky behavior. I just wish that more information was known about this disease and that it was communicated properly by officials rather than leaving the population in the dark. I think i have almost read every posting on this website about oral sex/anal rubbing and i'm still questioning "what if i'm the one" what if i'm the one that gets it past the 7.5 week mark. I'm trying my best to stay calm but its tearing me apart. I truly appriciate everything that people have said thus far on this forum. It is giving me the will to continue the schoolwork that i have fallen way behind in.

Offline RapidRod

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Re: really frighted
« Reply #12 on: October 19, 2007, 09:03:04 PM »
You did not have a risk and we don't do "what if" questions.

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: really frighted
« Reply #13 on: October 19, 2007, 11:06:21 PM »
Re-focusing your energy on to your schoolwork is a great idea.

After getting a negative at 7.5 weeks you are all but guaranteed that you will collect another negative at week 13. Really.

Cheers,
Andy Velez

Offline frightenedguy

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Re: really frighted
« Reply #14 on: October 22, 2007, 12:06:15 AM »
I want to say thank you for your replies. I has brought some comfort to my life. i only have 2 more weeks until the 12 week mark. Yet i'm still very worried about it. I have had loose stolls since the middle of august (only once a day) every other day. Everytime it happens i get freaked out that i'm still seroconverting. I thought that since i had the same symptoms at the beginning of september, my test at the beginning of october would have shown it. I'm really still just freaking about about the incident. Not saying that it happened (cuz i know it didn't or else i would have noticed) , why is it that anal sex is so risky. I read about how it is the riskiest but is it due to that fact that there isn't any fluids in there except possible lube or is it because of the mucuus membrane. I"m a little confused about that. If the hiv virus touches a mucus membrane, does than mean it can seep right into it, or does there have to be a cut, tear, abrasions, for it to enter? I keep on telling myself that i didn't have a risk, however i can't help thinking about "what ifs" (i know you don't answer what ifs. Matty, why isn't "rubbing you knob on another's bunhole" risky? I know i didn't experience any pain and i'm sure i would have since i never been penetrated by a penis. 

Offline Matty the Damned

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Re: really frighted
« Reply #15 on: October 22, 2007, 01:18:04 AM »
Matty, why isn't "rubbing you knob on another's bunhole" risky? I know i didn't experience any pain and i'm sure i would have since i never been penetrated by a penis.

Because HIV is transmitted inside the body. That means past your anus and in your rectum. Put simply the specific cells that HIV needs to mount a successful infection are found in the rectum not on the anus.

At least in terms of butt-sex.

MtD

Offline frightenedguy

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Re: really frighted
« Reply #16 on: October 22, 2007, 03:28:48 AM »
i just wanted to add that i'm having really relaly strange digestive issues. My stomach/intestines are almost always growling and i do not have hard stool. In september i did loose roughly 10 pounds but i tested in october and it was negative (possible exposure occured earily-mid august). I was dumb and went to the "i just tested poz" and there was  a guy you said he tested poz for mutual masterbation. i freaked out and now i'm crying desprately. help

Offline Ann

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Re: really frighted
« Reply #17 on: October 22, 2007, 08:07:50 AM »
fright,

See your doctor about your tummy problems - they're nothing to do with hiv.

As for reading what people say in the other forum, they can say what they like, but doesn't mean what they say is scientifically valid. I'd advise you to stay out of the other forums.

I still don't expect your conclusive test to be anything other than hiv negative.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline frightenedguy

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Re: really frighted
« Reply #18 on: October 22, 2007, 06:52:39 PM »
HOw long does the seroconversion process take? I found when it usually occurs, but i haven't discovered the typlical duration of effects.

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: really frighted
« Reply #19 on: October 23, 2007, 08:42:15 AM »
If the symptoms of seroconversion show up, they can last a week to two. It's a one time event. They show up and once gone do not recur. But because those symptoms are so similar to flu and other things, symptoms are never the way to reliably know about HIV status. 
Andy Velez

Offline frightenedguy

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Re: really frighted
« Reply #20 on: October 29, 2007, 01:53:37 AM »
I just got a negative at the 10.5 week mark. How reliable is that?

Offline RapidRod

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Re: really frighted
« Reply #21 on: October 29, 2007, 04:04:45 AM »
It's a conclusive test. You didn't have a risk in the first place.

Offline frightenedguy

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Re: really frighted
« Reply #22 on: October 29, 2007, 02:28:14 PM »
thanks rapid. what do you think ann and andy? Matt?

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: really frighted
« Reply #23 on: October 29, 2007, 05:52:18 PM »
You're still shopping for more reassurance?

Of course your 10.5 week test result is valid.

You were never at risk to begin with so testing wasn't even necessary.

Andy Velez

Offline frightenedguy

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Re: really frighted
« Reply #24 on: October 29, 2007, 06:52:03 PM »
i know but i am still worried. My councilor said i was at risk and a small number of people in your "just poz" section say they were infected from performing oral sex. This is the standpoint that i'm making. I was at risk (even though it could only be theoredical) nonetheless, i was at risk. Assuming that, my 10.5 week test proves i wasn't infected. Right? this is the way i look at it.

Offline RapidRod

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Re: really frighted
« Reply #25 on: October 29, 2007, 08:04:34 PM »
You were never at risk. PERIOD.

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: really frighted
« Reply #26 on: October 29, 2007, 09:55:03 PM »
Given the tenaciousness of your anxiety I suspect that you will probably want to re-test at 13 weeks just to collect another negative result for your collection. I don't have any doubts that you will test negative.

This fear has got a hold on you. Now it's all about feelings and not HIV science. So go ahead, re-test in another 2.5 weeks and collect your final negative.

This is NOT an HIV situation even if your mind tells you otherwise. Really. And if you keep on indulging in looking for places and people to feed your fears, believe me, you will  find them. No solid basis in what they say, but you're all to ready to latch on to that junk. You are HIV negative.
Andy Velez

Offline frightenedguy

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delayed seroconversion
« Reply #27 on: November 12, 2007, 12:49:11 AM »
Hi agian. I was wondering where did you get the information that suggests that only those who have been iv drug user, organ transplant recipients, or chemo patients are the only ones who seroconvert late? The lady at the health department said that perfectly healthy people seroconvert late because the virus remained dormant in their body I'm so confused by this. I just recieved by 12 week negative and was happy for awhile and then was told this and that a 6 month test is warranted. Then, that night (12.5 after exposer) i came down with the worst flu-like illness. I don't think i had a fever, but i threw up over and over again until i was dry heaving, i had watery stool, i was so dehydrated that my vision was blurred and i was shaking uncontrolably. It only last 6 hours and then i was fine. I might have been food poisening but it was a frightening experience and naturaly i have turned to those here whose opinion and insight i have come to greatly depend on and value.

Thanks

frightened

Offline Matty the Damned

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Re: delayed seroconversion
« Reply #28 on: November 12, 2007, 01:07:15 AM »
Please keep all your additional thoughts, questions and comments in your original thread. This helps us to follow your story and give you the most accurate advice.

If you can't find you original thread click on the red link I've provided above. Alternatively you can click on the "show own posts" link in the left hand column of any forums page.

Your questions will not be answered until you return to your original thread.

MtD

Offline Matty the Damned

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Re: really frighted
« Reply #29 on: November 12, 2007, 01:18:47 AM »
Thank you for returning to your original thread.

Frightened, if the lady at the health department told you that healthy people seroconvert late "because the virus lies dormant" then she's a fucking dingbat.

And no I don't know why she would say something like that. What I do know is she's flat out wrong.

Almost all people who are going to test positive for HIV will do so by the six week mark. A small few take up to 13 weeks and only an extremely tiny minority with specific health issues such as mentioned above can take longer than 13 weeks.

You are not one of those people.

The information we give here is based on firm peer reviewed science. Our lessons are developed by leading experts in their fields and all answers provided by AIDSmeds experts are carefully reviewed by other experts to ensure that no misinformation is given out. That's one of the reasons only members with prior approval can answer questions asked in this forum.

We have already explained to you in careful, patient detail that you are not HIV positive and why this is so.

You've been here long enough to have read our Welcome Thread. You should review that thread and note the following:

Please do not start a new thread every time you have another question or thought - regardless if you think your questions are related to each other or not. It helps us to help you when you keep all your thoughts or questions in one thread and it helps other readers to follow the discussion. Additional threads will be merged.

and

Anyone who continues to post excessively, questioning a conclusive negative result or no-risk situation, will be subject to a four week Time Out (a temporary ban from the Forums). The purpose of a Time Out is to encourage you to seek the face-to-face help we cannot provide on this forum.


Do you understand?

MtD

 


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